Breaking news! Every active member of Critics United to be arrested and sentenced to death!
Everyone except Critics United said "hurray!"
"What do you mean by "active?"" asked an observant journalist. "No one in CU is active right now!"
Everyone laughed.
"Okay everyone that's ever worked for them then."
Everyone celebrated even harder!
The next day...
Barry Lawn opened the reviews of his latest fanfiction.
"Writing stories about John Phoenix like you've done here is not allowed on this website. If you don't consider changing your character you could face being reported and having this deleted by the admins of this site for rule violation. Hope this helps," said MrGoodyTwoShoes in the reviews.
MrGoodyTwoShoes was a member of Critics United! He was supposed to be arrested! How could he leave a review?
BarryLawn called the police. "John Phoenix investigate this."
John Phoenix went to the detention center. He asked to meet Goody. Goody came out. But it wasn't the Goody John Phoenix was expecting!
"Hey pal help me out pal they arrested the wrong guy pal!" said MrGoodyGumshoes.
"Those idiots arrested the wrong Goody!" said John Phoenix. "They'll pay for their mistake in court!"
So they went to court.
"Witness, testify against the defendant," said the judge.
Onecoolguy came to testify.
"MrGoodyTwoShoes is a nice guy he didn't do anything wrong," said onecoolguy.
"Objection!" John Phoenix presented Goody's affiliation with Critics United. "Critics United is a criminal organization, they're like a fanfiction-dot-net version of the mafia or the yakuza!"
"I'm sorry for my unacceptable behavior please don't ban me," said onecoolguy but the judge didn't care so onecoolguy got banned.
"Heh heh heh, I have you now, John Phoenix," said Winston Payne. "You've just proven your own client guilty!"
"OBJECTION!" shouted John Phoenix. This was it. It was time to turn the tides in his favor. "I didn't prove my client's guilt... because my client isn't actually MrGoodyTwoShoes!"
"What? How?" said the judge.
"Look closer at their names! My client is a clever little person who thinks flipping a "Two" with a "Gum" can fool people! You've been had!" said John Phoenix.
"Why, good heavens! You're right!" said the judge.
The police went to MrGoodyTwoShoes' house and arrested him and MrGoodyGumshoes was free!
"Thanks pal!" said MrGoodyGumshoes.
"Any time, old pal."