Disclaimer: I don't own HP, I only own Evan and Iris Potter.
AN: I hope everyone's liking Evan, and that he's realistic. I know everyone wants him to drop Ron, but it's not that easy for him, even knowing that Ron is in the wrong. After Aimee's 'death' Lily and James took Evan and Iris into seclusion and so he's very uncertain about how to be friends with people. Like how in canon Harry clung to Ron and altered his behaviour to make Ron happy, Evan is acting the same way because he's very loyal and doesn't want to lose his first friend and he isn't speaking up against him because he doesn't really know how. He's also very uncertain about how to deal with people in general, and fears living up to their expectations for the Boy-Who-Lived.
He and Iris also have an idealised vision of what their sister would be like, so that's why he's also mentioning how smart she was, how much better at dealing with things she would be, etc, even though he doesn't remember her very well. He's never really dealt with her death properly either, as he blames himself and his parents basically dealt with everything by ignoring it.
I want to reiterate that this is NOT A POTTER!BASHING STORY! Lily and James were/are good-intentioned, but they made a lot of mistakes because they were young and overwhelmed and got caught up in the attention, as well as having one very sick child and two excitable toddlers (Evan and Iris).
Published 24-April-2024
Updated 10-Feb-2024
Entry 5:
21st December 1991
Dear Aimee,
Happy Yule! We got home on the 19th, and Mum and Dad picked me up from King's Cross. They left Iris at home with Timmie, which was disappointing. I was really excited to see her and introduce her to my friends. Iris and I are so close, especially since you, went away. It was only the two of us against the world so we had to be, I guess.
Anyway, I've got to admit that it's good to be home. I've missed Potter Manor. Hogwarts is amazing, but it's like what they said in that movie that Mum took Iris and I to see once. There's no place like home.
Speaking of Mum, she's lost her mind! I've never seen her so giddy, jumping around and hugging me every few seconds, saying how much she's missed me. And don't forget that she's been asking me for every little detail about what's happening at Hogwarts. So far I've told her about literally everything from my classes, Quidditch, and my friends. They also wanted to know if Snape's been a problem, especially Dad. I asked about what Aludra said, about Snape resenting me because of Dad, and Dad admitted that they were in the same year at Hogwarts and didn't get along. I think that must be the most Dad's ever said about his time at school. Anyway, I told them that I could handle it. They seemed a bit wary but said if there was a problem I should tell them, and then let it be to continue asking me about school. You'd never guess I've been sending them weekly letters!
It's a bit weird though. Mum and Dad were both strangely interested in Aludra. They were asking me what is she like, who are her friends, what's her favourite class? They want to know everything about her! It's bizarre. Why are they so interested in her? Is it because of her family? Do they feel like Mrs. Weasley and suspect Aludra and her father practice the Dark Arts? But when I asked them that Mum and Dad waved the suggestion off. Actually, to be more specific, Dad burst out laughing and said that Snape would wash his hair before Sirius Black ever used the Dark Arts. Then he got really sad and locked himself in his office to brood. That was weird too. Usually it's Mum who locks herself away to cry in your old bedroom.
I just don't get it.
Anyway, Yule was much the same as every year. Iris and I woke up early (she slept in my room with me) and heard Mum and Dad in your room. Mum was crying and Dad was trying to comfort her, like usual on the holidays, our birthday and the day you, went away. Iris and I went downstairs, because it's best not to disturb them when they're in your room. Timmie had made us pancakes with blueberries cooked into them, drizzled with maple syrup, my favourite. Well, I had them with maple syrup. Iris went with chocolate spread instead. We were just starting our second portions when Mum and Dad came downstairs and joined us. You'd never guess from the way they were laughing and chatting that they were just grieving their eldest daughter's death, but then Mum and Dad have a lot of practice at putting on a 'everything is fine' look for Iris and I. Iris asked if they'd decided whether or not we were going to the Ministry Ball this evening and Dad said no, it wasn't safe. We'll wait until Iris has at least one year of Hogwarts under her belt so she can at least stun and run if necessary. Though if her professor is Quirrell, or anything like him, she'll need to do a lot of self-study to manage that. Then again, Iris is a lot smarter than me, so she'll probably be fine.
