When I woke up in the morning, I came around only to find myself alone. The quarters were empty from what my wings were telling me. Rolling over and sitting up I slowly swung my legs over the side of the bed.
With my wings twitching again, I suddenly picked up on the reverberations of the main door sliding open. I stood up slowly and walked to my doorway; peeking around the corner I saw the familiar black-and-white armor.
I quietly watched Prowl as he walked into the 'kitchen'. I heard him mess with something for a few moments. A gushing noise was heard, but that's not what got my attention, it was the warm scent of something spicy yet sweet.
The energon always held a tint of sweetness like blueberries or strawberries, maybe ripe grapes? The spicy scent however, I had no idea what that was. It was definitely alluring. I could feel my tanks clench and gurgle.
Ever since I had moved in with Prowl, I hadn't been taking in very much energon; but now I was paying the price. Prowl suddenly walked past the doorway calmly, heading into the 'living' room. He held two large cubes of energon in his servos, and there was another gurgle from my tanks and I was tempted to come out.
"I know you're online, so why don't you come get some energon?" He said calmly.
I jumped and ducked my helm. Frag... is he psychic? I could feel my spark thumping harshly and the feeling of two presences entered my mind.
One was questioning and the other worried. Tentatively I sent feelings of ease through the links and within moments both receded into a dull humming. I wasn't really sure what I should do. I knew I needed the energon, and what he had smelled wonderful, but this was Prowl! He was… always so cold, like he was heartless or something.
I'm not sure what it is about him, but it scared me. It almost made me wish to be back with my father… almost! The thing is, Prowl had never hit me, at least as far as I can remember, but lately my memories haven't been all there somehow. It's weird, and really scary, because I know that I've met some of the mechs I've seen, but I can't remember them… I can't even remember their names.
When my tanks clenched again, it was with a rumble this time… one that actually hurt. Like it or not, I needed that energon. Shivering, I slowly stepped from my doorway and inched out to the small hall to the rooms adjacent from it. The door was a straight shot, energon area to the left and the sitting area to the right.
Looking over to the black-and-white tactician I stood still watching, observing, him. His armor, as always, was pristine. Not in a vain way, but in a formal 'I have to look decent for work' type look. His wings were raised high up, framing his helm tensely.
I glanced at the energon on the small table, a cube sat in front of the mech as he scrolled through a data-pad. The other sat beside him facing the other side of the 'couch'. I trembled and slowly walked over to sit timidly beside him. Reaching out to the cube, I kept glancing at him warily. I couldn't help it, old habits die hard.
"As much as some of the mechs might state otherwise, I do not bite. There is no need for you to be so cautious… or afraid of me."
I flinched. Am I that noticeable? I held the cube to my chassis as if afraid he might take it. Which in a way I was, my father had been like that. Why wouldn't Prowl? I sipped on the liquid and jolted. It was spicy, very spicy. Not in a way that made your mouth taste bitter and feel numb, it was a pleasant spicy like cinnamon or something.
"Oh..." I stared at the cube in surprise, and with one servo I pressed my slender digits to my lip-plates. I picked up on a faintly amused noise. Looking up at the large mech I found his suddenly gentle optics locked on my own. What...? I've seen that look before... the gentleness... A flash of blond hair, a woman who held me close. A woman who took the brutal treatment to spare me. The look of a loving parent. I quickly glanced down, staring at the cube.
"It's only Zinc, so there is nothing for you to be concerned about." I frowned and tilted my helm, curiosity slowly easing some of my fears away. Not all, but some.
"Why?" I saw the way his lip-plates twitched in a faint smile as he took a sip of his own energon.
"Zinc is good for younglings and sparklings. The mineral helps their systems replenish faster." A frown pulled at my lip-plates, more of the fear slipping away. It was like he was somehow washing away some of my terror, I wasn't sure how though.
"I'm not a sparkling... nor am I a youngling..." The words were mumbled so as he wouldn't hear them, but apparently he still did.
