Chapter 67
Remus wondered if Sirius had felt this humiliated last year every time he had sneaked into Hogwarts like a common thief. He must have. And his degradation no doubt had been mixed up with the fear, anger and depression that being hunted by a horde of Dementors eager to suck his soul for a crime he hadn't committed would instil in any person.
Compared to Sirius' plight, this was nothing, he told himself as he emerged from the Whomping Willow and pressed the knot to freeze the branches. His eyes reflexively scanned the night sky as soon as he was out in the open, searching for that hateful orb that ruled his life, and breathed in relief when he didn't find it even though he had already known it wouldn't be there.
New moon.
If only Remus could Vanish the damned thing and enjoy an equally clean sky the entire month. He wondered if even knowing the moon was forever gone he would ever cease to be afraid.
He was about to start walking towards the castle when flashes of light in the distance caught his attention. His first thought was that perhaps Hagrid was attending to some injured creature, but no, that wasn't the orange glow of a lantern, and it wasn't the bluish brightness of a Lumos charm either.
It was spellfire. Red, white, yellow beams of light crossing the darkness in opposite directions and occasionally exploding against what must be shields or perhaps targets. Probably some midnight duel between students who had been smarter than choosing the Trophy Room as battlefield.
Remus hesitated. He wasn't a teacher anymore, it was no longer his duty nor his privilege to look after the students, be it to protect them or to punish their mischief. He had only come to meet with Dumbledore, and the fact that he had been instructed to sneak into Hogwarts like a thief in the middle of the night suggested that the Headmaster didn't want Remus to interact with anyone during his visit.
But what if someone was in danger? He had already come to the conclusion that Hogwarts wasn't such a safe place as it was supposed to be, and clearly whatever wards Dumbledore might have raised didn't prevent outsiders from sneaking in using the secret passages. With Voldemort gaining strength and the treacherous Peter on his side the possibility of Hogwarts being under attack wasn't so farfetched, and whatever was going on by the lakeshore looked more like a small battle than a simple duel, so how could Remus turn away? Especially considering that Harry had the habit of wandering after curfew and stumbling into deadly situations every year...
Making up his mind, Remus changed course and all but ran towards the lights, taking a roundabout so he would approach the conflict from a side and have an opportunity to assess the situation and decide whom to back up before his presence was noticed. His heart was racing, his body charged with adrenaline while his mind kept being assaulted by flashbacks of the last war. Knowing that he needed to calm down and keep his head about him if he was to be of any help, he slowed down when the sounds of the confrontation first reached his ears and walked the rest of the way through the trees cautiously. A glance back confirmed that he could no longer see the castle, which meant that no one from the castle could see what was going on here either. Maybe he ought to send a Patronus to Dumbledore? Telling himself that it might be just a silly duel between students, he decided to gather more information before raising the alarm, and so he quietly stepped at the edge of the copse he was currently hiding in and took in the scene displayed before him.
There definitely was a confrontation in progress, two duellers on each side fighting in earnest but mercifully not with murderous intent as far as he could tell —at least none of the flashes of light were green. As it was a moonless night he could only catch glimpses of the fighters' features when some spell temporarily broke through the darkness, but the short stature of one of them told him that there was at least one student amongst them, and Remus wasn't surprized when the bluish brightness of a Protego shield suddenly revealed the student to be no other than Harry.
Remus' first impulse was to immediately jump forward to protect the kid, but something stopped him. Probably the awareness that it could do more harm than good to distract someone when duelling, especially if it was dark and it was hard to recognize the intruder. Besides, Harry had someone else fighting alongside him —a tall girl with blond hair— and they seemed to be holding on well. Furthermore, Remus was almost sure that one of Harry's opponents was Cedric Diggory, and he just couldn't imagine that noble Hufflepuff seriously hurting anyone.
Thoroughly confused, he just stood there watching for several minutes while he tried to make sense of the situation. The only reason he could think of for Harry and Cedric to be fighting each other was Quidditch —he remembered the match in which Cedric had caught the snitch while Harry was falling down to an ocean of Dementors—, but somehow neither of the boys struck Remus like the sort to get into a fight over a game. And there was also the question of who where the other two duellists, and of why weren't Ron and Hermione the ones backing Harry up.
"AÏE!" cried the girl suddenly when she failed to block or dodge a spell sent by the other unidentified fighter. "YOU CUT ME!"
The girl let out a string of French expletives, adding a whole new level of mystery to the situation, but Remus was more concerned by the escalation of danger that the use of a Severing Charm meant. Before he could decide to do anything, however, the distracted girl was hit by another spell and fell backwards to the ground, unmoving.
"CEASE FIRE!" shouted Harry in a strong, commanding voice that made Remus shudder.
Cedric had already ceased fire, and for a moment Remus felt sure that the other duellist would obey Harry's command —the confrontation was beginning to take the shape of a friendly sparring—, but instead Harry found himself having to defend against several spells in a row.
