Santana was beginning to think that with the amount of stupid tasks Quinn was giving both her and Brittany, it wouldn't be accurate to say she, or Brittany, had had maid of honours at their wedding. Hers was Puck, so there was of course that, but even Quinn herself did not do half the tasks she was expecting of Santana. They'd spent hours browsing through Pinterest and bridal magazines trying to pick a colour palette and creating a mood board of what the actual design of the wedding would be. That hadn't been too bad. Santana actually enjoyed sitting with Quinn and Brittany the day after Sophia's birthday, drinking wine and throwing around ideas. She hadn't really done that for theirs since Disney world had pitched them with design ideas. She was even fine taking a long lunch to do it again on the Monday after Sophia's birthday. But three days was pushing it. They had created seven different mood boards, of which Quinn couldn't pick her favourite.
Now she was looking a the list of stuff Quinn wanted to get done by the end of November and she was getting a headache.
"Do you really want a live band and a DJ?" Brittany asked, setting down her own list. Quinn had taken the liberty to print four copies of her list, one for each of them and one for Eve, who was supposed to make sure Santana and Brittany stopped forgetting their commitments.
"Yes." Quinn cut a thin slice of ham, spearing it with her fork and handing it to Brittany. "Taste this."
Today they were at Quinn's, which Santana supposed was better than driving all around town. She'd had an assortment of meats delivered from her restaurant, so they could do a food tasting and decide on the menu.
Santana was pretty sure no one decided on their menu eight months before the wedding, but Quinn had nearly bit her head off when she pointed that out.
"Delicious." Brittany moaned.
"Better or worse than the chicken?"
"Oh the chicken was good!"
Santana bit her lip to keep from laughing.
"But better or worse than beef?"
"Ooohh" Brittany reached over and took a piece of the pepper steak. "So good." She said with a full mouth.
"Don't forget the mushroom sauce." Santana said, handing the small bowl over.
"Brittany!" Quinn cried, as she took another piece to dip into the sauce. Brittany paused, even in her chewing, to stare wide eyed at Quinn. "Which is better?"
Brittany swallowed quickly.
"Chicken." She said, then frowned, "No the beef." She tossed the steak with sauce into her mouth and nodded. "Definitely the beef."
Quinn bent over the table, hurriedly scribbling on a notepad.
"But the ham with the honey-" Brittany broke off as Quinn looked up, glaring at her. "No, the steak." She said frantically. "It's the steak."
"Santana?" Quinn asked.
"Uh…I'm thinking the seafood is my go. Hams fine, but it's your wedding you know." Quinn nodded. "The creamy chicken is really good, so I'd want to go for that, but the shrimp was so freaking good."
"We can have shrimp cocktails."
"Oh yes!" Brittany said excitedly. "So fancy."
Quinn chuckled, though she was once again focused on her notepad.
"So you like the chicken more than the steak?"
"Yeah." Santana nodded.
"Okay." She reached for a piece of chicken, placing it in her mouth and chewing slowly.
"Yeah that's good." She licked her lips. "And it can be paired with more options."
"True."
"The chicken is a good choice." Brittany said. "Honestly Quinn they're all fantastic."
Grinning, Quinn dropped the notebook and walked into the kitchen.
"I know." She opened the fridge and took out a bottle of water. "Do you guys want one?" Brittany and Santana shook their heads. Quinn closed the fridge. "The whole restaurant is really excited about this."
"Of course they are. Most of them have been watching their boss' tragic love life going on for five years."
"My love hasn't been tragic since I moved here." Quinn rolled her eyes.
"Eeeh" Brittany cocked her head. "I would say Ashton was tragic."
"He moved to India and I-"
"Was heartbroken." Santana interjected. "You drank for three straight weeks."
"But then I was fine." Quinn shrugged, walking back over to the dining table.
"If you think swearing off love and romance-"
"And sex" Brittany added.
"And sex." Santana chuckled, "for a good two years, is fine, then sure you were."
"We're off topic." Quinn picked up her notebook, hiding behind it as Brittany and Santana laughed. "Do you think three types of meat is too many?"
"Yes." Santana said. "Give people two options. They can have chicken or beef, for example, otherwise your bill will be crazy."
