Chapter 20

Life at Spinners end

Harry stood in a cluttered sitting room. Snape had stomped off deeper into the house and Harry had been left standing there unsure of what he was supposed to do. He closed his eyes and allowed the wall to lower just a bit.

He took a deep breath as he felt the emotions welling behind the wall. Sirius is alive. Sirius is alive. His mind repeated it over and over. He felt so overwhelmed with that knowledge. He was so happy and yet he felt so betrayed.

He wasn't really sure why he was here. Or where here was. He knew he was in Cokeworth, but what was this house? A safehouse? Snape's House? The conversation in the headmaster's office all seemed so fuzzy. He still felt mostly numb, but he thought he could listen to whatever Snape said when he came back. If he came back.

He thought he remembered Sirius saying that he would see him soon. Something about behaving. Probably to behave himself. He wished he could go with Sirius. But he couldn't allow himself to hope. Not now. Maybe not ever again. He'd had his heart broken to many times to hope things would ever get better.

Strange words circled inside his head. He thought Sirius had said that he loved him. That couldn't be right. No one ever said that to him. His friends showed how much they cared in little ways. Sirius and Remus had too. But no one could love him. He believed he'd been loved as a baby but…But not now. He was a freak now. He didn't deserve their love.

Harry sighed.

If he was to be stuck with Snape for an undetermined amount of time. Possibly even the whole two months left of summer he needed a plan. Snape was a lot like his aunt and uncle. He expected perfection and regardless of your effort it was never good enough. He wasn't sure what Snape would be allowed to get away with since this wasn't school. Best to err on the side of caution. He wished he could just run back to his quiet little motel room. However, learning they were in Cokeworth was unfortunate. Even if he changed his appearance, Snape could use a simple point-me spell and find him.

Harry considered going somewhere else but what was the point? He had already established himself here. He had gotten to live as just Harry. He'd never have that again.

Harry heard movement in the hall and assumed the position he took when he knew Vernon was in a mood. His hands folded in front of him, and he looked down.

Snape stormed into the room and took a seat in the old armchair at the far end of the room.

"Stop loitering Potter. Sit. We've got several things to go over." Snape snapped.

Harry glanced at the options. There was a long beaten down couch and another armchair. Deciding on the couch at the far end from Snape, he took a seat at the edge. Then he waited.

"You will have rules while you are staying in my home, Potter. You will follow them or there will be repercussions. Your god-mutt nor the headmaster are going to come save you from the consequences of your actions. Do you understand me?" Snape snarled.

So, this was Snapes house. Well at least that had been cleared up.

"Yes, sir." Harry said quietly.

"Eye's up Potter!" Snape snapped.

Harry raised his head and met Snapes black eyes. He noticed the man now had a faint scar near his hairline. He wondered if that was from the night he'd run away. He felt the guilt bubble in his gut. It had been his fault Snape had been found out. His fault the man had been tortured. His fault he'd nearly died. He didn't like Snape but he was a person and he hadn't deserved that.

Harry swallowed hard. His guilt often felt like it was drowning him. He'd not been able to face his friends in the hospital wing when they had returned from the Ministry. It had been cowardice, but he just couldn't face what he had done. He'd felt like he was suffocating on the train home. Now he was facing another person who had been hurt by his actions. One who no doubt found him at fault. He pushed the shame and guilt deeper to listen to the man.

"Now, you will not be sitting on your backside all summer. I along with the rest of the Order have been looking for you for over a week. I think that some punishment for this foolish and dangerous behavior is in order. You will be given a list of tasks at the beginning of each day, and you are done when those tasks are completed. Am I clear?" Snape barked.

So, very much like life at the Dursleys. He could do this. He didn't want to. It had been nice being paid and acknowledged for his labors. However, he was familiar with this. Maybe he'd even be allowed to eat occasionally. However, Harry wouldn't count on it.

"Yes, sir." Harry replied.

"Good. Now I won't take your wand, as that would be a security risk should someone learn of your location. However, you are not above the rules, Potter. As an underage wizard you are prohibited from using magic outside of school. If I find out that you are, you will be punished." Snape continued.

