As I reread my own words, set down on that paper, I tried to reflect on my reasons and desire for having turned Gonzalo into a vampire. I looked over and leafed through each page, as if trying to decipher the secret code that hid my attraction to him. The more I read, the more pain I felt, and I hated Od for having persuaded me to carry out the plan. I wanted to blame him, but I could hear, from the depths of the abyss of my soul, the whisper that accused my own soul of such a vile act.
I went up a hill, with my notebook and pencil. I saw a shooting star, and smiled. Amalia and Tomás were talking about an encounter Tomás had with a member of the Egyptian coven, wanting to explore a bit, and how the situation tensed when a human got in between.
Tomás had stood up to protect the person in question, while the other vampire, who also seemed to have been exploring, wanted to have a little snack before heading back. Amalia had warned Tomás not to venture too far, Africa was big, and our different kinds of prey should not bring competition. Tomás had unnecessarily ventured far from the area we had designated as acceptable. Amalia only hoped this small altercation would not bring conflict with the other coven. I checked my notebook again, which by now had become a kind of diary, and, inspired by the stars, I continued capturing my memories on paper.
Gonzalo, after having been turned, needed proof. He wanted to know who was responsible for the death of his family. Od brought Arthur's head and I tried to explain to him the shameful lie I had concocted in order to close the circle and be able to have Gonzalo with us, with me.
It was a partial truth. Arthur was going to kill Gonzalo after all, but he was far from the architect of the tragedy that had involved Gonzalo's wife and daughter. It was my fault and I had many opportunities to stop but I didn't. Having Gonzalo and the chance to savor his blood prevailed over reason.
Seeing Gonzalo as a vampire in all his splendor was like seeing a metamorphosis, like a butterfly emerging from the cocoon that hid its true self. Gonzalo had maintained his short stature, as I expected, and he didn't have the beauty standards that most vampires possessed, but he was definitely attractive by human standards.
His voice was definitely much more melodic, and the aroma emanating from his human past was still there, but better. I wanted to get closer to him, but his instability kept me, for now, at a distance. His charm was definitely concentrated in his voice and aroma, more potent than Arthur's or Darius'.
Gonzalo had always been a man of science, so trying to reveal our supernatural world to him shook him quite a bit. As he sank into his thoughts and looked at Arthur's head, I noticed he made a very peculiar expression. His pupils moved and his brow furrowed slightly, as if his mind was calculating something when he was human, now it freezes, as if stopped in time, with a penetrating gaze, focused on the task.
"He's processing information, his mind is working," I thought, watching him with fascination.
He started touching his own head and I used the opportunity to get closer to him.
"Are you okay? Does your head hurt? What do you feel? You can tell us," I asked him. Then I started caressing him lightly, in an attempt to decipher his thoughts.
"Stop! Leave that be," he begged me.
"Alright, I'm sorry, I just wanted to help," I replied, giving him a bit more space. Gonzalo started asking many questions about our species, the process, and very detailed things. He needed to rationalize our supernatural existence, for Gonzalo, everything was like a puzzle he was trying to reconstruct the world he already knew with this new revelation.
As he started making sense of everything and we kept discussing, we passed into the next day and Gonzalo was starting to feel the burning in his throat. My dear Gonzalo needed to feed, and I was already excited to show him the world through a vampire's eyes.
We insisted Gonzalo go out, but he was afraid to leave, thinking he would perish under the sunlight, until he stuck out a hand and after realizing he didn't burn he slowly started to come out.
"Oh, Gonzalo, you look absolutely radiant!" I exclaimed, it was wonderful and very funny to see his bewildered face under the sunlight. Then I added, "You see, my dear, vampires have a unique reaction to sunlight."
Upon noticing his skin sparkle under the sun, he started trying to wipe it off, as if it were dirt. Then he brought his eyes closer and analyzed every structure of his skin, as if it were a scientific experiment.
"A unique reaction? But I thought sunlight was supposed to burn us," he added, totally confused.
I laughed, and looking at him I answered.
"Ah, that's just a myth perpetuated by human legends, my dear. The truth is that the sun doesn't hurt us at all. Instead, it makes us...sparkle."
"So this is what it means to be a vampire in the sun? To dazzle like a disco ball?" he asked, trying to understand, as if it were a joke.
"Exactly! It's quite the spectacle, isn't it? But don't worry, Gonzalo, you'll get used to it. Soon you'll embrace your unique charm and learn to appreciate how you stand out in a crowd," I joked, looking him in the eyes.
We started walking, Od left me in charge of Gonzalo's first hunt and I decided to opt for an animal, and before leaving I signaled Od to get rid of Arthur's head. We'll spend a couple months on animals until Gonzalo is ready for a real prey, with the situation we were in, I thought it was more prudent to wait and see how things evolved.
