I just added this to the first chapter, but for returning readers…some important messages.
First off, a HUGE overdue shout-out to Angela - friend, beta-reader, and practically co-writer of this story. You're awesome and I love and appreciate you!
Second: Some content warnings. There's dark stuff in this story, as you've probably noticed by now. I was a bit hesitant to include warnings on specific topics, as some might be considered "spoilers," but I'd rather spoil a little bit than unintentionally trigger anyone. These warnings are now at the top of the first chapter as well. Returning readers: If any of these will strongly affect you and you don't feel comfortable continuing because of them, I understand, and I apologize for not including this before.
So, content warnings for: childhood trauma and isolation; toxic relationship; emotional manipulation and abuse; gaslighting; self-harm; suicidal ideation; rape (not explicit, not main character); pregnancy and pregnancy termination; torture (much later on); grief; character death(s).
If you're strongly affected by any of those things, this fic might not be for you, and that's okay. Again, I totally understand. I'm not trying to be "dark for dark's sake;" all of this will be part of Kaede's journey, shaping who she is and who she will become. There are plenty of light-hearted, fluffy, and fulfilling moments as well, but the main (romantic) relationship is…complicated.
Lastly, I want to make it clear that the toxicity of the main relationship is NOT okay. Nor is it "balanced out" or "redeemed" by the good moments (and, like all relationships, there are some of those). It's complicated, but it's also fictional, which is perhaps the ONLY so-called "redeeming" quality at play here. If you or someone you know is in a relationship where ANYTHING like the toxic elements of this one happens, THAT IS NOT OKAY. Please take care of yourselves, and for the love of all things in existence, do not idealize Kaede/Aizen or seek to emulate it in real life. I do believe that fiction is the place to explore things like this and indulge in unhealthy, fantastical scenarios, but in no way would I ever condone their relationship in real life. If Kaede were my friend rather than my character, I would be begging her to get the hell out.
That said, if you're still here, I hope you enjoy! Now on with the show.
Hitsugaya studied the strange woman from the corner of his eye as they filed downstairs. He couldn't get a read on her. Her reiatsu was negligible; did Urahara really think she would be of use in a fight against Aizen Sousuke and his army of Arrancar?
Then he thought of how much stronger Aizen was than anyone had previously believed. Appearances aren't everything, he reminded himself.
Down in the vast, underground training area, Urahara clapped his hands to get their attention. "Okay, let's lay down the ground rules for this shindig. It's a six-on-one deal: the six Soul Society representatives against the one mysterious stranger. Now, since I know some of those present don't consider a fight to be over unless someone dies-" His eyes slid to the two Division 11 members. "-we'll make this a contest of 'first blood.' That is, once you bleed, you're out of the fight. Last person standing wins!"
"You mean we're trying to draw her blood," Hitsugaya corrected. "Once that's done, the whole fight is over."
"Exactly!" Urahara answered cheerily. "Now, if you all win, my friend here will answer any and all of your questions." The woman visibly tensed. "Or, if you'd rather, she'll just agree to stay out of the upcoming war. Up to you, really."
"We'll go with getting answers," Hitsugaya said, noting the woman's discomfort with the idea. "And then we'll decide whether she's an ally."
"Of course," Urahara continued, "if she wins…" He tilted his head to look inquiringly at the woman.
She sighed. "Then you'll accept my help without any further questions."
"Whatever," drawled Ikkaku, stepping forward. "Let's just get this thing started! But I ain't doing no six-on-one shit. Oy, Yumichika, you keep the others back 'til I'm done!"
"Very well," sighed Yumichika, examining his nails. "Though I'm not sure what you expect me to do if they seriously try to join in."
"It's fine," Hitsugaya stated, crossing his arms. "Madarame-san can have the first shot." He was more interested in observing for the time being, anyway.
"Yeah!" Ikkaku grinned from ear to ear, reaching for his Zanpakuto. "I'm not usually one to hit a woman, but I'll be sure to hold back so this doesn't end too-"
The crunch of smashed bones made him stop talking - mostly because the bones were in his face. His head snapped back from the force of the powerful forward punch. As he stumbled backward, his hand flew to his nose and mouth; his fingers came away coated in blood.
"One down," said the woman. She flash-stepped back to her starting position before any of them could blink.