"I SAID CEASE FIRE! DAMN YOU, KRUM, STOP!"
"YOU CAN'T ASK YOUR ENEMY TO STOP ATTACKING YOU, POTTER!" shouted his opponent, and Remus was surprized again when he noticed a different foreign accent.
"WE'RE NOT REALLY ENEMIES, YOU IDIOT!"
"WOULD YOU ASK A DRAGON TO CEASE FIRE?" yelled the foreigner sending a jet of actual fire towards the kid.
"YOU STUNNED FLEUR AFTER CUTTING HER, SHE'LL BLEED OUT!" roared Harry as he evaporated the flames with an angry wave of his wand.
"I KNOW WHERE I CUT HER, SHE'S FINE! BUT IN THE MAZE SHE MIGHT BE BLEEDING OUT FOR REAL, SO YOU BETTER DEAL WITH ME FAST IF YOU WANT TO SAVE HER! DIGGORY, PRESS ON!"
"YOU STAY OUT, CEDRIC!" yelled Harry furiously. "KRUM HAS LOST IT!"
"YOU ARE LOSING, POTTER!" shouted back the one called Krum, and Remus could swear there was amusement in his rough voice. "YOU SHOULD HAVE BACKED UP FLEUR BETTER, NOW IT'S TWO AGAINST ONE! DIGGORY!"
After a brief hesitation, Cedric rejoined the assault against Harry, who continued swearing at them both while he blocked or dodged their spells as best he could, plainly trying to slowly make his way towards the unconscious girl as he did so. Remus stood watching with his wand loosely gripped, rooted to his place even though he was also worried about the bleeding girl and felt a strong urge to help. He was shocked and awed by the level of skill and power that Harry was displaying —the boy was only fourteen, and yet all his hexes and shields were non-verbal and strong enough to present a worthy opposition to his older adversaries. And he was so fast. Two on one seemed to be too much for him, though, and it was evident that his concern for the girl was distracting him.
"ENOUGH!" yelled Harry when his attempt to reach his fallen comrade was thwarted for the third time by the enemy fire. "I SURRENDER."
He threw his wand aside as he said the words and opened his arms as if inviting his opponents to curse him. Cedric immediately lowered his wand, and after a brief hesitation the other also accepted the surrender, although with a disapproving huff. Harry wasted no time to collect his wand and run towards the French girl, calling to the others for help.
"No," said the foreign wizard when Cedric moved to answer the call, "let Potter handle it."
"But-"
"Fleur is in his team, he has to assist her."
Perhaps Remus should have approached then, but he remained where he was, silently watching as Harry tended to the girl and trying to wrap his mind around everything he had seen and heard in the last minutes. He was beyond curious as to who the two unidentified duellists were, and more than a little chilled by the harshness of the one named Krum even if he didn't seem really hostile.
The girl turned out to be, indeed, fine, although she was also really cross and the first thing she did when Harry rennervated her was to continue swearing in French, to which her adversary replied with what also seemed to be insults in some sort of Slavic language. Bulgarian, assumed Remus, wondering since when Hogwarts and Durmstrang were in good enough terms to exchange students and feeling even more concerned. He knew that Igor Karkaroff was the Headmaster of Durmstrang, and after Voldemort's downfall there had been rumours that the nasty Bulgarian had been prosecuted as a Death Eater. Karkaroff might have been pardoned by the Ministry, but so had been Malfoy, and Avery, and many others who Remus would swear had willingly followed Voldemort and would run back to him the instant they heard of his return. Harry and this Krum fellow seemed to be friends —they addressed each other with obvious familiarity, and Harry had just punched the Bulgarian in the shoulder very much like Sirius used to punch James when he was being too much of an arsehole—, but it made him uneasy to see that Harry was so close with a possible Durmstrang student.
Remus considered what to do. These kids were breaking school rules, sure, but he wasn't a teacher anymore so as long as they were all safe he felt inclined to look the other way and not mention it to the Headmaster. He had intended to only reveal his presence if someone's life was in danger, and it seemed like that wasn't the case —the Bulgarian had the attitude of a ruthless personal trainer, but plainly he wasn't an immediate threat— so he should just turn around and leave now.
He swallowed a lump in his throat.
It had been so long since he had last interacted with non-werewolf people that he would welcome the most inane conversation with any random human, but this... this felt like an unbelievable gift. Harry was much more than a random human, and he was right there, standing only feet away. Remus wasn't confident at all that Dumbledore would allow him to meet with the boy if he asked to see him, so he should seize this opportunity to talk to him, to ask him about Sirius, and his scar, about Ron and Hermione, and Quidditch, and his new classes... He had not expected to feel this way if he ever crossed paths with Harry again, but seeing that the boy had moved on with his life, made new friends, learned new things, grown up in every sense... it wrenched his heart to realize that he had missed so much. Afraid that Harry would ask him difficult questions if he was open about his history with his parents and godfather, like an idiot Remus had tried to keep his distance last year, wasting most of the opportunities he had had to really get to know the kid and build a personal relationship, and now he feared he had gone back to not knowing him at all. To not mean anything to him nor have any kind of role in his life.
