Chapter 39:

I decided to have Bella take a step forward with the Cullen children in this chapter, and make them start to understand her better. So, to warn you, this is mostly Bella and the young Cullens.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Tanya came to a steady stop outside of my house, and turned the car off after she put it into park. I turned my gaze to meet hers with a small smile that was returned by one of her own.

Wordlessly, we both leant forward and pressed our lips together softly. I hooked my hand behind her neck; keeping her in place to make our kiss last longer and deeper. Tanya complied whole-heartedly. She leaned forward to set her hand on my thigh and flexed her fingers on my leg.

The kiss didn't go any further, however, and stayed at the steady rhythm for a few more seconds before we pulled apart. The blonde drug her nose up my jawline, inhaling deeply. "I'll come to you tonight," she said. "Just keep your window open."

I nodded, leaning into her when her lips pressed against my skin. "It's always open for you," I murmured.

Tanya smiled, kissing my jaw again. "Possibly," she said, "but I still refuse to come unexpected."

"Something I find both annoying and strangely romantic."

She chuckled and kissed my cheekbone just under my eye. She did the same on the opposite side of my face, and then began to pepper kisses all over me. I giggled before her lips met mine once more in a final kiss. "Goodnight for now, moja láska."

I smiled and pecked her lips. "Night, Tan," I said. I pulled back and grinned. "I love you."

Her eyes lit up with her smile. "And I love you."

I couldn't stop myself from leaning forward and giving her one last kiss while my hand found the handle. I opened the door and pulled away from the kiss, smiling while I exited the car, and shut the door behind me. I could feel her watching me walk to the house making sure I was safe and most of the way inside the door before she drove off.

Another thing I found (slightly) annoying and strangely romantic.

I smiled to myself and closed the door behind me. I turned around to face the house. Charlie was sitting in the living room watching TV drinking a beer until he heard the door close and angled his head towards me. "Enjoy your day with Tanya?"

I nodded and walked forward with a smile. "Yeah, I did. She took me on a picnic in this rock area. It was really neat," I grinned.

He nodded with a small smile. "Sounds like a good time."

I nodded excitedly. "It was," I agreed. I sat down on the arm of the couch. "I think we both enjoyed having some alone time together. We won't get much of it now with both the Cullens and the La Push gang coming up here."

He nodded. "That's understandable," he said. He took a drink of his beer. "You need to get as much groping in as you can."

"Dad!"

He laughed. "I'm kidding, Bella," he said. He looked at me. "I'm not immune to the idea that you and Tanya are…exploring at least a little in your relationship. It's just what you do."

I shook my head. "I am not having this conversation with you."

"You already did."

"Then I'm ending it before it gets worse." I turned and headed up the stairs while he laughed on the couch. Leave it to Charlie to find an opportunity to mention sex between his daughter and her girlfriend. Even though he was awkward, he was a dad.

There was always room for that.

I rolled my eyes while disappearing in my room to gather my things for my shower. I shut the door behind me and began to peel off the layers of clothes covering me. I was taking off one of the many shirts when I heard, "You want help, Bella?"

I launched myself backwards into the door with a loud thud. The sound was much louder than the actual force of the hit itself, but it was enough to alarm both the occupants of the room and Charlie downstairs.

In a second, I found myself lying on my stomach stretched across my bed with my shirts up to show my back and a cool hand running over my skin. "Did you hurt yourself? We didn't mean to scare you," Alice fretted.

"Bells, are you alright?!" Charlie called up the stairs.

I grunted and pushed the hand off while calling, "I'm good!" I turned over to look at Alice, Jasper, Rosalie and Emmett. All four were crowded around my bed—Alice with one knee on it for examining me—and watched me carefully like I was about to spontaneously combust. "What are you doing here?"

Alice smiled happily, sitting down sideways on my bed. Rosalie ignored my question and leant forward to grab my face. "We're here to surprise you, silly!" Alice said.

Rosalie began to rotate my head. "I can see that, but what I mean is why you are here besides that," I said.

