Look Like the Solar Opposites are Going to Play Dungeons and Dragons
(Without further ado, this is it for the family to go on a quest in a land of Dungeons and Dragons.)
After getting some rest ordered by Phoebe, Korvo was working on the ship, but secretly he was working on a personal project. To make sure nobody will bother him, he asks the family to help out. Their response "having to work on a project with a friend" "Something better to do" and "I'm too busy with the housework." Good thing Korvo know his family well, (also the last time Phoebe helped him, he spends the whole time micromanaging her on how to properly screw things in). Now he can get to work and occasionally takes break to not raise any suspicion.
Two days later, the moment has arrived for the team leader to revel his latest project. In the late after everybody got home (including Monica, since her parents are out of town at a taxidermy convention and they trusted the Solar Opposites with their daughter.) Korvo called the family up to the ship as soon as they got there, they saw him stand behind a curtain.
"What's this all about, Korvo?" Phoebe asks, as she is curious about what is behind the curtain. Same with Jesse and Monica.
"What's behind the curtain, Korvo?" Asked the female alien.
"I'm glad you ask, Jessica." Said Korvo as he places his hands on the curtain. "Behind this curtain is the new and improve Ready Player One Device!"
He tears down the curtain and reveal the Ready Player One device (Which He made when he was inspired by that one cool scene in Ready Player One where the characters are transported into The Shining). The only different about that video game consul is that have wires sticking out of it.
"Isn't that the one we use for that Christmas Special, where we play the main character in every Christmas story." Terry pointed out, because the last time they use the device, they lost their Christmas spirits when they didn't finish Jingle All the Way. They try different Christmas stories, but none of them gave them back their Christmas Spirit. It dawns on the Solar Opposites that they have to Go back to Jingle All the Way, but when they got there it was a futuristic, apocalypse, dystopia Jingle All the Way verse. They have to fight through all the chaos and beating the shit out of an evil Jamie to gain back their Christmas spirits.
"Yes Terry, it's the same thing." Stated the team leader. "But I added a few adjustments to it."
"What kind of adjustments?" Asked Monica.
"Instead of just playing as a main character in a movie like that one scene from Ready Player One, you get to be your own character from the classes, races and sub-races of your choosing. I also connect the Ready Player One Device to the holo-deck, so it can have all the information on ever Dungeons and Dragons game ever made." Korvo explained
"Is it safe to use?" Phoebe ask in concern, because she doesn't want her family to be put in harm's way. She also knew that this is some elaborate plot to get Yumyulack back to the family, at least it's not over the top.
"Don't worry about that, because I put a fool-proof safety protocol on it in case something goes wrong or if it gets too intense." Answered the blue alien.
"Is it going to take away our Dungeons and Dragons spirit if we leave the game, before we can finish it." The greyish-blue alien asked, because it does that like with the Jingle all the Way incident. Then there was no way he going to participate.
"Like I said safety-protocol, so to not repeat of last time." Korvo said as he pulled a remote from his robe. "Now with anymore question, let's play some Dungeons and Dragons!"
Before anyone could ask more questions, they were suck into the device the same way as the Christmas special. They teleported to a deserted grassy land, the five heroes were flabbergasted to what was going on. Phoebe on the other hand was a bit pissed off, because she wasn't expected to be in here.
"Korvo, where the hell are we!?" Demanded a miffed nanny.
"Is this part of Dungeons and Dragons?" Jesse asks.
"Not the way my older sister play with her college friend." The young transgender girl pointed out.
"Calm down, everybody. We are just here to create our character." Korvo said.
"What do you mean by that?" The young female alien asks.
"We can't just play the game without creating your own character. The robed alien stated "I appointed AISHA as Dungeon Mistress to help us lead through creating your very own Dungeons and Dragons character and later on lead through the game."
"To make sure you six play the game accordingly." AISHA stated, as her orbed self-appear in front of them. Then she gave each player a floating hologram like computer that can help the players create their own characters.
"I already have a character." Yumyulack pointed out.
"Then put it in the game." The AI responded. Everybody started to create their character and sometime have to help them out. Korvo choose Wizard (obviously) and the School Evocation, Terry choose Bard and the College of Glamour, Jesse choose Cleric and she is a worshipper of Eldath, and Yumyulack choose Rogue who was an Assassin, now a Bounty Hunter. All of them are Shlorpians, because AISHA allows it and aliens exist in this universe. Phoebe choose Barbarian, Berserker and remain human, Monica choose Ranger and Vigilante, she also, half-human, half-tiefling.
