Key:
Flashback = Flashback (Obviously)
Dream = Dream
Time Passage = ...
- (BORDER) - = perspective change
Vision = Vision
Song/s: Happier by Marshmallow
Obligatory Note: Sorry that it's been such a long time since I last updated this story. I've been really busy for the past year with my college course and I'm going off to University this coming September so uploads are gonna become very far and few between. Not to mention that it's taken a lot of time to actually get ideas of where I wanted this chapter and those after it to go. I just hope that you guys enjoy it and I hope that I manage to update again sometime soon.
Also, POTENTIAL TRIGGER WARNING! Contains the theme of painkiller abuse/addiction
Chapter 34: Happier
"You have no idea how worried we've been about you. You nearly died and…is everything ok?"
I don't look at her. She betrayed me. What's to say she won't do so again? I shrug her hand off when she goes to comfort me, and a well-timed growl makes her back off quickly.
"If something happened to you whilst you were in the coma, you can tell me. You can't keep quiet about it; it'll do you more harm than good…"
"Just go away…"
I can feel her eyes boring into my back. Why won't she just leave me alone?
"Lion-O, the kids want to see their dad…"
"Well I don't want to see them!"
"Lion-O, be reasonable! They miss you…"
I sit up so quickly that my chest burns, and I cry out in pain as Cheetara rushes to me. "Careful!"
I swat her away irritably.
"You shipped me off to a psychiatric hospital! They fucking tortured me!"
"What the hell are you on about?"
"I wasn't in a coma! You all thought I was insane so you had me shipped off to the mental hospital and wouldn't do anything whilst I was there!"
"Lion-O, please, listen to me! Mumm-ra was messing with you whilst you were unconscious!"
She has tears streaming down her cheeks as I glare angrily at her, not believing a single thing that she's telling me.
"Get out."
"Lion-O…"
"GET OUT!"
She leaves quickly as I growl to myself, trying to soothe myself and still my pounding heart. Why does everyone think they can get away with lying to me? The tightness in my chest is excruciating, but I can't remember anything before this room.
It's been five days since I woke up in the infirmary and I've been in a 'foul mood' ever since. I haven't been able to take any of my medication due to the morphine and it's really showing in my behaviour; I've attacked medical aides, I've screamed at my own friends, I've lashed out at my own family. The guards positioned at my door have had to help restrain me multiple times.
"Lion-O, if you're going to continue to be violent against medical staff, I will be faced with no other option but to keep you under heavy sedation until you've healed enough to be put back on your medication."
I look at Pumyra as she walks in, carrying my dinner on a tray.
"I'm not hungry."
"Don't make me spoon-feed you because I will."
"You wouldn't dare! I'm in too much pain anyway…"
"You and your foul temper…Is your chest hurting again?"
I sigh as I lay back against the soft pillows, trying to relax as she checks the wound. "It's burning…"
"I'm not surprised…it's infected again…" she growls frustratedly, noting the development in my medical notes.
"More antibiotics?"
"Of course."
"Damn it…You know how sick I get; they tear my stomach up."
"I know but because we had to reopen that wound the other day, it puts you at risk for a very severe infection that could potentially kill you."
"Seriously?"
"Unfortunately…We'll get you started on antibiotic infusions with pills to take after every meal."
"That's overdoing it…"
"It'll be safe for you, but we'll be monitoring you very closely just to be sure. Take the pills after your dinner and I'll just get the infusion started now."
She attaches it to the IV and starts it, and I groan deeply as I lay back against the pillows. I hate this so much and I just want to leave everything for good. They all betrayed me, but even I can't even be a hundred percent certain that I experienced what I did today in reality.
I look at the plate of fish and vegetables along with some tapioca pudding and a glass of what looks to be piss-weak apple juice. How appetizing.
I take a mouthful of the fish but the taste makes me want to vomit, so I quickly spit it back out and shove the tray away. I can't stomach solid food yet, and I know I'll be back to being tube fed again. Great!
I lay back down against the pillows as I hear a small voice at the door.
"Daddy?"
I growl. "The hell do you want, you spoilt little brat?"
I hear Lola gasp at what I just said to her, but her courage pushes her to walk up to me.
"Daddy, I made you something. Do you wanna see?"
"I just want to go to sleep. Go and bother your brother for all I care. Just leave me alone!"
Her ears fall flat on her head as tears spring to her eyes and she starts crying. She's always been really soft – a little too soft if you ask me. She runs away as I close my eyes to take a nap, and it doesn't feel like five seconds pass before a sharp slap rouses me from my sleep.
"How dare you speak to your own daughter like that!? I understand that you've changed from the lack of medication but the way you're acting is forcing me to fall out of love with you! Your attitude is disgusting towards myself, our family and our friends!"
I growl as Cheetara rages at me for yelling at Lola, and I bite back with my own words.
"Well, maybe if you were to give a damn ever-so-often, you would actually understand how I feel but you don't! You're the one who betrayed me, not the other way around! Sometimes I wonder if this marriage is destined to end because if it is then I'll finally be able to not have to worry about what my spouse will plan next!"
"You were in a coma! How the fuck can I send you to a psychiatric hospital when you're unconscious for months with minimal brain activity? We thought you were dead!"
Her words begin to sink in as I hear her rage building to a boiling point. She's right – how could she have done it when I was unconscious the whole time? I sigh in defeat. Mumm-ra has messed with me like that before, back when Katzeran was just a cub.
"I'm sorry, Cheetara..."
"That's ok, but you need to talk to Katz and Lola..."
"I will do when I'm feeling up to it...I'm in a hell of a lot of pain right now..."
"I expect you are. Pumyra told me about the fact that they had to re-set your leg. I can understand why you're so damn grouchy."
I huff slightly, and then the morphine pump kicks in and I feel the pain ebb away.
"I thought you weren't able to have morphine because you got hooked on it after you broke your arm back on Third Earth?"
"That isn't real morphine – it's synthetic and designed for patients with previous...'dependencies'...on the real thing."
