Chapter 1 : Glory Box
After everybody went to their stations and the jump occurred, Sarah took the opportunity to hide herself from all the commotion she unwillingly became part of moments before. She saw everybody so happy after Sean arrived with such fanfare, like the show man he was, and kissed her somehow expecting her to melt into his arms and had the happy ending of a story… yeah right, she thought.
Sarah was surprised, there was no doubt about it, however she was very reluctant to melt into someone's arms or accept all this just as her parents and Sean's parents seemed to celebrate. Sure, everybody knew their difficult relationship from childhood and expected… something like this.
She needed space and solitude. Thankfully the SDF-3 was huge and there were corners after corners and secret hallways that no one would know about. There were a lot of good things about being the daughter of two Admiralds, and she was able to get inside during construction with her brother more than once.
Ben was probably the only one who could find her in case she went missing inside the big ship.
Sarah sat in the dark, holding her knees with her arms trying to process what happened. It took her so much time to get the idea of not seeing Sean ever again, or maybe a lot of years in the future, and there he was, somewhere inside the ship being praised for the "bravery" of getting inside before they were gone for good.
Sarah frowned. What bravery? Stupidity! she thought to herself.
Like it was nothing, we declared to her, and to the world, that he wanted her. How? she repeated over and over again. She was 17 when she told him, after a lot of consideration and self preparation, that she had feelings for him. Strong feelings. Until then, she still had a little hope inside her that if she came forward, it would help him take the next step towards her. But nothing prepared her for his brutal answer, his mocking… the humiliation of being exposed.
Sarah closed her eyes and let herself cry in silence. She hated crying so much.
In her mind, what he said, what he did, was just some kind of twisted justification for not being alone. The only thing he truly loved beside his designs, was his family, including the extended ones, and they were all going to space. He just realized at the last minute what it would mean for him and changed his mind. And he would never - ever - admit he was a mom and dad's boy. To seem "in love" was a better excuse and gave him that Knight aura girl like so much.
Her head was spinning around with all this. Once again, he found a way to ridicule her infront of everybody. All this angered her, made her sick.
After a half hour she realized she needed support, someone who truly cared for her. She grabbed her phone and texted "mom, I need you". The answer was immediate. "I know, come to my office in 15".
She smiled to herself. Sarah didn't care how old she was, she could always count with Lisa for everything. She cleaned her face with her sleeve and stood up.
—-
Sarah stood outside Lisa's office waiting for her new assistant to pay attention to her.
"Yes?" asked the young officer.
"Capitan Sarah Hunter waiting for Admiral Hayes ma'am." She said seriously.
The girl called Lisa inside the office.
"You can come in," she offered.
"Thank you" she replied politely.
"Captain Hunter", saluted Lisa when Sarah got in. She saluted back "Close the door please".
Sarah did as told and as soon the door was shut, she turned around and hid her face in her hands sobbing.
"Mom!" she exclaimed and Lisa was in a second hugging her.
"My poor baby" she said in full mother role.
Lisa's and Rick's offices were on opposite sides of the SDF-3, and their design was simple but comfortable. They were both made with soundproof barriers, so nobody was able to overhear an unexpected conversation, or at least, that was the reason they put it on paper. They both were, even at their age, quite the adventurous couple.
They hugged each other for a while and Lisa let Sarah cry freely in her arms. She knew Sarah was going to approach her because of what happened.
"I want to apologize," said Lisa, kissing her cheek while holding her face like when she was a child. "I am sorry I reacted that way".
"It's Ok mom" she answered sadly "I know how important it is for you to have all of us aboard".
"Not just that" Lisa explained tenderly "I know how you feel about Sean and when I saw that, well… it seems quite romantic" she admitted, a little ashamed.
Sarah rolled her eyes "I know… some years ago I would probably feel the same way" she admitted.
They both crossed the room holding each other and sat on the couch. Sarah rested her head on her mother's shoulder.
"How long do you have?" asked the younger woman.
