A/N: Couple things real fast: This chapter takes place almost exclusively inside of Bellatrix' mind. There's only a tiny bit of interaction with the real world. So don't get confused when you see "Bella" talking to "Bellatrix"…Bella represents the light, whilst Bellatrix represents the Bellatrix we all know and love from canon. Second, there are a couple scenes of brutal fighting. Nothing graphic, just briefly intense. Also, torture, because the incident with Neville's parents is shown.

Bella's Ascent From Madness

"Cathedral tall, cathedral wide, grace provides a place to hide;
Hour of evil, hour of sin, open up the gates and let me in!
Hour of anger, pray to die;
Ours is anguish, there is no sky…"

Bellatrix Lestrange was a hollow, empty husk of a human, and quite insane. All reason, all love, empathy, compassion had been emptied from her long years ago. The only things that were left was hatred, rage, and darkness. All she could focus on was that thing she hated and feared more than anything else: the Dark Lord. She hated him. She said she loved him. She said he would come for her, when those blood traitors and mudbloods had put her on trial, she yelled it, screamed it. But in what was left of her heart she knew he never would.

So all she did was rant and rave and scream in anger and madness and agony. That was all she could do: lash out in blind, raving hatred at the world for what she thought it had done to her.

However, deep inside Bellatrix Lestrange…far inside, hidden in the very depths of her soul, there was a door. Behind the door was a room, a beautiful room. The sunlight spilled in through the picture window, birds and bees made noise among the flowers and trees outside. Inside the room was a four poster bed, a dresser, a small table beside the bed upon which stood pictures of various people. And also inside the room, there lived Bellatrix Black.

She had retreated to this room the day her father had given her in a marriage contract to Rudolphus Lestrange. That was the day she had told her boyfriend, William Greengrass, that she could no longer see him. The thought of never seeing William again, and the thought of marrying Lestrange, had caused her mind, her will, to flee into this room. Because her mind could not handle those thoughts, and her will could not stop the encroaching darkness that began to pursue her that day, and grew stronger every day after until it completely engulfed her mind.

Often in the early days, Bellatrix would come down and stand outside the door, taunting Bella about how weak and pathetic she was. They would argue. And it would always end with Bella sobbing and Bellatrix cackling. But Bellatrix had never tried to enter the room, much to Bella's relief. And it had been a long time now since Bellatrix had come down to taunt her.

So Bellatrix Black remained inside this little room. Safely tucked away in the one place where no darkness could ever enter. Here where there was always sunlight, always the memory of happiness. She would read, and look out the window, and talk to the pictures beside her bed: pictures of her little sisters, pictures of William, and pictures of her friends from Hogwarts. And never did she venture beyond the door, into the twisting hallways of madness that lay Outside.

Oh, she had some dim awareness of things going on Outside. She could always here Bellatrix Lestrange ranting and raving somewhere far away. Sometimes other voices would mumble or yell. Often Bellatrix would laugh that cackling, maniacal laugh of hers. She knew Bellatrix Lestrange had done some horrible things. And the guilt would overwhelm her for a moment as she realized that she had let Bellatrix do those things. Because Bella was weak…a coward. But then she would shake off the guilt. It wasn't her fault, after all. Bellatrix was too strong. How could Bella have any hope of stopping her?

She remembered hearing voices yelling "Guilty! Life in Azkaban!" And Bellatrix screaming about the Dark Lord. Then nothing but Bellatrix. Whisperings and mutterings. And time and again, screams from somewhere beyond Bellatrix would reach her ears. It frightened Bella, the other screaming, so she did her best to take no notice of it. Often she would sing in an attempt to drown out the cursing and yelling.

Just one time since the day she withdrew into her room did Bella venture out into the darkness beyond the door. Normally, she could ignore what Bellatrix was doing. But something once happened that had driven Bella to confront Bellatrix directly. It was years ago, but she still remembered it. It was the only thing that had happened since she retreated to this room that she had interacted with Outside, and it made her happy…the only happy memory she had had since before the darkness descended

She had heard the usual cackle of Bellatrix, and the yelling of the Lestrange brothers. Then she heard other voices. Another man's voice that seemed somehow familiar. It took Bella a few minutes but she finally realized who it was: Frank Longbottom, a classmate from Hogwarts. He was a pureblood like the Blacks were. Even though he had been in Gryffindor, Bella didn't have anything against him. Besides, he was William's friend, and that made him at least tolerable.