I look up as Pumyra re-enters the room, and she immediately sees that I haven't even touched my food. A look of sheer disappointment spreads across her face as she sits down.
"You need to eat, Lion-O…You haven't eaten since you woke up…"
"Only because I ain't hungry..."
"I know but you still need to eat something, even if it's just a little."
I sigh deeply then try to get out of bed, but I can't move my legs without roaring in pain. 'Tara and Pumyra rush to my side to help me, and even then, it hurts like absolute hell.
"You can't move, Lion-O! Those pins are holding your bones in place!"
I groan as they get me comfortable, tears streaming down my cheeks. This is so humiliating. I can't walk because of how damaged the bones in my legs are and Pumyra tells me that I have months of therapy ahead of me before I can walk perfectly fine again, and even after that, I'll be on crutches for a while.
"You could at least give me something to do! I'm bored as hell here and I hate just being able to either read or watch films or the news! Nobody is telling me anything of what's going on and I hate that too! I might be injured but I'm still your Lord and King!" I snap, growling deep in my throat out of sheer annoyance.
"Lion-O, you're relieved of your duties until you're healed. You just need to rest and get your strength back up. Tygra is handling everything for the time being..."
I groan and close my eyes to have a nap, trying to ignore the pain in my guts from the strong antibiotics that I was given. I drift in and out of sleep for what seems like forever – I have no idea how much time elapses but I am aware of my kids' voices as well as Cheetara's.
"Lola, you need to let Daddy sleep, sweetheart. He's very, very tired and very poorly too."
"But I want him to play with me! Why is Daddy sleeping so much anyway?"
"Because he's had some special medicine to help him feel better and to make him not feel any pain."
Lola quickly irritates me beyond belief and I can't stop myself when I harshly shove her away from me with a vicious, threatening growl. She immediately breaks down crying as I snarl, and the second I see the look on Cheetara's face, it kills me. She looks so disgusted that my heart drops straight into my stomach.
"Lola, sweetheart, go to the suite and play with Katz, ok? I need to have a word with daddy..."
She slinks off as the cheetah looks at me.
"You can't keep acting like that towards your own kids! They have feelings too, you know, and it's extremely unattractive..." she snarls darkly, and I can't look her in the eyes.
"I know I've been acting out of line recently and I'm sorry...I can't control it because I've not been on my medications for ages..."
"I've spoken with Pumyra and she says that, because you're completely off the anaesthesia now, you can go back on them as soon as possible. Hopefully they'll really curb those mood swings of yours."
I sigh deeply, hating myself for the way I've been acting recently. I've been an awful husband, and a seemingly borderline abusive father towards my cubs and I hate it so much. Cheetara places a cheese sandwich and some crackers in front of me and I pick at them half-heartedly, not really in the mood for this kind of food.
"What's wrong, honey?"
"I don't really want a sandwich...can't I have some soup or something instead?"
"I'll ask Snarf for you..." she says, and as she gets up to leave, I catch her scent and realise why she's been fairly pushy recently...she's in heat, and it makes me feel kinda guilty that I can't do anything to make it easier on her...
She returns about ten minutes later with some soup which I carefully eat, trying to ignore the burning desire within me brought on by my mate's scent. I wriggle slightly and get comfortable, and can't help but purr, blushing as Cheetara rubs my back.
"There have been a couple of things that have happened since you went into the coma."
"Oh really?"
"Yeah. We have a human settlement in the city which has been interesting because they've brought their technology from their worlds with them."
"What's a 'human'?"
She sighs. "I don't really know how best to describe them but they're a strange species...They walk on two legs like us and their anatomy is the same but they're furless and lack any discernible feline features, and they have their own wide array of languages that they speak too."
"They sound like the Warrior Maidens."
"I'm guessing that the Warrior Maidens are from the same species because they look the same. One of your doctors has been replaced with a human who is a Barbary specialist because he retired."
"I see."
We talk for quite a while, after which Pumyra brings me a dinner of steak and potatoes with a special treat which has always been one of my favourites – a warm cinnamon bun served with ice cream and fruit. I see a little paper cup filled with all my regular medications, and I let out a steady sigh.
"Finally, something gets back to normality." I say, eating my food before taking all the pills in one mouthful, "Hopefully, my attitude will do so too…"
Cheetara chuckles lightly before kissing my forehead and taking my plates away, and I take the quietness to my advantage by trying to take a nap. That seems to be all I do at the moment. Sleep, eat and complain bitterly. I mean, fair enough, I was severely injured when the Feliner crashed but the fact that I've been in almost constant pain since then doesn't exactly bode well for me...
...
Eight Months Later
"Come on, Dad. You can do it!"
I growl irritably as I shakily take a step unaided by the crutches. It feels ridiculously difficult, especially with the braces on my legs and elbows still. The sensation of the pressure being put on my healing bones causes me discomfort but I push myself on; I'm not the kind of person who gives into defeat. I force myself on, growling with each step.
I look up and see Cheetara encouraging me to keep going as I growl even louder. Being on my feet unaided again for the first time in months is a strange sensation.
"Bend those knees, Your Majesty. It's the best way for your bones to get their strength back again."
I do so and almost fall over, giving a sharp roar of shock and pain as I gain my footing again, forcing myself on.
"My King, you can take a break if you..."
"I'm fine! I don't care that it hurts like a bitch, I'm going to do it!" I snap in Barbary, knowing fully that the physical therapist doesn't understand a single word I'm saying.
"Sire, is something bothering you?"
"Yeah! Every step I take is pure agony in my lower back!" I growl, trying to keep myself standing as my snarls grow in volume. I see the look of worry on Pumyra's face as she glances at Tygra. "What is it?" I ask, and so she groans slightly.
"It's possible that, because of you being in so much pain, that a small fragment of your spine could have broken off and be compressing your spinal cord, which would explain the pain and numbness."
I hear Cheetara gasp, and I growl as I sit myself down in the wheelchair that Pumyra had pushed over to me. I feel her fingers running through my mane to calm me down, and her soft purring helps tons too.