Maybe that was for the better, though, he thought miserably as he watched Harry laugh and argue with his new friends, all gathered around what seemed like a jar filled with blue light. Right now Remus couldn't make himself available to him, nor correspond with him, nor invite him to stay with him over the holidays, nor even promise to visit again. It would be wrong to risk the boy getting attached to him when he had nothing to offer and he might be dead any day. Not that he had much hope that Harry would want to be around him, of course, not after Remus had almost killed him and his friends and messed everything up by letting Peter escape. If only he had drunk his potion that night...
Feeling utterly despondent, and thinking in defeat that perhaps Dumbledore had always been right to keep him away, Remus finally sighed and turned to leave, but he didn't get very far before he felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up and he swirled around reflexively to block a stunner that was coming straight at him.
"I told you I heard something!" exclaimed Harry's voice while Remus dodged some purple curse that looked too nasty to block. "There's someone there. We can't let him get away again!"
"You stay back, Potter!" commanded the Bulgarian, also sending a rapid series of spells in his general direction. Remus had been about to speak, but a sudden and inexplicable feeling of helplessness made him prioritize defending himself instead.
"Someone should fly to get help!" screamed the French girl.
"No one can help!" yelled Harry angrily, aiming another stunner at Remus' right as if to cut off his retreat. "And there's no time, we have to get him!"
"Maybe it's just a teacher!" suggested Cedric in panic. "What if it's Snape?"
"Snape would have already called me an idiot. Come on, we have the advantage, let's surround him!"
"Stay back, Potter!" repeated the Bulgarian harshly. "Diggory, you go left! Fleur-!"
"DON'T ATTACK!" finally managed to shout Remus. "I'M A FRIEND. HARRY, IT'S REMUS. REMUS LUPIN!"
"WAIT! DON'T ATTACK!" yelled Harry. There was a moment of absolute silence and stillness. "Professor Lupin?"
"Yes, Harry, it's Remus," he said, trying to sound calm and reassuring even though he didn't think his heart had pounded this wildly against his chest since the last war. Which was absurd, considering that he engaged in deadly fights with his fellow werewolves every other day and that four semi-qualified kids were hardly a threat to him. But there was something about this situation —perhaps all the unknown factors, or Harry's incongruous level of power— that made him extremely anxious and filled him with an unsettling certainty that he was, indeed, at a disadvantage.
Despite his uneasiness, Remus pocketed his wand and walked forward unarmed, opening his arms like Harry had done before as a gesture of surrender. He moved slowly too, since there were still three wands pointed at him and one of those belonged to Cedric Diggory, who might not be half as civil to his former teacher now that he knew what Remus was —Amos Diggory had very strong opinions about werewolves, and no doubt he had warned his son against them. The foreign students —especially the French girl— also might have trouble tolerating a werewolf even if the full moon was weeks away.
"It's all right," said Harry to the others when Remus approached enough for his features to be recognizable under the blue light of the curious flame jar. "He's a former teacher of ours."
"Hello everyone," greeted Remus pleasantly, feeling relieved when the Bulgarian bloke lowered his wand. The French girl might be more likely to be prejudiced against werewolves, but that one seemed less tolerant in general. And more dangerous. "Good to see you again, Cedric. Your stance has improved a lot."
The Hufflepuff hesitated a few more seconds, conflict plain in his eyes, but he finally dropped his wand as well.
"What are you doing here, Professor?" asked Harry.
"Call me Remus, Harry, please. I'm no longer your teacher." And we're basically family, he would have liked to add. He also would have liked to hug the kid, but he wasn't sure that would be well received. They had never been that close, and there was something about Harry that didn't really invite to get closer. "I was on my way to the Headmaster's office when I saw you fighting in the distance. I rushed here in case someone was in trouble, but I see now that you're with friends."
He glanced significantly at the unidentified students, hoping for an introduction, and after a disconcerted pause the boy obliged him.
"Hum... You already know Cedric, and these are Viktor Krum and Fleur Delacour," he said awkwardly. "They're not really friends, we just-"
"Of course we are friends!" complained the girl indignantly. "I thought we were, at least."
"Sure, Fleur," said Harry with a shrug before continuing the introductions. "Professor Lupin was our DADA teacher last year. He's the one who taught me the Patronus Charm. And he was a friend of my parents."
Judging by the enthusiasm with which the French girl approached to shake his hand, Harry had talked to her about him before, and whatever he had said had been good. The kid definitely must have neglected to mention that he was a werewolf, and Remus hoped Cedric would not mention it either, since even after all these years it still felt like a stab in the gut every time he saw friendliness instantly turn to horror and revulsion in people's faces when they realized that they were in the presence of a monster, and it would be a hundred times worse to witness that transition in what was probably the most beautiful female face he had ever seen. The Bulgarian didn't seem to know he was shaking the hand of a werewolf either, although it was actually hard to tell what might be going on behind that fearsome scowl.
