The next few days pass uneventfully, the hours eaten up by the ranch work. There's plenty to be done in the spring season, what with most of the heifers calving, fences that need fixing up after the winter storms, and the usual work with the stages coming through. Jess throws himself into it, volunteering for any job that needs doing, thinking the busier he is the less time he has to think about what happened at the saloon the other night. Any free time he has he devotes to the mustang, working him in the evenings when ranch chores are done. Still, even as tuckered out as he sleep doesn't come easy. He keeps seeing those empty blue eyes every time he tries to rest, the slack fear on the face of the poor kid. He remembers the look on the faces of those townspeople as well, they'd looked afraid too. Afraid of him. And maybe that's half of whats keeping him up at night, the way Mrs. Gilroy had started when he'd walked into her boarding house like he was going to pull out his gun and start shooting.
It had taken time for the people of Laramie to settle too him, and now it seemed like all that could be out the window. Slim wants to keep on keeping on like nothing's different but Jess knows better. He's seen the winds of good opinion change on him before; it starts out small, wary glances in the street, whispers that go quiet when he turns the corner, and as usual as not ends up with him getting run on out of town. He doesn't know if he could bear that happening again here, not when he finally feels he's settled somewhere proper, not when it would mean leaving the ranch - and the people on it - behind.
It's for that reason, when Slim proposes on Saturday morning that they head in to Laramie together over breakfast, Jess tries his best to turn him down.
"Come on now Jess, you deserve a break. You've been working hard all week, why don't you come on in with me while I pick up the grain order, some things we need for around the house. I'll even buy you a drink before we head back." Slim cajoles, eyeing Jess curiously. Jess is a hard worker, but he's also never one to turn down a break either. Jess tries to smile, shaking his head.
"Aw thanks Slim, but I was thinking I'd take that stallion out and work on him for a bit today. Making some good progress you know. I tell ya, he's gonna be a beaut to ride when he's broken in."
"Jess you've been working on that stallion near every day this week, and I'm telling you he's gonna break your back before you break him. A little time away isn't going to hurt either of you. Now, don't make me beg you."
"I don't think it's a good idea for me to show my face around town for a bit. Folks might not being feeling too friendly like towards me right now. Probably best I just stay back." Jess says, trying to sound light-hearted. Slim's expressions furrows with confusion.
"You talking about what happened last week? Jess, the sheriff ruled it was self-defense, and everyone who was there saw for themselves how hard you tried to talk him down. It's not the first time you've had to shoot a man to defend yourself, and others. What about that fella Roney? You shot him right in the middle of the saloon, and saved Essie Bright's life. This isn't any different." There's an earnestness to Slim's voice, and Jess knows he truly believes what he's saying. In his eyes Jess had done his best in a bad situation, and that was that. But not everyone has a good a heart as Slim in their chest, or as much forgiving that they'll do. He looks down, shifting the food on his plate around uncomfortably with a fork. He's glad Andy's already out in the yard doing his morning chores so he doesn't have to say this in front of him, but he wishes he didn't have to do it front of Jonsey. Trying to pick his words carefully he starts.
"But it ain't the same to them Slim, not at all. Everyone saw that Roney was mad, and they were all half-scared of him and grateful I stepped in to put him down. Not this time, this was some young buck gunslinger who saw me and picked a fight, talked a whole lot about what kind of man I am before he went. I shot down a man in the middle of the street. They might've been scared of him but they were sure as hell scared o' me too, and probably worried that it's gonna happen again." Slim frowns, taking a pause, and Jess hopes that he's understood what Jess is trying to say.
"Look Jess, I know you've had it rough before, and people haven't always treated you kind, but folks here in Laramie they know you, know you're a good man. I just can't believe they'll turn away from you over something like this. Go into town with me, show 'em you're not in the wrong over all this, and if anyone does say anything I'll set them straight. Tell him Jonsey, it'll be fine." Jonsey looks up from his plate, glancing between Jess and Slim. The old man had taken a while longer then Slim to warm all the way up to Jess, probably because his long life has given him a good healthy dose of cynicism to go with, though Jess like's to think now that they're friends.
