Chapter 91:
Laxus first realized he was awake about the same moment he realized he wasn't. A pang of annoyance nagged at him as he glared up at the ceiling. There was weight at his side and warmth, a spine curled against him. He desperately wanted to roll over and wrap his arm around the sleeping form he knew would shiver and press to him, but he didn't.
He didn't? He... couldn't.
But that was ridiculous. He wanted to move, to roll over, to reach out for the warmth that was just inches away, inches away. He just had to, had to, move. Just move. It was so simple. Just move. Why wasn't he moving?
He was staring at the ceiling, laying on his back. His heart was beating in a nervous, not-quite-fast rhythm, and his breathing was measured and still. He couldn't move. Why couldn't he move? Was he asleep? A dream... this had to be a dream...
Wake up. Wake up. Wake up!
,';../'I s ';.. šś e ė ęe '; yÿo óø õ ùuú..;...
A bit of movement out of the corner of his eye caught his attention and his thoughts shuddered to a halt. There, in the doorway, in his peripheral... someone was there. A form or figure was... it was just standing there. The silhouette was shifting and squirming, like a swarm of moths or maybe wasps. Laxus's heart started beating harder and his breath... his breath didn't catch because it was incessantly slow, level, undisturbed. The fear was trapped in his chest, in his heartbeat going from a fast walk to a jog. He still couldn't move, couldn't turn his eyes to see who was standing in the doorway.
.; ;. ;- I I I s ';.. šś e ęe '; yÿo óø õu û,';../';.
Gajeel... it had to be Gajeel... just, just standing there? No, that wasn't right. Gajeel was beside him, wasn't he? Ah, wait no... no he wasn't. He had left late the last evening to go back to Ember Island. It couldn't be Gajeel. So, who was this? And why were they standing in the doorway unmoving aside from that shifting and skittering and writhing? The shadow that stood there and didn't see. But didn't it see him before? Didn't it...?
.; ;. ;- I I I s ';.. šś e ęe '; yÿo óøu û,,';../';.
The nightmare... the nightmare he had in Davian's manor. It was... it was that thing. But it wasn't staring at him now, it wasn't smiling. Its back was to him as it stood in the doorway. How did he know that? He couldn't see it. It wasn't dragging him to the alter with its many hands and voices but... but those voices...
Through the thudding of his pulse in his own ears, Laxus could catch a whisper. A whisper, and then another. That was familiar, the whispers. Where had he heard them before? There were more, a few of them, and then as if they were aware he could hear them, more started to join. A few turned into several, which turned into many, and soon it was dozens of whispers, hundreds. Hundreds... Thousands...
.,/ - ;- ,,..;#;.- ';.....I s ';.. šś e ė ęe ';..;.. ÿ y o öò o ';...ü û- ,,..; - ,,..;#;.- ';. #;.- #;.- -` ,/^,..; ;. ;- - - .,/- ;- - -;; . , ,';.. , ;. ;- - - .,/ - ;- - -;; . , ,';.. , ,';../';.. - - ,,..;#;.- I Ï Į se éë e e y y ' ÿ y o oóø õ u';. u ú ū ù... #;.- -` ,/^,..; ;. ;- - - .,/ - ;- - -;; . , ,';.. , ,';../';.. #;.- -` ,/^,..; ;. ;- - - .,/ - ;- - -;; . , ,';.. , ,';../';.. - - ,,..;#;.- I I Ï Į hh aäà vyve ë e sšeė ęeñn yyÿo óø õ u ú ū #;.- -` ,/^,..; ;. ;- - - .,/ - ;- - -;; . , ,';.. , ,';../';.. -#;.- -` ,/^,..; ;. ;- I I Ï kkno o óøw w yÿo óø õ u,..; ;. ;- - - .,/,,..;#;.- ' yyÿo óø õ u ú.- -` ,/,,..;#;.- ' H Håa ā ay veę ė -;; . , ,';.. , ,';../';b be ë ée nń n,,..;#;.- '-;; . , ,';.. , ,';../';T To ø uùc çh eé d #;.- -` ,/^,..; ;. ;-';../';.. - - y y ÿo óø õ u ú hh åa ā ay veęė ';../beëé e to øu ūcč h he ęd d ';../';.. - -.- -` ,/^,..; ;. ;- I I Ï kkno o óøw w yÿo óøõ u ,';../';.. #;.