Chapter 7: A Thousand Years

"The day we met / Frozen I held my breath/ Right from the start / I knew that I'd found a home for my heart"

'A Thousand Years part 2' by Christina Perri feat Kazee

A/N: Thanks for letting me take a much needed break. Enjoy this chapter!

"She will flatline in the real world, and she will die," Derek's eyes bore into hers, keeping her gaze with the seriousness in them, "She has to choose you. Do you understand? She has to choose you, or she will die."

Addison couldn't quite help the laugh that came out, her voice full of disbelief, "Do you hear yourself? That doesn't make any sense."

"Doesn't it?" he countered, and he sounded so serious that her smile slowly faded away to nothing.

"That's not funny, Derek," Her voice was hard, her eyes glinting with anger. What gave him the right to come into her dreams and tell her all of this?

His lips turned upward into a soft smile, as though changing the subject would make her anger at him disappear, "You get her, Addie. You do. You both have more in common than you realize. And you deserve to be happy."

Her eyes narrowed, "I don't need a blessing from a ghost."

"I thought you didn't believe this was happening."

"Shut up," she shot back petulantly.

"You know that this is real. Even if you think it's happening in your head."

"Okay Dumbledore," she rolled her eyes.

"You know it's real," Derek smiled at her, looking like he wanted to reach out but held back, "Even if you're trying to fight it, you know."

"We're done here," She declared as she stood up.

The conversation would do nothing but go in circles. There was no convincing her that any of this was real. Even if Meredith felt the same way, it was just a figment of her imagination. Her hopes for reality. And as painful as it was to be around Meredith right now, she would rather talk with the blonde than her ex-husband.

As she started across the beach, she looked for Meredith. Every single fiber of her being wanted her. Even if this was all in her head, she would rather see Meredith here, alive, than get a phone call that she was dead. She would rather stay asleep just so she could see her. All she wanted was to see Meredith. Now where was she? Even if she believed Derek for a second, if this was some kind of merged consciousness thing, she should be able to see Meredith, to always be with her, or something like that, right? But no, that wasn't what Derek had said. He'd said that the reason she was here was to help Meredith wake up.

And that felt so cruel. She was supposed to help Meredith wake up when all she wanted to do was stay with her here on the beach. She caught sight of Meredith in the distance and started towards her. She felt the longer she walked, the less she moved. She called out for the blonde, but no sound came out of her mouth. And that was fitting. That was how these dreams always went. Seeing her, touching her, but never getting to stay with her, being forced to watch as she walked away. And that was what was happening now as Meredith talked to someone out of frame on the porch, as the beach faded around her, as her vision started to leave her…

The loud crack of thunder pulled Addison out of sleep, sitting up in bed, her heart hammering loudly in her chest. From her spot on the hotel bed, she could look out the window and see the storm. Thunder and lightning danced in perfect harmony, rain pelting the windows loudly. Once the initial fear wore off – because really who liked being pulled from a dream by a thunderstorm – she relaxed back on the bed, trying to make sense of the dream. She didn't even know what time it was, and to be honest with herself, she didn't really care.

She needed to relax, to allow herself a moment to try and compartmentalize everything so far. She felt like she would spiral more than she already had if she didn't. She wanted to talk to Henry, to get him to understand that she still loved him, that she just needed time to herself for just a second. Thinking of her son made her feel worse. Who the hell just abandons their kid with their ex-husband to drive nearly 150 miles away? God, he must hate her.

But the thought of going back to LA didn't sit right with her. Not yet. Because as much as she was terrified of Henry's reaction to her sudden disappearance, she was terrified that the moment she turned her cell back on, there would be a message saying that Meredith was – no, she refused to even bring the thought to her mind. She couldn't. She needed a little while longer. And then everything would be okay. She would be okay enough to go back to LA and fake that everything was fine.

She made her way into the bathroom. A bath would definitely help her relax and get back to sleep. Maybe some wine if she felt up to more.

The bath water was as close to scalding as she could stand, and as she settled into it, she allowed herself to break. She gave herself to the emotions that she'd been fighting for the last few months, the sadness that swirled around her at all the lives lost, the rage at all of those that felt it was a hoax and publicity stunt, the anguish of possibly losing Meredith. If she lost Meredith, if Death finally decided that it was her time, she wasn't sure she could even survive. She knew it would break her. Her mind wandered, and she sank further under the water, allowing herself to be fully submerged.

The scene came instantly to mind and she was soon watching Meredith, lost in her thoughts just as she was, sinking under the water of a bathtub. She wanted to stay with her, to drown with her, to let the numbness take over. She didn't want to live in any place where Meredith wasn't.

And then the scene was changing and Derek was pulling Meredith out of the tub – and by extension her as well. She coughed and sputtered against unseen hands, her skin tinged pink from the hot water. When she opened her eyes, she was alone. And yet, it felt so very real, like ghost fingers were still etched into her skin.

She got out of the tub and drained the water, wrapped herself in a towel, her thoughts still swirling. What the hell was that? A memory? Some kind of vision? She had no idea. She dressed slowly, finally catching sight of the time: 4 am.

Her phone was decently charged, but she had no intention of using it beyond these next few seconds. She flipped the cellular data back on and ignored the flood of messages and missed calls that came through, focusing only on one name. She nearly rolled her eyes at the numerous texts, but she really should've known that leaving a note saying she was fine wouldn't appease any of her meddling — and well-meaning — friends. She knew by turning her data back on that any of the sent messages now said read on their screens, knew they would try to meddle more. But for the moment, she didn't care. No one else would know to back off, to respect her privacy, not the way Charlotte would.

I'm fine. Stop calling me, stop texting me. I am fine.

She texted out the message before she could stop herself and pressed send. Once it sent, she turned her cellular data back off. She let her phone fall onto the bed and leaned back into the soft pillows. She should've blow dried her hair, but the thought of doing anything extra was just as draining as the act itself. She allowed herself to relax, to clear her mind, to just breathe. All she wanted was to see Meredith. That was all…

The beach was still as warm as the first time. Addison breathed in slowly, taking in the gentle breeze, the salty air around her. It was calming. Maybe that was why she kept coming back here. With a sigh, she looked around and found that Derek was nowhere in sight. But farther along the beach, she could see Meredith leaning against the railing on the white beach house, staring out into the endless ocean. She looked so relaxed, so happy. It took her breath away.

Derek's words came back to her, despite her trying to ignore them. How was Meredith going to choose her when Derek was right in front of her? Why did her dreams constantly cause her so much heartache?

Meredith must have felt her staring because the blonde turned towards her and waved. And even from such a far distance, she knew the other woman was smiling.

Steeling her resolve, she made her way across the beach to where the woman of her dreams — literally — was waiting for her.

A/N: Let me know what you thought of this chapter!