My way's the Fun Way

Chapter 2

-Harry-

The compartment was filled with nothing but the sound of him and Dean laughing at his parting shot for a few moments before they heard running footsteps and a girl with bushy brown hair stood panting in the doorway "WHO QUOTED MONTY PYTHON?!" she yelled "I HEARD THE WORDS OF MY PEOPLE!"

He was silent for a second, as was Dean, before they shared a glance and the silence was shattered "Huzzah!" Dean exclaimed "A fellow lover of true entertainment!"

"It is so nice to meet someone with a brain." Harry beamed as he stood up and began shaking one of her hands energetically, Dean doing the same with the other one as the girl giggled.

"So, what caused you to use such a gloriously delivered line?" the girl asked as she sat down next to Dean and across from him "And who'd you even use it on?"

"I think a better first topic would be introductions." He said with a small grin as the girl flushed slightly. "I'm Harry, Harry Potter. My friend who's next to you is Dean Thomas. The brilliant owl in her cage there is Hedwig. And finally, this," he pulled Loki out of his hair "is my ninja Kitty Loki." Loki mewed in greeting.

"A pleasure." The girl said, shaking hands with Dean once more before stroking Hedwig's feathers and then scratching Loki's ears, the incredibly tiny cat purring up a storm. "And I'm Hermione," she said with a smile "Hermione Granger."

"Well Hermione," he nodded, his grin becoming a hair strained "to answer your earlier questions I was mocking my 'god brother' Neville Longbottom." Before explaining what Neville had done as well as his overall 'situation' with the Longbottom family. Hermione was understandably outraged at what the Longbottom's had done. The cabin fell into a slightly awkward silence for a few moments before he got an idea and gave a goblin like grin "Hey…how'd you two like to help me with something that will piss off every Pureblood supremist at Hogwarts?"

"Depends on what it is." Hermione said warily the same moment Dean exclaimed "Hell yes!"

"I'm voting that we go through Hogwarts…muggle style." He said with a grin and jazz hands "We constantly use Muggle references, we use muggle pens, wear muggle clothes, and to top it off…watch muggle media!"

"But Electronics don't work at Hogwarts or anywhere with a lot of magic." Hermione said with a frown as she looked down depressed.

"Actually, I looked into that," he said with a small grin "most people believe that because of the Ministry of Magic's 'study' but I didn't buy it, so I did my own. The problem isn't about magic stopping electronics…Purebloods just don't know how to change a battery."

All was silent for a few moments before two loud slaps echoed when Hermione and Dean both gave rather impressive face palms. "Wizard's first rule my friends," he said happily "people are stupid!"

"How can anyone be that dumb." Hermione groused before she gave him a vicious smirk "I am definitely in…so long as we go after a rather rude blonde Pureblood who called me a name that I believe is apparently a racial slur in the Magical world."

"What'd he call you?" he asked, hoping it wasn't what he thought it was.

"He called me a 'mudblood'." Hermione said with a small, confused frown causing him to snarl angrily.

"Okay…now I'm gonna kill him." He growled angrily as he moved to get up only for Dean and Hermione to pull him back down.

"Okay Harry," Dean said with a frown "what's the word mean and how do you even know it?"

"It's a pureblood insult geared towards Muggleborns." He said angrily "It's their way of saying that you are mud, your parents are mud, your grandparents, your brothers, sisters, aunts, uncles. Their way of saying that every damn person you're related too is mud and worthless because you don't come from an all-wizard family. My guardian explained it to me when I overheard someone use it in public."

Dean and Hermione froze before growing just as angry as he was, "I'll help you hide the body." Dean said seriously and tried to rise up along with him to go beat the arrogant prick before Hermione pulled them both down.

"Don't," Hermione ordered firmly "we can't go attacking him, we'd get in trouble." Making them both pout before she gave them a vicious smirk "So we'll just have to ruin life psychologically until the lesson is ground into his thick little skull."

"I knew I liked you for a reason." He said happily as they cackled and began plotting. Their plans greatly helped by the fact that he had his father's journals which were all full of prank notes and schematics, even instructions for how to build a 'Marauders Map' and the improvements made over the original model. Along with several secrets about Hogwarts that his father and their friends didn't find until after they'd made their original map.

Several hours later they were all walking out onto the platform at Hogsmede, their little group waving happily to Hagrid who waved back with a grin, before being divided into boats, a red-haired girl joining theirs to make four. Once everyone was settled into the boats Hagrid called for them to move forward as magic began to pull the small ships across the lake, Hagrid's booming voice carrying back to them "You'll be getting your first view of Hogwarts soon."

Sure enough, just after Hagrid finished speaking they rounded a corner and he lay eyes on the majesty castle and he couldn't think of any word to describe her other than glorious. The castle towered over the landscape, bathed in pale moonlight as ripples danced across her stone surface, reflected from the shimmering lake they journeyed across. Dozens of windows winked down at them, their gaze illuminated with the warmth of candles lit as the ancient structure seemed to almost smile down at them in a motherly welcoming fashion, as if to say 'welcome home, I've been waiting for you'.

