Chapter twenty eight: Time goes by
The forest was completely covered in snow. Lori and Slobodan were lying in the snow behind a large stone, in the middle of the mountain forest. Slobodan taught Lori to hunt. Lori had her K31 carbine with her, which she held with the magazine loaded but the bolt open. Slobodan was to her left with his Zastava M70.
"Tell me. What do you usually hunt here?" Lori asked.
"Good question. If luck, I shot deer. Is meat for one month if you know how to make it. But normally Bunny."
"I don't want to kill Bunnies."
"You said you want food. And you use big bullet. Make it easy. Bullets big, and bunny head explode."
Lori looked shocked at Slobodan.
"What?"
"Is better when head explode. When head explode, not cut off later with knife."
Lori started feeling sick.
"I might throw up."
"You eat meat?"
"Normally yes."
"That part getting meat. Now hold gun and look for Bunny and deer."
The two waited for a long time. At some point they saw a Snow Bunny.
"There Bunny. Point gun on." Slobodan said, and pointed his Zastava on the bunny.
"You make gun on Bunny."
"I'm not sure if I can do that."
"You said you make wrong decision. You ever kill?"
Lori looked at her K31.
"Yes. One time."
"What animal?"
"No. It was a man."
"Hmmm. Then don't do like little girl. Kill bunny is easy."
Lori pointed her K31 at the bunny. The Bunny looked at a pinecone. Lori slowly aimed at his head, and pressed the trigger to the hard firing point. She gave a little bit more pressure, it banged, and the bunny flew two meters away while rotating.
"Good. Bunny away."
Slobodan stood up and walked to the bunny. He lifted it up, holding it on his paw.
"Good hit. Bunny head exploded. He doesn't know what happened to him."
He took a jute sack he had over his shoulder, and put the bunny in this sack. Slobodan made a movement with his head that told Lori that they were moving on. They walked through the forest for a few minutes and lay down under a mighty Nordmann fir tree. After more than an hour, the two saw something moving. Slobodan looked through binoculars and saw another snowbunny under a pine tree.
"Bunny." Slobodan said and pointed his Zastava at it.
He shot, and both stood up. He went to the tree, and took the second bunny in his sack.
"So. Now I teach how to slaughter bunny." Slobodan said.
"Oh my god..." Lori said.
"You learn, and you make food forever."
They started walking to Slobodan's hut. Both entered the hut, put their rifles next to the door, and Slobodan took the bunnies out of the sack and put them on a table. The next thing he got was a big Bayonet. Lori looked with wide eyes nervously at the Bunnies, the bayonet, and at Slobodan. Slobodan shook his head.
"Bunny dead. Not feeling pain."
Slobodan took a Bunny and the Bayonet, and started carefully cutting the skin with the fur off the bunny.
"When enough bunny, I show you making clothes."
Lori gulped nervously. Slobodan separated the fur from the flesh, and cleaned the skin of the remaining flesh. He then hung the fur on the chimney pipe, and gave Lori the Bayonet.
"Your turn."
Lori took the Bayonet and nervously started to cut the skin off of the bunny. Slobodan watched her and didn't say a single word. When Lori was finished, Slobodan made a gesture with his hand.
"Now clean skin."
Lori cleaned the remaining flesh of the skin. Slobodan took the fur and looked at it.
"Clean cut. Good work. Now dry fur to make clothes."
Slobodan hung it on the chimney pipe.
"Now potato bunny soup."
"Is that what we eat next?"
"Da."
"Okay. Good that I know that Da means yes in Serbian."
Slobodan took his bayonet again, cut the bunnies open, and removed their guts. Lori looked away and got a pot. Slobodan threw the bunnies in, with five potatoes, and with water. He put the put on his furnace and lit a fire.
"Now play cards while bunny cooks."
"Okay."
Lori said and sat down. Slobodan got some playing cards, and went to the table. He sat on his chair on the opposite side of the table. He laid down the cards, mixed them, and equally gave him an Lori some.
"Turn music." Slobodan said and pointed to a radio.
Lori went to the radio, and pressed the play button. A table started playing. The melody began playing and the moment Lori sat down, the singer started singing.
"Да ли је то истина или се само шалиш
На Балкану хоћеш ватру да запалиш
Да ли је то истина или се само шалиш
На Балкану хоћеш ватру да запалиш"
(Is that true or are you just kidding
You want to light a fire in the Balkans
Is that true or are you just kidding
You want to light a fire in the Balkans)
Lori and Slobodan started playing.
