Darkest Hero

So before the usual Q and A section allow me to ask you a question. We all know inevitably Inko will get hold of Shigi again and given the reoccuring theme we have here of songs being added, which do you want to see added to the story?

1: Robot Hell parody

2: Other Friends Parody

3: welcome to the internet parody

4: Righteous hand of God

5: other?

Now onto the Q and A segment.

Q: Mineta is working at Fazbears?

A: yes, yes he is.

Q: Pentagram city has free healthcare?!

A: well considering hell is where Americans fear to end up, what would be scarier to them then free healthcare? (I joke)

Q: Did you really just do a FNAF musical number?

A: yes. I've done one other song so far, that being a parody of Alister's game (sorry for spelling, my phone is being weird)

Q: I AM A DWARF!

A: AND IM DIGGING A HOLE!

Q: how is Mineta still alive? Also poor Mangle. Nobody deserves to be covered in that.

A: it's Mineta the brat has plot armor in cannon, also yes poor Mangle.

Q: Uh is Kiri gonna start dating Mina?

A: nope, they see each other as siblings.

Q: how did his dad die?

A: 49 times... We fought that beast. Honestly tho Inko killed him for trying to harm Izuku when he was a kid.

Q: what happened to Nomu and Toga?

A: Nomu ripped the sleeping bag the other chapter, it was tasked to find one that fits it, Toga got the short straw to help it.

Chapter 44: teleporting bread.

It was a slow morning in the hotel as a half asleep Charlie yawned and sat up with a stretch. Bleerily looking around she took note of everyone sleeping around them, the faintest hints of the sun rising over the horizon. With a lazy blink she looked down. Izuku had slept next to her much to the protests of Iida initially until Inko pointed out they were all but married which lead to fierce blushing from both demons and a stuttering Iida before Aizawa said to shut up and go to sleep. What was different however was the small sleeping form of Eri tucked between them, a small red eyed bunny with sharp teeth was wrapped in her arms as she snored softly.

"Ohmygoshsoprecious." Charlie whisper screamed really quickly. Never in her life had she seen such an adorable sight.

"Charls, too early." Izuku muttered tiredly and half asleep as he slowly rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

"Sorry but so cute." Charlie whispered back.

"GAH! FUCK OFF!" A loud explosion from the barricade where Bakugo had hidden himself exploded in a fireball as Cherry Bomb was sent flying across the room giggling. Huddled against the wall was Bakugo wide eyed and breathing heavily.

"Aw come on! You're so hot!" Cherry Bomb huffed as she stood up, her clothes barely singed. "We could make such lovely explosions together."

"Oh barf." Mina gagged as Bakugo Noped out of the situation, sprinting off for wherever the fuck in the hotel he was going, Cherry Bomb hot on his trail.

"So who's the unmanly jerk who wakes us up with a bomb?" Kirishima groaned, having fallen asleep on the floor with no blankets or sleeping bag to prove how manly he was, only he probably just ended up with a sore back.

"That would be the flaming pile of garbage known as Bakahoe." Toru huffed from her spot next to Sero who was blushing slightly and now sporting a hickey on his neck.

"That is highly disrespectful!" Iida called as he made a chopping motion but was promptly ignored.

"Bakugo." Izuku corrected absently as Eri let out a cute yawn and sat up, snuggling the bunny as she did so. "Uh. Good morning?"

"Hi oniichan." Eri uttered softly, rubbing her left eye as she did so. "You and charlie-san were comfy."

"So precious." Ochako gushed as she held her own cheeks sending the bob haired girl skywards.

"Uh, should we uh, get her down?" Kendo asked as she blinked owlishly up at the floating girl.

"I got it " Kyoka sighed as she shrugged off the jacket of her hero costume and with a flex her wings popped out. In a single flap she was upto Ochako's height and Brough the gushing girl back down, sporting a matching blush. "Be careful b-baka."

"So anyway, dining room is this way if anybody wants breakfast, knowing Nifty she made a buffet again." Charlie called, getting attention away from the blushing couple much to their relief.

"What's the time even?" Tokoyami asked tiredly as he tried to clean the melted cheese from his hands. Apparently Kira had gone for a midnight snack.

