Uncle Chandler I Love You

by showtunediva

During the original airing of Friends I often dreamt of interacting with these characters. To honor Matthew Perry's memory I have decided to compile these dreams I had into a self insert character story about my character's relationship with her beloved Uncle Chandler, For context I was 11-18 years old during Seasons 2-10 of Friends.

17. Love And Sex Doesn't Always Equal Magic

Love and Sex Does Not Always Equal Magic.

Uncle Chandler I Love You Epilouge

Author's Notes: This chapter basically has nothing to do with anything related to Friends episodes. It is based on the celebrity crush I have had on Matthew Perry since December 1997 and also past ex boyfriends I have had that were very controlling and bought me over sexualized clothing. This story takes the place over the course of two days. Assume Chandler's AA meeting is on a Thursday night and they go to Canada on a Friday night. Title of this story is loosely based of the title of Justin Timberlake's song Love Sex Magic. One more thing: In real life I have been married for five years but in this story my self insert character is single so that way the relationship with Chandler and the choice to move in with Monica and Richard makes more sense.

In the nineteen years since Rachel left to go to Paris and her friends went their separate ways I have kept in touch with most of them sporadically. Rachel and Uncle Chandler and Auntie Monica have kept in touch with me the most.

Emma is now 21 and Jack and Erica are 19. I can't believe how fast they have grown up. I am so proud of them. Emma is a junior at Marymount Manhattan where she is studying Fashion Design. Jack is going to Johnson and Wales to study Culinary Arts and Erica is in Boston at BU studying journalism and international affairs. She is transferring to Ohio State next semester so she can bond with her birth mother Erica more and I will really miss her when she moves away. I recently visited Emma at college and loved hanging out with her. Central Perk has been closed for awhile and a new coffee shop has opened in it's place. We had a great time. She and her cousin Chandler who is one of Frank Jr and Alice's triplets are planning to start their own fashion magazine which I am so excited to learn more about.

Uncle Chandler has struggled for a long time with his drug addiction and alcoholism. My heart breaks for him all the time. I have gone to many AA meetings with him over the years and I remember one time a few years ago we went out for coffee at Starbucks after one of the meetings. He has also had a lot struggles with dealing with his sexual attraction toward me. I think while he has always been aware of how uncomfortable this made Auntie Monica and I feel he was unable to take control of his romantic feelings toward me. Auntie Monica and Uncle Chandler got divorced in 2004 and that's when Richard came into my life. Richard dated Auntie Monica during the first year I was visiting the apartments above Central Perk and I thought it was strange I never crossed paths with him during that time. Uncle Chandler bought a small ranch house fifteen minutes away from Monica and Richard's house and that's where I would visit him to baby sat Jack and Erica when I came home from college for the weekends. I loved helping him with the baby sitting and he was so good with Jack and Erica. It was almost like we were married but technically we weren't.

He took my hand gently. "Honey, I know you've been really worried about me."

I nodded and tears were in my eyes. "I've been worried about you for years Uncle Chandler, you know that. I'm more worried now than ever before."

"I wanted to let you know that the fact that you go to these meetings with me really means a lot to me."

"You're my best friend Uncle Chandler and I know that I'm yours. Everyone else is so worried about you too."

Uncle Chandler looked away. "I can guarantee that Auntie Monica and Richard are not worried about me. They could care less about me"

"What's wrong Uncle Chandler?"

Uncle Chandler sighed. "The co-parenting agreement for Jack and Erica has ended and Auntie Monica and Richard have full custody of them now."

My jaw dropped. "What? That can't be right."

Uncle Chandler sighed. "It absolutely is. Why do you think I wasn't at your college graduation?"

"What happened Uncle Chandler?"

"Erica doesn't trust me anymore honey."

"Why not?"

"I sexually assaulted her and Emma."

My jaw dropped in shock and horror. "Jesus Christ Uncle Chandler!"

"Auntie Monica and Richard and Uncle Ross and Rachel think I'm an idiot."

I sighed. " I can't say I blame them Uncle Chandler/ You betrayed their trust pretty terribly. Do you still talk to Phoebe and Uncle Mike and Uncle Joey?"

Uncle Chandler nodded. "They send their love. Uncle Joey is married now and he and his wife live in Brooklyn."

I exhaled happy with the change in conversation topic and smiled.. "I'm so happy for him. What's his wife's name?"

"Alexis. They want to take you out for dinner some time."

I grinned wider. "That would be great. I haven't seen Uncle Joey in a long time."

"Our bond has always meant a lot to me sweetheart... honestly I think our friendship has saved my life."

More tears gathered at the edges of my eyes... "Uncle Chandler..."

He put his finger to his lips. "Shhh... I don't want you to say anything for a few minutes." He got out of his seat and walked around to my side of the booth. He sat down next to me and pulled me to close to him into an embrace that was so familiar but not as warm about knowing about Erica and Emma's sexual assault.

"Baby angel, I love you so much. Always have and always will. " he whispered.

I nuzzled against his chest. "I love you too Uncle Chandler."

"Have you ever wondered why I call you my baby angel?" Uncle Chandler asked.

I nodded.

Uncle Chandler had tears in his eyes. "It's because over the years you've always stayed so positive and helped me to stay grounded in my sobriety. You've really kept me going for a long time... I would have given up after Janice cheated on me with her ex-husband if you had not come into my life."

Tears of shame flowed down my cheeks.

"Uncle Chandler, I think I have developed romantic feelings for you recently."

Uncle Chandler's eyes were filled with shock. " Are you serious?"

"Yes. I haven't told anyone else because I know they have been turned off by how your sexual attraction to me has developed toward me when I was fourteen."

Tears filled Uncle Chandler's eyes. "Baby, if I love you and you love me too what's the problem?:

I sighed " I regret telling you this Uncle Chandler after how you just told me you assaulted Erica and Emma. The age gap between us is an issue too. I whispered.

"Age is just a number baby. If we love each other nothing else matters."

"My self respect does Uncle Chandler."

His jaw dropped. " I wasn't expecting to hear that."

I exhaled. "Uncle Chandler when you drunkenly kissed me on your wedding day I was traumatized for about a year."

"Do you resent me for that honey?"

I sighed again. "Yes, I do Uncle Chandler but I have never stopped loving you,"

Uncle Chandler kissed my forehead. "I'm sorry for hurting you so long ago baby. Can we start over fresh?"

I nodded. "I'd like to try really hard to Uncle Chandler. Why do you call me your special girl?" I whispered.

"Because you are beautiful, smart,sweet and you care about me. Auntie Monica stopped caring about me a long time ago."

I sighed. "Auntie Monica probably resents you for how long you've had feelings for me Uncle Chandler."

"WHY CAN'T T YOU REALIZE I'VE WANTED TO MARRY YOU FOR THE PAST THREE FUCKING YEARS?!"

Other patrons started to stare at us.

"Lower your voice Uncle Chandler. People are staring at us."

"LET THEM FUCKING STARE!"

There were ten minutes of silence.

"I'm sorry honey. I don't mean to embarrass you, does that fact that I call you my special girl make you uncomfortable?"

My tear filled eyes met my uncle's. "No Uncle Chandler, not anymore."

"I'm so glad baby. I love you." My uncle repeated

I love you too Uncle Chandler. "I had a hard time forgiving myself for ruining your marriage to Auntie Monica too."

Uncle Chandler gently took my hand. "I know sweetheart. My idiotic behavior ruined my marriage and so did my addictions. Auntie Monica and I have never ever stopped loving you. Please stop feeling guilty, okay?"

"Okay."

Uncle Chandler kissed my cheek. "Did you want to step outside to call Auntie Monica honey?"

I nodded.

I stepped outside and punched in Auntie Monica's speed dial code. The call went directly to voicemail.

"Hi Auntie Monica, I wanted to let you know that Uncle Chandler told me everything about how he has feelings for me. I wanted to let you know that I'm sorry you're hurting. Call me back whenever you're ready to talk to me okay? I love you."

I got there in the booth and curled in to Uncle Chandler's side again.

"Do you feel better now honey?"

I nodded. "Umm Uncle Chandler do Jack and Erica know about us too?"

Uncle Chandler grimaced. "I'm sure they will soon."

"Do you think they will think I'm a slut?"

"Do you care about that?"

"I don't want my cousins not to love me anymore Uncle Chandler or lose respect for me either."

Uncle Chandler had a strange glow in his eyes. "Why do you care so much about other opinions? I sure don't."

My breath caught in my throat "Uncle Chandler can I ask you something?"

"What is it baby?"

"When I used to help you baby sit Jack and Erica when I came home from college I saw the look in your eyes when you saw me taking care of them. Um.. was that when you decided you wanted to marry me?"

Tears filled Uncle Chandler's eyes. "Yes honey. I fell in love with you even more back then. You did a fabulous job helping me take care of them. I want to have a child with you baby angel. I have thought for many years that we are soul mates."

I shrugged. "I'm not sure if we are soul mates Uncle Chandler."

"Don't be so hung up on our age gap honey."

I looked away embarrassed and met his eyes a few seconds later.

"You don't have to be afraid to admit you feelings for me honey. :Do you want to marry me?" Uncle Chandler repeated.

My breath caught in my throat and I couldn't believe what was coming out of my mouth when I finally spoke. "Yes, I do Uncle Chandler. I love you very much. I promise to take care of you for the rest of my life."

We sat there cuddled together in the Starbucks booth crying

I felt a gentle tap on my shoulder. A concerned barista handed me a folded up note and a pen. I took the note from her and opened it."

"Other patrons are concerned that this man is emotionally abusing you. Are you all right? Should we call the police?"

I wrote a reply. " I think I'll be all right. Thank you."

Uncle Chandler and I put our coats on. He took my hand gently and we headed toward the parking lot.