"Пријатељу стари из прошлога рата
Ставићеш и себи омчу око врата
Са Србима не смије инат да се тера
Изгубићеш јато црних бомбардера
Са Србима не смије инат да се тера
Изгубићеш јато црних бомардера"
(Old friend from the last war
You will also put a noose around your neck
With the Serbs, spite must not be forced
You will lose a flock of black bombers
With the Serbs, spite must not be forced
You will lose a flock of black bombers)
"A good song." Lori said.
"Is Rodoljub Vulović. Good serbian singer." Slobodan said.
"Храбра је љепа моја земља мала
Вјековима понос ником' није дала
Храбра је љепа моја земља мала
Вјековима понос ником' није дала"
(My small country is brave and beautiful
She has not given pride to anyone for centuries
My small country is brave and beautiful
She has not given pride to anyone for centuries)
They started playing cards. Lori wasn't really experienced with cards.
"Пријатељу стари из прошлога рата
Ставићеш и себи омчу око врата
Са Србима не смије инат да се тера
Изгубићеш јато црних бомбардера
Са Србима не смије инат да се тера
Изгубићеш јато црних бомбардера"
(Old friend from the last war
You will also put a noose around your neck
With the Serbs, spite must not be forced
You will lose a flock of black bombers
With the Serbs, spite must not be forced
You will lose a flock of black bombers)
"You good."
"Thank you."
"То што мислиш другоме пожели и себи
Да те клева судбине никад стигла неби
То што мислиш другоме пожели и себи
Да те клева судбине никад стигла неби"
(Wish for yourself what you think of others
If the blasphemy of fate never reached you
Wish for yourself what you think of others
If the blasphemy of fate never reached you)
Lori started to like the music. It was actually good.
"Пријатељу стари из прошлога рата
Ставићеш и себи омчу око врата
Са Србима не смије инат да се тера
Изгубићеш јато црних бомбардера
Са Србима не смије инат да се тера
Изгубићеш јато црних бомбардера"
(Old friend from the last war
You will also put a noose around your neck
With the Serbs, spite must not be forced
You will lose a flock of black bombers
With the Serbs, spite must not be forced
You will lose a flock of black bombers)
The song became quieter and quieter, and the radio started playing the next song from the tape. Lori noticed the potato and meat smell in the air of the hut.
"It smells good." Lori said.
"Needs cooking more. Bunny meat raw."
They kept on playing with the cards. After twenty minutes, Slobodan took out a Bunny with his bayonet. Lori put a metal plate on the table, Slobodan put the bunny on the plate, then hit it with his Bayonet. The bunny was cut into two pieces. Lori twitched.
"Here. Eat." Slobodan said.
Lori took the bayonet, and started eating the bunny with it, while Slobodan took the other part and ate it with bare hands. The bunny tasted not great, but it was not bad.
"There is no salt. That's missing." Lori said.
"Here no salt. Enough mineral in food to survive."
They kept eating. After they ate the first bunny, Slobodan took the second bunny and shared it with Lori. After they finished it, they noticed that outside was a blizzard.
"It's snowing again." Lori said.
"Да. Maybe you stuck in hut next days."
"I better go home. See you Slobodan."
"Здраво."
Lori took her Karabiner 31, and left the hut of Slobodan. She entered her hut, and walked past her Mercedes. She opened the door and walked in the living room of her hut. She closed the door and threw wood into the furnace. Lori sat on her chair and started watching the fire. She started thinking.
"What a Strange man." Lori said while watching the fire.
"But so friendly at the same time. Like an uncle."
Lori looked at the wood that wasn't burning.
"Did these wars make him like this? This country that broke?"
Lori kept looking at the fire and sometimes she looked through the window behind her, seeing the snow falling from the sky.
One month later:
December was in two days. Lori sat in her chair, reading a book to learn Serbian. Slobodan gave her this book a week ago, when the snow was on a level again, that made it possible to visit each other. Next to the book he gave Lori two Deer legs. Lori put them in the barn, where they are safely and stored in a frozen state. While Lori was waiting for a good moment to make the legs to a meal, she had to kill the time. And why don't use this time to learn a new language, the language Slobodan speaks.
"Здраво. Ја сам Лори."
(Hello my name is Lori.)
"Имам седамнаест година и волим музику."
(I'm seventeen and like music.)
Lori stood up, and walked to the window. The hut Slobodan lived in was barely visible. But she saw a light blinking from his hut. A slowly blinking light from a flashlight. They agreed that this means, "are you alright?" Lori took a flashlight, and made three light shots to Slobodans hut, signaling that she was alright. Slobodan answered this with one slow light impulse, a long one, and again a short. Lori signaled to him that she goes again. She walked back and sat on her chair again. She started rubbing her belly.
