The streets were dimly lit as they slowly made their way through the slumbering village; the light layer of snow their only company as it crunched under foot. The steady puffs of air that escaped from Sakura materialising in the cold night air was the only proof Kakashi had that she was still present, her silence becoming a concerning companion.
Hands stuffed in pockets, Kakashi tried to emulate his usual careless stroll, but the unspoken questions between them weighed heavily. His own mind swirling in possibilities and questions, he imagined Sakura to be experiencing a similar reaction. He had had some contact with Sasuke in the past, usually in the form of a scrawled report sent via summons. Once or twice before, he had appeared to him for some favour or another, but never had he alerted his presence to anyone else in the village. Save for a few scant letters to his former teammates over the years, sparse and vague as they were, Sasuke had remained almost achingly careful in the distance he maintained with them. As though scared his mere presence would taint them… Sakura especially. But now this?
Part of him was ready to rejoice at the fact that Sasuke had finally seen fit to reveal himself to Sakura again, and include her in on his whereabouts. Another deeper part of him felt wary and momentarily protective of his pink-haired medic, but he banished that feeling most immediately.
However, something felt off about Sasuke tonight, and his refusal to share his intentions sent warning bells through Kakashi's analytical mind. A good shinobi sought underneath the underneath; but it appeared that Sasuke had taken his lesson to heart and grown adept in concealing his 'underneath'. Kakashi resisted the urge to wipe a hand across his face. He just couldn't figure out Sasuke's motives this time. It seems he picked up more than just the Chidori from him, and for that Kakashi was vaguely disgruntled. He couldn't quite read him anymore, not that it ever helped when he still could, but that was years ago now. Why did Sasuke have to take after his affinity for masks…
Arriving at Sakura's apartment door, Kakashi fought to find some words of comfort to offer her, observing her tentative pause. But she beat him to it.
"I don't know what to think Kakashi." her voice was steadier than her anticipated. "What does he want? Why me? And why the hell was he being so stubborn?"
"I don't know Sakura." He replied honestly, not feeling in the mood for his usual aloof reassurances. They'd both had enough detached responses for tonight.
"I thought I had moved on." She started quietly, pink tendrils of hair hiding her eyes from his view as she studied the ground. "I made peace with his distance. He would come back when he was ready. I've built a life for myself here, my friends, the hospital, Naruto, Sai, Ino, you. And a perfect space, waiting for him here. I'm content Kakashi." She paused. "So why am I feeling this compulsion to drop everything and leave the village for him?"
She was angry, and in a twisted way, Kakashi felt relieved. But whilst her tone was dipped in frustration, her words were still painted with compassion. No, she wasn't the same twelve-year old girl who blindly chased after a hardened, lost boy to the ends of the world. That version of Sakura had long since developed. He'd seen it; he's lived its evolution. He was enjoying the woman on the other side of their shared past. But it was that same woman who still held a strong devotion to her teammates, regardless of the pain they'd all inflicted on her in some way, shape or form. How could Kakashi deem Sakura foolish for wanting to help Sasuke, when he'd been reaping the rewards of her forgiveness and generosity for years now?
Kakashi ran a hand through his hair scrounging his brain for an appropriate response, and settled for the truth.
"Because you are a kind-hearted person, Sakura. You cannot ignore a call for help; you prove that every day you go to work and go above and beyond for your patients, and your friends. Sasuke is no exception. He holds a very frustrating little place in all our hearts, and it's only natural to want to have a teammates' back. It's our shinobi way."
Kakashi could see the fight leave her body, replaced by a tired mass of defeat.
"Please don't make me choose Kakashi… between the village and him…"
Her voice was pleading; for what outcome, he couldn't quite guess and figured she didn't really know either. He rested one hand on her shoulder, and used the other to lift her chin, coaxing her to look him in the eye.
"I won't. Now get some sleep." With a gentle squeeze, he dropped his arms, and watched her disappear into her apartment.
Kakashi returned his hands to his pockets and hung his head back to consult the sky, welcoming the small specks of ice that pricked against his skin. Naruto's succession of becoming Hokage could not come soon enough. Sending a silent prayer up to whoever was listening, Kakashi decided that tonight he would run home.
Kicking off her shoes in the entryway, Sakura all but collapsed onto her couch when she got home. She wanted nothing more than to sleep off the after effects of Sasuke, which was beginning to feel more and more like an adrenaline crash. She was halfway done removing her jacket when she felt it, the same quietly powerful, electric chakra she recognised as Sasuke. Her suspicions were quickly confirmed by his low rumbling voice as he appeared before her in the dark apartment.
"Don't be alarmed. I'm just here to talk."
Sakura furrowed her brow and eyed him up and down as he stood, finding no threat to his presence. She almost took the opportunity to appreciate he had adopted a new, strategically styled haircut to hide one of his eyes, and was wrapped in an unassuming brown cloak. An unusually understated look for the prideful Uchiha she noted dryly. What, no fan?
"How did you get in here?" she settled for asking, slightly defensively.
"The village security is overwhelmingly laxed. Your apartment included. The seals and traps were easy to bypass… You also haven't changed your lock since last I was here." The last part was said with a strange softness that Sakura deemed she was entirely too tired to contemplate.
She let out a weary sigh. "What do you want Sasuke-kun?" She didn't notice her slip of the tongue.