- -` ,/^,.,';../';.. #;.- -` ,/^,. I Į seéë e e - -` , y y ' ÿ y o o óø õ u.- -` ,/^,..; ;. ;-,,..;#;.- #;.- - IĮ Í f feë ęeł l yÿôuū';*^,#`~_- Y Ÿ Yoøu û cçaänń nñoòtt ,,..;#;.- #;.- --*-,.";_., Y Ÿ Yoøu û c çaän ń nñoò éśscçćáä aåappé ';.. , ,';../';.. - -,..;#;.-R RRûuú u üńn n,/^,..; ;. ;-';../';Y Ÿ Yoøu û c çaän ń r rû u ń n..;#;.- #;.- -` ,/^,..; ;. ;I I Ï w wa âä ań nt t h hi įíim m ,,..;#;.- #;.- -Ÿ Yoøu û c çaän ń't t éś sc çáäa ppę e..;#;.- #;.- -` ,/^,..; ;. ;I Ï w wiį ï lł lł h ha á av yv e é ë .- '-;; . , ,';.. , ,';..I Ï w wi į ïlł lł ,,..;#;.- #;.- - I Ï w wi į ï łl ł h haav y ve é ë - -;; . , ,';.. , ,';../';.. -#;.- - Whh a ä aå tt į is m miïíñ n ńę ée ë - -;; . , ,';.. , ,';../';.Ÿ Yo øu û;.. , ,';../';..Ÿ Yo øu û c çaänń't t,,..;#;.- #;.../';.Y Ÿoø û c çaän ń nñ néev veęr r e ę éśsc ç ćáä a åap pęe ë é;.. , ,';../';..,,..;#;.- #;.- - I I Ï w wi į ïł lł f fi ī įń nd y ÿó ou ú û ,,..;#;.- #;.- -Ï w ïlł f fi įń nd d y ÿóuú û. , ,';../',..;#;.- #;.-. ,.;#
It was turning towards him and Laxus still couldn't move. His heart was hammering in his chest even though his lungs still stayed steady. Had he been able to understand those whispers the last time? He hadn't, had he? Why could he now? Why could he now?
. , ,';../';..,,..;#;.- ; I I Ï w wïlłl ł f f fīndd y ÿouú û. , ,';..;..,,..;#;.- #;.-
. , ,';../';,..;#;.- #;.- YŸ Yøu û c çäń'tt ésçáäpęe e. ,./';..,,..;#;.;.-
It was facing him and he still couldn't move and his heart was singing in his ears. He felt dizzy. He didn't want it to look at him. The nightmare at the manor, the altar, it would drag him back. It would drag him back. No... nonono...!
It was suddenly there at the bedside and as its form shifted and slithered like a mass of snakes Laxus could see it leaning over him. An arm, a hand, was reaching out, down. The moving flesh he could see but couldn't was falling away, stripping back, turning dark and fingers long. Brown skin and manicured fingernails. Terror sank into his soul because he knew that hand. Laxus wanted to scream.
"Will it hurt?"
Laxus's eye was burning. It was intense, like a hot iron was searing into his socket, digging deep,
deep,
deeper.
He was standing in the middle of Magnolia, in the street. The buildings were brushing the skies like giants, windows staring vacantly down at him.
Staring.
Staring…
The sound of low mumbles made him spin around. There were figures in the street behind him, all of them with their backs turned to him, huddled in a semi-circle, whispering, muttering, fidgeting sporadically as if there were bugs crawling beneath their skin. Shuddering, he stepped closer. The pain in his eye sharpened, like a pin being driven straight into his brain from his eye socket and he doubled over, gasping from it.
"Help… Please…" he whined, falling to his knees as tears started blurring his vision.
"You're a Dreyar, boy," the voice echoed above him and he cringed away, "Dreyars don't cry."
It hurts…
It hurts…
. . .
He looked up and the figures were around him, mumbling and twitching and shivering as they stared down at him. Staring…
…They were staring
Why were they staring?
He was just a kid in the middle of the street… crying…
"Please… it hurts…"
They didn't answer, they just muttered and hummed like cold, lifeless machines... Buzzing like electricity in a lightbulb. Their mouths… wait… where were their mouths? They were faceless... They were faceless things glaring down at him with two massive, unblinking eyes, one filled with blood and the other glaring and bright with yellow light. Yellow and electric and they were reaching for him, fingers outstretched with long talons. He knew… he just suddenly knew he couldn't let them touch him. He had to run.
runrunRunRUN RU ! ! !
