The Armada. An unimaginable fleet of irken technology and inginuity. Of course, a lot of the tech to make it was probably stolen from other races when the irkens enslaved them, but that's another story.
After the first Armada was destroyed due to Zim sending them all into a Florpus by accident, it had to be rebuilt. It took a year of round-the-clock building from a majority of scientists, engineers, and other such work force, but it was built.
And of course, the whole thing was lead by a new and improved Massive, the lead ship of the Armada. It came with upgraded weaponry, thicker hulls, bigger snack storage, and jumbo sized cup holders for those really big drinks.
And inside that very Massive were the ones leading them all on Operation: Impending Doom III, Tallests Red and Purple.
"Let's see here..." Red hummed as he ran down the list of invaders out in the universe preparing planets for conquest. "How is Invader Blurch?"
"According to latest reports, he has successfully intergrated himself within the government of Cherxquinva, home of the gluttonous Vastons." a random irken read off.
"I'd be sad that he had to put on so much weight to fit in if not for the fact that he's got an entourage carrying him everywhere." Purple commented. "Plus, he got to gorge himself on their snacks."
"They always make the best snacks. When we conquer that world, it'll be us who will gorge on them!" Red declared.
"Yeah!" Purple agreed before shoving some nachos into his mouth.
"Next up is Invader...Gerf." Red read aloud. "Status?"
"The war that was ongoing on planet Nuvoln was about to reach a conclusion with the peace talks. However, they've reported that they have reignited the conflict by killing high profile targets on each side and left evidence that points to the other side." another irken answered.
"HA! By the time we get there, we won't even need half the Armada to take over!" Purple exclaimed with a laugh.
"Yeah, but while having Nuvoln destroy it's own military in war would make it easier for us, it'll also use up it's resources in the process." Red stated in an analytical tone. "Perhaps we can swing by and take over before most of the planet is dead."
"Meh." Purple grunted before another random irken dramatically cried out.
"INCOMING TRANSMISSION!...from Earth." they finished in a calm tone. Both Tallest's eyes widened before Purple started laughing.
"I told you he'd call within 24 hours of getting this mission!" he gloated. "I win the bet!"
"Fine. The double-cream filled doughnuts are yours." Red growled before turning to the screen. "Put him on."
A moment later had the screen shift to an image of a smiling Zim, but were quite confused with his current state. Mainly because is face was covered in sweat, light scratches, and little marks around his neck.
"Zim? What happened to you?" Red asked, genuinely curious.
"Yeah. You look like you fought the rabid cat people of Snoof." Purple commented.
"That iz...Iyuh..." Zim said in a goofy tone before shaking himself and getting serious. "Apologies, my Tallest. I just got out of a rough session of mating with an earth female."
"So you're saying that the mission is going smoothly?" Red asked while shooting a glance at Purple, who started looking grumpy.
"Indeed. I have been successfully spliced with human DNA and have obtained human genitalia. I've also, as I've stated before, mated with a human female." Zim reported.
"Very good, Zim." Red said with a grin while Purple scowled. "Is that where you acquired those injuries?"
"She likes it rough." Zim chuckled before becoming serious again. "However, I have learned that my current dwelling is not suitable to house the women I impregnate, so I must relocate. I shall contact you again when I have set up a more suitable base. Also, as much as I've grown accustomed to hyuman food, I request an order of snacks. That is all. Breeder Zim, signing off." Zim said with a salute before the transmission cut.
"Well, looks like Zim's mission is running smoothly." Red said before chuckling at Purple. "And I just won the side bet. Meaning you can't eat those doughnuts for three hours."
"Mrfmgmafmh!" Purple grumbled in anger. "I hope that whatever side effects show up turn him inside out."
"I hate him too, but our species is in danger." Red stated before tapping his chin. "Still, I can't help but wonder what side effects will happen."
Gaz was inside her car outside of Zim's base, waiting for him to end his call and get his base ready to transport. At her request, the two would travel around a bit by car to find a suitable place to move to. They would also keep an eye out for any suitable women for Zim to add to his harem of breeders. Some of them she knew as she had made friends with other girls growing up, either on video chats or from meeting them while travelling with her father whenever he went places to show off his latest inventions. She was knocked out of her musings when she noticed Zim, GIR, and Minimoose came out of the house, with the former two in disguises.
