Disclaimer: I still do not own the divergent universe..that is all V Roth. I am still just the girl throwing stick figures into her thunder dome.

Song inspiration for this chapter is I'm On Fire by Bruce Springsteen

Chapter 5 - Getting What I Want

Eric

The next morning rolled in too quick and on too little sleep before I finally got up at my normal time of four am and started my routine. Luckily this morning there aren't any meetings on the schedule, so I wouldn't have to interrupt what I do before my normal workday begins.

My first stop will be to the dining hall to get some coffee with Chase and Zach instead of here in my apartment. Then I'll get in some training time for myself. I'll do all of this before I have to spend the day with initiates. I guess you could say it's my way of preparing for a day that's sure to be filled with frustration and bullshit. I've never looked forward to having to deal with initiation and that was even during the years that I wasn't as involved as I'm going to be this year.

Just the thought of it is enough to have me scowling and filled with dread. In the past, that was what I normally woke up and felt during initiation, but this year is different because there's Kat. There's still a feeling of dread but for a completely different reason than usual.

Last night the bomb being dropped on me about Kat should have obliterated any thoughts that could even hint at any kind of connection or relationship other than me being her leader, trainer, and watcher. I spent the entire night trying to build up the proper anger and hate that would ensure I'll keep away.

I ran through that list of reasons why it's out of the question, adding to the list with all the tidbits I found out throughout the day. But all those reasons hadn't stopped the dreams from tormenting me.

The dream, nightmare…. whatever the hell it was, left me sweating and shaking. That much isn't new. What's new is that the faceless person that tormented me previously clearly has a face now.

Kat was there anytime I tried to close my eyes.

The smile that left me feeling like I couldn't breathe the first time I saw it, that was in full force but this time, it was all for me.

Before it was just faint images of me with someone, but that was replaced with detailed and visceral images of the two of us together. I had woken up, drenched and gasping for air while at the same time reaching for Kat and feeling such a sense of loss it almost tore me in two when my arms came up empty. I could still feel the warmth of her pressed against me that I felt in the dream.

The dream also drove me to my shower where the images and feelings continued to assault me until I had to resort to providing myself relief right that second. I stumbled into the shower, sweaty from fighting the dream and the passion that it burned into the waking world and took matters into my own hands. Literally.

Images of her there with me, her body pressed against mine, her lips wrapped around me as her hazel eyes looked up at me with passion and pleasure, had me coming undone sooner than I could have predicted. It had me crying out hoarsely in my release.

I'm left standing here in my shower, panting into the spray, wondering what the fuck just happened to me. It isn't just that I've never felt anything remotely this intense for a person, but that I have never felt anything like this period.

So, I have to ask myself what I need to do about this? Because this is unacceptable. I could try and shut it down and off like I've done all other emotions, but that feels like I'm being a fucking coward, and that just isn't in me.

I scoff at myself, push away from the shower wall and run my hands over my face before turning my face up to let the shower head on the ceiling wake me up with its stream of cold water.

Yeah, that shit isn't happening. I'm not going to hide like some fucking coward for anything or anyone.

I also know that at the very least I have to have her, even if all I get is once. If just the thought of being with her could leave me having one of the hardest orgasms I've ever had, then having her in the flesh is sure to be ten times that experience.

I have to have her.

So, I know I'm going to try. I also know I'm going to have to wait and bide my time to actually make a move. That doesn't mean that I can't set the stage though. Get closer to her and get answers to all these questions I have.

More importantly, I have to make sure that she makes it to the end of initiation because there's no way I'll move in before then.

That's one line I will not cross not even for her.

The other lines, I know as I get dressed and get my crap for the day together, yeah those are probably going to be blown to hell.

How far I go will depend on what I feel is needed but it's going to start with inviting myself to her training this morning. I glance at my watch as I head out of my apartment and wonder if I should skip the coffee and scope out the training room. I quickly discount that when I acknowledge that I feel sluggish and my vision is still slightly blurry from not being fully awake or even rested.

I need my dose of caffeine too much to skip it right now.

