Chapter 10

The Morning/Give Me Death

The following morning, after Robin's knighting and subsequent party, many of our heroes found themselves with terrible hangovers and splitting headaches. None more so than the one and only Sword of the Jedi, Jaina Solo. The moment she awoke and opened her eyes, she wished for a mercifully quick death. She groaned, thinking, "How much did I drink?"

Instead of a swift death, her mom brought her breakfast in bed. "How is she functioning, especially after last night? I know she drank more than me." Jaina marvelled at her mom's ability to handle pretty much anything. Then she realized she was late for the mission briefing; even if she was only going to observe, it wasn't professional. As she tried to raise herself up, her mother gently pushed her back to bed, (not that it took much effort in Jaina's current state). "Luke rescheduled the meeting, foreseeing something like this happening; it's tomorrow instead. Now eat and come down for morning Caf when you're feeling better. Your dad and I have some things to talk to you about," her mother said gently and quietly before retreating downstairs. Jaina ate her breakfast of eggs and bacon slowly. (Fact-greasy food helps with hangovers across the galaxy.)

Now, Jaina rarely procrastinates, but this particular morning she felt that she knew what her parents wanted to talk with her about. Robin Stace, prodigy of a Padawan, and now a full Knight in the eyes of the Order. Oh yeah, she also stole, not a kiss, but the first kiss from the roguish man of the hour last night, and after he returned it, she'd done what? Talk about it? Apologize? Act like an adult? No, she'd run without a word of explanation right after admitting she'd wanted to kiss him for quite a long time. She assumed that he was obviously going to be confused and possibly angry if he felt toyed with; she'd be confused and likely angry in his shoes. However much her dishonourable actions made her want to crawl into a hole, she knew that she couldn't escape her parents or the consequences of her actions.

Besides, Jaina was done running, from her duties as the Sword of the Jedi, from her botched engagement to Jagged Fell, which had really just been her way of burying her grief in any other feeling, but no longer. Jaina was a warrior and would comport herself accordingly, for fuck's sake. (A swear word that she'd picked up from Robin after he broke a toe the first time that they sparred). She was Jaina Solo, and if she ever felt compelled to run again, she'd punch her fear in the face. Feeling better, in a sense, and more like herself than she had in years, Jaina dressed, steeled herself, and headed downstairs for the inevitable talk with Mom and Dad.

Jaina went downstairs, acting like it was any other day, and she was just getting to her morning Caf, albeit with a terrible hangover. She sat down and flicked around holo-station frequencies for anything interesting or newsworthy when she felt it; the combined stares of both her mom and dad. Jaina simply turned in their direction after turning the holo display off. It was the polite and right thing to do.

Jaina began speaking with them with nonchalance. "Good morning, mom and dad. Thanks for the food, mom; it definitely helped," she said with a smile. "Good morning, sweetheart," her dad replied before taking a sip of his drink. "I'm glad you're feeling better. Want more?" her mother asked. Jaina shook her head a little, "no, I'm okay. Thanks though. So what do you want to talk about?" Jaina asked. "A few things centred around you mostly," her dad said, vague and cryptic. "My dad spends too much time with my uncle", she thought. Luckily her mom came to her rescue. "Han, she gets enough cryptic answers at work and from her instructors," she said to Han, who, while deflated a little, was in a strangely good mood; his bet with Luke was a secret among his family, and Robin hadn't really registered it the previous night based on their conversation. Even if Robin did remember that tidbit, Han knew that Robin was pretty chill and easygoing.

Her mom turned back to her. "It's not a bad thing, I swear. Honestly, what we want to say is that you seem happy. Happier anyway. At first, you were struggling, and we were worried, but you've been improving by leaps and bounds. We're happy for you, and frankly curious what you think it's from?" her mom asked, smiling brightly, while her dad did everything he could to avoid smiling for fear of laughter. He revelled in the fact that he knew something his Jedi wife and daughter didn't… finally! It only took two and a half decades. He wanted to savour the moment for as long as possible, and he wanted to avoid the embarrassment for Jaina's sake.

Jaina was taken aback. Had she really spiralled that badly? Yeah, she definitely had baggage, and it had overwhelmed her. It still did from time to time, but she had to admit she'd been in really bad shape for a while. The obvious thing that had changed in her life was Robin and Cindy, two very good, kind, and special people who she enjoyed being around. While it was true that she had stirring feelings for the younger Stace, she found it too convenient that the first guy that she liked in a more than friends kind of way was also the key out of her several-year-long funk. Then again, even if easy isn't the Jedi way, good things can still happen to good people, and she could simply be over-analyzing things.