"Yes you are. Mentally and emotionally you are still somewhat unstable because your programming hasn't fully adjusted yet, and physically, you are still growing." His voice was smooth, calm, and unemotional. I pulled in on myself again, fear etching back in my spark. I hated seeing him emotionless, it brought back memories I didn't want… memories I couldn't stand.
I focused my attention on my energon, taking a sip of it and swishing it around my glossa. It sent powerful zips of energy through my mouth, tingly and refreshing. After swallowing, I looked back at Prowl and decided to divulge my immature side, even though logically I knew it'd only give him more ammo to use later.
"Nu-uh." He blinked and looked up at me, raising an optic ridge. His optics shifted away from me and back onto the data-pad he had been working on.
"You are still a minority." I frowned and huffed. Why won't he play along? Suddenly I winced internally and wanted to face palm. I sounded just like a kid wondering why their parent-creator- wouldn't come play with them.
"Nu-uh..." I mumbled again, testing the waters per say. After a moment of silence and him focused entirely back on his data-pad, I picked up my cube and slunk back to my room. Sipping at my cube I sat down on my berth, wings flexing and shifting.
How come I couldn't get a guardian like Jazz or Hound... Instead I was stuck with the emotionless prick. I huffed a sigh and stared down at the pink liquid, gently I swirled it around in the clear container. I found myself growing bored of that however, and began to wonder what I could do around here that wouldn't get me in trouble.
Tentatively I picked at the bonds in my chassis, curious as to the stronger of the two. I remember kind optics, love. A lot of talking from the mech, wings like mine only bigger. I remembered... I flushed remembering the first interface and bonding session.
Jolting from my thoughts I felt a gentle prodding of minute curiosity, the link led back to the room that I had just come from. I grimaced at his version of curiosity. Has anyone ever told him that he looms like a vulture waiting to pick the smallest detail from your body?
Seriously, that was what his small ebb of curiosity felt like. Like he was looming and waiting, going to nab me for the simplest thing. I shivered and curled further into my berth, hiding into the corner of the wall that it rested up against.
I chugged down the rest of the energon resulting in a burning sensation in my tanks. However, I couldn't really care less at the moment… for I had picked up voices. When did he come in?
I recognized the voice from somewhere, I just couldn't remember where. I was sure that if I saw him then maybe it would trigger some memory, whether for good or bad I had to know. After a moment I heard Prowl answer something back in a snippy tone, I couldn't really make it out though.
Biting my bottom lip I quietly stepped off the berth and slid into the hall. Shifting into a crouch I balanced myself precariously and set the digits of my right servo to act as my equilibrium check. Curling the digits of my right servo around the wall I slowly peeked around the corner and froze.
"You are supposed to inform us when a new bot arrives! Why haven't you been at your office? Why have you been shirking off here with the newbie?!" It was the human mech… Galloway, that was his name. I quickly ducked my helm from view and focused on trying to get my vents under control.
He's just a human, he can't hurt you anymore! Not physically. Shut-up! He c-can't hurt me! I won't-You won't let him? Since when were you ever powerful enough to help yourself at the hand of a man, at the hands of authority? Oh right, never.
I could feel coolant welling up in my optics as I tried to focus on not letting my engine stutter and hiccup. It would surely give me away.
"I have not been to my office for multiple reasons Mr. Galloway. One of which is that the femme is not yet stable enough to be by herself. Secondly-"
"I don't give a rats flying ass! You are supposed to be in your office, not here babysitting! If a bot is that much of a problem, then get. Rid. Of. It." It had grown deathly silent. Not a single word uttered, not a breath taken.
"Are you suggesting that I abandon a mentally unstable femme while there are Decepticons out there?"
"Yes. We can not afford to have unnecessary burdens." Burden... that's all I am? Pain lashed through my spark, enveloping me.
"Perhaps I should speak with your supervisors in the human upper command. After all, we can not have a human who has an unbiased, and obviously prejudicial hatred and disrespect for aliens as our liaison… now can we?" There was a sputtering noise as the human seemed to flounder for words.