"So... you're exchange students?" asked Remus curiously, forcing himself not to stare at the probably underage girl. Clearly he had run wild for too long. Although she didn't smell completely human, so perhaps his weakness had a different explanation.
"Not exactly," said the Bulgarian with a frown. "We are here for the tournament."
"Krum is the champion of Durmstrang," explained Harry. "And Fleur is the champion of Beauxbatons."
Remus glanced at the foreign students in confusion. The words 'tournament' and 'champion', associated to Durmstrang and Beauxbatons, brought old history lessons to mind, but none of that made any sense in the current context.
"What tournament?"
The four kids stared at him as if he had just asked who Albus Dumbledore was.
"Well, the Triwizard Tournament, of course!" exclaimed the French girl.
If not because the situation felt vividly real, Remus would have been sure that he was dreaming. Perhaps he was hallucinating? It seemed more likely that some of his fellow werewolves might have dosed him with something than that he was at Hogwarts being introduced by Harry to a pair of Triwizard Champions, one of whom was a girl from fantasy land.
"Professor?"
Who would dare drugging him, though? They better kill him before the effect wore off, else they were going to sorely regret it...
"Hum... Remus?"
Harry's voice calling his name broke through his vengeful musings and brought him back to Reality. Because this was real, he felt sure of that. He supposed it wasn't impossible that the Triwizard Tournament might be happening again —there had been multiple attempts to revive it in the last two centuries, after all. And while a prank also seemed more likely he didn't think Harry was like James in that regard —in any regard besides looks and flying skill—, and it was actually easier to believe that a highly competitive, medieval tournament had been reinstated than that Durmstrang or Beauxbatons were exchanging students with Hogwarts.
He cleared his throat.
"Sorry," he said. "I was out of reach this past year, it's been a while since I last put my hands on a newspaper. Does this mean that you're Hogwarts' champion, Cedric? I'm not surprized."
It was beyond surprizing that the three champions were training together like friends, and Harry's presence out here in this context didn't make any sense, but Remus couldn't think of a more worthy student to represent Hogwarts than Cedric.
The Hufflepuff looked terribly uncomfortable.
"I... yeah, I'm a champion... so is Harry. Hogwarts has two champions."
That absurd statement should have been confirmation that he was hallucinating after all, but instead it had the effect of completely dispelling his sense of unreality and snapping his brain into sharp alertness. His eyes flicked back to Harry while his mind tried to get a grasp of the situation, a horrible picture slowly taking shape as the unlikely pieces of this nightmarish puzzle fell into place. Harry was a champion in the Triwizard Tournament. A tournament that had been discontinued because too many children had died in the most gruesome ways. The boy was only fourteen, he hadn't even taken his OWLs —although he seemed advanced and remarkable powerful for his age. There were four champions, for some reason, and it was easy to guess that Harry was the extra one.
Voldemort.
Whatever was going on, it had something to do with that evil bastard.
And Dumbledore...
The Triwizard Tournament traditionally started on Halloween, so this wasn't new. Harry had been participating in a deadly tournament since October, and the Headmaster had not informed Remus about it. And what about Sirius? He must know, and he must have freaked out. Had he returned to Britain? Had he tried to remove Harry from the tournament or directly from the school? Was he safe? What if he had been caught and Dumbledore had kept that from Remus too? No doubt the old man had known that Remus would have aborted his mission if he had thought that Harry or Sirius were in immediate mortal peril, but he still should have told him what was going on! What if Harry had died in some task? What if Sirius had lost his soul? How could have Dumbledore allowed Harry to become a champion? Was he at least making sure the boy received special training? Remus knew that it was against the rules for a champion to receive help, but surely no one would expect a fourteen year old to survive on his own. It seemed like Harry was training with his fellow champions, but they were all just kids, he should have a qualified tutor. Remus would have volunteered for the job, if he had known...
"I didn't put my name in the Goblet willingly," snapped Harry suddenly. "Someone confunded me and somehow made the Goblet forget that there were only supposed to be three champions. Voldemort is behind it, it's not my fault!"
Remus was surprized by the outburst, until he realized that he was almost shaking with rage and panic and powerlessness. Harry didn't seem afraid, just defensive, but the other champions were looking at him warily, especially Cedric, who was gripping his wand tightly and kept surveying the sky as if to make sure the moon wasn't skulking behind some cloud.
He forced himself to take a deep breath and calm down. This was why he had always tried to remain integrated to human society instead of joining a pack. The curse was easier to bear in the wild, but it became harder to control his violent nature the longer he lived amongst his kind with nothing but werewolf laws and instincts to rule him.
