Ron the True Fan:
Grandtree Arena, Crimson Firelands, Hisui Region - roughly 1205 Hours local time - Day 34 of the Hisuian Exile
Ash almost felt sorry for Goomy. Not so for the younger Clay clone Lian.
Arrogant prat reminded him of Gary, BEFORE Ash beat the arrogance out of him in Johto and treated him as such.
Ash learned humility was the best way. Pride was only good in moderation.
"I… How…" Lian said before Ash sighed.
"Are you DONE?" the displaced trainer demanded. "Because I spent over a week getting here to do your job for you and if you keep getting in the way, I'm not responsible for my foot going up your rear end."
"He's right, you know." Hikari said from a fair distance. "He does NOT sleep well and he's… cranky."
Lian wisely stepped aside before Ash walked past, Lian rushing to Goomy's side to check on him.
Good. Anyone that checked on their Pokemon after a battle like that was a good person. They just needed their arrogance curbed.
Ash himself learned that when Brock kicked his ass.
"Praise Sinnoh-" Lian said before Ash scoffed.
"The name of the god your clan worships is Palkia." he said, more than a LITTLE mad. "GET IT RIGHT."
Lian glared at him before realizing that arguing the matter with this angry man was pointless. It might also get him killed if he was pushed too far.
Ash entered the clearing, Pikachu keeping a look out before the massive noble dropped in, looking like a Scyther covered in rock and with… axes for blades.
To cleave.
"VERY original." Ash drolled before Pikachu jumped down, tail turning to steel.
Breaking the fourth wall for a bit, we all know Pikachu is going to win this. Ash and his crew are basically on New Game Plus. So we're not going to focus on the battle.
Just the aftermath.
Which had Klevor on the ground, in a GREAT deal of pain, but no longer insane.
"Kle…" 'The Chosen…' he muttered.
"Keep that to yourself." Ash requested. "Feeling better?"
Klevor shakily got to his feet. "Klevor." 'My thanks, Chosen of Arceus.' said the bug-type. "Kle." 'As you are who you are, you must take this.'
Kleavor slammed his right ax into the tree, a small plate dropping from the branches.
"One of Arceus' plates." Ash said with a small amount of annoyance and to Kleavor's confusion. Noticing this, Ash quickly answered the unspoken question. "Arceus has been trying to get me killed for literally years doing what he should be doing. I have every right to say bad things. Keep the plate."
"Klevor." 'I cannot. It is safer in your hands in these times than in ours.' the bug insisted.
…the worst part was, Ash had no retort to that.
"I hate it when people make sense." he groused. While he was known to be unreasonable in regards to some things, he wasn't so blind to think he knew better then everyone. He DID listen to the experts, even if he did question them.
Jubelife Village - Day 38 - 1254 hours local time
Ash decided riding Tauros back was a better idea than walking. Faster, too. Tauros enjoyed it.
He still felt guilty for not pulling them out for battle as much as they liked, but they were all so… niche and situational. Sure, they helped a lot against Anabel and Drake, but they were otherwise so… situational.
Hikari and Ash dismounted the bull before they entered the village. "Thanks for the ride, Tauros," he said before returning him to his ball.
"I didn't want to ask…" Hikari started.
"The plate is one of Arceus'." Ash answered, pulling out said item. "One of 18. The Bug Plate, I think. Arceus holds one, they change the type to match."
Hikari looked at the plate with wonder. "Touched by a god…" she said reverently, Ash snorting.
"Hikari, Arceus has done NOTHING but try to kill me by sending me on suicide missions." he said dismissively. "I have bled and even DIED doing work for him. And what do I get? Revived and sent back on my way to MORE suicide missions that I only survive because of my Pokemon and Giratina kicking my ass back into my body and back to life for more."
"Pikapi." 'Ash, bitter or not, I think that's enough.' Pikachu warned, Ash scoffing.