"Go home and grab an overnight bag. We are getting a hotel."

I nodded. "Okay Uncle Chandler."

I turned my key in the lock. "Hello, is anyone here?"

"I'm in the living room honey. " Richard said

Richard was sitting in his easy chair reading the evening newspaper.

"Did you have a good time with Uncle Chandler?"

I nodded. "We're getting a hotel room tonight."

Richard looked at me with alarm. ""I respect that you care about him honey but are you sure this is a good choice?

I looked at him. "I have fallen in love with him Richard." I whispered.

Richard exhaled. "Have Emma and Erica told you that Uncle Chandler sexually assaulted them?"

It was my turn to exhale "Uncle Chandler mentioned the sexual assault to me Richard and told me not to worry about it.. I have to admit I am slightly concerned that he never held himself accountable for his bad behavior."

Richard pulled me into his lap and held me close to him. "Your aunt and I do not trust him sweetheart. We really question your uncle's mental stability. We are frustrated that Grandpa Charles and Grandma Nora have not really done too much to help with Uncle Chandler's drug addiction."

My jaw dropped in surprise. "What? I didn't know that. Why don't they want to help?"

Richard squeezed my hand. "Finances, that's the bottom line. honey. They gave up on helping Uncle Chandler ten years ago because they were mentally and financially exhausted. He is a basically a teenager in an adult's body. Auntie Monica and I became his legal guardians in 2015 and we have felt this entire time like we have been raising three children., Jack, Erica and Uncle Chandler.""

I let out a low whistle. "Wow Richard, I am so sorry. Is that why I never see Grandpa Charles and Grandma Nora anymore?"

Richard looked at me sadly. "Absolutely. I am sure they would love to hear from you though. I still have their phone numbers. "

I got up and kissed his cheek gently. " That would be great Richard. I have really missed seeing them. I have to admit though. I am a little nervous."

"What' wrong honey?"

"Well I noticed at Starbucks that he has a temper.""

Richard nodded slowly. "He was also very verbally abusive toward Erica and Emma in addition to the sexual assault."

"What kind of behavior should I be aware of?"

"Unwanted massages and asking you to either massage or suck his penis."

I recoiled. "When I was younger he had me stroke his penis when were in apartment nineteen."

Richard's jaw dropped. "How long ago was that?"

I looked at the floor/ "The day Auntie Monica Rachel and I looked at the wedding venue at the museum."

" What? Why did you keep that a secret from us?"

I sighed. "I didn't Richard, Rachel caught me and Uncle Chandler alone together and she made me tell Auntie Monica what happened. I love you very much. I'll be okay, tonight I promise."

Richard let out a heavy sigh. "Have a great time. I love you too angel."

Once we checked into the hotel I got into my pajamas and turned on the hotel room tv.

"Is there anything good on? Uncle Chandler asked.

I flipped through the channels and finally found a movie on the Hallmark Channel. "This looks good to me."

Uncle Chandler got under the covers and pulled me close. "I have been waiting so long for this moment. No child custody restrictions can hold our relationship back now. Let's cuddle my precious love bug." he whispered.

I let out a content sigh and leaned into his embrace. I didn't say anything.

Uncle Chandler kissed the back of my neck softly. "Are you okay baby?"

My head moved down and nestled down deeper into his chest. I exhaled against his heart beat. "Of course. I love you Uncle Chandler.".

"Love you too sunshine girl. I am so happy we can finally be together."

A smile fluttered across my lips. "So am I, You always make me feel safe."

His hand gently grazed down to my inner thigh. " How does it make you feel?"

My breath caught in my throat again. because I was so shocked by him being so forward and intimate.

"I can stop if you feel uncomfortable." he whispered.

"No, it's fine."

"That's my girl." he whispered. He massaged my thigh for ten minutes.

:"How did that feel?"

My surprised eyes met his.. "It felt really nice Uncle Chandler. I didn't feel uncomfortable at all."

He smiled at me. "I'm so glad."

"Uncle Chandler, can I kiss you?"

"I've dreamed of this for so long... I'm sure you have too... of course it's okay"

My lips met his and fireworks were instant.

"That felt good didn't it? Uncle Chandler whispered.

My shyness went away. "Yes it did Uncle Chandler."

He returned my kiss passionately. "Let's go across the border to Canada and elope tomorrow, I don't think we should wait any longer to get married."

My jaw dropped in shock. "What's the hurry?"

"I have not been this happy since I got divorced from Auntie Monica. You light up my life."

My heart broke. "Oh Uncle Chandler, I'm sorry you've been hurting so badly for such a long time."

His lips meant mine again. and his tongue slipped down my throat. This lasted for ten minutes. When he came up for air. he smiled at me. "I've never felt so alive baby. Your kisses take all my pain away."

I cupped his chin in the palm of my hands and looked deep in his bright eyes that used to be so wounded. "I know that Uncle Chandler. I'm sorry that I have pushed you away for so long sweetheart. I am finally learning not be afraid."

"I'm so glad baby."

I returned his kiss and then hesitated.

Uncle Chandler's eyes met mine. "What's the matter honey?""

"Does the thigh massage give you pleasure too Uncle Chandler?"

His eyes lit up and he gently kissed my forehead. "Absolutely. Go ahead baby. Don't be shy."

My hand reached to his thigh and gently massaged it."

He moaned contentedly. "Don't stop angel."

This lasted for ten minutes.

His hand reached up behind my ear and he stroked it gently and then he started to suck on it.

I inhaled softly. "Uncle Chandler..." I moaned.

Does that hurt baby?" he asked.

"No... give me more sweetheart." I whispered

This lasted for ten minutes.

"Honey. can I stroke your dick like I did in apartment nineteen?"

"Give me a hard on baby."

I stroked until my arm was sore.

I fell back against his chest. " That was fantastic. I love you." I whispered.

Uncle Chandler massaged my shoulders. "I love you my too my angel. You are my everything."

"So how does sex feel?"

Uncle Chandler's eyes lit up. " Wonderful."

I looked away.

"Honey, if you want to make love you shouldn't be afraid?"

"But I am Uncle Chandler. I've never had sex before and I don't know what it feels like."

After five minutes of silence I started to cry.

Uncle Chandler pulled me close. "Oh my beautiful baby girl, please do not be afraid. I am not going to hurt you."

My scared eyes met his. "Really?"

"Do you remember a long time ago when were snuggling in your bed in Apartment 20?"

"Yes Uncle Chandler… after you broke up with Janice/

Uncle Chandler nodded. "That's right baby. I made you a promise then do you remember what it was?"

I nodded. "That you'd never ever hurt me ."

"I still absolutely mean that."

My lips met his passionately and my tongue slipped down his throat,

This lasted five minutes.

Uncle Chandler squeezed my hand gently. "Sunshine girl, are you ready to make love?

The fear in my eyes turned to adoration and I felt like I was sixteen again. " Give all your loving to me sweetheart." I whispered

And we made love for 20 wonderful minutes."

"Suck my dick." Chandler whispered once we finished making love.

:Alarm bells sounded in my head." "I don't think so Uncle Chandler.":

"Why not?"

"Richard mentioned that you did the same thing to Erica and Emma when you assaulted them."

"That bastard! You are much more mature than Erica and Emma are sweetheart and I have no doubt in my mind that you can handle this."

Uncle Chandler's eyes, which were filled with a strange energy met mine.

"Uncle Chandler….."

"Do not ask me any questions…. just suck and blow"

I nodded. My mouth wrapped around his penis and I sucked for ten minutes.

He gently rubbed my back. "Okay you can stop now."

I gagged. "Your semen tastes so gross in my mouth Uncle Chandler."

Uncle Chandler pushed my hair back from my forehead and kissed it gently.

"My sweet baby angel., Uncle Chandler could not be prouder of you. You did a great job making love and giving me pleasure. I love you."

"I love you too." I whispered.

"Please do it again."

Rage filled my eyes. No Uncle Chandler., absolutely not."

" You are so naughty for disobeying me.. I will spank you for not behaving."

I sighed. "Fine Uncle Chandler..:"

I turned around and he whapped my butt.

"Why did you decide not please me a second time?"

I ran to the bathroom in a split second to rinse his semen out of my mouth and then returned.

The rage was still fresh in my eyes. "Because you are being A PERVERT Uncle Chandler! What you just had me do was disgusting and inappropriate! And by the way this was not part of my fantasy at all… it mostly involved kissing and nothing kinky like this."

He was quiet for five minutes. "You can spank me if you think I am being naughty."

I rolled my eyes. "No Uncle Chandler. I am an adult. To be honest you are acting like a sex obsessed teenager and not your actual age which is fucking FIFTY TWO!"

I went to the bathroom to rinse my mouth out. When I came back my phone lit up with an incoming call from Auntie Monica. "It's Auntie Monica, Uncle Chandler."

Uncle Chandler massaged my shoulders. "Just answer the phone my beautiful baby. She knows that we are together and there is no need to be scared. I am right here."

"Hi Auntie Monica."

" Hi Honey, Please put the phone on speaker. Richard told me that you stopped by here earlier to get an overnight bag. We'd like to talk to you and Uncle Chandler with some concerns."

"Let me talk to her first Mom" I heard Erica say.

"Janine, are you a total fucking idiot?"

"Be nice to your godmother sweetheart." I heard Richard say.

"Screw you Richard, I am asking her a question and I deserve an answer."

I cleared my throat. No Erica, I'm not,"

:"So you are aware that bastard sexually assaulted Emma and I?"

My voice softened. "Of course I am sweetheart, I am so sorry that happened."

"I can almost guarantee that he will do the same thing to you if he didn't do it already He does not really want to marry you if that is what he actually has you believing. He is manipulating you."