"Does your head hurt?" Rosalie asked.

I looked at the blonde confused. "What? No. I'm fine."

"Obviously we wanted to spend time alone with you without having to worry about having our time stolen from us…and without Edward sulking around," Emmett said cheerily. He gave his signature monkey grin at the end.

Rosalie held up her left index finger. "Follow my finger."

I looked at Emmett. "You do know Tanya will be coming over, right?"

"Of course she is," Jasper shrugged, "but that doesn't change the fact we want to reconnect. Besides, I think it would be good for us to be alone together without both families hanging around."

"But—"

Rosalie tapped my cheek with the hand still holding my face impatiently for my attention. "Bella, follow my finger," she ordered.

I rolled my eyes, but did as she asked while she moved it left and right. "Couldn't you wait to do that later?" I asked. "I'm pretty sure she won't be happy with it."

Emmett waved his hand dismissively and took my attention off Rosalie's finger. "Pfft…She has all the time with you she wants. It's our turn to get our time alone with you. Besides, the Denalis have had you all to themselves for long enough. It's our turn to be with our Bella on our own for once without them hovering."

I glanced at Emmett a little surprised with how jealous he actually did sound, for once. He usually was just smiling and hadn't done possessive so far, but I could see the frown on his face at the thoughts of his statement along with the other Cullens.

Vampires…

I was forced to look away by Rosalie snapping her fingers impatiently. I spluttered and smacked her hands away. "Rose, I'm fine, seriously. You can stop giving me a check-up like my doctors," I hissed.

Rosalie looked like she had just been punched or something, and I almost regretted my slapping of her hands until her eyes lit up and a smile took over her surprise. I frowned. "What?"

She purred happily. "You called me Rose."

I nodded, unsure exactly how that was relevant. "Uh, yeah?"

Her smile grew and she crawled to be seated next to me, wrapping her arms around me with a happy nuzzle. "You haven't called me that before," she purred. Honestly, I would have thought she was a little girl.

I shrugged. "Guess I never had a reason," I responded.

Rosalie just purred louder and nuzzled me again, not verbally responding while Jasper sat right behind Alice and gathered his mate in his arms. Emmett took the opportunity to take up the rest of the bed with a large dopey grin on his face.

"So," Alice said happily, "what should we do first?"

"Uh, talk?" Jasper suggested. "Like normal people do?"

"No, no," she chided him, "that's far too bland. We need something fun to do." She paused and then looked at me. "Of course, talking with you would never be boring, Bella."

I shrugged. "I'm awesome. Of course it wouldn't be."

Emmett sniggered before he shot up his hand. "Oh! We can play truth or dare," he grinned. "That way we could learn more about each other in a fun way while doing some stupid things as well."

Rosalie rested her head on my shoulder to regard her mate. "As long as it doesn't involve Bella being put in any kind of danger I'm alright with it," she said. She angled her head to look at me. "If that's alright with you, Bella?"

I shrugged. It wasn't like I had anything better to do. "Fine," I said. I shifted. "But can I get a few shirts off of me first, please? I'm burning up here."

"Of course." In two seconds—and a large blur—I was left in the light t-shirt I had worn under it all with the other clothes set neatly on my piano bench and my shoes under it with my many socks.

I blinked, looking at the group. "I know what my clothes feel like now."

The group smiled while Rosalie again made herself comfortable next to me with her arms wrapped around me. Emmett sat up. "I'll go first." He focused his eyes on me. "Bella, truth or dare?"

"Truth."

He leant forward. "Which family do you like better: the Denalis or us?"

I physically felt the vampires in the room lean forward for my answer and I coughed. "Uh…I meant dare," I said.

They groaned. "Oh, come on, Bella!" Alice called. "It's just an innocent answer. You won't hurt our feelings."

"Yeah," Emmett put in, "we have hearts of steel. We can take a rejection if it's fired at us." He pounded his fist on his chest over his heart.

I rolled my eyes. "You know that this is kind of an unfair question towards me," I said.

