Chapter 30

When Ginny first heard about the Yule Ball, she was beyond excited.

Then she heard that it was only open to fourth years and above, and the disappointment crushed her.

A small hope came back when they told her that younger students could be invited.

And then she was crushed again when she was confronted with Reality and knew that there was no way Harry would ever ask her.

Ginny knew that Harry liked Cho Chang, it had been obvious since last year. Although there was also that article about Harry and Hermione... Of course Ginny knew better than to believe anything that Rita Skeeter wrote (she highly doubted Harry ever cried, and even if he did he would never admit it to a reporter), but it was true that Harry and Hermione were always together, especially since Ron had began being a prat. She knew that Ron was jealous about that (he was jealous about everything concerning Harry). Ginny had not thought much about it at the time, relieved as she was that Harry had survived, but it had looked suspicious the way that Hermione had dragged Harry by the hand after the first task.

Or maybe he liked someone else? He was famous, and a champion, and he had just slain a dragon. Most people might be a bit afraid of him, and there might still be a lot of "Potter stinks"' badges around, but Ginny could not imagine anyone refusing Harry if he asked. She had already overheard a group of second year girls discussing whether it would be too bold to ask him, and even if they had enough time to learn the spell to change clothes' colours so they could match their dresses to Harry's eyes.

Whoever Harry was going to ask (or accept, it someone asked him), it definitely wasn't going to be Ginny, so she should just give up any hope in that regard. Harry didn't like her that way, he didn't even seem to remember that she existed most of the time. To him, she was just Ron's little sister, the pathetic girl that had been tricked by Tom Riddle and required saving a few years ago. And he had only saved her because that's what Harry did. He was a saviour, a hero. He would have risked his life to save anyone else.

She knew that she had to let go of the fantasy. It was just a stupid crush, right? Better to just accept that he would never look at her the way she wanted to be looked at.

Maybe someone else would ask her to the ball and she might at least have some fun. People said that Dumbledore had booked the Weird Sisters, and by all accounts the event was going to be awesome.

She had to know, though.

"Hermione..." she began one afternoon when she found her studying alone in a corner of the deserted Common Room. "Do you know who Harry is taking to the Yule Ball?"

Hermione looked up from her homework, her eyes suddenly full of concern. Was she worried about Ginny? Afraid of her reaction when she heard?

"I don't think he's taking anyone, yet," she said.

"He didn't ask you, then?"

Her question made Hermione obviously uncomfortable.

"He did," she said after a moment, to Ginny's immediate despair. Hermione rushed to clarify. "But just as friends. I couldn't say yes, though."

Ginny was confused.

"Why not?"

"Because I only wanted to say yes to help him. And Harry can't be helped," explained Hermione sadly.

It took a moment for the meaning of Hermione's words to sink in. Ginny already knew that Harry couldn't receive help in the Triwizard Tournament. She had tried to tell him about the possible Mermaids in the second task, but some weird magic seemed to make impossible even to leave around a piece of parchment with advice for him to find. But she would have never imagined that the no-help rule might apply to a ball too!

"Will he ask Cho, then?" asked Ginny after a minute.

Hermione sighed.

"I don't know, Ginny. He doesn't really want to ask anyone, you know? Harry doesn't even want to go to the ball, but he doesn't have a choice. Apparently he will die if he doesn't attend with a date."

"That's..."

"Ridiculous? Barbarous? Infuriating?" offered Hermione bitterly.

"Well... yeah."

Ginny was beginning to realize that feeling excited about a stupid ball had been beyond silly. It might be just a ball for most people, but apparently it was another deadly task for Harry. How unfair was that? He didn't even want to be in the Triwizard Tournament, and he was forced to go to a ball and bring a date (who didn't want to just help him) under threat of instant death?

No wonder Harry seemed so angry lately. It must be unbearable for him to see everyone so excited about the ball. Just like it must have been to be cheered or booed during the first task while he was almost burnt alive. And nobody could move a finger to help him.

Had Ginny wanted to attend the Yule Ball? Now all she wished was to blast the Goblet of Fire to pieces. She no longer cared who Harry took to the ball, she just hoped he would be able to ask someone to avoid dying.

After that horrible revelation, it didn't really shock her to hear that Hermione was going to the ball with Viktor Krum. It was shocking, of course, but it no longer seemed to matter who went with who. Ginny could only be glad that Krum had managed to find a date (although of course no one would have dared refusing him either), so the world would not lose one of the best Seekers alive.

And when a few days later Neville came to ask her if she would go to the Yule Ball with him, Ginny didn't even hesitate in saying no. Damned the Weird Sisters! She would not be complicit of an event that threatened to kill Harry.

Poor Neville seemed disappointed but not surprized at being rejected.

"It's not because of you, Neville," she assured him. And it was true. Even though of course her first choice would have been Harry, she liked Neville and would have had no trouble going with him —as friends— if this were not an evil ball. "I'm just not going."

"Oh, that's all right," he said with a shrug, "I didn't really expect... I doubt anyone will want to go with me. I mean, who would?"

"Don't be silly, Neville! At least you are brave enough to ask someone. Ron will probably go alone because he's too coward to invite anyone."

