First mate's log:

January 21, 1974

Oh wow, the Skipper is getting married! I know, I thought he was a bachelor for life. But he really loves Joyce and she loves him. He proposed to her and she accepted. The thing is, neither of them wants a big wedding, or even a simple one like Mary Ann and I had. They're going to elope!

No one's supposed to know but me and Mary Ann. (Yeah, I'm glad I have you to confide in.) He's worried that Mrs. Howell would try to make a big production out of it. And both he and Joyce just aren't that big on weddings, although they want to marry each other.

The plan is that he'll have his crew manage the ferry without him this weekend, since he hardly ever takes time off. I offered to help them, but he wants me and Mary Ann as witnesses.

"Even with a little wedding, I need my little buddy as my best man."

I was really touched of course. Mary Ann will be matron of honor, even though she and Joyce aren't that close. Mary Ann is still excited about the wedding, informal as it is, just a civil ceremony on Blenford. She wishes she could at least tell Ginger, but she's promised not to. At least we don't have to keep this secret as long as we did the one about her pregnancy.

(I know I don't write much about that, but so far it hasn't made a big difference in our everyday lives. She's about four months along now and has gained a little weight, but she's still my Mary Ann.)

The Skipper has his own little boat, The Sardine, and he'll take the three of us over to Blenford Saturday night, since Joyce lives over there, and then the four of us will come back Sunday afternoon. (The Skipper has booked two rooms at a nice but not fancy hotel on Blenford.) We need someone to look after the Pizza Parlor, especially Saturday evening, because that's one of our busiest times. Mary Ann doesn't want to ask Kalani, who needs to spend time with her kids on weekends. (Kalani's mom watches them when Kalani is working.) But Mary Ann said she'll figure out something, without blowing the secret.

Carol Brady's diary:

January 22, 1974

My goodness, Alice is going to elope with Sam! Well, all right, I don't know for sure, since it's not like she told me. But Marcia and Jan overheard a very interesting phone conversation.

They swear they weren't eavesdropping. This isn't like the time that Peter was tape-recording private conversations. (And, yes, that looks very different to me now, given what we've since learned about President Nixon. I try not to talk about politics, even in here, but I do wonder sometimes about the extent of his corruption.)

Anyway, my daughters claim that they went into the family room after school, while Alice was on the phone in the kitchen, with her back to them. They definitely heard the words "elope" and "elopement." And Alice said she'd be happy to give up her bowling date for something like this. The girls admitted she didn't actually say Sam's name, or any endearment, but who else could she be talking to?

Mike is skeptical, and I'll admit it does feel a little odd that Sam would ask over the phone rather than in person. I would just ask Alice, but the girls said that when they said hello to Alice after she hung up, she claimed she was excited about her bowling date with Sam Saturday night. Clearly, she doesn't want anyone to know. I don't know why, because we all love Sam and would be thrilled to help them plan a wedding. But maybe Sam doesn't want all that pomp and ceremony, and maybe he thinks an elopement is more romantic.

Meanwhile, Bobby is learning to play the organ. Mike and I well remember the experience of him learning the drums. We don't want the family to suffer by having him practice in the family room. So we've agreed that he can play it in the garage at certain hours. And we gave the Dittmeyers and other near neighbors a warning about it. You know I like to encourage the children in their various hobbies and interests, but considering the damage Jan recently did with a baton, I am trying to put limits when necessary.

January 23, 1974

Mary Ann called Alice yesterday and asked her to look after the Pizza Parlor, at least Saturday night. Alice has a bowling date with Sam that night, but she thinks Sam would understand. Yeah, Mary Ann told Alice the reason, swearing her to secrecy. Well, she said Alice could tell Sam if she has to, but not the Bradys. Hopefully both Alice and Sam can keep the secret for a few days. Obviously, it's OK if people find out afterwards. Yeah, it's hard for me not to say anything to the Bradys, especially Peter, since I see him at work.

Alice is happy for the Skipper and Joyce of course, although Mary Ann did say she made one of her jokes about being a spinster. I don't know why Sam hasn't proposed to her yet, after all these years, but obviously I can't judge. It took me a very long time to propose to Mary Ann, and you know all the reasons why. And I don't know, maybe Sam is just happier being single, as the Skipper was for a very long time.

January 24, 1974

I tried hinting to Alice about elopements, but she played dumb and said that as far as she knows, Marcia isn't even going steady. (Marcia actually hasn't dated at all since the double whammy of Jeff and Jerry. But that's probably for the best for awhile. And, yes, she's too young to get married, although some girls her age do.)

I wish Alice would confide in me, but nonetheless we're going to do what we can for her and Sam. Sam actually called Mike about it, sort of. He didn't confess about the elopement, but he did tell Mike that a friend of his is getting married soon and is looking for a local starter house for newlyweds. I know, Mike is an architect, not a realtor, but of course he does know about all the construction on our little island.

It's starting to sink in that Alice would be moving out. I don't think she's planning on quitting her job, because she would've told us by now, like the times she did quit. However, she obviously would no longer be a live-in maid. That would be an adjustment, but the kids are all getting older, even my "babies," and I suppose we could manage. The thing is, I would miss her as a person even more. I realize I'll still see her every day, but that won't be the same as living with her.

Still, I of course want her to live her own life, just like someday my children will find spouses and have families of their own. Not that I expect her and Sam to have children, but you never know. She could have a change-of-life baby I suppose. But anyway, she and Sam will be their own little family.

As for what we're doing for her, Mike and I agreed to offer her all of next week off. She and Sam deserve a real honeymoon, even if he can't close up the butcher shop for long. (Greg is willing to run it a few hours a week, although he's busy with school and his extra-curriculars and hobbies.) We of course can't tell Alice why we're offering her a vacation, not until she tells us the truth. But I doubt she'd say no to a week-long vacation in any case, especially since she rarely takes any time off.

I want to throw a little reception for her and Sam when they get back from "bowling," but the timing is tricky of course. And we'll have to hide the refreshments and decorations somewhere that Alice won't find them, without giving away to anyone else that she's eloping. I assume that if she's keeping it a secret from us, she won't want the Howells and others to know. The plan is that the decorations will go in a trunk in the attic, while I'll buy the food after Sam comes to pick up Alice for "bowling."

Oh, and Bobby has agreed to learn the wedding march on the organ. He's actually not half bad, but hopefully he'll improve by Saturday night.