Wow, updating two stories within a week. Go me! (Kidding. But it's nice after my recent track record.) Angela and Topanga will be talking in the next chapter. And again, I ask that you trust me when I say I have a plan with Cory and Shawn, because they're not going to be coming off too well right now. But please, just trust me. Oh, and I will still have some silly, goofy Eric, but there wasn't a lot of opportunity in this chapter.
Thanks for all of your feedback. I appreciate it. Happy reading! :-)
"What do you mean she wasn't in the room this morning?"
Topanga sighed and lie back on her fiancé's bed. "Angela was gone when I woke up. I can't get any clearer than that."
"Where did she go?"
"I don't know. She didn't leave a note this time."
"We have to track her down so we can get to the bottom of what's going on."
"Cory, I don't think bombarding her is going to help right now."
"But don't you remember what I told you she said? How else would she know Eric talks in his sleep unless she was in a position to hear him?"
"She guessed? A lot of people talk in their sleep."
"She was smirking when she said it- a naughty, 'I'm up to no good' smirk. Angela's not supposed to hear Eric talk in his sleep. It's supposed to be Shawn."
"And we are now entering territory that is very much not our business. Don't you think you're reading too much into it?"
"Since when do I read too much into things?"
It was all Topanga could do to not laugh in his face. "How about every day of your life," she suggested as she sat up. "I have to go to the store and buy some index cards, high lighters, and a few other supplies. Come with me?"
"If I do, can we find Angela and talk to her?"
"If we happen to stumble upon Angela- fine, but we're not sniffing her out like those drug sniffing police dogs."
/
/
"Wow," Jack exclaimed as Eric stumbled down the stairs and into the living room of their apartment, "I was starting to think I'd have to go in there with an air horn to get you up. You had to be asleep for at least fourteen hours." He and Rachel got back to the apartment right after Eric last night and planned to quiz him then, but he was already passed out.
"It was a long trip. Haven't you ever heard of jet lag?"
"You drove."
"Fine, then car lag! What do you want?"
He slid a cup of coffee across the island. "Lighten up. Why the hell are you so cranky?"
"I'm allowed to be cranky first thing in the morning."
"Eric, it's one in the afternoon."
"I'm allowed to be cranky first thing in the afternoon."
"Seriously, what's going on?"
"Nothing, sorry I'm a grouch. For the past two weeks I've either slept on Sgt. Moore's couch or took naps in the car. My muscles haven't forgiven me yet. I though sleeping in my bed again would cure it, but it didn't."
"You stayed with Angela and her dad the whole time?"
"That wasn't my plan. I was going to drop Angela off and keep going, visit some places I've never been. But the weather was ugly and her dad said it would be stupid for me to try to find a hotel. By the time conditions cleared up and the risks for mudslides were over it would have been dumb to leave since by the time I got there I'd have to turn back, pick up Angela, and come home."
He nodded. "So, what's the deal with you and Angela?"
"We're…friends, friendly…friendish?"
"That last one's not a word. Are you guys-is something going on?"
Eric sat down on the stool and leaned his elbow against the island top, resting his face in his hand. "I don't know."
"How the hell do you not know? Either you're together or you're friends."
"There's room in between together and friends- a lot of room."
"What does that mean? Did something happen?"
"It's all right. You can stop pretending to be interested."
"What?"
"You don't want to listen to this."
"Where are you getting that?"
"Shawn's your brother and Angela used to date him."
"Yeah, and?"
"Why would you want to hear about me and Angela when he's still in love with her?"
"Because you're my best friend and Shawn…well, he's my brother, but he also screwed up. I'm neutral. Consider me Switzerland."
"We failed our project on Switzerland months ago, Jackie. I don't see how watches, chocolate, and cheese would help anyway."
He gaped at his friend. "Are you kidding me right now? Just tell me what's going on!"
Eric took an Oreo from the pack on the counter and twisted it around until the cream was exposed. "We kissed."
"Oh."
"And maybe some more stuff."
"You slept together?"
"No, but things were happening fast and I don't know if we would've have stopped if her dad didn't interrupt."
"He caught you," Jack asked, wincing in sympathy. "That happened to me once sophomore year in high school, only it was both parents. What was her name? Oh! Brenda! That's it: Brenda. Man, I thought her dad was gonna murder me."
He shook his head. "He called Angela to say his meeting finished early and he'd be home to take us out to dinner. Trust me, if he had caught the live show I'd be breathing out of a straw right now. He's a giant with awards for shooting guns."
"Huh?"
"He's in the army."
"Right. So her dad calls, she stops you, and-"
"I stopped things."
"Really?"
