A/N: I know it's been a long while since I wrote another blooper reel. I initially stopped because I thought it was starting to get too repetitive and predictable, but now, after rewatching the film recently, I was like what the heck, I'll finish some more. Just be aware that this part is more or less some leftover ideas. Whether there will be another part or not is still to be determined.
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"I knew she'd flake," Tyler crossed his arms with frustration.
Then, the doorbell rang. Everyone's spirits were lifted when they saw a large shadow at the front door, and they all rushed to the entrance, chattering amongst themselves, as they excitedly anticipated the panda girl's entrance.
"Ugh. About time," Tyler opened the door in relief.
It turned out that Mei was present as her giant panda form instead of her expected cardboard costume, complete with a tiny party hat on her massive head.
"Who's ready to partaaaayyy?!" she whooped, pumping her fists.
The horde of students, flabbergasted that Mei became the red panda so soon, became ecstatic, jumping and raising their arms while Tyler gave Mei a big bear hug.
"Whoooooo!" the students cheered.
"Cut!" the director shouted.
"Awwwwww!" the crowd moped and argued from the abrupt buzzkill.
"You can all have your fun when we get to filming the party scenes," she spoke over a megaphone.
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Grandma Wu inhaled deeply as she prayed to herself, "Sun Yee, give me strength."
Without notice, she whipped out her jade bracelet in the air and threw it on the ground, shattering it into many pieces. Giant pink clouds of smoke emitted from her spot and blew through the rest of the family. When the pink mist finally cleared away, the camera panned from the top of her red, scarred head, until it zoomed out revealing her panda form wearing an oversized Sailor Moon outfit. She opened her eyes and looked down, gasping in shock from the sudden wardrobe change.
"Huh? What the…" Panda Wu's eyes widened.
The cast and crew all erupted with uproarious laughter.
"Ahh!" the director couldn't hold in her fangirling. "That's my favorite anime!"
Panda Wu clenched her fists and growled, storming off the set. "I don't get paid enough for this. So humiliating."
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A close-up interior shot of Panda Mei's big mouth could be seen as she chomped on a piece of a birthday cake. When the camera cut to the slices of cake with Tyler's face plastered on it, she used the claws on her fingers as little skewers. She poked five slices of cake and shoved them all into her wide mouth before pulling out her fingers and chewing them with her cheeks full.
"Cut! Stop being so greedy!" the director attempted to contain her laughter. "You're eating all of our supply!
"I know, but it tastes so good, mmm!" Panda Mei muffled with her mouth full as she poked more cube-shaped slices of cake with her other paw. "Which bakery did you get these from?"
The director then advised her, "At least save some for your other friends."
"Yeah, Mei!" Abby sassed loudly.
"Fine," Panda Mei laid down in defeat as the catering crew laid out another partly-eaten cake for the next take.
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"And sorry I'll never be like you!" Panda Mei shouted at the top of her lungs.
She anticipated her target as she prepared to headbutt her giant panda mom directly in the face. As Panda Ming reached to grab her, her velocity sped up even more. Unfortunately for her, she aimed a little too high and flew right over her large tuft of hair. Panda Ming grunted in confusion and turned around as Panda Mei continued screaming and eventually landed head-first into one of the trash cans on the metal bleachers.
One of the cameramen, who happened to be near Mei's trajectory, ran over to the crash site. What was pictured on the tape showed a faint pink cloud of dust escaping from the flipped over trash can, which was luckily empty. The bin shifted a little until Mei, who reverted back to human, tossed it out, feeling exhilarated, with crooked glasses on her face.
"That was fun. Let's…do that again," Mei mumbled, a little woozy.
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In the astral realm, Mei looked around the stalks of bamboo as she tried to locate her redhead mom. Then, she heard some distant crying and went to check it out. Mei noticed that there was a sobbing girl with red hair sitting there and ran to take a closer look.
"Mom? Are you okay? We have to…" Mei tried to comfort her.
The unidentified female then turned her head, who turned out to be Miriam wearing a red wig. Mei, taken aback, loudly shrieked and fell back, landing on her haunches.
