JENNIE
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Chaeng is so selfish.
A good friend would have rationed the food in the apartment, so she could stay out of sight like I asked. But not Chaeng. She just had to go to the grocery store in broad daylight where she could've been seen by anyone. My mother wasn't in the store, but she was in her workshop when Chaeng got back to the apartment—the one located directly above my mother's workshop.
"I just can't believe you would go to such extreme lengths to lie to me. And to involve Chaeng…Jennie how could you?"
I throw my arm across my face and groan. "Mom. It's fine. Chaeng is fine. I'm fine. She needed some time alone and I needed some time away from her so I could do some book research on my That Girl."
"Ruby Jane Kim!" she whisper-shout-hisses. It's so loud, I have to pull the phone from my ear. "Are you still in that woman's house?"
I peek from beneath my arm to find Lisa lying awake next to me wearing an amused smile. I guess she heard.
My Mom starts in on me again. And instead of me getting up and barricading myself in another room so Lisa can't hear her, I turn on my side to face Lisa and put the phone on speaker between us. Her voice fills the room mid-sentence.
"…could be a sex offender. You just never know about people these days. Especially people from up there." Lisa lifts a brow and I grin. "They're not like us. I don't care how many fancy parties she takes you to or how rich she is or how nice Chaeng promised me she was, I don't trust her."
"Mom—"
"What kind of woman looks like that and isn't married?"
"Mom—"
"Chaeng showed me a picture on the Google."
"Mom—"
"But she won't tell me how to do a background check."
"Mom—"
"I've already made a pie to bribe the sheriff."
"Mom!"
"Are you having sex with her, Jennie?"
Geeze Louise.
"Mom, you're at a nine. I'm gonna need you to bring it down to a three before you get your blood pressure up. Take some deep breaths."
While she does that, I share a smile with Lisa. Usually, we're either arguing, flirting or fucking. But this feels normal. Comfortable. A little awkward considering my Mom is chanting a breathing exercise.
When I think she's had enough, I ask, "Better?"
"Much. Yes. Okay. I'm good. I'm still not good with you being there with that strange woman but I'm putting it in the Lord's hands. Thank heavens the Bible tells us He always listens to our prayers for those who are living in sin. If that wasn't the case, He'd never hear me when I prayed for you."
Lisa smirks at that.
"Thanks, Mom." My tone is dry.
"You make sure she knows that you have a mother who is going to be checking in on you regularly. So she better not try any funny stuff. I read in the newspaper, you know that column Connie writes about how to be an aware woman in a dangerous world? Anyway, just last week she said most pedophiles don't target women who have an active relationship with family and friends. They mostly target those who live lonely lives. Like…" her voice drops to a whisper, "whores."
I can't help it. I laugh. Lisa rolls her eyes and gives me the finger.
That finger.
"She's a nice girl, Mom. You have nothing to worry about."
"I'm a mother. My job is to worry, Jennie." The sadness in her voice tears at my heart.
Lisa reaches out and caresses my temple with her thumb. I force a smile that she doesn't return. She's thoughtful a moment longer. And then she does something really stupid.
"Ms. Kim?"
I dive for the phone but she grabs it and holds it out of reach. "What the fuck are you doing?" I mouth, but she ignores me.
"Ms. Kim this is Lisa Manoban. Jennie has been staying with me?" She's all amiable and smooth. Voice warm and smile big even though Mom can't see it. But it falters when my mother's tone loses its sweet southern charm and becomes matter-of-fact.
"What can I do for you, girl?"
I lean back and smirk. This may turn out to be pretty entertaining.
"I just wanted to let you know that Jennie is safe here with me. And she will be as long as she's in Chicago."
A beat of silence passes before she answers.
"Lisa, was it?"
"Yes ma'am."
"Well, Lisa, I appreciate that. And while I have you on the phone, there's something that I want you to know."
Oh Lord.
I know that voice.
"If my daughter comes home hurt, harmed, sick or crying…I'm holding you personally responsible. You do not want me to come to Chicago, Lisa. Do you understand?"
"Yes ma'am. I'll take care of her."
"Don't make promises you can't keep, young lady."
Lisa grins. "I wouldn't dream of it, Ms. Kim."
"You say that now. But Jennie can be a handful."
