Chapter 24: The Confrontation

Frollo was irked when Esmeralda ran up the stairs. It became clear that she was up to something, which couldn't be good. Frollo would have followed her, but the archdeacon insisted on speaking to him.

"I only need your attention for a few minutes." The holy man promised.

"What on earth is this about?!" Frollo demanded.

The archdeacon beckoned the judge away from the stairs. Frollo reluctantly followed him on a sudden walk around the building.

"You seem to have recovered well." The archdeacon commented.

Frollo hesitated to acknowledge the fact that he'd been injured, hoping that the circumstances weren't too well known.

"There is no need to avoid the topic." The archdeacon assured. "I only wanted to say that your actions were quite heroic."

"What is it to you?" Frollo scoffed.

The archdeacon stopped in front of the pews.

"Frollo," He said in a near pleading manner. "The maiden you saved was my niece, Elaine."

This was worse than Frollo could have imagined. With the archdeacon being so close to that girl he had saved, there was no doubt he knew all the details of the night!

"I'm very grateful for what you did." The holy man continued.

Frollo sighed.

"I suppose she has told you all about the incident." He assumed.

"She does talk of it frequently." The archdeacon admitted. "Mostly asking if I've heard any news of your condition. She was quite worried after your fall, you see. And she wants to thank you."

It occurred to Frollo that he wasn't often thanked for anything, unless the gesture was obligatory. It was strange to think that someone desperately wanted to show gratitude to him. But that surely wasn't all that the girl was saying...

"What else?" Frollo asked suspiciously.

"She was quite upset by the whole incident." The archdeacon replied. "Elaine was kidnapped just before you came and found her. The thieves were planning to hold her for ransom to solicit money from the church. It was quite scary for the poor girl. She's had many nightmares since then..."

Frollo grew suspicious at the mention of nightmares. If Esmeralda had said something to the archdeacon about his nightmares, he would not forgive her. This couldn't come up. He would have to try to avoid the topic.

"That's unfortunate." He brushed off.

He remembered what he'd been trying to find out: Whether the archdeacon knew of his shameful mark.

"What else did she say?" Frollo interrogated.

"You seem angry." The archdeacon noticed.

"I want to know what else Elaine told you."

"What are you expecting me to say?"

Frollo grew frustrated with this avoidance. He snapped.

"That you've heard all about my gruesome, disgusting SCAR! She told you all about it! Didn't she?!"

The archdeacon paused. He looked at the judge with sympathy.

"I did hear about it." He admitted. "But not from Elaine. It came up when I was running an errand. The talk on the street was... Rather loud."

"And your niece had nothing to say about it?" The judge asked accusatively.

"She was with me when I heard it." The archdeacon replied. "She did confirm that she had seen what everyone was talking about. But she never described it as gruesome or disgusting."

"Then what was her opinion?" Frollo asked doubtfully.

"She seemed disturbed," The archdeacon said sadly. "To think that her savior had once been so hurt. Especially when you were also hurt saving her."

"Is that all?"

"Yes."

Frollo had a hard time believing it.

"You don't seem convinced." The archdeacon commented.

"I find it hard to believe," Frollo said through gritted teeth. "That someone could see that sight and not be disgusted."

"Why would you think that?" The archdeacon asked. "I don't suppose Esmeralda reacted that way."

Frollo was brought back to the night of his wedding, when he'd reluctantly bared his skin at his bride's request. Esmeralda's reaction to the mark certainly hadn't been one of disgust. She'd touched him with care.

"...No." He admitted.

"Then clearly you can't always expect disgust." The archdeacon remarked. "I do wonder why you'd think that. Is it perhaps because you feel ashamed?"

"I have nothing to be ashamed of!" Frollo retorted defensively.

"Shame doesn't always come from a reasonable source." The archdeacon informed.

"I won't talk about this." Frollo insisted. "Is there something you actually need me for?"

"As a matter of fact, I am concerned for you." The archdeacon shared.