"It just means that it will be a bit longer before we can take the braces off of you."
"I kinda figured." I grunt as I sit back against the material of the chair, "How soon can you do the surgery?"
"We can get you in later today and it should be relatively quick, depending on how severe the injury is."
"I'm fine by that. The sooner it happens, the sooner I'll be able to sleep at night without having to take a crap-ton of morphine…" I grumble, and I'm taken back to the infirmary to have a pre-op check.
I sigh as I lay back on the sofa wearing nothing but a pair of boxer briefs, revelling in the silence since the cubs are at school and Cheetara has gone shopping. I glance out of the window and see the golden sunshine pouring in through the open glass. It's such a beautiful day today, but I decided to stay home. I still have the back and leg braces on but they're different models now as they're designed to encourage the remaining breakages to heal.
I sit back up again as I hear my phone ringing, and I grab it before staring at it in confusion. Human technology isn't as complicated as our own yet I can barely operate this damned contraption without Katzeran's help. I press a button and take the call, seeing that it's Panthro.
"Hey, I hope I didn't wake you from your cat nap, Lion-O but you're needed in the control room."
"Why?"
"Because the King of Plun-Darr has requested to speak to you and I told him that you would be able to."
"Did he say what it was that he needed?"
"Something about a disturbing discovery in one of the villages surrounding the capital city."
"Ok, I'll be right there."
I quickly get some clothes thrown on before making my way down to the Control Room where I see the King of Plun-Darr on the telescreen. The Wolfman smiles warmly at me as I take a seat in front of the screen.
"King Lion-O K'al'iviryix, it is a pleasure to be speaking with you again, I just wish it were under better circumstances. I understand that your people – the Barbary Lions of Thundera – are facing extinction due to dwindling numbers?"
I sigh sadly. "Yes, I'm afraid that would be true. My Clan has less than 100 individuals alive. I take it that the reason why you have called me today is because of an issue regarding some of my Clan mates?"
"Yes, Your Majesty, I'm afraid so; authorities in the village where everything took place found the bodies and fur of many Barbaries and other Thunderians that were to be illegally sold on the black market as food and clothing."
I feel the colour drain from my face as I hear the news, knowing that it could mean I'd be forced to declare war on Plun-Darr if it got out to the public. I feel the Barbary powers trying to surface but I force them back down with a heaved sigh. This is really bad news for my people. We've been hunted for centuries because of the events that happened when my ancestors, Satos and Jansh'r were around.
"Which brings me to the main point of why I have contacted you today. Your Majesty, I request for you and my son Sebastian to travel to Plun-Darr. Maybe if the perpetrators of this heinous crime know that you intend to punish them for their actions then maybe they'll stop. There have been many unnecessary deaths."
"I know. I'll consult with my friends and family tonight and I will be able to travel tomorrow."
He nods and ends the call but, before Panthro and Tygra can ask me about anything else, I get up and limp back to the Royal suite. I'm still healing and my legs still hurt from time-to-time but I should be able to manage the trip. I can walk unaided by crutches but only for a short while.
I lay down on the bed and stare at the ceiling for a couple of minutes before I hear what sounds like Cheetara's phone ringing. I roll over onto her side of the bed and pick it up, wondering why she left it behind when she went out for the day. I'm just about to roll back onto my side but then I notice something inside the drawer underneath the different items; a light brown envelope.
Curiosity gets the better of me so I pull it out and slide the letter out of it, only to feel a literal punch in the gut when I see the letters clear as day at the top of the page;
SEPARATION AGREEMENT
My hands shaking, I try to slip the letter back into the envelope but I can barely see through the streams of tears cascading down my cheeks as I choke on my sobs of heartbreak. How? Why? All sorts of thoughts are racing round in my head as I try to make sense of this sudden surprise. How long has she had this paperwork?
I struggle to keep myself calm as I lay on my side. She's done well to keep it a secret for so long but the date is from eight months ago so I guess she got it when I was being a major jackass after waking from the coma. I groan slightly and get back up again. I can't settle down right now and it's annoying. I suppose I really should be packing my bags to get ready for the trip later today but I don't really feel like going now. Especially considering what I've just found.
Maybe if I just act like I never found it, then maybe it'll…
"Lion-O, we're home! Well, kids, go sit down at the table and do your homework, okay?"
I freeze when I hear Cheetara's voice in the entrance to the suite. I look down at the envelope in my hands; I can't just ignore the issue and pray to the Gods that it resolves itself. I'm just going to have to man up and talk to her about it. But how can I tell her that I found it? It would mean telling her that I looked in her drawer.
I look up then and see her, standing in the doorway staring at me.
- (BORDER) -
I look at Lion-O as he stares at me like a deer caught in the headlights, paperwork in hand and my phone in the other with tears streaming down his cheeks and a look of horror and betrayal on his face, and I can't help but become fairly angry at the young lion.
"Lion-O, why were you going through my drawer?"
He cringes. Hard.
"I…I wasn't, love. I just saw the paperwork because you left it open…"
"You should know betterthan to look through other people's personal things," I say softly as I sit down next to him and I can feel the disbelief radiating from him.
"I…I'm s…sorry…" he stutters lamely, his fur puffing up fully as he trembles, his body trying to make itself look threatening. I sigh deeply, and I can hear him sniffling dismally.
"Why did you file for the paperwork?" he asks, and I hear the waver in his voice.
"It doesn't matter now because it was from months ago. Look, I still love you with all my heart and nothing is ever going to change that. You're still my husband. My soulmate. And so, My King…" I say as I pluck it from his hands and put it aside before making sure the door of our bedroom is locked. He's looking everywhere but at me so I gently push him back down against his pillows as I slip my hand down the back of his jeans and boxers. "Has Pumyra cleared you to be able to mate again?"
He nods gently but squirms when I nibble at the skin of the joint of his shoulder to his neck whilst trying to work his shirt off. He turns away when I go to kiss him and I immediately know that he isn't feeling up to anything.
"What's wrong?"