"Oh, please, Pikachu. What's Arceus going to do, erase me from existence?" his trainer asked. "You were THERE every time. There is literally nothing the god llama can do to make my life even worse. Other then end it, in which case-"
"Satoshi-kun!" called Volo, interrupting Ash's statement and almost request. "You've returned from your mission! How was Kleavor?"
"Boringly named." Ash deadpanned. "I'm almost thinking Arceus was running out of ideas naming that one."
"Arceus?" Volo asked. "Don't you mean-" he stopped when Ash glared at him. "I see. That's the true name of the Creator."
"Yes. It is." Ash said simply, waving the plate around.
"What is that?" Volo asked. "It looks important."
"It's the Bug Plate." Ash said simply. "One of Arceus' 18 little type-changers. Holds this, changes type to bug. One for every type."
Volo stared at Ash. "…You know much of Almighty Sin-er, Arceus." he added. "Perhaps you can tell me more? And I heard your outburst: perhaps you can vent to me about it. Even if it's angry, I can learn about the Creator."
Ash rose an eyebrow. "Half the things I'd say would be useless for anything remotely close to scholarly work." he said simply. "But thanks for the offer. Now, if you don't mind… I need to tell Kamado it's done and take a nap…"
"But it's only noon." Volo said in confusion.
Hikari came to the rescue. "He didn't sleep very much on the way over or the way back." she said apologetically. "And you know how he has nightmares-"
"Say no more." Volo cut off. "Have a good rest, Satoshi-kun." with that, the merchant left.
"Why does he seem so goddamn familiar?" Ash asked before walking, barely, to the headquarters building.
Four days later - 0759 hours
Ash stumbled out of the simple abode he and Hikari claimed for themselves before finding someone all too familiar.
"It's not Mars, it is NOT Mars…" he snapped as he looked at her. Same hair, same general facial features.
Her ancestor. The temptation to kill her was…strong.
But she wasn't Mars.
"Ah! You must be Satoshi-kun!" she greeted. "I'm Arezu of the Diamond Clan. I was told if we had any problems, we go to you for solutions!"
"My reputation precedes me." Ash said dryly. "Tell me you're not here for some theological crap."
Arezu waved it off. "Oh no, no no, Adaman was QUITE clear that you have a dim view of the gods, especially Almighty…" she paused, putting a finger to her lip. "What did you call him? 'Sinnoh's not the real name according to-"
"Arceus." Ash answered. "And of course I have a damn dim view of some god who could snap his fingers to solve every problem in seconds, but tosses someone like me at the problem instead."
She raised her hands. "Not my intention, my lord!" she protested. "But perhaps we should go to the headquarters. You know, to tell your boss?"
"Unnecessary." came the somewhat unwelcome voice of Cyllene, whose expression had only slightly softened as she approached them, laying her eyes on Ash.
He would later claim the King gave him the idea of mocking Cyrus with the fact his grandma was trying to get into his pants. Ash knew all too well that an angry enemy made mistakes, from both using it and BEING used by it and Cyrus was only human.
But right now, she was an uncomfortable reminder.
"Captain." he said simply.
"You only need to report to the Commander on completion of assignments." she continued. "As you are more than capable of dealing with whatever the Diamond and Pearl Clans need, he has put you at their disposal. And by extension, Hikari."
Well, he couldn't argue with being busy.
"I'll take you to the Crimson Mirelands. It's a five day journey on foot and we don't have much choice but to go on foot." Arezu cut in. "Someone needs… help. A LOT of help…"
"I'm pretty sure I can handle it." Ash said dryly. Not much he couldn't handle. "But you're sure we can't ride a Tauros there?"
"Too many poison-types." Arezu said before pausing. "…what's a Tauros?"
He hated time travel.
Crimson Mirelands - 3 days later
Hikari was beginning to hate Arezu.
Redheaded bitch was trying hard to seduce Satoshi. Now, thankfully, Satoshi had standards - no sex below the age of 18 for reasons he didn't feel he needed to explain, for example - but that didn't make it any easier.