Hitsugaya sucked in a sharp breath. He hadn't seen the woman move, and going by the looks on his comrades faces, none of them had, either. He hadn't even felt the telltale flicker of reiatsu that usually accompanied shunpo. Not only that, but it took a lot of strength to cause that much damage to a powerful Shinigami, especially with a single blow.
Clearly, there was more to her than he'd initially thought.
Yumichika stepped forward next. "Such a shame…I was hoping to go third, but I suppose now I'm obligated to take the second spot. After all, I couldn't call myself a true comrade if I allowed Ikkaku's defeat to go unanswered."
"She didn't defeat me!" Ikkaku protested, blood still gushing from his nose. "That wasn't a real fight!"
Yumichika smiled indulgently. "True…no swords were drawn, after all. But, first blood is first blood. Hitsugaya-taicho, if you don't mind, I'd also like to take this one on by myself."
If this had been a real battle, Hitsugaya would've ignored such a mealy-brained request. But considering the low stakes, and the fact that his curiosity was now piqued, he grunted his assent.
The woman simply stood in her original spot, her stance casual, expression almost bored.
"I won't waste anyone's time with posturing," Yumichika said. "However, I don't intend to begin until you draw your sword."
He drew his own Zanpakuto and waited.
The woman's eyes flicked to Urahara, who gave her a slight nod. With a sigh, she reached for her sword's hilt and brought it out.
Immediately, the air filled with spiritual pressure that reverberated like the strike of a gong. Hitsugaya's eyes widened. This feeling…he'd felt strong reiatsu before, but this power challenged the core of his existence, making him feel like one wrong move would make him unravel completely. He was faintly aware that nearby, Rukia had buckled and had to be supported by Renji, while Chad and Orihime both fell to their knees. Only once the initial shock wore off did Hitsugaya realize something that chilled him further:
She hadn't actually released her Zanpakuto - this was just her reiatsu.
Who the hell was she?
To his credit, Yumichika was only stunned for a second or two before he reacted. "Bloom, Fuji Kujaku!"
His sword split from the hilt, fanning out to become four curved blades. The woman's eyes narrowed - then, suddenly, she was directly behind Yumichika, her sword up as though she'd just struck.
"There are two things I hate seeing wasted," she said in a low voice, though just loudly enough that Hitsugaya could hear. "My time, and people's lives. You do both by holding yourself back."
A thin, crimson line appeared on the purple-haired man's cheek. Yumichika raised a shaking hand to his face and felt the blood blooming from the cut, his eyes wide, skin pale.
"Don't worry," the woman added, straightening. "It's a shallow cut, so it won't scar that pretty face. Though maybe you should have to bear a scar as a reminder of what happens when you place the opinions of others above all else."
Hitsugaya wasn't sure what she was talking about exactly, but whatever it was, it seemed to have a strong effect on Division 11's self-appointed fifth seat. Yumichika's arm dropped limp at this side, his Zanpakuto clammering to the ground.
The woman calmly turned around and surveyed the rest of the Shinigami. "Next?"
"Don't get cocky!"
Renji shot forward, sword at the ready. Their blades clanged as they met again and again. Though she was on the defensive, the woman kept up with Renji's onslaught with surprising ease.
"Hado 4: Byakurai!"
The woman leaped back just in time to avoid the dense energy beam. Both she and Renji turned widened eyes on the source of the attack.
"Rukia?!" Renji exclaimed. "What're you-"
"The whole 'one-on-one' thing wasn't an actual rule," Rukia said, fixing the woman with a cool glare. "I appreciate that you brought me help in that previous battle, but that just raises more questions that need answering - so I can't let you walk away from this!"
The woman's expression melted into a smile, her pale gold eyes shining with intrigue. "Glad to see someone's taking this seriously."
"Dance," Rukia called. "Sode no Shirayuki!"
"She's not the only one," Renji growled. "Howl, Zabimaru!"
He whipped his Shikai at the woman, who leaped just out of its range - only to come in the path of another Kido spell shot off by Rukia. She struck one hand out, and a shield of light blocked the Kido attack. With a flick of the same wrist, a beam of energy hurtled toward the petite Shinigami, who dodged while Renji came back with another attack of his own. Zabimaru's whip-like blades sped toward the woman, who made no attempt to dodge.
"Wither," she uttered. "Mono no Aware."
Hitsugaya tensed, his breath catching when he heard the incantation - but he saw nothing happen. No change in her sword's form, even her reiatsu didn't seem altered. Zabimaru kept pummeling toward her, undeterred by anything.
Yet it never reached her.