Harry hadn't done any magic with his wand all summer and hadn't planned on it.

"Now, I found the vial of your little experiment at Grimmauld. I have no interest in housing or cleaning up after whatever beast you've managed to turn yourself into. You will stay in this form. Do you understand me? You will not use your metamorphmagus abilities to mock me. You will not transform into whatever creature you've managed or there will be consequences." Snape hissed.

Harry's mind spun a little. Snape knew about his Animagus and that he was a Metamorphmagus. Did the whole Order know? Did Ron and Hermione? They would be upset that he hadn't told them. Harry bit his tongue when he felt tears stinging the back of his eyes. He already felt so alone. If Ron and Hermione abandoned him because of his secrets he really didn't know what he would do.

Then a more depressing thought entered his head. He had been trying to distance himself from them. He wanted to keep them safe. It would hurt to have them leave all together but maybe it was for the best.

"Yes, Sir." Harry choaked out, staring over Snapes shoulder.

Harry needed Akela to sleep. Or he would need his magic to cast a silencing spell. He wouldn't risk waking up Snape in the middle of the night screaming. He'd learned that lesson over and over at Privet Drive. That last night had been enough to ensure he'd never sleep without a silencing spell again. Or some other way to keep his nightmares at bay. Like a dreamless sleep potion or his Animagus.

"You will stay in this house unless you have my express permission to leave. You will be clean and presentable. No more of these rags Potter. Certainly, your relatives bought you a respectable wardrobe. Although I suppose you weren't wise enough to pack anything before you took your unauthorized vacation." Snape said, closing his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose.

Harry had seen that look on Snape before. It was his 'clearly done with the situation' expression.

"I have my things professor. My trunk is shrunk in my bag." Harry whispered.

Snape shot him a dark glare.

"Very well. I will enlarge it for you when I show you the room you will use. I use the word 'use' specifically. You are being given the privilege of the room. It is a privilege you can lose. This room is not your room. You will not hang anything on the walls, leave anything on the floor or anywhere else in the room. You will keep it clean. You do not have any reason to expect privacy. If I think you're up to something, I will enter. I will regularly search your room if I believe it is necessary. Do not give me reason to believe it is necessary." Snape threatened.

Harry was not surprised or unfamiliar with any of these rules. No magic, don't do anything freaky or suspicious, long lists of tasks, no privacy, threats of privileges being taken away. Harry may as well be back at the Dursleys. Snape seemed the type to use corporal punishment in his own home. Harry was used to that too. He hoped his professor wasn't hiding any perverse tendencies. That last day at Privet Drive had opened Harry's eyes not only to the type of man his uncle was, but also put many things of his childhood into a different light. One that Harry was actively shoving in the deepest darkest corners of his mind.

Harry felt his stomach twist. It was one thing to fight off his muggle uncle with a wandless stunner. Snape would be a different story.

Harry wrapped his arms tight around his stomach. He felt dirty and disgusting. He wished he could throw up and then take a scalding shower.

Harry realized Snape was speaking again and refocused. He could feel the stone wall trying to crash down and he couldn't have that breakdown in front of Snape.

"…If you are to leave this house you will be respectful to the people that live in this town. This is where I live, Potter. I will not have an arrogant, lazy, dunderhead, like you ruin my reputation in this town just because you think everyone is beneath you." Snape snapped.

Harry thought he'd done a decent job of being respectful to the people of Cokeworth. He'd tried. He probably hadn't succeeded. He knew he didn't deserve there kindness. He was a freak. He'd 'lied about being normal' as his uncle would have accused him of. He'd been punished for that before. When he'd assumed he could sit on the furniture. Or eat with the family. Or want for anything. Freaks didn't deserve anything.

His mind drifted to the people in Cokeworth. He still needed to pay Mary back. Suddenly remembering he was meant to go back to Mary's to do the roof, his eyes shot to the clock. It was now just after noon. Harry groaned internally. He wouldn't be able to go. Maybe he could sneak out later.