"Plenty" replied Lisa holding her "I told you father you were coming in and he is taking care of everything. It's quite nice to be able to split the responsibilities between two" she smiled.
"Yeah, for short periods of time. I don't think dad has as much patience with the newbies, like you" she joked a little less worried. Lisa laughed softly, "you know your father well", she simply said.
Sarah sighed feeling a little more protected from the world, in this case, the SDF-3.
"What am I going to do? I must be the laughingstock of the fleet" she asked ashamed. Lisa rubbed her arms reassuringly.
"You know it's not going to be like that. They are way too afraid of me" she offered with a wink.
"Sure, in front of me, maybe" Sarah added sadly "but behind my back, I am just a joke. I've worked so hard to earn my position on my own merits, but Sean erased everything in 5 minutes".
"It's true, some archaists will think that. But you can't live considering what others are going to think about you constantly. You just have to do your job the best you can and let your actions speak for you," Lisa told her, stroking her hair. "Besides, Lunatic Sean kissing you in front of everyone, I don't think it will greatly affect their respect for you," she offered with a reassuring smile.
"I hope so, I don't like to be in the spotlight" said Sarah but Lisa left her eyebrow incredulously. "Well…" added the young woman honestly "not in the spotlight for something like that!".
"That's more likely…" joked Lisa. Sarah Smiled.
"I don't want to see him, mom. I don't know how I feel about all this" Sarah wondered worriedly. Lisa held her hands tenderly.
"Do you still love him?" she asked.
"I don't know…" replied Sarah confused "I got to the idea that I was never going to see him again, that he was part of the past and the history that I was leaving on Earth. Going to the stars meant a new beginning, new possibilities. The opportunity to, perhaps, some day to meet someone that I liked, that he liked me back and had a healthy, normal, calm relationship, like Ben and Lizzy, for example".
"You brother and Lizzy are the exception of the rule, my love" Lisa said sadly to her "All the couples I know, including your father and myself, have been quite the roller coaster, to say the least!. But listen to me. You don't owe Sean anything. If he likes you now, and you don't, bad luck! He had his chance with you, several times! even Claudia is on your side in this. Sure, we would love it if the two of you worked things out, but if it doesn't happen, so be it. As he got all the freedom to say and did what he did to you, you too have the freedom to act as you wish", said Lisa Matter of factly.
"I do?" Sarah asked distressingly. "Because I feel right now that there is some kind of leash around me forcing me in a direction. His direction" she added.
"Not at all!" Lisa said holding her lovingly "you are absolutely free to do as you want! If you want to leave him out of your life, you can. If you want to be with him, you can. If you want to make him work for you, to fight for your feelings well, I must say… he deserves it", said Lisa with a little sparkle of revenge in her eyes.
"You are scary sometimes, mom", and Sarah rolled her eyes at her "he is your godson".
"And I love him dearly. But he totally deserves to suffer a little, you know? for his own sake. Plus, Claudia feels the same and she gave birth to him! for all the women out there, he does deserve a little of his own medicine". Then Lisa added calmly "Do as you want, you are free, do not feel pushed to do anything because you saw us acting in a certain way", then Lisa cleaned Sarah's tears from her face. Sarah nodded feeling like a ton left her body.
"Thank you mom" she said and she hugged her tightly "I don't care how old I am, I need you and I love you so, so much".
Lisa's heart skipped a bit with emotion "I know baby, I love you too" she replied and kissed her on her cheek "everything will be alright, I promise".
Sarah got up, Lisa helped her arrange her uniforme, cleaned her face and told her to stand tall and proud. She did.
When Sarah opened the door she saw Ben sitting on a chair, waiting. She smiled at him and he smiled back, relieved to see his sister.
"You can go in now," offered Lisa's assistant.
"Good afternoon Captain Hunter" saluted Lisa from the inside of her office. Ben stood up, saluted back and let himself inside his mother's office.
Having children is a non stop job, thought Lisa happily.
