LPOV

The drive home was a sobering experience for me to say the least. I had just blown this whole thing WAY out of proportion for absolutely no reason.

It was just difficult for me to watch Edward wrapped up with another whore. It made my blood boil.

I had very little control over myself.

It wasn't me who did that.

Technically...

But it was me. And I felt terrible.

What was I to do? Apologize to him or that slut for what I did.

No, fucking, way.

I wasn't really looking for a fight, I guess, I was just trying to embarrass him. All I could think about was how jealous I was.

Although, Edward and I are no longer an item, i can't typically help that my libido is crying out for the guy. It was just too much for me to see.

But I most definitely summed up enough courage thanks to the booze supplied to me before hand.

Jessica was silent on the way home, probably because she was sparring me a lecture since I was still a little drunk.

I kept my head against the cool window as I allowed the refreshing breeze from the air conditioner to blow lightly against my face.

The rest was a blur, i remember Jess chatting away at some point about how she didn't remember the last time I had gotten this drunk, blah, blah, bleh..

I could hardly retain any detail of the one sided conversation. So for some reason I curled into a fetal position and passed out.

Before I knew it, we were pulling up into my driveway.

Some drool was smudged up against the window where my face just was. I tried to clean it but my depth perception was seemingly failing me. I felt a lot better now that the car had stopped moving, I couldn't wait to get into bed.

My head was already full of a bunch of debilitating thoughts of how I didn't measure up to that bitch that Edward was with.

"Alright, girlie, we'll talk tomorrow. Just know, it's all gonna be alright. And you are bat shit crazy," Jessica said humorously, snapping me from my inebriated thoughts.

I gave her a reassuring smile. At least I think I have her smile. I couldn't really tell.

"You gonna be able to make it inside?" She asked looking worried as she watched my hand fumbling with the door handle.

I shrugged her question off "got it bitch!" and finally got the door open after much effort.

She shook her head realizing probably that if she let me continue to try and get out of the car the way I was, she'd be out here for hours with me. "Fuck it," she laughed and opened her driver door.

It was like magic, I shut my eyes for like two seconds and once I opened them I was on the bed inside my bedroom with a stinging migraine.

Apparently Jess got me out of my black dress and into a big grey shirt and nothing else. I seriously needed to get the woman a gift basket with tons of chocolates and perfumes for dealing with me. I felt like such a shit bag friend.

It was about three o' clock in the morning when I heard a car pull up to the house through the open window.

Odd, Sam shouldn't be back for a few more days.

Did I perhaps oversleep?

I swear I gotta quit smoking weed.

Before I could finish my thought, I looked out the window and was surprised to see Edward's truck parked in front of my driveway.

"Oh no," I whispered.

If I was being timed I would've broken a world record. It took me seconds to run from the bedroom, down the stairs, and dash to the front door.

I reached for the lock but immediately pulled back as if the metal burned me.

"Ah shit!" I began pacing back and forth in front of the door. I clasped my hands together tightly.

What the fuck am I supposed to say? I didn't think he'd actually try to confront me.

I should've known, but then again, I've been incapacitated for the past few hours so...not much can be said.

Toughen up, Leah.

A lot easier said than done.

Gotta somehow shrug off this awful headache and hangover and try to muster up enough strength to talk to this fuckhead about whatever is bothering him.

I took a deep breath and unlocked the door. With a whoosh I opened that door and waited for him to come up the steps into the front porch.

My arms instinctively wrapped around my stomach. I was so nervous I could vomit.

He stomped through.

The look on his face, the clench in his jaw, the narrowing in his eyes. It was a look that i didn't realized I'd missed till now. His arms cross as he takes one step closer to me. "Why are you doing this to me?"

I trembled slightly at the cool breeze entering the house through the open doorway. "What are you talking about?"

"You can't stand to see me happy with someone else?"

Fuck.

"You're happy, but what? You don't think I deserve someone?" His arms uncross, rough hands cupping my face. I couldn't help but let a small short yelp pass my lips as he pushes me against the door. His face gets closer to mine. "Don't fuck with me, Leah."