Chase is in the dining hall already. He's staring into his cup of coffee and looking contemplative as I join him. I frown at him but don't bother to speak. I'm too busy getting as much coffee into my system as fast as I can.

"You're looking way too fucking serious this early in the damn morning," My voice is still thick with sleep even after half of my first cup.

Chase looks up, tilts his head to the side and sighs as his eyes meet mine. "Eric, we need to talk." His tone low and serious.

I don't need to ask but I do anyway, not really looking forward to what I knew yesterday was going to need to happen. I know it needs to happen even more now that I know I'm not going to stay away from her like I fooled myself into thinking I would.

It makes me a bit more snappish when I finally speak after glaring at him over my mug. "What could we possibly need to talk about so early in the morning?"

Chase shrugs, his frown still in place. "We need to talk about her."

There's no need to ask who the ' he r' he's referring to is.

"Okay." I say simply and more calmly than I at all feel.

I really am trying to breathe through it but the jealousy I had yesterday has flared up hard and fast. Like it never went away in the first place. I don't know how to handle this, and it's scaring me.

Me! Scared of feelings I shouldn't be having in the first place but should at least be able to fucking control much better than I am right now.

Neither of us speaks again for a few minutes. My jaw is clenched so tight my teeth grind against each other loudly when I try to work it loose in my efforts to calm down. My hands are clenched tightly around my mug while the muscles in my arms twitch from the effort of locking them in place when all I want to do is use them to fight whatever is causing me to feel the way I do.

Chase remains just as silent as me. He eyes me just as hard as I'm eying him. While I see from his body posture he's just as tense as me, I also see more expression and emotions pass over his face than I'm capable of right now. He's much easier to read.

The first emotion seen was wariness when I first spoke. He hadn't been looking forward to this talk either and is probably unsure what my reaction would be. This isn't something that's come up in our eight years of friendship. We've never gone after the same girl or even almost gone after the same girl.

Our dating styles and taste in women are completely different. First of all, he actually dates while my hookups don't even make it to the full description of one-night stands. The women he gets involved with have personalities and he enjoys doing things that involve more than just sex. The girls I end up with aren't the type to want more than some dirty talk and I certainly am not looking for companionship.

This doesn't help me calm down, comparing the two of us, because it makes me realize that Kat is exactly the kind of girl Chase goes for.

The next emotions I can read in his expression are flashes so quick I would almost miss them had I even blinked. Anger and jealousy, which quickly turn to surprise and worry.

Finally, and probably the most unsettling one for me is an amused kind of acceptance twinkling in his blue eyes. His mouth relaxes into a lazy smirk as the tension seeps from his body then he chuckles before lifting his cup.

"It seems even her friends were wrong on their bets of when she would sneak out for training. She was in here not too long ago and said she was going to be heading to the training room to get started. Just thought I should give you a heads up." Then he gives a half shoulder shrug and winks at me.

I can only stare at him for a minute, stunned before I realize what just happened here. We've always had a way of talking to each other without actually speaking words, so I know by his posture, attitude and even the way he said things, that there's another message being conveyed to me.

While it might be a dick thing to do, and it might be the worst decision considering my position; I know I'm not going to back down either.

A good friend might.

A good friend might say to the other that neither of us should go after the girl. But I know my brother is stepping away by everything he didn't say, and I'm grateful as fuck for it. So, apparently, I'm far from a good friend because I'm gulping my coffee down and moving off after a nod in Chase's direction within seconds of processing all of this.

I deposit my cup into the return dishes area and stride out of the dining hall less than fifteen minutes from entering it. I make my way quickly to grab my things. My personal training sessions take place in the Leader's private training room and that's where I leave my bag of gear. It takes me a few minutes to get there and grab my stuff. I decide to get changed here as well while I think about things so far.

I know I'm about to cross the first of many lines this morning. Lines that a good leader would never risk crossing. I guess I'm just as much of a crappy leader as I am a friend because I have no intentions of backing off.

I realized something in the night.