He sighs again and sits up. "I'm not really feeling it right now, 'Tara. I've got to go to Plun-Darr tonight and I have to get my bags packed to go."
I sit up too and look at him as he runs a hand through his thick, luscious mane.
"I'm guessing there's a dire situation there then?"
The lion nods as I rest my chin on his shoulder, wrapping my arms around his broad chest. "There have been Thunderians killed on Plun-Darr."
I gasp in shock upon hearing that news. I can understand why he's stressed about this because, as King, he has to now spend a few days on Plun-Darr to attend meetings with their council and, since the crash, he's had a phobia of travelling anywhere in any kind of flying vehicle.
"Will you be able to cope with the journey though? We all know how the crash affected you mentally."
He looks up at me. "I don't really know, 'Tara. Pumyra says that she'll give me some Xanax for the flight if I need it."
"Won't that react with the Prozac that you're already on?"
"Pumyra told me that they might make me quite drowsy but that means that I'll probably just sleep for the whole journey and, well, that's what I tend to do anyway."
He lays back on the bed again, looking extremely tired but that's not a surprise given that he was still asleep when I left this morning. "I need to decide on whether I will go or not and, to be honest, I don't really want to because I know I'll have to go alone."
"Why alone?"
"Because everyone will be busy with their duties. You've got your Queenly duties and we were supposed to have gone to visit your family in the Cheetah Clan Lands."
"We can reschedule for –"
"No. We've been planning this trip for months and I don't want you to miss out just because I have to go off-planet."
"But I know what you're like. You'll be really nervous about the journey."
"I'll just have to try and overcome it which is easier said than done but I'm a grown man, and it's about time I started acting like it…"
He looks me in the eyes and grins impishly before pulling me down on top of him.
"Something tells me that you're feeling better already…" I chuckle, trying to keep as straight a face as I can as he nuzzles my neck with his nose.
"I want you…I want you so badly…" he whispers as he lays me on my back as he purrs happily. It's been over a year since the last time we had any intimacy and I can tell that it's sorely needed.
"Are you sure you're healed enough for this?" I ask as he pulls his shirt off over his head, and my hand automatically goes to the horrific scar on his chest just above his heart; a cruel reminder of how I had almost been robbed of my lion by our oldest enemies. He groans slightly as he adjusts the back brace to fit him better. I help him then, and I can't help but let my eyes wander further south. It's been far too long.
"Maybe…you should be the one…y'know…on your back?" I say, blushing beneath my fur as he too chuckles gently.
"Now that's kinky." He teases, sitting back against his pillows as he wriggles out of his jeans, swearing in Barbary.
"Hey, take it easy, love. Don't hurt yourself…" I say gently as I carefully ease his jeans down, revealing the heavy scarring on his legs. The crash really did a number on him, both physically and mentally. I precariously slip his leg braces off so that I can get the jeans off fully, and put them back on once he's settled down, eyes closed.
"Hey!"
He opens an eye.
"Don't you even think about falling asleep until after I'm done with you!"
He chuckles yet again and quietly says "I'm sorry but you know how sleepy my medication makes me..." However, he stops with a gasp then growls as I straddle him.
"Just tell me if anything starts hurting again, ok?"
He nods, grabbing fistfuls of the bedding as he growls desperately. "You have no…no idea of how much I've missed this…"
I smile and gently force him to lay down completely, pinning his hands above his head. "I know. I love you, Lion-O…"
He grins again and growls suddenly, as if in pain. I get off him like a shot and throw my robe on then, not knowing whether to call for Pumyra or not.
"What's wrong?"
"Something is pinching in my back…" he growls, stretching his back with a horrifyingly loud pop, "I think it's best that we give it a miss right now, 'Tara…"
"Alright, but don't go in front of the kids until you've 'calmed down' so-to-speak…" I tease, and he hurriedly covers his area with the blanket as he blushes. I laugh and nuzzle his throat as I purr before kissing him. He's just so perfect and I feel so happy that he's finally by my side again.
"Have a nap if you need it, Lion-O. It's not like you slept very well last night; you were still awake at half two." I say as I run my fingers through his mane and thick fur. He purrs softly then as he smiles at me and pushes himself up but his smile quickly turns to a grimace.
"Do you need me to go and get Pumyra or…"
"No! No, I'm fine!" he says quickly, cutting me off before I get the chance to finish what I'm saying.
"But it's quite obvious that you're in pain…"
He hesitates then for a moment, quietly growling as I help him get dressed again.
"Come on you, I'm taking you to the medbay."
I help him get up as he growls, and I know something isn't quite right.
"Are you absolutely certainly sure that you're going to be able to travel to Plun-Darr?"
"I'm sure, and I don't need to go to the Medbay; I feel fine. The tramadol is just starting to wear off."
"When are you due for your next dosage?"
"I'll take it with dinner…" he says as I help him sit down on the sofa. He watches as I check on the cubs to make sure they're doing their homework before going to the kitchenette and turning the kettle on. "If you tell me what you need packing for tomorrow and I'll do it for you."
"No, no, I can do it. I'll get it sorted after dinner." He says, "I just want to have a bath first…"
I nod slightly before giving him a cup of hot tea. "Here, I'll go and run the bath for you." I say, and he smiles at me again.
"You don't have to, 'Tara. I can do it myself; you've been on your feet all day."
"I know, but I need to keep an eye on you because I know you're still healing. The last thing I need is for you to fall over and break one of your legs again."
- (BORDER) -
I growl slightly as I stare at the wall of the bathroom, the hot water making my pain ebb away slowly. So many things are going round in my head that I haven't been able to stop thinking about for months. Every day, Mumm-Ra's words bother me and have done ever since I was in the coma. What had his warnings meant? "'At the moment when you finally realise that your life was meaningless, I will destroy you…'? What had he meant by that?" I mumble to myself as I lay back against the side of the tub, submerging my aching body fully into the soothing water up to my nose.
I dunk my head under, ignoring the burning of the chlorine in my eyes. This feels so good.