Hitsugaya blinked hard. To his eyes, the end of Zabimaru had stopped a mere inch from the woman's face - yet the segments were a blur, like they were still moving. Renji's eyes widened as, against all logic, Zabimaru extended to its fullest possible length without seeming to move another centimeter.
"What the…?"
"First Truth," the woman said, as though in explanation. "All is Void."
"First Dance," Rukia responded. "Tsukishiro!"
A glowing circle appeared around the woman's feet, and in an instant, a pillar of ice shot up from ground to ceiling. Hitsugaya's eyes narrowed. If the woman was really caught inside, then they wouldn't need to draw blood - she'd be frozen solid.
The ice shattered - but rather than shatter with it, the woman stood completely unscathed.
"How…?" Rukia trailed off, leaping back to put extra distance between her and their opponent. "I had her…I'm sure I did…"
"Your Zanpakuto can freeze whatever it touches," the woman commented, making no move to attack them. "And his-" She nodded to Renji. "-is a pretty straightforward melee-type. Both rely on contact with their target in order to be effective; that's the problem." She smirked at him. "You. Can't. Touch. Me."
Renji ground his teeth. "Don't be so sure of that! Bankai: Hihio Zabimaru!"
The undulating, serpentine body of his Bankai filled the arena, the jaw opening wide to release an ear-piercing shriek as it bore down on the woman. She rolled her eyes and leaned back against a boulder as Zabimaru seemed to hit some sort of barrier inches away from her face.
"Like I said," she called out over the noise of Zabimaru's screeching. "You can't touch me."
Renji's eyes narrowed - and then he directed Zabimaru around the woman to crash through the rock she was leaning against. A look of annoyance crossed her face as her footing faltered. She leaped away as Zabimaru began coiling around her.
"Second Dance: Hakuren!"
In the few seconds the woman had been occupied with Renji, Rukia had set up her next attack. An avalanche of frigid air sped toward her opponent, who, in midair, had no means of dodging. She could stop - stall? - something as large and solid as Zabimaru, but what about air?
"Hado 31," replied the woman. "Shakkaho."
A fiery red orb began on the tip of the woman's finger, then fanned out to meet the oncoming cold front. For a second, the two clashed and seemed equal in force, the heat of the Hado spell turning the Ice-based attack to steam.
Hitsugaya had to admit: he was impressed. Shakkaho was the default offensive spell for most Shinigami, usually taking the form of a ball of fiery reishi. She was showing both her resourcefulness and her control by using it defensively. Kisuke's "old friend" was clearly experienced in combat; it took sharp focus and quick thinking to pull off such a perfect counter in the middle of a fight.
Then the steam spread out, and Hitsugaya realized what the woman really intended.
"Watch it," he yelled. "She's using the steam as cover!"
"Second Truth," he heard her say from within the steam. "All is Impermanent."
Two clangs rang out in succession, the sound of metal meeting metal. Zabimaru let out another shriek - but then Hitsugaya heard its many segments crash to the ground. By the time the steam cleared, Renji was holding a plain katana in his hand with a look of utter shock on his face. A quick glance to Rukia told the captain that she, too, held not the all-white Shikai form of Sode no Shirayuki, but its more mundane sealed form.
Then Hitsugaya saw something else that made his blood run cold: both Renji and Rukia now sported a tear in their shihakusho sleeves - and through the fabric, a bit of blood was visible.
The woman was nowhere to be seen.
Hitsugaya tensed. "Rangiku!"
"Hai! Growl, Haineko!"
His lieutenant's blade dissolved and surrounded the two of them in a cloud of fast-moving, microscopic razors. At the same time, Hitsugaya focused his senses. She was obviously good at hiding herself, having sneaked into their meeting unnoticed by anyone but Urahara and Yoruichi. Given that, her speed, and her patterns of attack, he strongly suspected she had training as an assassin. She was no stranger to direct combat, either - her reflexes and focus spoke of experience. That couldn't be faked, no matter how strong a person was.
"This woman is dangerous," he muttered to Rangiku. "I don't care what Urahara-san claims; she needs to be taken in."
"Yes, sir," Rangiku replied, her sharp blue eyes watching for the next attack. The moment their opponent showed herself or tried to attack, she'd be surrounded by Haineko's ash.