—-
Feeling much better after talking to Lisa, Sarah walked to the pilots lounge and stood by. Here she was in her element, feeling herself again and not like a puppet. While checking her charts for the day, Dana and Lizzy found her finally.
"There you are!" said Dana happily "I thought you took your VF and went back to Earth, alone, you know, with the music behind you saying goodbye to the sequel" she joked.
"Funny…" answered Sarah sarcastically.
"Where were you?," asked Lizzy, a little worried for her friend.
"First just hiding from everyone and then with my mom" she truthfully admitted.
"Lisa gives the best advice. If you asked my mom she probably would give you a gun to shoot Sean in the head" Dana added, and the three women nodded knowingly.
"So, what are you going to do about Sean?" Lizzy asked softly.
"I don't know. I just don't want to see him right now. I need some room to breathe and collect my thoughts…"
"What thoughts?" asked Sean Fokker calmly leaning on the door.
"Shit," said Sarah, feeling a headache coming on.
"Not the reaction I was expecting, Stick," said the man walking, smiling charmingly and ineffectively at the 3 women who had known him since childhood.
Lizzy stood up, crossing her arms in front of him.
"It is not a good time Sean" she warned him. The young and beautiful blond woman was well known for her sweetness, inheritance of her mother, but quite over-protected of her own, and in her heart, Dana and Sarah were her sisters. They practically raise her to be a pilot, an ability she got from his father.
Sean raised an eyebrow to her without understanding what was happening. In his mind he was the hero of the day.
"Look Sean…" said Dana standing next to Lizzy "I must admit that like many people I celebrate your atypical entrance today. But it was all a little… too much" said the woman using her best "older sister" vibe with him. "Give Sarah time".
"Did I do something wrong?" asked, genuinely, the clueless scientist. Lizzy and Dana rolled their eyes.
"Just… go away Sean…" said Sarah from her sit, not wanting to look at him
He frowned, not understanding her reaction. Wasn't he getting into a VF and going to her at the last minute what she wanted?
"Isn't this what you wanted?" he asked, just speaking his mind. Lizzy and Dana looked at each other with wide eyes, knowing quite well what was going to happen.
Sarah stood up deadly slowly. Both women move at the side and give her the space in front of Sean.
"I didn't ask for ANY of this" she hissed dangerously at him. His always present smirk erased from his handsome face "You came here, not caring about ANYTHING or ANYONE and, as always, do as you pleased. You kissed me in front of EVERYBODY and put me in the spotlight of an non-existent soap opera destroying in one fell swoop years of work that it has taken me to demonstrate my abilities, my own merits. But what are you going to know about that! The boy genius has never had to prove anything to anyone because of his exceptional brain!" she said acidly at him.
"Thank you for that last part" Sean frowned obnoxiously. "I honestly thought that after years of you whipping over me, this would be what you want".
Lizzy and Dana closed their eyes, waiting for the strike, but Sarah stood there just speechless looking at him incredulously.
"Well, to update your information, I stopped whipping over you a long time ago, when I realized that you were not the person I thought you were," said Sarah, feeling the pain and anger inside her.
"If you came all the way here for that reason, then I am sorry you lost your flight" she added sarcastically "maybe you can go and whipping on your parents shoulders about the skinny girl who doesn't love you anymore" she said said venomously, enjoying how he felt back with her words even more than with a punch.
Dana got in between them, trying to put some control over the situation.
"Sean, you need to go, NOW. Sarah, get your charts, we are going out on a reconnaissance flight. God knows you need to blast something", she commended grabbing her by the shoulder and pushing her to the flying platform. Lizzy took hers and Sarah's instructions, gave Sean an ugly look and walked away behind her squad.
Sean stood there in complete stupor. He never, ever, thought that Sarah, his Stick, would be able to say such harsh things to him. Looking as the Skull Squadron took off into space, Sean stood there trying to digest what happened. On the other side of the platform, Roy Fokker watched his only son and thought how he could be so smart for some things and such an idiot for others.