Frollo was now certain that Esmeralda had planned this. He would have to have a word with her about it... But he had to work his way out of this situation first.

"I don't know what my wife has told you," Frollo said frustratedly. "But I promise it is nonsense!"

"Is that really so?" The archdeacon asked. "Did she lie when she said you hadn't eaten in days?"

This was too much. Frollo struggled to contain his anger. He wanted to call Esmeralda a liar, but he realized that answering the question would be useless. The real answer was written all over his face.

"She said you were doing this to punish yourself." The archdeacon went on. "Would you like to tell me more about that?"

"No." Frollo managed.

It wasn't easy to say more than that. Rage was making his voice crack up.

"Frollo, I am a priest." The archdeacon reminded. "If you believe you have something to work out with God, I am the man to help you."

"I already know what the problem is." Frollo said surely. "I don't need a priest to explain it to me."

"Well then, would you prefer to talk to a friend?"

"A friend? You have never been my friend!"

"Not that I haven't tried."

"What are you talking about?!"

To Frollo's surprise, the holy man smiled.

"Do you really not remember, Claude?" He asked. "We were classmates once, at the University of Paris."

Frollo thought back to his days as a student. There had indeed been one classmate who had tried to be his friend. He started to recognize that classmate's face now.

"Jean?..." Frollo asked in disbelief.

"Indeed." The archdeacon replied.

"ARGH!"

Frollo clenched his fists tightly.

Jean... The archdeacon was Jean. This could get no worse! Frollo wished he was talking to anyone else. Anyone but the man who had seen him with his nose bleeding after being hit by his father. Anyone but the man who had helped him bury his father. Anyone but the man who had confronted him for the scheme he'd pulled in order to graduate at the top of the class. Anyone else!

"All this time..." Frollo growled. "And you never saw it fit to tell me who you were?!"

"Why would I?" The archdeacon asked. "I never thought you would care. You were rather indifferent to me when we were in school together."

Frollo couldn't deny that. Despite sharing a class with Jean, he hadn't even known his classmate's name until the week before their graduation from the arts program. And the introduction hadn't resulted in much. They'd never really been friends. Frollo had only asked Jean to assist him in digging the grave out of desperation.

"I could never forget you." The holy man informed. "There were too many things back then that bothered me."

Frollo hesitated to speak, curious to see where this was going.

"For example," The archdeacon continued. "That time when one of my friends punched you."

"What of it?" Frollo asked unpleasantly.

"It was odd that you collapsed like you did. You've never been fragile, and you weren't punched very hard. But it makes sense now... You've had that scar for quite a while, haven't you?"

Frollo's anger was joined by anxiety. If the archdeacon knew this much, it was clear that none of his secrets were safe.

"What did Esmeralda tell you?!" He demanded.

"Very little, to be honest." The priest said truthfully. "It was only when I asked that she confirmed that your nightmares related to your scar."

Frollo's heart pounded. He felt the last ounces of his secrecy start to vanish.

"She said nothing of where it came from." The holy man continued. "I have an idea, though."

"...What is it?" Frollo asked anxiously.

"I remember that your father was quite... violent with you. Knowing that about him, and knowing how shameful this scar feels to you... Claude?"

The archdeacon saw a variety of restless emotions in Frollo's face. He was obviously upset. And moreover, he was unusually speechless.

"Claude... Sit down."

Frollo sighed as he sat next to his former classmate in the pew. He hated all of this. He felt helpless.

"I know this is painful." The archdeacon said understandingly. "I only want to help you overcome these nightmares. If you will let me..."

Although his natural inclination was to end this conversation, Frollo wondered if he might benefit from whatever help Jean had to offer. He was desperate for these nightmares to end. And it wasn't as if he would have to reveal much humiliating information. The archdeacon seemed to know most of it already.

"...Very well." Frollo gave in.

Jean prepared himself for a struggle. Thankfully, he had a shred of hope. Once, twenty years ago, he had succeeded in making Claude Frollo listen. He prayed that God would allow it to happen again.

