After this chapter, I'll be posting about 1 chapter per week. I have 16 already written, but I want to stay ahead of posting for as long as I can!
Important: Around Chapter 10, things start getting extra steamy…and FanFiction dot net doesn't really like that kinda stuff. We'll see what I can get away with, but just in case, know that you can also find me on Archive Of Our Own (AO3). Same username, same title!
Back Then: Soul Society, c. 1750 (about 200 years after The Catastrophe)
Deep in the grounds governed by Division 2 sat a small, artificial island surrounded by a wide, deep moat. A single bridge provided access to the island, guarded on either end by members of Soul Society's Stealth Corps - though to the average onlooker it seemed entirely unsecured.
After all, what was the point of a 'Stealth' Corps if one could easily spot its operatives?
The operative crossing the bridge wasn't part of the bridge detail; he never had been. He made his way casually onto the island, taking a deep breath of the pine-scented air while he still could. This wouldn't be a long visit, but he always appreciated the fresh air a little more when he had to come to this place.
Up ahead, a rocky hill sported an entrance to a cave, flanked by guards who made themselves visible upon his arrival. He nodded politely to the black-clad figures, handing his sheathed zanpakuto over along with the few other weapons and potentially dangerous items he kept on his person. The guards gave him a quick pat-down just to be certain that he was entirely unarmed - always sticklers for protocol, just as he'd trained them - before allowing him inside.
He left the sunlight behind as he descended into the cave. The air here was close, dank and chilly in contrast to the mild warmth outside. He made his way purely by feel, knowing every slippery step and jagged protrusion by heart. Another door lay at the end of his path, and upon opening it, he blinked into artificial light.
One of the guards inside looked startled to see him. "Ah - Urahara-san! Are you on duty today?"
"Nah, just paying a visit," Kisuke said, waving him off. "How're things in here today?"
"Pretty quiet for a bunch of maggots," the guard answered. "Though that one'll probably start something later. She's been agitating up a storm again."
Kisuke patted him on the shoulder and walked into the yard. He'd tried many times to get his guards to stop calling the inmates 'maggots,' though considering the place's nickname, that was always going to be an uphill battle.
"Hey, Riku-san," he greeted the female inmate pointed out by the guard. "How're you finding our little facility?"
"Fuck you, Urahara!" the woman snarled, giving him a rude gesture.
"Adjusting well, I see," Kisuke muttered, continuing on. Riku was a recent addition to the so-called 'Nest of Maggots,' apprehended for acting as a Shinigami-for-hire in the outer Rukongai districts. They hadn't caught her in the act, just in negotiations - but that was enough to put her here. She'd become a blemish on the Seireitei's noble reputation, and the Seireitei didn't abide blemishes.
He greeted a few other inmates as casually as if this was a park rather than a detention facility. Most just glared at him; a few cringed away as he passed.
At the other end of the yard was a hallway - one of many that stretched into the deeper, maze-like barracks of the Nest. With a few exceptions, there were no "cells" in the facility, at least none that locked from the outside; the inmates here had free reign so long as they didn't cause much trouble. No one was isolated here.
Well, no one was forced into isolation.
Kisuke turned down a particular hallway, one so well hidden that it was impossible to see until one was directly in front of it. The shadows played tricks on the eye, masking its entry.
After a few more twists and turns, he arrived at his destination: one of the few actual "cells" in the facility. It had a door, though it had long ago been modified to only lock from the inside. That door hung open now. Dim but steady light from the bulb in the ceiling illuminated the small space, revealing its walls to be covered with pictures - drawings made from studying illustrations in books, mostly. There were inked landscapes, sketches of birds and chipmunks, copies of scientific etchings of everything from the natural to the manmade. Most represented of all were images of the night sky, star charts and constellations that formed an artificial window on the low ceiling.
Somewhat ironically, the pictures showed more life than the cell itself, for its inhabitant was nowhere to be seen.
