Angelica stalked towards Alexander's office. She had just finished checking on Eliza.
Eliza.
Poor sweet Eliza.
She didn't deserve this.
Her and the children didn't deserve this.
Her and the children were fine. Well, as fine as they could be. Eliza was heartbroken and wondering what she had done wrong to lead Alexander to cheating on her. The children, at least the younger ones, had no idea that Alexander had cheated on their mother and then published a 97 page pamphlet about it. The older ones knew of course. How could they not? It was one of the only things people gossiped about.
Scratch that, it was the only thing people gossiped about. Murmurs of "Poor Mrs. Hamilton." or variants of were heard on every street corner in Philadelphia, if not on every street corner in the rest of the United States.
Angelica, on the other hand, was angry. Sure, her heart felt for Eliza, having heard her younger sister's heartbreaking sobs as she laid in bed, on bed rest since she didn't want to harm her baby, but she was also angry. She was angry at herself, for letting Eliza marry the man. She was angry at Alexander, for having the audacity to cheat on his wife. He could have gone upstate with his wife and sister-in-law and seen the rest of the Schuyler family, but no, he just had to stay behind to figure out a debt plan and while doing so gained a mistress and cheat on his wife.
Angelica didn't bother knocking and threw the door to Alexander's office wide open, not caring if she had left a mark on the wall in her rage. She barely even took the time to respond to his greeting of "Angelica…?!"
She felt a small bit of satisfaction at his shock. Good, let him feel what she and Eliza had felt upon discovering he had not only the audacity to cheat on Eliza, but to publish it so the whole world learned about his indiscretion. "Alexander…" She greeted cooly, her anger barely contained as she spoke to the man that had broken her sister's heart. "Congratulations."
She ignored the way Alexander continued to stare at her in shock and was about to ask the very dumb question of 'what?' as his lips started to form the word. She didn't give him a chance to speak. He always spoke, but it was now her turn. He wouldn't get a chance to speak now, not if she got anything to say about it and she did.
"You have invented a new kind of stupid. A 'damage you can never undo' kind of stupid." She told him, tossing a copy of what had been dubbed 'The Reynolds Pamphlet' onto the man's desk so there was no mistake about what she was speaking of.
"An 'open all the cages in a zoo' kind of stupid." She added. "Truly you didn't think this through? Kind of stupid." She informed him, scowling down at him as she leaned over the desk and watched the man shrink away from her and her words. Good. He shouldn't have cheated on Eliza in the first place, but even if he had, he should realize how much worse his actions made everything by publishing every sordid detail of the affair.
She then stood up straight again, but continued to scowl down at the man. "Okay, let's review: you took a rumor a few - maybe two - people knew and refuted it by sharing an affair of which no one accused you!" Yes, being accused of embezzling government funds was awful, but just providing proof otherwise to the people accusing him of it would have been enough to eventually quell the rumor and keep everyone's relationships, legacies, and political standings intact. But no, he had to reveal that not only was he not embezzling government funds, he had cheated on his wife. His very pregnant wife, mind you.
"I begged you to take a break, you refused to!" She reminded him, not feeling the least bit sorry for the man whose political career and legacy was now in shambles. It was his own fault. Had he listened to her or Eliza and joined them upstate, none of this would be happening. Yes, his job as Treasury Secretary had been important and securing support for his financial plan was also important, but so was his family and securing the support could have been done remotely or better yet waited until after the summer. Especially since those who could, regardless of what their political positions or jobs were for the most part, had been clamoring to get out of the city and enjoy the coolness and openness of the country instead.
"You're so scared of what your enemies will do to you…yet you're the only enemy you ever seem to lose to! You know why Jefferson can do what he wants? Because he doesn't dignify schoolyard taunts with a response!" She knew it was a low blow to bring up the fact that Thomas Jefferson - Alexander had a very much known rivalry with the man after all - but it was a necessary one. People knew of Jefferson's affair with his slave Sally Hemmings after all, but the man didn't say anything about it, even though there were political cartoons depicting the relationship. If Jefferson could keep quiet about his own affairs outside of the marriage bed, then what made Alexander think it was even a remotely good idea to announce his to the whole world?