Harry deflated. He hadn't been here twenty minutes and was already making plans to break rules. He'd just have to wait until Snape allowed him to leave.

"Are you listening to me?" Snape snapped.

"Yes, sir." Harry said, ducking his head again.

"Look at me when you speak." Snape yelled.

Harry's head popped up and his eyes went wide. He could feel his palms getting sweaty and his heart was pounding. He waited for whatever would come next. He hadn't meant to be disrespectful.

Snape sneered at him.

"You will be respectful, Potter. You will be respectful of me and my home. You will stay out of my bedroom and my potions lab. You will not go snooping through my things." Snape growled leaning forward in his chair.

Harry leaned away and nodded.

"Yes, Sir."

"Very well. Your arrival has delayed my day. I assume you can manage to make something simple for lunch and then you will start on your list." Snape said standing and motioning for Harry to follow.

Harry stood on shaking legs and followed Snape.

Harry took in his surroundings. The house was old and rundown. It wasn't beyond help but it needed work. He imagined Snape hadn't had much time to work on it given the long school years. He hoped that Snape would set his tasks and let him work like a detention. He hated it when his relatives stood over him while he worked and criticized him. It made the tasks take longer and put him on edge.

"I haven't been home much. I've been walking the streets looking for you. There isn't much in the fridge. Make what you can from whatever's in there." Snape sneered.

Harry nodded and made his way to the fridge. Snape took a seat at the table and pulled open the newspaper.

"Do try not to poison us." Snape said blandly.

Snape wasn't kidding when he said there wasn't much. Harry looked over the supplies and decided on soup. Harry looked in the cupboards and found an impressively stocked spice cabinet. He found a pot and cutting board and began chopping vegetables.

Harry lost himself in the motion of cooking and allowed himself to relax slightly.

Severus sat stewing at the kitchen table. He couldn't believe Albus had shoved the boy off on him. What was he supposed to do with the brat? He didn't know why he had assigned him to make lunch. He was starving and it was only adding to his irritation. He hadn't eaten before he'd gone to the meeting this morning and no doubt the boy would make something inedible.

The boy had pouted all through his explanation of his expectations. Then he'd gotten all jumpy for no good reason.

Severus groaned.

He just wanted his summer back. He needed some fresh air, but did he dare leave the boy alone?

He glanced over and saw the boy stirring a pot and hoped he could avoid burning the house down. He stood and strowed to the back door and slammed it for good measure. He made his way into the small back garden. The sun beat down on him. He knew it was expected to get quite warm today. Perhaps he would send the boy out for some uncomfortable yard work. That should keep him out from underfoot for a while.

With another deep breath he walked around and decided what he wanted the boy to do. There hadn't been much work done out here. He'd hoped to grow some potions ingredients, but the ground was overrun with weeds and grass. He kicked at some loose rocks.

Severus let his mind wander over the meeting that morning. Albus was planning on sharing more information with him and Minerva. Although they'd be waiting for it. It wouldn't be Albus if he couldn't find a way to manipulate the situation. However, he had seemed genuine with his intentions.

Then there was the mutt. His story was a lot to take in. Although Severus had to admit, he was a little impressed with the way Black had stood his ground with Albus. At least initially.

Severus wished he'd stood his ground about taking the boy. Albus had been able to convince him that it wouldn't be safe, and Black had just folded. He just hoped Albus worked fast. He did not want to house the boy all summer. Although perhaps this would be the summer, he finally got the house fixed up. The boy was lazy and wouldn't likely work very hard, but another set of hands couldn't hurt. On second thought, it was Potter, it probably was going to hurt.

Severus sighed. He'd been in the yard longer then he'd planned. He wasn't seeing smoke which is more then he could say if the boy had been left unsupervised brewing. Severus pulled his wand and cast tempus. It was just after one. The boy had had more than an hour, surely he was done.

When Severus opened the door, he was stopped short of his storming by the smell in the house. His stomach growled embarrassingly loudly. Severus felt his cheeks flush a little and was thankful the boy's back was to him.