When I sit back up, I grab the bottle of shampoo and conditioner and empty a considerable amount onto my mane. I really don't want to go tomorrow but I know that I have to. I just hate the fact that I'll have to go alone. I haven't really ever gone anywhere by myself before in that way and, honestly, the very thought scares me.
I rinse my mane out and clean myself before laying back again and closing my eyes. I can feel my medication getting to work because I'm slowly getting drowsy again. I'd better get out of here before I fall asleep again; I fell asleep in the bath last week and woke up because I breathed in a mouthful of water.
I go to push myself up but I can't; I can't move my arms. I feel my heart pounding in my chest as I slip further into the tub. Damn it, this can't be happening! I try to yell for Cheetara, but I can't make a sound.
"And this is how it ends…the lord of the cats drowns in the bathtub…how ironic considering the fact that cats hate water…"
I look up and see Mumm-Ra standing above me, glaring down at me with a look of pure scorn and malice on his grotesque face. What is he doing here? I try even harder to move, uncomfortable with him seeing me in such a vulnerable position.
"I hope that this is a painful demise for you, Thundercat. It's no more than you deserve for what you've done for me through the years…"
I start to panic as I feel like multiple pairs of hands are grabbing hold of me, forcing me further under the water as I try to hold my breath for as long as I can. Maybe he'll get bored eventually? Or Cheetara's gonna see him.
"Holding your breath isn't going to help you, Lion-O. You're going to have to breathe again some time soon…"
Saying that, my lungs are starting to ache. But I can't give in. I force myself to move and grab hold of his arm, trying to pull myself up.
"Get off me, you sadistic son of a bitch!" I snap in Barbary, accidentally inhaling water as my head is forced under again. I fight as hard as I can but I'm rapidly tiring because of those damn pills, always making me drowsy and weak. I pull myself up again.
"Sword of Omens!" I begin to shout, but Mumm-Ra grabs me by the throat this time and squeezes hard, shoving me back down again as I give a strangled roar of pain and shock. I'm weakening, and fast too. Damn it! I roar and gouge his wrists, making him release me but then something hits me hard around my head as I feel everything go…weird…
My vision is fuzzy but I can just make it out when Mumm-Ra looks over his shoulder in sheer panic before quickly disappearing, seconds before I see Cheetara's beautiful face above me. I can't hear her but I can feel it when she pulls me up by my shoulders, screaming at Katz to go and find Pumyra.
She somehow manages to drag me out onto the floor which is a literal miracle in itself seeing as how I weigh at least twice what she does.
"For Jaga's sake, Lion-O! You can't keep falling asleep in random places! You could have drowned!" I hear her saying as she looks down at me.
"I'm…but…he was here…Mumm-Ra…"
She looks worried about this.
"Lion-O, there's no way that he could have been in here because I would be able to sense him. And I've called for Pumyra. I just want to make sure that you have no water in your lungs."
The puma comes in then and checks me over before determining that I'm fine, and so Cheetara helps me to our bedroom, aids me with getting dressed, and we all head downstairs for dinner.
...
"Katzeran! Where are you?"
"Dad! Help me!"
I look around, only to find myself in the exploding death trap of the Feliner. The stench of fuel is overwhelmingly strong. A sudden explosion rips through the air and I feel the horrifying sensation of pure agony, and I look down at myself just in time to see the meter long shard of metal that cuts deep into my chest accompanied by a literal explosion of blood as it severs arteries and tears through my body.
"Dad! Oh my God!"
I look up to see Katzeran standing in front of me, covered in my blood.
"Katz…help me…" I gag, choking on the blood that spurts out of my mouth.
Suddenly, I feel the most horrific pain that I've ever felt as the metal shard is torn from my body, cutting through my bones and flesh as I roar in shock, watching in horror as Mumm-Ra impales my son through the neck, jamming the shard into the metal of the Feliner.
"KATZERAN!"
Mum-Ra turns to me, an evil gleam in his eyes.
"I wouldn't worry about him, cub, because you have even bigger problems coming your way…"
I see the blood that's coming from my wounds slowly turning into what looks like black sludge that has the foulest smell.
"What do you mean…?" I growl as I try to ignore the spreading numbness in my body.
"I'm not through with you or Leo yet…can you feel the numbness spreading through your body?"
I growl as I fall to my knees, trying desperately to keep myself upright as the sludgy blood spills out of my wounds and covers the floor. The loss of sensation is slowly becoming alarming but I can't let him know that I'm starting to worry about it.
"Your bloodline is tainted with evil, Thundercat. Nobody is ever truly good because everyone has just that little bit of evil in their hearts. And I know that because I saw it first hand thanks to one of your distant great grandfathers…You're going to become just like Jansh'r, cub, and there's nothing that you can do to stop it from happening. It is inevitable."
He kicks me in the chest, sending me sprawling out on my back as I gasp for air. It's getting colder and it's starting to feel harder to breathe…
I glare up at him with a snarl. This doesn't look great for me.
I look down and see that I'm still bleeding heavily from the wound in my chest, and although I don't know how, it seems to be…melting through the metal of the floor.
I reach for the Sword, but before I can even grab the hilt, I feel the sudden pain of a sharp blade cutting through my skin as Mumm-Ra slashes me across the face with a hidden dagger.
"You will one day bear the mark of your ancestors, cub. The Ancient Ones have predicted your birth since the beginning of time…even though the origin of your name is lost to time, I know what it means…"
I snarl angrily, tearing the Sword from the Claw Shield and holding it in front of me, pointing the tip at the mummy.
"Nobody aside from my own Clan and the Thundercats know about that!"
He grabs a handful of my mane and forces me to look into his eyes.
"You forget that I know your secrets, Barbary lion…"
He forcefully tears my shirt off, revealing the darker spots on my shoulders that stand out against the caramel-tawny colour of my fur. I growl even louder, squirming uncomfortably. I hate this.
"Your bloodline will end with you, L'ûencho Vaenaz T'zavir K'al'iviryix."
I can't help but roar in fury at hearing the demonic priest utter my full name in perfect Barbary, a language that someone like him shouldn't even know.