Anyway, back to the Ball. A part of me is relieved, because the Ball sounds horrifying, all those properly raised Heirs making alliances and networking. Basically, everything I'm not good at. I know that if I want to be a good Lord Potter I'll need to do it someday , but every time the subject comes up Mum and Dad say that day can wait. I wish they would give me more training. Aludra's been managing one of her family's estates and a vault for over a year now! Neville and Susan are both managing vaults already, and they're going to each get an estate to run under supervision next summer! I don't even know how many properties we have! Every time I've asked about being trained, either in politics, estate management (boring as it sounds) or duelling Mum and Dad have said I'm too young, but every other Heir I know has been learning this stuff for years, and actively engaging in it at least since starting Hogwarts! If they don't teach me something, I'm going to run my inheritance to the ground! Maybe Dad doesn't trust me. I amn't exactly a golden child, after all. Not like you were.
You'd be so much better at it than I am. I bet you'd have a ton of friends in Hogwarts. You were always so charming and sweet and clever. You would have rebuilt Wixen Britain.
Anyway, even with that relief, I felt bad too. Iris is desperate to meet more people and make some friends, but because of the danger to the 'Boy-Who-Lived' she's never gotten the chance. I hate that she suffers because of what happened to me. To us. I know there's nothing that can change it, but I wish I could.
We did presents in our pjs next. Iris was really pleased with the new camera I got her, and Mum was really excited about the book on rare charms I gave her (Aludra is right, Obscurus Books is so much better than Flourish and Blotts). She said she's been trying to get a copy for ages, and now she doesn't have to rely on borrowing Professor Flitwick's anymore. Dad seemed happy at the idea of the two of us going to a muggle football game in the summer and because it's muggle it's not a security risk, so thank you Dean for the suggestion!
As for me, I got a good haul this year. Iris gave me a full set of Gryffindor Quidditch robes with runes to repel water and dirt and keep me from getting too hot or too cold, and dragon hide boots to go with them. Mum and Dad gave me a full set of Quidditch balls to play pick-up games with. Mum even said we could invite my friends over during the summer, or I might even be allowed to spend the summer at one of their houses if it's warded enough! I bet Aludra and Susan's homes are safe enough. Aludra's father is Lord Black, and the Black wards are legendary, and Susan is the niece and ward of the Head of the DMLE. I bet their homes are warded to the wandhilt. Aludra gave me a copy of Jinxes for the Jinxed and I had to hide it before Mum and Dad see. They'd definitely confiscate it, at least Mum would.
It doesn't matter that I'm the Boy-Who-Lived and need to know how to defend myself, they still think of me as a little kid. I gotta admit though, what I'd really love is to try the spells out on Malfoy. He deserves it for being such a prejudiced git. Yeah, I'm definitely going to try out some of these spells on him.
Anyway, Neville gave me a year's subscription to 'Quidditch Quarterly' and Susan gave me a broomstick servicing kit. Ron's mum sent some homemade fudge and a sweater that, while good-intentioned, is made from Shetland wool, which I am, of course, heavily allergic too. Not to mention it's one of the coarsest and itchiest types of wool available, though it is cheap and durable. Mum said not to mention any of that when I send a thank you note, though.
All in all, it was a good year. After opening our presents we got dressed and went to the cinema to see a new movie, like tradition. We saw the newest Star Trek. It was good. I wish I was Captain Kirk, exploring the universe and confident in the loyalty of the people around him. Confident in himself. I wish I had confidence in myself, but I'm not, Aimee. Everyone has all these expectations for me, but I don't think I live up to them. I don't think I ever can.
Anyway, we went home after the movie and had a snowball fight, Mum and I versus Dad and Iris. Dad and Iris won, and we made a snow family before having hot chocolate while Dad read 'A Tale of Three Brothers' to us. Mum's always hated that story, she thinks it's too grim for children, but Dad insists it's important for Iris and I to know it. He's never explained why, though. It's just a kid's story, after all. It was time for bed after that.
Oh, I can hear Iris getting out of bed. She probably wants to come into bed with me and chat the way we used to before I went to Hogwarts. I'd better go.
I wish you were here.