Neville seemed genuinely surprized at the compliment, or maybe at her poor opinion of her brother. But Ginny had very little patience with Ron these days. And as to Neville... She had to admit that most girls would probably turn him down if they had any other choice. He wasn't a popular boy, and his clumsiness promised a hard time in the dance floor. Also his lack of confidence wasn't very attractive. It would take a very special person to ignore all that...

"Hey, I've just had an idea. I know a Ravenclaw girl who might want to go with you, I can ask her for you if you want. She's really nice." It wasn't necessary to add that she was a bit crazy.

"Really?" exclaimed Neville in relief. "Oh, yeah, that would be great, Ginny!"

Ginny broached the subject with Luna the next day during Herbology.

"Going to the ball?" asked the Ravenclaw girl with wide eyes. "I had not thought about it. It will be full of Nargles, don't you think?"

"Nargles?"

"Yes, you know, in the mistletoe," said Luna dreamily. "But I suppose if I don't wear anything of value they will just ignore me. Or I could make myself a special necklace, daddy told me that butterbeer corks work really well with Nargles."

Ginny decided not to enquire further about Nargles. Luna was nice, but sometimes she really sounded crazy.

"So, you would go with Neville?"

"Who is Neville?"

"A fourth year Gryffindor boy," repeated Ginny patiently.

"Is he nice? I don't like it when boys make fun of me."

"Neville is nice, he would never laugh of anyone, I promise."

"All right, then," said Luna, apparently not needing to know anything else about Neville. "Do you think he will like silver? I don't have a red dress, nor golden..."

"Silver is fine, Luna," said Ginny smiling as she focused again on their Puffapod.

About a week later, Ginny was trying really hard not to fall asleep reading a Transfiguration book when someone swearing nearby startled her. Maybe she had began to doze off. When she looked up, she saw that Harry was sitting in an armchair across from her, a very dark expression on his face. He was always in a bad mood these days.

"Sorry, Ginny," he said when he realized that he had startled her (or perhaps woken her up). He seemed to make an effort not to scowl so much and search for some innocent small talk subject to talk about. "Hum... are you going to the ball?"

She felt herself going red at once. Why? Why did she always have to react this way with Harry? It was just a person talking to her, why couldn't she handle it the same way she handled any other human interaction? She wasn't a silly blushing girl with anyone else!

He could swear that Harry almost sighed. Of course, he must be tired of her always blushing and going mute or even running away whenever he said a word to her or simply looked at her. He would never like her if she reacted this way! Just talk back, she urged herself, seeing that Harry gave up on her and looked away, probably to kindly free her from his gaze. Say something, anything!

"I'm not going," she whispered.

Harry looked back at her, searching her eyes as if trying to make sure she had been the one to talk. Was this the first time ever she answered him?

"Oh. Right, you're a third year," he said once he had recovered from the surprize of hearing her voice. "Lucky you."

"Actually, Neville asked me," she said on an impulse, not sure why.

"Well, that sounds nice," said Harry, although Ginny could see in his eyes that "nice" would not be his choice word for anything related to the Yule Ball.

"I said no."

"Why not?" he asked, now looking confused.

"Because..." she felt her face burning. She had always wanted Harry to really look at her, just like now, but apparently she couldn't handle it without catching fire. "Hermione told me that you're forced to go, that the Goblet will kill you if you don't. I realized it was all silly and evil, so I didn't want to go anymore."

Harry's mouth curved in a bitter smile.

"You must be the only sensible person around," he said. "I swear, if I see one more girl batting her eyelashes at me I'm going to start hexing them."

Ginny surprized both of them by laughing. It was a nervous laugh and she stopped at once, but Harry was now staring at her in shock. She definitely had never laughed in front of him.

Now Harry was regarding her thoughtfully.

"I don't suppose you would want to go with me, right?" he asked after a moment.

Ginny's stomach gave a huge jolt. She forgot to breathe, and even to blush. She couldn't hear her own thoughts over the loud beating of her heart.

"I mean, just as friends," Harry rushed to clarify, looking suddenly unsure. "I don't want to give you the wrong idea nor to hurt you, I just... I have to go, and I need a date, and since you think it's silly and evil too maybe it wouldn't be such a bad thing to go together..."

He seemed to be already regretting having asked. Ginny was brutally brought back to Reality. Of course Harry still didn't like her that way, when would she stop being stupid? She was just Ron's little sister, and he was only asking her because he was desperate. Because he would die if he didn't bring a date to the Yule Ball. Because "maybe it wouldn't be such a bad thing" to go with her.

Harry didn't want to hurt her, but it hurt her.

Once she realized nothing had really changed, her first impulse was to just run away to cry in the solitude of her dormitory or maybe in the bathroom. That cowardly impulse was quickly overridden by fear. What if Harry died for not getting a date for the ball? She couldn't say no! Then horror filled her. What if she couldn't say yes? Hermione had been unable when he had asked her help as a friend.

But she was being stupid again. Ginny was hardly Harry's only hope for a date. If he didn't have one already it could only be because he had not asked anyone but Hermione. He obviously didn't want a date at all, angry as he was at the whole thing, but if Ginny said no he would no doubt eventually get over his reluctance and ask someone else. Maybe Cho Chang. If whoever he liked said no, there would still be a hundred girls waiting to be picked.

