A/N: Hi!
It's been years (and a whole pandemic) since I wrote any Olitz fic... but then I met Kerry on her book tour last year and also finished rewatching Scandal completely a few weeks ago. It made me miss writing Olitz SO much, so this post season 7 fic was born.
Enjoy!
"Hi."
"Hi."
A beat passes and relief washes over them because it's over, it's finally over. They both find themselves smiling at each other.
What will you do instead?
Whatever I want.
Mellie's words and her own echo in Olivia's head. Without giving it a thought, she takes four steps forward and closes the gap between them, reaching up to cup the back of Fitz's neck as she kisses him soundly on the lips. She feels his surprise at her boldness, given how public they are, but then he relaxes into it, and his mouth curves into a smile against hers. When she breaks the kiss, he sees so much light and warmth in her eyes that it makes his heart thud in his chest.
"What are you doing here?"
"Thought you might want a ride."
He steps aside, letting her slide into the backseat before he gets in next to her, closing the door. With the world shut away and the hum of DC blocked by the tinted windows of the SUV, she arches her brow teasingly.
"If I didn't know any better, I'd think you were stalking me."
"You know, we just drive around town, picking up beautiful women," He jokes, smirking as he throws a glance at Luther, his secret service agent awaiting orders in the driver's seat, "I like to think we're helping out the community."
It has the desired effect and she laughs; it's his favorite sound in the world. She gives him a playful shove. "Shut up."
"Where are you headed? Home?"
"Yeah."
"Luther, you know the drill."
"Of course, sir." Luther nods and quietly relays their destination to the rest of his security detail as Fitz pushes a button to raise the privacy partition.
When they're finally alone, he turns to her with a boyish grin and asks, "Wanna make out?"
"Later, mister," Olivia smiles, her old nickname for him rolls off her tongue easily, "I was going to call you."
"Yeah?"
"What are you doing for the weekend?"
"I'm wide open."
"I was thinking… How would you like to spend some time in Vermont? Just the two of us."
"Really?" He's visibly taken aback and she understands why; the last time she'd visited for a 'long weekend' had been one of the hardest, most painful things they'd gone through together.
"Yes."
"You're sure?"
"Yes," She reaches over to take his hand and strokes her thumb over his knuckles, trying to gently reassure him, "I want to see our house."
It's not lost on her why tears spring to his eyes; for almost two years he's been living in the house he built for her – for them – alone, with all hope it could ever be theirs lost. He'd never imagined he'd hear her refer to his home as their own, not just 'the house' said in a vague, non-committal way.
But she says 'our house' with so much earnest certainty in her voice, he knows she means it.
"Okay. I'll make the arrangements and we'll fly out this afternoon."
When they pull up outside her apartment she makes him wait in the car while she packs a bag for the weekend. She knows him – them – too well, and the chance of them getting naked within five minutes of being inside her place is high. As much as she loves making love to him, she wants to be in Vermont before it grows dark.
Over thirty minutes pass and he glances out of the window to see her walking out of the building, trailing a small suitcase behind her with a gray herringbone coat draped over her arm, alongside her purse. He steps out of the car and smiles as he takes in her new outfit; she's wearing a soft cream cashmere sweater over a pair of figure-hugging navy jeans, plus she's opted to switch her stiletto pumps with some slightly more practical leather ankle boots, though there's still a sizable 5-inch heel on them. Vermont-casual looks good on her.
He takes her suitcase from her and loads it into the trunk, thankful that his security detail allow him a small moment of normality. When he opens the door of the SUV for her, she doesn't get in right away, instead choosing to reach up to pull him down for another bold kiss. Just because she can.
Conversation on the short flight comes easily, it's a stark contrast to the last time; he remembers the way Olivia had held his hand and tucked her head against his shoulder while his throat burned with the effort to fight back tears. At the time, he'd assumed it would likely be the last time she ever visited the house and she'd hate him, but thankfully, in time, he's been proven wrong.