Something that had me questioning motives that have driven me for so long. Questioning goals that I thought were my own, but now realize that maybe all along I've been working for someone else's goals while having none that belong to just me. I came to the disturbing realization that outside of work, there's nothing in my life.

I am the job and nothing else, and I'm tired of it.

I'm so fucking tired of giving everything to this faction and feeling empty as shit at the end of every damn night. Tired of never allowing myself to want anything for myself while giving everything I am in exchange. Tired of how I'm looked at and how I have allowed myself to be looked at by others.

I convinced myself that I didn't want or need any more than what those strangers I sought out could give me. That I got what I needed from them in those brief and impersonal encounters and it kept me satisfied.

I get all I could ever want from them with the added bonus of no strings attached, so what more could I ask for, right?

Wrong. It's all been empty as hell. Most of the time, it's just because I'm bored and they're there and easy. I can say no to them and more often than not, I do. That's about how it's gone for me. I could take it or leave it and it doesn't make any bit of difference in my life if I go without or not.

I'm just as empty as always. Until now. Until her.

I didn't know what real wanting was until now and I want Kat. I want to feel more of what I've gotten a taste of with her.

So fuck being the perfect leader because I'm getting what I want.

The section of the compound that the training room for transfers is in isn't very populated because it's further away from the main part of the compound. The intention wasn't to put so much physical distance between transfers and the rest of the faction, but that's what ended up happening.

Once upon a time, both classes used the same training room. Years ago both Dauntless-born and transfers trained mostly together. Then class sizes started to grow and there wasn't room in the other rooms used for training. They tried to schedule the classes so that one group was using the room while the other was doing something else outside of it, but that didn't work out and caused all kinds of issues that resulted in delays of stages and initiation completing. So the transfer training room was created from an abandoned area of the compound.

Dauntless is actually much bigger than what's currently used but so much of it is really rundown or so on the point of collapse that it isn't safe to move around in much less actually occupy.

It had taken a few years of fighting and pleading for leadership to even get the approval, funding, and assistance from Erudite to get the training room set up.

This was done just a few years before my transfer, but the process started well before that. I'm told that it was hell trying to shore up the hallways that led to the building that became the new training room and a few people were even lost during the process.

Dauntless is an entire section of buildings on the outskirts of the city that take up a couple of blocks. The exact location and all the entrances are known to only a select few. The buildings themselves are mainly shells because most of the compound is actually set underneath the buildings. Though at the heart of it, what we call the Pit, the buildings above that have been expanded into and outfitted to house the faction living needs.

I've looked up the record of why Dauntless wanted to live a cave-like existence and the records are shoddy, to say the least. The best Zach and I have been able to piece together is that Dauntless didn't actually make the place we call home. At some point in the city's history, when things started to go bad out in the world, there had been an effort to live or prepare for life underground.

They wanted to create a city-sized fallout shelter but hadn't fully completed the job.

Now we call it home and mostly, I love it, but sometimes it's a major pain the ass trying to deal with the day to day struggle of keeping a place like this running safely. That's saying something coming from our faction, that keeping up a level of safety that's acceptable to a Dauntless is a struggle.

'We do not believe in comfortable lives' is one of the phrases of our faction manifesto for fuck's sake. But there's a big difference between a comfortable life and just being able to live your life without having to risk breaking your fucking neck because you can't get the goddamn lights to stay on.

I glare at a section of lighting along the hallway that's completely burned out and mentally log it, adding it to the football fields worth of other tubing that needs to be replaced in various parts of the compound.

As I near the room I can already hear the sound of something going on in there. Once I reach the door, I just stand there off to the side of the entryway and watch her for a little bit.

The room is huge, being part of an old warehouse that we refitted for this purpose. The lights, all but the spotlights that run on their own switch from the main one, are off. Those spotlights are spaced out all over the room with no real pattern. There are few over bags or equipment, and some that hit over the indoor track used for running laps.

Kat apparently selected one of the spots that had one of these lights on and decided it was as good as place as any.

