Title: Like a Common Muggle
Team: Caerphilly Catapults
Position: Chaser 1
Round: QL Daily Prophet Expelliarmus Competition
Prompt: Scourgify– [action] someone finding out about household spells
Additional Prompts used: N/A
Word count: 965
Betas: Bea, Sky
A/N Some mild swearing and some innuendos
Draco arrived home from work, kicked off his shoes and dropped his cloak. He was exhausted and was looking forward to soaking in a nice bath.
"Harry? Where are you?"
"I'm in the bedroom," Harry's voice called from their bedroom.
"Oh, are you?" Draco smirked, strutting through to the bedroom, only to be disappointed. Harry was on his hands and knees but not in the way Draco had hoped for. He was scrubbing a tea stain out of the carpet, like a common Muggle! "What are you doing?"
"Cleaning," Harry said. "You know that boring household chore which those of us without House Elf's have to do."
"I know what cleaning is, Harry," Draco said, rolling his eyes at his fiancé. "I've lived with you for five years now. And in case it had escaped your notice, we've not had a House Elf for any of those five years."
Harry stopped scrubbing and sat back on his heels, glaring at Draco.
"Still a sarcastic little bugger, aren't you?"
"Listen Potter, you knew what you were getting with me. Also, I would like to point out that there's nothing little about me, I'm taller than you are shorty."
"I'll have you know that I'm perfectly proportioned and of average height," Harry said standing up and looking up at Draco. "It's not my fault that you and Ron are just overly tall and gangly."
"How dare you lump me into any category with Weasley," Draco said, in mock hurt tones. "He might be gangly. I'm…"
"Lanky? Skeletal? Spindle-shanked?"
"Spindle-shanked? What are we in the sixteenth century?"
"Okay, lanky then." Harry grinned at Draco.
"Oi, I'm warning you, Potter. Any more of that cheek," Draco growled, pulling Harry abruptly towards him and roughly grabbing his bottom, eliciting a yelp from Harry. "And, this won't be getting anything for a week."
Harry looked up at Draco with his big puppy dog eyes, which were glinting mischievously.
"Like you could really go that long without."
"Try me," Draco smirked, before pulling Harry in for a tender kiss. "Now, would you care to explain to me why you are on your hands and knees, cleaning like a common Muggle?"
"If you're going to ask and answer your own questions, what do you need me for?"
"What?"
"I was cleaning. What else am I supposed to say?"
Draco rolled his eyes.
"Harry, love, you have a wand."
"Yes, I do," Harry smirked, suggestively.
Draco glared at Harry, reached into Harry's pocket and extracted Harry's wand. "This wand. So why aren't you using it? Instead, you're on your hands and knees like a Muggle."
"How else does one clean?" Harry huffed.
"Are you seriously telling me that after five years of living together, you've never once used magic to clean?"
"Do you?" Harry asked, genuinely surprised.
"Oh, great Salazar, give me the strength to endure this idiot," Draco sighed. "You actually think that when I've done the cleaning, that I do it like a Muggle?"
Harry opened his mouth to answer and then quickly shut it again. Now that Draco said it like that it was obvious that of course Draco wouldn't clean like a Muggle. Not having a House-Elf was one thing but no way Draco would do it manually. Harry's brow knitted together in confusion.
"Well…but I…how do you do it with magic?"
"Have you really been cleaning the Muggle way for five years?" Draco asked kindly.
"Yes," Harry said, turning red.
"Oh, my love. You are utterly adorable." Draco kissed Harry's forehead, before pulling out his own wand. "Like this. Scourgify." Draco pointed his wand at the tea stain which vanished instantly and he watched as Harry's jaw dropped open. Draco started laughing.
"Don't laugh at me," Harry said, punching Draco's shoulder. "The Dursley's used to make me do all the cleaning and I couldn't use magic outside of school; so, it just never occurred to me there would be household cleaning spells. Stop laughing!" Harry said, annoyed, as Draco continued to laugh.
"I'm sorry, but I'm just imagining you cleaning the toilet instead of using scourgify. Is that why we have a mop?"
"Well, how else are you supposed to clean the floor?"
"Tergeo to syphon off dirt and grease and scourgify to clean it, or at least enchant the mop or a scrubbing brush. Same with the dishes and washing clothes; although I always use a freshening charm on the clothes too."
"Oh," Harry said, realisation dawned on him.
"There's a whole book on household cleaning charms on our bookshelf, Harry."
"Since when?"
"Since we moved in together five years ago and had no House-Elf," Draco deadpanned and Harry flushed red again. "You're too, freaking adorable and naïve."
Draco smiled and pulled Harry back into his embrace for another kiss.
Draco arrived home the next day and it was all he could do, not to burst out laughing. Harry was in the living room, leaping about, brandishing his wand at random objects shouting "scourgify" and laughing delightedly as it became sparkling clean. He turned around and spotted Draco smirking at him. Harry looked down, pointed his wand at Draco's shoes and deadpanned "scourgify", instantly cleaning them of the dirt Draco had just trailed into the house.
"Scourgify," he said again, cleaning up the mess Draco had left.
"Very good, my love. You're a fast learner," Draco said, fighting the urge to roll his eyes at his idiot of a fiancé.
"Well, I had a good teacher. One who only laughs at me for a little bit," Harry said, biting his bottom lip.
"Only because you're so…well Harry," Draco said, shaking his head. "Come with me. You're going to love this new spell I teach you."
Draco took Harry by the hand and led him off to the bedroom.