They make the descent into Rutland and the helicopter touches down in the front yard. The chopper blades slow as they step out onto the dewy grass. He reaches for her suitcase to carry it for her, then takes her hand and leads the way onto the stone pathway. A few feet from the front door, her fingers slip from his and when he turns back to her, there's a look of nervous apprehension on her face.
"Liv?"
"I… I'm just–" She stutters, clearly frustrated with herself. "I'm sorry, this is stupid."
"Hey, hey, it's okay," He says softly, lifting her chin to make her meet his gaze, reminding her that she's safe with him. "Talk to me."
"Can we go in through the back?" She asks in a quiet voice, brows drawn together in a frown. "I just – after last time I was here…"
Last time I was here was one of the hardest things I've ever gone through. Last time I was here everybody I cared about cornered me and made me feel like I was a caged animal. Last time I was here you walked me through that door and betrayed me.
Olivia doesn't have to say it, Fitz knows where her thoughts are. If he'd had any other options to try to pull her out of the dark place she'd slipped into, he would've taken them, but at the time he'd seen it as a necessary last resort. Though it hadn't worked out, he doesn't regret trying to help her face who she was turning into, but he can't blame her for feeling overwhelmed at the idea of stepping through that door with him, like she had months ago.
"Sure, we can do that. Of course, we can."
He pulls her hand into hers and laces their fingers together as they walk around the side of the house, past the long rows of fruit trees that make up the expansive orchards she remembers him talking about the first time she'd visited. He only lets go of her hand when they reach the huge sliding doors and he pulls them open. Her eyes travel around the room and take in all the little details she'd missed before, like the cozy blankets draped over the backs of the couches, and the way the warm sunlight spills into the room from the huge windows. The place has a decidedly masculine feel to it, but not in an unwelcome way; it just feels like Fitz.
A wave of nostalgia hits her as memories of the first night she'd spent here flood her brain. He steps inside to set her case down and when he turns to face her, he follows her gaze to the crackling fire warming the room.
"Liv?" He's immediately concerned by the dazed expression on her face and he worries she's not ready for this, but then her eyes lock on his and a slow smile edges onto her face. "Oh – oh."
"I was just thinking about the night we spent here, the first time." She murmurs, her voice low and seductive, adding to the visuals of one of their most passionate times together.
"Yeah?" He draws his bottom lip between his teeth as he walks over, reaching behind her to slide the door shut. "Well, I could give you a tour of the house, or..."
"Or what?" Her hand slides up his black sweater and she caresses her thumb over the exposed skin at the base of his neck.
"Or we could find another way to spend our afternoon," He teases, crowding her against the glass and pressing his hips purposefully into hers, "Your choice."
She runs her tongue between her teeth, appearing to consider her options, and then she leans in close, just barely dragging her lips over his as she speaks, "Take me upstairs… And you can show me the skylight."
He laughs in spite of himself. Of course, his plan to tease her has completely backfired, because now she's teasing him. She slips out of his arms to place her purse and coat down on the nearest armchair, then turns around to find him shaking his head at her.
"I've been thinking about it since you mentioned it years ago," She's grinning openly, enjoying how easy he makes it for her to rile him up, "C'mon."
Fitz smiles as he watches Olivia trail her hand along a bookshelf, fingertips grazing the spines of his collection of first edition classics. Her eyes warm when she looks up at him.
"This is amazing, Fitz," She utters in awe, gently plucking a copy of A. A. Milne's Winnie the Pooh off the shelf, "I can't believe you did this."
"I used to read that to Teddy all the time." He comments as he settles on the cream sectional, leaning back with his hands behind his head.
"I remember." Her eyes lift from the tiny illustrations on the pages she's flicking through. It's one of the only moments, since she lived with him for a short few months in the White House, that she's ever directly referenced that time.