After the dreams I just experienced and feeling the desire for her I do, I was worried if I'm going to be able to control myself. I knew we would be alone in this room together. The chances that any of the other transfers would be up early at all, much less as early as she is, are slim to none. Leaving us the run of the room and more temptation than I'm sure I can handle.

Standing in the doorway, I'm surprised by how much control I'm able to maintain. Maybe because what I find has all of my attention in a way I didn't expect.

She knows some Dauntless forms, that's for sure, but she isn't concentrating on them. If she knows the Dauntless preferred forms that concentrate on the upper body she isn't using them for some reason. Her movements have a flow to them that lets me know this isn't her in here flailing around and hoping to be doing something right.

There's a structure and rhythm to her strikes and it's fairly mesmerizing as well as intriguing. The form looks to be made up of mainly martial arts with some Dauntless stances thrown in. If I had to place what kind of martial arts she's using, I would say Taekwondo. That seems to be consistent with what would work best for her build anyway.

Kat is petite and no matter if she was completely fit and in shape, she won't be able to put off much force behind a punch. Not to the level that any of the guys she's going to face will be able to. One punch from Kat is not as likely to do as much damage as a punch from one of the guys.

I wonder if she knows this and is going with that approach on purpose or is there another reason for her concentrating on this?

It drew me into the room and I watched her closely. Analyzing her as she would launch into a kick and trying to find any fault with it. She definitely has power behind the kicks and when they land they seem to be precise. Watching her do repeat strikes for the same area shows she has accuracy. Combined with the power behind the kicks that lets me know she's concentrated on this before.

As I get closer I keep a tight rein on myself, which is thankfully not as hard as I feared, but it's still a struggle. I work not to ogle or leer at her now that I can truly see her body for the first time. There's a stirring of desire in me when I see the way her chest is moving with her breathing or how tight her leggings mold to an ass that is way more shapely than it has any right to be.

Eyes up, Coulter.

Kat's in a dark grey V-neck shirt with black Capri leggings that have some mesh sections on the sides in a lighter color. The outfit is pretty modest for what most women here wear for working out, but it still allows me to see more of her muscle tone and definition and I'm pleased to see that there is real definition there.

I know both Amity and Abnegation have more duties that require physical effort than any other faction besides Dauntless, but you can never really tell what will come out of those factions. Not to mention that nutrition is a major factor of trying to maintain muscle and both of the factions suck ass in that respect.

Most Amity won't touch meat and Abnegation aren't allowed to touch most meats and have all these other strict guidelines for what they can or cannot eat. At least in Amity, they can have fatty foods and sweats which do help with calories at least. Abnegation gets none of that at all. They might as well be eating cardboard.

I frown deeply at this thought and wonder if maybe there would be a way to see where Kat is nutrition wise and make adjustments.

That'll lead to questions unless you want to do that for all the initiates so you don't rat yourself out. It might not be the best thing right now unless you can come up with another way to feed her on the sly.

"I hope that I'm not breaking some kind of rule by being here," Kat says, panting, just after she leaped up into a higher kick, landed it, then faced me.

I'm taken by surprise that she noticed I was near and that I was so caught up in my thoughts I didn't notice the change.

I shake my head, smirking as I move over to the side and drop my bag of gear near where I see a lone water bottle and her jacket sitting. "You aren't breaking a rule, just a standard. It's unusual for initiates to take…." I stop and shrug with the smirk still in place "...initiative and want to put in more time to their training."

Kat laughs as she slows her breathing, then moves over to pick up her water bottle to take a drink. She gets a few sips in before nodding and smiling at me. "Well, I can see with this group, at least, that's going to be the case." She shrugs and sets the bottle back on the ground before straightening back up. "I knew I was going to want to get in some extra time before and after the group, but I didn't count on being at it as early."

I frown and think back to my conversation with Chase. He said she was in the dining hall earlier, but he hadn't said anything about how long she was there. Actually, it sounded like it wasn't long at all. "How long have you been up and at training?"