He screamed, horrified. His legs were so short and he was so small. They were faster than him, covering his meager distance in just a few long steps. Hands grabbed his shoulders and dragged him back to them. Dark brown hands, angry hands, hands like stone that rooted into his skin so he couldn't get away.
"Let me go! Please!"
A dark face smiled down at him with massive white teeth. Wide teeth. Teeth that could open wide and swallow him whole. He screamed and thrashed and tried to get away but he was held tight. He was sobbing, begging, please just let me go I'm scared. All of the faceless things were wrapping their fingers, their arms, their hands and sharp nails around him, into him, and he screamed as loudly as he could. His eye was pouring burning, searing hot tears down his face. A massive hand reached for him, no, not him, it reached for his eye. Fingers were digging and pressing into his skull, digging and rooting and pushing until he thought his eye would pop in his skull and ooze blood and molten fire down his face.
"This will only hurt for a minute…"
"Dad! Stop! Please!"
As it pierced into him, images began to flash through his head. That altar... the blood... hair... long, black hair... and strange thoughts began to bubble into his mind and he could almost see it. He could feel it.
You'll thank me for this later.
Ivan? It was Ivan's voice, through the lens of a different Laxus in a different time, before he understood that even your parents could hurt you. When all he wanted to do was just be good enough, to ease that dissatisfied frown.
This will only hurt for a minute.
You'll thank me
You'll thank me for this later
Weak mages don't have a place in this world
Laxus couldn't cry anymore. It was so agonizingly hot that it burned away the water before it could come. He was gripping his face, praying for the pain to go away, for it to stop… stop…
…please
…please stop
…make it stop
…it hurts
It hurts…
It
hur
ts
…
I
t
h
u r
ts. .. .
You'll thank me for this later.
It hurts...
You'll thank me.
Please... please stop...
You don't want to be weak forever, do you, boy?
Help... me...
Suddenly, it wasn't Ivan's voice anymore. But it wasn't those voices. A hand on his shoulder, wide and warm and comforting. Fatherly. Those eyes that couldn't see, somehow, they were gazing down at him and they saw his terror as it leeched through his chest.
It is not your fault you were made this way. Imperfect. Afraid. Mawkish.
-#;.- -` ,/^,..; ;. ;- I I Ï kkno o óøw w yÿo óø õ u,..; ;. ;- - - .,/,
I know what it is to be hated for being weak. I know your fear.
..;#;.- #;.- - IĮ Í f feë ęeł l yÿôuū';*^,#`~_-
It is ok that you are not enough. That is what gods are for.
,/^,..; ;. ;I I Ï w wa âä ań nt t h hi įíim m ,,..;#;.- #;.
I can take it away. I can devour those things that make you ugly. I ask nothing of you.
. ;- - - -;; . , ,';.. , ;. ;- - -GG Gi îve hìmm t öø o m mę ê é.,/ - ;- - -;; . , ,';.. , ,';../';..
Feel my touch. Know I am with you.
, ,';../';..,,..;#;.- ; I I Ï w wïlłl ł f f fīndd y ÿouú û. , ,';..;..,,..;#;.- #;.-
I know you.
. , ,';../';.;#;.- ;.-I will have what is mine.. , ,';../';..,,..;#;.;.-
I will find you, Laxus.
Laxus shot up in bed, gasping. His fist clenched, ready to release an attack on what was hovering above him... except there was nothing. He was... alone.
Through the veil of adrenaline, a dull ache slowly came forward, gently nudging at him as if to say don't forget me. His eye was throbbing. He pressed his palm to it, wiped a stray tear that managed to escape. He put his hand down next to him, and when he felt nothing he glanced to where the shape of Gajeel should have been only to see him nowhere to be found.
Ah, that's right... he's at therapy.
He swallowed hard, sort of grateful he wouldn't see him so upset. He could talk himself down, this way, without prying eyes.
He hadn't had nightmares about Dad since... well, since he was a kid. He rubbed his thumb up his scar, pressed into his closed eye, and he was suddenly taken with the urge to just gauge it and the lacrima out entirely. Ivan had done the opposite once, and he'd kept his eye. What would be so different about pulling it out? But even as he pressed his nails around his eyelid, he knew he wouldn't do something like that. Gauge out his own eye? He was only starting to get used to Gajeel digging those talons into him when he was unhinged, now he was thinking of gauging out his own fucking eye?
