By the time Hiei entered the house again, and Kurama was off to brew more tea, the TV had been turned off. Shizuru's car was gone, too. But instead of avoiding his eyes, like they had been doing before, Yusuke and Kuwabara were both staring at Hiei, the way they would stare at someone who had just grown an extra head.

"What are you two looking at?" Hiei snarled.

"Well, you just…you just…" Yusuke's voice faded into silence, and he pointed towards the couch.

"You left a stain," said Kuwabara. Yusuke elbowed him.

"I left a what?" Hiei whirled around to face the couch, and sure enough, there was a crimson stain about the size of a quarter sinking into the cream-colored cushions. Yusuke and Kuwabara kind of shrunk away, as if bracing for impact, and their fears were not unfounded.

Hiei let out a furious screech that could be heard a block away, the sound coming out high-pitched and shrill due to his new female vocal folds. Several birds outside chirped in alarm and flew out of their nests in the trees. How mortifying, how ridiculous, how infuriating. How could he possibly have ruined the couch in such a short amount of time? And not only had he ruined it, but he'd also ruined his clothes. Thank goodness he hadn't been wearing his cloak, but how had he managed to soak through the diaper and his pants?

Yusuke and Kuwabara both looked horrified, which was exactly why Hiei would have preferred to keep this to himself. Wasn't it enough that he had to feel so moody, endure physical pain, and bleed uncontrollably? Did he have to be treated like a freak, too, for what was supposed to be a perfectly normal process? It wasn't his problem that Yusuke and Kuwabara were immature idiots. If he was going to have to live as a girl for who knows how long, he might as well blow the whole thing wide open.

"You know what? Yeah! I have my period!" he shouted at them, determined to carry on despite the heat he still felt in his cheeks. "It's miserable, and I hate it, but at least it's normal! And you know what isn't normal? The living specimens of immaturity and asininity that I see sitting before me RIGHT NOW!"

"Wow, he really is hormonal," Kuwabara whispered to Yusuke, undoubtedly assuming that Hiei would be unable to hear him, but he was wrong. In an instant, the fire demon's hands were around his neck, threatening to crush his windpipe.

"STOP it, you two!" said Yusuke, pulling them apart. "Maybe Hiei's right and this doesn't have to be such a big deal. Just find something else to talk about. Kurama or Shizuru will probably know what to do about the stain."

"Whatever," said Hiei, standing up and preparing to leave for the third time that day. "I need to be alone."

Kurama had been trying to teach Hiei to say that; instead of escalating a fight that wasn't worth it, he explained, Hiei could just go off and be by himself until he calmed down. Those five words, "I need to be alone," were perfectly valid. It seemed like the best thing to do in this situation, and neither one of the humans questioned him as he stormed off.

After some time, when Hiei was convinced that he was far enough from town, he stopped jumping from branch to branch and landed in a particularly tall tree, making sure to disguise his energy so nobody would be able to find him. If he lay down on his back, he didn't feel himself bleeding so much, and while he was still uncomfortable, at least the stains weren't visible through his black clothing. The best thing to do now would be to take a nap, but it was hard because it felt like someone was slicing out his insides with a scalpel. What little the tea had done for him seemed to be wearing off.

Sitting in his tree, Hiei contemplated his next move. He thought he had done a pretty good job of telling those two off. It was true that he still felt shaken up, but like Yusuke said, it didn't have to be such a big deal. Didn't the girls and women he knew go through this every single month? It shouldn't have to be so debilitating.

Hiei wasn't sure how much time passed up in that tree, and he was amazed to find that he actually was drifting off. Maybe the hormones made him sleepy, too. So he was a little bit startled when he heard a familiar voice calling for him.

"Where are you, Hiei?" It was Kurama. "Hiei!"

It was no surprise that Kurama went searching, but not even Hiei knew where he was right now. So how had Kurama found him? Hiei just ignored the calls and scooted farther back on the branch he was occupying. Like he said, he needed to be alone.

"Do you want your tea to get cold?"

Raspberry tea? The chance to make these cramps go away, or at least get a little less awful? That sounded so unbelievably good…but no. Kurama was just trying to tempt him.

"You should be right here," Kurama said, standing right underneath Hiei's tree. The fire demon was about to jump to another one when he felt a particularly harsh cramp in his abdomen and involuntarily cried out in pain. Then he was pissed at himself for giving away his position.

"Dammit!" he cursed, gripping his stomach with one hand and holding onto the tree branch with the other.

"Just come back," Kurama called. "Nobody's angry or upset with you."

"I don't care."

"You have five seconds to climb out of that tree or else," said Kurama, trying a different tack.

"Or else what?" Hiei challenged.

At these words, a familiar thorny green vine snapped up and wrapped itself around the edge of the branch, then tugged. Hiei was sure Kurama was going to cut the tree branch off and cause Hiei to fall, but the next thing he knew, Kurama was up there, too, sitting next to him. Hiei squeezed the branch firmly with both hands, just to steady himself.

"Word to the wise, Hiei," Kurama said lightly. "Never say that to me again."

"You know, I really wish you would stop doing things like that," Hiei snapped. "I was just doing what you said. Getting alone time instead of fighting with those cretins."