They've taken a short tour of the upstairs, with him showing her a couple of guest rooms, Karen's room, Teddy's room, and they're in the library now. He hasn't had time to use it much yet, but it still feels cozy and inviting. She can already imagine lighting the small log burner in the corner of the room, along with a few scented candles, and curling up next to him with a book from his expansive collection to spend a lazy afternoon reading together.
Her favorite feature of the library is, of course, the stained glass skylight he'd talked about all those years ago. She'd gasped as soon as she'd stepped into the room, taking in the warm light refracting through the colored glass above. Unlike the rich browns and reds in the rest of the house, the space is decorated in pale neutrals, with creams and muted grays; the blank canvas of the room only enhances the pretty colors shining through the delicate floral design of the skylight.
Olivia carefully tucks the book back in its spot on the shelf and makes her way over to join Fitz, letting him pull her onto the sofa next to him. She spends a moment, her eyes drifting over the room to take it in again.
"It's beautiful, Fitz. You did such a great job." She states softly, wanting him to know how much she loves the place because even without her belongings and her own little touches to the decor, it feels like home. When her eyes meet his, her breath hitches in her chest because he looks so moved.
"You're here." He rasps, swallowing against the sharp knot in his throat.
With a faint smile, she nods, "I'm here."
She feels it too, the emotional weight on his heart, pressing against his chest, making it hard to breathe. It's a lot. He's been waiting for this day for a painfully long time; now that it's real and she's sitting with him beneath the skylight, in the house he built for her, it's overwhelming.
"I'm here." She repeats herself, blinking back tears.
"Liv, this is it, right? Because I... I can't –" Fitz stammers out like the words are lodged in his throat.
"Hey, shhhh," Olivia tries to soothe him, cupping his face gently with both hands, stroking his cheeks with her thumbs, "I know what this means to you and there is nowhere I'd rather be than right here with you. I'm done running. Done fighting this. I just want to be with you."
"You have to mean it because I can't take another break-up with you," He whispers hoarsely, his chest tightening with emotion, "I won't survive it."
"I know, I couldn't take it either. I mean, after last time –" She cuts herself off with a shake of her head, swallowing hard.
"I almost lost you, I can't go through that again. You can't do that to me again." He doesn't mean for it to sound so accusatory, but she gets it and she can't blame him after everything she's put him through.
"I don't want to keep hurting you, Fitz. And I know you don't completely trust me yet," She holds his gaze as she speaks with conviction, wanting to convey the sincerity of her words, "But I promise I'm going to earn that from you."
He draws her into a hug and buries his face in the warmth of her neck, exhaling a shuddery sigh. She caresses her fingers through his hair to lightly scratch his scalp, letting him pull her closer as he breathes in, taking comfort in the familiarity of her scent.
"Thank you for saying that, it – it means a lot." He murmurs after a while and it's clear how much he's needed to hear it from her.
"Never breaking up with you again, never," Her words come out in a fierce whisper as she sinks deeper into his arms, melting into him, "I love you too much to ever lose you again."
When he lifts his head they're both crying, tears escaping their eyes. She hasn't been able to tell him 'I love you' for almost two years – not since those final nights at the end of his second term. Always hushed murmurs in the heat of passion, never said boldly in the light of day.
"I love you." She says it again, keeping her eyes fixed on his, trying to convey her true, raw feelings.
He's too overwhelmed to say anything, so he captures her lips in a meaningful kiss, pouring all his emotion into it. They just kiss and hold each other for a few minutes, communicating physically because it's the best way they know how. When they finally pull away, the tears are dry and they share a slow smile.
"Will you show me our bedroom?"
Fitz nods, clearing his throat, "Of course."
Taking Olivia by the hand, he leads her out of the library and to the door at the end of the hall, letting her open it. She steps inside the spacious room, surprised to find there's no furniture and the walls are bare and white, ready to be repainted.
"It's empty," It's more of a question than a statement and she gives him a curious look before asking, "Where have you been sleeping?"