"I can feel your confusion, Thundercat. I know what your Mother was and I know that you're only as powerful as you are because of her."
He's right. I am confused because I don't even know what he's talking about now. I feel my powers surging through my veins, making me glow ever-so-slightly. I've never felt them so strongly before.
"Your mother was a sorceress. She was the daughter of the high priestess of the Village and your father fell hard for her. Understandable too, as she was very attractive or so what the Ancient Spirits tell me."
"What's the point in telling me any of this!? You're wasting time if you're planning to kill me!" I spit, and so he grins at me.
"Oh, I'm not going to kill you… I prefer to have a bit of fun with my victims first…"
He rams the blade of the dagger into my throat with one swift motion…
I sit up so quickly that I let out a loud growl of pain before grabbing the bottle of Tramadol off my bedside table and taking another dose of four pills. When are these damn nightmares going to end? I look down and see that Cheetara is still asleep, which is honestly surprising considering the fact that I must have been screaming.
I slip out of bed, pulling my boxers on before grabbing my pyjama bottoms on. I'm not sleeping at night like I should be and so I decide that the best way for me to be able to fall back to sleep is to go and actually do something; a walk or something like that.
I open the door and go into the living area of the suite, looking round at everything. I hate how dark it looks at night; my medication sometimes makes me see things that aren't there.
I carry on until I'm at the top of the staircase, sighing as I sit at the top of the steps. I can't stand the panic I feel at the thoughts going round in my head…I've been tormented ever since I woke up and I can't sleep at night.
I groan and yawn deeply, feeling cold despite the central heating being on. As I turn to go back to the suite, I see a flash of darkness before something shoves me in the chest, sending me reeling backwards as a shocked roar escapes my throat, echoing through the silent corridors as I fall backwards.
I feel every step of the stairs as my head smashes against them, my eyes screwed shut tightly, trying to focus on not letting myself get hurt.
"DADDY!"
I hear Lola screaming, and I realise that my roar must have woken her.
Before anything registers, I'm being picked up by my throat and I hear Lola screaming in pain as she's picked up by her tail…
My eyes open slightly as I roll over, disorientated as I see Cheetara curled up on her side, lightly purring in her sleep as she cuddles Lola to her chest. I go to push myself up, but a dull ache in my back and chest decides to make itself known. My knees feel stiff too, but I force myself to my feet and make my way to the bathroom, closing the door to and switching the light on.
I immediately see how tired I look, which is weird because I've been sleeping really well recently. I run a hand through the thick fur on my chin, staring at the bottle of Tramadol on the shelf beside the mirror.
I neck a double dose because of how bad my muscles hurt and then see the bruising on my arms and chest. I think nothing of it as I take a swig of water from the taps, before I hear Lola's distressed squeaks as she has a dream.
I quickly go through into the room and swiftly pick the cub up in my arms as 'Tara wakes up, alarmed by our daughter's cries.
"Lola, it's ok…it's ok, Daddy's got you…Daddy's got you…" I soothe, gently rubbing her back as she wakes with a start and begins crying and chirping. She clings to me as I sit down on the bed, nuzzling my chest as she sobs.
"Daddy, it…it was so scary…there…there was…was so much blood and Uncle Leo…Uncle Leo was bad…badly hurt…"
I sigh deeply. She's fairly close to Leo and her cousins, despite the age gap. I sigh deeply and hold the cub against my chest as she sobs, her tail curling up slightly as I stroke her mane.
"I know how you feel, Lola… I worry about your uncle too. But he's okay and I promise you that."
She snuggles into my chest as she purrs gently before yawning.
"You'd better try to get back to sleep, little one. You're tired and you have school tomorrow."
She quickly falls back to sleep so I take her back to her room and tuck her into bed with her pink plush rabbit. I smile slightly as I look down at my sleeping cub. She's growing up so quickly. I turn the light off and go back to mine and 'Tara's room where the cheetah is waiting for me.
I sit next to her on the bed as she cuddles into me.
"I love you so much, Lion-O…"
I take her in my arms and nuzzle her mane with my nose, inhaling her sweet scent. I gently trace her spine with a claw as she shivers, purring lustily. I chuckle lightly and lay down on my back with my wife atop me, straddling my stomach.
"It's half four in the morning and we'll be up again in an hour and a half. How about we have some fun before then, eh?"
She chuckles, before squealing when I roll us both over before turning out the lights…
...
24 Hours Later
"Welcome to Plun-Darr, Your Majesties."
I look behind me at Sebastian – the Wolfman is wearing his coronet to show who he is – the Crown Prince of Plun-Darr. He smiles at me and we start to walk through the grand entrance of the Palace, and I feel the multitudes of eyes watching me as I follow the pair of wolves.
I catch a glimpse of a young female reptilian Plun-Darrian out of the corner of my eyes, and the look on her face is enough to tell me about the fact that, despite the alliance between our planets which has been standing ever since Lola was born, the Plun-Darrians aren't all in agreement with it. I remember seeing a Barbary pelt on the floor the first time I visited.
I turn to Sebastian and the Wolfman looks back at me. "You're not nervous are you, Lion-O? You've done this kind of thing before."
I sigh when he asks me this, feeling embarrassed about what he's just pointed out.
"I am nervous, but only just a bit. I mean, this is the first time that I've gone off-world without Cheetara and I don't like it…"
He claps a friendly hand on my back but I can't help but flinch at the sensation. All of my senses are on high alert and I feel really uncomfortable. Oh, why did I agree to come here? This was a terrible idea…
I'm led to the throne room where armed Wolfmen open the doors and we walk in to see the stunning carved stone arches and green and black drapes emblazoned with the sigil of the Plun-Darrian Royal Family. Upon the throne dressed in the finest chirra furs sits King Volke, who smiles warmly upon seeing myself and his son.
"Liulf'r, my son, you look amazing. And you, King L'ûencho K'al'iviryix, it is an honour to finally be able to meet you in person at last. I hope that your journey was comfortable. May I ask, where is the Queen? I was under the impression that her Majesty was going to be travelling with you."