"I'm not angry at you, Harry," he assured him, running a hand through his hair to help himself handle his anxiety. "I've already guessed that Voldemort is somehow involved, I just... this is a shock for me. I thought you were safe here. If I had known..." he hesitated and glanced at the other champions. The girl had said that they were all friends, but they were still rivals, so Remus couldn't very well help Harry cheat in front of them. He also couldn't ask about Sirius, nor talk about his werewolf mission, and he wasn't sure it was wise to mention the scar pain either.
"We will leave you to catch up," said the French girl tactfully. "Can I borrow your broom, Harry? I want to show Viktor that I can beat him in a fair race."
Harry's serious expression suddenly changed to amusement.
"Sure," he said with a smirk. "I don't mind if you knock him off his broom and make him swim to shore."
The Bulgarian scowled, but there was some amusement in his dark eyes as well. He threw an almost threatening look at Remus as he turned to leave, though, and by the way he glanced at Harry it was clear that he didn't like the idea of leaving the kid alone with a stranger.
"Don't worry, Mr. Lupin," said the girl before walking away. "We are all helping Harry train. And he saved my little sister, so I will make sure he walks out of the maze alive."
"Yeah, don't worry, Professor," said Cedric, still looking at him warily but sounding firm. "Harry is well prepared, and we will all try to protect him in the maze."
Remus watched in perplexity as the three older champions picked up three of the four brooms propped against a nearby tree and took off. He felt extremely confused, but also somewhat reassured, since it was clear that they had all taken Harry under their wing and were not only helping him prepare for whatever was coming —a maze, apparently— but were also determined to protect the younger champion during the task. Plainly they hadn't been chosen to represent their schools merely because of magical skill, but because they were exemplar human beings, the kind that put ordinary people to shame.
He looked at Harry. This kid definitely was champion material too, whether the Goblet of Fire had been tricked to choose him or not. He was the kind of person who inspired the fiercest loyalty, and who made people want to protect him because he was too busy saving others to prioritize his own safety.
"If you just learned about the Tournament, you probably don't know about the unhelpability," said the boy before Remus could decide what to ask first. "Champions can't be helped, the Goblet makes it impossible, so don't bother trying to offer me advice, or books, or even asking me about the alliance. I really don't need outside help at this point, anyway, we're all working together and helping each other, and we have a tight training schedule to follow so I don't think we could spare the time to learn any additional spells or read any more books."
Remus stood there, again feeling as if he were dreaming while he tried to process Harry's words. Was he saying that there was some sort of magical restriction in place that made impossible to help him? Why couldn't Remus ask about his alliance with the other champions, though? And what kind of magic could prevent random people from saying something to someone? He wanted to ask clarification about that, but Harry's annoyed tone made clear that he didn't want to discuss the subject, and it sounded like any attempt to help would only mess up their 'tight schedule', so he decided to just go along for now and demand answers directly from Dumbledore later.
"So..." he said finally. "How are Ron and Hermione?"
"Hermione is fine. She's dating Krum."
"Krum? You mean..."
"Yeah, this Krum," said Harry pointing at the sky. "He's all right."
Remus nodded. The Bulgarian seemed a bit too old for Hermione, but she was a responsible girl, hard to fool or distract from her studies, and this Krum seemed to have Harry's stamp of approval so he figured there was nothing to worry about. And it was actually reassuring to know that the Bulgarian was dating a Muggle-born. Add that to the protectiveness he had exhibited earlier and Remus was no longer concerned about Harry being friends with a Durmstrang student.
"And Ron?"
Harry shrugged.
"I guess he's fine too, but we're not friends anymore."
"I'm sorry about that," said Remus sincerely. "What happened?"
The boy shrugged again and shook his head.
"It doesn't matter."
Remus could tell that it did matter, but plainly Harry didn't want to talk about that, so he didn't press the subject even though he wished he knew more so he could advise him how to patch things up. Friends were important, and Harry and Ron had been so close... It looked like Harry had other friends now, though, good friends who had his back and made him laugh, so Remus was satisfied on that accord.
He glanced around and focused his senses to make sure they were completely alone.
"And Sirius?" he asked next. "Have you heard from him? Is he still abroad, or...?"
Harry shook his head and also scanned their surroundings before answering.
"No. He was worried, so he came back at the end of the summer. He stayed hidden or moving around until the Goblet chose him as my hostage for the Second Task, then Dumbledore had to bring him to Hogwarts and put him to sleep at the bottom of the lake." Remus' expression must have been horrified, because Harry rushed to reassure him. "He's fine. I got him out just in time, and he was in dog form so no one knew who my hostage really was. After that I kept him here with me for a week, but dogs are not really allowed in Hogwarts so I had to send him away." He looked around again before adding in a whisper. "He's staying at the Burrow now, Mrs. Weasley is feeding him up." His eyes twinkled with amusement. "She even took him to the vet."