"She didn't hear the phone. I had to stop it."
"Wow." Jack watched as he continued to remove Oreos from the pack one by one and twist them open. "Could you knock it off? You're wasting the cookies."
He looked at the counter. "Oh, sorry."
"Have you and Angela talked about what happened?"
"We had a thirteen hour car ride home to kill."
"Is that a yes or a no?"
"We talked. We talked a lot."
"And?"
"And nothing. We're seeing how things go. It's complicated."
"But you want to date her?"
"Oh, yeah."
"And she wants to date you?" Eric nodded. "Then why aren't you- it's Shawn, isn't it?"
"It's everybody. Shawn and Cory already give her enough crap trying to fix her up with Shawn again. Could you imagine what she'd have to deal with if we were together? I can't put Angela through that."
"Don't you think you should let her decide if she can handle it?"
"Can we talk about something else? I need to try and not think about this for a while."
"That bad, huh?"
"Is that changing the subject?"
"Sorry."
"How are you and Rachel?"
That certainly wasn't the new topic Jack had in mind. "We're good. You know, I've wanted to talk to you about us, but you've hardly been around the apartment lately- before you went out of town even."
"I know. I've been keeping busy."
"Look, man, nothing has to change just because me and Rachel are together. We're still roommates and if you're upset-"
"Jack, no, I was never upset about Rachel."
He frowned. "You weren't?"
"I thought I was, but I was talking to Angela and she helped me see that I was never in love with Rachel. It wasn't "losing" her that got to me. It was losing period."
"I don't get it."
"I lost the bet to you. Let's face it, we got pretty competitive. But I spent more time trying to make you look bad instead of getting Rachel to like me. I hate losing in general and didn't want to lose to you. But you won."
Jack smiled into his coffee. "Yeah, I did win, didn't I?"
"What bet?"
Jack and Eric turned around and saw Rachel standing by the front door. They didn't hear her come in. "Oh, hey, Rach."
"Hi."
"How much of the conversation did you hear?"
"Enough to know I might not like the answer to my question, but I'll ask again anyway. What bet did you make?"
"Well, you see, we…"
"When you first moved in we made a bet to see who could get you to fall for them," Jack answered. Lying would get him nowhere at this point.
"You what?"
"It was right after you moved in. We didn't know you that well," Eric explained, trying to smooth things over.
She dropped her shopping bags onto the couch and walked further into the apartment. "That makes it all right? You made a bet, plotted behind my back, and acted like I was some trophy to be won."
"Sorry," the guys replied in unison.
"That's all you have to say?"
"Rach, look, were we jerks? Yeah, but that's old news. The better man won." Eric winced at his choice of words. "I mean you picked the guy who is a better match for you. It turns out I was more into the competition."
"Is that supposed to make me feel better? You never cared about me, even as a friend?"
"Of course I care about you. What I mean is I was focused on some superficial image. Jack got to know the real you."
"It's still a relationship started on a lie."
"Rachel-"
She stared at her boyfriend. "I need to think for a while."
"Can't we just-"
"Alone," she said, pointing at him. "You guys can put the groceries away. I bought stuff to make Eric's favorite foods as a sort of welcome home dinner, but I've lost my appetite." She ran up the stairs and to her room.
Jack punched Eric's arm. "Thanks a lot, man."
"Ow! What did I do?"
"You're the one who was talking about the bet!"
"I didn't know she was standing there. Besides, I thought you told her about it by now."
"Why the hell would I tell her something that would hurt her feelings?"
"You're right, Jack, it's much better that she overheard us talking about it instead."
"Shut up." He ran his hands through his hair. "I have to figure out of to fix this."
"You want help?"
"You've helped enough."
/
/
Angela shut her text book and closed her eyes, trying to digest all of the information she had just read. She had forgotten a book while packing and hurried to get the assigned reading done in between her errands. With her errands and reading now finished, what she really wanted was a nap. But a nap would mean chancing run-ins with people who wanted explanations and she still wasn't feeling up to talking just yet.
She woke up early, long before Topanga typically gets up, so she could slip away in peace and not have to play twenty questions. That she's managed to avoid Topanga, as well as Cory and Shawn the entire day was nothing short of a miracle. She knew it was inevitable, however, especially sitting here in the Student Union. Eric had mentioned yesterday that he was working a shift behind the coffee counter, but she couldn't remember what time he would be around. Angela was hoping to see him today. After spending the past couple weeks in such close quarters it was strange trying to go about her day without him right there. She even missed his breakfast routine, which included voicing the characters on the cereal boxes.
"Hi, Angela."