Fortunately, it seemed he had no interest in anything other than getting the job done as soon as possible.
That said… on the way there, he had one of his nightmares. Hikari was busy looking for berries and such to bulk up their supplies when he just slumped down. She didn't learn about that until after she got back to camp.
And found Arezu with his head over her chest.
This would not stand. Yes, Satoshi's dreams needed to be calmed, but it had to be her to calm them! Akari had already begun working on a dowry, seeing as…
Well, Hikari's feelings for the stranger were obvious.
It was clear that Arezu thought she would be the better bride - as a member of the Diamond Clan, she was actually a noble, minor or not - but Hikari had to step it up.
"So, Satoshi-kun~" purred the bitch as they skirted past a pond. "What's it like where you're from?"
"Hell." Satoshi said dryly. "I'm from Ransei."
"Surely Ransei isn't in the middle of another civil war." Arezu exclaimed before Hikari scowled.
"I'd still be there, doing thankless work for that oversized llama, if it wasn't." Satoshi retorted in a deadpan.
Now, Hikari had been wondering about that. She didn't want to pry, but… Arezu did. "Thankless work?" asked the redhead. "How did you become this warrior for the Creator? Intense training? Chosen by a priestess? Perhaps-"
"I was born." Satoshi cut off, angrily, enough that Pikachu was worried on his shoulder. "THAT'S how it happened. Shit kept happening and I was the only one that could deal with it. And what do I get? MORE work. More stress."
"You gained something out of it." Arezu said, eyes sparkling with wonder. Hikari wanted to gag. "You learned the true names of the gods."
"At the cost of my childhood, my family and my SANITY," Satoshi snapped, making the redhead recoil and Hikari wince. "I'm not entirely sure if I'm all there-" he gestured to his head with his left hand, "after all I've gone through. So please DROP it."
It would take a specially hardened woman to handle Satoshi's ill humors. And Arezu wasn't it.
"…Well…if you want to talk, I can-" Arezu started before Hikari walked past her to glare at her.
"Satoshi-kun doesn't want to talk about it, so stop asking." she snapped at the redhead. "I might wonder, but it pains him in his dreams, so I don't want him to think about it."
Manstealing, man-hurting bitch.
Arezu left for somewhere else the next day, as the Solacecon Temple was Pearl Clan territory.
Ash was not blind to Arezu's attempts to seduce him - PLAYING dumb did not equal BEING dumb - but he was not interested in screwing with history. Last thing he needed was Mars being his granddaughter or something.
Don't get him wrong. He WAS tempted. But when the thought crossed his mind, the thought of Serena stopped him.
Call him whipped if you want. He loved her too much to betray her.
Or any of his girls. …who he suspected Hikari was. She had too many mannerisms from his Sinnohan angel in a more rustic form.
Would he be like a dragon kidnapping a princess if she was? Stealing her from her time just because he wanted her?
Still, he'd had to deal with it later as he walked into the temple, finding an old woman with a Bidoof looking for something.
"Go away, boy." said the old woman, not even looking at the two. "I have no interest in entertaining your youthful prattle."
"And I have no interest in dealing with an old hag who should be in her family home surrounded by family instead of… whatever it is you're doing here." Ash retorted, gaining her attention. "You're supposed to be a warden. Where's your ward? Shouldn't you be taking care of him?"
He had no time for her old lady crap.
She glared at him, age vs annoyance and anger.
Age was no match as she silently conceded defeat. "I am also the caretaker of these ruins." she said. "And I have much to do. Even though I see you keep your Pikachu out, the rest of your pokemon are trapped in those balls-"
"They can come out at any time they want." Ash cut off with a scowl.