"I am quite aware, I assure you."
"She's been that way her whole life."
"I'm right here, Mom. And my phone is about to die." Before she can say something about that, too, I snatch the phone from Lisa, tell Mom I love her and hang up—not giving her a chance to respond, or Lisa a chance to say goodbye. Which she chastises me for with a narrow, disapproving gaze.
"I'm hungry. Can we call Uber Eats?"
Her face softens and she smirks. "You don't call Uber Eats, sweetheart. You use an app. And I've already ordered us something." She grabs her phone and swipes her finger across the screen then turns it so I can see. "It'll will be here in five minutes."
"Then I should get dressed so I'm not naked when Alfred brings it up." I roll away from her and untangle myself from the covers.
"Alfred has the morning off, but even if he didn't, he wouldn't come all the way up here and see you naked."
"You don't know that."
"Yes. I do. Just like I know Vance, the other doorman who is working today in Alfred's place, won't come in here just to see you naked, either."
"Whatever. I'm going down to meet the Uber." I wince as I stand. Everything south of my bellybutton is sore. And just like yesterday, there's nothing delicious about it. This just can't be normal. "I don't know Vance. He might be a pervert."
Despite Lisa's laugh, I can feel the burn of her stare as I make my way very slowly and very nakedly across the room. "And no sex today," I say, doing my best to avoid looking at her sprawled out in bed wearing nothing but a sheet that's tented by that damn light pole she calls a penis. "Or tomorrow. Or maybe for the rest of my life."
She chuckles. "That's a little extreme, don't you think?"
"Nope. It'll probably take that long for my vagina to shrink back to its original size."
Her groan is low and pained and I'd bet anything she's stroking herself.
"Don't say vagina, Jennie."
"It's the appropriate medical term, Lisa."
The guest bathroom seems a million miles away. I'd use hers, but I need my toothbrush. ASAP. And as bad as I want to be just like every other typical heroine in a romance novel, I don't want it bad enough to use Lisa's toothbrush.
There are some things I just won't do.
The blinds in Lisa's room are closed, but the ones in the guest room give me a full view of the ominous gray sky. It looks like a scene from The Day After Tomorrow. Everything is still. Cold. Creepy. It pains me to look at it. But not as much as it pains me to see my own reflection in the bathroom mirror.
I have that just-fucked glow without the glow. My kissed-too-hard lips are a little dry. Messy and crazy, thick, untamed curls are everywhere. Day old mascara clings to my lashes and is smudged beneath my eyes.
Not that I've looked at it, but I'm pretty sure my vagina is in the same just-fucked state as the rest of me. I fear it may be ruined. I'd hike my leg up on the counter to visually survey the damage if I weren't so scared of what I might find.
Mouth clean, bladder empty, I dig through the Miss Sims wardrobe hanging in the closet in search of something normal. I spot something gray toward the back and get excited. I think it's sweat pants.
Please let it be sweat pants….
It's…pants. Comfortable looking ones. With a matching top that has a C looped through a backwards C logo on the front. I feel like I should know what that is. I'm pretty sure it's Coach. I look at the tag.
Chanel.
I thought they just sold perfume.
"Oh my God this feels amazing." I can't stop from running my hands over the fabric. It's so soft. I don't even know what kind of material it is. But I love it.
I find some Chanel slipper shoe things and slide those on—over socks, because I'm fashionable—and head to the elevator.
Nose to the wall, humming my song, I distract myself by thinking about what food Lisa ordered. I hope it's not anything healthy like an egg white omelet or turkey bacon. She looks like the kind of girl who eats that shit. Although she is also the kind of girl who cooks real bacon shirtless. So, what do I know?
The lobby is warm and welcoming. The man sitting in his car honking the horn? Not so much. I thought he was supposed to come inside the lobby. Does he? No. He's a dick. And I'm forced to walk outside in the snow and meet him at his car.
And it's minus forty-two degrees.
The young punk that can't be a day over fifteen rolls down the window and I want to snatch the food, give him the finger and tell him to go to hell. Then I remember I have to pay him. And I have no money.
"I f-forgot your m-money." I wrap my hands around me to hold in the warmth while he stares at me like I'm stupid.
"You Mrs. Manoban?"