I sigh deeply before saying "That would have been preferable, Your Majesty, but my wife and cubs are in the Cheetah Clan lands, visiting their grandparents."
"Ah, I see."
I awkwardly stand there, listening to Sebastian, or Liulf'r as his Plun-Darrian name is, talk to his Father about how his life has been on New Thundera for the past twelve years. I miss my family. The bond that I have with Cheetara isn't working fully due to the distance between us but I know that this is only going to be temporary. I just dread having to sleep tonight. Cheetara was in the throes of heat when I left and the pent-up sexual frustration is driving me insane.
I hear hushed whispers behind me, and when I turn around, I see a pair of guards – one jackal and one wolf – pointing at me and chuckling.
"He smells like a female cat in heat. Looks like he can't keep her happy no matter how hard he tries…"
"I bet he's really unhappy about being so far away from her…"
"Fucking pussy…Look at him, he's a mess…How embarrassed about yourself must you be to turn up somewhere important looking like absolute shit? He looks so damn scruffy, it's ridiculous."
"He's gained so much weight. That's disgusting…"
I feel my face turning bright red as the humiliation washes over me. I always take pride on my appearance and to know that they think I look scruffy is, honestly, a bit of an insult.
I dither there uncomfortably, willing the ground to open up beneath me and swallow me down. I hate this. I hate this so much; I want to go home. But I can't. I can't even begin to think about going home until after we've had the meeting and, judging from how people are reacting to me, it isn't going to go very well.
"Are you ok, Lion-O?"
I snap back to my senses when I hear Sebastian talking to me. I turn around and see him looking at me worriedly, a friendly hand gently resting on my shoulder. I shrug him off.
"You've never been like this before, what's going on? Do you need me to call Cheetara?"
"No, I'm fine! I'm just…I'm just overdue my medication… I also feel a bit sick too…long journeys tend to make me feel sick…"
"Ok. Well, there's still some time yet before the meeting so why don't you go to your room to get some rest?"
I agree with the Wolfman, because not only do I feel sick but I can feel the pain in my legs starting up again – a sign of the pain medication wearing off.
I'm taken to my room where my bags are waiting for me on the bed. I start to unpack, carefully folding my clothes to put them away, and then I get to my little tub of medication. I sit on the bed and open it, only to feel like my heart stops entirely when I see that the Tramadol is missing.
Shit! No, this can't be happening! It just can't! I tear through everything that I packed in desperate attempt to locate the pain medication but my search is futile. This is bullshit! I must have left them on my bedside table…
I growl in pure frustration and anger as I rake my claws through my thick mane. If I want more, chances are that they're going to have to examine me and I really don't want to have to do that. I throw myself down onto the bed and roar into the pillow in fury. Damn it! I don't even have my antidepressants! How in the ever-loving fuck am I going to put up with this?!
I hear the mobile phone that I was given by a human ringing, but I don't answer it. Don't see why I should. I'm probably going to need to see if I can find a way to get some more painkillers from the MedBay because I doubt very much that I'm gonna make it through the next few days without a steady supply. As for the antidepressants, I reckon that I'm going to manage a few days without being on them.
The phone rings again so I pick it up and answer it.
"Hey Da-"
"Listen here, you little shit! I don't care what it is that you have to say because I have far more important things to worry about right now! You're such a disappointment and your performance in school is stupid! Now leave me alone!"
I hang up before Katzeran can get a word in, and I feel the guilt hit me moments later. I probably should actually be worried about not having my antidepressants with me…
I groan as I sit back up again. Tonight isn't going to be easy…
...
"Tonight, we dine on the finest and freshest produce in celebration of your acquaintance, King L'ûencho. We hope that you enjoy it."
I stare down at the plate of food in front of me. It smells and looks good but I have no idea what it is. I poke it with my knife and am shocked to see that it looks like steak but the juices are a blueish colour.
I politely take a bite, only to freeze in shock at the weird flavour of the meat. It tastes kinda salty and has a very strong hint of earthy flavour, and my brain immediately tells me that I don't like it. As discreetly as I can, I spit the meat out into a napkin and decide to eat everything around it, but everything has that same flavour.
I can't stomach it so I excuse myself and sit there politely listening to the conversations as my stomach growls. I'm so hungry but I don't want to risk anything that could potentially make me sick because deviating from the Barbary diet for even just a few days will make me quite ill.
"Are you ok, Lion-O? You seem to be spaced out?"
I look Sebastian in the eyes over the table, and he looks genuinely concerned.
"Yes, I'm ok. It's been a long day so far and I tend to tire quickly nowadays…"
"I know, but it's not like you to skip a meal. If you want, I can ask for something else to be made for you?"
I sigh and cave in despite not feeling hungry, and eagerly dive into the new steak which is brought out to me that looks like one of the ones that I'm used to and, to be honest, it's probably the best steak I've ever had. I just don't really wanna go to the council meeting tonight. That is NOT going to be fun.
- (BORDER) -
I sigh deeply as I stand on the balcony in the coolness of the summer evening, looking out over the Valley of the Cheetahs. I can hear the crickets chirping as the slight breeze whips my mane around my head. I'm still in complete disbelief and disgust about earlier. Katzeran only needed to ask for help with his homework and Lion-O completely cut him off and spouted all kinds of abusive bullshit at our son. I can't believe that he's acting like this, it's really not like him to do so; he's changed again recently and I really don't like that.
I decide to call it a night, locking the door behind me before making my way over to the bathroom where something grabs my attention. I turn the light on and see Lion-O's pill bottles on the shelf in the medicine cabinet. That isn't right, he was supposed to take those with him. I guess he must have forgotten them. I make a mental note to ask to have them shipped to Plun-Darr for my husband, but upon grabbing the bottle of Tramadol, I realise that the bottle is surprisingly light considering the fact that it's a practically new prescription.
Curious, I open it and tip the remaining pills out, and it turns out that the bottle is worryingly empty. As for his antidepressants, the bottle is untouched. Damn it! I've had my suspicions about this for quite a while yet but I never actually felt brave enough to confront my mate over it. I'm going to go to see Pumyra and Tygra about it tomorrow; it's quite obvious that Lion-O is abusing his painkillers.