His first hunt was precisely a wild boar, of great size. Gonzalo didn't seem comfortable drinking blood, a peculiar and unexpected behavior coming from a newborn vampire. I remember that even after having just fed, he let out a couple gags, while wiping his mouth. It was so funny that I couldn't help but cover my mouth and laugh a little, then I tried to console him knowing this new life and the traumas were a lot to process.
All of a sudden, Gonzalo stopped and looked up at the sky, he seemed to be alert to something, or having picked up on something, and then, abruptly acted as if nothing had happened. At that moment I was thinking about our possible future and all the possibilities, I had high hopes that Gonzalo had some kind of special ability, and it seemed that something was peeking through little by little.
We sat down near a waterfall afterwards, it was the perfect place to see if I could decipher something from his mind and test him.
"You know, Gonzalo, vampires are a diverse bunch. We all have unique abilities that set us apart from one another. It's like having a bag of tricks, each one different and intriguing," I said.
He nodded, and avoided looking at me, he seemed afraid of what would happen if our gazes met, then I continued.
"Tell me, Gonzalo, have you ever felt...different? Like there's something unique within you waiting to be unleashed?"
"Oh, what should I say? I mean..."
He didn't seem to understand what I was trying to say, I supposed gifts don't just come out so easily.
"Oh, Gonzalo, you underestimate yourself. I have the feeling there's more to you than meets the eye. But don't worry, your secrets are safe with me," I told him.
He took a pause, shrugged as if resigning himself and then said:
"Well, if I ever discover any hidden talents, you'll be the first to know, Anastasia. But until then, let's enjoy together the mysteries of the vampire world, okay?"
After a few weeks of wandering around and playing in the forest, I saw that Gonzalo was becoming more and more comfortable around me. He already accepted subtle things like friendly caresses and smiled at me a lot, although from time to time he seemed to stop abruptly and stare into nothingness, paralyzed, only to then resume and dismiss what had happened.
Od took us to the Alps, he wanted to give Gonzalo a surprise. I knew it was going to be the typical initiation ambush, in which he would brag about his martial arts and warrior spirit. We would climb to the top of a mountain, where there was a wide open space, we had been here previously with Arthur, so I said to myself:
"Okay, here we go again."
Before starting I told Gonzalo, "Oh, Gonzalo, don't let Od's words intimidate you. Climbing the Alps is like an exciting dance with nature, a chance to test our strength and agility. And don't worry, I'll be right by your side, guiding you every step of the way."
I wanted to test him, I needed to see his reaction. Od then started giving his boring speeches about what it means to be a vampire, abilities and all that. I limited myself to keep testing Gonzalo by telling him:
"And Gonzalo, I believe you possess your own gift, even if you're not yet aware of it. There is something about you, an appeal I've never found before. Maybe you have a unique ability waiting to be unlocked."
I brushed my fingers against his arm, to give him more confidence. "But don't let the weight of the world consume you, Gonzalo. Remember to find joy in the present moment, delight in the freedom and power our existence offers. Life as a vampire can be exciting if you allow yourself to embrace it."
While going up, Gonzalo kept being very pensive, I wanted to try one more time to see if he would open up a bit more and caressing his cheek I told him. "What are you thinking about, Gonzalo? Are you always lost in your thoughts?"
Od abruptly interrupted me, attacking Gonzalo and started testing him, he wanted to take advantage of the strength Gonzalo had as a newborn and train him for battle. I sat on a rock over there and started observing.
Od ripped off one of his ears and I helped Gonzalo put it back on, I took the chance to give him a kiss on his cheek and yelled "Go on, you can do it!"
While Od trained him, he explained to Gonzalo about newborn vampires like him and how to defend ourselves from other vampires. Then he dropped the bomb, he told him about human blood, up to that point Gonzalo had only consumed animal blood, I wished to buy some more time, I noticed Gonzalo felt very uncomfortable with the idea and I started worrying, we weren't supposed to talk about that for a couple more months.
We went down to a river during the night. Od explained to Gonzalo the difference between the behavior of animals and humans in front of a vampire, and about the importance of keeping our existence secret, the Volturi's rules and how strict they were. Gonzalo seemed attentive to all our explanations, even the most macabre ones, those that touched on topics like what should be done with our prey after feeding.
Unlike Gonzalo, Arthur had never paid attention to any of that and found it a drag. As a final punishment, I demanded Od leave Arthur in a deep hole under the cave, in Himmelsburg. I'll never forgive Arthur for what he almost managed to do to me, my coven and above all, Gonzalo. Arthur would live in limbo, unable to die or move, in total darkness. Immortality under certain circumstances could be hell itself.