Mrs. Manoban.
Well, now…that has a ring to it.
"Y-yes."
"You paid with the app, lady." He holds his phone up like I'm supposed to understand the shit on the screen.
"Oh, w-well in that c-case..." I snatch the food off the seat. Give him the finger and stutter the best insult I can manage with frozen lips and jittering teeth. "G-go f-f-f-fuck yourself, you l-little shit."
"Jennie?" I straighten to find Jim Canton staring at me. Then his eyes move to the Uber driver. "Is everything alright?"
"Y-yes s-s-sir." Shit. Fuck. Damn.
"You better get inside, girl. It's freezing out here. Where is your jacket?" He holds open the door and ushers me inside, casting uneasy glances over his shoulder until the car drives away.
I move to the massive fireplace in the lobby. My bones are frozen. I'm sure of it. And I've only been outside a couple minutes. I've never felt cold like this. It's not right.
"This weather is something to get used to, isn't it?" He pulls off his thick jacket, dusts the snow from it and places it around my shoulders. Such a gentleman. Man, I miss the south.
"I have n-no intentions of g-getting used to it."
"So summers here and winters in Mississippi?"
"W-what?"
He pulls a chair closer to the fire and gestures for me to sit before getting a chair for himself. "You and Lisa. Are the two of you going to spend winters in Mississippi? To avoid the cold?"
I manage a laugh. "Oh. I'm not sure what we're going to do. Or what we even are."
"Ah. I see."
Anxious for a change in subject, I nod toward the leather briefcase in his hand. "I didn't know you and Lisa had a meeting this morning."
"Technically, we don't." His small smile is a bit sheepish. "I hate to just show up like this, but I was hoping she and I could discuss a few things this morning. And this darn cell phone of mine only works half the time." He pulls from the pocket of his shirt what has to be the original Nokia cell phone.
"Well, since Noah brought that thing over on the Ark, I have no doubt it doesn't work when it should." We share a laugh and now that my limbs have thawed and my shivering has stopped, I figure it's a good idea for me to phone Lisa and let her know we're coming up.
"Give me just a second. I'm going to call Lisa and let her know you're here so she'll be decent." Fuck! "I mean dressed." Shit. "I mean…yeah." I scramble out of my seat and across the room but not before hearing Jim's chuckle or seeing the glint of amusement in his eyes.
I grab Alfred's desk phone and hit the button labeled with a big P. It rings eight times. I know because I counted the damn things and cursed Lisa on every ring she didn't answer.
"Jennie." My knees shake at her deep tone laced with the promise of so many orgasms.
"Lisa…" I breathe, gripping the phone so tight I'm surprised it doesn't crack under my hold.
"Whose fucking jacket are you wearing?"
"What? How did you know—"
"I can see you. The surveillance cameras are linked to my phone. Now. Whose fucking jacket are you wearing?"
I look directly into the little black dome above my head and smile. "Are you jealous?"
"Yes. I won't ask you again, gorgeous."
Have mercy.
She's jealous.
Of me.
Kryptonite.
"Jim Canton is here. Just thought I'd let you know before we came up and caught you…busy."
"You didn't answer my question, Jennie."
I smile to myself and sway back and forth while I write Mrs. Manoban with my finger on the desk like a sixth grader. "It's Jim's. The Uber driver wouldn't bring the stuff inside. I had to go out and get it. In the blizzard. About froze to death." I poke my lip out and look up at the camera. "It was awful, Lisa."
"That son-of-a-bitch."
I bat my lashes at her. "What are you going to do?"
There's a beat of silence as the rustle of fabric brushes over the phone. She must be getting dressed. "I'll tell you what I'm going to do," she growls. My blood heats at the imminent promise of torture she'll deliver to defend my honor. "I'm going to leave that motherfucker a bad review."
Wait.
What?
"A bad review?"
"That's right."
"Okay, stop with the Batman voice. Now you just sound ridiculous. We're coming up." I hang up before my desire for her ebbs even more.
Jim, who has been listening to only one side of the conversation, fights his laughter as he joins me. "Sounds like the weather isn't the only thing you're not used to. City girl are a lot different."