"Go fuck yourself Erica." Uncle Chandler growled.

"You've already done that well enough yourself Chandler. I want you to stay away from me forever. If you see me walking in the neighborhood do not ever talk to me. Richard is a much better father to Jack and I then you ever fucking have been."

"Okay, Erica honey. That's enough." Auntie Monica whispered.

"Fine,if he rapes her I will not feel sorry for her at all."

"Hello Monica." Uncle Chandler said bitterly.

Auntie Monica cleared her throat. "Janine, I got your message. I wanted to let you know that I know this isn't your fault. We've all been aware of the weird sexual fantasy your uncle has been wrapped up in for years. I was clearly mistaken that the counseling with Dr. Weinburg has helped him to repress his sexual inclinations toward you and how obsessed he has always been with you. Have you been drinking Chandler?:"

Uncle Chandler groaned. "No Monica. I haven't We literally just went to Starbucks for coffee. I am completely sober. "

"There was no vodka in your coffee?" Richard asked.

"Jesus Christ. when did the two of you become my parents?" Uncle Chandler asked.

Auntie Monica let out an exasperated breath. " Chandler, you are the most frustrating person I have ever met in my entire life. I am left to assume that you have neglected to tell Janine that Richard and I have been you guardians for the past six years and that your parents are not in your life anymore"

"I did forget." Uncle Chandler whispered.

Auntie Monica exhaled. " 3 facts that are very important right now: One You are a sexual predator and have been one for over ten years. Your predatory behavior ruined our relationship and that's why I married Richard, two You need to hold yourself accountable for your disgusting behavior toward Erica and Emma and three You are putting Janine in an extremely similar dangerous situation."

"I am fine Auntie Monica, I promise." I whispered.

Richard cleared his throat. "Your aunt and I are really worried about you sweetheart. We don't trust Uncle Chandler 's behavior or his mental state based on how he has acted in the past."

"We were just watching a movie. I feel completely safe." I whispered.

Richard let out an exasperated sigh. That sense of security will not last long. Trust me honey, Chandler is manipulating you. You don't know what he is capable of and we most certainly do."

"He told me we are soul mates Richard." I whispered.

Auntie Monica snorted. "That's the funniest thing I've heard all night Given your age gap there is no way the two of you are soul mates."

"Auntie Monica, do you think that we are bonded through the past trauma he caused me?" I whispered.

"Is that what you and Dr. Weinburg have been talking about in counseling?" She asked.

I could feel Uncle Chandler breathing down my neck."

"Yes."

Auntie Monica exhaled. "Richard and I absolutely feel that way honey and that's why we are so worried about you. How do you feel about it?"

I exhaled "I partially do. I have had a crush on Uncle Chandler for three years too. I have been so afraid to tell you Auntie Monica."

Auntie Monica's voice softened. "Were you afraid to tell me because you thought I was going to hate you?"

"Yes."

"Honey, you shouldn't be afraid to tell me anything."

"I don't want you to hate me Auntie Monica."\

"I don't hate you baby."

There was an awkward ten minute silence.

"I'm capable of changing my mind Monica." Uncle Chandler snickered.

"You are a scum bag Chandler Bing!"

"Auntie Monica, do Jack and Erica know about me and Uncle Chandler being together?"

"Yes they do."

"Do they think I'm a slut?"

Auntie Monica's voiced cracked. "No, they don't. They know you'd never intentionally hurt them. They agree with me though that Uncle Chandler is trying to wrap you up in his weird sexual fantasy."

"Erica sounds really mad at me Auntie Monica."

"She's not angry honey just frustrated. She loves you and has been worried about you too."

Uncle Chandler kissed my cheek "See, I told you that you didn't need to be worried about that" he whispered.

I cleared my throat. "I'm not a baby Auntie Monica. I am mature enough to make my own decisions."

":At this exact moment I would have to wholeheartedly disagree with you when it comes to your level of maturity as well as your common sense. You are acting like you are a teenager not like you are in your mid thirties." Richard pointed out.

I rolled my eyes. "I dated twice in college Richard so this is not my first relationship. Treat me like a baby if you want to though. I don't fucking care."

"You will be grounded for a month when you get home. I'm sorry but I have to put my foot down. You and Uncle Chandler certainly seem to share the similar personality trait of being immature."

"Fine with me." I muttered.

Auntie Monica's voice trembled and I could tell she was about to cry. "You will always be the sweet curious girl I met in 1996 sweetheart. You, Uncle Chandler and I used to be a family."

"Auntie Monica, I do remember that well. While you and Uncle Chandler grew apart our relationship has always stayed strong. I will always love you, Richard, Jack and Erica no matter what. You are pretty much my second family."

"We love you too honey." Auntie Monica whispered.

I cleared my throat. "Uncle Chandler told me everything about how you have given up on his sobriety. I have always been there for him consistently especially more recently."

Richard cleared his throat again. "We have tried so hard to help Uncle Chandler in his path to sobriety Janine. It has put a lot of financial strain on Auntie Monica and I. That is something I'm sure you've been unaware of.

""Yes, Richard I understand about the financial ramifications of Uncle Chandler's sobriety."

Richard continued. "We truly wish the best for you Chandler. I need to be honest with you though we just can't handle how often you keep relapsing and the fact that you can't let this sick fantasy with Janine go is disturbing to say the least."

" I want to have a child with Janine Monica. She proved to me when she helped me baby sit Jack and Erica that she is good with children."

Auntie Monica exhaled. "You are no way in the right mental state to have a child with Janine Chandler…. especially since you are acting like one.. Would you let this ridiculous fantasy go? SHE IS 36 and YOU ARE 52!

"Please stop saying it is ridiculous. We have mutual feelings for each other Janine even confirmed that for you Monica.." Uncle Chandler said.

"Fuck you Chandler. You are using her for sex. Please stop fooling yourself."

"I am proud of her for giving me a blow job Monica.. she did amazing. Uncle Chandler hissed.

"You ARE SO INCREDIBLY MENTALLY UNSTABLE CHANDLER NOT TO MENTION A MOTHER FUCKING PERVERT! I will FUCKING KILL YOU IF YOU GET OUR NEICE PREGNANT! Monica and I will reserve all child custody rights to any child she does have!" Richard screamed/

I exhaled. " First of all. I am fine. His semen was disgusting in my mouth and I won't do it again."

"I spanked her for disobeying me." Uncle Chandler muttered.

I stared at him. "Your interruption was very rude Uncle Chandler. "Secondly, we are using protection Richard so I don't think that I will get pregnant."

Richard exhaled "Sometimes condoms do not always work. We will take you to the doctor to make sure that everything is all right."

I sighed. "Fine with me Richard."

Richard cleared his throat. "You are acting like a sex obsessed teenager Chandler and certainly not an adult. Janine is a young woman who deserves respect. You are certainly not treating her respectfully but instead like a sexual plaything. Do you think that you are Hugh Hefner and she is a playboy bunny?"

"I cannot answer that Richard."

Auntie Monica exhaled. "You definitely can Chandler and I can certainly say that you are in denial that you have been a sexual predator for twenty years. You should have gone to jail after our wedding if I am being honest. Aside from that what is your problem?"

"There is no problem. You gave up on me and gave up on our marriage. There is nothing left in our relationship for me Monica."

Auntie Monica was quiet.

"Are you there Auntie Monica?" I asked.

Auntie Monica exhaled. "This is something you and I can certainly agree about Chandler. Your daughter lost respect for you when you assaulted her and your son who admired you his whole life lost respect for you too."

Uncle Chandler sighed. "I was really hoping that the four of you would be supportive of our new relationship."

Auntie Monica exhaled. "What new relationship?"

"We're eloping Monica. I'm taking her to Canada tomorrow.:

"Jesus Christ Chandler... you need to stop this! It's insane. This is not a marriage. It is a one night stand."

"We love each other Monica." He kissed my neck gently and his hand sleekly slipped down my bra and massaged my breast. "Does that feel good baby?" he whispered.

I swatted him away. "Stop interrupting the phone conversation Uncle Chandler.. you are being so rude.".

"I'm her baby and she's my mama Monica I am ready for my breast feeding."

"UNCLE CHANDLER, I told you to stop fucking interrupting!"

Auntie Monica was in tears on the other end of the phone. "I can't believe that you would try that role playing game on her Chandler! Have you no shame at all? You are a perverted bastard and I fucking hate you."

"What is so bad about it Auntie Monica?" I whispered

Auntie Monica exhaled. "It's not the breast sucking that bothered me honey. It's the fact that he wanted me to act like his mother and nurse him like a newborn baby."

"You could have told me to stop Monica."

"Fuck you Chandler! I absolutely did tell you to stop and you wouldn't! That's why I had to get the restraining order which by the way you broke when you assaulted Erica and Emma."

Richard cleared his throat. "We have every right to call the police Chandler and will not hesitate to do so."

"YOU HAVE NO CONTROL OVER ME RICHARD! We are going to elope tomorrow and the two of you cannot stop us."

Richard inhaled sharply. Let me remind you again Chandler that Monica and I are your legal guardians which seems odd since you are fifty two years old. We have felt for the past six years that we have been raising three children you, Jack and Erica. Your behavior is really beginning to wear us out. Janine's parents entrust her in our care when she comes to visit New York and Monica and I can absolutely guarantee that they will not let you marry Janine based on your behavior with her twenty years ago."

Tears were starting to form at the edges of my eyes. "Thank you for protecting me Richard."
Richard's temper subsided. and his tone got a little bit calmer.

"You will always be our baby girl no matter how old you get honey. Please be sensible and realize Uncle Chandler is putting you in danger and we will absolutely not put it past him that he will rape you, get you pregnant or both."

"I don't appreciate that he wants to suck your breast sweetheart." Auntie Monica whispered.

