Jeremiah was gone before I woke up the next day. It would be just Conrad and I in the house until Steven and Taylor came back in two weeks. It didn't matter though, I had taken on as many shifts as possible to avoid Jeremiah, and unsurprisingly the rich patrons had been leaving really good tips. I had already replaced the money I had wasted in California, and all the money I would make now would just be for when I went back to school in the fall. I should take Tay shopping when she comes back for the fourth. I owe her that much after taking off on her.

I was getting ready for work when I caught sight of myself in the mirror. This was the first summer my skin wasn't suntanned. My hair was shorter than it had ever been, and I had started curling it often. I looked like my mom had at my age. The age she had met Susannah. It's funny to think of my moms life before they were friends, but even stranger to think of my life in comparison. Would I have a friendship like that? Would Taylor and I end up that close? Our kids best friends?

I used to think that it was Jeremiah and I. That we were the same as our mothers. And maybe we would have been, if we hadn't risked our friendship to be more. I looked at the picture I had taped on my mirror. It was all three boys and myself. It was taken maybe 5 years ago. And like in all of our pictures, I was looking up at Conrad. Poor baby Belly. Never would she have believed the mess we had gotten ourselves into. I took the picture down and put it in a shoe box in the closet. The time for summer romance was over. Will I come back here next summer? I had let Susannah down. The magic here was fading more and more each year without her here with us.. The thought was unbearable.

The next two weeks went quickly. I worked doubles as much as I could, picking up every shift when someone called in. I would see Conrad occasionally. When I would go for late night swims I would see him sitting on the edge watching me. He would have breakfast ready in the morning, and often left over dinner sitting out when I would get home late. We played in the charity volleyball game, and we won. We did house work together, Conrad cleaning the gutters as I weeded the flowerbeds. But we didn't talk. Not really, not like the night before Jere had left. We made small talk. Safe, easy topics only. It was nice in a way, but it was distant. And lonely. So when Hurricane Taylor hit, I was glad for the company. We did go shopping, and she organized an incredible party for the Fourth of July. My mom, Jere, Steven, Cam, Skye, and even Aunt Julia and the dads came out for the party. It felt so good having so many people in the beach house again.

After the week of the party, I went back to Philly with my mom. I wasn't running anymore, but being home with her felt like it was the right thing. We spent my month there watching old movies, and keeping the memory of Susannah alive in our hearts. It was the best part of the entire summer. When August came my dad drove me back to Finch, and Jere was there waiting to help move all my things into my dorm. We had a few of the same classes, and sometimes would study together. But it wasn't long before he had started seeing one of the guys from his fraternity. It hurt, but it also made things less awkward between us. It felt like closure. Taylor lived with her sorority, but she often visited the suite that Anika and I shared with our friends Shay and Lynn.

I had found a program to study abroad in Spain, so I spent all my free time working to keep my grades high enough to get in. It left little time to date, not that I was really interested in being with anyone at this point. When summer came back around, I left for Spain early. I didn't go back to Cousins at all that year, but I did get calls from everyone around the Fourth letting me know I was missed. When Steven video chatted with me, I saw Agnes in the background playing chess with Conrad, and I was glad that I hadn't gone. When Taylor called, she assured me that Agnes was hideous in person, and that it didn't even matter because they both claim to be just friends. She said they weren't even sharing a room. I knew what she was doing, and I loved her for lying even as I told her I didn't care. It was later that week that I had a package delivered to my apartment in Spain. Inside was Junior Mint. The note was short, but it was Conrad's neat handwriting. I hope this makes it by your birthday, so that you don't have to spend it alone.

It didn't. But the idea was sweet. I texted him when it had arrived to let him know I finally got it. The three dots popped up for a long time, but the only reply was a polar bear emoji.

For Christmas, I had several gifts from my parents, Steven, and Taylor. And a box with express shipping that had Mildred the giraffe in it. A note with the same neat handwriting. In case you forgot about the time I kicked your ass. Merry Christmas.

This time, I called to tell him he was cheap for regifting things I already had. Which caused him to laugh as I hadn't gotten him anything at all. We talked for a bit, but there was a 9 hour time difference, and he had finals that next day.

I wouldn't see any of them again until l I came home for Steven and Jere's graduations.