"Makes sense." Quinn wrote down on her notebook. "Then we can do rice, potatoes and maybe some bread along the tables."
"Like breadsticks!" Santana and Brittany said at the same time. They grinned at each other.
"Yes." Quinn laughed. "I'll also need salad option, we can do that tasting maybe on…Friday?" She took out her phone, Santana presumed she was looking at the calendar. "Yeah, I can squeeze it in between our meeting with the web designer."
"Wait what?" Santana asked loudly. "Web designer? For what?"
"For our website." Quinn answered casually.
Santana turned to Brittany, glad to at least see that this information was shocking to her too.
"Your wedding has a website?" Brittany asked.
"Of course. All the wedding checklist sites say to have one. We'll be sending out the link next month, that's where everyone can choose their meal options and find our gift registry which…." Her eyes widened comically. "Shit we haven't finished it yet. I'll talk to Theo about that, we need to finish it tonight."
Santana shook her head, deciding to ask no more questions as Quinn types furiously on her phone. She'd never heard of anyone creating an entire website for their wedding, but this was Quinn, who always had to outdo everyone.
"Oh that reminds me, Santana did you get a chance to call any of the hotels yet?"
"No, since you literally told me to do it on Monday."
"No pressure or anything." Quinn said, putting her phone down. "I think as long as we do I t before the New Year, rates won't be too bad. We're going to give guests the option of booking their accommodation through us instead of directly with the hotels, since booking as a group gives you better rates, I'll let you know as soon as we get proper numbers, but for now stick with the 50 people I told you."
Brittany's mouth dropped open.
"Quinn!" She gasped. "How many people did you invite to this wedding?"
Quinn shrugged.
"My family and Theo's makes about twenty…twenty five. We're still waiting on RSVPs from some of his cousins. There's the glee gang, that's another ten, ten friends of mine from Yale, some of Theo's old University friends…they're about ten as well. Your families…honestly we might get to seventy out of town guests."
"What's the total guest list?" Santana asked.
"We have one hundred confirmed so far. I think we might get to one hundred and fifty. That's what we've told the venue anyway."
"Is your dad coming?" Brittany asked.
"Yeah." Quinn nodded. Santana wasn't sure if Quinn looked sad, but she didn't look happy about it either.
"And Beth?" She asked hesitantly. This time there was a definite drop in Quinn's expression.
"Shelby said she'll come, but she isn't sure about Beth…she's really busy with college and everything."
"It'll be summer." Santana blurted before she could stop herself. She regretted it as a pained look crossed Quinn's face.
"I don't know." Quinn sighed. "She…She didn't answer my call. Puck said she barely replies to his texts…"
"She's processing." Brittany said, standing and putting an arm around Quinn. "She's just…trying to figure out how to feel about it all."
"Yeah she doesn't hate you."
"She should."
"Quinn!"
"I gave her up." Quinn said dejectedly. "I gave her away and then I lied to her."
"You didn't lie to her." Brittany said soothingly.
"It was Shelby's idea not to tell her." Santana said, standing as well. "She should be mad at her, not you."
"She can't be mad at the mother who wanted her."
Neither Santana nor Brittany knew what to say. They never really knew what to say when it came to Beth. It was such a sore topic, even after all this time, and nothing they said ever seemed to make Quinn feel better. Santana knew there was no way she could ever understand what Quinn was feeling. She had no idea what it felt like to be pregnant and grow a child, and no idea what it felt like to give that child up.
Brittany's phone rang, breaking the increasingly depressing energy that had been building around them. She let go of Quinn, fishing it out of her pocket.
"Oh." She stared at her phone.
"What's up?" Santana asked.
"Uh." Brittany glanced at her, then at Quinn, removing her arm from around her. "Nothing. Work. Sorry I have to take this."
Santana took over hugging Quinn as Brittany walked out of the room.
"She doesn't hate you." Sher repeated. "She loves you. That's why she's mad."
"Yeah."
"Give her some time, show her you're not going anywhere, and she'll come around."
"And how is she going to feel when I tell her I'm pregnant?"
"She'll be happy for you."
"You sure about that?"