"I know, right? Whatever happened to the kind of good ol' chivalry where people beat the shit out of another people? Don't they know it's way hotter than fighting someone with lawyers or…bad reviews?" I have to choke the last word out.
His strong laughter fills the room. "I've no doubt Lisa would handle business physically if it came down to that." He brushes his shoulder against mine and winks. "Don't be too hard on her. It isn't her fault she's a city slicker. I'm sure she more than makes up for it in other departments."
Is he talking about…
No.
He's not.
There is nothing suggestive about what he says. He probably means she's intelligent. Powerful. Rich…
"You're right. I mean, she does have a Rolex."
"One of those real fancy watches?"
"Yep. I think the cheapest ones are like twenty grand. So I'm sure hers cost well over a hundred."
"For a watch?"
"Mmhm."
"Does she know that it just…tells time?"
I look up at him and smile. "Jim. I think we're soul mates. Excuse me."
He chuckles, but it dies when I face the corner and start humming. I can feel him looking. Like they all look. Not that I care.
"That was…strange," he says, once we make it to Lisa's floor.
"I am a strange girl, Jim."
I look up and Lisa is standing in the doorway to greet us. Wearing a white Henley. And jeans. And she's barefoot. And I just died and went to heaven.
Her smile is wide. Eyes fixated on me. And I'm positive she's about to say something sexy and sweet and swoony. Like maybe I'm her perfect kind of strange.
"Batshit crazy is more like it."
Or not.
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Lisa and Jim have been in Lisa's office for forever.
I've eaten my pancake breakfast platter.
Took a shower.
Dug through Miss Sims's wardrobe.
Found nothing as awesome as that Chanel pants suit.
Put the pants suit back on.
Straightened the guest bathroom.
Made Lisa's bed.
Run out of lives on Toy Blast.
Texted Chaeng to send me another life.
Stupidly sent her a selfie of me wearing Chanel.
Now I'm waiting for her response.
I get the middle finger emoji.
And no life for Toy Blast.
So, so jealous.
I glance at the clock and realize "forever" has only been a few hours. It feels like longer because, though she's only feet from me, I can't see Lisa. And I miss her. I miss her face. Mouth. Lips. Humor. I even miss her anger. And when I think about her, I get the sensation that I'm high.
Not high on pot, though. The few times I've done that, I just thought about stupid things like how numbers tasted. And whether it was the s or the c that was silent in the word scent. By the way, I still haven't figured that out.
Yeah. This definitely doesn't feel like I'm high on pot. It's more like I'm high on meth.
Not that I've done meth. But I hear it heightens your senses. Causes you to run really fast. Makes you never want to sleep again.
Maybe that's vampire venom….
Whatever.
Bottom line?
I'm falling for Lisa Manoban.
She dominates my mind, my body and my heart.
My blood tickles when I think about her.
My nipples harden with every sore step I take.
My pulse speeds at the smell of her that's everywhere.
Last night, I was convinced I was falling in love. Today, I've decided to reevaluate the situation, considering I'm not under the influence of a post coital, mind numbing orgasm. And because I'm bored and have ten minutes until I generate a life on Toy Blast.
So, is it lust or is it love?
Lust is where it's at. Lust intensifies the moment. Amplifies the experience. Creates a sexual attraction that leads to a sexual encounter that leaves you walking funny while simultaneously anticipating the next time she bottoms out inside you. But lust is also something you can walk away from. Something you can smile about if you want to remember. Or something you can choose to forget.
Love?
Give your heart to someone and you'll regret it. Be it today, tomorrow or one hundred years from now, you will one day feel the downside. Nothing that great comes without repercussions. Which is exactly why love is so powerful.
If I had a choice, I'd choose lust. Problem is, it's not that easy. This isn't multiple choice. I don't get to choose anything. My heart gets that honor. And that stupid bitch has done nothing but make bad decisions since she tried to burst out of my chest at the sight of Eddie Smith stripping down to a cape and a pair of Ninja Turtle underwear during my sixth birthday party.
If only my heart were as smart as my vagina.
To hell with my heart.
My mind is made up.
It is lust that I feel.
Lust doesn't result in loss.
Only rewards.
There is no reward when it comes to love.
Love will cripple you.
Then again, fucking Lisa Manoban will also cripple you.
So really…what the hell do I know?
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