"He's just teasing Auntie Monica."

"Honey, he definitely isn't. PLEASE LISTEN TO US! "

There was 20 minutes of silence.

"You should still have the decency to tell them instead of sneaking around like this." Auntie Monica pointed out.

I let out a sigh. "You're right Auntie Monica. Do you think they will be upset with me?"

"I would imagine they would be."

I looked at Uncle Chandler nervously. "She's right Uncle Chandler. I can't keep secrets from my parents." I whispered.

"I'll call her parents in the morning Mon and take care of everything before we go to Canada."

Auntie Monica let out another exasperated sigh. "Don't you get it? You won't be going to Canada. Her parents definitely will not allow this, You are emotionally abusing her by saying you are in love with her Chandler. YOU"RE NOT IN LOVE AND YOU ARE MOST CERTAINLY NOT SOULMATES!"

"LEAVE ME ALONE MONICA! Just accept the fact that I have moved on."

"I have every right to come that hotel to pick up Janine and take her home to Maine Chandler."

"Auntie Monica, I'm safe. I promise." I whispered.

Suddenly I wished I was home with Auntie Monica snuggled with her in bed. We had grown so close over the years and I affectionately called her Mama.

"Baby, Mama is so worried about you and wants you home. Please call me the minute you feel unsafe,

"Ok..:

"Mama and Richard love you so much."

"I love you too."

"SHE WON'T BE CALLING YOU BACK! GOODBYE MONICA!" Uncle Chandler

screamed,

Uncle Chandler grabbed my phone out of my hand and pressed the end button. "SHUT THAT DAMN THING OFF AND PUT IT AWAY!" he growled.

"Okay. I whispered.

There were fifteen minutes of silence.

Uncle Chandler put his arm around me. " "Why do you call her Mama any way?" he snickered;

" Do you recall the night you got engaged to Auntie Monica and what you said to me?"

"Vaguely."

"You said that your love for me was infinite Uncle Chandler. You and Auntie Monica have always been my second parents. That seems to be true for Auntie Monica. Is it still true for you?"

Uncle Chandler nodded.

I recoiled. " Then you have got to understand why Auntie Monica has every right to be upset Uncle Chandler. Do you think we are making a mistake and are you really using me for sex because you are angry at her?" New tears were at the edges my eyes."

"Would you change your mind about marrying me if my answer was yes?"

I turned away from him. Trust me after how you just made me fucking suck your penis I am starting to regret agreeing to this marriage."

Uncle Chandler got down on one knee. "Auntie Monica stopped loving me in 2006 sweetheart.. but you and I? We've always had a special connection. I will openly admit to you though that Auntie Monica is right about me using you for sex. I am angry at her because I will never see Jack and Erica ever again.""

I exhaled. "I agree with Richard that you are a pervert Uncle Chandler. I'm sorry to have to say that. I hope he does fucking kill you if you end up getting me pregnant."

"Don't you want to have a child with me?"

I nodded slowly.

"Blame it on my demons honey. I want to start over fresh with you and I promise to change my behavior for the better."

"I can't fully blame it on the alcohol Uncle Chandler since you didn't even have any tonight. You are acting on your perverted instincts and I really don't like you for that."

:

"I didn't hurt you tonight right? That shows you can still trust me."

I turned to face him. "You have not physically hurt me Uncle Chandler but the fact you are using me for sex hurts me horribly emotionally."

"Please don't leave me…. go to Canada with me tomorrow.

"Auntie Monica may not love you anymore Uncle Chandler but she still loves me. So does Richard. They just want me to be safe."

Uncle Chandler kissed my forehead. "You still are angel. I promise. Please stop worrying."

"The minute I feel threatened I am calling Auntie Monica and Richard to pick me up. I just wanted you to know that."

Uncle Chandler shook his head solemnly. "I understand baby angel. Don't you trust me that I would never hurt you?"

I nodded. "Of course I do Uncle Chandler."

There were fifteen minutes of silence.

Uncle Chandler pulled me close and his eyes were glowing with a strange type of energy. "I was not kidding about wanting to suck your breast."

I shivered but did not respond.

"It feels so nice baby please let me suck it."

I still did not reply.

His eyes were still glowing. "Pull up your shirt." he hissed

I recoiled again. "UNCLE CHANDLER, I AM GOING TO CALL AUNTIE MONICA BACK! SHE WAS SERIOUS ABOUT COMING TO PICK ME UP!"

""No, you won 't I am not letting you leave here. We are going to Canada to get married tomorrow!

"Do you think that my parents will let me go?"

Uncle Chandler nodded. "They should once they understand how much we want to be together."

I nodded. "Okay."

"I'm your baby and you're my mother. I'm thirsty." Uncle Chandler whined.

"Is this part of your fantasy Uncle Chandler?"

"Yes. Wasn't it part of yours?"

I shook my head. "No, my fantasy involves nothing kinky. That's why I want you to stop please.

Uncle Chandler shrugged. "This is not a kinky role play honey."

I stared at him. "Are you sure? Auntie Monica told me about it on the phone and it seems so weird."

"I promise."

I inhaled sharply. "This still seems inappropriate to me Uncle Chandler."

"PLEASE?!"

I didn't answer.

He reached up to my neck and touched my necklace. "I WILL TAKE THIS OFF AND THROW IT IN THE TRASH YOU OBVIOUSLY DO NOT LOVE ME!"

I slapped him "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU UNCLE CHANDLER?"

It was Uncle Chandler's turn to recoil. He started to cry.

"ANSWER MY DAMN QUESTION UNCLE CHANDLER!"!

"Honey, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. Please don't call Auntie Monica to pick you up. I want you to stay here."

"How come you did not listen when I said no the first time?"

"I don't know what got into me."

I shuddered. "I do. You are extremely horny and you can't keep your dick in your fucking pants. Uncle Chandler, the same thing happened when you drunkenly kissed me at your wedding. I think that what Auntie Monica said about the therapy with Dr. Weinberg not working for you was absolutely right. You are repeating the same type of behavior that you did 20 years ago.. To be honest you have really gotten a lot worse since then."

"I know honey. Do you accept my apology?"

I sighed. Yes, I do,"

"Can't you trust me?"

I turned away with tears in my eyes. "You have two strikes against you Uncle Chandler. I am really beginning to regret agreeing to this marriage."

Uncle Chandler pulled me into a hug and kissed the back of my neck passionately. "I have a present for you baby. I want you to wear it tomorrow on our honeymoon."

I blushed. "Thank you Uncle Chandler."

He handed me a box from Victoria's Secret. Your cousins Erica and Emma helped me pick this out for you."

I bristled. "Did that make them feel uncomfortable Uncle Chandler?"

"They never said anything. "

I exhaled. "They were probably scared of your temper Uncle Chandler and that's why didn't say anything. Why can't you accept the fact that you are a sexual predator?

Rage flashed across Uncle Chandler's eyes. "Open the damn present. Their opinion doesn't mater to me and it shouldn't matter to you either."

I opened the box slowly. Inside was a white lacy lingerie sleep top.

" It's very pretty."
"You complete my fantasy in this shirt baby angel." he whispered and licked his lips.

I gently put the shirt back in the box and my chest started to get tight. I started to hyperventilate.

Uncle Chandler's eyes grew worried. "Honey, are you having an anxiety attack?

I nodded and then ran to the bathroom and promptly threw up.

I felt Uncle Chandler's hand gently rubbing my back. "Sunshine girl, please tell me what's wrong. Did the shirt I gave you trigger a bad memory?"

Tears were in my eyes. "My ex boyfriend gave me a similar shirt and it really made me feel dehumanized. Are you trying to do the same thing?"

Uncle Chandler kissed my forehead. "Honey, I am so sorry your ex boyfriend made you so bad about yourself. I am not trying to do the same thing."

"Are you sure?:

"Absolutely. I love you baby angel."

I curled up in his lap. "I love you too."

His arms enveloped me and he carried me back to bed. Once he climbed under the covered he pulled me close to him.

"Uncle Chandler?"

"Yes honey,"

"Why didn't you tell me about the gaurdianship issues?"

Uncle Chandler sighed. "I didn't think it was important."

"It's important to me Uncle Chandler. You may not want to have a relationship with Grandma and Grandpa anymore but I do."

"They definitely do not support our marriage honey but they will always love you kno matter what.

"Can I ask you something else? Please be honest."

Uncle Chandler nodded and tears were in his eyes.

" How did Auntie Monica react when you told her that you drunkenly kissed me at your wedding."

Uncle Chandler started shaking but did not reply right away

I put my arm around him gently. "Sweetheart, your special girl is right here with you. I am always here for you. Please tell me what happened." I whispered.

"She slapped me across the face much like you did a few minutes ago and said that I was wrapped up in a sick and twisted sexual fantasy.:

"Does she still resent you for that?"

Uncle Chandler nodded slowly. "Why else do you think that she is so upset with me and doubting that the love the two of us have is genuine? Do you still think that I am in a sick and twisted sexual fantasy?:

My broken hearted uncle was sobbing and shaking in my arms like a scared child. I stroked his hair out of his eyes and kissed his forehead. "

"Shh.. my baby it's okay. I'm right here for you," I whispered

15 minutes of silence followed.

"Honey you didn't answer me." he whispered

I sighed. "I'm really not sure what to think about this whole sexual fantasy thing Chandler. Clearly our fantasies about each other have been very different. That's why I was so grossed out by sucking your penis earlier."

"You grew up before my eyes tonight baby angel and that's why I'm so proud of you. Your sexual journey will only expand once you allow me to suck your breast."

I exhaled. " Okay, I'll think about it some more."

We sat there for ten minutes and I rocked him back and forth rubbing his back.

Chandler climbed back under the covers. "Come to bed honey." he whispered.