"You're right," Kurama said after a short pause. "You deserve some alone time, and quite frankly, I can definitely understand why you would want it. But Yusuke and Kuwabara thought you were running away because you stained the couch."

"Well, I wasn't," said Hiei. "I'm just so damn sick of everything. How did you find me here, anyway?"

"Honestly? I just had to follow the smell of blood."

"It's that strong?" said Hiei in disbelief.

"No, no," said Kurama. "I've always had an excellent sense of smell. Being able to sniff out blood came in very handy in my old life, even if it's not so useful to have that ability now. I don't really want or need to know where someone is in their reproductive cycle, but I've always been able to tell. I doubt anyone else will be able to, though, so don't worry."

The last three words out of Kurama's mouth were so soft, so warm and comforting, that Hiei—who had finally been calming down—suddenly felt tears burning in the corners of his eyes again. There was a lump in his throat the size of a lemon. Kurama seemed to sense it, because he set his hand on Hiei's shoulder again. This time, Hiei felt no urge to shake it off.

"It's okay to feel like this, Hiei, believe me," Kurama said. "It doesn't make you weak. In fact, sitting with your emotions and allowing yourself to feel them is just about the toughest thing you could ever do. That's how Yusuke unleashed his true power in the tournament, remember?"

"Yeah, I remember," said Hiei reluctantly, and since he'd been losing the fight to begin with, he finally gave in and let himself cry.

"That's good," Kurama whispered, patting him on the back. "Perfect."

Eventually, Hiei cried himself out, and he was surprised that when he did, he felt a whole lot better. He gave Kurama a watery smile.

"Thanks," he said, swallowing. "It's just rough being in a new body, especially when I can't even control the things it does."

"Hmm, I wonder what that's like," Kurama joked.

"You can take it easy on the sarcasm." Hiei, relieved to be returning somewhat to his old self, glared at his friend. "I know the story. But you were just a baby, and a boy one at that. You didn't have to have your period or grow boobs."

"True, I didn't," said Kurama thoughtfully. "I did have to wear diapers, though, for about a year and a half straight. Since, you know, I had no control over any of my basic bodily functions. In fact, for the first few weeks, I couldn't even lift my own head up. I couldn't talk, either, so I had to lie there and scream while my mother tried to figure out what was wrong with me."

"Well, you didn't have cramps," said Hiei, as if this was some sort of contest.

"No," Kurama replied, "but I did get a stomachache at my mealtimes, more often than not, and I had to be burped. If I wasn't burped, I would throw up all over my clothes, and half the time they didn't even bother changing me into new clothes because they knew I would just mess them up again. When I was a baby, I barely had control over anything at all. In fact, given the choice, I might take teenage girl over baby boy."

"You're insane," Hiei told him. "If you end up getting your period too, you'll take that back."

"I think we're getting off track here," said Kurama. "Come on. Like I said, your tea's getting cold. I planted some seeds to show us the way back home."

"It's kind of hard to walk like this," Hiei admitted, as Kurama jumped down from the tree. "I feel like I sat on a rainy bench."

"You just need a shower and a change of clothes," said Kurama.

"I haven't got a change of clothes."

"You can borrow my robe while we wash the ones you've got on, then."

"But I don't want to stain it."

"I'll just wash it if you do," Kurama reassured him. "Just change that thing more often. I brought some extras from home."

…

Kurama was able to bring Hiei home pretty quickly after that. He set the fresh tea down on the kitchen table, and Hiei drank it in earnest, scarfing down chocolate-chip cookies in between. (Kurama had heard that chocolate was good for this sort of thing.) He was just finishing off the last cookie when they heard a car door slam.

"That must be Shizuru," said Hiei. "I hope she's not angry."

"She won't be," said Kurama. "In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if this has happened to her, too. I'll talk to her for you."

"That's okay." Hiei swallowed his cookie and stood up. "This is something I have to do on my own."

"No, you really—"

"Give it a rest," said Hiei, leaving the kitchen. Kurama watched him intercept Shizuru as she walked over the threshold, her arms full of shopping bags. Hiei took them from her and set them on the floor.

"Wow, thanks, Hiei," she said in surprise. "When did you become so helpful?"

"Never mind that," Hiei told her. "Look, I have to tell you something. You know how we're all stuck in female bodies for now?"

"Yeah."

"Well…" Hiei sighed. "I got my period and stained your couch. Sorry."

"Don't be stupid," she said, and Kurama was relieved to see her smile at him. "Accidents happen, you know. Especially to first-timers. In fact…" Shizuru grinned. "Once, when I was nineteen, I was at some guy's house, and I stained his couch in the same way. But I told him it was just the wine we were drinking."

"Did he believe you?"

"Sure did." Shizuru laughed. Kurama got up to follow as she and Hiei walked into the living room to inspect the damage. They watched her look it over, and finally she said, "That's it?"

Yusuke and Kuwabara turned to look at her.

"Oh, hey, sis," said Kuwabara. "You think you can get this stain out?"

"Well, not necessarily," she told him. "I was never so great at Home Ec. But that couch was a piece of junk, anyway. This is the excuse I need to buy a new one." She paused. "And speaking of buying things, I've got the new bras."

Surprisingly, Yusuke was the first to approach her.

"Okay, team," he said in a resigned sort of way. "Let's start embracing our womanhood."