Disclaimer: I do not own the rights to Inuyasha, all rights belong to the creator, Rumiko Takahasi. I also lay no claim on the creation of Robin Hood.
Chapter Seventeen: Miroku's Childhood, Robin's Guilt
The late afternoon sun had slowly begun its descent as the evening was fast approaching. The pair had gone beyond the river, but Miroku found it difficult to go further without the company of Inuyasha. Leaving the hanyo behind was a key part of the plan, Naraku had seen his face, and it was best to keep suspicion off of Inuyasha and Koga for as long as possible. Despite how well the plan went, he knew he hadn't been absolved of any impression he had made with the prince.
Turning to Koga, he addressed him with some fatigue. "Why don't you head back to camp? I think I'll wait here until Inuyasha can catch up."
"Do you think it's wise to stay here alone? I mean we are still pretty close to the village." The wolf yokai's concerns were not unfounded, Robin's face had been revealed, and everything would surely be changed.
He would have to be more careful now and pray that King Hitomi would return before things ended badly for him. "I'll be vigilant, concealing myself until I see who's coming. I just cannot bring myself to go any further until he is safely back here." He looked back towards the village, an unreadable expression on his face.
Koga reluctantly agreed, he never did like to wait around, so he'd head back and set up their grounds again. "Okay, but stay alive or Inuyasha will kill me for leaving you here alone."
Offering a crooked smile, he assured him, "I am capable of fighting for myself, you have nothing to worry about."
The yokai gave the thief a quick once over and frowned. "Sure, but Inuyasha isn't going to be thrilled when he sees you."
Confused, he asked, "Why? I do not need you to be my escort."
"Never said you did," he tossed back casually, "it has nothing to do with my leaving you here. You know how protective he is of you and well…" His words trailed off and he shrugged. "I think I'll just let you see his wrath for yourself. You may be okay and alive, but still." He elaborated no further, instead turned to make his departure. He did offer one last thing before disappearing, "Good luck calming him down though."
Rather befuddled by the exchange he had shared with the yokai, Miroku sighed, and did his best to push the whole conversation from his mind. He plucked an apple from a nearby tree, before concealing himself in its branches.
The minutes became hours and there had still been no sign of the hanyo. Miroku, by this time, started to worry. It wasn't like Inuyasha to dally, so something had to be keeping him in Nakimoto. Perhaps it was a necessary action to keep his innocence intact, leaving too soon may arouse suspicion, and that thought was far more reassuring than the others. Just as he had considered returning to the village, the hanyo broke through the treeline.
Breathing a sigh of relief, Miroku leapt down from his perch and tossed an apple to the unsuspecting half demon; who had somehow managed to swiftly catch it. Inuyasha eyed his prize catch, he mumbled a quick thanks, and took a bite before he redirected his attention to the thief. Giving him a quick once over, he scowled. "Geez, they really did a number on you. Didn't they?"
Miroku's gaze dropped to examine himself, but returned his eyes back to Inuyasha, a puzzled expression on his face. "I don't know what you mean. The plan went off exactly as it ought. I escaped with minimal injuries."
The hanyo discarded the apple and closed the space between them. He took up his arm and scoped out the damage for himself and although there were no serious wounds, he still found himself furious. "They didn't have to be so rough with you. Not even a fair trial before charging you and sentencing you for the crimes."
Miroku shrugged, it came as no surprise that the prince cared so little of the law and how he enforced it. "Well, to be fair, I am guilty of all I was accused of. I had no expectations of being treated kindly today." Hoping to change the subject he gestured towards the apple. "That was rather wasteful, you know?"
Rolling his golden hazel eyes, Inuyasha demanded, "Forget the blasted apple and focus for a minute, Miroku."
Tossing his hands up in quick surrender, he appeased his companion. "All right, I'm focused." He raked his fingers through his hair and watched as Inuyasha took to pacing, something he only did when annoyed or frustrated.
The hanyo huffed out a sharp puff of breath, as he did his best to reel in his anger. He had no intention of directing his emotions to the wrong person, he wasn't angry with Miroku, but he felt anger all the same. "If you could see that bruise on your face, maybe you wouldn't be so calm. To hit you with such force, the disrespect of such an action it's, well it's unforgivable." He paced quicker now and he murmured threats of violence against Naraku.
Miroku tried in vain to get the hanyo's attention, but after his name had been ignored for the fifth time, Miroku stepped in front of him, took him by the shoulders, and commanded it. "Inuyasha, please, calm yourself." He smiled as the mumbling had given way to a quiet reprieve. "That's better," he spoke with a gentle tone now, one that was meant to reassure. "These injuries are superficial and I will heal without a single scar left behind. I am alive and that is the best outcome to have achieved. Besides, as the village thief I have grown accustomed to being struck, it is nothing I haven't experienced before."
Though Inuyasha was his closest friend, knew him better than most, he was still rather uninformed on Miroku's childhood. It wasn't for lack of trying, Miroku spoke about himself to some extent, but rarely gave details. Everything with him was almost surface level. Inuyasha knew that his mother had died, but did not know how, and the same could be said about his father. Of course he knew that Miroku had taken to swiping spoils from the farmers, bakers, and shopkeepers, but he didn't know every detail of what had happened if he had been caught. Sometimes he wondered if he really knew Miroku at all.