GIR was in his typical dog disguise and Minimoose was in his toy airplane disguise. Zim's disguise however, with Gaz's help, underwent a bit of a change.
His wig and contacts were the same, but he was now sporting a plain gray t-shirt, blue jeans, and black canvas high top sneakers.
"I still wish to know why she wanted me to wear human clothing. My uniform would've been fine after a little mending." Zim grumbled before turning to the house. "Computer! Pen Mode!"
"Understood." came Computer's answer from inside the house.
Gaz watched as the pipes and tubes on the side of Zim's house disconnected from the nearby houses while the lawn decorations, house walls, and roof all either disappeared or fazed out. She could hear what she assumed was the underground base shift and compress until it all ended up in the shape of a pen that Zim caught upon completion. With that done, Zim and GIR turned and walked towards Gaz's car.
"That whole base came from that little pen?" Gaz asked as she eyed the item in question before Zim put it in his pocket.
"Never underestimate the ingenious work of irken technology." Zim boasted as he and GIR buckled up.
"What about your ship?" Gaz asked, wondering where his ship went.
"I have it cloaked and set to autopilot." Zim answered as a shadow passed over the car, it's owner what looked to be a giant rubber ducky.
"...Subtle." Gaz commented as she watched it float on before sticking her head back into the car and starting it. "Alright, here we go." she said before they drove off in search of a new place to live.
"Where exactly are we going, Gaz?" Zim asked as they drove past the familiar neighborhoods.
"I looked up a few spots that may be perfect for you to blend in and set up a new base. Places that would accept your 'skin condition' and all." she answered.
"This place accepted me just fine." Zim said while looking at himself in the mirror.
"This place is also full of absolute morons." Gaz countered, having seen the absolute stupidity of the city's populace since she was a toddler.
"True." Zim nodded, remembering all the idiotic humans he'd encountered all the way up through High Skool. Thank the Control Brains he took those college courses online. All the work, none of the socialization.
"Plus, I have some friends who'd love to meet you." Gaz added with a smile.
"Are scary Gazzy's friends like Gazzy?" GIR asked.
"Some." Gaz said with a shrug. "A lot of them are misfits or social outcasts, but most are good people at heart."
"Do they...know who I am?" Zim asked in suspicion.
"If you're talking about them knowing you're an alien, then yes. I sent them a picture of you in your human disguise. They figured it out, but kept mum." Gaz answered. "If they had spilled, you would've had the government busting down your down years ago. Trust me, they won't talk."
Hearing the positive reinforcement from her words made Zim smile a little.
"Alright Gaz. I trust you, and I'll trust your friends for now." he finally decided. "Come to think of it, what are your friends like besides being social outcasts and such?"
"I don't want to spoil anything, but I will say this. Even if they're social outcasts, they have the kind of figures that make men of low and high society can't stop ogling." Gaz said with a grin.
"You mean like yours?" Zim asked with a snicker, earning a light punch from the busty woman. "Hey! Easy with the arm! It's still healing after our last session." Zim playfully whined.
"Pfft. Whiner." Gaz chuckled as they drove on.
"So, what's our first stop?" Zim asked.
"An odd little place a few cities over called Hill Valley." Gaz answered. "It'll take us around three days to get there."
"Three days?" Zim repeated in disbelief. "The Voot Cruiser can make that trip in a few minutes!"
"Yeah, but if we just hop right over there, we could miss a lot of potential women from any of the places we visit from here to there." Gaz countered before giving him a smile. "And besides, even if we don't meet anyone or find any other place to put your base, we can still have some alone time during the trip. Just you and me."
"A hotel room?" Zim asked, catching on to her meaning.
"Lover's Suite." Gaz said as she and Zim began to lose themselves in the other's eyes.
"Can I order room service?!" GIR suddenly yelled, snapping them out of it and reminding them that he was with them.
"Squeak!"
And Minimoose as well.
"We may need to think of a few plans to occupy them. "Zim said while motioning towards the two in the backseats.
"Right." Gaz nodded, a faint blush on her cheeks.
