Chapter 29: The Restart

Claude sent the letters. It would take an annoyingly long time to receive responses to them, but it would be worthwhile. He didn't know what to do after that. Everything felt strange.

It was an adjustment, having a change of heart. Claude understood things about himself that he'd never been aware of before. One was that he was lonely. He'd been lonely for a painfully long time. That was a consequence of being a bad man. Bad men didn't earn themselves much company. They were hated and isolated.

Claude had never realized his own loneliness because he'd believed that people were unimportant. He hadn't valued anyone enough to care if they liked him or not, so he'd thought it harmless to be isolated. But the feeling of emptiness had always been there. He simply hadn't figured out that it came from a lack of companionship.

Now it made sense that Claude had never failed to visit Quasimodo. Despite his resentful feelings about raising the boy, Quasimodo had been the one person to look at him with some form of fondness. Claude realized that he'd liked that, even if he'd never admitted it to himself. He'd always focused on his resentment rather than his gratitude toward the slight relief of his loneliness, but that didn't make it any less real.

It hurt Claude to know that Quasimodo wanted nothing to do with him now, but this was what he knew he deserved. He deserved worse, really. Being lonelier than usual was a far lighter sentence than he had earned with his crimes, even with the additional loneliness of Esmeralda's absence.

Claude struggled when he didn't see Esmeralda for the rest of the day. Having her around had become a natural part of life for him. She was a good companion, almost like a friend. Whether she would continue to be Claude's companion was a painful question to ask. Even if she didn't hate him anymore, he certainly didn't expect her to want to continue this cruel joke of a marriage. He wanted to think that there was some way to keep Esmeralda in his life, as a friend. But that was hard to imagine when she was friends with Quasimodo, who hated him.

The loneliness grew worse at night. Claude had gotten used to sleeping next to someone. Now he dreaded the possibility of waking up alone in the case of another nightmare. He lay awake for hours struggling to find the peace to fall asleep. What eventually calmed him was the thought of Esmeralda lying with him, nuzzled up against his body. If he imagined it hard enough, Claude could still feel her warmth.

The sound of the bells was louder than ever. Esmeralda realized it was because they were right above her. She shifted under the blankets on the floor, remembering where she was. It was strange to think that she'd actually slept in the belltower, but that was according to her decision yesterday.

The day before had been intense. On one hand, Esmeralda had been impressed to see her husband have such a dramatic change of heart that he would tell Quasimodo the truth. But on the other hand, she empathized with her dearest friend, who now mourned the loss of his mother and resented his father figure.

Esmeralda was torn. Part of her wanted to make peace with Claude, but another part wanted to comfort Quasimodo. Was it possible to do both? That question troubled her.

Quasimodo came to find her when he finished ringing the morning bells.

"Did you sleep well enough?" He asked.

Esmeralda smiled.

"Not too badly." She replied.

Quasimodo smiled back at her, but his smile soon turned into a frown.

"I... think I'm ready to talk about it." He said uncomfortably.

Esmeralda had been waiting for this. After their initial conversation about Frollo's confession, Quasimodo had been too upset to talk about what he wanted to do next. Esmeralda had accepted that, understanding that some time to relax first would probably benefit the poor boy. After leaving briefly to fetch some blankets (and talk to Claude, although she hadn't mentioned that part to Quasimodo), Esmeralda had spent the rest of the day cheering up her friend. They'd played some card games, cracked jokes, and climbed around the structure of the building making casual conversation. It was a fun day, and that night they had even managed to laugh until they'd fallen asleep. Esmeralda's company had done the job of helping Quasimodo relax, but now it seemed to be time to handle serious matters.

Once again, they came to sit next to one another against the wall.

"I've been thinking about it." Quasimodo shared. "Frollo really is sorry... Isn't he?"

Since calming down, Quasimodo had been able to think about the situation more clearly. He still found it hard not to see Frollo as an evil man, but he simultaneously saw a remorseful man. It was impossible not to see. Frollo, as Quasimodo knew him, was not capable of crying over his wrongdoings or being honest when the truth did not flatter him. Seeing him behave that way was all the proof Quasimodo needed that the man had changed.