He'd almost talked himself into actually doing it, once, when he was a teenager. He'd been hormonal and angry, had probably listened to too much music about being pissed at his dad and destroying things. He'd gone into the bathroom and just stared at his scar, at his eye, and pictured the throbbing orb that had caused him so much pain as a child. He wanted to take a spoon and just dig it out, but instead had just used his fingertips. It didn't take much to dissuade him from trying hard. Just a little bit of pain and the way his vision blurred and threatened to leave him, was enough to scare him out of it. He always had been a little shit when it came to sharp pain. He sort of liked being able to see out of both eyes, even if one was slightly impaired.
Erza had her eye gauged out. Can't be all that bad if she can manage it. Erza is a strong woman, a strong mage. That prosthetic eye probably sees better than yours. It would probably be an upgrade... if you had the balls to do it.
"Stop bein' a kid," he growled to himself, trying to silence his spiraling thoughts. The nightmares were doing this to him, lack of sleep always had a tendency to make him start a cycle. Start a cycle. He hadn't been wary of something like that since...
He clicked his teeth. He wasn't really sure what he was doing, just sort of aimlessly trying to shove his mind to anything that wasn't memories of being a nervous kid. He'd gotten over that part of his life, at least, twisted nightmares be damned. He remembered waking up screaming when he was little and Gramps would always come in and see what was wrong. Those coal-dark eyes were always so gentle and he'd tuck him back in to some story of fairies and their possibly-existent tails...
Those days had all been a little blurry, but the dreams weren't. It was always the same, his father and what he'd said, the way that disdainful frown had finally melted into a grin, except it was far more terrifying than he ever thought it would be. He was used to those rigid shoulders and pointed beard, always sharp, always strikingly sour, always looking at Gramps like he was owed something and Gramps had never paid up. And then Laxus was a child sitting in a chair and he wasn't all rigid, black lines anymore. He was smiling. As a child, that's all he really wanted, was to make his dad smile. After all, he didn't have his mother. Gramps was easy to charm, but not dad, not Ivan.
The things he would have told his child self, if only he had known.
Now, he couldn't even picture himself without his scar. When he was younger, he'd gone shopping with Gramps to find some new shirts. It was the day he'd gotten his favorite headphones, the ones he'd broken when he'd taken a mission he foolishly thought he, Bix, and Freed could handle, before he'd quite grown into his magic. He remembered, when Gramps had him stand in front of the mirror wearing some shirt Laxus hated, that the corners of it folded inwards so he could see himself from all sides. Where the two mirrors touched, it split his face in half, reflecting his unblemished side to the other and forming a scarless face. He must have stared at it for too long because Gramp's eyes had gone dark.
"Doesn't look very badass, eh, Gramps?" he'd laughed, "I look like some sort of kid."
Gramps hadn't laughed. Of course, he didn't. Laxus knew he partly blamed himself. All of those nights growing up when Laxus had woken with night terrors, all of those days Gramps had praised him for good grades in school, had told him there were so many things to be good at besides magic, it was all to make him feel good enough. He'd always supported Laxus's love of music, had him in professional ballroom dancing – he actually couldn't quite be bitter about that one anymore, could he? – tried to get him interested in playing an instrument. It hadn't mattered by the time he was in his teens, though, when they started realizing just how strong of a mage he really was. That became all Laxus cared about, then, getting stronger.
He'd dropped out of school, started taking missions like everyone else. Makarov preached about everything he was letting go of, told him he'd miss it. To this day, he'd still never admit if he did or not. He wasn't sure he did. He didn't think he did. He'd always wanted to be a mage, never in his life had he regretted his decision. And for good reason. He was S Class in no time, after all, although some people muttered it was because he was the guildmaster's grandson. But of course, he'd proved them wrong quickly enough. Most of his guildmates couldn't look him in the eye until recently, after he'd simmered down and been allowed back in. It was so funny. He'd spent so much of his life begrudging Gramps for everything he'd done, and now he wanted to be more like him.
A sound from down the hall caught his attention. Laxus dredged himself from the confines of his own mind enough to register that Lily was hopping happily up the stairs, humming to himself as he approached.
