A/N: So you guys want to see more Harry Potter ideas? Then how about I dump every single fanfic idea I've ever had into a single collection, a drabble set, so to speak. It has crossovers, Dumbledore bashing parodies...and all of the above. I make fun of just about every single thing you could imagine, use crossovers, and shit. It won't be a very long series of drabbles since I have less of these in me than I do for TWD or TVD or Re zero...but expect me to take some stuff from my discord and incorporate it here. Nothing will make sense, it will be very OOC at some points, and weird at others.

This will be the chiefly HP only idea area, so mostly parody and critique shit here. Expect random ass parodies, blatant calling out of bs in fanon, and sometimes even looking at canon to go wtf is that shit, chief, and why is it in the series?

Drabble 1: The Headmaster's Boggart (aka Harry!My Boi Dumbles)

Dumbledore stood before the shaking cabinet. He could do this. He was over one hundred years old. He had beaten Voldemort and Grindelwald, and even in a way subjugated the Greater Good by utilizing it to be the worst (best) teacher in school ever.

But this...he couldn't do this.

The boggart inside was surely analyzing every area, every inch of its surroundings, and learning what he looked like, and his worst nightmare.

The cupboard door swung open, and a mirror version of Albus Dumbledore jumped out, only this one looked utterly bizarre. For one, he was twirling his mustache, for another he was muttering to himself, and he had a puppet version of Harry he was obsessed with. The only words he could understand from the gibberish were "prophecy", and "Chosen One."

"Harry, m'boy." The boggart!Dumbledore began, looking at his good counterpart, who looked equally confused, "Excellent, you have summoned me to this dimension. Now I can begin my scheming."

"I never call Harry that and never would dream of doing so. Also, how are you back again? I do believe this is the 50th time this year I've sent you back into closets." Dumbledore sighed.

"You can never escape me. The boy will be used by us and the boy will die. I must prevent him having snakes and being a Slytherin."

"I find your ideas childishly puerile and outright laughable. I turned you into a Boggart specifically because you were better off as a nuisance everyone could laugh at rather than listen to."

"What about the prophecy? The part where you use Harry and steal his bank money?"

"Whatever would I have an interest in his money for? It is Harry's and Harry's alone. Are you forgetting I let Hagrid show Harry his vault, or...is that too convenient to wipe away?"

The boggart froze, seemingly at a loss for words. "I have other companions! They'll take all of your places! You watch! The Dumb Old Door will die!" Its cackling sounded like a chipmunk and Albus suspected he was going to need a stronger dose of butterbeer to fend off this headache he had incoming.

"Riddikulus."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

The boggart Dumbledore disappeared in a shriek as it was banished back to the inbetween-another closet, this time set up in the middle of Australia.

"DAMN YOU!"

He couldn't carry out his plan of "kill and replace" Dumbledore for some reason, but why? His other self was supposed to be senile...why?

Dumbledore proceeded to set up countermeasures for that plan, too.

This alternate version of him had been transformed into a boggart by a misfired spell that hit him and promptly turned him into a powerless little cretin that had no power except to curse at his enemies and make up harebrained schemes.

"Did it appear again, Professor Dumbledore?" McGonagall said, unsurprised at the bizarre shit that followed her Headmaster.

"Yes, it did. This time, I sent it after Voldemort. I suspect he will put it to good use as a punching bag."

"Are you sure that is a good idea?" She asked.

"Trust me. He won't fall for it. As long as people can laugh at it, he has no real power." Dumbledore shrugged his shoulders, recalling the one time he'd encountered the thing on the toilet and had promptly sent it to the Forbidden Forest, then to Sybil Trelawney's class for an extended period of time, (after which it had given up out of fear of how bad of a teacher she was).

It would reappear again, and the next time, he would be ready. All he had to do was teach Harry the Riddikulus spell.

Now to contact Professor Lupin.