He noticed Potter was working over a cutting board. It appeared he had found the dishes and set the table. Severus watched the boy work from the door for a moment. He moved with a grace Severus had never seen from the boy, outside of on a broom. He placed a basket of what smelt like fresh bread, and a pot of something on the table. He made his way back to the sink and filled two glasses with water and added those to the table as well.

Then to Severus' surprise he didn't sit down. He turned back to the sink and stood there with his hands clasped and his head down. Severus raised an eyebrow at the strange behavior. Why hadn't he just sat down and eaten? Severus shook his head and made his way to the table, taking his seat.

"Come on Potter, sit and eat. We've other things to do today." Snape growled.

Severus watched Potter from the corner of his eye. The boy moved slowly then sat practically at the edge of his seat. He had picked the seat opposite Severus. Which wasn't surprising, it wasn't a large table, but it felt strange to sit across from someone like this. He was used to sitting alone or next to his colleagues at the head table.

Severus took the lid off the pot and was once again surprised by the smell. It was wonderful. Which in itself was surprisingly suspicious.

Severus ladled the creamy soup into his bowl. He grabbed a few slices of bread and set them on his plate. Looking at the table he realized there was no butter. It wasn't a big deal, but it sounded like it would be good on the fresh warm bread. How had the boy managed bread in that amount of time anyway? And what fifteen-year-old even knew how to make bread. Severus had expected cheese toasties or something else equally juvenile at best.

A moment later the butter dish appeared in front of him and a soft 'sorry' came from next to him.

Severus looked up a little startled, he hadn't even heard the boy leave the table. He furrowed his brow as he watched the hunch shouldered boy retake his seat. He took a single ladle of soup and one slice of bread and seamed to eat the food in nibbles. Maybe the end of his adventure had spoiled his appetite.

Severus rolled his eyes as he buttered his bread. The first bite of soup was somehow more surprising then the smell. He looked into the bowl and scowled. How on earth had Potter managed this?

Severus brushed the thought away and ate his meal quietly.

When he was finished, he went to tell the boy he could start on the dishes, but to his surprise the boy was already at the sink.

Severus stood and took a slip of paper from the notebook by the phone and grabbed a pen. He wrote a few things. He figured it was enough to keep the boy occupied until dinner time. He'd planned to have the boy start his summer homework after. He no doubt hadn't even started. Severus refused to let the boy laze about in his house. Idle hands and all that.

"Here Potter." Severus said slamming the paper down next to the sink. I expect you to be working. Consider this like summer detention. And as I previously said there will be no magic or there will be additional punishments. Do you understand?" Severus snapped at the boys' back.

"Yes, sir." Harry said softly.

"Good. I will be in the lab. It's that door. Do not bother me for anything less than an emergency." Severus growled.

Severus quickly exited the room and went down the stairs to the basement potions lab. He was going to get lost in his brewing for a few hours and hoped Potter could stay out of trouble.

Harry sighed as he heard the door shut. His emotions were a wreck. Today had already been too much. He was just thankful Snape wasn't going to hang around.

Squaring his shoulders Harry dried his hands and picked up the list. He could do this. He'd lived this way his whole life. What was another summer?

Harry looked at the list and was confused. It was short. Snape had made it sound like he had a lot to do. The house could certainly use a lot of work. He guessed it might take him a while to deep clean. The list only said kitchen and back garden. Then in big letters at the bottom it said no magic, do not leave the property.

Harry sighed.

He found cleaning supplies in a small cupboard and got to work. There was a combination of muggle and magical cleaning supplies. He wasn't familiar with the magical ones, so he stuck with the muggle ones. He started with cleaning the cabinets inside and out and worked his way down scrubbing everything. Harry took note of small repairs that would need to be done. A bit of broken tile in the backsplash. A few loose cabinet doors. Several of the doorknobs needed to be tightened or replaced. There was some paint chipping on the walls. He scrubbed the walls down in case Snape wanted him to paint later. He found some sandpaper and rounded a splintered corner of the kitchen table.

As he went his list grew longer. None of it was impossible to complete but he would need supplies that he didn't currently have.