"But it is a question," Rosalie pressed. "And, since it is a question in this game, you need to answer it honestly. You did pick truth after all, so you have to give the truth. Otherwise, what is the point of the game?"

Damn, she had me there.

I sighed and shook my head, trying to find a way to even answer the question without lowering or raising any egos of either family. I took in a breath and shrugged. "I guess I feel more familiar with the Denalis," I said.

"Familiar doesn't count," Jasper pouted. "This is about who you like more and who you don't like."

I shrugged. "It does to me. I've spent more time with the Denalis recently, my mate is the leader of their coven, and they have been there for me for the past few months. I mean, they took me to my chemotherapy, my check-up and have let me stay at their house after a treatment and taken care of me. I haven't seen you guys for two years, and we haven't really connected much over the time you've been here to see how the other has changed. So, I'm more familiar with them than I am you."

I knew it was a softer way to answer it, but I still felt and saw shoulders sink in slight disappointment. They did seem to understand my reasoning, however. They couldn't say they had been there for me for the past few years or months—they left, after all, when I first found out my cancer was back.

They didn't have as much to say.

"That makes sense…I suppose," Rosalie grumbled.

"And that's why we're gonna be here now," Alice declared. She rested her hand on my knee. "We're not gonna leave you this time, Bella. We're gonna stay and we're gonna do just as much—if not more—than the Denalis do for you. I promise you that."

The others nodded in affirmative. "Always," Jasper swore. "Even if you need help getting out of your pajamas when you're an old lady, or need to change your diaper."

"Jasper!" Alice gasped.

Emmett burst into laughter.

I smiled at the blonde soldier and shifted in Rosalie's hold to rest more comfortably against the woman. Rose gave a small purr and nuzzled my hair gently before I cleared my throat. "Alright," I said, "I got one for all of you."

"Let's hear it," Alice urged. She turned to lean against Jasper and prop her feet up on my lap.

I cocked my head with a small smirk. "Which Denali do you hold the largest grudge against?" I asked. Their faces immediately fell into frowns. Aha! Payback.

"Do we only get to pick one?" Alice grumbled.

I rolled my eyes. "Come on, guys, be honest here," I urged. I smiled. "It is a game after all, and you have to be honest about it and tell me who it is and why. So, come on…Who is it?"

The group grumbled and then Rosalie hissed out, "The Denali sisters."

All three nodded in agreement, scowling. I glanced back at the blonde. "Really?" I asked surprised. "Including Tanya?"

Emmett nodded. "Yeah, Tanya's included in that," he said.

"Why?"

Alice snorted. "She has her hands all over you," she hissed, "and you are our little sister. I don't care if she is your mate or that I can see the future of you and her. I don't like it. I don't like how she's got her scent on you all of the time."

Jasper frowned. "Or her arousal towards you," he said. "I can feel it and smell it every time you're around even when you can't see it through her eyes. I don't like anyone feeling that towards my little sister—mate or no."

Emmett and Rosalie huffed in agreement with deep set scowls. I glanced around the group, realizing for the first time just how much the Cullens still saw me as their coven member. I had known they considered it—Rosalie and Esme especially—but the rest kept it down decently well until now when we were all alone together. It was like the polite filter was off.

I shifted uncomfortably at the realization. "What about Kate and Irina?"

"They think you're theirs," Rosalie hissed. "Kate gets on my nerves how much she rubs it in my face that she can say she loves you before you leave, hug you and call you her sister. If she isn't careful I will tear her arms off and feed them to her."

Emmett sneered. "Irina isn't much better," he grumbled. "She likes to sneak her scent on you all the time, or be at your side when Tanya isn't. I'm about ready to tie her three times around a tree."

I rolled my eyes. "You'll do no such thing, Emmett," I said.

"But she deserves it!" he protested. "We had you first and therefore I think we should be allowed to have more time with you! I'm tired of being second and having to hang back and watch them get to be around you and—"

"I'm not a goddamn toy, Emmett," I snapped. "You can't go whining about losing me, and saying you deserve me because you were with me first. You left me. You had a chance, but you gave that up at the first opportunity you had to drop the mic and walk the hell out."