-Night of the Second Day-
The four had been doing a bit of sightseeing as they ventured onward towards Hill Valley.
GIR was going about in his dog suit either causing chaos or enjoying the night life, mostly with girls since they found him utterly adorable.
Minimoose floated around doing his own thing, though he did grab the attention of a lot of children whenever he flew over their heads, making them squeal in joy and ask their parents to get them one.
As for Zim and Gaz?
"Pick up pick up pickupickupickup!" ranted Dib as he held a cellphone up to his ear.
Dib was a tall man who wore glasses, had a large head (though he keeps denying that it is large), the older brother of Gaz, a paranormal investigator, member of the Swollen Eyeball, and arch nemesis of Zim. He too had grown over the years, being a few inches taller than Gaz. He head a lean build with some muscle, all of which was hidden under a large black trench coat, black pants, and steel toed shoes. He had been the only one besides Gaz to know that Zim was an alien bent on ruling the Earth, though he was the only one of the siblings to actively try and thwart Zim at every turn, which is why, to him anyways, the Earth was still unconquered.
Still, he did have a real job and had to do it, since spying on Zim didn't pay the bills. Which is why he was now staring at a vacant lot with a big hole in the ground that once housed the irken's base. When he saw that it was all gone, he did the first thing that came to mind.
He stared at it for about 15 minutes before his brain finally caught up to what his eyes were seeing.
The second thing was that he whipped out his phone and speed dialed the only person he could talk to about Zim's true nature.
"Come on Gaz! Pick up already!"
Now if only the one he was calling would pick-
"H-Hello?!" came Gaz's voice on the other end.
"Gaz! You're never gonna believe this! Zim's base is gone! And so's his ship! And little robot! And flying moose! And Zim too! And-"
"Dib! Shut up!" Gaz snapped over the line, making him wince and pull the phone from his ear. "I can hear you just fine without you yelling! Calm down, take a breath, and then rant."
"Okay." Dib sighed before taking a slow breath in, then letting it out even slower. "As I was saying, Zim's gone. His base, minions, and everything else too. All of it!"
"And you called me about this why?" she asked, her breathing slowly getting a little funny.
"Well I can't call dad! He's so wrapped up in his work that he thought I was some stranger and blocked my number...again." he answered, muttering the last word in annoyance. "Gotta remember to get a new phone later."
"Fantastic Dib. Can you bother somebody eeLse now?!"
"You okay? You sound kind of funny." Dib commented.
"I'm a little b-bit busy at moment-AH!"
"Gaz?! What's wrong?! What are you-"
"Ahahahaaa! Stop tickling me! I'm on the phone!" he heard her giggle.
"What in the-?! Gaz, what is going on over-"
"I'm fucking my boyfriend! Goodbye!" she answered while stifling her laughter before hanging up.
"...When did she get a boyfriend?" Dib asked before his eyes went weird. "WHY WOULD SHE ANSWER WHILE SCREWING HIM?!"
"Why'd you keep tickling me?" Gaz asked as she rode Zim inside their hotel room.
"Punishment for talking to your big headed brother while we're mating." Zim answered with and annoyed scowl. "Why'd you even answer in the first place?"
"He'd have call non-stop if I hadn't answered. You want my ringtone to keep going off while we screw around?" she asked.
"No. Especially when your ringtone is your brother screaming 'My head's not big' over and over." Zim huffed before suddenly chuckling. "I can only imagine his face after what you said before hanging up."
"...Oh fuck me!" Gaz cursed, realizing she just said that to her paranormal, paranoid brother.
"Gladly." Zim snickered before bucking harder, making her bounce on his cock at a faster speed. Gaz moaned in delight as Zim watched her tits jiggle all over with each thrust.
Gaz wailed in pleasure as Zim shot into her again, making her belly swell once more before it ended again.
"I don't know what's more strange. How much I have inside my testicles, or how you seem to be able to hold so much." Zim wondered out loud while gently poking her swollen stomach.
"Could be one of those side-effects. You did say that using that gene-splicing tech had unpredictable side-effects for both you and any girl you bang." Gaz answered as she tried to catch her breath.
"True." Zim nodded before seeing Gaz gently rub her stomach. "Hmm?"