After they got done, they were automatically changed to different outfits. Korvo is wearing a wizard outfit that looks like the one from Lord of The Rings and Korvo looks brave and leaderly. Phoebe's costume is amazing and extreme like other Vikings, she is so fierce, violent but loyal to her family. Terry's outfit is like a goofy jester but it looks amazing and stylish and he is very harmonious and good at singing. Yumyulack's costume is very extreme and bad-boy levels and he is very fierce and loyal and ready to kick some ass. Jesse's costume is like a kind princess and pretty too. She is very sweet, kind and caring. Monica's outfit is like a brave elf warrior girl. She is so brave, yet feels untrustworthy due to trust issues but she is longing for companionship. The gang, except for Korvo were admiring their new outfits
"Not bad." Commented Monica as she admired how she looks.
"Hell yeah! We look fucking awesome!" Agreed Yumyulack.
"I wish you stop using that kind of language in front of me, but I agree." Agreed Phoebe, as she is admiring her axe-hammer combo.
"Agree!" Stated Korvo, holding his staff.
The groups are Terry/Siegfried Tiddlywinks: A carefree bard, who focus more on partying than on his studies. He is an outcast and a slacker in his village, but when the chips are down he's a reliable ally. Skill in spells and fighting, Siegfried relies highly more on his musical skills to do the job.
Korvo/Odrimorn Spellcraft: He was top of his class in the School of Evocation in his small village and the sole survivor of a massacre lead by a corrupted king. He saw his village burn to the ground along with his family, he blamed himself for letting it happen. He left his burn down home with the clothes on his back and the thought of avenging his husband and kids' death.
Yumyulack/Vinto Daggerfield: Once a worthy member of the grasslands Assassin, gone rogue and abandon all that for his own personal gain. Now Vinto's a bounty hunter, collecting in the good and turning in punks, dead or alive. He will do the best he can to get him out of tough situation even if it means double crossing allies. Vinto carry on him daggers, hand crossbow and hidden blades on his wrist. He got the skills of a Rogue.
Jesse/Graciela Goodharts: She was born to a group of pacifists and peace keepers, but Graciela, a healing priestess in training have a taste for adventure. Adventure called out to her in a dream, saying that she is destined for greater good. She packs up and left for her destiny. She's a great healer, but lack in combat. Because of her pacifist ways and her disorgination in her bag.
Monica/Winter Redraven: Bastard child of a human nobleman and Concubine Tiefling, she is seen as a disgrace to both Human and Tiefling, earning the nickname Halfbreed. Winter learns to survive on her own, living on nuts, berries and animals she hunts down. Her Tiefling heritage make her an excellent archer and hunter, at day and night. She does have some trust issues, but wish for companionship.
Phoebe/Thirteash the Barbarian: Left for dead by her family as a young child, she was taken in and raised by barbarian Ogres. Thirteash was raised in their way of fighting and protecting those worth saving. She is very mistrusting towards other humans, because of their mistreatments of mythical creatures and anyone who is different. She is known to go in a violent rage when someone she loves is harm in anyway and is skilled in hand to hand combat and weapons.
"Since this is your first time playing for some of you, all of you are on level eight and descent enough levels for skill sets." The AI pointed out.
"Sounds good to me!" Agreed Terry, "So when do we start playing?"
"Right now!" Stated the Dungeon Mistress as she changes the background to a more forest setting, with a sign that said "Welcome to Blorbbaria".
"Welcome to Blorbbaria?" Monica read aloud in confusion.
"I want to see you try to make up a name some fantasy land!" Stated AISHA in defense.
"Wait! Where's the Pupa!?" Phoebe said in a panic tone, when she realizes that the Pupa isn't with them. Turns out they left Pupa behind and he is sitting on the couch, playing video games and eating Terry's flaming hot Cheetos.
"I'm sure he's fine!" Terry stated nonchalantly, Phoebe want to argue back. But he does make a point, since Pupa a capable of taking care of himself, more than Terry can. "Now let dungeons some dragons!"
"Terry's right for once in his life, let's go!" Korvo pointed out, he motions the other to follow him and Terry. "The sooner we get going the sooner we can return home or be stuck here forever."
"We'll be what!?" Phoebe exclaimed in shock, Korvo than realize he let a secret slip out and started to goobling.
"I mean…" Korvo started off till he notices some rustling in the bushes, he took it as an opportunity to distract the other. "Oh no, it looks like we are about to be rob us!"
"Don't go changing the subject to save your own ass!" The angry barbarian pointed out.
"That's probably a small animal or whatever they have here."
Suddenly a couple of humanoid hyenas known as gnolls (which Yumyulack talk about) came out of the bushes with melees weapons. Phoebe eyes-widen at this, because Korvo was right. The taller one with the knife approach them slightly.
"Alright, let's make it quick and easy and hand over your supplies and valuable and we might spare you all." Demanded the head gnolls.
"Why would we do that? Since there 7 of us and only 2 of you!" The barbarian pointed out as she put her ax-hammer up in defense.
