I lay awake in the bed William and I had shared, hardly being able to sleep. I stared at the door. I longed for the door to open and WIlliam to step inside returning from one of his missions. I knew that would not happen no matter how much I wished for it. It was impossible and he was gone. In the next few hours I would be sitting in front of the few who truly knew where I came from and had to give them a decision. Yet I still did not know what that decision was. There was a part of me that was afraid. What if I didn't end up where I wanted? What if William was in a different time? What if he still ended up dead due to his injuries?
If I stayed, what kind of life would I have here? WIlkins had assured me that I would be taken care of along with the children whether i remarried or not. O'hara's proposal was unexpected but he did have standing in the aristocracy. Even for a Baron's Illegitimate heir. The Children would have many opportunities. I rolled over facing away from the door. I had noticed more than once that O'hara had been looking me over and at more than one dinner he had made me very uncomfortable. It would be a better life than a single mother in the 16th century. At that thought I burst out laughing. I really just considered marrying O'Hara. The man William hated above anyone else second to the ghost. I had no clue what O'hara would even want with me, Tavington's widow, besides my knowledge and I didn't really know much about him. He could end up being like Brandon. I sighed aggravatedly and punched the pillow. Just then the door opened. I Sat up and spun in one quick movement. "William!"
"Mama?" It was Susan. That was the first time she called me Mama. She came over to the edge of the bed. "I had a bad dream. Can I sleep with you?" I scooted over on the bed and pulled back the blankets so she could climb in.
"Of course sweetie. What's the matter?" I pulled the blankets back over the both of us. She snuggled into me.
"I had a bad dream. Bad men were coming after us because they hate daddy. If he were here he would keep us safe." She began to cry. "I miss him already. When he came back late he would alway check to make sure I was safe in bed. If I was awake he would read me another story." She was silent after that and cried. " I held her as I sang to her until she fell asleep. I lay there for a moment longer and my mind finally made up. I was a mother now and my children whether blood or not needed to be put first. I had to find William even if the chance of his survival from his wounds was minimal. . My children needed their father and in some time there was a chance he was alive. I had a glimmer of hope that he was. I just hoped he was in my time or whatever power that has brought us together will do so again. He would have the best chance of survival medically there. Soon I fell asleep and what felt like moments later I was woken by Margeret.
"Lady Tavington. Tis time you'd be risin and best be preparin for your meeting with the Lord General." She smiled at me as she pulled out my dress for the day. Susan began to stir. "Don't fret my dear You'll be seeing your Colonel again," She sat up and looked
over at Margaret with wide bleary eyes.
"How can I see him again?" came susans small sleepy voice as she climbed out of bed and ran over to Margeret.
"Susan, Come her princess." She came back over to the bed and I pulled her up onto my lap.
"There are some things that I need to tell you about where I came from, Daddy might be there. But first I must speak with Lord Cornwallis first." She nodded with a confused look on her face and slid off my lap so I could dress. Margaret picked up the black dress that I was to wear as appropriate for a lady in mourning and slipped it over my head.
Finally dressed I made my way down stairs and down the hall to Cornwalis's Office just as the table was being set for breakfast. I walked over to the window and looked out over the land reflecting over the time I've spent here and the people I have made friends with. I would miss them as I'm sure that they would miss me. Especially Mary. Soon I would have to tell her the truth. I know I withheld it from her. She believed like most the story I had told was the truth. This would hurt her. I looked up as I heard footsteps enter the room. O'hara had been the first to arrive.
"Have you thought about my proposal?" He asked as he approached me and came to stand next to me looking out the window. "Should I expect the sound of wedding bells in the near future?" At that moment Mary walked in.
"General! Our dear friend is grieving. That is hardly appropriate so soon after the Colonel's passing." She came over to me as O'hara took a step back so Mary could greet me with a hug.
"It is quite alright Mary. No harm done." I gave her a small smile as we broke apart. "Do you mind giving us a moment alone, Mary." She nodded and went back into the hallway for a moment. "General, your offer is as unexpected as it was kind… Unless you have some ulterior motive behind your proposal." He looked away out over the lawn.