"Yes. Because…" Santana exhaled sharply. "Look once she gets over her feelings a little bit, she'll realise that you and Puck were younger than she is now when you had her. She'll realise you did the best thing for her.
"It's been three years." Quinn pulled out of Santana's hold, wiping her cheeks. Santana hadn't even realised Quinn had started crying. "She found out three years ago Santana. Don't you think if she was going to get over her feelings she would have by now?"
Santana was saved from having to answer by Brittany walking back in, looking guilty.
"What?"
"I'm so sorry." She said, looking mostly at Quinn.
"Why?" Quinn asked.
"I have to go."
"I thought you had the day off."
"Yeah but, they need me now…to handle something."
"Can't Kaleb do it?" Santana asked.
Brittany bit her lip, and Santana could see she was genuinely torn.
"No." She finally sighed. "I'm sorry." She said again.
"It's fine Britt." Quinn walked over and hugged her. "I'll see you tomorrow?"
"Absolutely. For the…for…"
Chuckling, Quinn pulled back. "We're meeting the florists."
"Right! The florists!"
Brittany walked round Quinn and pulled Santana into a hug.
"And I'll see you later."
"Yep" Santana hugged her tight. "I might be a little late for dinner, but yes."
"Great." Brittany let her go, instead cupping her face and kissing her. "I love you."
"I love you."
"Don't forget tomorrow!" Quinn said seriously, pointing a finger at Brittany as she walked to the living room to get her purse and coat.
"I won't." Brittany giggled. "And if I do you'll just call and remind me so stop worrying."
Brittany was so excited by the time she got to her studio, that she forgot her keys in the ignition in her rush to get out, and only realised as she was walking past the reception. She had to sprint back the entire way, praying the car hadn't locked yet. Thankfully, it was still unlocked.
She jogged back into the building.
"Everything okay Brittany?" The receptionist asked as she walked back a second time.
"Yeah just forgot my keys." She jingled them for the receptionist to see. "But all good."
"I'm glad." The receptionist laughed. "I didn't think you were coming in today. I don't have you on the roster."
"Yeah I'm not here to work really…" She left it at that, not wanting to get into why she was there.
"Oh okay. Well have a good time….not working."
"Thanks." Brittany grinned.
She tried to calm down as she walked through the building, first to her office, where she dropped her purse, then to studio 2. There were two suitcases stashed outside the studio door, one a light purple and one an army design. It brought Brittany's excitement crashing back.
Music hit her as soon as she pushed open the door, then she took in the sight of Kaleb moonwalking and giggled. He'd never been that great at moonwalking. He looked up at the sound of her laugh.
"Britt!" He said happily, which drew the attention of the two kids in front of him. They spun to face her, grins pulling at their faces.
"Hi Brittany." Ryan said, walking towards her. Kaycee waved enthusiastically.
"Hey kiddos."
Kaleb lowered the volume so they didn't have to shout.
"This place is so cool." Ryan said, looking around the dance studio. "Much nicer than our studio in L.A."
"The people here make a lot of money." Kaleb said. He one-arm hugged Brittany. "Britt here is one of the top earners for the studio."
"For the studio?" Kaycee asked, titling her head to the side.
"Yeah" Brittany said. "See, part of what we do here, aside from working for the studio as dancers, is train other dancers. And the better we are at that, the more people want to work with the studio cause they know they'll get good dancers."
"And Brittany's the best." Kalen said, winking at Ryan and Kaycee. They both smiled. "Everybody always requests Brittany's dancers, and all the dancers know that, so every year there's a scramble to get into her classes."
"Syth's the best." Brittany told the kids seriously, trying not to blush.
"At whipping everyone into shape and weeding out the bad eggs, sure. But no one is better at getting dancers to that next level than you Britt."
"Okay." Brittany shifted out from under Kaleb's arm, feeling uncomfortable with how Kaleb's praise was making Ryan and Kaycee look at her. "Everyone here is really great, which is why I wanted you guys to come down here."
"Are we going to be joining your classes?" Ryan asked, looking excited.
"For the week, you'll be shadowing me. I wanted to see if there was anything I could actually offer you guys, before making it official."