She turned around and wasn't entirely surprised to see Shawn standing there. There was a brown notebook clutched in his hands. "Hi."
"Can I-is it all right if I sit?"
"Sure, I guess so." She moved her books over to her side of the table. "What's up?"
"I was hoping to see you. There's a lot we have to talk about."
"You're right. There is."
"But first, there's something I want you to read."
"Really, what?"
"It's a poem…a poem I wrote for you." He shifted around nervously and held the book out to her.
"Oh, Shawn, I don't think-"
"Just read it. Please? Read it first before you say anything."
She sighed and reluctantly accepted the notebook.
/
"Ow, Cory, what are you-" They had been going to get some coffee when he stopped suddenly, causing her to crash into his back.
"Shh," he hissed in a loud whisper. "Topanga, look!" He stood in one of the entrances for the union, practically jumping up and down with glee. "Shawn and Angela! Shawn and Angela!" He wrapped his arm around his fiancée's shoulders. "We'll have to mark this date in the calendar: the day our best friends get back together. Can you feel it, Topanga? We're witnessing history."
Topanga tended to agree with him, though judging by the look on Angela's face, Cory's use of the word history had a totally different meaning than what was about to go down.
/
"Well," Shawn began nervously, "what do you think?"
"It's a lovely poem."
"And?"
"And I can tell you spent a lot of time on it."
He frowned. This was not the reaction he had been hoping for. "Do you understand what I'm trying to say?"
"Yeah, it's pretty impossible to miss." She sighed and placed the notebook back in front of him. "Look, Shawn-"
"No, me first. I know I made a lot of mistakes and I screwed everything up, but give me a chance. I want to make things right between us, to get back what we had. I still love you. Please, please give me the opportunity to prove it to you." He reached for her hand, but she leaned back. He frowned. "Angela, you believe me when I say that I love you...right?"
"I believe that you mean it today. Right now, yes, I have no doubts that you think you love me and want to be with me. But tell me, Shawn, how are you going to feel next week?"
"I don't under-"
"Or next month? Hell, tomorrow even? Will you still love me then?"
"What are you talking about? Of course I'm going to love you then. I'm going to love you forever...for the rest of my life." Shawn studied her face, looking for any indication that her walls were coming down. Her expression was unreadable. He'd get down on his hands and knees and beg if that's what it took to convince her. "Come on, you can't tell me you don't feel the same way."
"A part of me is always going to love you. I think that comes with the territory for a first love, but-"
"Angela, please, no buts."
"I'm not saying I'm perfect and that I've handled everything in our relationship the right way, because I know that's not true. But you have to learn from your mistakes and that's what I'm doing."
"I was a mistake? We were a mistake?"
"My mistake was letting you play my heart like a yo-yo for months in the name of figuring out who you are. That's not love- it's manipulation, even if you don't realize you're doing it."
"I was mixed up and confused. I thought I was missing out on something, that I needed to explore my options, but I was wrong. That time apart made me realize how much you meant to me."
"Funny, I never had to explore my options to realize your worth in my life."
"I'm sorry."
"You dragged me through hell. You can't tell someone you love them, kiss them, write poetry about them, but then back out at the last minute and say you're not ready."
"I'm sorry." He was getting the sinking feeling that no matter how many times he apologized it would never be enough. "I'm so sorry."
"I'm tired of hearing I'm sorry!" Angela shoved her books into her bag and moved to leave, but he blocked her way. "I took the chance and opened my heart to you on more than one occasion. You knew how difficult that was for me and yet you threw it back in my face every time like it meant nothing. It made me feel like I meant nothing."
"I-"
"And then...oh, here's the funniest part of this whole thing- all of a sudden you and Cory flip the script and start treating me like the bad guy, as if I was the one who ended things out of the blue and broke your heart. Talk about using creative license to totally rewrite history."
"I thought the break up was mutual."
"What was I supposed to do? Get down on my hands and knees and beg you to stay with me? Yeah," she scoffed, "that's a dream. I have more self-respect than that. If you didn't want to be with me, fine. I've had enough people walk out in my life to know eventually that I would find a way to move on and deal."
"Y-you-you're over me?"
This time she took a few steps closer and took his hands. "I'm not trying to hurt you. I don't want to hurt you. But I'm done letting you hurt me. I'm done wondering which Shawn is going to show up today- the one who loves me or the one who needs space. I'm done being your emotional punching bag. I'm just...I'm done." She released his hands and tried to walk away.
"Angela-"
She shook her head. "It's over."
