Hi! So, if you've read any of my other works, this is absolutely nothing like them, but you can take it as a sign that after several years MIA, I'm finally returning to writing. If you haven't read any of my other works, again, they're nothing like this, and as I just previously stated, I've been gone for a while, and now I'm back. *jazz hands* Hooray!

Anyway, this idea sort of hit me out of the blue, and I sort of… had to write it? Hope you enjoy!

And to anyone who reads my other works, I want to extend a heartfelt thank you for being so patient, and even wishing me well or checking in as I've taken time to heal and get help for all I've been through. You all are the best.

One last note: I'm far from an expert on DnD, and I'm certainly no lore master. I know enough to understand that the rules of the franchise make this entire fanfic almost laughably impossible. Normally, I take myself too seriously to even break such deeply established rules in the first place, but this idea inspired me, and that's kind of the whole point of fanfiction, isn't it?

Anyway, that's enough out of me. Hope you enjoy!

Summary: When a god fucks shit up, they call it "the plan all along."

Disclaimer: I do not own anything here. Hasbro, Wizards of the Coast, Critical Role, Amazon, Larian, take your pick for who owns what, but it's all definitely not mine.

Spoilers: Critical Role and Baldur's Gate 3, obviously. How heavy the spoilers get, I'm not sure yet.

A Clerical Error Most Divine

Shadow-Cursed Lands
Camp: Near Moonrise Towers

Gods are neither as infallible nor incomprehensible as they would prefer mortals to believe. Honestly, they spend an inordinate amount of time taking shots at one another, or trying to secure pawns of above average potential before another deity can lock them down, or even steal followers from a fellow god as a power play, as Shar and Selûne often did to one another.

Strength from prayer or souls was the goal, usually. When a hero is "blessed" by a particular god, the public thanks that one a little more than the rest, and they see the dividends down the proverbial road. Clerics put this blessing into action the most directly, of course, but even a simple rogue could find favor in the right god or goddess.

Favor, but perhaps not always favorable in the eyes of some mortals that had survived long enough to know that gods were just con artists with an overabundance of the two most valuable currencies in the realms: power and knowledge.

But again, they still weren't infallible. Just like mortals, gods were absolutely not immune to the occasional mistake. Some were almost famous by now for how often their "grand schemes" fell to pieces. Bhaal in particular caught flak for shitting the bed due to poor planning and worse follow through.

Of course, if you ask the gods, they will always scoff and tell you, "No! I didn't fuck up! It was all part of the plan!" They love to use that line after the dust has settled and everything worked out in their favor, and maybe yours. Never mind that it would have been much better for everyone's health if you knew there was a plan in the first place.

"Naturally, I did not tell you. You have enough burdens already." That one's only if they feel like putting sugar on the bullshit, of course. More likely, they just fill the air with overwhelming power – because they're gods and they can do what they want – and say, "No."

Which... fair. If a god – not some avatar on their behalf, but the deity themself – has no desire to comply, what the fresh hell are you going to do about it?

"No," was the answer Withers had chosen to go with right now, in fact. Because the alternative was an acknowledgement that even one such as the Final Scribe can make the odd… clerical error. To be frank, it's rather impressive that it doesn't happen more frequently. Death and fate, intertwined as they are, and Jergal is supposed to keep tidy records of it in real time? Even a deity such as him would be reduced to a shuffling corpse with this much cosmic paperwork. And that's without the Dead Three and their chosen making such a soulless mess of things.

So yes, in the privacy of his mind, Withers will admit to a slight lapse in focus as he drew the requested hirelings onto the plane of Faerûn. He will acknowledge that this party of rough and tumble adventurers, for all their promise and even the recent victory found in breaking Selûne's daughter free of Shar's shackles, was still in deep over their heads.

And that was why the hirelings he summoned were not mere hirelings at all.

They were veterans. A well-known story of legendary heroes…

"Hey, Pike? What the fuck are we doing here?"

"Great question, big guy. I promise I'll tell you when I figure it out."

"One day, this is gonna happen while someone's pants are down. I'm just saying."

"If it's another tournament in the Hells for a devil's amusement, I'm shooting the devil on principle."

"I know I shouldn't be here – can't be here actually – but holy shit it's good to see you all!"

"Holy shit, brother!"

"Vax!"

And he somehow even brough the bear over as well. Marvelous.

As the entire camp watched their sudden new arrivals practically dogpile onto one particular half-elf with an obvious black and avian aesthetic, Withers was absolutely sure of one thing:

The Matron of Ravens was going to thoroughly rip him a new one.

Yup. Withers/Jergal was pulling in a hireling for Tav and Co before the assault on Moonrise, but had a cosmic filing error and dropped the whole of Vox Machina in the camp instead. He will not explain, and he will not admit it was a mistake. Now everyone has to roll with these absolute menaces being along for the ride. Vox Machina is here, and it's everyone's problem.

I truly don't know where I'll be taking this, but I haven't had such an intense burst of inspiration like this in a very, very long time, so I couldn't just let it go. At the very least, it was a good experience for me, and I hope it was for some of you as well.

Anyway, that's all for now. Until next time, however, I wish all who read this the best. May your days have nice things because we all deserve more nice things.

Peace!