She tilts her head and scrunches up her nose in thought before answering. She also looks frustrated before she lets out a sigh of that emotion and shrugs again. "I really need to get a watch!" She grumbles something under her breath before she continues. "But it's been a good while. I couldn't sleep." She walks back towards the bag, so she's facing away from me while she speaks. "All the excitement was keeping me awake and that wasn't helped by the fact that one of the guys was crying all night. I did try. I thought maybe I could wait and see if his tears would lull him to sleep, but it didn't happen."

She stops and turns to face the bag and looks at it with intensity. "There was no point lying there in the dark doing nothing and just waiting, so I put my time to good use. I got up then came here to do my warm-up stretches and my cardio sets. I noticed the lap area around the edge of the room so decided to do a run. I'm not sure how long that was but I know I got in fifteen laps. Then I went to get some water, ran into Chase and sat with him for a bit before I came here and now I'm back at it."

The structure and time management of all that she says with a shrug is impressive but it's hardly what I end up focusing on.

Exactly how fucking long was she with Chase and why didn't he say shit to me about it?

Then I realize how that sounds considering the fact that Chase took himself out of the running for Kat, and in doing so also let me know he approves of me going after her. As much as I know it makes me an asshole that I'm pissed at him about this, I can't help it.

"Letting someone else hinder your training and sleep is unacceptable." I snap, harsher than I intended, but I do mean everything I'm saying. "I expect you to let me know if he keeps that shit up. You need your sleep and we don't need to keep someone around that's crying every night for his mommy."

So much for the concerned tone I was going for.

Smooth, Coulter, you don't sound at all like an asshole.

I really did mean to soften it and be on the concerned side while still keeping it professional. I guess I'm so out of practice with expressing anything other than my normal that it's laughable. I wait for her to flinch or any change in demeanor that would suggest I frightened or disgusted her, but it never comes.

She nods to me respectfully and even gives me a small smile. "I was thinking of just buying some earplugs when I get my watch, but I'll keep that in mind. Thank you, Sir."

I pass over the desire to insist she calls me by my name and give her a curt nod back while motioning to the bag, stepping a little closer to her.

"Those were some interesting combos you were throwing out there. I noticed you aren't using your upper body. Is there a reason for that?" I cross my arms over my chest and let my eyes fall onto her arms and hands checking the condition of them for any injuries she might have that would prevent her from fighting.

"Yes, sir. Tape and gloves were a couple of the items I also forgot to get last night."

I frown and nod, then glance over to the area where the cabinets that hold all the equipment are. "While it's good to have those, I can tell you that what we'll use during training is a lot thinner than what you can buy. It might be better to either go without or get something closer to that. For now," I pause and wave her over to the cabinet with me. It takes a few seconds to get to that side of the room. "I'll pull a pair out for you. Did you always use them when training before?"

I search the cabinet for the smaller sizes and end up with a fingerless pair that have Velcro straps to adjust the size.

"Not always. Lynn suggested that I go without first to build up calluses on my knuckles to limit damage later. When sparring together she would bring some for me to wear but otherwise back at home I went without or if I could sneak in some tape, I used that.

I nod and hand her the gloves, feeling pleased when she takes a look at them but doesn't put them on right away. That lets me know she isn't afraid to bleed a little if necessary.

I clear my throat and step towards the bag again then wave her forward with a hand.

"Well, let's see how well you handle the bag now. I want to see the moves in your forms." I command her and note the change in my tone when addressing her.

Without anyone here, it comes damn close to being seductive.

She walks forward with an absent nod, but not before I see the slightest widening of her hazel eyes and the tiniest shiver of her body. She's ahead of me, so I allow a smirk to form on my face in response to her reaction to me.

Fuck, that pleases me to no end.

I want to push it further to see it again or how else she reacts to me, but I pull myself back. It would please me regardless of what I heard about her previous experience at lunch yesterday. They didn't go into detail or anything, but I got the impression that outside of an unwanted kiss she received once, she has no experience. What's even better to me, is that no one has ever interested her before. This was all information gathered when Mar was trying to talk to Kat, as quietly as she could, about maybe setting her up with one of the Dauntless-born guys.