"You will hate me that I brought you in this life… I can't argue against that… I'll be a horrible mother, raising a child in the middle of the mountains, without any other people, or anything else that children need…"
Four months later:
Lori sat with bare feet on the grass in front of the hut. The snow melted, and Lori enjoyed the warm spring sunshine. She heard something knocking from the other side of the valley. Slobodan was outside, without a shirt, and was hammering two meter tall Phone poles in the ground with the hammer side of an axe. Lori started watching it. Two hours later, he hammered the last pole in the ground, next to Lori's barn.
"Hey Slobodan. What's this stuff for?"
Slobodan turned to her, and looked at her belly.
"You will be a mother soon. I lay a military phone between my and your house. If you need anything, you can call me."
Lori spoke to Slobodan in Serbian.
"Хвала Слободане."
(Thanks Slobodan.)
Slobodan closed his eyes. He seemed to feel something painful.
"Молим те... Не можеш да умреш, Живане."
(Please... You can't die, Zivana.)
Slobodan left. Even though he felt something painful, Lori felt warm. Slobodan makes a phone line with a military phone, so he can help her.
"Thank you Slobodan!" Lori yelled to him, as he jumped over the creek.
Slobodan started installing cables on the phone poles. As he finished, he came to Lori with an ancient military field phone.
"Wow." Lori said surprised.
"You meet to lift up the telephone receiver, and it will ring at my hut. You need help, I will help you. You are bored, we can talk, you want to listen music, I play my radio and you can listen on the phone."
Slobodan hugged Lori back.
"You are welcome."
He broke the hug and installed the wiring for the phone into Loris living room, and finished it. After that, he gave Lori another hug, and left. Ten minutes later, the military phone rang. Lori took the receiver.
"Hello?" Lori asked.
"Phone working." Slobodan said.
"Slobodan… the moment we already talk, I have to tell you something."
"What?"
"Back then, six months ago, I left my home town forever. And, because I was involved in a shooting. And I killed five men."
"That all?"
"What do you mean by, that's all?"
"Back in Bosnia, we had fun setting houses on fire. With people in it."
"Oh my god… But I did even kill, I was also involved stealing highly radio… I mean, highly regulated substances. And I was becoming from a good girl to a really bad woman."
"Bosnia made me a bad person."
"Slobodan, I don't actually have the name Jane."
"So?"
"My name… Is Lori."
"Лори… Занимљиво."
(Lori… Interesting.)
"Yes it is interesting."
"We did our things with support from people of Srbija."
"Yes… I think it's the best when we stop talking for this moment."
"Да. Здраво."
"Здраво Слободан." Lori said, and hung up.
Memories went through Loris head. Being on a playground, playing with her father. Getting read a good night story by her mother. Feeling safe.
"I've lost so much." Lori whispered.
Another memory went through Loris mind. It was back then, when prom night was, when she worked in an arcade and bistro, and she was forced to work, because she gave Lincoln free stuff for a friend. She already thought she would miss the Prom night with Bobby. But Lincoln made an agreement with her boss so she was still able to go to the prom.
"Lincoln… you little angel… what have I done to you…"
Other memories started going through her head.
"Lily…" Lori started crying, and sat in the chair in the living room. She remembered that she often had to bring Lily to bed. Singing good night songs, and watching her falling asleep was something beautiful.
"Lily… Lily won't even remember me."
Lori looked at the floor.
"She won't even remember me because I left so early in her life."
Lori looked at her belly, and held her hand on it.
"I wonder if you would be anything like Lily. Even the smallest part of Lily is wonderful."
Lori started stroking her belly.
"I won't ever leave you… Lorraine."
Lori considered. Why was she so sure that her baby was a girl.
"Why am I so sure that you are a girl? Strange."
Two months later:
Lori was sitting in her chair. Serbian music was playing on the military phone. She was reading again in the Book to learn Serbian. In this moment, the special phone she got from agent smith rang. Lori was surprised.
"What? I didn't even charge it."
She took it and typed on the green phone button. A distorted, female computer voice spoke.
"Attention: Jane Schroeder: Please go to the village: Silvercreek, Montana: location: Jacks dirty tavern: 5 p.m. Repeat: Attention: Jane Schroeder: Please go to the village: Silvercreek, Montana: location: Jacks dirty tavern: 5 p.m. End!"
"Unbelievable." Lori said frustrated.
"That was more than half a year. How can Agent Smith have such a patience? Terrible."