Could one person have such power as to thaw her heart from its carbonite state and free her mind from its cage built of the regrets of her past? No, of course not, but it could show her that the door was already open and that her heart had thawed long ago. All he had done was give it a little reminder. Jaina smiled as she remembered the dance they'd shared and how everything else had been stripped away, leaving them as two luminous beings, momentarily transcending crude matter. It was cheesy, but it felt so very special. No words could really do it justice.

Her smile felt a touch forced because of her hangover, but it was genuine, warm, and, best of all, happy. "I haven't the foggiest idea," Jaina lied, something she rarely did. She felt like saying such things aloud might unmake the feeling, and she wanted to ride the wave a while longer. Once she had a word for this feeling, she'd tell them if they didn't already know. It was like love, only greater, deeper, and different, yet so similar. She had no doubt that it would be awkward, even difficult, but she would talk with Robin, and they'd work things out. She wasn't afraid to hope he reciprocated, even after her less-than-sterling moment last night, running from him without a word of explanation or even an apology.

She suddenly smiled more; she remembered that Robin was a bigger person than that, much bigger. A man like him wasn't so petty as to hold her actions from last night against her; he was understanding, compassionate, and forgiving by nature. That's one of the reasons why they became great friends so quickly, sharing similar qualities.

She realized that for such a feeling to exist, to begin with, it was without a doubt felt by the other party in some manner. She presumed that it was a Force-link of some kind, though nothing she'd studied or felt before. Jaina's usually talkative father spoke for only the second time that day. "Whatever you're going through is great; if it's a guy, just don't toy with him too much. I'm sure he's a good one if he caught your eye," her dad said knowingly. He used no names, merely glancing at her mom, yet she understood the silent message: "Don't make the man wait for too long. I know what it's like from personal experience." She replied with her own message-laced look, a simple: "Understood, and thanks." Jaina finished her Caf and went for a jog to chase away her remaining headache.

"She's okay," Han said before Leia could speak. "She kissed Robin last night, freaked herself out, and he seemed a little rattled. I smoothed things over; he's a good person who is very understanding. Living with a former princess, war leader, and senator, along with a Jedi, has turned me into a different kind of diplomat. You honestly thought that I would never learn… didn't you, Leia?" he asked playfully as he grabbed her and pulled her towards him. "Anything that you did learn was from me," she replied with a smirk, curious as to what Han would say in response. "No arguments here, Your Worshipfulness," he said in a serious tone, but with mischief in his eyes and a smile. "Love you too, you scruffy Nerf herder," she said, chuckling. "Who's scruffy looking?" Han replied before kissing his wife and basking in the knowledge that his daughter had recovered better than he'd initially thought; life was good.

But that very same morning, at the Skywalker home, life was not good. Not at this moment anyway, for it was the moment that Robin awoke in his bed to the worst hangover ever. His tongue felt like it was made of cotton, and it was a size too large for his mouth. He noticed a glass of water on his nightstand with a note: 'Drink upon waking. Come down when you're hungry. Luke'. Like Luke, it was simple and direct.

He guzzled down the glass of water, which made him feel a little better. Then he smelled it; breakfast. Robin showered and dressed quickly before making his way to the kitchen downstairs. He felt like living now, instead of wanting to eat a blaster bolt as he had when he initially woke up. When he arrived at the kitchen, he noticed that the Skywalkers looked haggard and a little strung out. He felt a little bit better knowing that he wasn't the only one. Misery loves company.

Robin sat down at the dining table. The last thing that he remembered was Luke rescheduling the mission briefing for tomorrow instead of today, "thank God," he thought to himself. He dug in, ravenously eating his breakfast like a starving man. By the time he started his second helping, he started to slow down. "Ben, you weren't drinking. Why do you look like crap?" Robin asked between bites. Ben tried to give Robin a look but winced halfway through. "Ben snuck off and convinced someone to give him a couple of drinks. Says one of the bartenders was very unprofessional and easy to manipulate. Now I know what to do for any future parties involving underage drinking and incompetent bartenders. Ben learned not to overindulge when drinking. You couldn't just wait a few more months, Ben, really?" Luke said, smirking at his son's obvious hangover headache. As a Jedi, Luke was very merciful, but as a parent, not so much. He knew when teachable moments occurred and used them brutally well.

"By the way, Einstein dragged your drunk body in, so you might be sore in weird places," Luke told Robin. "Nonsense, I was supremely gentle with you," Einstein telepathically said. "Thanks, buddy!" Robin replied as Einstein approached as any normal dog would in search of petting and food, enthusiastically grinning like a fool.