All my love,
Evan
Entry 6:
4th January 1992
Dear Aimee,
Wow, so apparently there are issues between us and the Blacks.
Apparently, Sirius Black was Dad's best friend when they were younger. He ran away from home during Hogwarts and came to live with Dad and our grandparents! He was even named our godfather. I almost remember him, I think, when I try to. I can remember a man with long black hair in a dragonhide jacket playing Exploding Snap with you and chasing me while I flew on my kid's broom. There was another man with sandy hair and scars who I remember reading us a story. That must have been Aludra's Uncle Remus.
I guess that explains why Dad acted weird when he mentioned Lord Black at Yule.
Anyway, apparently Lord Black and Dad had this big argument around the time that Aludra was adopted and haven't spoken to each other since. Mr. Lupin took Lord Black's side, so that makes me suspect that it might have been Dad's fault. Otherwise Mr. Lupin would have chosen Dad's side, right?
I wrote to Dad asking what happened but he just said we'd talk about it when I get home. I know our parents, I know when they're putting something off to give themselves time to think of an excuse. They're probably hoping I'll forget about it. What could be so horrible that you stop talking to your best friends? Why don't they want to tell me the truth?
The thing that really bothers me, though, is the timing of it. I found out that Aludra was adopted shortly after you-went away.
Do you think the argument had something to do with what happened to you?
I bet you'd have some idea of what happened. You were always clever, and nobody ever noticed you eavesdropping, because you were so small and quiet.
I wish you were here to give me advice.
All my love,
Evan
Entry 7:
12th February 1992
Dear Aimee,
I don't know what to do. Ron screwed up, and now everyone hates him, and me by default.
Oliver told us that Snape is refereeing the upcoming match against Hufflepuff, and Ron was completely panicked. He's convinced that Snape is the one who attacked me at the last match. I thought so too at first, but after hearing Aludra, Susan and Neville lay out the different reasons why Quirrell is a more likely suspect, I have to say that I'm torn. On one hand, Snape despises me passionately.
On the other, I agree that he's smart and cunning, and a blatant attack like the one at the Quidditch game isn't very smart, especially with the Senior Auror of the Dark Wixen team right there in the same box. Plus, Aludra's right that Snape's reliant on Dumbledore's good word to keep him out of Azkaban. He'd be risking a lot for very little.
Anyway, after we told Ron and the others the news, he and Aludra got into an-well, it can't really be called an argument what with the way it played out (basically, Ron lashed out in a really nasty way at Aludra for no reason, until she stormed out.). Percy went after her, seeing as it was almost curfew, while everyone else except me turned on Ron and gave out to him. Fred and George looked especially upset with him. Word had spread to all the other Houses by breakfast, and everyone was glaring at us.
I know Ron was in the wrong to say what he said, but he's still my first real friend, and I know what it's like to be on your own. I don't want to abandon him, but it's only been two days and I already really miss Aludra, Neville and Susan. Ron may be my first friend, but I don't really have a lot in common with him beyond Quidditch, and even then we support different teams. I have a lot more in common with the others. Plus, it's hard to eat or study or do anything really, what with everyone making snide comments and sneering at us. Even McGonagall seems angry with us. Actually, why am I saying even McGonagall? She's Aludra's grandma, of course she's angry with us for making her granddaughter cry.
I really screwed up, didn't I? I've been trying to make Ron apologize, but every time I bring the topic up he just goes on a rant about how Aludra thinks she's better than everyone else because she's a Black (he seems very determined to ignore that his grandmother is a Black and so is his great-aunt), that she's a Dark Witch and a Slytherin spy, that she keeps rubbing her riches in everyone's faces (none of which is true, I might add).
He won't acknowledge that she helps everyone who asks for it with their homework, that she's not haughty, just a noble raised to act according to her station, that she's kind and has forgiven him a thousand times over the last few months. Truthfully, I wouldn't be half-so patient and forgiving in her position.
Maybe it's better this way. Aludra looks happier away from us anyway.
Still, I feel like she deserves an apology from Ron whether we're friends or not. But on the other hand, I'm afraid to keep pushing Ron and lose him too. I don't want to be all alone. Is that very selfish of me? I bet you'd know what to do.
I wish you were here.
All my love,
Evan