"Well, I figure you've earned yourself a pretty good reputation 'round here Jess. And with Slim on your side, that's a lot going for you. Anyways, can't hide out here forever, might as well go now and get it over with." Slim looks to Jess expectantly and he sighs. Jonsey's got a point, and while he doesn't think this is liable to go well he can't bring himself to disappoint Slim.
"Alright then, you've convinced me. I'll go." The last part he keeps to his head, and let's hope we don't regret it.
It's a fine spring day as they roll on into Laramie, the early morning chill burned away by the sun, and blue skies stretching out as far as Slim can see. Jess on the other hand is a different matter. Slim can feel the tension rolling off of him from where he's sitting beside him on the bench, his arms folded tight across his chest and his face blank. Slim had tried to warm him up on the journey in, but Jess hadn't been in the mood for talking. After the 4th or 5th mono-syllabic reply Slim had given up, and the rest of the trip had been blanketed in an uncomfortable silence. Slim's glad when they finally reach Laramie, guiding the team down main street and reining them to a stop in front of the general store. Slim hops easily out of the buckboard, lashing the reigns to the hitching post with a practiced hand. Jess follows a moment later, albeit slower. Slim wishes he didn't so much have the same expression as a man about to face a firing squad. Jess takes off his hat, running a hand through his hair and looking away. Slim frowns.
"You coming?" Jess clears his throat, settling his hat back on, his fingers worrying anxiously at his belt like they always do when he's feeling anxious.
"I think I'll just wait out here, if that's alright with you." He mutters. Slim sighs, but doesn't press the other man. He knows he's lucky he even managed to get Jess to follow along to town the way he's feeling.
Judd greets him cheerfully enough when he steps into the store, and they chat for a few minutes about the good weather and local gossip. Judd carefully avoids mentioning what happened last week, and Slim's grateful to the old man for it. He picks up the supplies Jonsey had requested for the kitchen, beans, coffee, salted pork, but it turns out that the delivery from Cheyenne's been delayed and his grain order isn't in yet. Judd tells him that'll likely come the next morning, so Slim can come by and pick it up in the afternoon. Tipping his hat Slim bids him goodbye, stepping back outside. Jess is right where he left him, leaned up against a porchpost, shoulders hunched like he's waiting for a blow that hasn't landed yet. It twists at Slim to see his friend so torn up like this, the easy confidence he usually carries on him like a second skin stripped away. It isn't fair that life has done him such a bad hand to make him act like that.
"Come on, just have to drop that turnbuckle off with the blacksmith, then I'll buy you that drink I promised." Jess just nods, eyes sweeping across the dusty street like he's expecting something to jump out at him from it.
They step out onto the road, heading down towards the blacksmith. There's a few folk out and about, and they don't try to hide their hushed whispers as Slim and Jess pass by, the way their gaze trails the two men. Jess for his part keeps his head down, eyes securely on the ground, and doesn't make any indication he's heard.
The blacksmith, Albert, is out front when they arrive, hammering away at a the steel rim of a wagon wheel. He puts the work aside when he sees them, wiping at his forehead with the back of his hand. He waves in greeting, but Slim doesn't miss the way his eyes flash to the gun at Jess's side. Feeling suddenly protective Slim steps forward, a little in front of Jess.
"Afternoon Albert, got a turnbuckle for you to fix up."
"Sure Slim, just drop it off, I'll have it ready for you in a jiffy."
"Thanks, we were going to have a drink before we head back to the ranch. I'll swing by and pick it up afterwards if that's alright?" Albert nods, and they say their goodbyes, turning back out to the street.