When he had finished scrubbing the floors and baseboards, he looked over the kitchen. It was definitely an improvement, but he was sure Snape wouldn't be impressed. He'd made sure to dust corners and get under items on the counters. Those were a few of Aunt Petunia's favorite things to nitpick.

With a sigh he went to his bag that was sitting next to the back door. Snape had said he'd have a room, but he hadn't been shown. He slung the bag over his shoulder and made his way outside. The yard needed work but not as much as Mary's had needed. It also didn't look like Snape had anything he was trying to plant, at least today.

Harry set his bag down next to the door and rummaged around. His body was starting to hurt again. He pulled a couple of the pain killers out and popped them in his mouth. He looked around and found a garden hose. When he turned the water on it ran hot for a moment then cooled enough to drink. He washed down the pills and wet his face. He was already sweaty from his work in the kitchen. He found a small shed at the edge of the yard and found tools but no gloves. He didn't really care. All the work he had done in the past had been without. Why would they give the freak something like that? However, while he had worked at Mary's yesterday, he'd been given gloves and the layer of protection they offered made the job much easier. He hadn't had any blisters or cuts from his work yesterday and that felt like a first.

Harry set out to fix the Potion Master's overgrown yard.

Severus cursed as the cauldron boiled over. He'd been working on experimental potions, and this was the third time it'd gone wrong. He'd need to look over his notes and work out what needed to be changed.

He vanished the black goo from the cauldron and rubbed at his eyes. He'd work on it tomorrow. He had probably been down here too long as it was. He glanced up at the clock.

"Fuck." Severus cursed as he quickly wiped his hands.

It was after midnight. He'd really lost track of time. He hoped the boy hadn't destroyed his house. Maybe he would be lucky, and the boy had just fed himself and gone to bed.

"Fuck." He cursed again shaking his head in frustration. He'd not shown the boy his room. Maybe the dunderhead had figured it out on his own.

Severus doubted it. If he was lucky the boy would have fallen asleep on the couch. With his luck the boy had trashed the house and eaten him out of house and home and was now up to some sort of adolescent mischief.

When Severus entered the kitchen, it was dark. He walked to the switch and turned on the light. The room practically glowed. Every inch had been scrubbed meticulously. Severus noticed the boys' list on the counter and walked over. It had been flipped over and on the back the boy had made another list.

Kitchen repairs needed. It said at the top. Then listed several small repairs. Cabinet door hinges, drawer handles, grease drawer tracks, plumbing tape to fix leak under sink, wood filler and finishing nails to fix baseboards, Replace broken tiles in back splash, replace fraying wiring in lighting fixture, wood glue and clamps to sure up loose chair legs, sandpaper and paint for the walls (paint chipping), weather stripping for window and door, sand table top and apply new stain, sand splintered corner of the table.

Severus furrowed his brow at the list. He looked around the room and noticed what Potter was talking about on the list. Severus made it over to the table when he noticed the last item on the list had been crossed off.

Severus ran his hand across the corner. It had been smoothed out. Severus had been considering replacing the table. It had a lot of marks on it. The worst was a splintered corner that had broken when he'd dropped a cauldron and the rim had ripped into the corner. He'd been so mad at himself he hadn't even bothered to cast a Reparo.

Severus looked around and noticed the boy's bag was gone from its place by the door. Severus groaned. The boy better not have taken off.

Severus stormed into the sitting room. Empty. Damn it.

Severus made his way around the first floor but saw no evidence Potter had been anywhere else in the house.

Severus stomped up the stairs and pushed open the door to the guest room. It too was empty. Severus coughed a little at the cloud of dust that hung in the room. This room would need more than cleaning charms. Severus groaned again. He stalked across the hall and pushed open his bedroom door. Thankfully, his room also looked undisturbed.

He looked down the hall and saw that the light was off in the bathroom. He walked down and checked just in case. Nothing.

Severus stomped back down the stairs. He walked to the front door and noticed it was still locked. Severus raised an eyebrow at that. He made his way to the back door and opened it. Severus noticed the outside light was on. Which was confusing, it had never worked. Potter was sat on the top step, hugging his bag with his head laying on it. His eyes were open, but he was just staring blankly.