"Laxus, Master Makarov is here. He said you two were going to the guild today," he popped into the doorway, holding a kiwi in his hand with a genial smile on his face. As he made eye-contact with Laxus, though, it quickly melted, "Oh... are you not feeling well?"
"Hm? I feel fine," he muttered, pulling back the covers so he could step out of bed. He stood and immediately felt dizzy. He wavered on his feet for a moment as his vision flushed with black spots, and suddenly Lily was at his side transformed and holding onto his arm to support him. Laxus's heart was hammering in his ears so much so that the whole world sort of throbbed, and he realized he was out of breath. He was pushed back onto the bed and he waved off Lily as he instructed him to keep his head down while he went to go get Makarov.
Laxus sort of helplessly nodded and scowled at his feet. What the fuck was that?
Ignoring the way his hands and legs were shaking, Laxus again pushed himself up. His head swam and with each step he felt pinpricks shiver up from his ankles and disappearing at his thighs. Blearily, he began recognizing what was happening to his body, and he had a hard time believing it. He turned into the bathroom and stared at his figure in the mirror, stumbling into the sink and hanging onto it in case his legs might decide to fall out from under him.
"Goddammit..." he breathed.
The light was giving him a headache as he swept his gaze across his figure. From his workout the day prior, there were bruises dotting up his ribs and chest. His eyes were bloodshot and sunken in, pink and purple ringed, like maybe he'd gotten into a fight or hadn't slept in three days. He was so incredibly pale, even his lips looked gray. His mind was starting to fuzzy and he absentmindedly ran a cold, shaking hand down his bare chest, watching the pressure cause the pigment to flee and how it didn't return. A whine worked it's way up his throat.
Oh gods... no.
"Laxus!" Pantherlily was at his side again, wrapping an arm around his in earnest, "You shouldn't be standing. You're going to pass out."
Laxus heard a sharp intake of breath and he glanced down to see Gramps in the doorway, a startled look filling his face, "Laxus... what...?"
Laxus forced himself to smirk, though it was more teeth than smile. He could feel the nosebleed before the blood started dripping, "Think we might need to call Porlyusica."
Laxus tasted metal in his mouth just before he blacked out.
"Your eyesight has changed quite dramatically from the last time I examined you," Porlyusica noted, "They're even a different shape."
Laxus just sort of grimaced, not enjoying the way her breath was falling on his face. It wasn't that she smelled bad, the woman was so dense with herbs even her natural scent was tinged with ginseng and chamomile. It was more the closeness of the old woman he wasn't fond of. His eyes were having a hard time focusing, especially his right one, and trying too hard to do so only exacerbated his migraine. She sort of frowned as she drew back from him, crossing her arms over her chest as she gave him a full once over. It made Laxus's heart start beating harder. When was the last time she'd examined him like this?
Lily was curled up at his thigh in the blankets, his soft warmth seeping into him the gentle reminder he was home and safe. But he felt anxious. His stomach kept turning over and over. It was hard to tell if the nausea was from the nervousness or from his faintness. His hands and legs were still shaky and if he moved too quickly, he felt dizzy again. Dread was seizing into his chest just as her mouth twitched and her sharp frown eased.
"I'm not sure what to make of it," she admitted, "It's like you're suffering from magic deficiency, or possibly pallor. And you haven't done anything to expel a massive amount of magical energy?"
"You heard any thunderstorms lately?" he snapped.
One of her brows rose sharply at him, "How ungrateful. This is why I can't stand humans."
"What can be done?" Gramps was frank, his bushy brows pulled down in concern. Laxus didn't miss the look in his eyes. The familiarity of all of this was what had Laxus so anxious. He hated it.
"I can give him an elixir to replenish magic. If it's pallor, then this could be fixed a few ways, a better diet for starters," she loured down at him, "you can always try a chalybeate spring."
"Are you telling me I'm iron deficient?" despite the brooding old woman standing over him, Laxus let out a chuckle.
"I'm telling you, you're anemic," she stated flatly, pulling out a bottle from her satchel that she'd brought with her, "Probably."
"How can I be anemic? I just had a nosebleed."
She looked at him critically, "Pale skin, extreme fatigue, weakness, headache and dizziness, fast heartbeat and shortness of breath, easy bruising, even the nosebleed; these are all indicators of anemia. Now the fever..."
"And his eyes?" Gramps demanded quietly. There was a stillness in his voice that spoke volumes, even Porlyusica's expression softened at it. Laxus rubbed at his scar.