"You may be from another time and no doubt have useful information for years to come. However, my offer to you was not anything other than honest and based on the feelings I have for you." He turned to me and took a step closer. " I have had my eye on you long before Tavington convinced The Lord General to give you to him." Emotion had filled his eyes. " I have loved you from the first time that I laid my eyes upon you Anastasia." He reached out and picked up my hand. "Please do me the honor of marrying. After the proper time of grievance, Of course." I looked into his eyes for a moment before pulling my hand and my gaze away directing it toward the floor.
"Charles," I looked back up at him. "My answer is no." His gaze turned hard and his hand came flying through the air, landing across my face.
"You Bitch. I was willing to save you and your bastard children from a life of begging on the streets. You could have had a life of grandeur. Far more superior than a life on the streets. Still that would seem to be a preferable choice to finding dear William."
"GENERAL O'HARA!" Came Cornwallis's booming voice. " THAT IS NOT BEHAVIOR BEFITTING OF AN OFFICER OF THE KING'S ARMY. GET OUT OF MY SIGHT BEFORE I COURT MARSHALL YOU." O'hara quickly left. "Are you alright my dear?" He walked over to me and then led me to the table.
"Yes, I'm quite fine my lord. O'hara hits like a sissy." We sat as Mary reentered with Wilkins and they joined us at the table. The doors closed shortly after coffee and tea was brought along with Bacon egg and cheese sandwiches which I had given the instructions on how to make to Margaret a few days prior when I was preparing for the inevitable. I began to make my coffee. "So you know why we are here." I looked between Cornwallis and Wilkins. "You both know I've had several decisions that were difficult. One was not but that doesn't matter." I turned to Mary and placed my hand on hers. "You have been such a good and loyal friend to me. You have become like a sister to me but I have kept a secret from you. I hope that you can forgive me and understand that we had to hold this from you. We did it to keep you safe as well as others. I'm from the future. 250 years to be exact." She jerked her hand away and anger consumed her features. She stood up, knocking her chair over.
"I would have never told Stasi… No matter how ridiculous it sounds. And what do you mean We?" Cornwallis stood up and went over to his desk and unlocked the bottom draw with a key from his pocket. He pulled out my book and returned to the table, placing it inform of Mary. She looked at her father. 'You both knew! Who else? Was I the only one left in the dark?" Tears were streaming down her face. There was no doubt in my mind that she felt betrayed.
"William knew as well as Bordon and O'hara." Her eyes snapped over to me "You could have trusted me with this. I would have never put you in harm's way, Stasi." She grabbed her sandwich and left the office slamming the door behind her angrily. I looked down into my coffee, saddened that I had hurt my closest friend by not including her in the secret. There was a moment of silence
"She will come around Lady Tavington. Just give her some time and she will understand why we did not tell her." Cornwallis said as I looked back up. "She will forgive you Anastasia. You have become like a sister to her and a daughter to me as well." I had no idea that he thought of me that way after things had sorted themselves out.
"So what have you decided then my lady?" Wilkins asked after swallowing.
"I've decided that I am going to go find William. I am going home back to my time. I need to do this. Wherever he is he will have no one And trust me, being thrown into a completely different time is completely overwhelming to say in the least Gentleman."
"You will greatly missed Lady Tavington." Wilkins had and Cornwallis nodded in agreement.
"When do you plan on this trip?" Cornwallis took a sip of his tea. I tucked a piece of hair behind my ear.
"Within the week. There are some things I must do first." I took a bite of my sandwich and chewed slowly and swallowed. "And what are we to tell people of what happened to me?" Cornwallis cleared his throat.
"Simply that you could not stand being here. Your grief was too much to bear while you had memories of the Colonel at every turn so you went North to Canada. To start over in a new colony of His Majesty. Remaining a British subject if we were to lose this war." I nodded and smiled. That would do. It was convincing and simple. And to make people believe that I was loyal to the crown so as to not disgrace Tavington. "And the girl? Do you think it wise to bring her to a time she knows nothing of? You should return her to whence she came."
"I suppose that I should try to bring her back, but who knows where they are? Nevertheless I will delay my departure for a few days." I pushed my coffee away from the edge of the table, hesitating a moment. "Are you aware of Lord Cornwallis that she was found alone In the aunt plantation?" He nodded.
"That does not necessarily mean that they weren't there somewhere. Just imagen Lady Tavington if someone took your child from you. You may have taken care of her and see her like a daughter and you a mother to her but she is not yours and she has a family." He stared at me for a moment. "Return her to her family. Lady Tavington, That's in order. And I will not release you from duty until you do so. Do I make myself clear?" His tone was the same as the one he frequently used with Tavington. I narrowed my eyes on him.