The question was whether she would let this opportunity pass. No matter the reason, the fact was that Harry had asked her to be his date, something with which Ginny had been dreaming since forever. If she said yes, Harry would hold her hand and dance with her...

"Okay," she said finally in a small voice, blushing furiously.

Harry's mouth dropped open.

"Really? You said yes?" he asked anxiously.

"Yes."

"And are you okay with the just friend thing?"

"Sure, Harry," lied Ginny, trying for a friendly smile. "It will be fun."

Harry made an skeptical face at that, but he looked immensely relieved, as if a huge burden had been lifted from his shoulders. That's how Ginny knew she had made the right decision. It might hurt her to be seen as just a friend by Harry, but she would have deserved to be thoroughly smacked in the head by her entire family if she had not done what she could to help him now.

Not that she had said yes just to help him, of course. But maybe it wasn't a bad thing that she wanted more, since she suspected that was what had allowed her to say yes.

That very night Ginny checked that Parvati and Lavender were busy in the Common Room and then sneaked into Hermione's dormitory. Hermione wasn't exactly her friend, but Ginny didn't really have a girlfriend to confide in, so she had began talking to her when she needed a girl's opinion. Colin was a good friend, but a boy and really dumb sometimes. Ginny had never managed to get along with the other Gryffindor girls in her year (they had pretty much signed her off after her erratic first year), and Luna... well, she was Luna. Hermione might be completely ignorant regarding certain important matters (like Quidditch!), but she was clever and usually gave good advice.

"HarryaskedmetogototheYuleBallwithhimandIsaidyes," she blurted out as soon as the door had closed behind her.

Hermione looked up from the book she had been reading in bed and stared at her at a loss.

"What?" she asked after a moment, closing the book and sitting up.

"Harry asked me to go to the Yule Ball with him and I said yes," repeated Ginny, trying to keep her panic at bay. "He said as friends, and I said I'm okay with that, but I'm not! Was it a mistake? What should I do? I can't take it back or he'll die!"

Multiple different thoughts and emotions seemed to pass through Hermione's eyes before she could even blink once. Ginny recognized amusement, relief, worry and sadness. That was the thing with Hermione: her brain worked so fast that she could contemplate all the different implications of something and process all the emotions associated to them before anyone else could even understand what had been said. She obviously was capable of seeing into the situation a lot more than Ginny was, even though she wasn't part of the situation.

"Calm down, Ginny," she said in a soothing voice, patting the bed next to her and smiling gently. "Come here. Breathe."

Ginny went to her, and before she knew it she was being hugged and comforted by Hermione. Was this how having a big sister would feel like? Ginny loved all her brothers, but sometimes it felt lonely —and exhausting— to be the only girl. She would have liked to have at least one sister.

"Harry will not die if you take it back," said Hermione after a minute, pulling back to look her in the eye. "He would find another date, I'm sure. But why would you take it back?"

"Because it's a lie that I'm fine being just friends!"

"How would you know?" asked Hermione very seriously. "You have never tried to be friends with Harry, Ginny. You don't even know him, not really. And he has never had the chance of getting to know you."

Her words were like needles stuck in Ginny's pride. She didn't want to admit that she might be right, but who did she want to fool? She thought she knew Harry, but... well, maybe she didn't, not really. She only knew things he had done, and what she had seen from a distance or heard from Ron or the twins. The truth was that she had barely ever talked to him, especially since the Chamber... She had been too embarrassed about that, afraid that he might mention it. And it was also true that Harry didn't know Ginny at all. How could he, if she always behaved like a moron whenever he was around?

"This might be a good opportunity for you two to get to know each other and maybe become friends," said Hermione.

"But... I don't want to be just friends," said Ginny miserably.

"Well, that might be all that Harry can be right now, Ginny. I don't think he can handle anything romantic at the moment. And he certainly could use more friends. He doesn't really have a family, you know? So he needs his friends."

Hermione sighed, and Ginny knew that she was thinking about Ron and how stupid he was being. Apparently he had tried to apologize to Harry after the first task, but Harry had been too shocked at the time so the apology had gotten lost in the vacuum and now Ron was being even more stupid by pretending that Harry had to apologize to him. Ginny and the twins had already lectured and smacked him to try and make him get his head out of his ass, but no one could be more stubborn than Ron. And Harry was stubborn too, of course. Ginny had never imagined the fight between them could continue for so long, but apparently there had been issues unrelated to the Triwizard Tournament. If Ron didn't make things right soon, however, he might lose Harry entirely.

Being reminded of Ron's disloyalty made Ginny realize how stupid she was being in her own way. Had she not already come to the conclusion that everything related to the Goblet of Fire was evil and unfair? Harry had called her sensible, but here she was, mentally batting her eyelashes at him, complaining because he didn't want anything romantic with her while he was about to die at every moment. Shame on her!

Hermione was right, as usual: Harry needed his friends. More than that: he needed his family. And Ginny was family first of all. Clearly she had to get her head out of her own ass too.