Crossing his arms over his chest, he backed away from Miroku, his expression stoic. "Well, I don't know how you expect me to know what you've experienced in your life. It's not as though you have told me about your childhood." Emotions he had never felt before churned in his gut, weighing it down like a stone.
Miroku's held tilted slightly, taken aback by the hanyo's unprovoked accusations. Confused he enquired, "What is it that you are accusing me of? That I am secretive? That I am not to be trusted? That I am not the friend you believed me to be?"
What was he trying to say? He pondered the question a moment, his anger dissipated, and with a calm composure he answered. "No, that's not what I am trying to say. I mean who were you before all this, before running off to the mountains to train, before Robin, before the thievery, before your father's passing?"
"Oh, I was no one of consequence." His tone was so matter of fact and he had been able to keep the bitterness from his words as well.
Eager for answers, Inuyasha pressed on. "You meant something to your father, to Mushin, to Sango. Who were you before I met you that sunny spring day? How did you become the man you are today?"
Sighing, Miroku decided it was time to stop hiding his past from his most loyal companion. "I come from humble beginnings. A father, who was but a simple monk, and a gentle mother with a weak constitution. I was the second born, but my elder sister had been stillborn. My mother never did reclaim her glow after such a painful loss" He made his way to the riverbank, lowered himself into the grass, and got comfortable before continuing the tale that was his life. "Her health never did recover, she was weak, body and soul; regardless I was conceived and born. Yet I was not enough to cure her of her sadness and before my first birthday, she had succumbed to her heartbreak." As he spoke, Inuyasha had joined him by the water, and gave him his full attention. "It was just my father and I. After that, I trained at the temple with him and Mushin, and when they were away I was placed in the care of Keade. Though I had no mother, I was still happy. My life was full and I had all I needed. My father helped in the castle stables for extra income and I had the honor of meeting Sango. All was good, until it wasn't. Ten years of happiness, gone in an instant."
Inuyasha watched the soft smile fade from his face, and witnessed that always cheerful mask slip away. "What happened?", he asked in a whisper.
Miroku cast a sidelong glance at his audience of one, before returning his gaze to the sparkling river. "My father was sent away to aid another village; he was to cleanse it of a vengeful spirit. He never returned home, in his place was his staff, an earring, and a few blood stained sutras. Though I was told I could stay at the temple, if I continued to train under Mushin, I was angry. I was angry with the monastery, because had my father not been a monk, he would have still been with me. In that anger, I refused, and I left. I had been placed in the orphanage and life was not so good anymore." He looked at Inuyasha, his brows drawn together in a pained expression. "Things were rather terrible there. Though I left behind the monkhood, some of the training had stuck, and being a pacifist does little good when being bullied. The beatings I had received there, the meals I had taken from me, I became more bitter and eventually I ran from there too." His gaze fell, dropping to the grass.
Inuyasha waited for Miroku to continue, but he had grown silent and pensive, and the hanyo began to fear that he would not continue. So he asked, "How long were you there, in the orphanage?"
The question seemed to break Miroku from his quiet reverie, looking up again he hummed, perplexed. "Oh, I'm not sure I know. It's quite easy to lose track of the days when you stop caring enough to count them, but I would guess maybe six to eight months. But if my stay there had taught me anything, it was the lesson of if you want something you just had to take it. I stole from damn near everyone. Bakers, butchers, farmers, shopkeepers, and villagers, if I needed it I took it. Through all my failures, Mushin stuck by me and my friendship with Sango never faltered. They deserved much more than I ever gave them." He exhaled a slow breath and continued, "Then one day I got caught pickpocketing a traveling merchant; he had enough gold and silver to spare, or so I thought. Anyway, Hoshiyomi, the former sheriff of Nakimoto, placed me under arrest."
Inuyasha's eyes grew wide in disbelief, this was all very new information to him, and he still wanted to know more. Hungrily he pried deeper, "Wait. You were actually arrested? As in, you saw the inside of a cell?"
Miroku could not help but to smile at Inuyasha's incredulity. "Yes, Inuyasha, I have. I would have gotten the opportunity to know one quite well, had it not been for Sango. She pleaded with her uncle, King Hitomi, to show me some mercy. She used the case of my age, for I was young and foolish, but that she knew there was good in me. I was rewarded a second chance and it was but two days later that I happened across you. I did something far more wicked than stealing from your brother. T'was that day that I stole something far too valuable to put a price on and for that I can never apologise enough."
The hanyo's brow furrowed in confusion, he enquired. "What did you take? What happened?"