"So what's planned for today, Master Luke?" Robin asked as he scratched Einstein's ears. "One, I'm not your Master anymore now that you're a Knight, and two, today is R&R day. Do what you want." Luke told his former Apprentice and Padawan. "In that case, I'll go to the temple and get some piloting sims in. I've been meaning to go to the piloting club more. Maybe I'll spar after at the duelling club. In a few hours, when it's a little less bright," he decided, squinting in discomfort as light from outside struck his eyes.

Robin knew that he could use The Force as a hangover cure, certainly, but felt like that was cheating and an abuse of powers that were greater than himself. The Force wasn't his to wield for such trivialities; he was its conduit just like everyone else, nothing more, even if he was a Paladin King in the making.

He then remembered Jaina and him having a fairly intimate moment the previous night, including her running away right after. Han had filled in enough gaps to help him understand the situation a little better, and Robin was very patient. He'd wait as long as Jaina needed him to, and he wouldn't push.

Robin pondered how she was precious to him in a way he found nigh impossible to understand or explain, at least in words. Many who he'd met on this adventure had by all means been important to him, (An-Dru nonwithstanding,) and none were people who he could do without; but it was greater, or maybe vaster, than what he felt for the others. It was more than love; it was like The Force had a role in augmenting his feeling of love. Akin to ice cream dipped in chocolate, love, but greater. Robin knew a Force link of some kind was without a doubt forged between himself and Jaina though its nature remained unclear.

He'd always wondered why he'd been so easily connected to her; his longest relationship on Earth had been a week-long at max. A connection of such magnitude as this one was unheard of for Robin; he'd just seen it as having suitably high standards. His mum had always said, "Never settle for less than what you want and deserve." He knew that this was good advice and applicable to most things, not just romantic relationships.

"Master Luke, can you tell me what you felt when you fell for your wife? I'm sorry if it's a painful subject, but I need to know: when Force-users fall in love, is a Force-link born?" Robin tried describing his feelings from the previous night, how only they existed during their dance and the subsequent kiss on the balcony. The two men discussed matters of the heart. (Ben had left the room quickly after Luke got all wistful, recalling the day he fell for Mara Jade, Ben's mom. Your average teen, even Jedi teens, didn't want to hear mushy stories about their parents getting together, even if it was a really interesting story. At the time, the Empire was still going strong, and Mara had been tasked with killing Luke, the only real threat to the Empire by the Emperor himself, as she was the Emperor's Hand at the time. Long story short, she failed and retreated, and they met on opposite sides more than once, and slowly they fell deeper in love each time they crossed paths. Mara eventually defected from the Dark Side and the Empire, the rest is, as they say, history.)

"Sometimes a link is generated by the love of two strong Force-users, like Revan (pronounced reh-vn) and his wife Bastilla Shan (pronounced buh-sti-luh shaan.) Or myself and Mara (Mar-uh), though such connections are rare. I can't recall any that sound like yours and Jaina's. Han told me about last night in confidence; it's in the vault, so don't worry. You cost me a bet, you know." Luke said, with a chuckle and a wink. "You were the other person betting on me?" Robin asked, incredulous but too hungover for any anger or even indignation. "Only on who made the first move," Luke replied innocently before continuing on a more serious note. "Jaina can never know of this bet. A word of advice? Don't get her mad, and if you do, face it like an adult. It's faster and less painful that way." Luke cautioned, then slid a cup of caf to Robin; he'd need it to enjoy his R&R. Jedi aren't known to have many days off, and Robin would be no exception to this rule.

After a long day of R&R filled with club activities like simulation runs to improve as a pilot or improving his Form IV style of combat and learning about new ones, Robin was hellbent on one day mastering all seven classical lightsaber forms. He'd already almost mastered four, though if you include Vaapad, Jedi Master Mace Windu's specialty, you had eight total. "Almost halfway there," he thought as he finished up for the day, his form IV Ataru getting better each time he used it, as did his skill at form VII Juyo, though it was slow going.

The showers were empty, and nobody was expected to use the area for a few hours. Robin reached into his pocket and pulled out his spherical Holocron, The Master Holocron. He activated it the same way as before, yet it was different this time. This time, a holographic guardian was summoned after his scan had been completed, rather than a cliche female robotic voice. The guardian appeared to be a human male, though he wore a Mandalorian face mask. (pronounced man-duh-law-ree-uhn). They, the Mandalorians, could be seen as warriors who possessed lightsaber-proof metal and their own creed and culture, shrouded in mystery. (Jango Fett and Boba Fett wear Mandalorian armour for reference regarding appearance, and Boba Fett is the current leader of the Mandalorians.) The figure was, other than his mask, dressed as a Jedi. He was garbed in robes and a cloak similar to Robin's own, indicating his status as a Paladin leader. This new image had a voice, the charismatic voice of a leader, strong and confident. It was deep, but not too deep. A powerful voice that inspires allies with hope while instilling fear in enemies.

