Chapter 36: Confessions

Author: zeusfluff.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Blue Blood's characters. They belong to CBS. I do own all originals. Date Started: 11/21/23. Date Finished: 11/26/23. Enjoy!

Eddie couldn't sleep. She knew she should be asleep because Cora would be up for her nightly shriek-fest strongly asking to be fed. Turning her head, she saw Jamie thrashing about in his sleep, and then he shot up stock straight, gasping for breath. Even in the dark, she could make out his silhouette. Turning on the lamp on her bed side table, she could see the distressed and drawn expression on his face.

"You ok bub?"

Jamie swallowed and nodded.

"I'm fine babe."

Eddie could see right through him though.

"Talk to me bub. Now what is it? Bad dream?"

Eddie pulled Jamie into her arms and placed a kiss to his left shoulder. Jamie stared at an invisible crack in the wall by their bedroom door.

"There's just been a lot of work lately and its been a little overwhelming. My patient caseload is higher than it has been. Normally that wouldn't be such a bad thing. But a lot of the other OB's have just quit and walked away, or they were suffering from burn out. We work long hours. I've accepted that. We have higher malpractice suits than any other specialty. I delivered this beautiful and healthy little girl the other day. Her right shoulder got stuck on the way into the world. I freed her, but in the process, I almost dropped her. I've never dropped any baby I've delivered in my whole career."

Eddie kissed the side of Jamie's neck and rested her chin on his left shoulder.

"But you didn't drop her bub. She's healthy. She's alive and it's all because of you. I know your having some serious doubts right now. But we all have your back. Just like you all have mine. Now, come on bub, what was your nightmare about?"

Eddie felt Jamie's body relax against hers. Then a sob escaped his mouth.

"I can't… I mean I don't know how to put it into words."

Feeling his sobs against her body, Eddie rocked him somewhat and kissed his head.

"It's ok babe. Take your time. No rush."

Jamie took a breath in and let it out slowly. Still staring at the invisible crack by the bedroom door, he began retelling his nightmare.

"I was at the hospital. You went into labor early with our 5th child. 26 weeks. She was so tiny. We named her Bridget. She had such a weak cry. She came out of you, you bled out. I lost you."

Eddie pulled Jamie closer to her and kissed his head again.

"Babe look at me. I'm ok. I'm alive. It was just a bad dream."

Pulling away, Jamie looked into Eddie's eyes.

"I'm going to check on Cora."

Eddie wanted to go with him, but she knew to give him some space. She listened to him speak over the baby monitor on the bed side table.

"Hi baby girl. Daddy just wanted to make sure you were ok. Clearly you are, but daddy wanted to make sure. Only because daddy had a really bad dream about mommy. Daddy doesn't want to lose either one of you."

Eddie swallowed the lump in her throat and turned onto her left side. Her eyes shifted to the door when Jamie came in with a fussy Cora. Sitting up, Eddie held out her arms and Jamie placed Cora gently in them. Helping her get situated, Jamie sat for a moment and watched Cora nurse. Running a hand over her tiny head, she cooed at him.

"I love being here with the two of you. It's these quiet moments between the three of us that I want to remember the most. On Monday, I'm teaching a Lamaze class."

Eddie felt a smirk come to her face.

"Well Doctor Reagan. The next kid we have, I'll be sure to sign up for that class."

Jamie gave a soft laugh and shook his head.

"When you sign up for the next class and our second baby is on the way, I won't be able to teach it. I'm your partner remember?"

Eddie sighed and placed a kiss to Cora's forehead.

"Daddy is already planning for your next brother or sister. Your only 4 months old. Mommy wants to wait at least until you are a little over a year before she decides to give you another brother or sister."

Jamie gave another soft laugh and ran his hand over Cora's hand one more time.

"Fair enough babe. I'm beat. When's she's done eating, let's go back to sleep. She'll be up again soon enough."

Eddie gave Jamie a tired smile and watched as Cora slowly started to nod off, signaling to her that she was done eating. She was about to get up after she straightened herself out, when Jamie put a hand on her shoulder. Taking it away, he kissed it.

"I've got her. I'll go put her down and get her settled."

Eddie smiled and pulled the covers over her, leaning up against the headboard. She felt herself drifting off to sleep when she felt the right side of the bed dip and Jamie climb into bed next to her, pulling her into his arms. A warm soft kiss to the back of her neck. She felt his left hand gently graze her left side. Sighing, she opened her eyes.

"Jamie… Not yet…"

Giving him a soft smile, she felt him kiss her forehead and lie down on the bed, pulling her down next to him. Shutting the light off, Eddie scooted closer to Jamie, spooning him. He whispered in her ear.

"It's ok babe. When you're ready. No rush."

Eddie felt her eyes closing. She loved Jamie more than anything. Opening her eyes one more time, she turned her head towards Jamie.

"It's not that I don't want to, I'm just too tired tonight. We both are. I'll pan something extra special for us. I promise."

That last sentence got Jamie to open his eyes.

"Can I get a little preview?"

Eddie shook her head and smirked into her pillow.

"I promise it's worth the wait."

Shaking her head and settling her head against the pillow again, Eddie imagined Jamie give her puppy dog eyes behind her back. Stifling a laugh, she closed her eyes and let sleep envelope her. It would be worth the wait.

To Be Continued…

A/N: Does this chapter feel kind of empty? Let me know what you guys think! I felt something was missing here.