Lori went to the bathroom, went to the toilet, washed her hands, and then walked into the barn, where she opened the door. She drove her Mercedes out, closed the door, and went down the valley and over the mountains, until she reached the village of silvercreek. She turned into a street, and parked in front of Jacks Dirty Tavern. Lori got out, and entered the tavern. It was a dark tavern wich smelled of beer and cigarettes.
"What do I have to do now?" Lori asked.
"Hey. What do you want to drink?" Someone said.
Behind the bar was a bartender, that had a bushy mustache that made him look like Josef Stalin.
"Oh, nothing. I don't even have money with me. I just wait for someone."
"You become a mother, right?"
"Yes?"
"Then everything non alcoholic is free."
"Can I have a chocolate milk?" Lori asked.
"Sure."
Lori went to a table at a window and sat down. Lori got her chocolate milk. Half an hour later, agent smith entered the tavern.
"A beer please." Smith said, and sat down at the table where Lori was sitting.
"Good to see you Jane."
"Hello."
"I just saw, you will become a mother?"
"Yes."
"From your boyfriend Roberto Santiago?"
Lori nodded. Tears formed in her eyes.
"I see. I am here because of two things."
"What two things?"
"Your former friend Carol Pringrey made a photo. See for yourself."
Agent smith held a phone to Lori, on wich a photo of Lori was seen. She was covering behind the trailer of her car, shooting her STGW 57. The photo showed the giant Muzzle flash, and the cartridge that was ejected.
"This photo was the photo of the year in 2022. Some buildings in Royal Woods have graffiti of this picture on their walls."
"Wow." Lori said surprised and sad at the same.
"And then your mother."
"What is with my mom?"
"Three months ago she had a stroke. She recovered, but she still has problems with speaking and walking."
"Oh my god…" Lori said frightened.
The meeting went on. Agent smith started telling all with more details.
Lori thought about Rita and Carol, as she drove again to her hut.
"Are they really okay? Carol… I lost Carol as a friend. And mom… I am fault for her stroke. Fault that she has problems speaking and walking."
Lori reached her hut an hour later. She got out, opened the barn door, and heard a gunshot in the far distance of the valley.
"He's hunting again. I hope he hits the bunnies at the right point. Last month exploded the whole bunny because he aimed that bad."
Lori said, and went back to her car. She parked it in the barn, closed the door, and went in her Living Room, where she sat in her chair again. The Military Phone still played Serbian music, wich was broadcasted from Slobodans radio.
"I should spend time with uncle Slobodan again. The hunting last month was kinda fun. Even though we didn't catch much."
Lori didn't think that she would hunt that day again. But at the evening, she stood in the forest behind a tan tree, with Slobodan laying on the ground next to her with his Zastava. Lori held her Karabiner 31, and looked in the direction Slobodan was aiming.
"What do we hunt now?" Lori asked.
"Boars. They have been active for some days. Was year ago since I ate last boar. If I remember correctly." Slobodan said.
Lori started feeling uncomfortable.
"You ate a boar?"
"Да. Tastes like pig. Is pig. Boar is wild pig."
"Well, you got a point there."
"Да. I hunt since a long time. I know what is good."
They waited for over an hour. The sunset began. But they had luck. The boars were active. They saw one. Lori and Slobodan pointed their rifles at the Boar.
"Take aim." Lori said.
"Примљено к знању."
(Got it.)
Lori started counting.
"Три, два, један... пуцао."
(Three, two, one... shot.)
Lori and Slobodan shot at the same time at the boar. The Boar fell to its side, moved randomly, and then stopped.
"Да. Was good hunt." Slobodan said.
He looked at the fur of the boar.
"We can make an isolation for your baby with the boar."
"That is good. Maybe, we can make something really nice with the bunny furs we have. Something she can sleep in." Lori said.
They took the Boar and walked back to Soobodans hut. There, Slobodan put the Boar in a small barn behind his hut. He closed the barn.
"What do you gonna do with it?" Lori asked.
"Slaughter it, then I make it in the smoker I build."
They went in Slobodans hut, played some cards, and Lori went after an hour back to her hut, where she cooked some potatoes, wich she ate sitting in her chair. Lori looked at her belly while eating.
"Will you like this coat we make out of the boar?" Lori asked and took the next potato.
"The inside will be made of the Bunny fur. We shot around fifteen bunnies. You get a comfortable little coat."
One Month Later:
Lori looked at a small potato field that was next to her barn. Slobodan made it so they get potatoes again.
"That's great. Enough food for the winter. Well, only potatoes. But that's fine. Potatoes are good."
She heard steps behind her.
"Здраво Лори."
(Hello Lori.)
"Здраво Слободан."
(Hello Slobodan.)
"How are you doing?"