However, if he is – which is quite obvious that he is – then it really does explain why he's behaving the way he is. It also means that he's going to have to go through a rehab program, which I know he is going to absolutely despise. I just wonder what he's doing right now…
"Mum?"
I turn and see Katzeran stood in the doorway. My young son looks tired and kinda disturbed by something. I leave the bathroom and sit down on my bed and the litah kitten follows me.
"What's wrong, Katz? You're supposed to be in bed - it's almost midnight and you've got a long day tomorrow."
The youngster sighs, looking ahead blankly.
"I think Dad's in danger."
The severely serious tone of his voice takes me by surprise. He looks really scared and that actually scares me in turn.
"What makes you think that? He's safe on Plun-Darr."
"I know Mum, but I've got a bad feeling in my gut that something bad is going to happen to him…"
"Look, I know that you were scared when your Father had to go but that crash was over a year ago. I understand that the memory of it is always gonna haunt you but everything is gonna be fine with your Dad."
"But you don't know that for sure, Mum!"
I sigh again, just thankful that he isn't throwing a tantrum like Lola had earlier when I'd tried to get her to go to bed. Both kids are really missing their Father and he's only been away for a day.
"I know when your Father is in danger, Katz. He and I have a very special bond and I'd be able to sense if something were amiss. Now you go and get yourself back into bed, you look knackered."
"I don't want to go back to bed, Mum! I can't sleep! I'm worried about Dad!"
"Would it make you feel any better if I were to call him?"
"Kinda, I guess…"
I grab my phone and dial Lion-O's number, but he doesn't even pick up. That's weird, he never doesn't pick up his phone when it rings. I try again, with the same results. Why isn't he picking up? I turn to look at my son; he's yawning and knuckling his eyes.
"Sorry Katz. Come on, you go off to bed now."
He does so begrudgingly, and I get myself into bed. It feels strange to be in bed without the soothing presence of my husband by my side. I'm not really used to it despite him having been in the coma for the majority of last year. He'd missed his birthday, the kids' birthdays, our anniversary…
I just can't believe that he's actually still alive. He got so lucky with the crash because that metal shard that pierced his chest was literally mere inches from puncturing his heart. Not to mention that his heart actually stopped twice during the surgery.
I sigh as I curl up on my side, feeling incredibly lonely. I don't like having to sleep without Lion-O. I find it hard to settle down, and the fact that I can't actually reach him through the bond is worrying and it actually hurts me.
I close my eyes and eventually find myself drifting into sleep, but with slight discomfort in my guts which is strange…
- (BORDER) -
"So what was it that you wanted to do about it, Your Majesty?"
I look up again and see the whole room starting at me, which is unnerving. I gulp, only because I wasn't actually listening to what it was that they were talking about. I glance back down at the table for a moment, before saying "I…I don't know…"
"Well, there's got to be at least something that you want to do? We all know how critically endangered Thunderian Barbary lions are and how illegal it is to butcher one, let alone sell their fur or meat."
"I know, I know. I've had to deal with this before on my own planet, and it doesn't get any easier to handle because my Clan is still feared and hated to this very day. On New Thundera, the perpetrators are arrested and imprisoned, even sent to the Penal Planet if their crimes against my people are severe enough."
"You say it's still an ongoing problem on your planet?"
"Yes; hunters are still taking Barbary lions from the Village and ruthlessly slaughtering them."
The discussion carries on for hours, at which point I'm actually feigning interest in the conversation. I'm just so damn tired that I want to go to bed. I almost fall asleep at the table a few times, but relief comes when the meeting is disbanded because of the lateness.
I go to bed immediately upon entering my room. The sheets are soft and inviting, and I carefully move the phials of liquid morphine that I got to underneath my bed.
Laying down feels like heaven, and I can't even keep my eyes open. I snuggle up in the thick blankets, purring contentedly. It feels so good and, even though I don't have my mate with me, I quickly begin to dose off…
I wake with a start when I feel my stomach lurch painfully. I try to sit myself upright but I can't even move my arms, let alone my legs. I open my eyes and can't help but roar in agony as I violently bring up the contents of my stomach, which startlingly looks like blood.
My stomach lurches again, the agonising spasms bringing tears to my eyes. God, it hurts so much! I try to control my breathing, but it comes in ragged gasps as my insides run hot and cold. I've never felt this kind of pain before…
I realise then that I'm bathed in sweat, the sheets are drenched to the point where they feel like water has just been poured onto them…
I throw up again, frightened out of my wits when it's streaked with startlingly bright red blood, the same colour as what's soaked my pillows. What the hell is going on with me?! I heave and gasp for breath again, bringing up nothing but blood. The pain I feel is indescribable; it feels like I'm having my insides torn out of my body…
"Well, it looksss like it's doing it'sss job nicely, yesss?"
I feel myself go cold when I hear that voice. Slithe walks into my field of view, grinning at me as I lay there, shaking uncontrollably.
"Look at yourssself, Thundercat…That poissson isss working well to dessstroy your body."
Poison? Oh God, no! No wonder I'm in so much pain…but why can't I move?
"That Atroxin really is doing a number on him, Slithe! It really is keeping him from moving!"
"Yesss, Jackalman…Now get me that bag! We need to get him out of here before anybody findsss him…"
I yowl as my aching body is roughly dragged out of the bed and onto the floor, but I'm powerless to stop them from shoving me into what looks like a black body bag. This can't be happening! Why isn't the Sword protecting me?
I'm lifted up and dropped onto a hard metal surface, pain exploding behind my eyes as my head strikes it hardest. I can't breathe… I can't breathe…Oh God, I can't breathe! They're suffocating me in this bag!
Tears stream down my cheeks as I start to realise the severity of my situation; I'm never going to see Cheetara again…never gonna see the kids…my friends…nobody…
Am I going to die today, alone and afraid?
To Be Continued