Chapter 48 Awakening
Senna realized that she was dying. This didn't scare her as much as it should have. At least she knew that Viola was safe.
Falling through the darkness was only scary when you resisted it. She knew this from experience. She had been here before. So she relaxed, allowing herself to be taken by the cold darkness that surrounded her.
Senna wasn't alone. There was a cloaked figure standing before her in the darkness. She felt a sense of unease, unsure of what this person wanted from her.
"Who are you?" she asked, her voice trembling slightly.
The figure didn't respond, but instead reached out a hand towards her. She hesitated momentarily before taking it, allowing the figure to guide her through the darkness. As they walked, Senna began to feel a strange energy emanating from the figure. It was warm and comforting, and very familiar. The figure guided her to a scene from her past.
In the first scene, Senna was five years old, and she scanned the murky body of water, searching for any signs of life. She desperately hoped to spot a fish swimming among the debris. The polluted water made it difficult to see, but she persisted. She waded through the muck, her feet sinking into the sludge with each step. The stench of rotting waste filled her nostrils, but she ignored it, her attention solely focused on her stomach twisting with hunger. Please let there be a fish somewhere in this murky body of water... Suddenly, the floor of the water opened up, and Senna sunk into its muddy grasp. Senna desperately tried to get out of the water, but each movement made her sink deeper. Her lungs burned for air. Her body had become weak from hunger, and she couldn't fight it much longer...
And then she was on the muddy river bank, gasping for breath, a much younger Clyde was hovering over her, his amber eyes observing her cooly. "Idiot." He chastised her. "The fish are on the other side, by the trees..."
And then the scene vanished. Senna looked up at the cloaked figure, and it just nodded to her, and with a wave of its covered hand, the second scene started to play. Now, she was seven years old, hiding in a makeshift tent out of dirty blankets and a blue tarp. She was not alone. There were two other orphans there with her, one about her age, and an older boy. They were huddled together in the freezing cold. White snow trickled through the hole in the tent.
"Maybe they'll let us in tomorrow." The other orphan whimpered.
"Maybe." Said the older boy, his voice quivering with cold.
She could see the kid next to her wasn't wearing any shoes, and his toes were an odd shade of purple. The other kid let out a pitiful wail of misery.
"Let's try this," The older boy said. Senna recognized him now, his name was Bones. "There is a certain way to breathe, and if you can do it, then you won't feel the cold anymore."
"H–How?" He whined.
"First, close your eyes." Bones said, "You imagine there is a big ball of warm light under the ground beneath you… and imagine you are breathing it into your stomach, and then hold it there for six seconds…"
As Senna lay on the ice-covered ground, she could feel the cold seeping into her bones, slowly numbing her body. She could feel her eyelids getting heavy as the snowflakes continued to fall around her through the holes in the tent. As her breathing slowed down, she finally let herself give in to the cold, letting it take over her completely. It was as if the cold was wrapping her in a blanket, lulling her into a peaceful sleep, where she wouldn't have to worry about anything anymore.
The figure shook its head and the scene vanished. Senna looked at the figure to see that it had begun immersing them into the third scene. Senna stumbled through the summer grass in the rural fields of her hometown, her throat prickling with heat and thirst. Suddenly, she felt a sharp sting on her leg. Looking down, she saw the telltale diamond pattern of a rattlesnake. Panic set in as she realized the danger of the situation. She knew she had limited time to get help. With a sense of urgency, she stumbled forward, hoping to find someone who could help her. The pain in her leg was intense, but she had wandered too far and was days away from help…
The painful scene vanished, and a fourth memory surfaced. Senna's heart pounded as she ran from the authorities. She could hear their angry shouts. She knew she had to keep running, but her legs felt heavy and her breath was coming in short gasps. She had stolen food from the baker one too many times, and they were on to her. She couldn't afford to slow down. The men descended on her, shouting. She scrambled to her feet and kept running, her heart racing with fear. She scaled the edge of the building and jumped to another rooftop. They couldn't possibly follow her here. But continued running, but then she lost her balance and fell from the edge. Senna closed her eyes before she hit the ground...
Just as Senna winced for the impact, the memory vanished. She was now nine years old and limping unseen in the dark alleyway. She vowed never to return to that wretched place again. Her back was raw and scabbing from the beating the nuns had given her days earlier. But it would hurt worse each day. Her wounds had begun to swell and ooze. Senna was sick and feverish, and she collapsed onto the dirty alley floor...
Senna thought she was a goner for sure, but suddenly, Bagman's voice pierced through the darkness. "There you have it, folks!" his voice boomed. "The winning points for the Preliminary Task goes to Brownwell's Senna Severus Snape!"
But Senna wasn't sure if the crowd had given her applause or not, her hearing was replaced with a loud ringing. Her vision grew blurry too.