The finality in her tone and the look in her eyes scared the hell out of him. She sounded like she really meant it this time. Still, he had to try. He reached for her arm. "But-"
"Please. Stop. You wanted to explore your options and find out who you are? Great. Have fun. You are free to do so. Believe it or not I do hope you find whatever it is that you're looking for. I want you to be happy. But I'm not going to be in the wings waiting for you to get your shit together. I deserve better than that. I deserve someone who will treat me like their priority, not their back up plan."
"So because you and Eric decide to-"
"Eric has nothing to do with this. Leave him out of it. This is about you and me."
"You're not even going to give me a second chance?"
"Christmas was your second chance. You stood right here in this room and listened to me tell you how much I still loved you and wanted to be with you." She hated the tears that stung her eyes, but it was still a painful, embarrassing moment in her life. She had been so ready to believe him and didn't hesitate in opening her heart...only to be rejected yet again. "You kissed me and said you loved me, too. I thought we were getting back together. But then-"
"I was an idiot."
"Yeah, you were."
"But I-"
She shook her head and backed away from him. "I'll see you around."
"Angela, hang on just a second."
"Of course," she muttered, "this wouldn't be complete without getting Cory's opinion on our lives." She turned around and found Cory behind her. Topanga was there as well, though staying off to the side. "What is it? I'm assuming you heard everything." He said nothing, which irritated her more. "Come on, let me have it."
"I know Shawn hasn't always done the best job loving you, but don't you think you're being a little rash? I mean, give the guy a break. His dad just died and his mom left him. I think Shawn deserves a little grace period to get himself together."
"My mom walked out on me, too. Does that entitle me to special treatment in your eyes or is that a Shawn exclusive?" She hadn't been planning on dropping this bombshell, but if nothing else, maybe they would get off her case and shut up for a little bit.
That wasn't the response Cory had been expecting. "Excuse me?"
"I was nine. She dropped me off at school and I haven't seen her since. Her last words to me were, 'Bye, June bug, I love you. Have a good day.'"
"June bug?"
"Your mom left," Topanga asked, shocked she'd never said anything before. "Why didn't you ever say anything?"
She looked at the trio of faces before her. "Because I didn't want people to look at me the way you guys are right now. I don't need the poor Angela stares and comments. No pity needed here."
"But what about a little support?"
"It took a long time to come to terms with it, but I did. I'm not my mother and I refuse to let her actions dictate my life."
Shawn took a few steps forward, feeling braver with Cory and Topanga here. "Why didn't you say anything to me? You knew my mom was gone and my dad was in and out. Don't you think I would've understood and that it would bring us closer together?"
"I'm sure it would've, but I didn't want to be closer together…at least not because of that. I wanted to be closer to you and have a relationship because of who we were as individuals, not because of the people who left. You can't build a relationship on loss and dwelling on what's missing."
"But not talking about it isn't healthy either," Cory interjected, earning him an elbow in the ribs from his fiancée. "Ow!"
"We could've talked about it because we both know how it feels to be left by someone who was supposed to be there no matter what." So many of their previous conversations replayed in Shawn's head- it all made sense now. This was why she understood him so well. Angela always seemed to know what to say and when not to say anything. She had known exactly what he was going through because not only had she been there, but got through it at a younger age. "We could've helped each other. If I would've known I never-"
"You never what, never would've broken up with me? You would've stayed with me even though you weren't getting what you needed out of our relationship and decide to find yourself?"
"Well…I don't know. Maybe."
"There's a great love story for the ages- someone staying out of pity."
"It wouldn't have been pity. It would've been another sign that we're meant to be- it is a sign. We get each other and were brought together for a reason. Maybe I wouldn't have felt off last year and felt like I had to find myself if you would have-"
"And there you go again, twisting things around and making it my fault." She shook her head. "I've got to go. I still have things to do before classes start tomorrow."
"Angela," Cory called out, ignoring Topanga's glare. "There's just one thing I have to know. It's going to drive me crazy otherwise."
"I'm probably going to regret this. But what?"
"Why did your mom call you June bug?"
She nearly smiled she was so relieved it was an easy question. "My birthday is in June and when I was a baby my eyes looked too big for my face."
/
/
"…and Rachel heard all about the bet."
"Ouch. Poor Rachel." Angela leaned against the counter containing the various pastries that were left at the end of the day. "How is she doing?"
"She's not talking to me or Jack right now and Jack is pissed at me."
"Why?"
"I'm the one who mentioned the bet."
"I'm sorry."
Eric waved off her sympathy. "I'm sure it will work itself out…eventually I hope." He, too, leaned against the counter and was mere inches away from Angela. "It sounds like we both had sucky days."
"Right now is going well," she said with a smile. "Definite improvement."