I snuggled into his chest once again and his arms wrapped around me. "How are you feeling Chandler?" I whispered."

"Much better my love. Let's get some sleep okay?"

I clicked off my bedside lamp and then snuggled back in the embrace I had always felt safe in."

"I love you sweetheart." I whispered.

Chandler's lips met mine in a passionate kiss "I love you too baby angel. You are the sunshine of my life. I can't wait to start our life together."

"Do Rachel, Uncle Ross, Emma, Uncle Joey and Phoebe know about us yet Uncle Chandler?"

"No, they don't I want to go out to dinner with them after our honeymoon... is that okay with you?"

My heart dropped to the bottom of my chest. "Is our marriage going to ruin our relationships with everyone else?

"Everything is going to be fine."

I started to cry.

"Honey, I wish I could take your pain away. Please don't be scared okay?"

"I don't want to ruin my relationship with everyone else." I whispered.

"You aren't going to my beautiful baby."

"Really?" I looked at him with sincere adoration wanting to trust him again.

Chandler kissed my forehead. "Yes, really. .. You have my whole heart and I love you forever. Good night."

"Good night I shut my eyes and fell asleep.

The sun glistened through the hotel room curtains. I rolled over and looked at the alarm clock.. It read 9:15am.

Chandler rubbed my feet. "Good morning sleeping beauty." he whispered.

"Did you talk to my parents?"

"They seem to be more level headed then Auntie Monica.. that's for sure."

My eyes looked at him in surprise. "Are you serious?: They said yes?"

"I had to do a little bit of persuading but they seemed to understand that we have feelings for each other that are mutual."

"Did you explain the financial part too? That could be the what was upsetting Auntie Monica last night."

Chandler put his hand up. "Stop worrying about Auntie Monica, okay. Your parents gave me their blessing and we are heading to Canada in about one hour. Get dressed for breakfast.". Let's get going.

" Chandler.. this all happened so fast ... I don't have my passport with me, It's at home in Maine."

Chandler squeezed my hand. "Okay, we'll go down to the courthouse and get a marriage license then. We can go to Quebec afterwards for our honeymoon"

I looked at him in surprise. "I need my passport to go to Canada Chandler."

"I'm almost positive your old one is expired we can renew."

"That process usually takes about two weeks Chandler."

Chandler sent me an agitated glare. "I have a pillow and blanket for you in the backseat. The border control guards won't even notice you are there. Just take a nap and I'll wake you up when we get to Quebec."

"This is illegal Chandler and I think you know that."

His rage filled eyes continued to stare me down. "Just do as I tell you and before you know it we will be a married couple on our honeymoon. Stop being so anxious about everything."

"If you get arrested don't fucking blame me."

"Shut the fuck up okay?"

"Okay."

"I love you honey."

"Do you really?"\

"Yes, I do."

I sighed. "I have a hard time believing you Chandler but I really want to."

"Is this my third strike?"

I shook my head. "No, not yet but you are dangerously close to seeing this marriage end and I will not hesitate to have Auntie Monica and Richard pick me up."

"You can spank me for being naughty if you want."

"STOP IT CHANDLER! I'm serious!"

Chandler sighed. "All right, I promise to stop. I am really sorry for upsetting you baby."

"You fucking better be." I whispered.

Uncle Chandler kissed my forehead. "I can't wait to start our life together honey."

Tears gathered at the edges of my eyes. " : Neither can I. Chandler."

"Hey. don't cry okay? Everything is alright now." Chandler rubbed my shoulders.

I leaned against his chest even though I was still feeling a little nervous I was starting to feel safe again. "I was nervous but now you always know how to make me feel safe and stop second guessing myself. "

"I love you baby angel. We're going to be happy for the rest of our lives."

I kissed his lips passionately. " We absolutely will Chandler.. I love you too."

Uncle Chandler ended up being right about the border control guards checking the bag set. When we got to the hotel in Quebec it was about 2:15pm. We had room service bring up a salmon dinner with sparkling water up to the our room for our honeymoon dinner and ate on the balcony.

"Aren't you happy we're finally here?"

I nodded. "Love you." I whispered/

He kissed my lips passionately. " I love you too. Before you put on the shirt I gave you can I please suck your breast?

I sighed heavily. "Can you explain to me why this was part of your fantasy Chandler? "

He nodded. "Auntie Monica never let me pleasure her this way."

I recoiled. "Auntie Monica explained it to me on the phone. It sounds super weird."

"You make me feel young again honey so I wanted a second shot at this.

I shuddered and then sighed. "I personally feel you are taking the term "feeling young again" far too literally. Despite my extreme discomfort I will fulfill your fantasy. I'd do anything for you honey."

'"I'm the baby and your my mama,, hold my head while I suck."

I exhaled. "Okay."

Uncle Chandler climbed on top of me and his mouth clamped down on my left breast. I supported his head as he requested.. I could not look at him so I turned my head to the side, buried my head into my pillow and yelped in pain. This lasted for ten minutes.

Chandler dismounted and kissed my cheek gently/ " Baby loves his mama Janine. Chandler is so proud of you for doing so well in the roleplay."

"FUCK YOU!" I hissed. I went into the bathroom to put ice and aloe vera cream on the infected area."

"Honey, why are you crying?" Chandler asked.

"My breast fucking hurts Chandler. I had to put an ice cube and some cream on it because it is very sore. You sure got pleasure form this experience but I didn't"

Chandler pulled me close to him and kissed my neck passionately. "I'm sorry for hurting you baby."

I recoiled and pulled away from him. No, you fucking aren't sorry. I have every right to call Auntie Monica and Richard to come pick me up.

Chandler sent me an angry glare. "Now you are pissing me off. Have I made you feel unsafe or threatened?"

I turned away and didn't answer him.

"You are being very naughty again. I will spank you for not giving you a proper answer to my question."

I turned around and sent an angry glare back to him. " You are a pervert and a liar. You told me that you'd never hurt me. Well fuck you because you just did. I feel like you may have bruised one of my ribs too."

" I want more milk Mommy. Give me some."

"STOP IT CHANDLER! You are being so fucking gross!"

"WAHHH!:

I smacked him.

After recoiling he burst into tears.

"I don't buy those bullshit tears Chandler. You are emotionally manipulating me and I am fucking sick of it!"

"I'm so sorry honey."

I pulled down the covers on my side of the bed and buried myself underneath them.

"Boy were Richard and Auntie Monica right about you being mentally unstable Chandler. I am emotionally and mentally exhausted. Good night. I will see you in the morning."

I cried myself to sleep that night. The writing was on the wall that this marriage was the worst mistake I had ever made.

I woke up before Uncle Chandler and saw a voice mail from Auntie Monica.

Mama is so worried about baby. Please call me as soon as you get this message. I love you so much.

I texted her immediately. Good morning Auntie Monica. I didn't sleep at all last night/

Neither did I baby. Did Chandler try that breastfeeding role play on you?

Yes he did. I can see why you rejected him Auntie Monica.

Why didn''t you call me if you felt unsafe?"

He wouldn't let me leave Auntie Monica.

We are calling the Canadian police.

Okay. Is Uncle Chandler going to go to jail?"

We'll see what happens. Do you think he should go to counseling with us one more time on Monday afternoon? Dr. Weinberg has an opening at 3pm

I dabbed at my eyes. Yes

Okay. Please let Uncle Chandler know.

Okay.

We will be closing out the family therpay sessions since they clearly not helping Uncle Chandler.

Auntie Monica?

What is it honey?:

Do you agree with Dr. Weinberg's assessment that what bonds me to Uncle Chandler is the past trauma he caused me?"

Richard and I definitely do honey, That's why we really wished you had come home when we wanted you too. We really wanted you to get away from him.

He doesn't feel the same way.

He is delusional. Please do not believe anything that he says anymore.

What time are you picking me up?"

12:20

Okay. I love you Mama.

I love you too baby.

Uncle Chandler walked up behind me.. "Please don't tell me you are talking to Auntie Monica."

I nodded. " She told me that on Monday we have therapy with Dr. Weinburg at 3pm. Does that work for you?

"Absolutely. Shut your phone off please. We are going to breakfast now."

I nodded and put my phone in my purse.

There was ten minutes of silence and then he noticed my tear stained cheeks.

Chandler put his arm around me gently. "Baby angel, I have been worried about you all night."

"I barely slept at all."

"I know honey and that's why I'm so worried. Let's talk about it."

I exhaled. "Are you actually going to fucking listen to me Chandler?"

"Yes, I will."

I sighed "You might have gotten pleasure from sucking on my breast but I sure didn't That was the most uncomfortable and miserable the whole time."

Chandler was silent.

"Can I asked why you came up with the role playing game Chandler?"

Chandler exhaled. "My mom and I never had a good relationship when I was younger honey so in the role play I had you replace her. I felt safe and I never felt safe with her."

I exhaled. "In the past forty eight hours you have certainly acted more like my teenage brother instead of my fifty two year old Uncle, Uncle Chandler."

"I would have stopped if you had told me too." Chandler whispered.

I turned away from him . "I disagree with you wholeheartedly Chandler. At that moment you were definitely too wrapped up in your weird sexual fantasy to care about how I was feeling. I was having a horrible flashback to when you drunkenly kissed me at your wedding to Auntie Monica and my anxiety was at the highest level its been."

He pulled me close to him. "I'm sorry for hurting you so badly baby angel."

I exhaled. "I feel like our relationship is one sided Chandler and that my needs are not being met You need to try harder."

He nodded solemnly. "Okay baby. I promise."

My eyes met his. " My biggest wish Chandler is that you'd admit that you are a sexual predator. That would be such a relief to me. I told Auntie Monica about the role play. They are calling the police.

"Will they be coming here to question me?"