Hitsugaya realized the mistake just before it happened: In a blink, the woman was in sight. As planned, Rangiku surrounded her with a cloud of miniscule blades, a triumphant smirk on her lips. Before Hitsugaya could bark out a warning, the woman had charged directly at his lieutenant, coated in Haineko's ash - ash that wouldn't actually touch her own skin.
In her shock, Rangiku only just blocked the ensuing strike of the woman's hand - but the damage was done anyway. His lieutenant's sleeve was shredded instantly by her own Shikai; blood blossomed from her arm barely a second later.
As quickly as she'd appeared, the woman had again vanished.
Hitsugaya's jaw clenched. He had seen enough. "Sit upon the frozen heavens, Hyorinmaru!"
He immediately surrounded himself in a barrier of ice. She was fast, resourceful, and extremely dangerous in close combat. Her Shikai could protect her from physical attacks; simply striking head-on wasn't going to work.
"Another Ice-type?" the woman mused as he considered his options. "You saw how effective the last one was, right?"
Oh, he had - but he wanted to test something out. He slashed through the air, sending the ice dragon hurtling toward her. She leaped out of the way. Hyorinmaru pursued her, but again, she only sought to avoid it. Hitsugaya created two more dragons, making them work together to corral her in a set area. All the while, he set up his next trap.
"Rokui Hyoketsujin!"
Five snowflake-shaped ice crystals formed a pentagon on the ground around her. On his command, five lines of ice raced toward the woman, encasing her in a frozen pillar.
"Got you," he said, addressing the frozen figure. "Your ability defends against physical attacks - as you said to Renji before, you can't be touched. But you can be trapped."
Within the pillar, the woman's pale gold eyes lifted to meet his teal ones. The ice immediately around her cracked, then shattered - but left the surrounding pillar intact. She'd created a pocket inside, allowing her to move freely. But rather than try to escape or use her Zanpakuto, she simply reached into her jacket and pulled out a…notebook and pen?
"Interesting display of reiatsu control," Hitsugaya commented. "But like I said: this is checkmate. You have nowhere to go, and no way to strike me."
"If your assessment of my Zanpakuto is correct," she replied from within the column, "then I'm indeed in a precarious position. But tell me: what do you think my power is?"
He frowned. "I just said-"
"I asked what it is," she interrupted, sketching something in the notebook, "not what it's doing. If I followed the same logic regarding your Zanpakuto - Hyorinmaru, was it? - I'd say that all it does is trap people in ice. It's obviously an Elemental-type, though even that's a bit misleading, isn't it? Your Zanpakuto is more of a conduit for what's really your nature. There've been plenty of theories saying that the more powerful the individual, the more their Zanpakuto becomes a reflection of the nature of their spirit energy. Not a bad theory, in my experience." Her pen paused on its path. "Tell me…when you were younger, did you ever have issues controlling your reiatsu?"
Hitsugaya's breath caught. For a second, he was a younger, scrawny kid in the Rukongai, plagued by dreams of frozen tundras and dragons made of ice. In his sleep, his reiatsu would leak out around him, chilling the air and nearly freezing his adoptive grandmother to death.
How could she know?
The woman's almond eyes flicked up to take in his reaction, then returned to her notebook. "Seems like. Your reiatsu is incredibly potent, to the point that it manifests as cold. Hyorinmaru takes that and focuses it, letting you freeze and control any surrounding moisture. I'd bet that it could even affect the weather in some circumstances. Gotta say, I'd love to see what the Bankai is capable of."
"None of this changes your situation," Hitsugaya said, shaking off the uncanny feeling of being dissected.
"No, it doesn't," she agreed. "But you haven't answered my question: What do you think my Zanpakuto's nature is?"
Hitsugaya's eyes narrowed. Aside from what he'd already postulated, he honestly wasn't sure anymore.
The woman waited another second for him to answer, then said, "Since you've been so obliging in letting me see your abilities, I'll explain some of mine. How many decimal places are there between 0 and 1?"
Hitsugaya blinked. "What does that have to do with anything?"
"Everything," she answered. "So?"
"Theoretically," he replied, "an infinite number."
"So if, say, I'm at point 0, and you're at point 1, there's theoretically an infinite amount of space between us."
"But there isn't," Hitsugaya argued. "There's a set amount of space."
"That's one model of how the universe works," she conceded. "But there are others that suggest that even when we think two objects are touching, there's actually still an infinitesimal amount of space between them - a void, if you will. They never truly meet."