"In a guest room downstairs," He hesitates briefly, scratching the back of his head, "I always pictured us decorating it together, but it didn't feel right without you, so…"
He isn't trying to make her feel guilty, but the feeling settles over her, weighing heavy on her heart. When she doesn't say anything, he approaches her and lays a hand against the small of her back.
"I didn't know what to do with this room, so I left it alone and pretended it didn't exist."
Whatever I want.
"This could still be our room. I mean, I want that. I want to start building our life together," She turns and rests her palms on his chest, taking a moment to steel herself and prepare for the potential of being rejected before her eyes meet his, "Is that what you want?"
"Are you kidding, Livvie?" He grins warmly as he sees her reaction to being called 'Livvie' again; her breath catches audibly and her eyes glisten with fresh tears. "I've waited years for you to be on the same page as me."
He draws her in for a long, sweet kiss, gently nipping at her bottom lip to make her moan quietly. Her tongue slips into his mouth as she tries to deepen the kiss, but he stops her, chuckling at the annoyed whine that escapes her throat.
"Fitz –"
"We've got the whole weekend, what's the rush?"
She narrows her eyes at him, her full lips curving into a pout. "You're mean."
"Would it help if I told you there's a huge whirlpool tub in the ensuite?" He smirks when she throws her head back with a groan.
"Just when I thought I couldn't want you more."
He can't resist giving her a pat on the ass as he pulls away, heading back towards the door.
"C'mon, I'm cooking dinner for you."
"I can't believe you've been holding out on me!" Olivia groans on another mouthful of tarte tatin, licking the sweet caramel off her lips.
"What do you mean?" Fitz sinks into the couch next to her, spearing a piece of syrupy apple with his fork.
"You can cook. All those years, you never made me dinner –"
"– Actually, I didn't learn how to cook until after I left office," He interjects, clearly amused at her adorable frown as she tries to stay mad, "I had my share of culinary disasters when I came out here, but now I have a few recipes under my belt and you get to reap the benefits."
She hums in agreement and swallows another bite, twirling her fork between her thumb and forefinger. They finish dessert and he takes her dish to set it down on the end table with his.
"I'll have to find a new recipe to make for you, those were some of the last apples of the season."
"From the orchards?"
"Yeah."
"How about something with chocolate?"
"Maybe truffles?" He pauses thoughtfully, lifting her legs onto his lap to draw her closer, "Or once, I had this incredible chocolate torte on a visit to Austria."
"Mmm, I'll happily volunteer as a taste tester." She offers with a smile, threading her fingers through his hair, distractedly playing with his curls.
"I'm starting to think you only want me for my food."
She deadpans, "That's an accurate assessment."
"I have other talents, you know?" A wolfish grin tugs at his mouth as his hand slides up the inside of her thigh, his thumb running along the seam below the zipper of her jeans, "I'm not just good at cooking, I'm good at eating too."
"Oh my god, I can't stand you!" She half grimaces, half laughs at his comment, and grumbles, pulling his hand away, "Stop, I'm too full to have sex with you right now."
He chuckles wryly, "I guess I only have myself to blame for that."
"Mmhm. Definitely your fault."
"Wanna watch a movie?"
She leans over to lift her wine glass off the coffee table and takes a sip, considering the idea. Then she shakes her head, "No. Why don't we listen to some music and keep talking? I like talking to you."
That makes him smile, "Okay."
A few minutes later, he's set up the bluetooth speakers and – much to her amusement – proudly connects his phone, then turns on his Spotify playlist. Al Green begins to play and he grins at her.
"It's awesome, did you know you can find pretty much any song? Any artist?"
She doesn't answer his questions, hiding a smile behind her hand, "You're cute."
"Are you laughing at me?"
"No, of course not," She feigns innocence but her smirk remains on her face, "I think the discoveries you've made with your newfound freedom with technology are adorable."