"My mum said if you decide to do this, she will move out here with me." Ryan said. "If me living in L.A would make it impossible.
"And my mum and dad said that I can stay with Ryan and his mum, but I should go home at least once a month."
Brittany wasn't shocked by this. Kids like Ryan and Kaycee often had parents ready to do whatever it took for their kids to be the best. From taking them homeschooling them so that they can go to dance classes during the day, to driving them across the country for auditions and competitions. She'd known that hearing an acclaimed and well known, not to mention influential dancer like Brittany wanted to personally mentor their kids would go over fantastically with them.
Still, she felt bad. She wasn't exactly going to be paying Ryan and Kaycee. Ryan's mother would most likely have to find a job in San Jose in order to sustain them moving there. Brittany was going to have to find a way to make it worth it. Following her around the studio would not cut it.
"That's good to know." She said. "But let's worry about that later. I'll have a proper meeting with your parents and we can work it out."
She and Kaleb gave Ryan and Kaycee a full tour of the studio, from the offices to all thirteen dance studios to the break rooms and lounges. They took everything in with growing excitement, that was rubbing off on Brittany.
They stopped at the senior choreographers' lounge, finding it empty. As Ryan and Kaycee got some food, Brittany and Kaleb sat on the couch, switching on the tv.
"I can't believe I'm going to say this, but I think you're actually going to be able to pull this off Britt."
Brittany smiled. "Yeah I think I might."
Kaleb shook his head, lifting his left foot onto his right knee and leaning back against the cushions.
"I should have known you'd find a way."
"I haven't really."
"How's that? You heard them, their parents are willing to let them move."
"Yeah for what?" Brittany glanced behind her into the kitchen, Ryan and Kaycee were still making sandwiches. "To watch me teach? To take my classes?"
"We'll come up with something." He put his hand on her knee. "But just being your students opens doors for them Britt."
"I guess."
"Jesus must be excited."
Brittany smiled again.
"He doesn't know yet."
"Oh please let me come pick him with you!"
Brittany cast her eyes down, biting anxiously at her lip.
"I know that look." Kaleb sat forward. "What've you done Brittany."
"I…I don't think I'll go with them to pick Jesus today."
"What? Why not, he'll be thrilled!"
"Because…I mean don't you think seeing them will kind of…I mean he won't want to go home."
"When does he ever want to go home?"
"I don't know. I just think it's better to wait…a bit…"
Kaleb frowned, dropped his leg, scooting forward to the end of the couch so he could properly look at Brittany.
"Brittany." Brittany glanced at him. "What did you do?"
Sighing, Brittany cast one more look behind her.
"Okay." She said, lowering her voice. "It's just…Santana's been really stressed lately."
"Oh no." Kaleb sat back, shaking his head. "Don't tell me, I don't want to know. I'd rather be innocent when come looking for me."
"I just don't think having more kids in our house is going to exactly ease her stress."
"You're telling me you flew these kids out here to stay for a month and you haven't told your wife?"
"She doesn't need to know if they're staying with you." Brittany tried to smile. Kaleb didn't smile back.
"Are you kidding?"
"Kaleb-"
"Brittany you should have talked to me about this before you flew them out here." He hissed, lowering his voice even more. "You're not exactly giving me a chance to say no."
"That's kind of the point."
"You don't want to talk to your wife so you're burdening me-"
"Hey!" Brittany said sharply, her smile dropping. "This isn't about me not wanting to talk to my wife."
"Of course it is." Kaleb said loudly. Brittany gripped his arm, warning him to lower his tone once again.
"Come on." She stood up, pulling him with her. "We're just going to talk quickly okay?" She told Kaycee and Ryan, who were both staring at them. "We'll be right back."
She led Kaleb outside, walking a few steps away from the door so they wouldn't be overheard.
"I'll talk to Santana, that's not the prob-"
"Stop it Brittany." He pushed her hand of his, taking a step away. "For over a month you've been skirting around Santana, too afraid to ask her what's going on with her, pretending you're not still worried about her. Pretending you don't care, and I don't know why!"