Hitsugaya thought then of how Hyorinmaru seemed to stop inches away from the woman, yet felt like it was still moving toward her at full speed. "So your Zanpakuto…it works on that model, creating a void between you and another object. That object could be moving toward you forever and never reach you…"
You. Can't. Touch. Me.
She cracked a small smile. "Top of the class."
That was why she seemed unaffected by the ice surrounding her. The fact that she'd broken the innermost layer of it spoke to her strong reiatsu, but perhaps that strength was now limited because it was focused on her Zanpakuto's ability.
Hitsugaya frowned. Then how did she take down Abarai and Kuchiki? Their Zanpakuto had mysteriously sealed themselves…or had she done that somehow?
"Your 'Second Truth,'" he started, working through it in his head, "'All is Impermanent' - did you do something to their Zanpakuto?"
"Shikai and Bankai aren't permanent states," she replied with a shrug. "If they were, we'd keep them that way all the time."
He took that as chilling confirmation that yes, she had been responsible for reverting his comrades' swords to their sealed states. She must have gotten to them while concealed by the steam, nicking their arms in the same move.
"You have to make contact with your opponent's Zanpakuto in order to seal it," he surmised. "That's why you haven't gotten mine yet. That, or you can't use both 'Truths' simultaneously, and you've had to focus on defense."
She smirked. "Or maybe I just wanted to chat for a bit. So: what does all of this tell you about my reiatsu's nature?"
A low, irritated growl escaped his throat. He was really getting tired of this game…but she wasn't the only one who could play. "To be honest, I'm not sure. But this whole thing has told me a bit about you."
He pointed Hyorinmaru's blade in her direction. "You are - or were - a Shinigami, or at least, you studied in Soul Society. Your knowledge of Zanpakuto theory and your snide comments about Division 11 make that much clear. You're also a fugitive, like Urahara-san - perhaps falsely accused, as he was. Coming to us - a Captain, two lieutenants, and three seated members of the Gotei 13 - is a risk for someone in your position; we could easily turn you in rather than accept your help. That tells me that you likely were falsely accused, or your crimes would be forgiven should you help take down a bigger threat. My money is on false accusation with Aizen being the person behind it, hence why you're offering your help against him."
The woman began clapping slowly. "Nice assessment, Captain-chan…but I'm afraid only one or two points were actually correct. Still, given what you had to work off of, very nicely done. You're also correct that I can't use First and Second Truth simultaneously; I have to switch back and forth between them, and that does get rather clunky. However…"
She laid a hand on her hilt. "Third Truth: All Is Between."
The ice turned to vapor around her. Hitsugaya immediately backed away, but she made no move to pursue him; instead, she simply slashed her sword through the air in front of her.
Two things happened in quick succession: First, Hyorinmaru disappeared, returning his Zanpakuto to its sealed state. Then he felt something drip down the front of his neck. No - it was impossible, how could she have…? But his fingers came away wet with his own blood.
The woman sheathed her sword. "You're out."
Hitsugaya probed at the cut on his neck. It was shallow, exactly as deep as it had to be to draw blood but no more. The skill and precision that took…and she hadn't even moved, he was sure of it! No one was that fast with shunpo, not even the famous Shihoin Yoruichi! So…did she really do that from such a distance?
That First Truth…it infinitely expanded space between her and a target, but perhaps…could it also do the opposite? And that last move, the Third Truth…did that mean she was able to use the First and Second abilities simultaneously?
Either way, he thought with a sinking feeling of dread, she could have easily ended this whole spar in the first few seconds - but she hadn't. She'd drawn this out, perhaps in order to gather intel on their individual abilities, something that suggested a keen mind for battle tactics.
Who the hell was this woman, and why had no one heard of her before?
Another clap rang out across the field, and Urahara came toward them with a wide grin. "Quite the show! It took longer than I expected, though - you really are rusty, aren't you, Kaede-chan?"
The woman - Kaede - ignored him, instead bowing to Hitsugaya. "Taicho - thank you for the fight, and for allowing me to experience your Shikai. I know what it's like to have a power that's difficult to control, so I appreciate you using yours."
She spoke without any hint of irony or mockery, but rather with what sounded like true sincerity.
Between Urahara's casual attitude about this whole thing and her knowing far too much for his comfort, Hitsugaya was bristling with the need to reestablish some sense of order. "If this had been a real fight-"
"If this had been a real fight," the hat-wearing man interrupted, his eyes glittering dangerously from beneath the striped brim, "none of us would be standing right now."