"You're making fun of me." He narrows his eyes into a teasing glare at her and slides his hand behind to squeeze her ass.
"There's nothing wrong with learning how to use the internet at your age."
"At my age?" He repeats with wide eyes, pretending to be outraged as he pinches her ass cheek roughly in retaliation.
A squeal escapes her throat and she giggles, "Fitz!"
It's so easy to flirt and play with each other like this again. Rather than dwelling on all the time they've lost, he's grateful beyond measure to have her back in his life, so happy and free, teasing him like she used to. It's only when the music switches through Aretha Franklin, Bill Withers and Curtis Mayfield that she realizes he's not put his playlist on shuffle, and – naturally – she teases him even more.
An hour passes and they continue to talk about everything and nothing. Their conversation is so effortless, so natural that he catches them both off guard when he brings up her most recent visit.
"Did you think after the last time you were here you'd ever be back?" His question is suddenly sobering and he isn't even sure where it came from, but he realizes immediately that he has to know and they have to have this talk.
She averts her gaze, still harboring shame over what happened, what she did. He can see her fight-or-flight response kicking in as she sets her glass down and shifts away to immediately withdraw from him to the other end of the couch.
"Hey, Liv, don't run," His voice is gentle enough that it makes her pause, exhaling a breath she didn't know she was holding, "It's okay, it's just me."
"You really want to talk about this?" She gives him a wary look, tears pricking her eyes.
"It's just… You're here and I can't help but think about it. I've replayed it in my mind over and over since that day," A tired sigh escapes him and he closes his eyes for a second, then he locks his gaze on hers, "You hurt me. Maybe more than you've ever hurt me before."
There's a sad, faraway look on his face and it breaks her heart because she did this. She knows this is a difficult conversation and ordinarily, she would do anything in her power to avoid it, but she knows he needs this. He deserves answers, so she takes a minute to steel herself, ready to respond and take any questions he might have.
"I wanted to hurt you. I did, I can't lie to you. I was in so much pain, I wanted you to feel it too."
"You blamed me." He surmises, watching as she nods slowly.
"I did. I knew things were spiraling because of me, but I couldn't accept it. If I did that, I'd have to look at myself more closely…" She trails off, the uncomfortable feeling of guilt and shame settling over her. "My gut was telling me that I was wrong, but I wasn't listening to it anymore."
"When did you know you were going to lie?" He asks tentatively, unsure if he even wants to know.
"You lied first." She deflects, fixing him with a look he can't quite read.
"I did, but it was with good reason. I'd tried to help you so many times already, but you shut me out. This was a last resort, I was desperate."
"I know that, I do. It was just so hard to know you did it to me, in this house."
"That's my only regret. I don't want you to feel like you're still trapped here –"
"– I don't."
"This is your home, not a cage." The second Fitz says it, he sees how much she's needed to hear that and they sit in the moment, silent for a while.
Olivia moves back over to tuck herself against his shoulder, cuddling into his side.
"I knew I was going to lie to you after you stood outside that room and tried to talk to me," She speaks finally, throwing a glance down the hall behind him, "I'd spent all night listening to everybody's appeals, but you? Your perspective, you seeing me that way, it made it real and I just – I couldn't face it. I had to hide."
He stays silent but gently rubs her shoulder to reassure her, letting her continue to talk as much as she needs to.
"I hated lying to you, I truly did. And you didn't make it easy, being so good and supportive to me. When you held me after I said I'd resign, I thought –" She has to pause as a tiny sob catches in her throat, "I thought it might be the last time. I knew you were going to hate me after everything."
"I didn't hate you, Liv," He sighs and then adds as an afterthought, "Even with all the shit you did the past year, I could never hate you."
She reaches up to cup his cheek and forces him to meet her watery gaze. "I'm sorry for doing that to you."
"I know." He brushes away her tears, gently cradling her jaw in his palms.
"I stopped being the woman you love."
