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Sarah came in from work one night to find Nick sitting in the kitchen with the dog. He was looking at his phone, as teenagers did. Of course, she was often glued to her tablet, so she wasn't one to judge.
"Had a good day, Nicky?"
"Mmm."
He always had an answer of some kind. Sarah was concerned at the lack of response. "What's up?"
As she put the groceries down on the counter, Nick seemed to be debating what to tell her. She was relieved when he started talking. "I said I'd go on a date with this girl, but I kind of also agreed to go to Charlie's birthday party on the same day."
Sarah smiled at him, remembering how incredibly vital these things had seemed when she was a teenager. "Oh, do you like this girl?" Maybe she'd been thinking about Nick's growing friendship with Charlie all wrong.
"Well, um …" He thought about that. "Her dog died."
That was not what she had expected to hear. "Uh … not following." Sarah leaned across the counter, listening.
"She was really upset, and I felt bad. And she asked me out and I didn't know how to say no. And I tried to tell her we probably shouldn't go out, and I couldn't. Because I didn't want to upset her when she was already crying about her dog."
Sarah nodded, understanding now where the dog had come in. "Oh, okay." Her Nicky had such a generous heart. Too tender for his own good. But learning that a quick no was more kind than a lingering maybe came with age and experience.
"I mean …" Nick looked away, thinking about it, before continuing, "A lot of people are expecting us to get together, but I don't think I like her like that."
"You shouldn't go out with someone because you feel sorry for them."
He nodded. "Yeah."
"Don't worry. The right girl will come along, just you wait." Sarah pushed herself off the counter and turned toward the cupboard for a teacup, kicking herself. It would have been so easy to have said "person" instead of "girl", to leave him an opening just in case the mention of Charlie's birthday next to this date Nick didn't want to go on had more meaning than just an accident of scheduling. He didn't respond to the comment, and she didn't want to pry, and one more chance to get to the bottom of why he was preoccupied so much of the time had passed.
Over dinner, Sarah kept looking over at him and finding him frowning to himself, lost in thought. Eventually, she asked, "What are you thinking of, Nicky? You look so serious."
"Oh. Do I?" He smiled. "I was just thinking about what to get Charlie for his birthday. I don't know when I could go out to buy anything."
She frowned thoughtfully, both surprised and somehow not surprised to find that was what he was thinking. "No, there isn't much time this week, is there? What does he like?"
"Um … Books. Music. But you never know what someone already has, and a book is kind of a boring present."
"I like them." She smiled at him, thinking of all the books he'd given her for birthdays. Of course, that was very different. "But I see what you mean. Well, what do the two of you do together?"
Nick nearly choked on his water at the question, and Sarah couldn't help wondering what had been so startling about it. At last, he said, "Well, MarioKart. He beats me literally every time. And—and you know what was a great day? That day he came over and it snowed."
Sarah watched him smile as he thought back on the day. He looked different—there was a warmth in his eyes, a softness in his face, that she had never seen before. She caught her breath. Anyone who made Nick look like that had to be very special indeed. And suddenly she felt that everything she'd suspected might well be true. It seemed that her son had learned to care for another boy.
Her heart hurt for him, going through this on his own. He must have so many questions. She felt badly that he didn't feel comfortable talking to her about this, but she supposed it was awkward enough to talk to your mum about these things as a boy if you were straight. More complicated feelings must be so much worse.
Still … he looked so happy right now, thinking of Charlie, and he was so happy when Charlie was round, that Sarah couldn't think of this as anything but a good thing, in the end.
Nick looked up at her. "D'you know if we have any picture frames?"
"Yeah, we should have some. Check the cupboard in the washroom, I think I put a few in there at some point."
"Thanks, Mum." He got up and came around the table and hugged her.
"Happy I could help." She put her arms around him and held on to him tightly, wanting him to feel how fiercely she loved him. Whatever else was happening with him, she hoped he knew that.