The old hag huffed. "You are the one who defeated Klevor. All you did was beat him into submission like a bully-"
"Were you THERE?" Ash demanded in turn. "If you weren't, you have no right, none at all, to judge me for helping him burn off the energy Arceus forced into him, the same energy YOUR Noble is suffering from, so stop being an obstinate old bitch and LET ME HELP YOU."
The old woman turned to glare at him, but once again, Ash's will - and righteous fury - overwhelmed the old woman.
"…Very well." she admitted. "But before you face Ursaluna, I will ask for your help in finding that." she gestured to the mural, missing a massive section. "Thieves stole a part of this temple. Such sacrilege is an insult to Almighty Sin-"
"Arceus. Does not. CARE." Ash cut off, THOROUGHLY done with the 'almighty Sinnoh' bullshit. "And YES, I know the true names of your gods. YOU worship Palkia. The Diamond Clan's 'patron' is Dialga. The God of the Dead is Giratina. THEIR master, the Creator, is called ARCEUS."
"…They happen to be YOUR gods, too, boy." she retorted.
Ash scoffed. "I have done thankless work for them, even dying multiple times, since I became a Pokemon trainer," he said, to her shock. "I'm their gofer and problem solver. I'll curse them if I want. What'll they do? Erase me from existence? I'm too USEFUL for that."
"I will… consider that. For now, though, I must rest," said the old woman, slowly marching off.
Hikari, who remained silent - what could she add? - finally spoke up. "No respect for elders?" she asked quietly.
"No respect for elders who are too prideful to ask for help when they know they need it." Ash corrected. "I have PLENTY of respect for elders who help and ask for help when they have to."
"Satoshi-kun!" came a call from the entrance as Volo came barreling in. "I heard the anger from the entrance! No love lost with the gods, I see!"
"Volo, you have NO idea." Ash replied dryly.
"Still, let me see what a 'gofer' for the gods can do. Will you honor me with a battle?" Volo asked, smiling in a damn familiar way.
Pikachu looked at Ash, smirking. He wanted a good fight.
"Pikachu wants it, so send out your first Pokemon." he ordered.
"Come out, my little friend!" Volo called, opening a Pokeball and releasing…
A Gible.
…Oh that explained EVERYTHING.
The bang over the eye, the facial features, the obsession with ruins…now a member of the Land Shark Pokemon line.
Volo was CYNTHIA'S ancestor.
The shark danced his land shark dance. …this was going to be torture. He didn't want to hurt the little guy. He didn't even look like he wanted to fight.
Just… chomp.
CHOMP!
Case in point as he latched onto Ash's head and eyesmiled.
"…this is going to be a problem." Volo said as Ash pet the land shark.
Ash wasn't complaining.
Four hours later - Crimson Mirelands
Volo came primarily to guide Ash to where he saw a group of bandits haul something away.
When Ash came to the camp… WELL…
He wasn't impressed with them. One was a dead ringer for Candice, one clearly looked like Saturn - and Ash was SORELY tempted to put a round through her head JUST to keep HIM from existing - and the oldest?
A younger version of Agatha.
Clover, Coin and Charm, in that order. An all female and all human and thoroughly unlikeable version of the TRio.
Ash's response? Send out Goodra and have him Dragonpulse their Pokemon into the ground. Again, New Game Plus. You KNOW how this ends.
"Girls, we should get out of here!" Charm shouted before rain began to fall.
Ash nodded at Goodra's forethought. "Where's the tablet?" he asked. "You have two choices. Tell me willingly or I have Natu pluck it from your heads. And for being selfish, egotistical, self-centered bitches, I'm preferring the latter. But I'll let you choose whichever's easier for you."
He had exhausted his patience LONG ago.
"We'll never talk! Girls-"
"Pikachu." Ash cut off. "Thunder."
Pikachu obeyed, dropping a thunderbolt from the heavens on them. They were even LESS endearing then the TRio. They were quirky but goodhearted. These three were selfish and unwilling to even try to do better.
So he didn't even think twice before dropping the hammer.