Severus looked around the yard. The boy had cleared the whole yard. The patch of grass had been mowed down, the weeds had all been pulled and the bushes had been trimmed back. It even appeared he'd fixed a few of the fence boards.

Severus looked back down at the boy. Confusion filled his mind. There was no way Potter had done all of this. Not without magic, on his own, in one day.

Maybe the boy had just used magic. However, Severus knew that wasn't right. The boy was sweaty and dirty. He'd clearly been working.

"Come along Potter." Snape said.

Potter startled and jumped to his feet, nearly falling off the short porch.

Severus stared into the blank eyes of the boy. He still had that 'kiss by a Dementor' look. Now he also had bags under his eyes. He looked exhausted. His hair was mussed, and he still had a slight sheen of sweat on his forehead as if he'd only just stopped working. His face was pale and the scratches on his face stood out in sharp contrast.

Severus turned away from the boy and walked back into the house. He heard Potter walking in behind him. Severus made his way back upstairs.

"This is the guest room. Bathroom is at the end of the hall." Severus drawled.

He left the boy standing in the hall and made his way back downstairs.

He went to the fridge and was surprised to see that it didn't look like the boy had eaten anything. Surely, he must have eaten. It was nearly midnight. Severus pulled a bowl from the fridge and cast a warming charm over the leftover soup from lunch. Severus found some of the bread wrapped in a tea towel on the counter. He took his food to the table and ate his meal thinking over his experiment from earlier.

Severus heard the shower start running and hoped the boy wouldn't take too long. He was also ready to turn in for the night. Severus considered just using the ground floor bathroom but grimaced at the thought. It was full of dust and mold, and he was fairly sure some sort of pest had moved in while he'd been away this year.

He finished his food and quickly cleaned his dishes. The shower was still running so he made his way up the stairs and opened the door to the guest room again. He cast several cleaning charms at the room. It wasn't great but it was good enough for the night.

He made his way down the hall and knocked on the bathroom door.

"Don't use up all my hot water, Potter." Severus shouted through the door. He made his way back to his room to get out of his robes and boots.

Harry stood under the hot water and scrubbed harshly at his body. He felt dirty. The kind of dirty he knew he wouldn't be able to scrub off. He'd started the yard work and been able to distract himself from his thoughts. The mental wall had held well. As the day wore on though the pressure behind the wall grew. Harry had eventually lowered it a little more. However, this had allowed his mind to assault him with too many thoughts and memories. He'd gotten stuck ruminating on his last day at Privet Drive. He assumed being once again in such a comparable situation had forced that day back to the front. He realized he'd probably been using some version of the wall even then. He'd cut himself off from everything that had happened.

He thought he may have used this wall growing up as well. He'd let himself be emotionally numb. Then whatever had affected him as he entered the wizarding world had messed with that wall. He hadn't been able to bury his emotions anymore. Not until this summer. Now he could hide them away again.

He'd had more memories show up today. Things he'd forgotten. Been forced to forget?

Harry felt his stomach lurch. He felt as though he was going to be sick. He wanted to just go back to the Sundown. He wanted to go work for Jack and Mary tomorrow. He wanted breakfast at the diner listening to Jane fuss. He did not want to deal with Snape looming over him, yelling, berating, and making threats. However, he knew his option was stay with Snape or leave Cokeworth entirely. He'd have to leave the first place he'd ever really felt he belonged. He'd have to leave being 'just harry' behind. And he'd be in even more trouble when he returned to school.

If he even bothered to return. Right now, he didn't feel like he wanted to continue anything. Not even breathing.

Harry's heart began to pound, and he felt like he wasn't getting enough air.

Harry was startled by banging on the bathroom door.

"Don't use all my hot water, Potter!" Snapes voice boomed through the bathroom door.

Harry's whole body was shaking. He turned the water off immediately. He'd gotten lost in his thoughts. That was a dangerous game. He knew better in these situations. He stepped out of the shower and grabbed the towel he'd set out. He was furious with himself. How could he be so stupid? He knew showers for him in a house were meant to last for five minutes or less with cold water. He'd been spoiled with showers at the Sundown this summer. He'd gotten greedy.