The crew in the background chuckled as Miriam removed her wig and revealed her auburn hair. "Got you!"
Mei playfully chuckled along with them, albeit still a little spooked.
"Alright, let's do it for real this time," the director commanded.
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"I guess you could call me…" Mei narrated in the band room.
"A very enterprising," Mei's teacher took another sip from his mug, "mildly annoying young lady."
"A major weirdo," the Goth Girl with the purple-dyed hair spoke.
"An overachieving dork-narc," Tyler finished the description.
Right when he tossed the basketball for the hoop, Mei jumped in front of him, and it hit her directly on the face.
"Oof!" Mei landed on her side on the hard, concrete courtyard.
The camera panned down to the ground as Mei still struggled to finish her line while pinching her red, swelling nose. "I accept…and embrace….all labels. Nailed it!"
"Someone get first-aid please," a crew member called in the background.
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"Crap! You guys better go," Mei shoved all her friends toward the window of her bedroom.
"But…" Miriam interjected.
"No "buts," Mir," Mei responded as the girls climbed out her window. "My mom already doesn't like you."
"Wait, she doesn't?" Miriam quickly said in disbelief.
Not even a second later, Mei closed the window shut, and Abby let out a high-pitched squeal as her fingers got caught on the windowsill. The crew rushed in to help, and the camera then faced the director who gritted her teeth and waved her flat hand across her neck, signaling to cut the tape.
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"And $200? For what?" Ming brushed off Mei's frustration. "Who do they think they are?"
She then began improvising various Canadian singers. "Shania Twain?"
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"Bryan Adams?"
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"Michael Bublé?"
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"Alanis Morissette?"
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"Celine Dion?"
The director did a slow clap after she finished that take. "Okay, I think we finally got it. That flowed quite nicely."
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During the suspenseful scene at the dining table, Jin brought over a cardboard box and placed it in front of Mei. Both her parents flinched and kept their distance as Mei slowly grabbed the cardboard box before finally opening it up, revealing cute, fluffy little kittens. Just the sheer sight of them made her immediately poof into a red panda, and the wooden chair cracked under her weight.
"Oops! Sorry," Mei apologized
"Cut! It's okay, Mei," the director sighed. "We'll just try it again, one more time."
Panda Mei's eyes gleamed with delight as she cuddled the little kitties under her fluffy arms.
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Mei repeated the kitten scene with another take, but this time she managed to resist just a little farther into the kitten test scene.
"So cute!" she squeezed her skirt tightly as the kittens began climbing up her arms and face.
This time, she still couldn't withstand the temptation and poofed once again, destroying—yet again—another chair.
The director exhaled a deep sigh as she rubbed her temple. "Cut, let's do it…again."
Panda Mei forced out an apologetic grin, chuckling awkwardly.
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After doing the same scene again over and over, it seemed that Mei would finally manage to get the scene done successfully. With the kittens crawling on her shoulders, she barely finished saying her final line, "Must resis…"
Without even noticing, she let down her guard and poofed again. Yet another poor chair was broken once again.
"This is the fifteenth take. I cannot believe this." the director's broke down. "I need a break."
Panda Mei stroked their fur as the director walked off the set, and the camera panned to the corner of the room, revealing a large pile of broken and cracked chairs. One of the dangling legs snapped off from the top of the pile and bounced down to the ground.
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Mei's aunties and grandma sat around a table as they ate bamboo leaves and stalks for lunch in their red panda forms, right outside the SkyDome.
"Gotta keep the panda from getting hungry, amirite?" Panda Lily commented.
Everyone else ignored her question as they kept munching on their panda meal.
"I gotta say, it's too bad Ming's panda couldn't come join us. She could easily destroy this feast with one stomp of her feet! " Panda Ping added.
"Ugh! It's absolutely ridiculous what my agent is offering for my panda," Panda Wu scowled.
"What is it?" the other aunties asked.
"They want me to become therapy panda, haiya," she scoffed. "Don't they see? I'm too old to be helping other people's problems. I've lived my life already. So stupid."