His golden eyes widened and Rosalie squeezed me. "You know that's unfair, Bella. We left because—"

"I know why you left, Rosalie," I hissed. I pushed her arms off. "You left because you thought you could 'protect' me and keep me 'safe' from anything happening again. You forgot something important though." I moved off the bed slightly to glare at them. "I am human. I am a sick, weak human. You had nothing to protect me from. That incident was bound to happen sometime, and it was handled. You know what you left me with? Nothing. Fucking nothing."

Their heads ducked and Alice reached forward with a whimper. "Bella—"

I smacked her hand away. "No," I snapped. "I don't want to hear your excuses. I was sick as a kid, Alice. I was tormented by others. I was molded into the Bella Swan you knew in Forks by them. I was never me. I had nothing and no one for seventeen years until I moved to Forks and met you. I was in remission and had friends. I could walk down the hall and not be seen as that girl. I wasn't seen as the victim or the cancer patient. I was seen as someone, and not her."

Tears filled my eyes as I took in a shuttering breath. "You gave me a life. A life I never dreamed possible back in Phoenix. I could have a family and someone who loved me—people who protected me." I wiped away a single falling tear. "And then you…you leave me. You packed up and left. You took everything I had that day, Alice. I had just been told I could possibly die from my illness, and then you—the people and family I loved—took what hope I had left.

"I-I was left with nothing, because of you. I was a shell of myself. I had no reason to live anymore. I wanted to die. I wanted to just give up and let the cancer take me this time. I wanted to let it win." I wiped away two more tears. "And you know what? I would have…I would have let it win had it not been for Jacob—for the Pack and my father. I wouldn't be here with Tanya or the Denalis if it wasn't for them. I would-I would either be dead from my own hand or Victoria.

"They took me in when I needed them. They watched over me, gave me something that I had lost. They helped me want to live again. They made me see how I was worthy of living, how I did have an entire life to live right in front of me if I kept fighting. They were there for me when I needed them, and they protected me when Victoria came for me. They are my family—just as much as the Denalis are."

I wiped away more tears while they stared at me with lowered heads and venom tear filled eyes. "So, Emmett, I won't let any of you sit here and say that when you have given me no reason to let you near me. The only thing you have ever done good is break my heart to let me be me again, and that is all. Dammit, even Victoria—who set on vengeance for what you did to her—took pity on me before she died." I sniffled. "Give me a reason why I should trust you, Emmett, when all you and your family seem to do is bring me pain?"

He gave no answer. His gaze was locked down on the sheets with a deep frown. Rosalie took in a ragged breath while Alice covered her mouth to hold back a sob. Another tear leaked out of my eye.

Rosalie took in a breath. "You said…you said you didn't try to commit suicide," she finally whispered. "You said you didn't."

I snorted, wiping away the tear. "Yeah, well not trying doesn't mean I didn't think about it."

Rosalie closed her eyes and her bottom lip quivered. Jasper wrapped his arms around Alice and Emmett took hold of Rosalie, comforting his mate even though he looked close to venom tears himself. "Why, Bella?" Jasper whispered. "Why?"

I shrugged as my tears slowly stopped. "Why not?" I asked. "You heard what I said, Jasper. I had nothing. I had no purpose for all I was concerned, and to me it would just be the world without one less cancer victim."

"But you did have purpose," Alice sniffled. "We love you, Bella. We always have since we first met you. You-you had Charlie and Renee. You had…you had friends…"

I shook my head. "I became a loner after you left from my depression and Charlie couldn't do much. He was suffering from seeing me in such a state, and Renee wouldn't know what to do. I was alone."

Alice pulled away from Jasper to take my hand, pulling me forward despite my small objection. She cupped my face and stared hard into my eyes for a heartbeat, then pulled me into a tight hug. "You aren't alone anymore," she whispered. "I swear to you, Bella, we will never leave you again. I'll break away from the coven if I have to, but I will never leave you like that again. I'll always be here for you, and I promise that until you forgive us—forgive me—I won't stop fighting for the right to be near you."