Remus was still freaked out about the hostage thing, and panicked at the idea that his fugitive friend had been for an entire week at Hogwarts in plain sight, and confused about the Weasleys' involvement —Harry had said that he was no longer friends with Ron—, but he couldn't help to laugh at the idea of someone taking Sirius the dog to the vet.
"He must have hated that," he chuckled. "But I'm glad he's well taken care of."
He was more than glad. Of course Sirius living full time as a dog wasn't ideal, but at least he was in a safe place with people who took care of him instead of on the run eating lizards with a hippogriff as only company. He just hoped the Weasleys would not get in trouble for sheltering a fugitive.
Laughing over Sirius and the vet seemed to break the ice between them, and suddenly Remus didn't feel so much as if he were facing a strange kid. The whole situation was surreal, and he had more questions than certainties about Harry, but this felt similar to how it had felt last year when they had met for the Patronus lessons or when they had had tea in his office. In a way it was even better, since now Harry knew that Remus was a werewolf, and they could talk about Sirius knowing that he was innocent, and they no longer had teacher-student rules dictating how they could and couldn't interact with each other. Last year Remus had felt terrible constrained when talking with Harry, and while apparently now there were other important things they couldn't talk about it was a relief not to have any more secrets on his side. To feel that he could face and answer truthfully any personal questions the boy might have for him.
Harry also seemed more relaxed and comfortable, so much so that he invited Remus to sit by the fire —meaning, the glass jar filled with blue flames— and he even offered him hot chocolate and biscuits.
"I see you came prepared," observed Remus with amusement.
Harry shrugged.
"Fleur says that Krum gets too cranky when he's hungry, and we do get hungry after a few hours of hard work."
Remus tasted a glorious Hogwarts biscuit that almost made him cry in nostalgia.
"As a Marauder, I'm impressed," he admitted. "You don't even seem worried about being caught duelling and flying over the lake in the middle of the night."
"All the teachers are looking the other way," explained Harry with a smirk as he poured hot chocolate from a flask and handed him the cup over the blue fire. "They can't give us permission, because that would be help, but they can pretend not to know what we do."
Remus raised an eyebrow.
"The teachers know that you're sneaking out after curfew?" he asked in disbelief. "And they allow it?"
"Yeah."
"Even Severus?"
A conflicted expression appeared on Harry's face.
"It was actually Snape who gave me the idea," he said. "Dumbledore couldn't give me permission to fly, so Snape told me I should ignore the Headmaster and find another way to get what I needed. He said I would be stupid to stick to rules that work against me, and that since no one could help me I should help myself. At first I thought he was setting me up, but he never came out here to get me, and sometimes he even draws Filch away when he knows I'm trying to slip past them invisibly." Harry sighed. "He's been acting weird this year."
It was definitely beyond weird that Severus had encouraged any student, and particularly Harry Potter, to break rules, even though it sounded like it was the sensible thing to do for a champion. Remus still didn't understand how that no-help rule worked, but if it was true that no one could help the champions in any way then telling them to help themselves was very good advice.
"Did you know that Snape was a Death Eater?" asked Harry suddenly.
Remus was instantly on high alert.
"I... No, I didn't," he said slowly. "We all suspected, back then, but when the war ended and he remained in Hogwarts as a teacher I assumed we had been mistaken." He hesitated. "You know for a fact that he was a Death Eater?"
The boy nodded.
"There was an article a few months back, Rita Skeeter exposed him," he said. "And Dumbledore confirmed it." He looked at Remus curiously. "How come you don't know anything about anything? Where were you all this time that you couldn't receive any news?"
"I was... out of reach," said Remus carefully. "Living with my own kind. We tend to isolate ourselves." Harry's eyes widened, but mercifully he didn't comment nor ask for details about his werewolf life. "I kept in touch with Dumbledore, but he didn't tell me... I would have tried to help you or send you advice if I had known, Harry," he assured him.
"That's all right," said the kid with a shrug. "You couldn't have helped anyway if you had tried, you would have only gotten frustrated, so it's better you didn't even know. Hermione almost had a nervous breakdown trying to help me." He chuckled. "I think she hates the Goblet of Fire even more than we do."
Remus felt conflicted. Could that have been the reason why Dumbledore had not told him about the Tournament? To spare him the frustration and worry? He should have at least told him that Sirius was back in Britain, though. And Remus would rather have a nervous breakdown trying to help than to not even have the chance to try. What if Harry had died in some of the tasks? Dumbledore should have at least given Remus an opportunity to see the boy and say goodbye before he risked his life rescuing a hostage from the bottom of the lake or before whatever the first task had been about —he wasn't sure he wanted to know. He should have had a chance to offer Harry support, if not help.