"You lost yourself for a while but you're still you, Liv. I still love you."
"I don't deserve you," Her brows furrow and her chin quivers with the effort to stop crying, "How can you love me, after everything I did? Everything I did to you?"
"Because even when you stopped trusting your gut, I still trusted mine when it came to you. I know you, I know your heart. I knew that in the end, you'd do the right thing because you had to. You wouldn't be you if you didn't," His head tilts to one side and his brows lift slightly, "Does that make sense?"
"Yes," She loops her arms around his neck and buries her face against his chest, "Thank you."
"For what?"
"For still seeing me."
They both fall into a comfortable silence, processing their heavy, but long-overdue conversation. Otis Redding's raw, soulful voice sounds from the speaker as I'll Let Nothing Separate Us begins to play. The lyrics seem to speak directly to their relationship and the struggles they've been dealt with for more than a decade. They move together at the same time and their lips meet in a slow, gentle kiss.
When this whole world, comes to an end
I'll be standing there
Holding your trembling hand
They're so in sync, they breathe each other in. There's no urgency; for the first time in their relationship, they truly have all the time in the world. Nobody is going to interrupt them or cut things short, neither of them have anywhere else to be the next day or something that requires their attention at work. They're able to just be. They can just kiss and kiss, over and over, without racing to tear each other's clothes off.
But the sweet dreams I dream at night baby
They're all about loving you
Wanting you and needing you, ooh darling, now
Her soft lips part on a breathy sigh when his hands stroke down her back to span her waist, his fingers digging into the soft cashmere of her sweater.
"So gorgeous." He whispers between kisses, bumping his nose against hers as they share a smile.
And I'll just be right with you baby
Darling 'til the end
The song finishes and switches to something else, but they're too lost in kissing each other to notice. The world falls away with every soft brush of their lips and the only sounds they're conscious of are their own quiet moans, sighs, and their heated, uneven breaths.
Olivia hopes the novelty of being able to kiss – just kiss – for as long as they want will never grow old, but then all thoughts of just kissing disappear when she feels Fitz pulling her into his lap and she smirks against his lips.
"You want me?" She asks in a low murmur, already knowing the answer but wanting to tease him anyway.
"Always." He growls into her mouth, clenching his jaw when she slips a hand between them, palming his stiffening length through his jeans.
She edges back, taking his hand to look at his watch. It's early, barely just past eight o'clock, but he's already shifting his hips restlessly underneath her.
"If you're patient and wait a little, I'll take off my clothes," She pauses to lick at the corner of her lips, gazing down at him with a smile when he groans quietly at just the idea of her being naked, "And I'll put on something special for you."
There's something about her wearing lingerie just for him to appreciate and peel off her body, for him alone, that sends a possessive chill down his spine and he finds himself nodding, breathing hard.
"Go, now." He grits out, bunching his hands into fists to stop himself from losing all self-control, ripping her clothes off right there.
Olivia's gaze is warm when she steps out of the ensuite, locking eyes with Fitz across the room. He's already stripped out of his clothes and now he's sitting in bed, naked apart from the sheet draped over his lap.
"Hi."
"Fuck."
"No 'hi' back?" She pouts playfully as she turns, giving him a view from behind. She glances back at him, amused to find his eyes fixed on her ass.
The lingerie set is simple but pretty, comprised of a balconette bra and matching thong. The blush-colored silk compliments her skin tone beautifully and the delicate lace trim sits perfectly on her hips. She twirls for him and poses with a hand on her hip, letting out a tiny giggle as he catches his bottom lip between his teeth and grins at her.
"Do you like it?" Her eyes sparkle, watching his gaze roam her curves freely.
"Like it? Livvie, you better get your ass over here, right now." He kneels up and reaches for her, unbothered by the way the sheet falls and exposes his cock straining against his belly, leaking precum.