"He really is." Esmeralda agreed.

"I feel like I should forgive him." Quasimodo said sadly. "It feels like the right thing to do. But... I just can't. I can't get over what he did..."

He looked at Esmeralda with eyes full of guilt.

"Am I a bad person?" He asked.

Esmeralda could hardly believe the depth of Quasimodo's pure heart. What kind of person, after taking so much mistreatment, asked if they were a bad person for not forgiving the offender? He was too good.

"No!" Esmeralda replied firmly. "You are not a bad person, Quasimodo. You're very good! It just isn't easy to forgive someone like him."

She was reminded of her own reaction to Claude's apology, during which she'd shouted that she couldn't forgive him. Esmeralda frowned at the memory.

"He apologized to me too." She shared. "And I'd like to forgive him. But..."

She trailed off, unable to find anything else to say.

Quasimodo looked at his friend with disbelief. It was a wonder to think that she was going through the same struggle as him. She'd promised to help him figure out what to do now, but perhaps he would have to help her too.

"What should we do?" Quasimodo asked.

"Well..." Esmeralda pondered aloud. "I guess we'll just have to figure it out as we go."

Claude found himself clinging to a pillow when he woke up. He sighed. This was pathetic. But he could practically hear Esmeralda speaking to him, telling him it wasn't pathetic to have feelings.

He realized why his arms were around a pillow when he remembered his dream. Claude had dreamed of having Esmeralda with him, without any of the usual awkwardness. She'd looked at him with nothing but sweetness and they'd lain together comfortably, cuddling.

It had been a good dream. One that Claude didn't think he had any right to have.

He let go of the pillow and got out of bed with a stretch. The ringing bells in the distance broke his heart. They made him think of Quasimodo with sorrow.

Claude wondered if there was any hope of having some kind of decent relationship with Quasimodo and Esmeralda. But he didn't have time to worry about that. There was business to attend to.

Today was Claude's first day of starting over. When he got dressed in his judge's robes, he told himself that a new judge had come to work. A just judge who would correct every injustice in this afflicted city, the injustices that he had caused and come to hate.

His first task of the day was to meet with the Captain of the Guard. The Captain came with obvious surprise that he had been summoned.

"You wanted to see me, Sir?" The soldier asked.

He said it before he fully saw the judge's face, after which he slightly gawked at the sight of Claude's black eye.

"Welcome, Captain." Claude greeted. "Please, ignore my appearance. It is nothing to worry about."

"Uh... If you say so." The Captain said with a repressed curiosity.

"My plans have changed." Claude informed. "I will not transfer you. You have new orders."

"And what are your orders, Sir?" The Captain inquired.

"First," Claude said with determination. "I want you to go through the dungeon and free anyone whom I have imprisoned unjustly."

The Captain stared at the judge with raised eyebrows.

"But Sir," He said with confusion. "How can I know if someone has been imprisoned unjustly?"

"Talk to the guards." Claude instructed. "Word travels in dungeons. They all know who is guilty and who is not. I was only too stubborn to care before."

"...Alright." The Captain accepted, still sounding confused.

"Next," Claude continued. "I need some data on the damage caused by the fires. How are the people holding up after my rampage?"

"Well, quite a few of them are struggling. Peasants need to focus on their income. Most of them are too busy keeping their businesses running to fully repair the damage..."

"Then we shall do it for them."

"Excuse me, Sir?"

"Find all the houses that are damaged. Then tell the men to stop slacking on the streets and start working on the repairs."

"Sir..."

"Can you do that?"

"Of course, Sir. But... Why are you ordering these things? What should I tell the men if they question it?"

Despite the bruise on his eye, Claude looked at the officer with a more confident authority than ever.

"Tell them," He started. "That Minister Frollo has made the decision to right his wrongs."

Thanks for your patience! Updates are a bit slow right now because I've had a very busy week, but I'll keep them coming!