And he should have been told last year that the person brewing his Wolfsbane was a former Death Eater. Of course Remus had known that Severus was dark to the core and cold as ice, and he had suspected he might have killed people during the war, but it wasn't the same to have confirmation that he had once been one of those masked bastards slaughtering Muggles and murdering Order members. That he might have easily been there when Fabian and Gideon had been tortured to death, or that he might have participated of the McKinnons' massacre, or that he might have had a turn with Mary...
Remus rubbed his face. No, Severus would have never done that. Killing, yes. Torturing, sure. Raping... no, Remus refused to believe that. Severus had been friends with Mulciber and other degenerates, but he had not been like them.
"I am certain that Dumbledore would not keep Severus in Hogwarts if he didn't trust him completely," he said with conviction. "He certainly would not have made him Head of House if he couldn't be trusted with children, and he would not allow him near you if he weren't certain that he will not harm you. Severus might have been a Death Eater, but that doesn't mean he still is one. People make mistakes, Harry, but they can also learn from them and make better decisions if someone gives them another chance."
He could easily imagine how Harry might have reacted to the news that his most hated teacher had been a follower of Voldemort —it wouldn't surprize him at all if the boy had attacked him again or at least refused to attend his classes. Although the kid had said that Severus had advised him and even cleared the way for him to sneak out to fly, so perhaps things weren't so hostile between them anymore.
"Dumbledore said that Snape changed sides and became a spy about a year before Voldemort fell," said Harry after a thoughtful silence. "I saw the memory of his trial... Snape was who warned Dumbledore that there was a traitor on our side, and who told him that Voldemort was after my family. He wanted Dumbledore to be our Secret Keeper, but my parents decided to trust a friend instead." The boy looked conflicted when he raised his eyes. "Dumbledore said that's why Snape changed sides: because he had not signed for murdering women and children when he had joined the Death Eaters, and Voldemort deciding to target my family made him realize his mistake. He... he looked so remorseful in his trial, so tormented..."
Remus' heart clenched. It was still painful to think about James and Lily's deaths, but this... Could have Severus truly changed sides to protect Lily? Had he cared about her that much? Had he really suggested Dumbledore to be the Secret Keeper?
Had Lily known?
Severus had tried to protect her even though she had married James. Remus felt ashamed for having considered even for a second the possibility that he might have done something nefarious to Mary, Lily's friend and a Muggle-born like her. And he felt touched, and impressed by Severus' backbone, and guilty, and so sorry...
"It's all so confusing," was saying Harry. "Moody is convinced that Snape is fooling Dumbledore, but-"
"Moody?" asked Remus in confusion, pushing his emotional turmoil to the back of his heart. "He's here?"
"Yeah, he's our new DADA teacher," said Harry. "He's been keeping an eye on Snape and Karkaroff the entire year —Karkaroff is a Death Eater too, by the way. Moody thinks that Snape is who entered me in the Tournament and killed Crouch, but-"
"Bartemius Crouch is dead?" interrupted Remus in shock.
"Yeah, he was Voldemort's prisoner for a while, kept under the Imperius Curse, but Wormtail made some blunder a few weeks back and he escaped. Someone killed him when he came looking for Dumbledore, and at first I thought it had been Snape, but Snape was actually making sure I was all right, but now everyone suspects Snape, and Fudge doesn't believe that there was someone invisible nor that Voldemort is behind it, he thinks I murdered Crouch..." Harry buried his hands in his messy hair. Remus just stared, dumbfounded. "I think Snape really is on our side, and he... he has sort of helped me several times. Not always directly, but... his insults are sort of useful, and the lines he sets me in detention too. He gave me the idea of sneaking out to fly, and he pestered me until I got a date for the Yule Ball, and he sort of pressed me to do more research and try to crack the clue for the Second Task, and he told me I should focus only on surviving the year... He was really angry when I became a champion, and when I flew over the Forbidden Forest, and when I almost drowned, and when Cedric left me alone with a madman. Krum says that Snape worries about me, that he looks after me, and... I don't know... Snape gave me Dreamless Sleep after the First Task, and when I was having nightmares about Crouch, and he fixed my face when Ron punched me, and he forced a bezoar down my throat when I was asphyxiating after the Second Task. Even when he was furious after Crouch he gave me a Calming Draught instead of punishing me..."
Remus' mind was in overdrive, trying to organize the heaps of information that Harry was randomly throwing at him. Moody here in Hogwarts. Ron punching Harry. Crouch captured, imperiused, murdered in front of Harry by the sound of it. Peter involved somehow. Voldemort returned? Harry and Severus both suspected for Crouch's murder, but apparently there had been a third unknown suspect —was that why Harry had reacted so aggressively to Remus' presence before? Had he thought the murderer was back? And Severus... It did sound like he had been watching over Harry, advising him, attending to his health both physical and mental. The notion of Severus Snape caring about Harry Potter's nightmares or about his date for a ball seemed absurd, but if he was looking after the boy for Lily...