Because of what had happened to her, Bella had no idea what Frank went on to after Hogwarts. Nevertheless, one night she had heard yelling, many voices overlapping which made it difficult for her to tell what was going on. But she had recognized Frank's voice amidst the chaos. He was pleading…something about he "didn't know where", and to let his wife go.

Wife? So at least he had gotten married. Bella was glad. Good for him. Everyone should have true love, if they're lucky enough to find it. Not like her. She'd been denied true love and forced to turn her back on it. She had a fleeting thought back to Andromeda. Her little sister had been forced to chose between her family and love. Bella had always thought Andi had made the right choice, even though she'd never tell her parents or Cissy that.

Then Bella heard an angry female voice that she knew wasn't Bellatrix…it sounded familiar. Bella struggled to put a name with it. Alicia? Alison? Alice? Yes, Alice somebody or other. She couldn't remember. She heard Lestrange bellowing something followed by a woman—the Alice woman, Bella thought—screaming, then Frank yelling in rage. Something was happening to Frank Longbottom's love. Love was the only thing that mattered to Bella, and she couldn't take any more. Driven by some urge she didn't understand, she yanked the door to her sanctuary open and darted out into the dark corridors that lay beyond.

Finding her way to the top of a long staircase, she found Bellatrix staring at a writhing Frank and Alice Longbottom, being crucioed by the Lestrange brothers. Bellatrix had a gleeful grin on her face. The Lestranges stopped and gave the Longbottoms a moment to catch their breath. "Now, itty bitty Longbottoms," Bellatrix said in a horrible, mocking tone of voice, "Tell us where the Dark Lord's gone? Tell us, and I promise we won't kill you with too much pain." She cackled and the three men laughed.

"I told you, he's dead!" Frank Longbottom spat at her.

Bellatrix gave a nonchalant shrug of her shoulders. "Have it your way, then." She took out her wand, raised it and yelled, "Cru—"

"NO!" Bella shrieked, leaping onto Bellatrix. They fell over and started tussling on the ground. "Those are Will's friends! You can't hurt them!"

"YOU!?" Bellatrix shrieked. "I thought you were dead, you pathetic weakling! And what of your precious Will? He left us, didn't he? He walked away and betrayed us! It's his fault we became a Lestrange!"

Ignoring the stab of pain that slammed into her heart from what Bellatrix said, Bella managed to get her hands around Bellatrix' neck and pounded her head against the floor a few times as she yelled, "I won't let you hurt them!" through gritted teeth while Bellatrix tried to gouge Bella's eyes out.

To the Lestranges, Longbottoms, and Barty Crouch, it just looked like Bellatrix had frozen. Her face was alternating expressions from confused, to blank, to frustrated, and horrified. Her lips were moving but no sound was coming out. Her eyes were vacant and staring straight ahead of her, her wand arm hanging listless at her side.

"Bellatrix, what is wrong with you?" Rudolphus bellowed. But Bellatrix didn't answer him, her face still alternating between different expressions.

"Fine, he muttered. "I'll do it myself, then! CRUCIO!" His brother and Barty joined in as well, and the Longbottoms screamed.

Still struggling with Bellatrix, Bella gradually became aware of the Longbottoms' screams. She rolled Bellatrix over—who had somehow gotten on top of her—and exchanged places so that she was now sitting atop Bellatrix. She held Bellatrix' left arm down with her foot while grabbing a hold of her wand arm with both hands. She pried the wand from Bellatrix', who was still struggling viciously, and screaming profanities the entire time. Slowly, Bella raised her arm and pointed her wand at Rudolphus. Her eyes were no longer blank, but burning with hate for the man before her.

The screams of the Longbottoms were starting to die down, and that concerned Bella. Still being tortured by the other three Deatheaters, Bella finally had the wand pointed at Rudolphus. She muttered, "Crucio!" Rudolphus screamed and dropped his wand, falling to his knees and then to the ground. Bella managed a quick glance at the Longbottoms. They were both twitching on the floor. Frank had a vacant expression on his face, while his wife's eyes were closed.

Rabastan and Barty gaped at the site of Rudolphus screaming in agony before turning their wands on Bella, who continued sending waves of searing torture into Rudolphus. It was as if all the years of pent up loneliness and frustration were pouring out of her at the man now writhing on the floor in front of her, and she screamed in rage, gleefully inflicting pain on this vile man.

But before the other two men could attack Bella, there were several pops, and at least half a dozen Aurors appeared, wands at the ready. The four Deatheaters were quickly overpowered. Bella was still glaring at Rudolphus as he was hauled to his feet by a couple of the Aurors. "I hope you rot in hell, you monster!" She shrieked.