"Kaede-chaaan," Kisuke called into the open cell. "Kaede-chaaaan…rise and shine! It's the day you've been waiting for!"
He took a few steps into the cell. The hard bed was neatly made, the couple of books he'd brought last time stacked on a small desk next to a lantern.
But no Kaede.
"Where'd you go?" he wondered quietly, leaning out of the open door to glance down the hall.
"I'm right here."
Kisuke grinned and spun around. Barely a foot away from him stood a slim girl - well, a young woman now, he supposed. She was on the tall side, with large, almond-shaped eyes set in an oval face, and long, slender limbs. Her hair hung straight around her shoulders; the shadowy hallway made it seem black, belying its deep burgundy hue. She had the look of a creature raised in shadows, her pale gold eyes wide and taking in everything around her, constantly assessing. Though her posture was outwardly relaxed, she gave off the sense of a coiled spring, ready to bolt in a split second.
She'd also almost managed to sneak up on him. Kisuke nodded appreciatively. "Not bad. You're getting better at hiding your reiatsu!"
"Right," Kaede huffed, walking past him. She absent-mindedly rubbed at her wrists, fingers tracing the chain-like patterns of a Kido binding spell. "It had nothing to do with these."
"Actually, no," he said, leaning against the door frame. "I meant it - you're getting better at being stealthy."
She plopped onto her bed and drew her knees into her chest, making her look much smaller and younger than her late-teen appearance suggested. "So what's today?"
"Don't tell me you've forgotten," Kisuke teased. Kaede just started picking at her nails. "That thing you've been asking about for years?"
Her brow furrowed for a second. Then, as though a switch had flipped in her brain, her eyes grew wide and she perked up like an alert meerkat. "They're letting me go to the Academy?"
"Almost." He was quick to hold up his hands when she immediately deflated. "They just need you to do one more test."
Kaede laid her chin on her knees, closing in on herself once again. He couldn't blame her; he'd had to say that exact sentence more times than he cared to recount. It seemed like every time he was sure Central 46 was finally ready to approve Kaede's release, they came up with yet another reason to hold her back, another hoop for her to jump through.
"I mean it this time," he assured her. "You pass this, and you're in."
Her head turned ever-so-slightly toward him, her attention recaptured. "When? What's it on?"
"It's not a written test," he said. "Actually, they agreed to let me determine what it'd be this time."
Kaede's eyes narrowed in suspicion. "And…?"
Kisuke grinned and beckoned. "Well, c'mon, and I'll show you."
He started down the hall, not bothering to check if she followed. He knew she would.
Kaede watched Urahara's back warily as they walked down the dark, winding hallways of the Nest. He said this was the last one, but how many 'last tests' had she had in the past decade alone? Written exams covering history, literature, natural philosophy, and basic Kido theory (though she wasn't allowed to practice)…physical tests to gauge her strength, speed, and dexterity…psychological evaluations, mandatory demonstrations of her reiatsu control despite having no formal training… She passed them all, only to be told that she was deemed "unprepared for interaction with the greater population."
Of course, there was a reason for it all - one she couldn't forget if she tried. Faint memories of the Catastrophe haunted her dreams, though the details grew fuzzier every passing year. There had been other incidents since, and those, she remembered with distressing clarity: limbs reduced to bloody stumps for seemingly no reason, layers of skin flayed away to reveal dripping tissue beneath…the half-disintegrated figure of a man, not quite dead, but barely alive either…
She'd caused all of those things somehow, just as she'd caused five miles' worth of the Rukongai to disappear completely.
It was only thanks to the man in front of her that she hadn't been executed outright for what she'd done. It didn't matter that she didn't mean to hurt anyone; the fact that she had this power and couldn't control it made her dangerous. She needed to be controlled, at least until she was able to safely learn to control it herself.
So she'd go through as many tests as were deemed necessary, no matter how tedious, grueling, humiliating, or painful they were. If it meant the chance to do something good and offset the horrors she'd caused, she'd do anything.