This great voice spoke to Robin: "You have started your journey to the final steps to be worthy of the Mantle of the Ruler of Paladins. I both commend you and weep for you. To wield the Power of the King, (which is an alternative way of saying to be a Paladin leader, with the implied greater power than most. To those who care to know, the reason this wasn't explained at the beginning when it was first introduced was that it would have been a huge spoiler,) is both a blessing and a curse. I was known as Revan, a name that resonated with me far more than my now-forgotten birth name. I was placed under a Sith Lord's spell that made me and my friends enemies of the Old Republic. My friend and I went to war to protect and liberate, but we returned as destroyers, as conquerors." Revan's recording took a moment to compose his thoughts, which allowed Robin time to digest the information before Revan continued.

"I found my way back to my true self, though it was not just me, but all of my friends standing with me that gave me the strength to continue. I fought my own love and returned her to herself, as she and my other allies had done for me, and then I did what I had to do, what only I could do. My friend Alec had long since died, though I'd hoped for so long that he was just buried under the shell of Darth Malek, former Apprentice to my Sith self and, at one point, my best friend and brother. In the end, I had to kill him. I considered it a mercy killing and still do, though it is no longer palatable for me. Alec was long gone, and in his place was a dangerous beast, beyond control and my responsibility to stop. My wife Bastilla and I were later with child, and expecting soon when I was... lost to time at the hands of the very Sith who initially turned me to the Dark Side, waking in the far-flung future, countless generations later. The Mantle of the Paladin King shed itself from me, for I had been forced off the mortal coil. For a time, I could not die, and agents of Balance cannot be immortal. I tell you this because Paladins must make difficult, sometimes painful decisions with far-reaching consequences. I killed my best friend out of necessity, and as a consequence of my actions, I was stripped from my life and made miserable in my limbo-like undying state, wherein my soul and body were existing independently; one was my darkness and the other, my light. But you're here to see what's next; my exploits are in the Archives, no doubt. Back to it."

"As far as worthiness goes... you're on the right track, provided that it's for the right reason. You and your Sword could do irreparable damage to more than you know if your bond were to become tainted. Not that it has happened before, but I must follow the rules and warn you all the same, as it's technically possible. I can see your potential future outcomes… even as I record this, which is why I know as much as I do about you. You have great resolve and a powerful foundation to have unlocked my message; you will not fall or fail in your duties. I don't look like it, but I'm very, very old, at least I was when I found out about the Paladins. I'm likely little more than dust in the wind, as it should be. Paladins were a myth, a legend… a whisper in the dark that made Sith children behave. I found this Holocron the same night I learned of the Paladins and my role." The Revan guardian paused before continuing. "I was flooded by memories and experiences that weren't my own; afterwards, I recorded myself. I can tell you that many generations of Paladins came and went in obscurity while this Holocron remained dormant," the guardian-Revan uttered with a little regret.

"Pity; it's harder to start from one. But it's not impossible; proximity alone will change those around you, altering them and helping them achieve balance both within and without. They will simply become what they were always meant to be. Paladins are free thinkers… nonconformists who strive for balance in all things, walking the line separating light and darkness. We represent… so very much. You're close. You'll succeed in reviving an ancient dynasty, one that is greatly needed. Even as I record this, I can see your many possible futures, and you're great in all of them, leading new Paladins in the war for Balance. Consult your Familiars, and while you are not pressed for time at this point in the Flow of Time, it would be wise to not stand idle either. I can advise you no more." The ancient Jedi Master turned Sith Lord, and eventually Paladin King told Robin before the hologram winked out of existence, the Holocron returning to Robin's outstretched hand.

Robin decided to consult his now-former Master, Luke, since he knew about some of Robin's lineage and dynasty. Though it was highly unlikely that he understood the role of Paladins, given the scarce amount of information available. Jedi clans were the things of ancient history, only now beginning to return to the galaxy, even if they numbered but one at the moment. Luke would be in his office at the Jedi Temple. Robin showered, dressed, and was on his way in twenty minutes.