Sasuke however did, and he couldn't decide if it helped or hurt him more. He took a careful step forward, searching her eyes for permission before he spoke quietly, "How is your hand?"
There was a gentleness to him as he reached for her, running calloused fingers over her knuckles. Startled by his gesture and sudden closeness, Sakura carefully withdrew her hand, "I'm fine Sasuke."
Why did his touch always feel electric on her skin?
She didn't know whether to be affronted or touched to think he thought he'd hurt her. She settled for indifferent. Indifference was a safe space, Sasuke practically lived there. Not that she wanted to live there with Sasuke but… Ugh. Quiet brain. Too tired!
Sasuke's momentarily open expression hardened back into an apathetic mask at her withdrawal, and Sakura tried not to lament the loss. Their relationship had developed this odd tension over the years, and it was becoming clear that despite the distance, neither knew how to define it still.
In the initial year after his return, they all had their fair share of bumps to iron out as a team. Most between Sasuke and Naruto were resolved with fists; with Sakura close by to heal and scold them respectively. Yamato and Sai had wormed their way cautiously into Sasuke's good but limited graces, and they held a genial, if polite friendship between the three. Although, unsurprisingly Sai had the uncanny ability to annoy Sasuke into days of agitated silence with his unfortunate nicknames and offhanded comments. Those were the days.
She didn't know what exactly Kakashi and Sasuke spoke about in their monthly 'meetings', but she had a feeling it went beyond just a Hokage checking on his prohibited shinobi – especially if their mutually peaceful post-brooding was anything to go by.
And as for herself, well. They basically had to start from scratch. She was able to take a small comfort in the fact he would let no one but her heal him, let alone touch him; even if it did prove frustrating on her busier days. And he was far more conversational with her than anyone else on the team, aside from his quips with Naruto. They were friends, undoubtedly. She respected his space and kept clear boundaries, and he would return the favour by initiating small offers of friendship – like responding to her in full sentences and even eating her experimental tomato riceballs without complaint despite her drastically wrong measurements.
And then he left. He was kind, but stoic and gave her a vague promise and more affection than she'd ever seen from him, which left her more confused than encouraged. She held hope, but for what, she was no longer sure. She loves him, like she loves all her boys, but she wasn't going to let herself fall again unless she was certain he would catch her. Unless he wanted her. It would be unfair to both of them otherwise, she had decided. If friendship was all he wanted from her, she could give him that. And yet, that strange tension between them remained. Unnameable. Even after all this time, and their small correspondents, how could it still be there, lingering?
So maybe she was feeling a little annoyed with him currently, or at least their unchanged situation. He was as enigmatic as ever, and perhaps she was still a little pissed he hadn't replied to her or Naruto's letters in six months! Kami, it was too late to be thinking about this still.
Sakura was drawn out of her inward groaning by Sasuke clearing his throat awkwardly.
"I wanted to apologise for earlier." He sounded out the words slowly.
She shook her head tiredly. Sasuke was certainly more verbal now, but he would always be one of the more socially awkward members of their team, after Sai of course. And that was saying something.
"It's fine Sasuke, really." She reassured, subtly noting him shift at her words.
He seemed relieved, albeit still ruminating in guilt, which he tried to mask with an air of confidence. She supposed she was becoming used to this side of Sasuke. Kami knows he had done his fair share of discomfited apologising in recent years, it was almost endearing.
Yet, she was still having trouble reconciling the fact her was standing here, in her living room. She couldn't even begin to the process the turn of events happening in the last 30 minutes or so.
He was here? In Konoha, in her apartment, apologising for hurting her when he appeared in the Hokage's office asking for her to be assigned to him? She didn't know what to feel. Joy in his return, frustration at his lack of tact, touched by his sympathy, irritation that he still seemed to carry his stubborn arrogance around with him like a damn badge. She could figure out her feelings another night. Curiosity and relief to have him home urged her to hear what he had to say.
Letting out a deep exhale she turned to make her way to the kitchen. "I was just going to make some tea, would you like – "
Before the words could leave her mouth, Sasuke flashed in front of her, eyes glowing. Sakura felt a familiar sharp pressure in her chest, pulsing through her body with immediate effect. Consciousness became fleeting and Sakura recognised a fraction too late what it all meant before her world was plunged into an all-encompassing darkness.
Sasuke caught her awkwardly as her body went limp against his. Cradling her midsection, he carried her to the couch and carefully he set her down. Entering her bedroom, he made quick work of locating her emergency mission pack, but paused upon seeing the happy snapshots that decorated her walls. Snapshots of a life she'd lived without him…happily by the looks of it.
Sasuke grit his teeth. He could do this. He had to. She would forgive him. She always did.
Adjusting her pack to his back, he returned to Sakura and located her shoes. Gently easing them back on, he moved to softly zip up her winter jacket. His fingertips brushed the edges of her jaw and his eyes looked up to linger on her face for a moment. Peaceful, healthy, lovely. He resisted the urge to stroke her pinkened cheeks. She seemed to grow more beautiful every time he saw her.
He shook his head before gathering her up and carefully hoisting her over his shoulder. He really hoped she wouldn't be too mad when she woke up, he really did need her. With a deep sigh and a final glance, Sasuke flash stepped out of the village, his precious cargo in tow.