"We have our way." Stated the leader as he looks smug, which confuse some of the heroes. Monica heard some rustling coming from the trees and an arrow being drawn. Before she could warn her friends, arrows were shot from 4 directions. Two misses the heroes, one grazed Phoebe's left arm and one shot into Yumyulack's right shoulder from behind. The young bounty hunter fell to his knees in pain, touching the place that was bleeding. Jesse rushes to her brother's side, Phoebe saw this unfold and all she could feel was pure rage that these bastards dare hurt one of her precious children. She raised her axe-hammer weapon, charge at the leader of the Gnolls bandits and slashes him from his right shoulder to his left hip. The leader (who didn't have a chance to defend himself) upper half slip off in a bloody fashion, some of the blood got on Phoebe. But Phoebe did not care at the slightest as she slams the hammer at the next gnolls who was frozen from shock in the gut. The force was strong enough to tear up the hyena humanoid's intestine some of the blood got on the barbarian, but she doesn't care. She continues to smash her hammer in the beast stomach repeatedly.
The other (san Jesse and Monica) where shock at what they saw, even though they are used to Phoebe's violent tendencies. But they never seen her react like that this before, going straight into bloodshed right away. Monica took care most of the gnolls with her archery skills, all except for the one in the tree who seem to be struggling with his bow and arrow. Jesse was able to get the arrow out of Yumyulack's shoulder, this cause him to curse out loudly. "OUCH! THAT FUCKING HURT, JESSE!"
"Sorry! I want to heal your wounds properly and I can't it with the arrow in the way!" The healer loudly apologizes as she put her hand near the wound and begin using her healing power, this cause the bounty hunter to hiss in pain as he was being healed.
The last gnoll was about to strike again, the tiefling-human hybrid shoot him in the left shoulder, causing the gnoll archer to fall out on the tree flat in his back. The bandit was able to composed quickly, but was confronted by the barbarian who was looking at him with murderous intent. He immediately tries to crawl away backward from the angry nanny who was approaching him slowly while raising her bloody weapon. The bandit was beginning to beg for his life, but he already signed his death wish when he decided to mess with one of her children. The Solar Opposites just stood there and cringe (san Yumyulack, obviously and Monica who is missing) as she begins to brutalized the bandit who begin to scream in agony, follow by gory noises. Phoebe begin to calm down after the carnage, she notices the looks everybody was looking at her. Before they can say anything, Monica came out of nowhere.
"Guys! You got to see it!" Stated an excited vigilante as she leads her group in the forest into a campsite, probably belonging to the gnoll bandits. It has stolen loots like few treasures, elixirs and a couple of hat of disguise.
"Great work, Winter!" Congratulated The wizard of the group. "Alright adventurers, let's get looting !"
Everybody didn't argue about this order and take what they can car. Jesse and Phoebe didn't voice their moral view, since these loots were up for grabs. Monica found a speak potion and quickly took a drink from it, until it's gone. It left a bitter taste in her mouth, but it will be worth it later on. The group continue their walk to the until they found a nearby village, where there was a couple of wanted posters of Phoebe and Monica for their rebellion against the evil king's rule.
"We should've expect this, since we choose are characters that stick it to the man." Winter raven pointed out she then brought out the hats and handed one to Thirsteash. "I guess we you and me have to wear the hats of disguise to blend in. And don't take them off until be are in the clear."
"How do you some much about Dungeons and Dragons when you never play it before?" Asked the rogue of the group.
"Just like Korvo, I did my researches and I have an older sister who love to blab about the Dungeons and Dragons." Answered the archer. The two girls put on the hat and they are altered to look like any background characters you see in the shows or movies. The group enter the villages, everybody was on their toes so they can find what they are looking for. Phoebe make sure Terry doesn't make any impulsive purchases with the loots they got and only allow to buy couple of food and that is it. They stop in there track when they notice the villagers starting to clear a way, they turn around they see some mysterious hooded Blood Hunter on horseback. They clear the way themselves hiding behind a couple barrels.
"It's Sir Chad Ghostslayer!" Murmur a few villagers as they stay clear of the serious threat in front of them.
"Sir Chad Ghostslayer?" Repeated Korvo quietly, like the name itself leave a bad taste in his mouth. "What kind of person come up with a fuckboy name like that?"
Korvo got his answer to his question when the mysterious individual lowers his hoodie, revealing his identity, much to the bit of shock and annoyance from the Solar Opposites (minus, Yumyulack, Monica and Phoebe who never met the person before).
"Fuck! Anyone but him!" Whined the bard of the group, showing it was none of than Vanbo who was the mysterious Blood Hunter
"What up, Futt Buckers!" Vanbo greeted the villagers in his usual alpha male sort of way.
(Look like the Solar opposites have a lot on their plate this time. Also, sorry for the long wait.)