"So yeah, congratulations!" She spat at him.
"Angelica…"
She glared at him as Alexander had the audacity to attempt to speak again. She didn't want to hear whatever the hell it was that he was going to tell her.
"You've redefined your legacy, congratulations!" She reminded him, twisting the metaphorical knife she brandished at him deeper. She wanted to make him hurt. Make him hurt as much as he had hurt her. Hurt Eliza. Hurt their children. This was all his fault, after all.
She turned away from him, unable to look at him anymore as no more words came out. She was still angry, but she had nothing more to say to him at that moment.
Then he had to open his stupid mouth and attempt to defend himself. "It was an act of political sacrifice!" He told her.
She scoffed as she turned to face him again, her voice quiet. Quiet, but no less angry and her words no less deadly. He clearly was only going to say the wrong things. Nothing he could say would erase her anger. What was his political career compared to his marriage? Why had she let Eliza marry this man? It was clearly an awful idea, but her sister had loved the man.
"Sacrifice?" She said, as tears welled up in her eyes. "I languished in a loveless marriage in London." She reminded him, knowing her letters to him basically said as much. She had loved John at one point, or at the very least had made herself content with their marriage, but that moment wasn't now. There was a reason that she was back in the United States, after all, and it wasn't just because the man in front of her had had the audacity to cheat on Eliza. "I lived to only read your letters. I look at us and think, 'God, what have we done with our lives and what did it get us?' "
She took a moment to collect herself, picking up steam again. "That doesn't wipe the tears or the years away, but I'm back in the city and I'm here to stay. And you know what I'm here to do?"
She meant the question as a rhetorical one, but clearly Alexander thought that she wanted an actual answer. He reached across the desk and took her hand into his, speaking her name again. "Angelica…"
As much as his warm hand in hers brought her comfort previously, all it did now was make her anger boil again. She snatched her hand out of his grasp. She had loved him and the thing between them had still been going strong via the letters they sent each other. However, he had broken Eliza's heart and that was inexcusable.
"I'm not here for you…" She informed him, her tone once again turning as cold as it had been after she had barged into his office.
"I know my sister like I know my mind. You will never find anyone as trusting or as kind, and a million years ago she said to me 'this one's mine' so I stood by. Do you know why?!" It hurt now to think of that fateful night and how she could have taken ALexander for herself and possibly saved her sister from all this pain. She couldn't change the past however, but she could damn well make sure that Alexander never hurt Eliza again.
"I love my sister more than anything in this life!" That was true. She had seen the way Eliza had looked at Alexander and wanted to make her happy, hence why she had stood by in the first place. She would kill if it meant that Eliza was happy. The same went for Peggy. It was what being an older sister was. Sacrificing your own happiness to ensure your siblings were happy and loved and taken care of.
"I would choose her happiness over mine every time. Eliza is the best thing in our lives and never lose sight of the fact that you have been blessed with the best wife!" It was true. Her sister was too good for either of them, and she was sure that Alexander knew it.
Actually, she knew that he knew as when she said Eliza's name, Alexander mumbled it with wide eyes, as if the true weight of what he did sunk in and how he had hurt his wife. Good. If Eliza stayed with him, she would make sure that Alexander groveled for forgiveness if she had anything to say about it. Eliza was a saint compared to them and deserved better than either of them, but yet loved them both regardless. A love for Alexander that had now broken and wouldn't exactly be mended overnight.
"Congratulations, for the rest of your life! Every sacrifice you make for my sister. Give her the best life!" Prior to this, one could argue that he had. He showered Eliza in love and affection and their amount of children proved that love. He would now have to work harder than ever to get even a semblance of that back, and she was sure that he knew that.
"Congratulations!" She spat at him again before turning on her heel and stalking out of the Hamilton house. She had said everything she could for the moment and she was far too angry to continue to console her sister or her niece and nephews. Everything would be up to Eliza now as she was sure Alexander would soon be begging for her forgiveness as Angelica's words got through to him.
There was no cure for stupidity, but asking for forgiveness was a good way to attempt to mend things.