Kaede recognized the route before they reached their destination. They were going to the main "yard" of the Nest, where the inmates spent most of their days. She hadn't been there in a couple weeks; she usually avoided it when she could. Some of the inmates were harmless, even okay to be around, but others - those who'd been in the Nest for too long…
Well, she preferred her solitude to dealing with those people.
They arrived in the yard. Kaede blinked at the sudden brightness of the artificial lighting; when her eyes adjusted, Urahara was nowhere to be seen.
"Eh? Urahara-san…?" Kaede took a few tentative steps into the yard, self-consciously crossing her arms. He was just…gone. What about the test, then? Did he just leave for a minute to set it up? That must be it. She'd just wait here, near the entrance where she could easily dart back into the shadows of the hallway if need be.
The yard was surprisingly crowded today, though the inmates were pretty quiet, immersed in their chosen routines. Most were male, though a few women were clustered together around a crafts table. Chess and dice games were set up around the perimeter as well, the central area left open for people to exercise or - more often the case - wander listlessly until the next scheduled meal time.
A flash of pale blond hair and a black shihakusho caught her eye. Kaede straightened, then darted toward the person - but she lost them almost immediately. Dammit, what was Urahara up to? Just as she was about to slink back toward the entry, a voice stopped her.
"Hey, look who it is!" The speaker - a male inmate whose name she couldn't recall - wore a lopsided grin as he sauntered toward her. "If it isn't the princess the Nest, come out from her tower to grace us with her presence!" He bowed low, a mocking gesture.
Kaede stiffened as more eyes turned on her. This was why she hated coming out here.
"Oy," came a rough female voice from her other side. "Don't you ignore him! What, you think you're better than us?"
"Riku-san," piped a more timid woman from behind the first, "i-is that really a good idea? Isn't that the one who…you know…"
Riku snorted loudly and stood, her chair scraping harshly against the stone floor. Her white inmate's robe was torn at the shoulders to reveal toned arms lined with tattoos. "Please. Who actually believes those stories? I bet you she started those rumors herself just to make herself seem like tough shit. Look at her - she's puny!"
Riku gave her a shove, making Kaede fall back a few steps. Around her, other inmates backed away from her.
"Don't," she said, but her voice barely made it to her own ears.
"Eh? What's that, you got something to say, princess?" Riku sneered. She pushed her again. "I ain't the type to fall for those campfire stories. Way I see it, you're just a spoiled brat who got thrown in here with us common folk for talking back to mommy and daddy. What you need is some good thrashin' - prove to all these idiots that you're no better 'n' the rest of us!"
So Riku was one of those, Kaede thought, watching the woman through her lashes. They popped up in the Nest every few years: newcomers who still had all of their spite and rebellious attitude intact, who hadn't yet succumbed to the depression and madness the Nest engendered in almost everyone. They tried to create a sense of hierarchy and order despite claiming to be against such things - always with themselves at the top, of course.
Not today, Kaede begged silently. Please, just go away. Not today. She'd gone years without any "incidents," but a brawl on the day of a test might ruin her chances of being let out. She glanced around one more time, hoping that Urahara would step in, but even the guards weren't paying close attention. She knew from experience that they wouldn't do anything unless actual violence broke out.
"Hey!" Riku shouted at her. "Don't you act like I ain't here!"
Kaede turned her attention back to the woman. Apparently, she loathed being ignored. How ironic, considering Kaede preferred people ignoring her.
I guess we wouldn't get along very well.
"C'mon, you little bitch!" Riku stepped up to her, moving to push her again. "What, you too scared to get that pretty face marked up?" She pulled back her arm, her hand balling into a fist that flew at Kaede's face.
No avoiding it now. Kaede turned, planting her feet and ducking the woman's punch easily. Reaching up and back, she grabbed Riku's robe, using her continued momentum to throw her to the ground. Riku hit the concrete with a resounding smack. For a second, she lay there stunned.