Brittany crossed her arms over her chest. "I'm not afraid to talk to her, you don't know what you're talking about." Kaleb scoffed. "I just don't think it's necessary for me to be all…in her face about it. She's trying to write an album, and like I said, she's str-"
"Stressed yeah." Kaleb rolled his eyes. "And you're supposed to take all that onto your shoulders why? It's not like she didn't know what going back to work would mean. She doesn't get to just dump everything on you-"
"Just shut up!" Brittany yelled, surprising even herself. She was breathing hard. "You don't get to talk to me about Santana anymore do you understand? I get that you're my friend, and it's your job to be on my side all the time, but with me and Santana there are no sides. You don't get to tell me what she should do for me, or how she should treat me when you can't possibly understand what she does for me every single day just by being my wife. You don't understand her, and you don't understand what she's been doing for me and for our family for the last five years."
Kaleb at least seemed to register that he'd crossed a line. His scowl dropped.
"All this time we've had to choreograph and tour other studios and shoot music videos, we got that because of her. She's been doing exactly what I've been doing for the last month and what, you think that's her dumping all the responsibilities on me?" Brittany shook her head. "Santana cooked dinner every night. She picked the kids from school every day. She was the one called when there was a problem at school, she was home alone with them when I left for the convention. Kaleb I know how much work it is, I've seen her do it. So yeah, I'm taking it on my shoulders, so that she can rebuild her career. So that she can do the thing she loves for once, without worrying about turning into her parents. I'm trying to give her that stability, that assurance so…" Brittany licked her lips. "Maybe I'm not in a rush to admit that I keep bringing chaos into our lives when I keep telling her I want to do the opposite. I invited Mercedes to live with us and now…" she looked at the door for studio room two, "now I've added two extra kids to our lives." She sighed.
"I'm sorry." Kaleb said. "I just wish you'd asked me, instead of springing it on me like this. I'm not exactly used to living with or taking care of kids."
"Yeah." Brittany dropped her crossed arms. "I'm sorry too. That was really poopy of me."
Kaleb jerked his head back, grimacing.
"What did you just say?"
"Mateo said shit the other day."
"WHAT?" Kaleb's eyes popped.
"Yep. He fell doing one of his Karate kicks and just yelled it."
"Unbelievable."
"Imagine my reaction. We had to sit him down and give him a speech about bad words, and then I had to sit Santana down-"
"And give her the same speech?"
Brittany giggled, feeling the last of the tension between them evaporate.
"I am worried…but not about Santana." She admitted. "I know she'll come talk to me eventually."
"What are you worried about then?"
"I'm worried about the pressure she's under, and the pressure she's putting on herself, and the pressure Malek is putting her under. This album is important, believe me I get that, but she's had other important albums. Her first and second album….Those were crazy important."
"Yeah."
"But I've never seen her like this. This one is different."
"You know what I think?" Kaleb walked forward looping his arm through Brittany's.
"What?"
"I think we ought to meet this…Malek."
"Why?"
"So we can get a feel on him. You know everyone else in Santana's life, now there's this guys she's spending all her time with, baring her soul to-"
"How do you know she's baring her soul?" Brittany asked worriedly.
"I just figure, writing a song can be vulnerable…and you said Santana was really emotional in the studio."
"Jade told me." She nodded. She hadn't told Kaleb that Santana had been crying. She didn't think Santana would appreciate that too much, considering she liked to keep her tough reputation in tact.
"Yeah, but now Jade isn't in there anymore is she? Just this Malek guy."
"Yeah."
"So we have to meet him. Suss him out. See what he's about."
Brittany figured that wasn't a bad idea. She didn't like having blank spots when it came to Santana, maybe that was where her unease was coming from. Matter of fact, Brittany decided it may be time to have lunch with Jade and find out what really happened that week she'd been in L.A. She'd meet them both as soon as she got back from Nashville.
A completely empty house, for the first time since Quinn and Theo took the kids with them to Lima two years ago. Santana loved it. She slept in, which sadly only meant waking up at eight rather than six, but it felt like she'd slept the morning away. She drank a mimosa, singing loudly to the music blaring through the house as she did laundry, and then finally at eleven, decided to go in to the office. She was getting sick of being in the studio. A month a half of being cooped in there with Malek was more than enough, despite the amount of work they'd managed to get done. She was actually ahead of schedule, which had an amazing effect on her anxiety, and allowed her to do things like going in at eleven.