"Sun up." Riko muttered softly as she glared balefully at the morning sun. She wasn't a morning person at all.

"Wait, where is Hatsume?" Aizawa asked loudly mere moments before a loud explosion detonated at the far end of the room and Mei and Baxter were sent flying through the air, both crashing into Thirteen who was shocked at the sudden impact.

"What did you do to the hotel?!" Charlie cried in shock and horror.

Mei grinned widely, her goggles having fallen over her eyes. "Haha! I teleported bread!"

"How much?!" Aizawa demanded as the outline of a massive figure was visible through the dust.

"I have done nothing but teleport bread since 3AM!" Mei grinned back.

"Oh no." Aizawa sighed, knowing damn well what was about to happen.

"I tried to stop her." Baxter groaned in pain, his arm as a odd angle to what it should be.

A guttural roar and the sound of soggy bread slapping on the ground filled the air as a massive load of moldy green stained tumor riddled monster bread flopped through the hole the explosion had made.

"Kill it quickly!" Izuku shouted as his head ignited with green hellfire burning off all but his muscular structure from his head as he charged for the beast. Charlie wasn't far behind him, having summoned her trident with a flourish. Toga who had been hiding behind the bar for some reason jumped over the counter, a broken bottle of jacks in her hand as she gave a psychotic giggle. The Nomu merely growled as it stood protectively next to Eri while Momo made a bo staff and started wacking the creature's face.

"Hey wait for me!" Kirishima called as he changed the monster too. It was useless however as he was almost instantly swatted aside where he slammed into a table.

"No! My baby!" Mei called in despair as the group proceeded to try to rip the creature to literal shreds seconds after it flattened a gadget Mei had dropped when she was sent flying.

"It's okay." Eri smiled brightly as she tugged the pinkette's pants. "Mummy says don't be sad when things die be happy that they were."

"Why is the kid a pasifier?" Mei asked in confusion.

"What? That's the things kids suck on." Kendo asked in confusion at Mei's analogy.

"No that's a pedophile." Angel dust called as they walked in, a pop tart in hand as they watched the ensuring battle.

"What?! That is something completely different!" Aizawa snapped at the demon.

"Eh not really down here. But yeah my wind went to the gutter." Angel dust shrugged uncaringly.

"The word you wanted was Philosopher." Baxter groaned in pain as he tried to snap his arm back into place.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!" Bakugo screamed as he dove off of the 2nd highest balcony in the hotel's internal structure onto the bread demon. The ensuing blast merely aggravated the bread demon which swatted Bakugo back up to the waiting arms of Cherry Bomb.

"Oh explosion-boy!" Cherry bomb cooed from the upper levels. "I knew you loved me!"

"Please. Help me." Bakugo groaned as the cyclops demon dragged him off.

"Kindred soul." Aizawa muttered softly, truely in this one instance he felt sorry for Bakugo, mostly it was from his experience with Miss Joke.

"No more misses nice god." Inko growled from above, her form draped in a night gown covered in chibi terrasques as a dark miasma pooled in her left hand. Taking the hint the group jumped away in fright moments before the vortex struck the monster.

The creature shrieked loudly, it's form bubbling, pulsing with energy as it inflated too large for it's form to hold before with the sound of a thousand bursting water balloons it burst. Charred bread good and tumors flooded the area covering just about everyone in the goo.

"Oh nasty." Momo gagged in disgust as she tried to shake the stuff off of her her left foot.

"The flipping Caine damned heck happened here?!" Nifty shrieked as she walked in, a long trolly covered in breakfast foods being pulled along behind her.

"I teleported bread." Mei grinned proudly.

"Good you get to clean it." Nifty pouted with puffed cheeks.

"Aw man." Mei groaned as she slouched slightly.

"I'll get my friends to help." Eri smiled happily. "Mr Stripe and Mr Crite love food so they'll be happy to help."

"Thanks." Mei sighed as Nifty handed the pinkette a mop.

"Shouldn't take longer than 3 hours which is around how long you have until IMP arrives." Nifty huffed as she finished pulling the trolley of food into the room. "Everybody but pink girl come and get some breakfast!"

"Oh my god." Ochako uttered in shock upon seeing the spread.

"It's almost as much as the chefs used to make." Momo uttered.