"My eyes are fine, Gramps," he replied easily, "If anything, they're better than they used to be."
But Gramps wasn't looking at Laxus. His coal eyes were turned towards Porlyusica's red. She regarded him coolly, although she never did quite stop frowning.
"The boy isn't lying to you, Makarov, his vision has actually improved in spite of your fears. If that lacrima was going to take his sight, it would have done so a long time ago."
Laxus let out a tense breath. The room seemed smaller, or maybe it was just because it was so full of people. He wasn't used to having so many bodies in his bedroom, especially one that smelled so strongly of herbal medicine... and sand. Something sort of smelled like sand.
"Now that I think, though, it is possible the lacrima could be absorbing your magic," Porlyusica mused, turning her deep red eyes back to Laxus, the latter of whom sort of winced in response, "Have you used it recently that it may need to replenish itself?"
"I haven't used it since, well, I was a kid," he admitted, "too worried it would fry my face."
"I'm surprised someone as reckless as you would be concerned about it," she stated tersely. He wanted to roll his eyes, but he also didn't think it would be wise to be openly disrespectful towards the woman giving him medicine, so he refrained, "Still, this sort of thing doesn't typically have a sudden onset..."
At that, Lily's ears sort of twitched. He glanced over at Laxus and said gruffly, "Well... you have been waking up sort of weak the past few weeks, haven't you? Since you had that fainting spell at Gajeel's welcome home party."
Laxus's pulse started racing a little faster. He gave Lily a look but the damage had already been done.
"You fainted at the welcome home party?" Gramps asked, concern bleeding into every word he spoke.
"I was drunk, I blacked out," he replied as dismissively as he could.
Gramps turned his attention to Pantherlily, his lips set in a pensive scowl, "This has happened before, Lily?"
Pantherlily sort of looked at Laxus sheepishly. He couldn't really get mad at the Exceed. He'd watched Gajeel deteriorate without doing anything and it had almost gotten his friend killed. He couldn't blame him that this time he made his concern more vocal. So, Laxus just rubbed agitatedly at his scar and refused to look at him, resigned to what where this was going to go next. He felt like his insides were slowly trying to see if they could turn themselves into a fishtail braid.
"He's been waking up pale and weak... he says it's because he's been training too hard lately."
"What have you been doing in your training, son?" Gramps implored, gripping onto Pantherlily's words like a lifeline, "Maybe you're pushing yourself too hard?"
"It's just weight training," Laxus muttered.
"Still, if you're not eating the way you should, even just weight training..."
"Have you been having issues controlling your magic, Laxus?" Porlyusica interrupted. He felt like her eyes were the tips of needles digging into his skin. A tense silence descended on the room. Laxus's stomach found a new way to knot. He couldn't find a way to draw his eyes from his knees.
"Yes."
Lily stirred at his side, sitting upright, "Why are you asking that? What's wrong?"
"Have you considered that maybe it's the lacrima doing this to you?" she asked bluntly.
"I have."
"I don't follow. How is it hurting Laxus?" Lily asked.
Laxus patted his head softly, "Most people don't know, but I was kind of a sick kid growing up until Dad infused the lacrima into my body. Shortly after, I got a lot worse."
Pantherlily opened his mouth like he was going to ask a question and then looked over to Gramps who was glaring at the ground. Laxus didn't think he'd ever seen his grandfather look so small before. His fists were clenched, his dark eyes filled with the distress Laxus felt in his chest.
"If my body and the lacrima haven't properly incorporated, then it'll leach out my magic... like a parasite," Laxus murmured, rubbing the Exceed's ears more in an attempt to keep his hands busy than to comfort him.
"I don't understand... why would this happen now? You've been fine all this time...?"
"It could be that Laxus's body is no longer producing the amount of magic it used to," Porlyusica suggested, "And the lacrima is taking more magic than Laxus can regenerate. It wouldn't be unheard of, especially since you were also a late bloomer.
Lily sort of shook his head slowly and then looked up to Laxus for answers. He smiled down at him gently, "It means I won't be a mage for much longer."
"That's not completely true, Laxus," Gramps' voice was shaking, despite how he was trying to stay calm, "you would still have the ability to use magic, just not to the scale you do now."