That was enough of a distraction for Bellatrix to throw Bella off her. Landing in a heap, Bella picked herself up and ran back down the stairs into the darkness, as Bellatrix became aware that she was being dragged away by Aurors and began screaming about the Dark Lord returning and saving them. She really had a one track mind.

When she finally made it back to her sunny little room, Bella slammed the door shut and leaned her back against it. Tired and miserable, she slid down the door. Burying her face in her hands, she began to sob.

(XXX)

After that incident, Bella didn't leave her room again. She realized over time that Bellatrix had been sent to Azakaban. And she was fine with that. At least Bellatrix would never harm anyone again. And so the years passed.

But then, after an unknown time spent enjoying the peace of her little room deep inside Bellatrix' soul, Bella began to once more develop an awareness of something happening Outside. She became conscious of a presence, a prescience that was not Bellatrix. At first, she couldn't make out what, or who, it was. But over time she did begin to realize, although at first she wouldn't allow herself to believe it.

It was a voice, calling to her. To her, and not to Bellatrix. And it was the sweetest voice she had ever heard. It was William's voice. Her William. No, not her William. She frowned as she tried to remember. What was it Andi had told her in one of her last letters? Something about Will getting married. It had crushed Bella, though she tried to be happy for Will. He deserved happiness, and Bella certainly could not give it to him.

But, no! That was definitely Will's voice on the other side of the door. He was calling her, telling her to come to him. And she heard Bellatrix screaming rage as well, trying to drown out Will's beautiful voice. Several times Bella stood and walked to the door. More than once, she reached for the doorknob. But each time, she sighed and returned to her seat by the window. Unlike Will, she didn't deserve happiness. She had been a coward, hiding in her safe little room whilst Bellatrix committed acts of unspeakable evil. Bella could have stopped her, like she did with the Longbottoms. She should have stopped her. But she didn't, because she was weak and afraid.

After a long time of hearing Will calling to her, she couldn't bear it any more. She stood and ran to the door. And yet, once more she hesitated. Should she? Should she go out there and try to find Will? And was that really Will? Bellatrix had grown quieter, but Bella could still sense her lurking somewhere Outside. Bella's hand shook as she lifted it to the doorknob. She wanted with all her heart to go to the voice. It sounded so serene, so full of love. Love for her, even while Bellatrix had screamed and raved and yelled obscenities at the man.

Without warning, a voice sspoke from behind her. "You'll never know unless you open the door, dear girl."

Bella gasped and spun around. Behind her stood a woman, smiling at her. Her face was kind, beautiful, strong and ageless. She wore a long sleeved, shimmery green dress that reached to her ankles. Her feet were bare. The woman's wavy brown hair fell almost to her waist, and her head was crowned with water lilies woven together into a circle.

"W-who are you?" She asked in a timid voice. She was not used to talking to others. Besides those brief and long ago exchanges with Bellatrix in the early days of her retreat, Bella had not spoken with anyone, other than the birds and insects outside the window and the pictures on her nightstand.

The smile on the strange woman's face grew. "My name is not important at the moment, dear Bella. All that matters is I have come to guide you back to the light. Back to your William."

"But…Andi told me that William had gotten married. How can he be mine?" She was surprised at how sad that made her feel. "And why would he want me, after everything I've done?"

The woman approached her and placed a hand on Bella's shoulder. "As I said, you'll never know unless you open that door and step out of this room. All I can tell you is what I once told him: Love is the strongest of all the magics."

The two women stared at one another for a few moments. "I'm afraid," Bella whispered.

"I know you are, dear heart. But I cannot open the door for you. You must do it yourself." She turned Bella around gently so that she was facing the door. Again William's voice called out to her. Bella reached for the knob and turned it. With one last glance back into the pretty little room that had been her refuge for so long, she opened the door, and stepped into the dark corridor. She felt the strange woman's presence behind her, and it gave her courage.

Once they had left the room, the woman moved in front of Bella. Taking her hand with an encouraging smile, she led Bella through the maze of corridors. A soft light came from the woman, dispelling the darkness and illuminating the corridors around them.

Through the dark, twisting hallway the two women moved, William's voice calling to her all the time. Once again reaching the long staircase, Bella and the woman started up. It felt to Bella as if the climb would never end, but at last they reached the top. A final long but straight passageway was in front of them. And at the end Bella could see a tiny point of light. William's voice grew louder and closer.