Hitsugaya was about to retort when he noticed something about the man's choice of words: None of us. Was he really implying that, had this woman gone all out, everyone in the vicinity would be incapacitated?
Or worse?
"Anyway!" Urahara opened his fan and waved it in front of his face. "I think the results speak for themselves. We can accept Kaede's help without further interrogation, yes?"
Hitsugaya was hardly ready to let go of his dozens of questions about her, but he forced himself to set them aside for the moment. Something just…wasn't fitting, like he was missing a key piece of a puzzle and without it, the picture was inscrutable.
Tonight, he thought as the group dispersed. He'd get his answers tonight from -
"Ah, Hitsugaya-kun!"
He stopped, his fists balling at his sides. "Taicho. Hitsugaya-taicho."
"Right, right, taicho," Urahara grinned, waving his fan dismissively. "May I have a word in private?"
With a scowl, he obliged, following the man into a storage room. Before the door closed, he caught Rangiku's eye, exchanging a quick look with his lieutenant. She nodded in understanding - she would keep the woman, Kaede, occupied nearby until he was done.
"Now," Urahara began after closing the door and yanking on a thin chain attached to a bulb. "I imagine you're -"
He yanked again, then again. The bulb remained dark.
"Mah," the shopkeeper groaned, reaching up to check the fixture. "Tessai really needs to check on these more often…ah! There we go."
"What is it, Urahara-san?" Hitsugaya pressed as a dim, warm light filled the small room.
"I imagine you're curious about our mysterious guest," he replied. "In fact, I'd bet you're thinking something like, 'Tonight, I'll get answers about who she is from Soul Society!' Right?"
This man had a truly uncanny sense of clairvoyance. "Fugitive or not, they have a right to know that such a person is here in the Human World."
"You're right that she's not a fugitive," Urahara said lightly. "Though if you tell Soul Society about her, she will be."
Hitsugaya's lip curled. "So she's a deserter?"
"Like many things in life and death…it's complicated." Urahara brought his fan up in front of his lips. "Let's make a deal: I'll satisfy your curiosity by telling you exactly what you'd find in Soul Society's records about one Sorano Kaede, and you will hold off on mentioning her to anyone back in the home base just yet."
Hitsugaya's eyes narrowed in suspicion. "You say you'll tell me what I'd find in Soul Society's records. How do I know you'll be honest, or that there even is anything in their records? I could agree to this only to have you say that there's nothing to be found."
"True," Urahara mused. "But I promise you, there is something to be found, and by the time I'm finished telling you about it, I think you'll understand my request a little better."
"And if I refuse?"
"Then you'd risk wasting what might be our most powerful advantage in the upcoming war."
Every part of the child-sized captain rebelled against the notion of allowing a deserter to pass unnoticed by Soul Society. Deserters may as well be all-out traitors; they abandoned their posts, leaving others to clean up their messes at best. They were also liabilities, walking troves of sensitive information that could be used against Soul Society - and this woman was strong. If she'd been around when Aizen first betrayed Soul Society…but he couldn't dwell on such "what ifs." He had to deal with what was in front of him here and now.
"Fine," he said, crossing his arms. "Tell me, and I'll consider whether Soul Society needs to know about her just yet."
"They'll learn about her eventually, not to worry," Urahara said dismissively. "But thank you, Hitsugaya-taicho. I think you'll see the wisdom in your decision soon enough."
As the Shinigami prepared to go their separate ways, Kaede made her way toward the shop's exit, eager for solitude. Physically, she was still buzzing from the spar. It had been so long since she'd flexed her reiatsu or used her Zanpakuto; doing so felt…better than she'd expected. Mono no Aware had answered her call without hesitation, and that old sense of calm, cool clarity had returned as soon as the fight began.
Yet at the same time, something just felt…off. There was a disconnect, a feeling of separation from her power despite how easy it was to use it again. Like she'd been apart from her own body the whole time.
Maybe she really was just rusty when it came to using her Zanpakuto.
Maybe it was some sort of psychosomatic thing. For all that she'd put on a face of nonchalance, she'd been more tense and wary in the last hour than she had been in several decades. Heck, facing down a miniature army of human-trafficking drug lords in the backwaters of Brazil with only her hand-to-hand combat skills hadn't been as psychologically taxing as this morning had been. She was ready for a quiet walk in nature and a cup of hot tea.
"Ah - Kaede-san, was it?"