Still, Santana knew that she was lucky. Malek didn't have to be helping her the way he was. He was putting in just as much time as her, just as much effort, even though it wasn't his career on the line. She'd have to remember to thank him in her acceptance speech at the Grammy's.
Smiling to herself, Santana walked into the studio. Jade was in the lobby, talking to the receptionist. Santana felt her stomach turn. She hadn't talked to Jade since she'd ripped into her and kicked her out. She often though about calling to apologise, but her pride kept getting in the way. She didn't want to call and have Jade not answer, and know she was ignoring her. So she always told herself she would apologise when she saw Jade at the studio. But of course, she usually arrived early in the morning and left late at night, spending the entire time in the studio. There was never any opportunity for her to run into Jade.
Until now.
Truth be told, she thought about turning around and walking back out, praying Jade never saw her. But that would mean hiding out there until Jade left. And what if she walked out and found Santana right there, crouched behind a pillar. That would be an even bigger wound to her ego.
"Good morning Santana." The receptionist called cheerfully. Santana fought back a grimace as Jade turned around and looked right at her.
"Hi Lauren." Santana said, putting on a pleasant smile.
"You're in late today."
"So you have been in then." Jade said, crossing her arms. "Thought you might have quit."
"Nope." Santana walked forward awkwardly. "I spend all my time in the studio."
Jade pursed her lips, nodding slowly.
"Right. I reckon you work yourself into a right state without me there fussing over you."
"Jade." Santana sighed.
"Nah it's all good mate." Jade backed away from the receptionist's counter, her hands up. "You clearly found a better way to do it, don't let me stop you. I'm just an accompaniment right?"
"Jade I was in a poopy place when I said all that."
"A what?" Jade grimaced. "What did you just say."
"Urgh." Santana rolled her eyes. "It's a long story. Look I'm trying to-"
"Forget it." Jade backed up more. "I don't want to hear it."
She turned and walked down the hallway, stopping to punch angrily at the button for the elevators.
"Fish sticks!" Santana muttered. The receptionist giggled.
"What are you laughing about Lauren?" Santana glared playfully at her.
"Let me guess. Your kids started swearing?"
Santana tapped her nose.
"I get it." Lauren laughed. "Which one?"
"Take a wild guess." Santana smirked.
"Hahaha. Mateo?" Santana nodded. "He's taking after you huh?"
"You know." Santana said, as her phone rang in her bag. "I'm starting to think that when people say that they don't mean it is a compliment." She fished her phone out of her purse. Malek was calling. "Duty calls."
"Enjoy." Lauren called after her as she walked to the elevators Jade had already disappeared in.
They tried working for three hours before they both had to admit that something just wasn't right today. They spent two more hours refining the songs they had already written, bringing the total number of songs ready for recording up to eight, and then Malek called it a night.
"I'm sure you'll be happy to be home in time to do homework with you kids today." Malek said as he packed his things.
"Actually, my kids aren't home."
"Oh are they with Quinn?"
"Nope."
"Puck?"
"No." Santana laughed. "Did you forget I'm married?"
"Oh" Malek chuckled. "I don't know I just assumed she'd be at home."
"Nope. Brittany's gone too. Took them to Nashville with her."
"Fun. So you have a night off."
"Basically." Santana spun her chair around. "I don't what I'm going to do with it."
"What no friends? A celebrity like you?"
"Life at the top is lonely." Santana lamented playfully. "Noah is out on a date, again, with this mystery woman he won't let us meet."
"Same woman?" Malek asked.
"Same damn one. So he says. I'm not sure I believe him."
Malek laughed.
"Mercedes' husband is around for the weekend so their out enjoying each other's company."
"Kinky."
"Noooooo" Santana groaned, covering her eyes. "Why would you make me think that."
"Isn't that what you mean?"
"No! They're with their son."
"Oh, okay. My bad."
"Jeez."
"And Jade's not talking to me so…"
"Those are your only friends? I repeat, a celebrity like you?"