"Maybe Mei-Mei could become one," Panda Lily spoke up again. "She has good control over her…"
"Quiet, Lily!" Panda Wu demanded. "Her family is the one who needs therapy."
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"Hey, Panda Girl," Tyler called to Panda Mei on his roof.
She turned around with a deadly glare and bright, piercing eyes.
"What are you doing? We want more rides," he gestured to the impatient crowd.
"Buzz off, [BLEEP] face. I'm busy!" she vented her frustration a little too well.
"Oh, snap," the crowd gasped and oohed at her profanity-laced insult.
Her red fur settled back to normal as she covered her mouth from red-flamin' embarrassment.
"Alright, alright," the director settled down the crowd of rowdy students. "Let's remember to keep it PG."
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As Panda Mei made her final leap and flew right above her old, shocked shaman in slow motion, she gasped with excitement as she reached closer to entering her home. When she got close to the temple walls, she barely reached high enough to stick the landing and got hit right down below her belly at the clay roof tiles. Her eyes bulged out, and she bit her lip hard as she leaned forward and slid down into the temple. She then held her legs tight with both paws.
"Could I get an ice pack, please?" Panda Mei wheezed, tearing up a bit. "Ah, my ovaries!"
"Cut! the director slammed down her megaphone. "I swear, the next take will be the final one. At this rate, she's close to knocking down these walls."
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A gust of wind blowing green leaves served as a guide for Mei, wearing a red robe, who was escorted along the path until she saw an open field once she brushed herself through the bamboo forest. The guide turned out to be her ancestor, Sun Yee, who waved her hands with a red ribbon, forming a portal, which sank down to Mei's level. The thing is, she didn't see her former self with black hair.
"Huh?" Mei tilted her head. "Where's my reflection?"
Suddenly, another figure popped out of the dark void from the other side. Once again, it was Miriam who jumpscared her. "Boo!"
"Aah!" she exclaimed.
The crew all cackled with laughter, but Mei wasn't laughing along with them.
"Darn it, Mir! I've had it with you guys!" Mei angrily dusted off her robe, walking away from the cameras. "I'll be in my trailer."
"Woah, this is so cool!" Miriam tapped on the portal with the palm of her hands. "Now, how do I get out?"
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Panda Mei raced through the doors as she gave Tyler a piggyback ride out in the backyard.
"Faster! Faster!" Tyler whooped, thrilled by the fast-paced ride.
She leaped over the strand of light bulbs repeatedly as more and more riders floated midair from her continuous jumps, with Abby even grabbing her tail at one point. Eventually, the camera displayed all her friends, including Mei, floating in the air with their hands up. But there was something the camera didn't capture after that freeze frame. Their smiles turned upside down as they all fell towards the grass, with many of them bouncing off Mei's back, knocking the wind out of her.
They all groaned and moaned as the director turned to the crew and commented, "I think we could salvage something out of that footage, right?"
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Mei fast-walked into her room carrying all of the gifts she received from her aunties. Then, she rushed to shove them all in her drawer and started mashing all her stuffed animals into a pile and covering it with her blanket.
"Mei-Mei, can I have a word with you?" Grandma Wu barged into her room unexpectedly.
"Cut! You came in too early!" the director exclaimed,
"Oh, did I? My apologies," she bowed to her quickly, shutting the door.
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Mei tossed out her shoes and stuck one foot out her window. Suddenly, her pupils shrank as multiple knocks could be heard at her door. She spinned into a quick somersault, but lost her footing and slipped on the floor.
"Mei-Mei, can I have a word…" she opened the door but saw her legs and arms sprawled out on the floor. "What the…"
The crew laughed at her little pratfall as Mei got up to her feet and dusted off herself.
"Cut! Let's have a go at another take."
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Mei tried her wavy little somersault again, but this she banged her foot on her desk, stubbing her toe.
She held her swollen toe tight and winced, inhaling sharply through her teeth and whined, "Aaaah."
She did the same steps again and whined again, "Aaaaaah."
"Ugh, this again?" Grandma Wu sighed behind the closed door.