"Are you threatening me?" He finally managed to shriek. I winced and clapped my servos over my audio receptors. Peaking around the corner I froze seeing Prowl actually glaring at the human.
"No, Galloway, it is no threat. What I have stated is an incontroversial fact. Nothing more and nothing less. If you would be so kind as to remove yourself from the room until you are in a stable frame of mind, then we may discuss things." He said it all in a no nonsense tone.
The man sputtered and stalked from the room, the sliding door of the quarters opening and closing. Did Prowl just... protect me? But... he's got more important things to worry about... why would he try to save me when so many others did not?
I shivered and slowly backed away. walking to my berth I stretched out on my abdomen and shuttered my optics. Why would he do that? Authority figures never helped. Guardians, police, medics... they never helped. They just sent you back to where you came from so it could happen all over again. So why would he do that... why me?
I shuttered my optics and tried to focus on what was going on, but my processors didn't want to seem to work. They kept moving sluggishly and fading out of focus, until finally they forced my online protocols to shut down and activated my recharge ones. Perhaps it will all make sense later... after a nap of course...
Prowl's POV
I was working on the data-pad again when the femme finally got up and left. I glanced over and sure enough she took her cube. Good. She needs to refuel; I was beginning to think I would need to contact Ratchet.
Sighing, I looked over the statistics yet again and entered them into my battle computer. I was trying to calculate the statistics of yet another battle plan when I heard the knocking at the main doorway. I scowled and sent a mental code to the door, a moment later it slid open.
The human designated Galloway stormed in looking rather torqued. Of course he always looked like that so it was of no concern to me.
"Prowl! We have serious issues going on right now." I mentally sighed and pulled upon my long ago created patience. Primus knows I would need it.
"Of what consequence does 'serious issues' allow you to harass me in my quarters?" The human suddenly turned an odd shade of purple-red. Plum I believe it was called.
I momentarily contemplated putting Ratchet on stand by, but thought better of it. The human male came closer to where I sat; placing the data-pad on the small table I turned my attention to the smaller being. His vitals were going everywhere according to my wings, a suggestion of ire.
"You are supposed to inform us when a new bot arrives! Why haven't you been at your office? Why have you been shirking off here with the newbie?!" The man seemed to explode with anger; I was momentarily silent before narrowing my optics. I never 'shirked off' on my duties, it was my job to make sure the other mechs survived a battle. My occupation centered around that, energon stock, keeping every other bot in line and much, much more.
"I have not been to my office for multiple reasons Mr. Galloway. One of which is that the femme is not yet stable enough to be by herself. Secondly-" I spoke in my calmest voice; cool logic was obviously my only way of reasoning with his man. However, the mech cut me off much to my agitation.
"I don't give a rats flying ass! You are supposed to be in your office, not here babysitting! If a bot is that much of a problem, then get. Rid. Of. It." I was deathly silent after his outburst. On Cybertron, such words would have transmitted the man to public humiliation and punishment.
Our kind did not treat the young and femmes in such a way. They were fragile and needed protection, yet this human suggested I abandon the very life I was gifted with to protect? I tried to control the low rumbling growl that was building up in my chassis, optics flashing with anger.
This femme needs stability, someone who will not harm her. Whether it be insults or physical, yet this human suggests that I do the opposite of what she needs? Optics flashing even brighter I stood up to tower over the human. Suddenly the human male seemed slightly nervous at having a 20 ft tall sentient metal being towering over him.
"Are you suggesting that I abandon a mentally unstable femme while there are Decepticons out there?" My tense door wings quivered slightly with my barely controlled rage. Within moments my battle computer came online and began filtering through the emotion; taking it away before it could build and make me glitch.
"Yes. We can not afford to have unnecessary burdens." His next words sent an ebb of agony through my spark. I reeled internally trying to figure it out when my wings pinged. The femme was hiding, listening in on the conversation. I chose my next words carefully for her sake, and so that the human male would understand how serious I am.