Santana flipped him the middle finger.
"Who needs friends when you're married to your best friend?"
"So you're not bored alone on your nights off."
"Maybe I'll go help Quinn obsess over her wedding dress."
"I have a better idea." He waited for Santana to stop spinning and look at him. "Let's blow off some steam."
Santana grinned, sitting upright. "I like the sound of that."
Santana couldn't remember the last time she'd been this drunk. It was probably around the time she'd been signed, when she'd gone out to celebrate with Puck, Quinn and Brittany, because even on her wedding night she had not been this hammered. The room would swim if she stood up too fast, or sat down too fast, or turned her head too fast, which she was doing a lot because of dance moves she was trying to remember.
"If you danced like this it's no wonder you won." Malek said from the couch in front of her, raising his glass to cheers and then downing the shot.
"Of course." Santana slurred, trying to roll her hips. "I'm hot."
"Yeah you are."
"I should have been the lead female soloist." She said angrily, twirling around. She giggled as the room continued to spin even as she stopped. The dizziness had her toppling onto the floor.
Malek burst out laughing.
"I mean, look at me. Look at me!"
"I'm looking!"
"I'm hot." She rubbed her throat. "And I can sing."
"Fuck yeah you can sing."
"Don't curse." She pointed at Malek.
"Sorry."
"But fuck yeah, I can sing." Malek giggled. "And sure, Berry could carry a tune…I mean." Santana closed her eyes, swallowing thickly. "Okay she could bring the goddamn house down like no one else, and it was really freaking annoying."
"Nobody likes a show off." Malek shook his head.
"And she had the worst personality. Like the worst." She threw her arms out, her eyes still closed.
"So why was she the lead?"
"Cause she could sing." Santana shook her head, feeling her hair drag against the carpet. "She could really sing….better than me even…" her voice cracked. "I mean she had a huge nose, and she was freakishly short and dressed like a deranged toddler, but she could sing better than me."
And then the tears began to fall down her face.
"She….she was so annoying, and she was so ugly, and everyone hated her, but we needed her cause of her friggin voice."
She was sobbing now.
"If she was singing this album your work would be so much easier. Nobody would care that she'd been gone for five and a half years, they'd just buy the album cause her voice is so amazing!"
"Okay" Malek slid down from the couch, crawling to Santana. "Why are you crying?"
"I don't know!" Santana wailed.
"Okay shhhh, come here." He lay down beside her, pulling her into him and hugging her. "Santana your voice is amazing. You have fans all over the world who are dying for you to come back. And trust me, they do not want to listen to Berry…awful personality whoever…sing. They want to hear you."
Santana sniffed, her sobs calming down.
"They want to hear the soulful, raspy, sound of the woman they fell in love with in a mall. They want to be transported by your raw emotion and your powerful lyrics and you fiery attitude."
Santana smiled, taking a shuddering breath.
"They want you."
She turned over to face Malek.
"Really."
"Promise." He said seriously.
"How do you know?"
"Because no one wants to go to a concert and watch a deranged toddler midget, no matter how good their voice is."
Santana snorted with laughter, finally catching her breath.
"Thanks."
The door opened just then, but Santana was suddenly feeling too drained to move. Her previous energy having vanished with her tears.
"Lopierce?"
"Noah?" She mustered the energy to lift her head. Seconds later Puck appeared standing above her in the space between the living room and kitchen. "Noah!" She cheered.
"What the fuck are you doing?" He rushed down the stairs.
"Don't curse."
"Santana what the fuck?"
"Don't curse!"
"Nobody is fucking here. Are you drunk?"
"Maybe?" She giggled. "Probably a lot."
"Okay." He sighed. "I'll be with you in a second okay. Just lie there."
Santana nodded happily, dropping her head back down and closing her eyes.
"Time to go dude." Puck said to Malek.
"I don't think-Hey I'm not done."
"You are. I don't know what the hell you gave her or how you managed to convince her to bring you back here but you better believe you're done."
"He get you hands off me."
Santana opened her eyes, sluggishly, to find Puck frog-marching Malek up the stairs.
"What are you doing, you can't kick me out!"
"The fuck I can't!" Puck shoved him hard, nearly making him fall.