He knew Snape had told him not to expect privacy, but Harry appreciated that he'd only knocked and yelled. Uncle Vernon would have stormed the room and ripped Harry out of the shower, before beating him for daring to think he deserved such a long shower. He'd have been reminded how much it cost to care for him, and he should be grateful he was allowed to shower at all. They could go back to hosing him down in the yard like the freak he was.

Harry aggressively wiped his body. He grimaced as the towel raked over the road rash. He wish it would heal faster.

He avoided catching his reflection in the mirror. Grabbing his clothes he quickly dressed. Thankful that he'd had the thought to enlarge his trunk long enough earlier to grab his towel, toiletries, and a change of clothing. He'd known it was a risk to use magic, but the later it had gotten without any sign of Snape he had worried the man had forgotten about his trunk. He hadn't wanted to be stuck without anything.

He'd nearly had a heart attack when a stray cat had made a sound next to the house, while he'd been digging through his trunk. He'd quickly grabbed his things, quietly closed the trunk, and shrunk it. He'd shoved it and his retrieved items back in his bag and took a deep breath. He wasn't trying to break rules. He did not want to incur more of the potion master's wrath. But he needed to take care of himself. No one seemed to notice that almost all of his rule breaking was done when he felt it was the only choice. He held a lot of shame when it came to breaking rules.

Harry hoped that he'd done a good enough job in the kitchen and back garden. Clearly, he was already in trouble for showering too long. But he was not mentally prepared for more aggression tonight if he'd also failed at his set tasks.

Harry grabbed his bag and shoved it on his shoulder. Then he grabbed his dirty clothing and trainers. When he pulled the door open, he was thankful that Snape wasn't standing on the other side. Harry padded quietly down the hall and opened the door to the guest room. It reminded him a little of the rooms at Grimmauld. Dusty and unused. He imagined Snape didn't have many house guests.

Harry walked to the bed and hoped nothing was living in it. The mattress looked lumpy and the sheets and blanket where an unknown color. Everything in the room was a dull washed out grey.

"Potter." Snape called from the open bedroom door.

Harry spun around. The lump lodging more firmly in his throat. He'd never been especially afraid of Snape. The man made him uncomfortable, angry, frustrated but not usually afraid. However, this was a completely unique situation. He was alone and in the man's house. He was dressed in only ratty pajama pants and an overly large holey shirt. He could feel his body shaking.

"If you want your trunk enlarged, I suggest you produce it." Snape said in a bored tone.

Harry nodded and dug into his bag. He set the trunk on the floor and Snape waved his wand. The battered trunk sprung back to size and Snape gave Harry one last glare before walking down the hall. Harry heard the bathroom door close and sucked in a shaky breath.

Harry made his way to his trunk and tucked his dirty clothing into his laundry bag. He was thankful he'd just done laundry, but he'd need to find out if Snape had a washer and dryer. Harry Had not looked around the house at all. He'd made his way straight to the yard when he'd finished the kitchen.

He looked at the stack of books and Sirius shirts. He needed to get those back to Sirius. He'd not taken them with the intention of stealing them.

Harry bit his lip. He listened for a moment and when he heard the shower running, he waved his hand over a spare piece of parchment and turned it into a small box. He thought about the box being light and bigger on the inside then the outside. Focusing on his magic he moved his hand over the box again. He'd never tried to cast a feather light or extension charm wandlessly but like his other wandless attempts it seemed to have worked.

Harry picked up the books and notes and placed them in the box. He added the letters and pictures he'd never had a chance to look through. He'd read the one from his mother, but he'd never gotten around to the rest. It was snooping and he should have known better. Harry's cheeks flamed with embarrassment.

He picked up Sirius' leather jacket. He'd felt like he could have been Sirius son when he'd left Grimmauld wearing it. He now felt a little sick holding it. He never should have assumed so much. Sirius didn't want him. He was just a freak he'd been stuck with. He folded the jacket and slipped it into the box.