"How am I doing with my assumptions?" He asked.

"Rather well, I admit." Frollo replied, humiliated.

"Would you like to tell me exactly what happened?" The archdeacon invited.

Frollo reluctantly explained how he had been burned, telling his former classmate everything he had told Esmeralda. Jean listened carefully to the whole story, feeling more sad for the judge with each word.

"I'm not surprised that you've had so many nightmares." The archdeacon finally commented. "It is a normal thing to suffer after such a horrible experience."

"But they stopped ages ago!" Frollo said with exhaustion. "Only to start again after all these years... God is angry with me. I don't know why, but I am sure of it."

"I think I know why this is happening." The archdeacon said compassionately. "And it has nothing to do with God's anger."

"What else could it be?"

"God is not condemning you, Frollo. You are condemning yourself. Your father burned you over a girl once. Now that another like her has come into your life, you are just as afraid as you were back then. You believed that you deserved to suffer because of that girl all those years ago, and now you feel the same way about Esmeralda. You can't stop dreaming of that awful thing because you are strangled in shame."

"What?"

Frollo was bewildered by this line of thought. What shame could he possibly feel over Esmeralda? He was married to her. Their relationship was perfectly lawful. Shame would be irrational.

"That can't be." He argued. "I see nothing to be ashamed of."

"Finding your feelings irrational doesn't mean they are not real." The archdeacon informed. "That burn put fear in you. Fear like that doesn't vanish just because you judge it as unnecessary. It can trouble one for a lifetime, crippling you when there is a hint of a similar situation."

Perhaps Jean was right. Frollo realized that marriage hadn't really changed his fear of being punished for indulging in his desires. It had only provided him with an excuse to push that fear aside. He'd never really gotten over the feeling that he was doing something wrong. He'd only told himself it was gone. The shame had not left him. It had only hidden.

"You condemn yourself now just as you condemned yourself then." The archdeacon observed. "That is why you suffer, Frollo. You need to get to the root of this. You must believe that what happened to you was not your fault."

"Excuse me?" Frollo questioned. "Why would I ever believe that?! All my parents ever did was teach me to be righteous! My father burned me to prevent me from running away and fornicating with that girl!"

"And why would you have done that?" The archdeacon inquired.

He already knew why, but he needed Frollo to answer that question for his own benefit.

The judge hesitated. Sorrow came over him as he remembered his last moment with her. The girl who had said she loved him...

"Because..." He struggled. "...Because I wanted to be loved."

"Of course you did." The archdeacon remarked. "She offered you something you lacked. Something you wouldn't have lacked if your parents had loved you."

"It wasn't their fault!" Frollo snapped. "They were good people! I know they would have loved me if they were able. But no one can! No one ever has!"

"You are not unlovable, Frollo." The priest insisted. "Your parents failed to love you because they were unloving. And truly, the only reason others don't show more love to you is because you make it so hard for them."

Those words pierced Frollo's mind like a needle. He suddenly saw visions. Visions of Jean, who had tried to be his friend. Visions of Quasimodo, who had always been so good to him only to be treated so coldly. Visions of Esmeralda, who had been there for him all this time and even said she could like him if he were a better man...

"There is just one thing I don't understand." The archdeacon brought up. "I don't see why a man so obsessed with righteousness would do such unrighteous things."

"What are you referring to?" Frollo asked with a glare.

"What am I referring to? There are too many things to name, but why don't we start with what you did before graduation!"

"I rose to the top of the class to honor my father."

"By cheating and sabotaging your classmate!"

"I did what I had to."

"And what about Esmeralda? Were you righteous in hunting her down and forcing her to marry you?!"

"...No."

"Then why would you do it?!"

"Because it wasn't my fault! If she hadn't been so seductive-"

"Enough of this!"

The archdeacon stood up angrily in front of Frollo, looking down at him with a disappointed scowl.