"It doesn't make sense, though," continued Harry shaking his head. "Snape hates me. He really hates me, now more than ever. When I look back it seems like he has been helping me, but at the time he was just hating me, insulting me, giving me detention, accusing me of unfair things... I swear he put the dragon's eye in his office just to freak me out, and he tortured Sirius, twice, he-"
"Wait, what?" interrupted Remus, trying not to freak out himself at the idea of Harry facing a dragon.
"Yeah, he crucio'd him after the Second Task," said Harry angrily. "I guess that's sort of understandable, because Sirius had bitten him when Snape was trying to help me breathe, but the next day Snape tortured him again during Potions class, crushing his bones and forcing me to give him whatever potion I brewed. My Skele-Gro worked, but everything mended wrong so professor Grubbly-Plank had to vanish and re-grow the bones again. And ever since then Snape has been more and more nasty, really really hating me, and he hates me even more now because I attacked him after Crouch and he's now a suspect because of me." The boy paused to take a breath and rubbed his eyes under his glasses. "Dumbledore says Snape is just bitter and complicated and stressed-out, that he has been under a lot of pressure with Voldemort coming back, and his public exposure, and angry because of Sirius..." He sighed again. "And I sort of understand, but... it's really unfair. It's always been unfair that he hates me so much and treats me like crap just because I look like my father. And it doesn't make sense that hating me so much he still seems to be trying to keep me alive. When he saved me from Quirrell in first year... that should have squared the life debt with my dad, but it's as if he were still trying to square things... Krum says that he might be protecting me because of what I represent in the fight against darkness, and Snape did seem to really hate Voldemort in his trial, but he's so cruel and evil... If you had seen his face when he was breaking Sirius' bones... He really enjoyed that, and it's obvious that he hates Dumbledore, and he despises Hermione, and the Aurors found a lot of Dark Magic in his wand when they checked it after Crouch's death... He has a Death Eater cover to maintain, sure, but even Dumbledore admits that Snape doesn't need to pretend to be a nasty bastard. It's obvious that he would be happier serving Voldemort, and even though he looked remorseful in his trial it's hard to believe that he would care at all about my family being targeted. He hated my father, and he hates me, and my mother was a Muggle-born like Hermione... I just... I don't know. Nothing makes sense."
Harry seemed to deflate when he let out the last word of his long catharsis —because that's what this was, definitely, a catharsis. Plainly the kid had needed to talk to someone about all this stuff, and despite his growing headache and difficulty to follow Remus felt elated that he got to be that someone. He might have been absent for most of Harry's life, and he might not be able to help him now in regards to the Tournament, but he at least had been here to lend an ear, and he was ready to lend a shoulder too if the boy needed it —and he looked like he might need it.
As to the content of his catharsis... It worried Remus —although it didn't surprize him— what Harry had said about the Aurors having found traces of Dark Magic in Severus' wand, and it made him uneasy the idea that he might intend to go back to Voldemort —if he was maintaining a Death Eater cover, then Dumbledore must be planning to infiltrate him as a spy again, just like he had infiltrated Remus amongst the werewolves, and that seemed far too dangerous for a man who apparently had been protecting Harry Potter since he was a baby. It worried him too that Severus had tortured Sirius, but he could understand that, and to be honest he thought Sirius deserved it, just as Remus deserved Severus' eternal contempt for not having intervened when they had bullied him at school. He could understand all the hate that the mere mention or memory of Sirius or James triggered in Severus, and if Sirius had bitten him...
It wasn't fair that Harry was paying for all that, though. The kid had nothing to do with what James and Sirius had done to Severus, he didn't even know...
Remus struggled to decide what to do. Severus was seriously messing with Harry's head, and the poor kid didn't have enough information to make sense of the irrational behaviour of an extremely screwed-up man. The boy clearly needed to know, to understand, but Remus hesitated to tell him, partly because he was pretty sure that Severus would not want Harry to know anything private about him —certainly nothing that might make him look weak or human, probably in fear that James' son might use it against him or mock him like James would have done—, and partly because he was loath to shatter Harry's image of his father and godfather. He didn't think it was right to paint them as anything better than they had been, but he knew that Harry would be the one hurt by the disillusion.
The boy was being hurt by his confusion, though. And Harry's lack of understanding must be hurting Severus too, even if the man would never admit it. No doubt it would help if Harry didn't blindly take Sirius' or James' side in the misassumption that Severus had been the villain of the story —not that Severus had ever been a saint, of course, but he hadn't been anything like Draco Malfoy either. Remus was willing to bet that, even hating him, Harry would have jumped in the young Severus' defence if he had ever come across James or Sirius bullying him, just like Lily used to do. And seeing that at the moment Severus seemed to have a more active role in Harry's life than any other adult perhaps it would be of more benefit to the kid to improve his relationship with him than to preserve the idealized image he held of his father and godfather.
His decision made, Remus took a deep breath and met again those piercing Lily eyes.
"I think there are a few things about Severus that you need to know, Harry."