"Consider that your only warning." Ash spat before Natu nested on Charm's head. Then she teleported away and returned with the mural in her talons, like a smug parrot. "Being selfish won't get you anywhere. You three will turn on each other sooner or later."
Hopefully they realized this soon and turned over a new leaf. …Unlikely, though.
Hikari knew Satoshi was good, but taking down three bandits in minutes? That was scary.
"Your tablet," he said to Calaba, before Bidoof lifted the mural and put it back in place.
The old woman nodded. "'All lives touch other lives to create something new and alive'..." she read.
Satoshi scowled. "I HATE Unown." he grumbled, getting their attention.
"What's… Unown?" Hikari asked, confused before…
"Un-own…" sang something that looked like a letter in the mural as it flashed in out of nowhere. Pikachu electrocuted it. "UNOWN!"
Her partner scowled. "THAT'S an Unown. Fucking letter Pokemon and servants of Giratina!" Satoshi snapped. "GO BACK TO THE DISTORTION REALM AND STAY THERE OR THE NEXT TIME I VISIT, YOUR BOSS GETS MY FOOT UP HIS SNAKE ASS!"
"UNOWN!" cried the Pokemon before disappearing.
"You have no respect for the servants of the gods-" Calaba started before Satoshi's fury turned to her. "…They have done you ill."
"You. Have. NO. IDEA." he ground out. "They alter reality in massive numbers. I had to undo their crap TWICE, which is two times more than absolutely necessary!"
Hikari's thoughts ran wild. "…did they…" she paused. "Never mind."
"…You were correct, young one. I need your help." Calaba said. "Calm Ursaluna's rage. I cannot fight, I never have. Do what you must, but do not harm him."
Satoshi nodded grimly. "I'll do what I can, but I make no promises on leaving him unharmed." he said. "I WILL have to fight him."
Which we all know how is going to end. New. Game. Plus.
Half a league from Jubilife Village - one and one half weeks later
He was STILL glaring at the plates. One from Liligant and one from Ursaluna.
Hikari knew Satoshi hated Arceus, but seriously.
Leventon was pleased with progress on the Pokedex - Satoshi caught everything there was to catch in the Mirelands - but she didn't care about that.
"Yen for your thoughts?" she asked.
"I think Arceus is trying to find my breaking point." Satoshi said. "These are its' plates."
"SATOSHI-KUN!" cried a voice Hikari never wanted to hear again.
Redheaded BITCH!
"I need to talk to you!" said the redhead. "Satoshi!"
"I heard you the first time!" Satoshi yelled before dismounting the bull Pokemon. "Tauros, make sure she gets back to the village."
"Satoshi-kun, wai-" Hikiar never finished as Tauros bolted forward.
Alone at last.
Adaman agreed with Arezu: with the Warrior of Arceus, he-who-knew, the Diamond Clan's prospects would SOAR.
…Also, she liked him. For all his anger, he was honest, wasting no time in helping people and was eager to do so. He just…didn't like doing anything for the gods.
Doing it all your life for no thanks might do that.
Still, dropping everything to help someone? Father material.
Adaman had said whatever Satoshi wanted would be the dowry. No expense spared.
"I wanted to thank you for helping me with Liligant." she started. "And… well…"
Satoshi sighed. "What is it, Arezu?" he asked, tired, impatient and mentally drained.
"My clan has an offer for you. A place to call home and…" she blushed. "Me. As your bride."
Satoshi just stared.
"Adaman can set up the terms, but whatever your price is-"
"Arezu, I can't accept." Satoshi cut off. "For more reasons than you know. Reasons I can't tell you."
"Why not?!" she demanded. "Am I not-" He fixed her with a glare that said 'shut up, I'm going to explain and DON'T interrupt me'.
Pikachu said some things in his language that Satoshi understood.
"I KNOW, Pikachu. But I think it's the only solution." he said to his starter before fixing his attention on Arezu. "I need your word that everything you are about to hear will die with you. You will tell no one."