A suggestion that was shot down quickly, thank fuck.

It did the job of letting me know Kat doesn't have the same aversion or thoughts about intimacy that other Abnegation do. Her reaction now wasn't obvious, it was small, but it was there, and it makes me feel better about my chances with her.

I watch her as she slowly moves through her forms. She starts out with the Dauntless standards and then moves on. There's still an emphasis on using moves centering around her core instead of her upper body, and it lets me know that she's tried to construct her style around it as well.

"You're starting out in the Dauntless stance to lure in your opponents. To try and make them go for certain moves and then you're switching," I state with an approving nod and appraising her critically as I circle her slowly while she's still moving.

I come to an abrupt halt when I see the slightest shift of posture, hinting at a move that she hasn't done yet before she stutters in her movements and hurriedly alters them.

Maybe if I hadn't seen how smooth and practiced she's been so far I would have written that small misstep off as her being untrained. But I have seen how smooth and controlled she can be and that small slip lets me know there's more that she isn't showing me.

She's hiding something.

I feel excitement rushing through me. Urging me to find out more. To find out if there is more to her and her capabilities. Another layer to her I can rip apart.

At that moment I realize something. It isn't enough for me to see she makes it through initiation anymore. I want to see how far she can go on period.

"Show me what else you know, Kat. Do not hold back. I'll know if you do." All traces of seductive undertones in the command are gone.

My decision has been made. I won't just be present here and there at her self-appointed training sessions. I don't care if I'm going to get shit for it, but I'll be at each and every one of them.

My thoughts are split along two lines in my justification for this.

Officially, I can say that someone needs to keep an eye on her and who better than me? I already have the order from Jeanine involving a Prior. I can say I'm just covering all the bases by keeping close tabs on Kat.

Unofficially, it isn't just about spending as much time with her as I can, but because I see something in her that excites me. Something I haven't felt about much of anything, but especially about someone in training. Between that and my desire to keep her here, I know I don't want to just make sure she stays, but that she's in the top ranked.

As the hour progresses, the initial worry that I might have to make future sessions an order fades. I'm no longer concerned that she might not want me around and be hesitant with my attention.

When I move closer to her, she doesn't shy back or away from me. When I go to make an adjustment to her stance and have to touch her to do this, she doesn't flinch or falter. If anything, she seems just as excited as I feel internally about our interaction. She looks at me for, not so much approval, but guidance from time to time.

She's even bold and confident, and when I was making a suggestion that she didn't fully agree with or wanted to know more about why I'm making the suggestion, she voices it. She is never disrespectful about it, but she isn't shy either. I can see the wheels turning in her mind that is driving her to ask these questions so that she can understand better.

It isn't all in a professional manner that she's responding to my touch, but the reactions are so subtle and innocent.

When they occur there is the faint trace of confusion in her expression or a slight halt in her otherwise sure movements. I know that she doesn't understand what is going on with herself, I can feel the frustration in her. So, while they are pleasurable to me, I determined to keep these incidents as few as I can considering our activity.

There comes a point where the bag isn't doing the job anymore. Especially when she started taking the information I'm giving her and adapting it to form new moves on the fly.

I was really starting to feel a little antsy at the lack of my own physical activity, so I moved us to light sparring and found myself having fun with an activity that's generally more habit than anything else to me now.

Never mind that I'm getting into very close quarters with her, I'm enjoying this for the spirit she puts into it. The little glint in her eyes and the smile on her face as she faces off against me.

"Careful," I warn her with no menace in my tone. "You might not like it if I decide to just take off the training gloves with you right here and now."

I've done just that with a few new members in my time. Some cocky young buck that came in thinking he could be disrespectful or challenge someone above him and not have to pay for it. I had no hesitation in teaching hard lessons and it wouldn't matter to me if that person had only been here for an hour much less months or years.

There's a reason I have the reputation that I do, but that isn't what this is with Kat as I give her the warning. Even if she has no real way of knowing if I'm being serious or not, she doesn't show an ounce of fear.