"Did it all herself too." Alister grinned as he walked into the room before looking up at Inko who was watching from the balcony. "Inko my dearest would you wish to join us for breakfast?"

"I'll be done in a minute." Inko called. "Save me some pancakes!"

"Will do!" Alister called as Inko disappeared back inside the room.

"Thank you miss Nifty." Eri grinned as she took a single apple for herself and some waffles for the Nomu who was now sitting on the floor next to a table.

"Aw you're welcome sweety!" Nifty grinned back nervously.

"Cow-bunger!" A raspy voice called as a small black spiky ball dove into the bread monster slop from the 2nd story.

"Hi mister Crite!" Eri called happily.

"Lots. Food! Good good yes?" The creature cackled before faceplanting into a large chunk of bread monster and started eating.

"I don't even know who or what that one is." Izuku stated with a raised eyebrow while he absently grabbed some pancakes.

"Me either but it's friends with young Eri here." Alister admitted, snagging several English breakfast sausages for himself while putting food on a second plate for Inko.

It was at this time the doors were booted open revealing a very unamused looking Blitz, besides him was a pink skinned demon in a short skirt and sweater.

Blitz cut off whatever Charlie was about to say as he screamed. "WHAT THE CAINE DAMNED FUCK HAPPENED?!"

"Oniichan and his friends and mummy blew up the bread monster." Eri intoned cutely.

"I see. Uh...who's kid is this?" Blitz asked in confusion as he blinked owlishly at Eri.

"She's my sister." Izuku spoke up.

"I see." Blitz blinked with a blank expression before he noticed Alister and gulped nervously.

"Ah blitzo my dear man I was looking to make a business proposal for you but first I do believe breakfast is in order." Alister grinned widely, static dancing around him making many in the room back off and shudder fearfully.

"It's uh...uhm...n-never mind." Blitz gulped nervously, too terrified to attempt to correct the radio demon.

While this was going on, Eri shrug and went to explore the piles of bread monster goop that covered half the room, Nomu lumbering after her.

"So. You kill people? And get PAID to do it?" Toga asked Blitz with a curious expression.

"Yes indeed we do young lady!" Blitz gave his best business man grin as he clapped his hands together.

"Hmm. Izu-san doesn't like killing humans." Toga hummed softly before a feral grin stretched across her face. "Hey can I get a job on provision I don't have to kill good humans?"

"Sure why not." Blitz shrugged. "Pay is 1200 souls per kill or 8% of the contract cost, whichever is smaller."

"Do I get to make thing bleed?" Toga asked, her head tilted to the side.

"Given the amount of blood they drag in on the rugs I'd say yes." The pink demon sighed with a roll of her eyes.

"Deal." Toga quickly agreed as Inko entered the room, now properly dressed in a green knee high dress and a yellow shirt with a grey sweater over it.

"Holy fuck?! Inko??" The pink demon gaped in horror.

"Hmm? Oh do I know you?" Inko asked.

"Uh yeah." The demon winced. "I'm Mrs Mayberry."

"I see." Inko smiled politely before casually backhanding the woman across the room to the shock of everyone. "Ever traumatize my son again Mayberry and I'll personally make what happened to Kronus look like child's play. Clear?"

"Clear ..." Mayberry groaned in pain from where she landed next to Thirteen. The rescue hero already checking her over to make sure she was ok.

"Good. You can make it up to him by acting as his secretary." Inko grinned.

"Hey she works for me!" Blitz snapped.

"Is that right?" Inko asked Blitz giving the same smile she did moments before.

"And you can have her!" The imp squeaked.

"Mad revelry." Tokoyami uttered while Shoto frowned harder, the entire situation was something he had seen his father attempt to pull with his sister Fumi and the at the time rookie hero Hawks.

"Nope." Aizawa uttered as he flopped over in his sleeping bag. "Well above my pay grade."

"Uh explanation?" Momo asked uncertainly.

"She kinda went nuts and killed her husband Infront of my 2nd year class ages ago." Izuku shuddered.

"The contract that resulted from it payed well though." Blitz grinned with no shame at all before he deadpanned "Anyway, finish up your grub and pack your shit, I have a contract early today killing some Bosnian mafia boss and you're all just lucky I woke up early."

End.

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