Arezu nodded slowly. "You have it." she said, before pulling out a small woodworking knife and pricking her finger, wincing as blood leaked out.
A blood oath was binding. If she spoke of it to anyone, she would forfeit her life.
He understood. "Good." he said. "My name isn't Satoshi. It's Ash Ketchum. I'm from Pallet Town in Kanto and I'm from the future."
She started to laugh before she realized he was not lying. "…How can you be… Did Lord Dialga-"
"Celebi. Guardian of the Forest and Preserver of the Timeline, sent me here by accident to escape an attack by someone trying to capture her." Satoshi… Ash… explained. "I shouldn't even BE here. My presence might screw up the future."
"But… why would you… you know… reject me?" she asked sadly. "I can't be that unappealing to you…"
"I know your descendant." he said. "Her name is Mars. And-"
"Oh." she cut off, needing no further explanation. He was… INVOLVED with her? THAT would make things awkward… "I'm… sorry. What do I tell Adaman?"
"That I can't be bought?" he suggested sarcastically. "I don't care what you tell him, Arezu. I just know this. I don't belong here. And frankly, you deserve better than a broken boy who grew old. Just don't tell ANYONE. My secret dies with YOU. Understand?"
She nodded. "Very well." she answered numbly. "…I'm-"
"Don't be sorry. You didn't know." Ash interrupted gently before walking away, heading for the village.
Diary of Arezu
This isn't for me. But… for her. In the future, you will be… his love.
I met him. Ash Ketchum of Pallet Town. He hurts. Suffers. The gods push him forward, taking parts of him a piece at a time.
But he will rush to aid any in need. His rage is borne not of true anger, but nights without sleep, terrors that keep him awake at night.
He will need you. He loves you, after all. Or he will. I don't know when he met you in the future.
Be there for him. Maybe you will. Maybe you'll be his childhood sweetheart. I hope so.
But know he is kind in his own way. Just. Any shortcomings are because he was torn apart by the deeds he was made to perform. Oh! You need to know what he looks like. I'll make a sketch of him.
(Sketch of Ash Ketchum in charcoal)
I've already broken my promise to tell no one. But you'll know everything. You deserve it.
Be the woman he needs. You've gotten all the warning I can give.
Mars… be good to him.
Ron the True Fan: Hehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe.
Takeshi Yamato: …You're not… yes, yes you are. Well, you did say I opened the floodgate. This… this is going to be NUTS.
Ron the True Fan: Blame Jorn. And YES, I'm skipping over anything unnecessary. You know he's going to win every Noble fight. It's… like Kratos in God of War III, with maxed out EVERYTHING at the beginning of the game. EVERYTHING is no match for you. Or Issac in Dead Space Remake. …Fear the hand cannon. (pulls out FOAM FINGER and slips it over right hand)
Takeshi Yamato: (Winces) Right. Anyway, my other thought regarding Arezu and Mars is… well… honestly I have a thing for Redheads, myself, but I'll never poach someone else's girl. Cosmic Era Gundam, Lunamaria is my main waifu - Flay Allster has a more 'pure' shade of red, but I am firmly a Kira/Flay shipper so I'm not breaking that up. Code Geass, Lulu/Kallen OTP and you are not changing my mind. Etc, etc, etc. If nothing else, this adds a redhead to the harem.
Ron the True Fan: I HAVE been accused of going crazy with it, but we all know who to blame for this. (Take: HEY!) At least I'm being RESTRAINED with it. I'm trying not to go insane with number count. …Unless it is more chapters and subs.
Takeshi Yamato: Obligatory YouTube plug and Tethys Shipyard plug here. Seriously, go watch that stuff. And watch Ron's Starfleet Command 2 vids while you're at it.
Ron the True Fan: I'm the only one DOING it. Show some love for the game that kept Trek alive during the 70s! (Star Fleet Battles = SFC)
Ja Ne!