Captain's log, stardate 85053.3.

I was told to dock at Starbase One. They acknowledged my eagerness to serve, but said that it was a very bad thing for me, zipping between assignments that quickly. I was therefore on shore leave on Starbase One, until further notice. They promised that my crew would all still be here when I am approved to move back out.

I had never had time to kill before. In the Academy I was always studying in my free time. Then I was involved in running my ship. I considered returning to the holodeck, but I couldn't think of anything I needed to brush up on.

I contacted my parents back home on Trill. They still did not want to speak to me after I told my father, who comes from a long lineage of joined Trills, that I did not want a joining. They kicked me out of their house after that. But that is a story for another time. Many of my crewmates were off at the pub boozing, a popular activity among Starfleet crews. As captain, it was my duty to not compromise myself in the fashion that often happens after too much alcohol is ingested.

Resigned to have no one to enjoy shore leave with, I asked one of the maintenance men on Starbase One what he would recommend for a solo activity. He said I should go to the station's holodeck; there are far many more programs on it than would be on a starship's. Something will undoubtably tickle my fancy. Unconvinced, I went to the base's holodeck and started paging through the holoprograms. There were so many that they had to be stored in separate files. Children's programs. Adult programs. Programs for people who want to relax. Programs for people who do not want to relax. And the largest file of all, Holonovels.

Out of curiosity I began to browse the children's file. I was looking for something safe, simple, and fun. Aha! There it is. Disneyland 2020. A popular series, especially with very young children. My mother sometimes used that program when I was a child. And I understand that it can be scaled to be appropriate for a "grown-up" audience. I selected it. The computer asked my age; I provided it. The computer then asked if I want to go as a character. I was never asked this question before, possibly because I was so young. I said yes, not quite knowing what I was getting into. The computer then produced a list of characters on the arch screen for me to choose from. They were all very elaborate designs. Some of the characters I recognized, like Mickey Mouse. Others I didn't. The list was very long. I asked the computer what exactly I was choosing. A character costume will be replicated for use within the Disneyland program. I asked why. Disneyland simulation includes feature of costumed characters like these. Yep, I remember them. Program author desired for selection to exist. Interesting. I said that I didn't want any, and the program started.

Disneyland was quite different than how I remembered it as a child. After a few hours I decided that it really wasn't very interesting anymore. Over the next few weeks, I tried countless holonovels, both children's and regular. Some of them I only gave a few hours. Some I tried I played through more of their narratives, usually until I completed the program. Keep in mind I was spending ten-hour days in the holodeck, with a break for lunch, of course.

Pokémon was a children's game listed as a program that never ends, which was interesting; it was in both the children's and all-ages files, but was flagged for subject material. I read the warning. Game mechanics require certain physical movements. I looked at these. Game mechanics require safety routines to be on at all times. Not like I would ever try it otherwise. Game features are described as follows… and then there was more than fifty screens of material, very densely written, with multiple calculators. I found it incomprehensible. I asked the computer what exactly I would be using all these rules and algorithms for. The computer explained the concept of the "Pokémon battle." This game was apparently only slightly intellectually rigorous to complete, but some of the optional features required intensive work to obtain. Interesting, but far too much work. I passed on that one.

As the days dragged on, I was getting more and more fed up with what the computer had to provide — or didn't provide. I had run so many different programs that they were all beginning to feel the same. I eventually realized that a good chunk of the appeal of being in the holodeck was the interaction with the environment, and with the other characters. To be honest, I had never conceived of that. I had only ever used the holodeck at the Academy to run programs that are designed to be completed as quickly as possible, and thought that all programs were designed that way. Eventually I decided to run through one of the programs as slowly as possible, knowing that on the holodeck there is no deadline, even if the plot says there would be one. I decided to run Dr. Hippocrates Noah, an espionage thriller. I had already completed that one, so I would know what was going to happen next. I had clothes replicated so I would fit into the story better, and then walked in not knowing how I was going to feel afterwards. It was exhilarating.

When I exited the holodeck for the final time, having completed it again, Admiral Beckett was there waiting for me. After a rather sheepish introduction, given I was wearing a low-cut dress, he told me that I had passed the personality test they were running on me with flying colors. My psych review revealed that I was far too headstrong and quick to be a good captain. I had all the skills and plenty of motivation — I just needed to learn to slow down. Admiral Beckett had circulated a memo around the starbase prior to our arrival, that Captain Arlene should be redirected to the holodeck as quickly as possible. I would apparently be kept there until I learned to slow down while in fictional simulations so I would be out of my element as a captain. Now that I had finally done so, he was happy to reinstate me to my ship and give me new orders.

As a note, Admiral Beckett noticed that I looked at that Pokémon program. He said that it's a good thing I didn't choose it, as it was extremely addictive. He plays that game, and has to pull himself away from that holodeck when running it on so he can get to bed and back to duty.

Computer, end recording.