"Don't touch me," Kaede said quietly, but this time she was sure her voice was heard.
The other inmates had backed farther away, creating a wide perimeter around Kaede and Riku. The latter rolled over and got to her feet, swearing the whole way. "You fuckin' brat-"
She came at Kaede again, but the girl just side-stepped her, delivering a powerful kick to the woman's backside that knocked her face-first into the crowd.
The man who'd spoken first and called her "princess" started a slow clap. "Nice, very nice. Riku-san, something you need to know about our dear princess is that she's the guards' favorite. Got her own little room and everything. What's more, she has something none of us pieces of trash can claim: she's got a chance at leaving this hell hole."
Kaede's jaw tightened. That wasn't supposed to be common knowledge, but somehow, it had long ago gotten around that she wasn't a normal inmate of the Nest of Maggots. Every other resident was here because they'd been deemed dangerous, true, but they'd committed no actual crime. They hadn't gotten the chance - they'd been found out in the planning stages of rebellion, or attempting to desert the Gotei 13, or simply talking a big enough game that they disrupted the peace outside. No crime meant no trial; no trial, no sentence…and no sentence meant no timeline for leaving.
But she did commit a crime, even if she hadn't meant to. She'd done more damage than a whole pack of Hollows. But because she'd been a child, unable to understand or control whatever strange power was inside of her, she'd been granted leniency. She had a chance to leave.
Kaede tried to ignore the man as he circled her, tried to ignore the growing pressure that permeated her body. Please, just stop…
"Well, princess?" The man closed in on her with a leering grin. "Why don't you show us what's so special about you? What is it you do in that little room of yours, hm? Give us some tips." He was close enough that she could smell his rancid breath. "Maybe if we all sucked cock as good as you, we'd get some extra privileges, too."
He was just trying to get a rise out of her, she knew that. She didn't even care about what he was implying - over a century in this place had inoculated her to such vulgar talk. She just didn't like him being so close, drawing so much attention to her, reminding everyone here why she was different.
"Don't touch me," she hissed again, glaring at the man. She could deal with the taunts, but there were too many people here, too many bodies, and the creeping pressure in her center made her nervous.
"Or what?" He leaned in. "You'll melt me, too? I know what those marks are on your arms, princess. You're muzzled."
His hand brushed her arm, and Kaede cracked. Grabbing his hand, she bent the offending appendage back at the wrist until it snapped, then twisted until he fell to his knees with a cry of agony.
She hadn't wanted a fight - but it was better than the alternative. At least she was in control of herself here.
Two shows of violence in such quick succession overrode whatever fear kept the other inmates at bay. First one, then two, then a whole crowd of "dangerous elements" came rushing in to join the frenzied fray. Kaede ducked the first punch, letting the man overbalance and fly past her. Sliding across the floor, she struck out with her foot and swept the next attacker's legs from under him. Spin, rise, strike up with her palm - a nose broken. She turned to check how far the hallway was - too far, too many bodies between there and here.
No time to think. Block that kick, flip the leg - then intercept a strike, jab to the stomach. Grab someone's robe, swing them into another person. Spin, elbow to a face; pivot, same elbow to ribs. Smash a new face into her knee, push that body into yet another.
Her hair was grabbed, her head yanked back. Kaede reached back, grasped the person's arm, her other hand clawing their face. She kicked another attacker, using his body like a wall to launch herself up and backward, flipping over to wrap her thighs around the hair-grabber's neck. She threw her weight back, bringing the grabber to the ground with her.
She got to her feet in a flash, ready for the next attack - but none came. The guards had stepped in at last, pushing the crowds back and away from the main tussle, and she had just taken down the last of the mob. Still, her eyes darted around the yard, her blood rushing through her veins, her breath only slightly elevated. There was no frenzy within her, no more pressure building up, just lazer-sharp awareness.