Senna walked to the steps of the arena with as much grace as she could muster, but with the adrenaline wearing off, there was nothing stopping the heavy feeling from moving up her legs. Senna stumbled but grabbed onto the rail. The mark on her neck began to burn. It scorched her, getting hotter and hotter. Senna clasped her neck, Sinking her nails into her skin, trying to reach through and claw Malos.
Senna tried very hard to put one foot in front of the other, but her vision had begun to black out.
Senna was far too depleted to remain conscious. The mark burned as it tried to deplete her energy, but there was nothing left to drain. Was there?
'Mooore!' Malos hissed.
And though she was completely empty, it continued to drain, until the void began to consume her very existence…
Senna was very tired now. She thought this was certainly it. But the cloaked figure tugged on her hand, indicating they were not yet done. For the seventh time, the figure pulled out her most recent memory… She quickly stepped in front of Viola. She grabbed Viola, and with all her strength, pushed her to safety behind a nearby boulder.
And then the dragon's massive clawed arm made contact with her—hard. She felt all the air whoosh out of her lungs and a very sharp pain in her side. Screams erupted from the crowd, but it was drowned out by the sickening crunch of her own body. And then there was the ripping noise as the claw dug into her.
Before she lost consciousness, she heard the dragon roar triumphantly.
Her body tumbled down through the vast, open space, the wind whistling in her ears. She watched in terror as the blackness slowly crept toward her, its chilling embrace closing in around her like a sinister cloak. The darkness was so thick that she couldn't breathe. Her lungs burned. She plummeted helplessly into its abyss...
"Why are you showing me this?" Senna asked the cloaked figure.
But the figure remained silent.
"What do you want from me?" She pleaded now.
"I want you to see who you are." A soft voice echoed.
It seems that the cloaked figure was attempting to help Senna understand something deeper about herself.
She pondered this.
In the first scene, she was hungry and desperate for sustenance. As she sinks into the muddy water, she is rescued by Clyde, who chides her for her foolishness and points out that the fish are on the other side of the river. This memory taught her the importance of being resourceful and seeking guidance from those who have more experience.
The second scene takes place when Senna is seven years old and inside a makeshift tent with two other orphans. They are freezing in the cold, and Bones teaches them a breathing technique to help them feel warm. This memory had taught Senna the importance of resilience and the ability to find comfort in difficult situations.
In the third scene, Senna is bitten by a rattlesnake and must find help before it's too late. This memory taught Senna about the importance of seeking out help when in a dangerous or life-threatening situation.
In the fourth scene, Senna is running from the authorities after stealing food from a baker. This memory taught her about the consequences of her actions and the importance of making good choices.
In the fifth scene, Senna was sick and feverish after being beaten by the nuns. She collapsed in a dirty alleyway, and vowed never to return to the orphanage again. This memory taught her about the importance of standing up for herself and fighting against injustice.
In the sixth scene, Senna was crowned the winner of the Preliminary Task, but was disoriented and barely able to walk. Malos attempts to drain the last of her life force from her. This experience taught her about the importance of perseverance and the need to push through challenges.
In the seventh scene, Senna, who had been competing for the golden egg, turned her back on it and rushed to rescue Viola, who was in grave danger. As Senna risked her own life to save Viola's, she came to realize that there are things more precious than winning. This was a lesson on being true to one's desire and sacrifice.
These were each of the times she had very nearly died. Senna looked up at the cloaked figure. This must be Death herself. She had met Death before in each of these seven moments. That was why it seemed so familiar.
But what good were all these lessons now? Now that she was surely done for... this time, for good. Why didn't Death just take her? Senna turned to the cloaked figure again, "You want me to see who I am? I am just a stupid girl who wanted to–live."
The cloaked figure turned to her. "That is not all of you."
The hooded figure gracefully uncovered her cloak. Little by little, more of the mysterious figure was revealed, starting with her tall stature and then followed by her long, flowing hair that gently fell to her back. The cloak was fully removed now, and the figure stood confidently before her. She was beautiful and strong. Every part of the figure radiated determination and power. And it wasn't the fierceness that carried that air of power—but the gentleness. She looked both strong, and vulnerable. She looked like she was a loving person, immune to the harshness of the world that crushed those with big hearts.
Who was she? She was so stunning, she couldn't help but smile at her.
The figure smiled a breathtaking smile as she did.
Senna raised a hand to her, and the figure did the same. But where their fingers met, there was only cold glass.
Because she was looking in the mirror.
She was just a stupid girl who wanted to–love.
Senna smiled. She was happy, because it was enough. She was enough. She had always been enough.
This whole time, she was the one who got in her own way. She wasn't going to reach her full potential by practicing spells over and over again. She wasn't going to achieve greatness by just training until she was bloody and beaten.
It was both more complex than that–and more simple.
She just had to stop standing in her own way.
Senna stepped through the glass now, allowing her true self to merge with her…