He felt the pressure building again and allowed the wall to slip all the way down. He didn't feel as overwhelmed as he had last time. Probably because he'd slowly been allowing a little of the emotions to slip through over the last few hours. He still felt a stabbing pain in his chest.

Harry considered for a moment what he should do with the items he'd taken from Regulus' room. Sirius had told him he could take things from there. But he didn't feel comfortable with it. He took the beautiful green dueling robes and gently placed them in the box. He unfastened the wand holster from his arm and placed it in the box as well.

He would keep the Dark Arts books, journals, and the locket. He had no intention of keeping them forever, but he needed to figure out what they were before he got rid of them. He took Regulus' books and journals and shrank them. Then unlocked the box with the locket and cup and dropped them in there and resealed the box. He dug deeper and felt something sharp cut into his finger. He pulled his hand back and looked down into his trunk.

Shining back at him were the broken bits of the mirror. He'd been so angry and hurt when he had broken it. Now he felt terribly guilty. He picked all the pieces out and fit them back together and tried to cast Reparo on the shards. Nothing happened and Harry felt his heart sink.

Harry ripped the bottom of one of the raggedy shirts in his trunk off. He gently wrapped all the pieces in the shirt and tied it.

Harry closed his eyes and felt tears burning in the corners. He set the wrapped, broken mirror in the box. He closed the box and set it next to his trunk. He didn't know when the next time he'd see Sirius was. Maybe he could send it with Snape to the next Order meeting.

Harry placed his wand in his trunk. Snape didn't want him using it and he couldn't carry it properly anymore.

Harry was so tired and overwhelmed. He just wanted to turn into Akela and go to sleep. He was afraid Snape would come into the room and see him though so that was out of the question.

Harry walked to the door and closed it most of the way. It was silly to leave it open. But he feared being locked in again. He knew that even though there were no locks on the doors Snape could just come along and close the door and cast a locking charm. He'd just have to hope he didn't. He used to try and prop open the cupboard door, but it was always kicked shut and locked. Maybe it wouldn't be here.

Harry sighed and turned out the light. He lay down on the bed gently. His road rash was really hurting but he couldn't convince himself to get up again and retrieve more pain killers.

Harry curled on his side and thought about Sirius. He wanted to see him so badly. But he felt so betrayed. Why had he let Harry think he was dead? Why would he say he loved him but then let Snape take him? He felt so mixed up.

His thought drifted to the night he had left the Dursleys. Vernon had nearly killed him. He'd meant to kill him. Not that he'd never almost died before.

Harry waved his hand over the bed and cast a one-way silencing spell. He was definitely going to have nightmares. He didn't want to accidentally wake Snape up with his screaming. Harry felt more tears fall down his face. He had just started to feel like himself. He was getting a little confidence. He'd found people who liked him for just him. Not for anything else. And it had all just been washed away.

Harry choked on a sob.

He closed his eyes and cried until he fell into fitful sleep.

Severus dried himself off then wrapped his towel around his waist and exited the bathroom. He made his way down the hall and noticed the guest room door was still open. He rolled his eyes. The boy couldn't manage anything on his own. He looked into the room to verify the boy was in fact in his bed. Something he usually didn't have to do with anyone other than his first years. With that he pulled the door closed. He made it to his room and hoped he'd get some sleep. He needed the rest. This summer wasn't even a third over and it had already been too long.

Severus dressed for bed and settled down for the night. He raised his occlumency shields and allowed his body to relax as he drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

Harry's eyes popped open at the sound of the door closing. He felt every muscle in his body tense. The lump in his throat felt like it was suffocating him.

Harry listened to Snapes footsteps as he walked across the hall. When he heard the other door snap shut, Harry quietly got out of bed and walked across the small room. He laid his hand on the knob. His hand shook a little as he tried to twist the knob. He felt his breath come back to him when the door pulled open easily. Harry leaned his head against the cool wall next to the door and sucked in ragged breaths. When he felt calm, and the room felt like it had air again He returned to bed.

It took him a while but eventually Harry's eyes closed from exhaustion, and he was returned to a restless sleep.