She crosses the room quickly and lets him pull her onto the bed, abandoning any intention she had of teasing him more. They sink down into the mattress, kissing deeply, picking right up where they left off. In one swift motion, he rolls her onto her back and settles himself between her thighs. She feels him ease back slightly and her eyes flutter open.
"Hi."
"Now he wants to say 'hi'." Her eyes roll and she shrieks out a laugh when he leans down, biting her neck in a way that's sure to leave a mark.
"When did you buy these?" He asks in a low voice, running a fingertip under the wispy lace on her hipbone.
"A few days ago. I knew I'd have a chance to wear them soon enough." She grins up at him, stroking her hands purposefully down his chest.
"You knew?"
"Mmm, you're an easy lay," She states nonchalantly, then gasps as she feels him pulling experimentally at the sides of her thong, "Fitz!"
He feigns innocence, "What?"
"Don't you dare. I like these."
"Fine," He relents with a petulant frown, releasing his grip on the delicate lace, "If you won't let me rip these off you, I guess…"
She bites her lip as he slips a hand between her thighs to tug her thong to one side, dragging his fingertips between her soft inner folds, feeling how wet and ready she is for him. He ghosts his thumb over her clit and smiles darkly when her hips jump at the lightest touch. Her body writhes beneath him, needy for more and her lips part on a sigh when he pulls her thong back in place. She stares at him with wide eyes, confused until she realizes he's deliberately going to tease her and she whimpers helplessly.
His hands move to grip the elasticated waistband on her hips and with a devilish smirk, he tugs up, applying sharp pressure to her clit to make her hiss between her teeth. Caught between pleasure and pain, she bites her bottom lip to stifle her cries as he repeats the motion, again and again, pulling and releasing. The tension coiling in her belly eventually snaps and she stills his hands, digging her nails into his forearms.
"I can't – please, take them off!" She whines, almost offended by the silky garment she was so adamant about protecting just a couple of minutes ago.
Finally, he gives in, dragging her thong down with all the gentleness he possesses, giving her an obvious smile. A shivery sigh sounds from her throat when he lifts her by the waist and hauls her up, giving himself more space to get comfortable between her thighs.
The moment he takes her into his mouth, her back arches as she inhales a sharp gasp. Her hands fly up and grasp the sheets, bunching the material into her fists tightly. He'd only wanted to taste her after feeling how wet she is, but now that he's here he can't resist drawing an orgasm out of her. He swirls his tongue around her clit and laps at her dripping cunt, groaning low in his throat at the taste of her.
At some point, her legs have lifted to lock around his neck and she isn't sure if it was his doing or her just moving on instinct, but he doesn't give her a chance to think on it. His lips suck, tongue caresses and teeth nip at her, driving her to the edge and he holds her there, dangling her climax just out of reach. A sound – half sob, half moan – comes from her throat and his eyes flick up to meet hers, just as she begins to beg him, murmuring his name over and over. Her pleading turns to feverish whimpering as he makes her come undone, sucking at her clit until she can't take anymore.
"I need you, I need you, please Fitz –" Her desperate, breathless cries are cut off when he kneels and suddenly pulls her up into his lap.
"Put your legs around me." He helps her by lifting her hips as she hugs his torso with her thighs.
They haven't truly slowed down like this since he was in the White House, because she hadn't allowed them to, but now she's ready and he knows it too; he's already taking her there, gently lowering her onto his cock and beginning to roll his pelvis under hers. She can't help but sigh with relief at the sensation of him so thick and full inside of her.
His mouth finds the spot on her neck that makes her tremble as he reaches up to cup her breasts, thumbs brushing over her pebbled nipples through her silky bra.
"Missed you," She whispers hotly into his ear and buries her fingers in the curls at the back of his head, guiding him back to her lips to kiss him, "Missed you so much."
"Don't have to miss me, baby," He mumbles with a soft shake of his head, idly toying with the frill of lace above her nipples, "I'm right here."