"Good. Thanks for making the field last week. I look forward to the harvesting."
"Да. The harvesting will be good."
"Come in. I found some plants we can use for making tea. Mostly wild mints."
"Sounds good. I started yesterday making Vodka from some potatoes." Slobodan said.
They entered the hut and went into the kitchen. Lori started to boil the water on the kitchen furnace.
"So, did your Vodka taste good?" Lori asked.
"Hmmm… somehow. Vodka is made to get drunk."
"I look forward to the end of my pregnancy. I wanna try vodka once."
Lori started feeling a pain in her womb and her private regions. Her pants started soaking.
Slobodan looked worried at Lori.
"What is happening?"
"The baby comes…" Lori said, and started breathing loud.
Slobodan took Lori under her shoulders.
"Bathroom." Slobodan said.
"I need a doctor." Lori said.
"No time. Baby comes. Bathroom."
Slobodan led her in the bathroom, and laid her in the bathtub. Lori got dizzy. So many things went through her head. She saw Slobodan, doing something. She noticed that he took off her shoes and pants. He looked at Loris genitals, and shook his head.
"Јеботе! Толико крви. Ово је горе од Сарајева."
(Goddamn shit! So much blood. This is worse than Sarajevo.)
Lori understood only a part of what Slobodan said.
"What is worse than Sarajevo?" She said.
"Ништа."
(Nothing.)
Lori started feeling something coming out of her. And then, everything went dark.
Lori opened her eyes. Something heavy was on her chest. Lori lifted her head, and saw a baby, wrapped in a Serbian flag. Her baby. Lori picked it up, and held it tightly in her arms.
"It's a girl." Slobodan said.
Lori looked to the door. Slobodan in the doorframe, looking at Lori and her daughter, holding a bottle oh his self made Vodka in his hands. He was obviously drunk.
"Slobodan? What happened?"
"You passed out. I had to help you. As she was out, she was crying. I placed her on you. I had to… Open your shirt. She was hungry."
Lori started feeling uncomfortable.
"You took my clothes off?"
"Was needed. Baby hungry. After that, I washed both of you, and put other clothes on you. I didn't find a blanket, so I got Srpska zastava. And Vodka. Then I laid you in the bed with your baby. That was three hours ago. It's the best for baby to be with mom."
"Yes. Lorraine wouldn't be happy if she weren't with me. And I wouldn't be happy without Lorraine?"
"Lorraine?" Slobodan asked.
"Yes. I don't know why this name came to my mind… But she is Lorraine."
"Lorraine. Hmmm… Лорраине. Cute name."
Lori Blushed. Slobodan stood up and sat next to Lori on her bed. Then he began to say a prayer.
"У Име Оца и Сина и Светог Духа. Амин.
Свемогући Господе, погледај милостиво на своју слугину Лорејн, која се Теби предаје с понизношћу и вером. Нека Твоје божанско светло сја на њој и води је стазама Твоје љубави. Дај јој снагу Твог Светог Духа, да ходи у Твојој истини и расте у Твојој милости. Благослови је Твојом љубављу и штити на свим путевима њеног живота. Кроз заступништво Пресвете Богородице, анђела и свих светих. Амин."
(In the Name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Amen.
Almighty Lord, look mercifully on your servant Lorraine, who surrenders to You with humility and faith. Let Your divine light shine on her and guide her along the paths of Your love. Give her the power of Your Holy Spirit, to walk in Your truth and grow in Your grace. Bless her with Your love and protect her in all the ways of her life. Through the intercession of the Most Holy Mother of God, the angels and all the saints. Amen.)
Slobodan poured a bit of his Vodka on his hand, and poured a few drops of it from his fingers on Lorraine's forehead. Lori wiped the Vodka drops away from Lorraine's forehead.
"Oh my god… You had to baptize her with vodka of course."
"She needs to be baptized. The lord wants it."
"But why with vodka?"
"That was the only thing I had here."
"And you already had enough of it. It's better you leave."
"Okay…"
Slobodan stood up and walked out of the room. Lori heard the door open and close. She was alone now with Lorraine. She looked at Lorraine and gave her a kiss on her forehead.
"I'm so happy you are healthy. I love you Lorraine."
Lorraine started moving, and it didn't took long until she started crying.
"Poor Lorraine. Are you hungry?"
Lori took her shirt off, and held Lorraine to her breasts. Lorraine immediately knew what she had to do, and started drinking. It was a strange feeling. And kinda pleasant. Like a tension that was dissolving in her breasts. Lorraine continued drinking. Looking at Lorraine made Lori feel happy the first time since almost a year.
End of chapter