"You see everything the wrong way." He declared. "You blame others for your own actions, and yet you will spend a lifetime blaming yourself for that which is not your fault. I think I finally understand how your mind works, Frollo. Your parents made you terrified of not being perfect. And so, because you are not perfect, you've cheated in order to feel like a righteous man. You make yourself feel adequate by lowering everyone else and blaming your faults on them."

Frollo could only stare. He didn't want to hear any of this. He wanted to see himself as a righteous man, to believe that he was right to feel superior. He wanted to believe that he had done nothing wrong and that he had never cheated at anything. But hearing someone describe the functions of his mind like this made it unavoidable. Suddenly, every lie Frollo had ever told himself was exposed. He was not the perfect man he had trained himself to see. He was only a liar...

"I've told you once," The archdeacon continued. "And I will tell you again. Lying to yourself will not make you guiltless."

The judge was paralyzed. Suddenly he was afraid. His view of himself, that he had held for so many years, was wrong. That realization was brutal.

"Claude," The archdeacon said in a calmer tone. "It was not your fault that your parents abused you. But the abuse you have inflicted on everyone around you is entirely your fault."

The holy man saw that Frollo was overwhelmed, clearly thinking about it all. He decided he had said enough.

"I will leave you to think." He concluded, exiting the pews.

"What must I do?" Frollo suddenly asked.

Jean was taken off guard by the question, but grateful for it.

"Know that your suffering is not your fault." The archdeacon replied. "Repent from your sins. Right your wrongs. And for God's sake, please eat something."

He continued walking away, then suddenly stopped.

"And Claude... Esmeralda has been a far greater wife than you have earned. I pray that you do right by her."

It was true. Frollo knew it.

Esmeralda briefly explained the situation to Quasimodo while they set the table. She didn't go into detail, but shared that she had arranged for the archdeacon to meet Frollo in order to convince him that he wasn't being punished by God.

"If the archdeacon can convince him, he may finally stop starving himself." Esmeralda explained.

"I see why you brought all this food." Quasimodo commented. "It looks delicious."

"Now we just have to wait."

It wasn't long before Esmeralda heard footsteps on the stairs. She ran to the top of the stairs to meet her husband. When she saw him, Esmeralda thought of many questions about what had been said during his conversation with the archdeacon. Frollo looked shocked and overwhelmed. Even more significantly, he was quiet. Esmeralda had expected him to immediately start criticizing her for putting him in this position, but he only stared at her when he saw her.

"Hello." Esmeralda greeted, attempting to break the silence.

"Hello..." Frollo said weakly.

"We have something for you." Esmeralda announced.

She gestured for Frollo to follow her and went to the table, sitting down next to Quasimodo.

Frollo was surprised to see a very attractive meal laid out on the table. There was bread with butter, warm meat, and several clusters of grapes. The food was plentiful and looked excellent, especially to a starving man.

"It's a special lunch." Quasimodo said invitingly. "Esmeralda really went out of her way for all of this!"

Frollo hesitated, but he soon came to join his companions at the table. They all started to eat. Frollo thoroughly enjoyed the meal as it cured his aching hunger.

"What do you think?" Esmeralda asked.

"I have but one complaint." Frollo replied.

Esmeralda and Quasimodo were concerned, but Frollo smiled. It wasn't a smirk or anything malicious, just a regular, peaceful smile. Esmeralda had never seen Frollo smile like that.

"There is no cheese." The judge finished, still smiling.

Esmeralda thought of the incident with the cheese, which had made Frollo so upset. She realized he was making fun of that. He was... joking! It was so unlike him, making a joke that wasn't harsh. And at a moment like this, when he seemed to be so disturbed. His mood had lifted, obviously as a result of this setup. That made Esmeralda smile.

Quasimodo was curious about the meaning of the apparent joke, but he decided to wait to ask about it. This was a peaceful moment. And as long as Esmeralda was smiling, he knew it was a good thing. The bell ringer smiled too.

The plan had worked.