"Perhaps I should speak with your supervisors in the human upper command. After all, we can not have a human who has an unbiased, and obviously prejudicial hatred and disrespect for aliens as our liaison… now can we?" The man seemed to grow pale, the purple pigmentation fading to stark white. He sputtered for a few moments rather unintelligent.
"Are you threatening me?" The human male managed to shriek out. I calmly stared down at him, cold logic running my circuits.
"No, Galloway, it is no threat. What I have stated is an incontroversial fact. Nothing more and nothing less. If you would be so kind as to remove yourself from the room until you are in a stable frame of mind, then we may discuss things."
The human male sputtered again, horror on his face. Then he turned and quickly walked from the room. I waited until the door had slid closed and I could no longer feel him before letting my wings relax slightly.
I glanced back into the hallway, the femmeling was no longer hidden in there. She must have retreated to her quarters. Sighing I walked down the hall and looked briefly, she was flexed out on her abdomen. Her helm buried in her arms, wings sagging in a depressed state even while she was in recharge. A pulse of worry shot through my spark, then my battle computer swept it away.
She is still scared of me... illogical...hmmm... I commenced to input other information I had been gaining subtly about her. I would figure out how to gain her trust, I was confident in that. Resting my hip plate on the back of the 'couch' I sipped on the rest of my energon.
I glanced down at the still awaiting data-pads. They could wait a little longer; I needed to find a scenario that would work.
Autumn POV
-tentacles trapping, stinging, lashing, connecting. Pain, fear...- I was twisting in my recharge with a soft mumbled keen.
-Suggestion: Submit. Statement: Mine.- I couldn't get out of the nightmare, it was there in my processors. I could feel my processors being ripped open violently; the presence was tearing into my mind. It was about as gentle as trying to hug a cactus... err a Decepticon trying to hug Ironhide would be a more appropriate description now.
"Worthless bitch!" Belt snapping down across my flesh. A wale of agony. Voices in my head, tentacles ripping and tearing...
I gave a sharp keen, servos coming up to clamp down on my audios. Why wouldn't the voices go away? Why was the presence trying to hurt me? I gave a sharp sob and curled in on myself. Everything was so distorted, memories flowing to and fro in a giant collage.
Suddenly I felt warm servos slip around me. I immediately thrashed trying to get away, but the grip tightened. It wasn't painful, but it was firm and gentle. I could feel the other body slide around me, or was I sitting on it? Everything distorted. Creeping, swaying.
-tentacles lashing, stinging, trapping. Pain, fear, agony...- I could feel warmth in my chassis suddenly, three different distinct traces. One I knew from hours of intimacy, Blue... Another, stronger, my guardian. Prowl?
The last one I wasn't sure, it wasn't as distinct as the other two. However, it was still there. The only thing I could think of was the eldest, he was connected to the other two through their own bond. Smokescreen.
Why are they all in my head? I could feel them; they were like giant rocks in the thrashing ocean storm. Soothing presses, careful hands holding me up. A wall coming up to block the intrusion. I could feel the warm frame beneath me shift, anger, and revulsion entering my mind. Horror came next along with the onslaught of my memories.
-Worthless.-
.:Don't listen… not true.:. One of the voices crooned in my audio, a gentle brush knocking the memory out of sight.
-Stupid.-
.:He's wrong... so wrong.:. Another of the voices said, anger and sorrow mixed into the tone.
-Mistake.-
.:Never a mistake, never. Don't listen...:. I wanted to cry and curl into a ball, but I couldn't move. The waves were crashing over my head, memories long forgotten and new bombarding my mind. My thoughts were acidic, detrimental to myself and the mechs in my helm.
"You little bitch! Don't you ever fucking scream again!" A knife zipping down, cutting across my throat... couldn't breath. Blood everywhere, sirens... police... back in the evil man's presence. They gave me back...
.:Primus... no wonder...:.
Another keen left my throat at the next memory segment that broke loose. Pieces flying outward for inspection, tormenting me.