"Just wondering what'll be like when I finally do become pregnant." she said, answering his unasked question. "I wonder if I'll become a good mother."
"If you care about the smeet as you did to stop me from killing myself, then I know you'll make a great mother." Zim answered. Gaz looked down at him smiling up at her, her eyes starting to well up.
"You and that mushy talk." she sniffled as she rubbed her eyes before leaning down and kissing him.
It was around noon when the group finally made it to Hill Valley, their first official stop in their search for a new home and hopeful harem recruit. Gaz stopped the car at the top of a hill overlooking the whole town, where she and Zim could immediately see the difference. One side seemed to shine with huge mansions, clean houses and streets, and clean air surrounding the hill part of Hill Valley. And then there was the valley part of Hill Valley. Dingy, disgusting, dirty, and so much more was wrong with the place.
"What kind of place is this? It looks as different as a Gurvien Flxinal and a Burgzo Xlifnar." Zim stated.
"Pretend I don't know what those are." Gaz said in annoyance.
"How do you hyumans say it? Night and Day?" Zim tried again.
"Better. And yeah. My friend told me that half this place is corrupt and full of vile people who don't care about anything but themselves." Gaz sighed while looking at the town.
"I can tell that from up here." Zim said as he stared at the filthy valley, glaring at it like it was a boil on the butt of life. His eyes opened a little wider when he felt Gaz gently clasp the sides of his head and turn it towards the hill side.
"Zim...that is the corrupt half." Gaz corrected.
"Eh?" Zim said in confusion.
"The rich people are corrupt and use their money, influence, and power to do what they want. They treat the people of the Valley poorly and don't fear the law since they have the police in their pocket." Gaz explained. "And I know because my family came through here once. Not even a minute had passed before I could tell this place was rotten." Gaz explained as she looked at the Hills with disdain.
"I see." Zim nodded before looking up at Gaz. "And your friend lives...?"
"In the Valley." she finished while looking down at the valley. "And don't worry. It may be an overgrown cess pit, but the people there a whole lot nicer. Now come on. Let's go find a hotel and set up for our short stay here."
"In which part?" Zim asked while grimacing at the Valley. Even if they were nice people, he'd rather not spend a night in a hotel there.
"I hate the hills, but we'll be staying at the hotel there. I'll pay since you paid for the last hotel we stayed in." Gaz said as they drove towards the city.
"Squeak?"
"Yes, Minimoose. You can have your own room since GIR kept you up all night at the last one." Gaz said, sounding like a mother for a moment.
A group of young men and women, mostly women, were sitting around on the outside dining area, talking and eating an expensive array of fresh seafood delicacies for their Daily Brunch at the finest five star hotel in Hill Valley.
"Ah. Nothing quite beats the taste of seafood flown in straight from overseas." said a young man in a business suit and slicked back blonde hair named Jared Klimer.
"Especially when it's eaten just after tormenting those freaky Valley people." commented his sister, a blonde bombshell of a women named Debbie Klimer, leader of the identical looking women surrounding them, all of whom were also named Debbie.
"And just think. When you take over as Manager of Globocide, you'll be paid to watch that valley trash work!" laughed another young man with black hair named Blaine, owner of the hotel they were all eating at.
"Yeah." Jared chuckled just as one of the hotel porters came up to them all.
"Um, excuse me, sir?" the porter spoke in a timid voice towards Blaine.
"Can't you see we're having brunch here?!" Blaine snapped with a glare. "Whatever it is, tell me then turn in your uniform because you're fired!"
"P-Please sir! I know you hate being interrupted, but the concierge sent me. He's having a difficult time with someone who made a reservation!" the poor porter said, almost in tears at the thought of losing his job.
"If they have a reservation here, then they should be treated as well as all the other guests." Blaine said in a bored tone one would use when explaining something for the millionth time.
"Well, the problem isn't the one who made the reservation. It's the people that they have accompanying them. They're not quite...up to your hotel's standards, and were asked to leave, but they refuse to budge." the porter explained.
"Is it those valley weirdos trying some kind of stunt?" Blaine asked in irritation. "Who are they? What do they look like?"
"It's a group of four...I think?" the porter began. "They consist of a green skinned teenager named Zim."
