Poison Ivy

Ch 17

DIMITRI

Friday

It was Friday and I hadn't talked to Rose in three days. I had left her alone at her request and hadn't tried to contact her. I knew she was ok, as ok as she could be under the circumstances. Alberta had texted me letting me know that Rose was holed up in her apartment and that she and Celeste had been taking her meals. I wanted to talk to her so badly and try to explain to her how sorry I was. I knew Adrian was in a downward spiral as well. At least since that night he hadn't picked up any alcohol. He had been going to AA meetings the last couple of days and we hadn't seen him at the office.

It had been a weird work week and I was glad it was over. I definitely needed a couple days off to reflect and get my head back on straight. Ivan was moving out and into Tasha's place over the weekend. This was his first big boy relationship and I was happy for him, but sad for myself. For the first time in my life I will be living alone. It was going to be an adjustment for us both.

I was waiting for the clock to turn five so I could get out of here. It had been weird being in the office with Mazer after our conversation on Wednesday.

WEDNESDAY

"Dimitri, can I see you in my office?" I nodded my head and followed Mazer to his office. All the while Ivan just had this oh shit look on his face.

"Have a seat." I quickly sat down while he shut the door and locked it. He came over to his desk and sat down across from me.

"Is everything ok?"

"I hear my son made a complete ass out of himself last night?"

"I wouldn't quite use those words."

"He was an ass. I told him not to say anything to you and to leave her alone till I got things figured out. I've already dealt with him, but what I really want to know is how Rose is doing?"

"I haven't talked to her since last night. She slammed the door in my face and told me she never wanted to see me again."

"Sounds just like her mother. She was the only one who could put up with me and put me in my place at the same time." He laughed.

"That is definitely Rose, I've only known her for a short time, but she has definitely put me in my place a couple of times."

"I know this may be awkward, but can I ask how things are going between you two? Well before last night? I'm just finding out about her, but that's still my daughter and you better take care of her. If you ever break her heart you know what I can do."

"I know and I've been trying to Mr. Mazer. I know it's early, but I can really see a future with her."

"Good, you have my blessing to date Rose. I know you were raised to be a good man. Any father would be happy to have you date their daughter."

"Thank you sir."

"Don't sir me, we may be related one day."

ROSE

Friday

"Please Roza, just let me explain." That was the last thing Dimitri said to me.

I didn't want to hear his explanation. He knew, he knew and didn't tell me. I told him I didn't want to see him and not to call or text me. That was three days ago.

"My boss recognized a picture of your mother from your file."

"I've seen the pictures."

"I wasn't trying to keep anything from you."

Over and over I kept replaying everything that was said.

"Please don't blame this on Dimitri."

I just wanted to be alone.

"You finally have the family you've always wanted. Just give him a chance."

That was the last time I talked to Lissa, what she said was like a knife to my heart. I promptly hung up the phone and then turned it off. I haven't talked to anyone since. Except Alberta and Celeste. They have been dropping meals at my door to make sure I eat.

Dimitri had honored my wishes and left me alone. I didn't know if I should be upset or relieved that he did. I was really starting to like this guy and honestly trust him and trust was a big deal for me.

I was sitting on my couch cuddled in the blanket that Dimtiri had wrapped me in when he came over. It still smelled a little like him and it made me sad. I don't know how many times I grabbed my phone to text him, but stopped every time.

Yesterday I had a virtual appointment with my therapist. I needed to talk to someone that was completely neutral to the whole situation. She gave me some good things to think about and homework to write in my journal. She had me start a journal after our first session, as a way to get my feelings out. She said it was up to me what I did with that journal. I liked the idea of writing letters to people and then burning them to help let go. I had already written one to Jesse and promptly burned that mother fucker. Did it help? A little, I still had so much pent up anger towards him.

I was deep in my feelings when I heard a knock on the door. I got up not thinking about who would be at the door. Celeste had already brought me breakfast and it was about lunch time. I didn't even look through the peephole to see who it was and I wish I did. Because standing on the other side was Adrian, my "brother".

I tried to shut the door as soon as I noticed who it was, but he put his foot out stopping my door.

"Please, just give me five minutes." I looked at him and could tell he had been crying. I also noticed he had a photo album in his hands. This wasn't what I wanted to deal with today, but if I was ever going to move on I needed to. I reluctantly opened the door and ushered him inside. I directed him over to the couch where I was sitting and sat down.

"Thank you, for giving me a chance to explain myself." He sat down on the other side of the couch and faced me.

"I want to start off by apologizing, I was drunk and should have never come to the restaurant. When I found out the possibility of having a half sister I was excited. Then all the memories from my childhood came rushing back. I was devastated when your mom left us. I was only three and didn't understand what was going on. I thought I had done something wrong to make her leave just like my biological mom did. I'm not the best at handling my emotions so I turned to the one thing that has helped me through, alcohol. I know it isn't an excuse for how I acted, but I am very sorry. And as of today I'm three days sober."

"I'm glad to hear you are sober." And I genuinely was happy for him. I'm not going to say I haven't spent many nights lost in the sauce.

"I was going on six months before this screw up. I'm determined to make amends to everyone I hurt that night and stay sober."

"I accept your apology and hope you can stay sober."

"Thank you, I really screwed up and you accepting my apology means alot to me." He handed me the photo album.

"Here, I know these may be hard to look at and you don't have to. But this is the best way for me to show you" The album felt like it weighed a ton in my hands. I wasn't sure I was ready to see pictures of my mom with another child. Plus on the pages were going to be pictures of my dad. That was one of the big elephants in the room, my dad. He has always been a curiosity to me, never knowing his name, if he was alive, or if he even knew about me.

"How about I show you one of my favorite pictures." I couldn't answer so I just shook my head yes. He took the album and found what he was looking for. Putting it back in my lap, right there in front of me was all the proof I needed. A picture of my mom, dad, and brother. Looking at the man that had his arm wrapped around her I saw so much of myself. I had his hair, chin, eye color, and smile. She had Adrian on her hip and they all had huge smiles on their faces.

"This was us at the zoo. It was one of the last things that the three of us did together. I had so much fun that I fell asleep on the way home while eating my ice cream." He turned the page to another picture of him in the car with melted ice cream all over. I wanted to cry, he got the childhood I always wanted with my mother. I don't know how many times I asked her to take me to the zoo and she always had an excuse not to go.

"You don't know how many times I asked her to take me to the zoo. She never would, she never did anything with me."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you."

"It's not your fault you got the mother I always wanted. It's hard to see she did have it in her to be a good mom, she just chose not to."

"Sorry." I scooted closer to him and grabbed his hands.

"Stop apologizing. This is a shit situation and it's neither of our faults. We both had crappy mothers."

"I guess that's something we can bond on." He laughed and then I laughed. It felt good to have another emotion besides crying.

"How about we start over. Hi I'm Adrian. Nice to meet you."

"Rose, nice to meet you too."