The universe was not on her side today. Kaede turned to see the buxom, blond lieutenant coming toward her with a friendly smile. "Yes…and it's Matsumoto Rangiku, right? Lieutenant of Division 10, under Hitsugaya Toshiro?"
"That's right!" Rangiku replied brightly. "I suppose Urahara-san gave you a run-down of who we are. That was quite a spar, wasn't it?"
Kaede inwardly tensed but kept her outer countenance as relaxed as she could. So the lieutenant was here for information…that much was obvious. She couldn't expect the Soul Society Shinigami to just leave her alone, especially after the display downstairs. "Is there something you want, Matsumoto-san?"
The blond flapped her hand. "Oh, please, call me Rangiku! And yes, there was something I wanted to ask you."
Here went nothing.
"Where'd you get that jacket?"
Kaede blinked in confusion. "Sorry?"
"Your jacket!" Rangiku gushed, examining the article with wide, sparkling eyes. "It's marvelous! Classic yet a bit edgy, really gives you a sort of 'mysterious' vibe, you know?"
Kaede fingered the soft black leather. "Oh…um…thanks."
"I've been meaning to do some shopping while we're here in the Human World," Rangiku continued. "It's so much cheaper here than in Soul Society! And there are so many cute styles these days!" She brought a finger to her chin as though she'd just had a brilliant idea. "I know! We should have a girls' day out - you, me, maybe even Orihime-chan and Rukia-san! Let the boys do their brooding and training while we get some well-deserved retail therapy in!"
Kaede took a small step back. "Matsumoto-san-"
"Rangiku, please!"
"Matsumoto-san," Kaede insisted. "If you have something to ask me, just ask. I reserve the right to not answer, as per the terms of the spar, but I'd rather you be direct with your intentions."
Rangiku sighed. "A shame, a shopping trip actually did seem fun…but if you'd prefer, then I will say it outright: What are your intentions in joining the fight against Aizen Sousuke?"
"Already told you. Protecting this town."
"Actually, you said that your reasons are your own," Rangiku corrected, crossing her arms.
"And so they are," Kaede replied evenly. "Look…Matsumoto-san, I have no argument with you, nor do I wish for one, so let's just leave it at that. I appreciate the offer of a shopping day, but not if it comes with an interrogation."
"Where did you get that jacket, then?" the blond asked again. "I'm genuinely curious."
Kaede sighed and thought back. If it meant getting the woman off her case…fine, a little hint about her lifestyle wasn't a tall order. "Italy. A few years back. Little shop in the countryside run by a girl who wanted to move to the city to study fashion."
"Italy?" Matsumoto's crystal blue eyes went round. "That's so chic! So you travel a lot, I take it?"
Kaede opened her mouth to give a curt answer, but was cut off by a sharp tug of her nerves. Without thinking, she whirled around, catching the blade of Rangiku's captain with her bare hand.
"Taicho?!" Rangiku reached for her own blade, though she hesitated to draw it. "What's-"
Hitsugaya trembled with rage, his teal eyes wide and feral as they locked with Kaede's pale amber ones. In a flash, Kaede had an idea of what had provoked this sudden attack. "So he told you…"
Hitsugaya growled and withdrew, keeping his sword pointed at her. Kaede let her arms drop at her sides, unthreatening but wary. She was a bit disappointed in Urahara, but then again, the agreement was only that she wouldn't have to answer questions.
"Told him…?" Rangiku glanced between the two, confusion evident on her face. "Told him what-"
"Who you really are," Hitsugaya snarled at Kaede.
"What the hell's goin' on-"
"Hitsugaya-taicho?!"
The other Shinigami, along with Chad and Orihime, had gathered, drawn by the commotion. Rangiku's mouth set in a tight line. "Taicho. What's this about?"
"She's married to him," Hitsugaya exclaimed. "Aizen! She's his wife!"
Kaede tensed as she felt all of their eyes shoot to her, felt the shock and accusation aimed at her.
The Shinigami reacted in a flurry. Ikkaku and Renji both whipped out their swords, flanking Kaede in an attempt to cut off her escape routes.
"Wait!" called Orihime from the edge of the room. "Shouldn't we let her explain-"
Her voice was drowned out by the Shinigami, all of whom tried to demand something of Kaede at once. She stayed where she was, completely still, neither retaliating nor trying to escape.
"Don't move-"
"Is this true?!"