"Yes, I think being honest with them is very important."

I sighed. "Ok, well do you think that trying couples therapy with Dr. Weinberg will work?"

"I hope that it will"

:Okay."

Chandler nodded. "Will we have time to go to Urgent Care to see if they can see if your rib might be broken?

I paused. "Auntie Monica and Richard are picking me up at 12:20 so I am not sure if we will have too much time. Sometimes the waits can be long. You will have to text Auntie Monica to explain the situation and maybe we can go tomorrow morning."

"Are you actually going to fucking change your behavior?"

"Can't you trust me?"

I exhaled. "One thing I think you really need to work on in therapy is regaining my trust. That is the only way that this relationship will work,"

Chandler nodded. "Okay. Get ready for breakfast.

After breakfast I turned my phone back on and it exploded with text messages from Rachel, Emma and Erica asking if I was okay.

Erica's text message definitely was a little on the angry side.

""Why the fuck are you still with that pervert? You should have never gone to Canada and come home on Thursday night.

"He snuck me into Canada with out a passport.

So you are in another country illegally?"

Basically.

Fuck that idiot. Mom said she and Richard will see you at lunch time. They are really pissed at you. I don't blame them. They called the Canadian Police too and they will be there shortly after you leave the hotel to question Chandler.

Does he know?"

He will soon, I will see you later.

Okay.

Chandler touched my shoulder. " Did you know that the police are coming here to question me?"

I nodded. "Yes, I just got a text message from Erica. Auntie Monica and Richard are beyond furious with you Chandler."

Chandler sighed. "I know. They have every right to be. I am really sorry I got you in trouble with them"

I sighed. " We have a lot to work on in therapy with Dr. Weinberg Chandler."

Chandler looked at me sadly. "Prepare for the chance that I may not come home on Monday sweetheart."

"What do you mean?"

Chandler sighed. "I have a feeling I am going to go to jail today honey."

I glanced at him angrily. "I hate to say it but you fucking deserve it. We should have never gotten married in the first place Chandler. I really regret agreeing to this relationship."

Chandler pulled me into a tight hug. "I really am sorry for everything honey."

"You fucking better be." I whispered.

"Do you forgive me?"

I sighed. "It will take me a while but I really hope that I can."

The mini van pulled up in front of the hotel. Richard was in the driver's seat and Auntie Monica was in the passenger. I threw my suitcase in the trunk, opened the back passenger door and buckled my seat belt.

Auntie Monica's hand reached over the back of her seat and squeezed my hand gently.

"I have been so worried about you baby."

"I know Mama."

Richard cleared his throat. "It is our job to protect you whenever you come to visit. You should have called us the minute you felt unsafe with Chandler."

Tears were in my eyes. "I wanted to Richard.. trust me. He wouldn't let me leave when I told him I felt unsafe."
"He is manipulating you sweetheart and we do not like that." Richard said gruffly.

Auntie Monica kissed Richard's cheek softly. "Don't give her such a hard time Richard. She has just had quite a traumatic experience."

Richard glanced at me in the rearview mirror. "I will fucking kill him if he got you pregnant last night." he growled.

"He didn't I promise."

""How can you be so sure?"

"How can be so sure that he did get me pregnant?" I countered

"Don't be a smart ass with me young lady I am not in the mood for your sass." Richard said.

Auntie Monica turned around to face me. " Emma got pregnant when she was sexually assaulted by Chandler sweetheart. I wouldn't put it past him that he got you pregnant too. We will take you to the doctors soon to make sure everything is okay."

My jaw dropped. "What did she decide to do about the baby?"

Auntie Monica had tears in her eyes. " Emma had a hard time deciding if she wanted to keep the baby or not… ultimately she decided to get an abortion."

When Chandler gets back from being questioned by the Canadian Police we will not hesitate to take you back to the courthouse to get that marriage license revoked."

"He promised me he was going to work on changing his behavior." I whispered.

"That's a bullshit lie if I ever heard one Janine." Richard muttered.

I exhaled. "I think he's lying too to be honest Richard."

Auntie Monica exhaled. "We do not trust Chandler at all Janine. He lost our trust when he sexually assaulted Erica."

"Did Erica get pregnant too?"

"She ended up having a miscarriage at fourteen weeks."

My heart broke, "I'm so sorry to hear that Auntie Monica."

"Trust me, when Emma and Erica are ready to have children with a man that they trust then that will be a safe situation. Chandler put both of them is a very dangerous situation."

"Did he get them drunk?"

Yes, he did. Auntie Monica whispered.

I let out a low whistle. "Wow!"

"Uncle Chandler is a perverted pedophile and he should really go to jail." Richard said.

"Trust me, I asked to admit to this fact and he refused."

"In my opinion he blew his last chance when he sucked on your breast last night. You should have NEVER allowed that to happen. You should have also said no to sucking on his penis.." Richard said.

"What else do you want me to do Richard?" I asked,

Taking one hand out of the steering wheel Richard squeezed my hand.. not taking his eyes off of the road.

" I want you to be mature about this and realize that you made a mistake by marrying Uncle Chandler. He has been a motherfucking pedophile for twenty years and used you for sex for the past forty eight hours."

"Why can't you believe me that he is willing to change his behavior Richard?"

Auntie Monica squeezed my hand again. "If he had been willing to change his behavior he would have respected my restraining order but he didn't."

I sighed. "Yeah, he told me about the restraining order Auntie Monica. I'm really sorry he disrespected you like that."

"He told me he may have broken one of your ribs. We are going to stop at the Urgent Care on the way home to get it looked it. This should not wait until Monday."

I nodded. " Ok. Did he break the restraining order when he sexually assaulted Emma and Erica?"

"Yes he did and that's why Richard and I have full custody of Jack and Erica."

"Now do you see where I am coming from sweetheart?" Richard asked.

I sighed. "Yes, I do. Should we talk to Uncle Chandler about this together?"

Richard nodded. "We can certainly try. I don't think he will listen though, His opinion is the only that seems to matter. He doesn't seem to care about what anyone else thinks."

"He cares about me." I whispered.

Auntie Monica sighed. "He has been grooming you since 2001 honey. I wish you would accept his behavior for what it is and realize how perverted he has acted since you were fourteen. Our relationships with him went down the toilet once he drunkenly kissed you at our wedding."

I sighed. "You're absolutely right Auntie Monica."

"Can this conversation please end now?" I am getting a headache." Richard said.

"Sure Richard, no problem." I muttered. I leaned me head against the headrest shut my eyes and fell asleep.

When we got back to the house I immediately went to my room and started to unpack my suitcase. Richard entered my room and sat down on my bed.

"Have a seat Janine." he said

I nodded. "Okay."

Richard took my hand gently. "I'm sorry for being so hard on you honey. Your safety is all that I care about."

I had tears in my eyes. "Everything you said about Uncle Chandler is absolutely right Richard. He hurt me horribly the past two days and I don't think he is ever going to hold himself accountable for his behavior. You are like my second father. Uncle Chandler lost that title when drunkenly kissed me at his wedding to Auntie Monica.""

Richard opened his arms. "Come here, I'm so sorry you are hurting."

I fell into his embrace and he kissed the top of my head gently. "We will all get through this." he whispered.

"Am I still grounded for a month?"

Richard nodded "Yes, unfortunately that is not changing. If your judgment had been better in this situation then I would not have to treat you like a child. Do you understand me?"

I looked at my feet. "Yes, sir. I do. Deep down I've been really scared for the past couple of days and you have kept me calm Richard. Admittedly I really needed to be taken care of. Uncle Chandler may have shown that he still cares about me a little the past few days but I can see where you and Auntie Monica are coming from"

Richard kissed me forehead again. "I love you so much my beautiful baby girl." he whispered.

I nestled deeper into his embrace. "I love you too Richard."

"Rachel Uncle Ross and Emma are coming over at 5:30. Please be ready.

I nodded. "It is only 2:30. I'd like to take a nap if that's okay..:

"Auntie Monica is taking a nap too if you wanted to lie down with her."

I smiled. "Okay."

I walked down the hall to Auntie Monica and Richard's bedroom entered the room and crawled under the covers.

When Auntie Monica noticed I had gotten under the covers. her hand motioned to me.

"There's Mama's angel. Come here. You are safe my sweet baby, right here with me."

I curled into her side and wept

"I'm hurting so badly." I whispered

"Let those tears flow my precious girl. I am hurting just as much as you are."

"Why would he treat me like this Auntie Monica?" I whispered.

Auntie Monica rubbed my back. "I wish I had an answer for you. I'll never fucking understand his disgusting motivations for hurting you, me Erica or Emma.."

"He has hurt me both physically and emotionally Auntie Monica."

"I know my beautiful angel. I will never forgive him for how he has treated you so terribly."

" Personally I never will be able to forgive him. He told me the story behind the role playing game."

Shock filled Auntie Monica's eyes. "What did he say?"

"He said he never got enough attention or love from Grandma Nora as a baby and he felt safe with me and I was Grandma Nora's replacement in the role-play."

Auntie Monica let out a low whistle. "His need for closeness and affection should never ever be an excuse for breaking your rib sweetheart. That injury will take a while to heal."

I sighed. "You are absolutely right Auntie Monica. Personally I am not sure if I can ever forgive him for how much he has hurt me.

"He snuck me across the border to Quebec."

Auntie Monica stared at me. "What are you talking about?"

"I told him that it would take too long to get a new passport."

"He could have waited."

I sighed. "He wanted to rush everything Auntie Monica. I told him what he was doing was illegal but he would not listen. He said I was worrying too much."

"How did he mange you getting you over the border without a passport?"

" He had me hide under a blanket in the backseat and take a nap so they wouldn't see me."

"Did anyone in the hotel parking lot see you get out of the car?"