I closed my eyes, unable to resist her embrace, and wrapped my arms around Alice to pull her closer. I had missed hugging the little pixie when I wanted to. Alice had been my best friend in Forks before Jacob, and I had missed her terribly.

I just hoped I could trust her now.

It took a few minutes for everyone to calm down from my tirade and the tears before we fell into a rough rhythm with each other. It was awkward for the first five minutes, then it began to smoothen out and I began to relax with the four Cullen children in my room.

I enjoyed spending time with them alone—I had forgotten how it felt—and having both Jasper and Rosalie in on it as well was far better. The two Hales actually had quite a sense of humor I never pegged them to have from Jasper either having his nose in a history book or Rosalie with her magazines.

It was nice to be able to relax with them and I soon found myself wrapped in Rosalie's arms again; nestled between her legs while she leant against my headboard. The position, surprisingly, was quite comfortable and I was enjoying it quite immensely (it still wasn't anything like Tanya's, though).

At least, I was until we were all chuckling at a comment Alice made about the wolves and we heard a throat clear. Our heads turned to find Tanya leaning against the wall with her arms crossed over her chest and a single brow raised quizzically.

"And what," she started lowly, "is going on here?" Her eyes swept over my entire bed before they fixed on Rosalie and me at the headboard with me wrapped in the woman's arms.

Rosalie shrugged setting her chin on my shoulder with an over innocent smile at Tanya. "Just some sibling bonding time," she said. "We thought we should have time alone with her while we could before the dogs arrived."

Tanya hummed. "I see," she strained. She focused her eyes on me and then said, "I believe Bella and I made plans for tonight, and I think we would both like to start them."

"Surely we could stay for a little longer?" Alice pushed smiling. "It wouldn't really be that big of a problem, would it?"

Tanya frowned. "It would be in my plans of being alone with my mate as much as possible before the smelly mutts arrive. Now, if you would, please…" She waved her hand expectantly towards the window.

The Cullens gave grunts of aggravation, but didn't argue with the leader. Rosalie kissed my head and squeezed me carefully from behind. "Mm…I'll see you later, Bells, okay?" she asked.

I nodded. "Alright, Rose," I agreed.

The blonde glanced at the coven leader watching the scene irritably and then rubbed her cheek on mine before she pulled away with a satisfied purr. Tanya was glaring daggers at Rosalie while she rose from the bed to let Emmett give me a hug.

"Bye-bye, Bella-Bear," he said.

"Bye, Emmett."

He—with extreme care—squeezed me before he let go and went to join his mate at the window. Alice attacked me next with a hug that was gentle for her and kissed both of my cheeks. "See you tomorrow, Bella!" she chirped, then got off the bed and headed for the window.

Jasper seemed hesitant at first, unsure what to do when I smiled at him and opened my arms. The man gave me an unsure smile, but moved forward to give me a quick and light hug. He sniffed my neck carefully, testing himself and then relaxed to hold me a little tighter.

I squeezed him. "Bye, Jasper."

"Goodbye, Bella," he drawled.

I smiled and released him to see his satisfied and proud smile before he moved off the bed to join his mate. The four nodded to Tanya and then disappeared with the coven leader watching them carefully from her post at the window.

After they were gone, she slowly turned her head towards me, and before I knew it had happened, I was lying on my back. Tanya straddled me, her hand pressed lightly against my collarbone with her face buried in my neck while she inhaled along the skin deeply. The tip of her nose lightly moved up and down the muscle in my neck and along my shoulder enough to make me shiver.

"Tanya?" I called lowly.

She took in another breath and hummed before pulling away with a pout. "You smell like them," she whined. Holy shit she sounded like a two year old.

I shrugged. "They were hugging me, you know? And Rosalie did hold me from behind," I reminded her gently.

She frowned. "That doesn't mean I have to like it," she argued. Rolling off of me, she sat on the edge of my bed and pulled me up to give me a small push. "Go shower, then we can cuddle."