Bella turned to the woman. "Is that…?" She couldn't bring herself to ask the question.

The woman smiled. "Yes, my dear—that is the light, the way out of your darkness."

Bella turned back around. It was so close now. So close! After all this time, was escape possible? Will's voice called out again: "Bella, please!" He pleaded. "Wake up! Come back to me, Bella!" His voice sounded so desperate.

Unable to resist any longer, Bella took off running down the corridor, the spot of light growing with every step. At last she saw a door ahead of her, and around the door bright light was streaming. However, as she neared the door, Bella skidded to a halt, the fear surging through her again. Between her and the door stood Bellatrix Lestrange.

The woman had a maniacal grin on her face, and she stood in a defensive posture, right in front of the door. Her face morphed into a mocking pout when she saw the look of fear on Bella's face. "Awww, what's wrong? Is the wittle baby scared of da big baaaad Bellatrix?" She cackled. "You always were a pathetic coward! You ran from father, you ran from Will, you ran from Lestrange, you ran from me! And now you want out, is that it? HA! Well, little baby Bella, all you have to do…is get past me!"

Bella staggered back a step or two, and Bellatrix laughed. Bella felt a hand on her shoulder. Glancing back, she saw the strange woman smiling at her. "You can do it, dear one. She is the last thing that stands between you and freedom, between you and William. You mustn't let your fear control you any longer."

Bella turned back around. Bellatrix was still grinning madly at her. Bella glared at Bellatrix. "Let me out," she growled.

Bellatrix cackled again. "Never!"

"Come on, Bella! Please wake up!" William's voice sounded once more.

"Wake up, Bella! Wake up, Bella!" Bellatrix mocked in a sing-song voice.

With a scream of rage, Bella charged at Bellatrix, the two falling to the ground and repeating their struggle of many years earlier. Only this time, Bella was driven by a determination that would not be stifled. The two struggled and fought for what seemed like hours, but perhaps it was days. And all the while, William called to her from behind the door, giving her strength.

At last, Bella managed to gain the advantage. She had her hands around Bellatrix' throat, squeezing as hard as she could. She slammed Bellatrix' face against the wall several times, until at last, with one final exhale of breath, Bellatrix Lestrange was dead. Her body slid to the floor, disintegrating into what looked like ash. Bella slumped to the floor as well, breathing hard. The unknown woman knelt beside her and took her in her arms.

"You did it, dear girl. You beat her. You proved that the light is indeed stronger than the dark." She helped Bella to her feet and hugged her. "Now go, open the door. I promise you that William is on the other side, waiting for you."

Bella turned and reached for the door. Stopping once more, she looked over her shoulder at the strange woman who had helped give her the strength to break free of Bellatrix. "Thank you, whoever you are." She said with a smile.

The woman returned her smile. "You are quite welcome, my dear. And don't worry, you'll see me again." She waved towards the door.

Turning back around, Bella took a deep breath and closed her eyes. Pushing the door open, she stepped out…

Bright light assailed her eyes, so bright that even with her eyes squeezed shut the light hurt them. It felt like she was lying on a soft bed while someone held her in their arms. She stirred and stretched against whoever it was.

"Bella?" A voice whispered. "Bella?"

Slowly she opened her eyes, still having to blink against the light. As her eyes adjusted, she realized it wasn't all that bright in the room. There were just two candles lit, one at each side of the bed she was lying on. But that didn't matter to her at all. What did matter was the face looking down at her, eyes full of worry and love. A face she had seen every day during her stay in her little room. A face she never thought she would see again in real life. The face of William Greengrass, the only man she had ever, or would ever, love.

Bella raised a shaky hand and placed it on his cheek. Still squinting, she searched his eyes and saw only love and happiness. "Will? Will, is it really you?" Her voice was soft and hoarse.

A sob escaped Will's chest as he replied, "Yes, my love. Yes, it's me!" He pulled her gently against his chest as he sobbed with happiness. Bella's eyes fell shut once more as she rested her head against William's chest. Tears slid down her face as well, one from each eye, as her lips turned up in a peaceful smile.

For the first time in her entire life, Bellatrix Black Lestrange felt safe.

A/N: There you have it. Shorter than most of the chapters, but I wanted to keep this about Bellatrix' struggle to regain her sanity. Hope you all enjoyed this peak at Bella's inner turmoil. And it just goes to show you that there is some good inside even the most evil of people. Any questions/comment, leave a review or shoot me a PM.