"None of this is for certain," Porlyusica stated, staring down at the guildmaster with more compassion in her eyes than Laxus thought he'd ever seen there before, "It could just as likely be that the lacrima is absorbing more than it had before, and that's why we're seeing a difference. Without being able to observe what's happening, it's nearly impossible to tell. All that we can tell, is that something is draining Laxus's magic and his issues with anemia seem to have returned."
Laxus's stomach twisted and he felt like he was going to throw up. He could feel Porlyusica's eyes on him. Her heels clicked coldly on the ground as she approached and placed the potion on the bed next to him.
"This will get you back on your feet until we find out more," she stated firmly, "eat more red meat, leafy greens, sour fruit and the like to help with the anemia. I'll see what I can learn about the long-term effects of being infused with a lacrima. I'm sure there's someone else whose dealt with this before. In the meantime, try not to take any strenuous missions."
"Yeah..." Laxus committed half-heartedly. Gramps muttered a thank you, never moving his eyes from the ground. Laxus thought he was going to choke on the silent anger emanating from his grandfather, "Gramps, it's not your fault."
"I never should have left him alone with you," he gritted out. Laxus could feel the magic swelling and a white light flickered from his grandfather as his anger leaked out from where he couldn't keep it any longer, "I should have known better."
"You had no way of knowing what Ivan was capable of."
"That doesn't mean I shouldn't have been more cautious. I should have never let him get close to you. I should have exiled him from the guild before he could do any more harm..."
"Gramps, he was your son."
His eyes gleamed with magic, "I should have taken that thing out of you when I had the chance."
"Don't be fucking stupid, old man," Laxus clicked his teeth, "It could have killed me."
"And it's not killing you now?" he demanded.
"We don't know that."
Porlyusica stepped forward and smacked the old man on the back of the head. He stumbled and glared at her but the woman was as rigid and fiery. Her eyes flashed as she glowered down at him, "You can't change what Ivan did, but you can be the support Laxus needs now. Quell that stupid temper of yours. It's not helping anyone."
Gramps crossed his arms and stared down at the floor. His magic dropped and slowly the glow around his outline faded. That was Gramps, he supposed, slow to anger but wise enough to realize when it wasn't needed. The scowl across his features didn't soften, though. Laxus let out a tense breath, pulled together his resolve, and plastered an easy-going smile on his face.
"We'll figure it out, Gramps. That's the Fairy Tail way."
Gramps didn't smile back at him. If anything, he looked sadder. Beneath his white mustache, his lip quivered.
"I'm not a fool. I know how much being a wizard means to you, my son," he shook his head slowly, "I'll find a way to make this right."
"Of course, Gramps. You always do," Laxus's smile faltered as Gramps turned to leave. Porlyusica followed suit, her red cape scraping gently across the floor as she went. It felt like most of the light left the room with them.
Lily placed a paw on Laxus's arm, "I'm sorry, Laxus."
"Yeah... you, uh... you mind hugs?" he asked, sort of scoffing at himself for being such a kid. Lily smiled sympathetically and hopped onto his lap, rubbing his face into Laxus's chest as the blonde stroked his fur, "This sorta calms me down."
"Cats are good for that," Lily agreed and snuggled into a ball. Laxus sat there for probably too long just petting down his back and thinking about what he was going to say when Gajeel was back the next day.
Or maybe he just shouldn't say anything. After all, Gajeel had enough to worry about.
Author's Notes:
I hate 's beef with formatting. I can't copy and paste from AO3 because it drops all my italics. If I copy and paste from Word it removes spaces - most notably from italicized words - messes up italics and bold, and other dumbs stuff I can't remember off the top of my head. And since I posted on AO3 first, and made a couple edits, I have to go through and find what I changed and retype it in or else paste from AO3 and had fix everything that should be italicized. I wish it would just convert but noooo wants to make things difficult. Allow me to beset you with my petty posting drama lol
I actually made an outline of chapters until the end and if all goes according to plan and I don't slip in any more unnecessary things, we'll see the ending on chapter 126-ish! There is a light... it's just much farther away than I thought it would be lol This is the last arc, it's just a BIG arc haha.
There's a lot going on and you all don't know me, so I'm not going to laden you with my opinions. The US is a wild place to be in right now, and a lot of people are showing their true faces (at least the people I know are). I will say, though, that from working at a bank there was one thing they taught us from our first day of training that I think we should keep in mind; money and property can be replaced, your life can not. You're all beautiful beans. Please stay safe.