"I fail to see how that is a military concern General, however I will try to return her to Mr. Martin."
"See that you do." He stood up and left for his morning walk around the gardens. Leaving Wilkins and I there. Wilkins cleared his throat and I looked at him as he stood.
"I shall escort you Anastasia." Wilikins said as he finished up his meal. "I have a home in the city that you can make use of until you depart."
"That is very kind of you, Wilinks. I shall go get Susan ready." I took the last sip of my coffee and headed for the door. Making my way up the stairs to Susan's room I stopped when I heard footsteps behind me. I turned to see it was Wilkins.
"I shall have the carriage ready in two hours. To give you some time to explain to the girl the situation." He passed me and made his way to his room.
"Wilkins…" He froze with his hand on the door knob. "You have to help me keep susan. She doesn't belong with Benjamin." He sighed and made his way over to me.
"Does she belong with you? Anastasia, think about how you would feel if someone took your child from you and you had no idea where they were or if they even lived." I looked away from him. " I know you love her as a daughter and she as a mother. What is morally right?"
"I suppose you're right, but it doesn't make it any easier. She doesn't have a mother with Martin. But you could help me keep her." I looked at him hopefully.
"I would be court marshaled for directly disobeying orders and possibly charged with kidnapping."
"You could come with us. To my time."
"I'll consider it." He left and went to his room and I entered Susan's room.
Margaret was teaching her letters as she ate. "Please leave Margaret. I need to speak to Susan alone." Placing the cards on the bed she stood and left. I closed the door behind her. "Susan…" I grabbed the chair from the desk that so many mornings I had woken to see William standing there waiting for me to say something in my sleep. I shook my head to clear it from the memory. "Mama isn't from here Princess. And since Daddy is gone it's time for me to go home… For both of us to go home." A tear rolled down my cheek. She came closer to me and I scooted off the chair to sit on the bed and she crawled into my lap.
"That's why you are different and sometimes sound funny when you say things, but not like daddy." She shifted and I tucked a strand of hair behind her ear interested in what she would say next. I gave her a sad smile. "The Princess from the future….That's you!" She looked away from me and slid her hand under the covers. When she brought it back out she was holding my ipod. "Daddy told me about the princess from the future that found herself through back in time. To a bad time. But she was brave and didn't need a prince to save her from the dragon."
"Daddy Told you that." She nodded her blonde curls bouncing. There was a knock at the door.
"It's me." Wilkins' voice came through the door, I got up to open it. "The Carriage is ready." Susan stared at him.
"Thank you Wilkins." I looked back at susan. "Gather your things sweetheart, while I speak with the Captain. We will be leaving soon." I left the room and entered my own, Wilkins following. I quickly began packing. "You still have your home in Charles town?" He nodded. "Good, You have to help me hide Susan. She's coming with me."
"But Lord Cornwallis said…" I spun around so fast I knocked over my perfume.
"Does it look like i give a fuck what he said Captin. She is my daughter. More than she was ever his. There are no consequences for me taking her with me." I stared at him angrily before turning away from him and grabbing some of William's things.
"And what of the consequences I face if I help you? He will know it is me who has done so." I froze then. Of course he would face consequences. He would be court martialed or hanged for kidnapping. I turned toward him
"I'm sorry, that would be selfish. I will try to return her to Martin." I finished gathering my things. "You could always come with us. You know have become like a brother to me. I already lost one, don't make me lose another." I grabbed my bags and Wilkins picked up one I could not carry.
"Think how much you would gain by losing me and finding the Colonel. But I shall think about accompanying you." We left the room that I had shared with William and gathered Susan and her things and headed outside.
I helped Susan climb into the carriage and climbed in after her. Wilkins closed the door to the carriage and climbed up in front and grabbed the reins. The ride into Charles town was bumpy. Susan fell asleep resting her head on my lap. How was I supposed to tell her that I had to bring her back to her true family? I didn't want to give her up and I know she most likely will not want to go back. But I had to try. It was the right thing to do.