"You don't gotta buy me a drink Slim, we can wait at the wagon for Albert to finish with the turnbuckle." Jess says as they leave, an almost plaintive note to his voice. Slim shakes his head firmly.
"Now Jess, I promised you and I don't break my promises. Come on, I could use a cold beer myself." Once again Jess looks fit to protest but Slim doesn't give him the chance, putting an arm around his shoulder and half-pulling him to the saloon. As they approach the bar Jess's eyes sweep the ground in front of the porch for a moment, like he's searching for something. Slim wonders for a moment if he's looking for a puddle of blood.
"Hey, if this weather stays good might be nice to do some fishing in the crick after dinner tonight. What do you say?" Slim asks brightly, squeezing Jess's shoulder lightly in an attempt to draw his thoughts away from whatever dark place they might be lingering. "Yeah, sure." Jess replies, but it's distracted and Slim half wonders if he knows what he agreed too. Slim walks into the saloon first, pushing open the gull wings for Jess. It's still early afternoon and the bar's only about half-full, but it goes dead silent as soon as the two of them step inside. Slim glances at Jess, who looks a lot like he'd rather be anywhere else but here. He's starting to wonder if maybe he's made a mistake, dragging Jess into town like this. He'd thought it would do the man good to get out and about, show him that things weren't going to be any different. Now it just feels like raking him over the coals.
"Well now, I've seen livelier bunches at a funeral." Slim says loudly, looking one by one to the men sitting around the tables. They're men he knows, decent men who work hard for a living, who've helped him out of tight spots before, who he's helped in return. Frustration rises in him to see the way they're behaving. "Don't let us get in the way of your afternoon." There's a hint of a threat in his words, and as one the room gets back to it's chatter. They walk up to the bar, Slim leaning into it with hip as the bartender approaches.
"I'll take a beer, and a whiskey for Jess." He orders. The bartender, a man named Phil who's been working in the saloon since Slim's father was still alive, hesistates for a moment and then shakes his head.
"Sorry Slim, don't think that's a good idea. I'd be happy to serve you, but think it'd be best if your friend left." For a moment all Slim can do is blink, but the shock quickly fades as hot anger surges to take it's place.
"Phil, I hope I didn't just hear you say what I think you did." He starts, trying to keep his voice even, and only half-succeeding. Phil opens his mouth but Slim barrels ahead, not letting him interrupt, too fired up over the wrongness of it all. "Now Jess here has as much right as any other man to have a drink in this bar, and you know that!" To his credit Phil looks sheepish, but stands his ground, shoulders squaring.
"Slim, you know I respect you and what you're doing out there with the ranch, you and your pop always been good honest men. I just don't want no more trouble here, and that friend of yours, well, he seems to bring it with him. If you don't remember he shot a man dead in this here saloon only last week."
"The sheriff cleared him, it was self-defense. What would you have done if some man came at you like that? Jess didn't have a choice in the matter and I think you know that-" Before he can go any further though there's a hand on his shoulder, Jess pulling him back half-heartedly.
"Slim, it's alright. Just let it go." He mutters. Now Slim's seen Jess spitting mad plenty of times, the man's got the temper of a wildcat and a stubborn streak to match, but right now he doesn't look mad, just defeated. It sits wrong, and though usually Slim has to be the one reining back his partner's fiery disposition right now he thinks he'd prefer to see Jess fired up and angry then beaten down like this.
"Jess, this is wrong." Slim exclaims, determined to be angry enough for the both of them if Jess won't. "You and I both know it, there's no right reason not to serve you other then prejudice. "
"Maybe so, but it's not worth fighting over. I told you I didn't need a drink, now let's just get out of here." Jess is pleading now, and the fight drains out of Slim at the sight. Still he shakes his head at Phil, turning to address the whole room.
"Well, we'll leave then. But I expected better from you Phil, better from all of you. The way you're behaving is downright shameful." With that last admonishment Slim follows Jess back out into the sunlight.