"Well," she heard Urahara's voice behind her. "I'd say that settles it."
He stood casually just a few feet away as the other guards cleared away the injured around him. Kaede's stomach tightened in anticipation of his disappointment, but he was…grinning? "What…? What about the test?"
"You just took it."
Kaede blinked, then looked around her at the now-subdued inmates. "This was the test?"
"And you passed with flying colors!" Urahara announced with a grin. He led her back to the hallway that went to her cell. "You wouldn't have noticed, but we have some special guests watching today. Don't bother looking, you won't find them. They were sent by Central 46 to evaluate how you'd fare in a period of heightened stress - whether your seals would hold up or not."
Kaede was numb with shock at first. "I was supposed to fight?"
"Well, they had to know how you'd handle one. Heck, I wouldn't be surprised if they put you in an advanced Hakuda class after this little demonstration!"
Hakuda class? The Nest didn't have classes; Urahara himself had trained her over the years. Wait - did he mean…
It took a moment for it to sink in. She'd spent so many years hoping, studying, waiting for the chance to prove she was ready to leave this place. There had been so many false starts, so many different hoops to jump through with no end in sight.
She almost didn't want to ask, in case it turned out not to be true - but her heart already fluttered with hope. "I made it?"
Urahara's smile turned warm and sincere. "You made it. You'll be going to the Shin'o Academy at the start of the next term."
At first, she couldn't feel anything, could barely register the words, much less their implications. This was it? Decades of training, studying, hoping, more denials than she could count…that was over?
"The first year will be provisional," she heard Urahara telling her. "Mandatory checkups will be done at least twice a year for a while until they're satisfied that you're stable, but I wouldn't worry too much about that. You've been ready for a while now, they're just finally seeing - eh? Kaede-chan?"
Kaede had sunk to the floor, too light-headed to stay standing. She covered her eyes with her hands, then touched them to her forehead, her mouth, her cheeks, the pressure helping to ground her as a flood of emotion built up.
"A-are you sure?" she asked, doing her best to hold back the tide in case this was all some sort of trick. "It's really happening? What if they change their minds?"
Urahara crouched down so that his gaze was level with hers. "It's really happening," he said gently, the light in his gray eyes lending credence to his words. "I promise you. You're leaving this place, and if all goes well, you'll never have to come back here again."
The dam broke. Kaede's eyes stung, her breath coming out in something between a laugh and a sob. She almost didn't want to believe it, at least not until she was actually outside, breathing fresh air and feeling the sun on her skin for the first time since…she couldn't even remember. But the idea had already firmly planted itself: she was leaving, she was finally leaving the Nest! She was finally being given a chance to learn to use her abilities for good!
She'd make sure it went well. She'd prove that she was loyal, useful, worthy of being trusted. She would become a Shinigami and, at long last, be able to actually help people, not just in Soul Society, but in the other realms as well. She wouldn't be a burden or a liability ever again.
She hugged herself, rocking and gasping as she tried to rein herself in. Habit had her desperate to hide any overt display of emotion, but there was just so much!
"Hey, now," Urahara said, raising a hand as though to place it on her shoulder or head. His hand froze in the air between them, fingers twitching in before settling on the back of his own neck. "This is good news, right?"
Kaede nodded and hastily wiped at her eyes. "Yeah, yeah it is - sorry, I just…" She put on a smile for him, trying to show that she was, indeed, happy. And she was. She had no idea where all these other feelings were coming from; it almost made her angry to be anything besides joyful right now. She should only be glad, relieved, grateful. "Thank you, Urahara-san."
"Don't thank me," he said with a sheepish grin. "You did all the work, kiddo. You deserve this."
I deserve this, she repeated to herself, testing out the phrase on herself. Then she tried saying it out loud, her mouth stretching into a genuine smile as she did. "I deserve this!"
