Chapter 8 – In a Holding Pattern
Purgatory looked a great deal like a socked-in airport terminal, with lots of arrivals and few departures. The new arrivals roamed curiously, but eventually they grew bored and spent decades sitting and staring out at the fog. There were shops, with the lending library and the bars being favorite destinations. Chess, checkers and dominos were played in a few spots. No dice or cards were allowed. Arrivals were listed by name, and the screen updated regularly. Departures were only achieved when someone had served their penance, or someone had been misdirected. Those names were few and far between, so most of the time the Departure screen was only a blinking cursor.
By refusing to go to Heaven, Mary Magdalene ended up in Purgatory by default. She worked at the Information Desk, helping new arrivals find their way. Wearing an unbleached linen tunic and blue woolen wrap. The strip of fabric that bound her dark hair matched the ribbon Jesus kept wound around his finger. Aziraphale walked up to the desk. Mary looked up and smiled patiently, "Hello, I'm Mary".
With his opening twinkle, the angel introduced himself. "Hello Mary, I'm Fell. We have a mutual friend who needs your help, and I'd like a word when you're available- where is the best tea in the terminal?"
Mary looked puzzled, "friend?". Then Aziraphale set a tiny, carved dove, the size of a penny, on the desk. She picked it up lightly and moved her index finger over it as if she could feel the hands that made it. She took a deep, slow breath, before looking at the angel and said, "Purgator Tea, by gate 7. I'll be there in 12 minutes".
"I look forward to our conversation. Thank you, Mary", and Aziraphale walked away from a very stunned Mary.
He had just sat down in a corner booth with his tea with cream and sugar and a green with honey for Mary (having asked at the counter for her regular order), when she arrived, her face still questioning. He stood and indicated she sit first and then slid into his side of the booth. "Thank you for seeing me."
"How did you find me? Where did you get this? Who sent you? Are they finally sending me to Hell for refusing God?" Mary fired a volley of questions at the angel.
Aziraphale raised his fingers off the table and held them up in a shushing motion, trying to calm her. "Be not afraid. I am an angel from Heaven. You are most definitely NOT going to Hell. I sent me. Jesu asked me to give it to you. They've always known where you were, but He thought you were in Hell. Let me share with you my reason for being here."
"You call him Jesu? You have seen him?"
"Yes, please let me finish. Have some tea and listen, my lady." Aziraphale needed Mary to be calm to understand his plan.
"I have visited the Lord, He is in Heaven. They are waiting for him to begin the Judgement Day as foretold. He adamantly refuses to bring wrath down on Earth, and just as strongly asks for you. They didn't tell him where you were, because they want to keep him angry, hoping to push him into a mood."
"If his mood is even half of what mine has been, they might succeed." Mary took another sip. "I want to be with him, but I won't be an accessory to their butchery. Are you here to force me?"
"Absolutely not! I was recently promoted to a position in Heaven. I am supposed to help push Him to Judgement Day, but together, we are coming up with an alternative plan. I wanted to see you; knowing you are well would go a long way in helping him get his strength back. He seems diminished."
"No, he retreats when people expect an attack. He's hiding his light until he knows it's needed. That's what he does." She smiled knowingly, "He's sad, never weak."
"If you are willing to help, I believe we can get the both of you back to Earth, together. Until we've solidified a plan, everyone needs to stay on course. I will be in contact, either myself or another angel we can trust. Is there anything you'd like me to relay to Him?"
"Yes", Mary took the leather cord from around her neck. Undoing it, she took a lapis bead off the cord and replaced it with the dove. She kissed the bead and handed it to Aziraphale. "Tell Jesu it is safe to hope".
Aziraphale smiled broadly, "I think that is exactly what he needs to hear." He stood and bowed. "It has been an honor to meet you, and I hope we see each other soon."
Mary nodded back, "as do I, but let's not sacrifice caution for haste".
"Wise words. Until next time, Mary"
"next time, Fell."
The Acting Supreme Archangel reappeared in his office to find a frantic Seraphiel pacing. "Oh sir! They are looking for you!"
"Who?" Aziraphale quickly scanned the room.
"Michael and Uriel and Saraqueil. They want to know your campaign slogan."
"Sit down Raph". Aziraphale brought forth tea for them both and sat in the armchair. "Campaign slogan? For the Second Coming? Utterly absurd!" The angel thought of the more colorful responses Crowley would have for that idea.
"Well, they want something for the banners, and we'll need something to keep up the charade. I thought of a few, with your approval."
"Let's hear them, Raph. You are delightfully pithy at times. I bet you've come up with some jokes that fly right over their heads."
Raph pulled up his clipboard. "Choose Right or Choose Wrath"
"That's blunt" Aziraphale blanched.
"Taken from American politics. I think it's the one they'll like best." Raph went on to the next one "Time's Up!"...we'll save that for the second wave. Next up – "Are you Flying or Frying?", my favorite. How about "God doesn't make mistakes, did you?" and "Revelation, baby!" Raph set down the clipboard. "They'll like them all, disgusting as it is. Are we really ending everything?"
Aziraphale shook his head. "If you mean you and me, no. If you mean Heaven, not if we can help it. And if you don't trust me, remember, we have the Lord on our side. I can almost see our path, but for now, we wait for a door to open."
"Where is this door? Earth? And who's opening it? Crowley?" Raph had carefully avoided mentioning the demon in Aziraphale's presence.
"Why would Crowley help me? He's a demon. He'll be on the other side, recruiting for the Legions. Why did you mention him?" Aziraphale was trying to look disinterested, but the more he talked, the more he blushed.
"Sir, your partnership is well known up here. It's infamous for your accomplishments and scandalous for breaking the rules. Besides, the Metatron asked me to keep an eye out for any sign or mention of Crowley. I can honestly say there hasn't been. I didn't mean to upset you." Raph miracled some almond biscuits to calm the ASA down.
"I'm not upset! We're not partners. Are you a spy, Raph?" Aziraphale was actually turning redder. Outside, he it looked like he was getting angry but inside, he was in full panic "What does he mean 'well known'? We did such a good job of hiding the arrangement. I guess our botched eliminations after Armageddon revealed it."
"I was brought on as a spy. If anything, I guess I'm technically a turncoat now." He reached for a biscuit, "where's the door?"
"I don't know, so we wait. It's what we do. Plan and then wait for a door to open so we can charge in. And hope it's not a trap door, that always makes it a challenge." Aziraphale refilled his tea, needing the lift.
"You said 'we', Aziraphale."
"Well, this time, that's you and me. But I need a few things from the bookshop – are you ready to go to Earth for me?" smiling, Aziraphale knew how to distract Raph from his questions. They discussed the bookshop as they finished their tea.