I shrugged. "Maybe. We didn't really notice."

"Do you think I am in an abusive marriage Auntie Monica?"

Auntie Monica nodded. Absolutely. That's why Richard and I have been so worried about you."

"Should the marriage license be revoked?"

"Yes baby girl. Your living situation with Uncle Chandler is definitely not safe."

"He was definitely using me for sex Auntie Monica. I don't trust him anymore after last night."

"Was any money missing from your wallet when you got home?" Auntie Monica asked.

I paused. "I haven't checked. Why?"

Auntie Monica let out a low whistle. "Uncle Chandler has stolen money from Rachel Uncle Ross and I to buy drugs and booze sweetheart. Richard and I are worried that he stole money from you this weekend. When we go back downstairs to start cooking dinner I want you to check to see if you have anything ,missing."

I nodded slowly. "Okay Auntie Monica. Do you really think that Uncle Chandler got me pregnant?

Auntie Monica sighed heavily. " We are not one hundred percent sure but we will take you to the doctors in another week or so to get you checked out. It is not safe for you to raise a child with Uncle Chandler but don't worry you have many other people to help you."

I nodded. "Okay."

" How about we get some sleep honey? I think we both need it."

I nodded and shut my eyes. "I love you Mama."

Auntie Monica's lips gently grazed my forehead again. "You are my everything baby girl. I love you too."

When Rachel Uncle Ross and Emma arrived for dinner Rachel pulled me into a hug.

"Honey, we have been so worried about you. Are you all right?" Rachel asked.

"I hope I will be." I whispered.

Uncle Ross's hand joined Rachel's on my back. "We'll never forgive Uncle Chandler for how he has hurt you Emma and Erica sweetheart. If he says that he loves you it is absolutely a lie. People who love you do not treat you like this."

"I think it will take me a while before I can trust someone else again after what Uncle Chandler did to me but I hope I get married someday and have another baby." Emma said.

Auntie Monica kissed Emma's forehead. "Richard and I have no doubts in our minds that you will honey. Let's eat. Everything is hot and ready."

"Did Uncle Chandler get you pregnant too Janine?" Emma asked.

I swallowed my green beans. " I don't know yet. On Monday I am going to the doctor to see if any thing is going on with that."

"Chandler is a scumbag and doesn't deserve to have a child of his own." Erica muttered.

Auntie Monica squeezed her hand under the table. "Do we all promise to help Janine raise her baby if she does end up being pregnant?"

Heads nodded around the table.

"I still think Chandler should go to prison. He doesn't deserve any type of happiness after how much hurt he has caused this family." Richard muttered.

Rachel nodded. "Ross and I completely agree with you about that Richard."

"Honey, have you heard anything from Chandler since you got home?" Auntie Monica asked.

I shook my head. "No. hopefully his interrogation with the Canadian police went okay."

I excused myself from the table and checked my text messages.

I saw a message from Chandler and my heart fell.

"Honey, the police interrogated me and I have confessed everything to them."

I typed back. "What's going to happen to our marriage Uncle Chandler?"

A sad face emoticon was in the chat.

"I am on house arrest at the sober living house because I violated Auntie Monica's restraining order when I assaulted Erica and Emma.. I should have never taken you to Canada since I took you there with out a pass port and you were there illegally."

"Is the marriage license getting revoked Uncle Chandler?"

"Yes it is. I will meet you Auntie Monica and Richard at the courthouse at 1pm on Monday. I am packing up our house after that to move into the sober living house apartments."

"Are you going to work on maintaining your sobriety in the sober living house Chandler"?

"Yes, I hope we can give our marriage another shot sweetheart."

I sighed. "I think you blew your chance Uncle Chandler. I'm sorry."

I was silent for a few minutes.

"Uncle Chandler, did you get me pregnant?"

"There's a good chance that I did honey. Are you going to going to the doctors to get things checked out?

Yes, Auntie Monica said she will take me the doctors to get things checked out."

" I don't know. Do you think you we will still be able to raise it together or will your addictions have too much of a negative impact?"

:I screwed things up with Jack and Erica sweetheart. Will you give me a chance?"

I clutched my phone to my chest. "Uncle Chandler, Richard was really angry at the idea that I might be pregnant with your child. He said he was going to kill you."

"I don't care if you show this text message to Auntie Monica sweetheart. You should be totally transparent with her."

"Okay."

"I have one more thing to say to you…"

I exhaled. "What is it?"

"I stole $45 from you this weekend and bought booze with it to have at the hotel room."

"How could you do that Uncle Chandler?"

"I'm sorry baby. I will pay you back. I promise."

"Auntie Monica said you stole from her Rachel and Uncle Ross too."

I know. Please tell them I will pay back soon okay?"

"Okay."

I went back to the dinner table.

"What did Uncle Chandler say honey?" Auntie Monica asked.

I handed my phone over to her. "You can read the whole conversation. He said I shouldn't keep anything a secret from you and Richard."

Auntie Monica gingerly took my phone out of my hand. When she saw the message about the potential pregnancy her eyes filled with rage. "I knew it. That fucking bastard!"

Richard's eyes met hers. "She's pregnant isn't she?"

Auntie Monica nodded. "He said it's very possible that she is. I still think we need to go to the doctors to see what is going on.

My heart fell to the bottom of my chest. "Should I get an abortion?" I whispered.

Richard shook his head. "No, we will keep our promise about helping you raise the baby."

I nodded. "Will I be allowed to visit him with the baby at the sober living house?"

Richard and Auntie Monica exchanged a glance between each other. ". Yes, we will allow that. Our policy is that you will be visiting him with the baby twice a week. I would also suggest keeping your purse guarded at all times so he does not steal money from you to buy drugs or alcohol. We will talk to your parents about you moving us with us permanently. Do you understand me?"

I nodded. "I absolutely do Richard. After spending so much time traveling back and forth to visit over the years I am happy that I will get to live with you on a more permanent basis."

Auntie Monica gave me my phone back. "I am glad he will be giving you back the money he stole from you and that he will be paying us back too."

On her way to the kitchen to call Uncle Chandler Auntie Monica kissed my forehead softly. "We all love you so much princess. We can't wait for you to live with us forever. You have always felt like family to all of us."

"I love you too Auntie Monica."

My one night marriage to Chandler was on May 27th 2021.. He's been in the sober living house ever since then. Eight months later in January 2022 our son Joseph Chandler Bing was born at 12 pounds 8 ounces delivered through C section.. Chandler is very understanding about the child custody limitations and he has own apartment at the sober living house which we visit him at twice a week from four to seven pm

Earlier this spring during one of our visits Chandler was bouncing Joey up and down on his knee in his easy chair.

"Daddy!" Joey squealed.

A smile came across Chandler's lips. "Daddy loves you so much baby boy." his lips gently grazed his forehead.

My eyes were watery. "We have a great little family don't we?"

Chandler's eyes met mine. "Yes we do and I am so grateful the child custody agreement has allowed me to see our sweet boy.. This is the life I always dreamt about."

"Daddy and Mommy, I love you." Joey said,

"We love you too baby." I whispered.

Chandler reached out and grabbed my hand. "Honey, I wanted to let you know that you will outlive me and I will not get to see our son grow up?"

My jaw dropped in shock. "What are you talking about?"

Joey looked at Chandler with worry. "Daddy is sad?"

Chandler handed our son back to me and his eyes met both of ours sadly."

"Yes sweetheart, Daddy is very sad."

"Why?"

I held my son close to me. "Daddy has been sick for a long time baby and he's not going to get better.. I'm really sorry."

Chandler sighed. "My body can not take any more abuse from the drugs and alcohol."

"Are you saying you're going to die?"

Chandler nodded. "To be honest given the abuse I have done to my body over the years I am really shocked I have lived this long. My heart is not strong enough."

There were ten minutes of silence

Chandler exhaled "I have a few regrets to share with you."

"Okay."

Chandler squeezed my hand. "I have loved you this whole time sweetheart but I need to be open and honest with you I have been using you for sex this whole time and stealing money from you to buy drugs and booze."

"How could you Chandler?"

Joey looked at Chandler. "Daddy was mean to Mommy?"

Chandler looked at our son with sadness in his eyes. "Yes baby, Daddy was very mean to Mommy."

"I was ashamed to tell you because I didn't want you to leave me because I knew I would lose custody of our beautiful son Joseph Chandler."

Rage filled my eyes. "You are such a bastard. What's your second regret?"

Chandler exhaled again . "I have hurt four people that I love the most in the world and regret my actions. You., Auntie Monica, Erica and Emma. I hope you all can forgive me for how I have treated you."

I sighed. "I forgive you sweetheart. I'm sure they will too."

"Why are you so upset with me?"

"Can you blame me? You just told me you've used me from sex this whole time. I should have gotten full custody of Joey because you are certainly not a good role model for him. I have many other people that can help me with raising him."

Chandler sighed. "No, I absolutely don't blame you. If I were you. when I told you I stole money from you on our honeymoon I would have cut off all communication with me. Is that what you wanted to do?"

I looked at him in shock, "Yes, absolutely. I felt guilty about you dying alone though and that's why I decided to give you the benefit of the doubt."

Chandler kissed my lips gently. "Honey bunch, believe me after all the bad things I've done to the people I love for the past twenty years dying alone is probably what I deserve.

I recoiled. . "I should have never ever gone with you to that hotel room when you asked me to marry you. You didn't know this but the Starbucks barista handed me a note asking me if I was okay. I said I was okay but you should have gone to jail and I should have taken a taxi home.. Our marriage was definitely not a reality. It has been a sick fantasy of yours which led to Auntie Monica divorcing you and you not having a relationship with Jack and Erica. Why did it take you such a long time to admit that you were a sexual predator?"