"Wha-what? What, Edward?!" I was feeling absolutely flabbergasted and arroused as we both shouted at each other. I could feel the heat coming off his body, meanwhile, a pool is forming in my underwear and I'm automatically taken back by guilt. I shouldn't feel this way.

But he's just so close now.

I could smell his aftershave, woodsy and so fucking sexy. I was inches away from his beautiful face, so close to those tantalizing lips..

I finally realize Edward is waiting patiently for me to say something. His eyes desperate.

"What are you talking about?" I asked.

"You know exactly what I am talking about, don't play dumb now baby girl."

Oh, I loved the way that sounded.

I, in fact, do know what he's going on about of course. I knew this was about me shouting out in a public bar that Edward gave me an STD, which was a really bad lie that my drunk mind came up with as I stomped towards the beautiful couple. Again, I am extremely impulsive. This confrontation was explaining to me why this guy showed up at MY frontstep, asking me a bunch of reckless questions. Raising his voice to me, in MY house. I didn't care if I ruined his big night with that bimbo. I was looking to fight him about this, but inside I knew this is what I wanted instead. I wanted him to ravage me, completely and utterly violate me in every sense of the word. I felt as if I was close to getting what I wanted in the first place, all I had to do was poke the bear a teeny bit more.

"Oh, please, as if you gave a shit about her anyways!"

"You clearly wanted to make sure it would end before I even got a chance to give a shit, Leah!"

"Whatever." I know I sounded extremely childish, but I really did not give a shit.

"Oh, whatever," he spat back mockingly. "You can't just go around doing whatever you want."

I raised my brows. "Wanna bet?" I was challenging him. And I saw a little glimmer in his eyes.

Before i could think twice about the way he looked at me, he pulled away grasping at his hair and groaning. "I have just as much pull in this town as you do."

His hands fell back above my shoulders against the door, causing me to jump unexpectedly. "What do you want from me?" He asked. "You're giving me some fucked up mixed signals." He leaned down towards me until our foreheads were touching, "you're getting married," he whispered.

I couldn't even respond, my throat was so dry. My body almost seemed to be on auto pilot as I glanced down with the intention of staring at my feet, but instead noticing the very visible buldge in his jeans and stared back up into his eyes.

Now I had absolutely no idea what to do! His desire for me is blatantly put on display. Just for me. And I'd love to do nothing more than to take him all right there in my mouth, on the front porch, absolutely no fucks given.

I let out a gutteral noise that could only be explained as a moan and bit my lip to fight back anymore nonsense that I could just blurt out. Even though I chose not to say a damn thing. He knew. Edward knew how desperate I was feeling, because he felt the same way. He's just now coming to grips with it. He was just now letting his desire for me show. His hand slides down and around my face until he was gripping my jaw, his other hand sliding up until his fingers push through my hair holding me back against the door.

I had to get a hold of myself, "w-we can't!" I spurted out.

I saw the flicker of pain in his eyes immediately flash into something more resentful. "Then," he paused, moving his hands away from my face and hair. Losing all his warmth I feel a cold shiver creep back up my bare legs. I cross my arms and can't help but hate myself for letting that opportunity slide.

"Don't fuck with me like that," he rasped. His voice sending more chills down my spine. "I want to say so much, but I can't, cause it doesn't matter anymore."

Ouch.

"So you won't say anything at all then?" I questioned.

He rolled his eyes. "It's like a conundrum, I don't know what you want me to say."

Truth was, I wasn't so sure what I wanted him to say either. Then it just came out before I even had time to think about it, "just stay."

The whole porch was still. With it being so early in the morning all I could hear in the distance were the birds chirping.

Edward's brow raised slightly, and he looked as though he was suspicious of my words and the meaning in them. "What?" He probably thought I was crazy.

I just couldn't help myself anymore. I was tired of feeling empty. I just needed him here. And I knew he couldn't resist if I put the pressure on him. I stepped forward, reaching out and placing my palm gently against his chest. His heart was beating so fast. "Stay here tonight," I repeated louder.

He became quiet again. "You're with Sam."

I wanted to cry, because it already felt like he was rejecting me. "It's okay if you don't want to."

As I began pulling away he grabbed me suddenly by my arm. "I will fuck the life out of you if I stay," his words made my breath hitch. "I promise you that, Leah."