The thief's expression became pained. His heart ached with the knowledge that Inuyasha had trusted him enough to remain unaware of his selfish actions. "You see, that day I saw a boy, one that when I looked at him, I saw a piece of myself gazing back at me. I recognized that look, could see that he didn't feel as though he belonged, and in a moment of selfishness I did the unthinkable. I planted a seed of doubt and I stole from him his chance to belong. A took from him a life that should have been his and he followed me on a path not meant for him to walk. For that, Inuyasha, I humbly ask you to forgive me." Inuyasha's furrowed brows lowered, he grew contemplative, and he allowed Miroku's words to sink in. But before Inuyasha could reply, Miroku added, "Just know that I have not kept the story of my childhood from you because I did not trust you. I do, I trust you explicitly. You have been a most loyal companion and my dearest friend. I have remained quiet on the matter out of shame and shame alone."
He shook his head, his white hair flowed with the movement. "No, I never blamed you for my sense of not belonging. There is nothing to forgive. I made my choice on my own and I have never felt as though I didn't belong at your side. There is nothing for me to forgive, because you have not wronged me."
Miroku smiled. Not many were privy enough to see this side of the hanyo. Behind the ruff exterior was a heart of gold, one that Miroku could not boast for possessing himself. "You are too kind to me, but if you are in earnest, I ask you to make me a promise."
Rather skeptical, Inuyasha hesitantly replied, "That depends on what it is you're asking."
His expression turned serious, "I ask you to promise me that once King Hitomi returns and reigns again, that you will leave Blood Hound behind. Return to your life Inuyasha, find your father and brother, and take back the life I stole from you. Give yourself a chance to belong."
A sort of fear gripped the half demon, "But I do not want to leave you."
His features softened, "As if you could get rid of me so easily. I would visit frequently, check in on you."
"But I want to stay with you and Koga."
"Inuyasha, please. I do not want my life for you anymore. It is a lonely one and I have taken too much of your life as it stands. Just consider my words before you say no."
Inuyasha saw it now. The hurt he had never seen before. Miroku had always been so cheerful, warm, friendly, happy, but it was nothing but a mask. He did not want the life he led, he had wanted so desperately the belonging he was pleading with Inuyasha to find. Fate had stolen from him the very thing he blamed himself for taking from the hanyo. "I will make you this promise under one condition."
Earnestly he asked, "And what condition is that?"
Smiling warmly, Inuyasha replied, "That you must promise to give yourself another chance. Find your place, Miroku, you are far too good for this life. You have to find where you belong too, then I'll do the same."
His indigo eyes went misty, no one had ever requested of him to make such a promise, and it was all the more heartwarming to know that the hanyo believed he deserved such a gift. "Yes, right, of course." He was unable to speak the words I promise, but how he longed to try. Instead his mask slipped back into place and he smiled now as though nothing of a serious nature had passed between them. "We should head back to camp and have our supper. I must return here by midnight, I hope to see Sango here tonight."
"Miroku, the promise, you didn't promise me."
Miroku waved his hand dismissively, seemingly distracted by the direction of his thoughts. "You should come with me tonight. Yes. Sango will probably be in the company of her lady in waiting. You are quite fond of her, Lady Kagome, I mean. Is that not so?"
The way he spoke now was rather disjointed, a jumbled mess of thoughts that spilled out unfiltered. Inuyasha understood that the mask had been placed back on, but when he had dropped it, the mask had cracked. "Miroku, are you okay?", he asked carefully.
"Why yes, I am quite fine." He gestured in the direction of camp. "We should head back to Midori Wood and have our supper. Then I can come back here and await her visit. She may not come if she is angry with me, but if she does come, well, then that can only mean that she hasn't given up on me quite yet." He shook his head as though to shake the thoughts from his mind. "We should eat though. Yes. Let's head back to camp for dinner. Come now, Inuyasha." He turned from him then and began the journey to their little hideaway in the woods.
"Yeah, All right. I'm right behind you." Hesitantly he followed after Miroku. Now was not the time for Miroku to lose his confidence again. Things were different now, Naraku had seen his face. Inuyasha could only hope that Sango would meet with him tonight. For if she didn't, that could be the final blow to his sense of belonging. Inuyasha was no fool, even he could see that Miroku had always been in love with Maid Sango. If he were to lose her favor, he would lose what remained of Miroku. Robin would be all that was left to him and Robin has nothing to lose. The risks would be greater and caution tossed to the wind. If Sango failed to come, it may very well be the end of Miroku, and that realisation sent an icy chill down his spine.
((A/N Oh, how I enjoyed writing this chapter. I know you may have been expecting something much different, like the meeting with Sango, I felt this story needed this chapter. I had yet to delve into Miroku's past and give his Robin character more depth. I felt I needed to flesh him out more and by the time I had, well, I thought the chapter would be far longer than the rest if I had added the meet up. I promise the next chapter will give you the Miroku and Sango fluff you probably desired in this chapter. For good measure and as thanks for your patience, I promise to also sprinkle in some Inuyasha and Kagome fluff as well. Also another thanks to tinemelk for their consistent reviews, I love hearing from you with nearly every update. I know you are eagerly waiting for more Miroku and Sango moments. I will get it to you as quickly as I can. To any new or old readers please drop me a review, they absolutely make my day, and don't be afraid to favorite or follow. Until next time.))