"Silence!" commanded Hitsugaya. He'd stopped trembling from anger, but his icy stare never left Kaede's form. "By the laws of Soul Society, I hearby bind you for questioning. Any attempt to resist-"
"-would be a bad idea for all sides." Kisuke appeared at Hitsugaya's side and casually used his cane to lower the captain's sword. "Not to mention would probably cause some serious damage to the shop, so I must ask you all to calm down. Please keep in mind that Kaede is here on my invitation and is under my protection, and that while I am happy to assist Soul Society as needed, as per my agreement with Yamamoto-taicho, this shop is neutral ground. Soul Society has no authority here."
Kaede's chest clenched as she listened. Kisuke may have been right to exercise his authority, but he was putting his own freedom on the line by making such a demand…and he was doing so for her.
"But she-"
"Kaede left Aizen over a century ago," Kisuke spoke over Hitsugaya's protests. "I assure you, she has no part in his plans."
"Yes and no." Kaede forced the words from her throat. Kisuke was right, but it wasn't the whole truth. "I left him and want nothing to do with him. But it's not true that I had no part in him getting to where he is now."
Kisuke looked at her with a bit of surprise and even a small bit of concern. "Kaede…"
"They should know who they're dealing with," she stated. "I get that now. They should know what I bring to the table, and that means they should know what I did."
Hitsugaya's grip tightened around his Zanpakuto's hilt, but he seemed to have reined in his rage for the moment. "And what exactly did you do?"
"I…" She had to unstick her tongue from the roof of her mouth and clear her dry throat. "I created the Hogyoku."
NOTES
For anyone curious, here's a rundown of Kaede's Shikai, the Threefold Truths. They're very loosely based on a concept in Japanese Buddhism of the same name.
First Truth: All is Void. There are two parts to this power: offensive and defensive. Offensively, Kaede can infinitely shorten the distance between her blade and another object, allowing her to cut a target from any distance so long as she can sense them (as we saw her do in Hueco Mundo). Defensively, she can infinitely increase that distance by exploiting the whole "infinite decimal places" concept. Kaede cannot use both aspects at the same time, but she can switch between them quite rapidly.
Second Truth: All is Impermanent. Exploits the "truth" that nothing is static or eternal. By striking something with her blade, Kaede can influence that thing's state of being - such as reverting a Zanpakuto to its sealed state. It DOES require direct contact, as well as Kaede's own understanding of that thing's states. Therefore, if she hasn't seen a Zanpakuto's sealed state, she wouldn't be able to revert it to such. It can also work on Kido, forcing the spell to run out before it affects her, but again, requires her sword to make contact with the energy.
Note: The actual "second truth" in Buddhism is closer to "all is conditioned," meaning that all things exist, well, conditionally. Nothing exists completely independently, and all things are affected by all other things. Something like that. My own understanding is still pretty surface-level.
Third Truth: All is Between. Or rather, both 1st and 2nd Truths exist simultaneously. The Buddhist version of the 1st and 2nd truths can seem, on the surface, to be mutually exclusive; the 3rd truth negates that, highlighting that these seemingly contrary realities are both true. Simply put, normally, Kaede can't use 1st and 2nd truths together - until she activates the 3rd Truth. Then, she can spam both at will.
Limitations: She must activate the 3 truths in order - that is, she can't go straight to 3rd truth when she activates Shikai - and she must use at least one aspect of each truth before releasing the next. (She can switch between 1st and 2nd once both have been properly activated, but it does take a lot of concentration.) With 3rd Truth especially, Kaede must be extremely focused to maintain control; she can only use these powers intentionally, not reflexively. So, it's possible to get around these abilities if she's overwhelmed.
So yeah, the Soul Society crew kinda screwed themselves by attacking solo and in pairs. As we've seen already, even before she had Mono no Aware, Kaede's an old hand at fighting crowds :P
Coming soon in Mono no Aware: We travel back to the past to see how Kaede helped Sousuke lay the foundations of his eventual betrayal. Early experiments in Hueco Mundo, espionage in Soul Society…we'll meet some more familiar faces, including two of Aizen's future followers…and eventually, see the creation of the Hogyoku.
Next Time: Opportunities. Kaede and Sousuke experiment in Hueco Mundo, and we get a peek at their domestic life…then Kaede gets an assignment that brings to them a game-changing opportunity. There will be slight spoilers for the "Can't Fear Your Own World" novels.
Let me know what you think, and as always…
Stay Tuned!