Mei kept repeating this routine as the crew looked at each other nervously. "How long is she going to keep this up for?"
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"I'm not going to regret this, am I?" Mei nervously asked Sun Yee.
The ancestor gave a grateful smile and floated towards her, poofing them both into red pandas. She held Panda Mei tight as they both flew up through the tall bamboo. Her mouth gaped wide open with glee, looking down at their height. When they finally cleared through the bamboo, Panda Mei pursed her lips and kept snickering, noticing a green goatee on her face, formed from the pieces of bamboo they just crashed through.
"Cut!"
The red panda ancestor giggled a little and scrubbed the bamboo off her face, which then flew and got stuck onto Mei's furry tummy. "Hey!"
"Aw, man, we were about to get to the best part," the director whined, deadpan.
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"I can't believe this," the director communicated with Panda Mei, "You were willing to run into oncoming traffic and double jump onto high buildings, but you can't hop into a concert?"
"Augh, I know, but it just looks so high from up here," she peered over from the roof of the stadium, her heart racing from the height. "It's just a lot harder than it seems."
"Well, the falling part is how you'll enter the concert. What other option would there be? Sneaking in the back?"
"No?"
"Exactly! So, we gotta try to figure out a solution. Try to think of a calming technique that'll help you overcome your fear of heights.
"Alright, I'll try my best."
The director then clapped her hands. "Let's take five, everyone. Try to think it over, panda girl. I'm counting on you!"
A bell rang in the back as everyone set down their equipment. She gave Panda Mei a quick wink after standing up from the director's chair and started chatting with the producers. Mei poofed back to human and placed her closed fist on her chin, seeking out any ideas that could help her overcome this challenging scene, despite the intended use of many safety harnesses.
Then, it suddenly clicked! She thought back of a conversation she had with another friend. It had something to do with someone named Bruno? Anyway, she put the pieces together and finally figured out the key to fixing her restraint of her scene. The five minutes turned out to have flown fast, since the director already approached Mei pretty quickly.
"Did you figure it out?" she asked.
Mei's grin widened and nodded slowly. "Yup, all I need to say is 'Silenzio, Bruno!'"
The director raised an eyebrow and tilted her head with confusion. "Who's Bruno?"
"It's a long story," Mei brushed her shoulder. "This technique will work, trust me."
"Okay, whatever you say," the director shrugged it off. "Alright, let's take it from the top! Places, everyone!"
Before Mei went back to climb down the roof, the director tapped her shoulder. "Before you go, I wanna show you something"
She guided a nervous Mei close to the ledge and then handed her a pair of binoculars. She pointed down to the crowd, and she peered through the lens after removing her glasses. During a close-up look, she saw that all her friends were holding together a large red sign that read, "YOU CAN DO IT MEI!"
"Aww," Mei became wowed from their nice gesture.
Then, the director whispered something into a walkie-talkie and commenced something that would help keep her spirits up.
The large crowd started chanting, "Let's go, Meilin! Let's go!" clap-clap-clap.
"Let's go, Meilin! Let's go!" clap-clap-clap.
"Let's go, Meilin! Let's go!" clap-clap-clap.
As the audience kept chanting on, she wiped tears of joy from the emotional support and ran to give the director a big *POOF* panda hug. "Thanks a lot, Domee."
"You're welcome," she patted her on the back, or as high as she could on an 8-foot animal. She gave a peace sign and shouted, "You the real R.P.G!" (Red Panda Girl)
"Oh, stop it," Panda Mei blushed with her rosy cheeks. "No one calls me by that name."
"Okay, then, let's get this scene over with."
Panda Mei nodded and ran back to her starting point which would be right below the roof. Right before the cameras started rolling, she took one last deep breath and looked up with a determined face, repeating to herself, "Silenzio, Bruno."
"And…action!"
Panda Mei popped onto the roof with a fast twirl and poofed up in the air, spreading her arms and legs out as the 4*Town spotlight shone behind her. With one last cry of joy, she began making her descent with her free fall while the crowd was cheering down at the 4*Town concert. Or were they cheering for her?