In fact, her eyes, green in color with gold flecks, seem to turn more golden in color. It's like watching fire catching in those eyes as her chin lifts just the tiniest amount. Her lips tilt and the wicked smile I saw the morning she pushed the Candor asshole from the train begins to spread across her face.

I shake my head in disbelief and go back at her but don't give her the full weight behind my hits. She retaliates by pulling a move that has me down on the mat, a smile on my face and a laugh escaping me before I can stop it.

This elfin looking girl had sprung into the air in a move that I can't even begin to describe but planned on getting Chase to see if it was caught on camera. The result is she has me on the ground and is perched on top of me, straddling my stomach with her knees tucked in tight to my body and squeezing.

She has an impish smirk while looking down at me as I laugh.

"What the hell was that?" I ask with my eyebrow lifted after I've stopped laughing.

She chuckles slightly, winded from our sparring and smiling widely. "I actually don't know what it is." She blushes at my expression because I don't believe that for a second. It was too well done. "I kind of dreamed of it once and I think I might have read about something like it somewhere. The image of it jumped in my mind just before and I just went with it. It felt right."

My watch goes off, stopping me from answering and causing me to think fast. The alarm means our time is up. Or it will be if I go with what usually happens about this time. I normally meet with Zach and Chase for breakfast before we start our official work day.

I know my options and I pick quickly.

I shake my head, smiling up at her and give her hips a gentle squeeze. "You're going to tell me more about how the hell you pulled that off, but later. We need to get you breakfast and I have to meet with Chase and Zach anyway."

My hands were on her hips without even knowing it. Kat only realizes this when I let her know with my gentle pressure. She blushes bright pink and springs up and off of me. Then she looks down at me, with a slightly shy smile and offers me her hand.

She's embarrassed about the contact and knows it was blurring the line of appropriate but isn't letting it get to her. She's pushing through her upbringing and inexperience.

Brave girl.

I chuckle and accept the hand but don't make her shoulder my weight as I rise up smoothly. When I'm up, I hesitate to let her hand drop from mine until I force myself to let go.

"What time is it?" Kat asks after moving over to grab her now empty water bottle and jacket from the ground.

I move over to grab my bag and look at my watch as I shoulder it. "It's forty-five past 0600 hours. I don't know what time you started but I can guess you've been going at it pretty hard for a while, not even counting what we were doing together." I stop and look at her sternly as I let my hand drop to hover just at the small of her back, propelling her to walk forward and hopefully not really giving her time to argue. "You also have a long day ahead of you too. Skipping meals won't be allowed if you want to keep up strength."

As she asked, I figured what she was worried about, and when I mentioned the time I could tell she was calculating. I know she's estimating the hours she's already been at training and how much time is left before the group training is scheduled.

That was something I had done myself when I was in her position. If it hadn't been for Zach, I probably would have done what I know she wants to do and keep at it. He let me a few times, letting me learn for myself the hard way just what that could do to me. Once I saw how hard those long days become when I made them even longer, I took his advice and relaxed where I could to allow my body to heal.

She looks up at me as we walk and nods with a small sigh. "I could probably use more food for energy if lunch is at the midway point. I did have a muffin, but Lynn was always going on about protein intake to me at school."

I let a smug smile take over my face as I reply with a simple nod to her. I would have to find a way to thank the Dauntless-born girl for making this easier on me, but that would come later. At least I know now that Kat's aware what's needed to keep her body strong and ready.

Maybe I can help that along every morning?

My hand presses slightly against her lower back as I alter the plan slightly. I had planned to go to the dining hall but that changes without real concious thought.

I didn't ask if she wants to come along to where I normally have breakfast with my friends, I just steer her in that direction.

I also hadn't thought if that was a particularly brilliant idea or not beforehand.

It isn't until I'm at the door and putting in my code that I look over at her. I see it dawning on her that this is my apartment. It isn't until I see it dawning on her what I've done without thinking things through, that it fully dawns on me too.

Her eyes are wide and I wait for her to react, bracing for the inevitable.