"I see you're home. Finally come back from your romp you little slut." Disgust and anger rushed through me. How dare he! He took a step closer and my blade suddenly whipped out. I held it in front of me shakily and silently dared him to take a step closer. He glanced from the knife to me and suddenly started laughing.
"You think that fazes me? I've killed people, and you're no different from others in my book." Suddenly he dropped the chains and pulled out a huge gutting knife. My own small knife clattered to the ground as fear swept through me. He... he wouldn't... would he? As if reading my expression his cold laughter echoed around me.
"I will do it. You're pathetic! Just like your slut of a mother." Angry tears blurred my vision as I stared up at the man I was forced to call father. Turning I quickly opened my door and slipped in, my father tried to follow, his knife flinging at me wildly. I shoved my meager body weight against the door, trying to close it. After a moment, his arm slipped away and the door slid shut. Locking it I raced for the window and tried to open it. I pulled and yanked on it as the sound of splintering would echoed behind me. A silent sob made its way up my throat as I yanked on the window, my fathers form burst through the shredded door way, his knife sinking deep into my side. Blood spurted from my mouth and onto the window as I collapsed. The blade sunk into my ribcage, no doubt puncturing a lung, if the drowning feeling and gurgling was any indication. Sinking to the floor, I felt chains being clamped tightly onto my hands behind my back, and clamping my ankles together. Shackles. I thought distantly.
Closing my eyes tightly I waited for the finishing blow, but it never came. Instead, I was dragged through the house, painfully down the stairs, and out the back door. The grass ripped and tore at my cloths and skin. Turning he picked up a rock and before I could move slammed it into the base of my scull. My body went limp and everything faded to black.
I could feel horror come through, one distinctly belonging to my mate. I reached for him silently, praying he wouldn't turn his back on me. I could feel a brush against my paneling, the smooth crooning of an engine as I was held close. The bond, all of them, reached back to me. Silently pulling me to the surface.
"Although I suggest you take it easy for awhile. Your guardian shall be here within the hour." With that he turned away and walked from the room, the others fallowing him. My blood turned to ice in my veins, my heart clenched tightly and felt as if it stopped. I couldn't think, nor could I breathe. They found him... they contacted him... oh God... I'm gonna die.
More pain echoed through the bond. Realization that they had failed me, pain sweeping into me along with a mental crushing hug.
"You think you could get away? You think you can run from me?" I shook my head negatively; dread coiling in the pits of my stomach. Suddenly leather slashed across my already raw back. I arched in agony, my mouth open in a silent scream, blood trailing down my spine lazily as every slash pulsed with the beat of my heart.
"Answer me!" He roared. But I couldn't and he knew that.
"You're a whore just like your mother! I'll show you!" Cold dread spilled into me again, as I heard the whip collapse against the ground. A belt buckle clinking, my panties were ripped away before something pressed near my entrance. I squirmed in terror trying to get away. This man had stolen everything from me. Not my innocence! No! Pain shot through me as he sheathed himself inside me, a silent cry let my lips as agonizing pain swept through me.
Horror and anger as the memory rolled through were the only reactions I got. I could feel the tentacles start to relinquish their grip, before a flood of memories came rushing at me. Suddenly, the bonds started tightening as walls came up to protect me mentally. After a moment the memories subsided, and the bonds were slowly slipping from my consciousness.
I flickered my optics online and looked around disoriented. Warm servos were holding me gently, rocking me gently as if I were a sparkling. I saw the black-and-white paint, but not much more. I snuggled closer, my engine hiccupping as I curled into my Guardian.
I could hear his spark, thrumming back to me. Gentle pulses that I somehow wanted to listen to forever. A warm servo smoothed over my helm, the other holding me up carefully. I darkened my optics, and for once I felt only peace in my mind.
No torrent of agony, it was relaxing. I picked up on the sound of humming, a lullaby by the sound of it. The voice was deep, but not gravely or scary like. It was soothing, a deep croon. My optic shutters felt heavy, my systems slowly shutting down. Blissful recharge swept through and took me away, like the swift brush of paint across a canvas.