Robin knocked at the door to Luke's office. "Do you have a moment, Master Luke?" Robin asked, ever the picture of politeness. "Please, come in. How can I help you, Robin?" Luke sounded desperate for a quick distraction from the current duties of his office. (What duties, you ask? The greatest evil of all: paperwork.)

"Well, sir, I came here to ask if you've discovered more about Paladins. Specifically, the rulers, though any information would help me." Luke looked at Robin apologetically. "Well, it's not much so far. Just an incomplete note reading that 'Paladins are self-made,' which could mean any number of things. However, I found mention of powerful force links similar to what you were inquiring about. It's a story, so it's not concrete, but it's something to start with."

"A Force link of the magnitude that you described is incredibly rare, and some were so powerful that they were said to have been forcibly weaponized, though how is still a mystery. The story claimed these links could form between any two individuals who 'completed the other.' Not unlike your world's Yin-Yang concept, it doesn't have to be related to love, just connection. Though it sounds like love is what you've got going on with Jaina," Luke said, smiling in contentment. He observed how they were well suited for one another, complementary..."Your niece is a wonderful friend and a lovely young woman… and I do feel love for her, but I'm not pressuring her. We're still friends. We'll talk when we talk." Robin said, affably.

Luke studied Robin briefly as he pondered the young man, and after a moment, he secured the room from outsiders and listening devices before speaking. Now was the time for absolute honesty on both sides. Luke looked at Robin and said, "You're going to bring the Paladans back, starting with Jaina." It wasn't a question, despite being phrased to sound like one. Robin nodded, though he hadn't given it conscious thought. Was Jaina meant to be a Paladin? "How's Paladin status gained? I admit I took you as a student because I thought you were prime Jedi material and would be an asset to the Jedi Order. Now it turns out that you're a link to a dynasty and legacy as old as the Jedi Order itself." Luke continued and was genuinely surprised at Robin's mellow, forthcoming attitude and he was incredibly curious about what he knew and was able to share. Jedi clans were a near-myth for him and pretty much anyone else unless they were thousands of years old.

"To be a Jedi Paladin is a mindset… one that most only achieve near death, when the trappings that we thought were important are stripped away, leaving only the truth. The Paladins had the perfect mindset to wield the Dark Side simultaneously with the Light Side without fear of corruption or madness. They were all nonconformists who served the whole Force rather than the government or ambitions of conquest, and they were incredibly rare and powerful individuals. I have… spiritual advisors, each representing an aspect of my being. Every Paladin had one. I have every Paladin leader's memories and experiences, from the beginning to now, though they still need sorting before access is actually viable as an option. The Holocron showed that the last to record themselves was a man named Revan, whom I've studied. He's labelled as a hero and a villain, a conqueror and liberator, a Jedi, and a Sith. Seems like the perfect nonconformist." Robin chuckled at Luke's statement. He doubted that a specific mindset was everything you needed to be a Paladin, but it felt like a good foundation.

"Ben has a gift you might find very illuminating if you have an interest in Revan and the many great influencers of the Force and Galactic history. Study this Paladin affair in your spare time, between missions, training, and classes." Luke suggested this pragmatically as he fished out a file for Robin. "Your mission for tomorrow… and your cover; it's all here. Your partner has been changed; Jaina will be your in-field backup with you instead of Ben. She'll know her part, and you can focus on yours. Professionalism will help you two get past the awkward silences." Luke finished, handing over the file.

Robin took the file, flipped through it, and turned back to Luke. "What about the opposition in the Jedi Council?" he asked Luke. "Oh, you don't want the mission?" Luke asked with a raised eyebrow. Robin mimed mock pain, holding his chest. "Please, Luke, you wound me. Of course, I'm taking the job. But the last thing I want is to cause you trouble; I can wait." Robin said. "If someone claims that you were treated with bias, I'm resigning from the Order. That's what I told the council, and whoever was stirring the pot shut up fast. Let me worry about the council. Half are in our corner anyway, and most of the others can be persuaded to at least not oppose you, even if they have some beef with me." Luke responded, making use of Earth vernacular, a new quirk courtesy of the Staces.

"I'm expecting someone soon; sorry, you seem to be helping me understand more than I am helping you... It's a real dynamic role reversal." Robin took the hint as a very polite dismissal. He'd review the dossier and prepare for it tonight. Robin took the file back with him to the Skywalker residence. It's better to err on the side of caution, he had reasoned, opening the file. "Hmm… very interesting," Robin muttered as he paced in his quarters, thinking of tomorrow's mission as he read. "This is definitely in my wheelhouse," he decided with a grin at the prospect of his first mission for the Jedi.