Santana sat up, the situation finally catching up to her.
"Noah!" She called loudly. "That's Malek."
Puck stopped, looking Malek over.
"You're not so great." He scoffed. Santana shook her head, trying to muster the energy and co-ordination necessary to stand. Puck had not been amused by Jesus' infatuation with Malek. At all. "All the more reason for you to leave."
"Hey man." Malek seemed to have sobbered slightly. He was able to pull his arm out of Puck's grip. "I don't know what your problem is, but I don't take orders from you."
"Santana's drunk, it's late, and I need to get her to bed. There's nothing left for you to do here, so go home."
"I'll go when Santana tells me to."
Puck surged forward, grabbing Malek by the collar of his shirt and bringing their faces close as he snarled. "Listen you-"
"Puckerman." Santana finally managed to stand up. "I'm good. Let me handle it."
Scowling, Puck let go of Malek.
"Just so you know…" he seethed. "This isn't your turf. Next time, stay in your lane." Then he turned to Santana. "I'm gonna go get you something to drink."
"Thanks."
Santana gingerly walked up the steps, stopping next to Malek.
"I'll walk you out."
"You sure." Malek chuckled.
"Shut up."
"Hey don't curse." Malek hit her arm.
She walked him to the door, waited for him to put on his shoes and jacket and opened the door.
"Thanks for a fun time." She said. "I don't think I knew how much I needed that."
"Work hard, play hard." Malek said, smiling. "It's he only way survive."
"I'll keep that in mind." She glanced behind her. "Sorry about Noah. He's protective."
"Does he have a thing for you or something?"
Santana snorted. "Don't make me laugh. No. We're family."
"Oh." Malek nodded. "Okay well. See you Monday?"
"As always."
Malek pulled her into a hug.
"Thanks for a fun night too." He said in a voice quitter than he'd previously been using. "I didn't know how much I needed it either."
Santana patted his back and pulled away.
"Drive safe huh?"
"Yeah." He nodded. "Five miles an hour for me."
"Good."
Santana waited for him to get into his car before walking back into the house. Puck was waiting for her at the kitchen island.
"I don't like him."
"Oh spare me." She snatched the glass of water he'd filled for her and chugged it.
"No I'm serious Santana. Something's off about that guy."
"Whatever. Why are you here?" She sat on one of the chairs and held the glass out for him. He took it and filled it again.
"I came to talk to you about Jade."
Santana frowned. "What about her?"
"Well….rumour has it you two aren't talking."
"What rumours?" Santana drained the glass again. "Do you think you could make me something to eat?"
"You're lucky I'm in a good mood."
"Oh did someone get laid?" She wagged her eyebrows.
"Maybe. Stop talking about it and I'll cook."
Santana zipped her lips.
"What do you want to eat."
"Pasta."
"Coming up."
"Where did you hear that Jade and I aren't talking."
"We're friends you know?"
"Oh yes, you babysit my kids together." Santana remembered. "When did that start happening?"
"We've been around each other long enough."
Santana bobbed her head, conceding the point. That's what she'd concluded anyway.
"Well if she told you then you know why?"
"Classic Lopez defense mode." Puck nodded. "I know it well. That scathing tongue of yours is gonna land you in real trouble one day."
"Whatever." Santana ran her finger along the rim of her glass, feeling guilty. "I tried to apologise."
"When?"
"Oh she didn't tell you that?" She raised her eyebrows.
"Well you're shit-"
"Hey!"
"Sorry." Puck said quickly. "You're bad at apologies, so are you sure she even knew that's what you were doing?"
Santana shrugged, watching Puck put water to boil.
"Try again."
"What do you care?"
"I've started to realise the importance of our friendships. We're getting old you know? We don't exactly have the luxury of making new friends. This is kind of it."
"It's too early for a mid-life crisis Noah."
"Shut up." Puck chuckled. "Just apologise again okay? I know you gotta feel bad."
Santana sighed. "Yeah."
"There we go. So make it right."
"Alright. I'll try again. But since you're such buddies with her now, can you tell her to actually hear me out."
Puck smirked as he retrieved a pack of pasta. "Already done chica."