The following weeks were agonizingly long ones; Kaede was barely able to sleep for the anticipation that charged through her. Urahara took her outside of the Nest once to be fitted for her uniform and once for a mandatory checkup, but aside from that, she remained in the dark, devouring books by lamplight and dreaming of life outside.
When the day finally came, Kaede followed Urahara through the hallways with a pounding heart. The yard, she'd been told, was empty for now - no use in inciting a riot by parading her in front of a bunch of people who'd never get to leave. She felt a little sorry for them, but her own excitement and relief vastly overshadowed any pity. They might not have felt true loyalty to Soul Society, but she would prove herself as an asset.
Just before they reached the yard, Kaede stopped, biting the inside of her lip. "Wait."
Before Urahara could stop her, she darted down another hall. The other inmates never ventured this way; it was the one exception to the rule of 'free reign' in the Nest, the one place that housed the facility's only person in true solitary confinement. She'd only gone down this path once before, and that had only been to confirm for herself that its inmate was truly confined. Still, she remembered each and every turn as she made her way deeper into the earth.
A harsh, bluish bulb glowed in the locked cell, the cold light leaving no place for shadow inside. On the hard, raised surface that served as a bed sat a man - just a man. Not a giant, nor particularly deformed, though his skin seemed to be painted pure white and he sported strange, golden cones where his ears should have been. Yellow eyes and yellow teeth stood against his pale features, his eerie, unblinking stare making him seem almost alien.
He looked up as she approached. "Ah…is that who I think it is? Yes, yes indeed…it's been quite a long time, Kaede-chan. I'm hurt that you haven't come to see me sooner."
Kaede stopped several feet from the cell, her stomach turning at the sound of his nasal voice. "I'm leaving."
The man cocked his head curiously. "Oh?"
Kaede swallowed, forcing herself to speak louder. "That thing you said would never happen? It's happening. I'm leaving, and I'm never setting foot in this place again."
He lifted his chin, his yellow teeth catching the light. "So they've decided to let you attend the Academy? Congratulations. You will exchange one jailer for another." He spoke without any hint of malice or contempt, as though simply stating facts that everyone knew.
Her eyes drifted down to the shackle on his ankle that connected to a heavy, Kido-laden iron ball. "At least I'm not chained up."
His yellow eyes slid to her side. "Aren't you, though?"
Kaede resisted the urge to rub at her wrists. "I'm not like you, I'm not like anyone else here! I can be controlled!"
"Being controlled and being in control are two vastly different things, child," he said. "Mistaking them will only bring you unnecessary suffering. Why go out there, anyway? It may not be the most luxurious, but this place does manage to meet one's basic needs."
"Because I have something to give," she argued, her hands tightening into fists. The pressure started to build in her chest; she took deep breaths to force it back. "They'll see that."
"No, they won't." The response was blunt, absolute. "They never accept or appreciate people like us. At best, we are tolerated. You say you're not like anyone in here, but that's not how the close-minded imbeciles of the Seireitei will see it."
Her knuckles had gone white from how hard she was clenching her fists - but one thought helped her stay calm. "Doesn't change the fact that I'm getting out, and you're going to rot in here, Kurotsuchi Mayuri."
"We'll see, Sorano Kaede," Mayuri drawled, leaning back on his concrete bed. "Say hello to Urahara Kisuke for me."
She turned and fled back to the upper levels. Urahara was waiting for her by the yard's entrance.
"Did what you needed to do?" he asked, the understanding in his gray eyes indicating that he knew exactly what she'd been up to.
Kaede took a deep breath, letting the pressure gather with it - then let it all harmlessly go in an exhale. "Yeah. I'm ready."
So…
We meet a much younger Kaede here, one who's spent her first two centuries in Soul Society locked away. Now she's finally given the chance to become a Shinigami and do some good. But is Mayuri right - will she ever be truly accepted "out there?"
Next time: The Academy isn't what Kaede expected…nor are some of the people she meets there.