Eventually we made it into town and pulled up to a White House. My eyes widened as I began to recognize Wilkis's house. It was sizable and in my time had been a bed and breakfast. A famous one at that. "Susan, wake up. We are here." She slowly opened her eyes and sat up just as Wilkins opened the door. I climbed out first then turned around to grab Susan and headed up to the path.
"Susan?" A shocked voice came from behind me. I froze on the path. That voice I had heard only twice but it was recognizable. Slowly turning I came to face Benjamin Martin. He stepped forward and reached for her but she pulled away. A pained expression came over his face. "It's me Susan. It's papa." His eyes landed on me when he received no response from his child.
"I'm so sorry . I could not imagen how it must have felt to not know of Susan's whereabouts." I put Susan down. "This is not how I intended for this to happen. I was going to contact you to meet with me after we had settled."
"You had her all this time and you never thought to reach out." He crossed his arms angrily. "She's my child!" He yelled. I looked around uncomfortably.
"Perhaps we can speak inside." He nodded and followed me in. Upon entering I noticed a sitting room to the left of the foyer. It was decorated in creams and light blue. We both sat Susan on the floor next to me with her doll. "Susan, please go into the other room. I need to talk with your father." She looked up at me angrily. But then got up and stomped out of the room. "I have taken good care of her. I just want to assure you that. She has become like a daughter to me and William." He glared.
"But she is not your daughter... She is mine and her place is with me and her siblings. Besides, how is the butcher's widow going to raise a child? You are not fit to be a mother." He hissed. "You should have returned her the moment Tavington arrived with her."
"You do not get to decide whether I will be a good mother or not. But it seems that she was found alone but William in your sister in law's plantation. We cared for her and loved her like she was our own."he inhaled sharply.
"That beast you call a husband had no right to attempt to be her father. He has no right to be a father at all."
"I'll ignore that comment Benjamin. I'm here because I am going away and thought it best that I should attempt returning her to you." There was a thud in the hallway and we both turned to look to see Susan standing at the door. Her doll on the floor.
"Mama! I don't want to go with papa! I want you!" I stood up and approached 's face was shocked.
"She's talking? He got up and came over to us and reached out for her but she took a step back.
"I know you do princess. But don't you want to see your siblings?"
"This is ridiculous, she's a child. Mine and she's coming with me." He reached out and grabbed Susan. She began to fight and to cry.
"NO, I don't want to go with you." She scratched him across the face. YOU KILLED DADDY! I hate you papa and I never want to see you again!" Martin released his grim on her. She ran out of the room. I turned to Martin who looked like his heart just broke.
"What else will this war take from me?" He said brokenly as clasped onto the floor. I knelt down next to the man who had killed my husband and placed my hand. On his shoulder.
"War takes from all of us. Mr. Martin. I'm truly sorry that this ended like this." He looked up at me. There was a long pause before he started to stand up.
"Maybe it's better this way. She has been in need of a mother in her life. She does look well taken care of. If not a little spoiled." I laughed.
"I blame William for that." I smiled at a few memories of William and Susan together. "Always telling her extra bedtime stories and bringing her back toys and such." His eyes narrowed.
"Things he most likely stole on his excursions no doubt." His eyes filled with hatred.
"Why must you make him a monster when he is just a man." I turned and looked into the flames in the fireplace. "Wasn't it you who slaughtered a bunch of men at the beginning of the war?" I looked up to him once more dead in the eye. "Wasn't it you during the french and indian war that scalped men women and children and sent them down to the Cherroke in Ashland? If we are going off of how you see people then you are a monster as well, are you not?" He looked away as if ashamed. "Don't assume that you know anything about my husband." I almost yelled. "How can you stand there after the things you have done and view another as irredeemable and a monster?" I was crying now. Captain Wilkins walked in.
"Is everything alright, Lady Tavington?" Martin looked at him then turned to grab his hat and jacket. He turned to me as he was leaving.
"I meant no offense. Lady Mckenzie."
"It's Lady Tavington and I believe you meant every offense . As it was you who killed him. You only sought one thing and that was his death to avenge Thomas's death. I watched as you killed him." He stares at me in shock. Obviously he hadn't known that I saw or knew about thomas. My legs began to shake. "GET OUT!" I shouted and he left the room and the house. I fell to the floor and Wilkins rushed over to me. "We're going to the market tomorrow." He nodded and helped me onto the couch.
"Yes but rest now and I will go get something for the three of us to eat." He rose and left.