"Wow." He breathed in awe, his jaw hanging loose as he stared at the twinkling structure, his words echoed by his shipmates.

After their boats pulled to a stop at the shore Hagrid stepped forward, glancing to make sure nobody fell into the lake, and then knocked against an oaken door with a loud cannon like boom. "The first years, Professor McGonagall." Hagrid said formally to the stern looking woman who opened the door.

"Thank you, Hagrid." The woman nodded gratefully despite her severe aura "I'll take them from here. All of you, come with me." She ordered as she led them through several corridors before ushering them into a room a decent distance from what he assumed was the main hall by the sounds coming from it. "I shall go make sure they are ready for you. You should use this time to make yourselves…presentable." The last part was said with a barely concealed grimace towards some of the first year he noticed were rather messy. With that though, the woman turned around and marched from the room.

All was silent as people nervously fixed their appearance until he noticed something out of the corner of his eye as he gaped "Dean…Hermione…" he said weakly as they turned towards him "I see dead people." Causing everyone to look where he was, several people he assumed were muggleborns screaming at the sight of the floating ghosts. The panic caused by the ghosts was quickly dispersed when people processed what he had said as well as the fact that the ghosts were having a jovial debate as several muggleborns began talking about the different houses with the specters.

"The hall is ready for your now." The voice of McGonagall spoke up, making him jump slightly as he hadn't heard the woman, she had to have the reflexes of a cat, before he followed her towards the Great Hall where, after listening to a freaking hat sing a song, they were told to let the hat be placed upon their heads to sort them.

He watched with admittedly little interest until Hermione was called up where she happily jogged up to the stool and jammed the hat on her head and seemed to be having an amusing conversation with the piece of felt if her expressions were anything to go by before it yelled out "Ravenclaw!" making him and Dean give overly manly cheers for their friend who rolled her eyes in amusement before going to join the house of the Eagles.

He again drifted out of focus until Neville was called up as he was curious as to what would happen. The hat had barely touched the prat's hair when the enchanted accessory recoiled and gave the staff what he assumed was supposed to be 'puppy eyes' "Do I have to sort him?" the hat asked as everyone gaped.

"Yes Mr. hat," Dumbledore said in exasperation "you have to sort all of the new students."

"But I don't wanna!" the hat whined as whispers started.

"You have to." Dumbledore said firmly, even if Harry could see the spark of amusement in the man's eyes.

"I could if I would, but I can't so I shan't." the hat sung smugly making him laugh along with Dean and Hermione.

"Then what do you suggest?" Professor McGonagall asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Let the Headmaster decide," the hat said instantly before turning grave "but I warn you, choose wisely."

"Just pick your House." Dumbledore told Neville as the spoiled brat instantly went over to Gryffindor.

"He choose…poorly." The hat said sadly before the sorting continued.

Eventually though he heard "Harry Potter!" as he walked up, idly noticing Neville's surprised expression before the hat's brim covered his face.

"Ah," the voice of the hat spoke inside his mind "I've been looking forward to sorting you and Mr. Thomas after meeting Ms. Granger. Such a delightful girl that one. Now I was originally going to sort the lot of you into Gryffindor due to the boldness of your plan. But then I found that little idea you all had about the seventh floor. It does indeed look like fun, I approve! If you ever need any help plotting, or just feel like keeping an old hat company, then just call out for one of the elves and tell them to bring me to you!"

"You got it my friend." He snickered in amusement as the hat seemed pleased.

"Anyway, we should still sort you. Hmmm, oh, you are ambitious with this project I must say. And quite clever in how you deal with those you don't like. Hopefully you can bring some respect back to this tarnished house. Slytherin!" the last word was shouted to the entire hall as many were gaping in shock as Harry handed the hat back to McGonagall and went over to his new table.

Dean was up next, having another lengthy conversation with the Hat before being placed into Gryffindor. Throughout the meal, he noted that one of the professors, a dark haired man with a hook nose, was giving him confused looks in between arguing with Professor Quirrell.

"Hey, Potter." An upper year had noticed too, "What's the deal with the looks Professor Snape is giving you?"

"That's Snape? Severus Snape?" Harry blinked at the name reveal before sighing, "I think I have an idea. He apparently went to Hogwarts alongside my parents." Feeling the letter inside his Robe, one he'd mentioned to Dumbledore who had told him he'd get a chance to deliver it at the Castle, Harry waited. Once the feast finished, he hung back for a moment, telling the Prefect about to lead them to their Common Room he had to speak to professor Snape for a moment.

"What do you want Potter?" Snape's expression wasn't a sneer but it wasn't far off either as Harry approached.

"I have a letter for you sir." Harry shrugged it off, the journals indicating more than a bit of bad blood between the man and his parents, "I found it in the ruins of my old home." He handed over the letter which had his mother's handwriting on the envelope, "It…well it looked like it was only just written before the attack." With that, he left the letter with the now shaken man and hurried back to the confused Prefect who'd been watching.