Chandler sighed. "I was stupid for not holding myself accountable for my bad behavior."

"You would have saved everyone else so much fucking pain if you had cut ties with our family after you drunkenly kissed me at your wedding to Auntie Monica. You should have gone to jail after that Chandler."

There a five minute pause.

"Would say that the therapy with Dr. Weinburg has been helpful?"

Chandler exhaled. "No, I if I had followed through with she wanted me to do then we would not be in this position. My addictions not only destroyed my relationships with you Auntie Monica, Jack and Erica but also with Grandpa Charles and Grandma Nora."

I nodded slowly. "Everyone loved you so much Chandler. So much money was wasted on therapy and putting you through rehab…. nothing seemed to work for you."

Chandler sighed. " I know baby. Trust me, I do not blame you for being upset."

There was five minutes of silence

"I love you." Chandler whispered.

I stood up and walked to the coat closet and slipped in to my jacket and started to gather together Joey's diaper bag and strapped in my son into his car seat. I punched in Auntie Monica's speed dial code.

"Going home?" Joey asked.

I nodded. "Yes baby. It's time for you to go to bed. Auntie Monica will be picking us up soon."

"Hi sweetheart, Is your visit with Chandler over?"

"Yes it is . He said he regrets how he treated you me Erica and Emma. He was wondering if you forgive him"

There was silence.

"Auntie Monica?"

" Yes we do forgive him. I'm on my way to pick you up."

"Okay, I will meet you in the lobby."

I kissed Chandler's forehead. "Auntie Monica says that they forgive you."

:Do you love me too? Chandler whispered.''

I sighed. " I loved you for who you used to be Chandler. My fun, vibrant energetic uncle who I spent many fun times with in the apartments above Central Perks. Highlights for me were the Thanksgiving Day Football Game, seeing Kathy's play and Uncle Ross dressing up as the Holiday Armadillo."

"Those were definitely good times." Uncle Chandler squeezed my hand gently.

I exhaled again. "I do not love the person you became at all. You are not the same Uncle Chandler that I knew growing up. Your alcoholism and drug addiction has absolutely fucking destroyed you and your relationships with your entire family. You just admitted to me that you have been using me for sex for our entire relationship. I lost respect for you when you sucked my breast on our honeymoon. Our "marriage" was not even a reality it was as Auntie Monica called it "Your sick and twisted sexual fantasy" Richard told me I was your sex slave for those two nights and I could not agree with him more. The love went out of our relationship when you told me that you stole money from me on our honeymoon. Go fuck yourself Chandler and I hope you rot in hell."

Chandler's hand fell to his side and he took his final breath. He passed away at 7:15pm on May 23rd 2023.

Auntie Monica met me in the lobby. "How was your time?:

"He's dead Auntie Monica. He passed away a few minutes ago.. I got to say my final goodbyes."

Auntie Monica squeezed my shoulder. "I'm sorry honey. How are you doing?"

I kissed her cheek gently. "Relieved."

Auntie Monica exhaled. "Did you tell him how you felt about your "wedding night"?"

I nodded. "Yes. I did. I told him I loved the person he used to be when we all in Manhattan and not what his alcoholism turned him into."

"I'm proud of you baby girl. Are you going to miss him?"

My eyes met hers and I exhaled. "No, not at all. He was such a bastard for how he has been using me for sex."

"Honey, you have really been one of the strongest people I've ever met through this situation with Chandler. I really admire you for that."

I smiled. "Thank you Auntie Monica. Oh wait I should let the nurses know that Chandler passed away. I'll be right back."

"Mommy and Daddy were sad ?" Joey's eyes looked up at Auntie Monica in confusion.

Auntie Monica kissed my son's head. "Mommy and Daddy have had a strained relationship my precious boy. You were the bright star in all their difficult days."

"I love you Monica."

" I love you too honey."

I returned to her five minutes later.

"Should we go home and put the baby to bed?" Auntie Monica asked,

"Yes , definitely."

Auntie Monica's hand rubbed my back gently.. "Love you to pieces my beautiful baby girl." she whispered.

My lips kissed her cheek gently. "You and Rachel will always be two of my best friends Auntie Monica. I love the two of you very much"

The next morning Joey bounced on my bed at 8:45

"Get up Mama! There is a party and presents downstairs Come on let's go!

Richard scooped my son into his arms. "Give your mother room to breathe Joseph Chandler."

I looked at Richard in confusion. "What's going on Richard? It's not my birthday. It's only May 24th."

Richard kissed my head. "Call it a rebirth of sorts because you are out of Chandler's controlling grasp. Get dressed sweetheart. Your grandparents are downstairs and breakfast is just about ready."

I smiled. "I'll be right down!"

When I entered the living room Grandma Nora stood up.

"My darling, what a beautiful young woman you've become."

I fell into her embrace. "I have missed you and Grandpa so much Grandma."

Grandma Nora motioned to Grandpa Charles and he joined our embrace. "We missed you too sweetheart and we're so happy we can finally be a a family again." Grandpa whisperd.

Once we sat down to breakfast Grandma Nora looked at me.

"We wanted to talk to you about the will sweetheart. Chandler left you quite a lot of money in the will. We were wondering what you wanted to do with it."

I swallowed a bite of my chocolate chip pancake,. "Childcare and education for Joey should be top priority."

Grandpa Charles cleared his throat. "He left you his house as well and we wanted to take you shopping for furnishings."

My jaw dropped. "Wow, that's great."

After breakfast I sat down on the couch in front of a stack of presents.

First was a card from Richard. I opened it and saw a gift card to Barnes and Nobles.

"Pick out whatever book you want or even a note book to write some poetry in."

"Thank you Richard."

Next I picked up a small box. "Who is this from?"

"It's from me and Rachel honey." We had it made special for you at the jewelry store." Auntie Monica whispered.

I gingerly removed a necklace from the box. "It's so pretty." I whispered.

The necklace had our three birthstones surrounded by a golden heart with our initials in the center.

"Mama and Rachel love you so much baby. This necklace signifies how tight our bond will always be. We will always be here for you."

"You two will always be my best friends Auntie Monica." I whispered.

"I love you my angel." Auntie Monica kissed my forehead.

"I love you too Mama."

"Mommy, Open my gift next! Joey was bouncing up and down excitedly.

I picked up the present. Inside was a painting.

"See Mommy, that's our family. There's you and me, Monica, Richard, Auntie Erica and Uncle Jack."

I kissed his head gently. "It's beautiful. Who's under the ground surrounded by fire?" I pointed.

"That's Daddy Mommy because he was mean to you and he's in the bad place."

I squeezed his hand gently. "Daddy loved you so much honey despite the fact the two of us had trouble getting along. Please never forget that okay?"

"Okay Mommy."

Next was an envelope of gift cards from Jack and Erica. I held up a Victoria's Secret Gift Card so Erica could see."

She grinned, "Please replace that slutty sleep top from Chandler with something you will actually wear. Emma and I chipped in for that one. There is $50.00 on it."

I smiled back at her. "I definitely will. Thank you sweetheart."

The next gift was from Grandma Nora. In it was what looked like a book that I had not seen at Barnes and Nobles.

Grandma smiled at me. "My editor just sent me the advance copy of my new book. I was wondering if you'd review it."

I hugged her tightly. "Of course I will Grandma. Where do I send the review to?"

"My publisher's email is on the slip of paper in the book."

"When do you want to go shopping for the furnishings for your new house?" Grandpa Charles asked.

"Thursday at noon."

"Sounds good sweetheart. Love you.

I kissed his cheek, "I love you and Grandma Nora so much Grandpa Charles."

At that time I could not be grateful for my family.

To my dismay twelve years later my son would follow in his father's footsteps. Starting in the eighth grade he got mixed in with a rough crowd of kids and started drinking and doing drugs. He was in and out of jail, juvenile detention and the sober living house. Despite of all this he still managed to get his GED. He did not go to college or could not hold down a job because of his addictions. There were times when he was doing really well and then he'd relapse.

The last conversation we had after his most recent relapse went like this

"Are you doing drugs again Joey?"

He looked away.

"Well?"

"Yeah Mom, so what?"

What do you mean so what? You know what my house rules are Joseph Chandler!"

"They don't make a difference to me!"

My eyes filed with fiery rage. "OH REALLY? Did you know that drugs and alcohol was what fucking killed your father Joey?"

"Yeah, trust me you and Monica have tried to drill that into my head since I was fifteen."

"Why aren't you listening to us Joey?

Joey's face got so close to mine that I could smell the alcohol and cigarettes on his breath.. "BECAUSE I DON:T FUCKING WANT TO MOM! I AM SICK OF YOUR RULES! THEY IMPACT ME FROM LIVING MY LIFE THE WAY THAT I WANT TO!"

I pushed him away and then he lunged at me and started slapping me.

Auntie Monica and Jack entered the room "Hey Joey, get away from her! What the fuck are you doing?" Jack asked and he pulled his nephew off of me.

Auntie Monica put her arm around me gently. "Are you okay honey?"

I shook my head and buried my face into her shoulder.

Auntie Monica glared at my son angrily. "Joseph Chandler Bing, what the hell is wrong with you?"

"I told Mom I didn't want to follow your rules anymore Monica. She's being a bitch."

Rage filled Auntie Monica's eyes. "I'm sorry sweetheart but I am totally on your mother's side. Your behavior lately has been abhorrent. I have been in touch with the sober living house and they have an apartment ready for you to move in to. Your parole officer will be here in about half hour to pick you up. Pack your bags!"

This happened shortly after Joey's twenty first birthday. Five years later at 1:15pm on January 15th 2048 my son Joseph Chandler Bing died alone in his apartment at the sober living apartment house. I hope he is happier now throwing around the football in heaven with his father Chandler.