"You're just saying that because I gave you the rest of the orange scones that were going to be tossed at the end of the night," he teased.
"Maybe a little bit." She checked the time and realized it was getting late. "I guess I should go and let you finish up here," She made no move to leave.
"I have the afternoon shift tomorrow." He came out from behind the counter and stood right in front of her. "So, if you come in around... say two o'clock there just might be a free cup of iced coffee with your name on it waiting behind the counter."
"Wow, it pays to have friends in high places."
"Totally. And who knows, if you play your cards right there could be a cheese Danish hanging around, too."
"So the coffee doesn't get lonely?"
He chuckled. It was nice having someone in on his jokes. It was nice having someone who didn't think he was a joke. "Careful, some people might say you've been spending too much time with me."
"I'll be the judge of that." Angela thought about it for all of a few seconds before she leaned forward and kissed his cheek.
"Can I tell you something without you thinking it's weird?"
"Sure."
"I missed you today."
She smiled, touched that he felt comfortable enough to admit it. "Why would that be weird?" He shrugged and looked at everything except her. "I missed you, too. I'll see you, the coffee, and Danish tomorrow."
"We'll be here." Eric couldn't help but smile as he watched her walk away. The status of their relationship was still up in the air, but at least he had something to look forward to tomorrow. He picked up the tray to resume cleaning. When he turned around he was startled to find Cory standing directly behind him. "Ah!" The tray went flying and the mugs hit the floor. "What the hell is the matter with you, sneaking up like that? You're like that last scene in a horror movie where you think it's safe and then bam! Killer in your face."
He crouched down to help pick up the mess. "Sorry, I wasn't trying to scare you."
"Cor, even my shadow isn't that close to me. What do you want?"
"I need to talk to you." He had watched the entire exchange between his brother and Angela and didn't like it one bit.
"So talk."
He followed Eric to the counter. "Do you have to keep cleaning?"
"Yes."
"You can't stop for just a minute?"
"Nope." He turned away from his brother to load the dirty mugs into the dishwasher. "Now talk or get out."
"I want you to stop whatever you're doing with Angela." He took a step back when he heard the remaining mugs hit the counter. Eric was standing perfectly still, yet the tension coming from him was palpable. "You know, you guys...it's not right." When he turned around Cory was taken aback by the look on his face. He was more serious than Cory had witnessed in a long time.
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You know how much Shawn still loves her. Has he screwed up massively in showing it? Yes, but he does and you know that."
"Mind your own business. Shawn and Angela broke up months ago. He's the one that did it."
"I know and he wants to make it right, but that's never going to happen if you try to start something."
"She's free to make her own choices. Trust me, I'm not doing anything with Angela that she doesn't want me to do." He was being deliberately vague. The more vague things were, the more Cory's mind could jump to insane conclusions and Eric had to get his fun in somewhere.
"How are you not understanding this? Shawn wants her back. Please don't stand in the way of that. Think of the consequences."
"What consequences?"
"Shawn will be miserable and-"
"Oh, right, and that should be everyone's main goal: making Shawn happy."
"Good," he said through a sigh of relief, "I'm glad we're on the same page."
"That was sarcasm, Cor."
"You don't want Shawn to be happy?"
"Sure, in that same way I hope for world peace- I want everyone to be happy. But his personal happiness is not my number one priority in life."
He shook his head, unable to believe how selfish Eric was being. "And where does Angela's happiness rank on your list of priorities?"
"Goodnight, Cory."
"She's out of your league anyway."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"Angela's too...she's cultured. She likes literature, poetry, classical music, and art."
"A lot of people like that stuff. I like art. And you know, once you realize how much classical music is in movies it's really not that bad because at least you can picture the scenes in your head when you're listening to it."
"I'm not talking about a Dr. Seuss, Mother Goose, and finger painting level of culture here. Hey, why don't you find a girl who's into that?"
"Is that what you think of me: Dr. Seuss and finger painting?"
"Well...yeah. Find a girl who likes that stuff, too. I'm sure she's out there."
Eric didn't know what to say. Sure, it wasn't completely Cory's fault that he thought his big brother was an idiot, but it still hurt. Did a year or two of craziness erase everything that came before? "Goodnight, Cory."
"Wait a minute."
"What?"
"No matter how loopy you act I've always been able to depend on you to do the right thing when it counted. That's all I'm asking you to do right now. Think of Shawn. Think of how this could put a wedge in our group of friends when we're forced to choose sides. Why would you want to put everyone through that for a relationship that- let's be honest- is probably just a fling and won't last? So, come on, Eric, be the guy I know you still are inside and do the right thing."