"Yuck!" a Debbie said in disgust.
"A little green dog they call GIR."
"Eww!" all the Debbies cried out.
"A little flying thing that looks like a toy airplane, but it's got big eyes."
The Debbies didn't know what to think about that one.
"Sounds like a group of freaks." Blaine said as he and Jared prepared to sip their imported coffee.
"And the final one, the one who made the reservation with full V.I.P. access is a young woman by the name of Gazlene Membrane."
PFFFFFT!
And proceeded to spew it all over the porter, who was now covered in hot coffee and screaming that it burns.
"G*cough cough*Gaz Membrane?!" Blaine yelped in shock, his eyes as wide as Jared and all the Debbies.
"As in daughter of the Professor Membrane?!" Jared asked.
"AAHHHH! HOT! HOOOOT!" the porter screamed as he ran around in pain, leaving the group of rich people to head for the elevators. Jared Klimer and his sister went with Blaine while the rest of the Debbies got into the other elevator.
"If it is her, then I need to make sure not to anger her!" Blaine said, his attitude doing a 180 from annoyed to afraid. He and the other kids from school, both hill and valley residents, had met the Membranes when they came to town years ago. She was just a little girl then, but she scared the absolute shit out of everybody. The only ones she even remotely spoke to were that little group lead by that one weird kid named Milo Oblong.
"I wonder how she turned out." Jared said, his fear far less visible. "I remember that she kept hitting that pizza arcade. Always got extra large of everything."
"You think she's a bloated ball of fat?" Blaine questioned.
"Maybe she's as big as Helga Phugly." Debbie Klimer said, earning a round of laughter from all three of them at the thought of another girl as fat and ugly as Helga.
"Please don't make me laugh." Blaine snickered. "I gotta be professional." He straightened up when the elevator hit the ground floor, letting the three off. They were shortly joined by the rest of the Debbies coming off the other elevator before they all walked towards the front desk, where they could hear a woman arguing with the concierge.
"Please understand, Miss Membrane! It's perfectly alright for you to stay at the hotel. It's your guests that cannot stay." the man said, trying to reason with her.
"Just because he's got green skin? He's not carrying a disease, you moron! And when I made the reservation, you yourself said that there's no rule against having pets!" Gaz replied, getting up in the man's face.
"W-Well, when you made the reservation for two, plus one dog and this strange toy, you didn't say that they were green skinned. The hotel has a strict 'No Valley Dwellers' policy, and the owner would have all our jobs for allowing a teenager with green skin to stay." the man explained.
"First off, he's 23. Second, if you don't give me the key to our room in the next ten seconds-"
"Excuse me. Could you not threaten my employees?" Blaine said, sounding professional. He was ready to try and speak to Gaz Membrane and her friends, only to find his mind stopping and his jaw dropping alongside Jared's when she turned to face them.
"You the owner?" she asked Blaine, only to receive mumbled gibberish in return. She narrowed her eyes at them, not even needing to follow their gaze to tell that they were looking at her boobs. Even the Debbies were staring at them for a moment before looking down at their own breasts in shame.
"Hey!" Gaz yelled, snapping them out of it. "Can you get this dumbass to give us our room key or what?"
"I'm sorry, sir! She wouldn't listen to me and-"
"Give them their room key. I'll talk with them myself in private." Blaine said.
"Whuh? Uh, I mean, yes!" the concierge said before fumbling with the keys. He finally handed Gaz her key, which she took before she stomped off to find their room. She was too annoyed to notice them all staring at her ass as she went.
"She looks and acts like Gaz Membrane. What do you think, Jared?" Blaine whispered.
"I think..." Jared began, his mind playing multiple scenarios. Each of them involving having a defenseless Gaz under his control, with a certain creepy girl cowering next to Gaz in his visions. "I want that woman!"
A/N: This won't end well, I'll tell you that.
If you want to throw them my way, I'll have humanoid aliens join in. And later on, I plan to have something happen to break through reality to other worlds. Why? Because Fanfiction, that's why! So don't forget to send requests.
Also, I haven't given up on my stories. This is a fic for fun that I don't have to spend working on complicated plots just to do a single chapter.
See ya.