"No… I mean like this," Her brows furrow and she pants unevenly as she glances down to where their bodies are joined, then back up to meet his stormy eyes, "Missed this."
It all clicks into place then and he understands; she's missed being this intimate and vulnerable with him. In recent years their sex life has been a series of rushed trysts; she hasn't allowed herself to be close to him, out of fear he'd really see her (though, of course, he knows her better than she knows herself and he could always see her).
Anytime they've been in lotus it's forced them to go slow, to take their time, kiss through it, and make lots of eye contact. He knows how overwhelming this position is for her and he gets it, it's a lot for him, too. After everything they've been through they both need to connect like this; all they're able to do is kiss and hold each other while they slowly rock together, letting the intensity build.
The slow, slick grind of their bodies moving in sync is exactly what she's been craving without knowing it. He reaches behind to unfasten the clasp on her bra and as she slides the straps down her arms, tossing the lingerie aside, he presses his hand to her lower back, tilting her hips so that her clit rubs against his pubic bone. Her muscles clench around him at the added sensation and her mouth falls open with a breathy moan when he leans down, dragging his lips over her breasts.
"You feel so good," She exhales a sigh of pleasure, gently weaving her fingers in his hair to encourage the dizzying suction of his mouth on her nipples, "Nobody has ever made me feel like you do."
Her hushed confession makes his pulse race faster and a low growl sounds from his throat. Even when she's been with other men, he's known that nobody has been able to worship her body and make her reach euphoric highs of pleasure like he does, but hearing it from her lips quells any lingering jealousy and insecurity he has buried about her.
The hands in his hair gently tug as she pulls him up to kiss her again, missing his lips on hers. He bites her bottom lip and sucks it into his mouth, releasing it with an audible smack. She chases after him, kissing him tongue first and moaning into his mouth. He can feel she's trying to hold back her next orgasm from the way her muscles flutter around his cock and her hips tremble and stutter. He isn't there yet, but he knows her body and she'll be able to come again after this, so he slips his hand between their heated bodies to rub her clit with his fingertips.
"C'mon, let go," He murmurs lowly as he drags his lips to the sensitive spot below her ear, "I know you're close."
Her mouth falls open when he bites her earlobe and sucks it, soothing it with his tongue to make her whimper. He flattens the hand at the base of her back, making her grind against his fingers with more pressure. When she comes she's silent and he leans back to watch her, brows furrowed and lips parted in a silent scream, her whole body tensing up. Then she breathes out raggedly and sags against his chest, panting and shaking through it.
"I love you, I love you, I love you." She's barely able to catch her breath, but she still uses those gasps for oxygen to let him know. To remind him of how much he means to her.
"Shhh... I know, I know." He whispers in her ear, gently cradling her in his arms and supporting her until her breathing evens out.
The subtle rock of his hips under hers picks up pace again when she recovers enough to push against his shoulders, using him for leverage. Her nails dig into his skin as she writhes on top of him, implicitly knowing what he needs from the way his hands slide down her back to squeeze her ass. They've always been able to communicate best through physical touch, but they haven't felt this connected in such a long time. Sex had become a way to quiet her mind and avoid intimacy, while still being close to him and getting relief, but he knows this isn't true anymore. She's so warm and loving as she leans in, kissing him with eyes open, letting him in. Every part of him aches because he's never felt love like this, so bare and honest, real and present.
"Want you to come," She pants out between kisses, eyes hazy and sex-drunk, "Are you close, baby?"
He can only grunt deeply in response, too far gone to be able to form words. Her mouth curves with a tired but knowing smile and she squeezes her muscles around him, biting her bottom lip when a low, intense groan vibrates from deep in his throat. He tries to keep his gaze on her, but the sensation of her body clenching around his cock is too much and his eyes slide shut subconsciously. With the added pressure of his hands gripping her ass, encouraging the grind of her hips over his, her clit drags against his pubic bone with every rock.
It's rare for them to be able to come at the same time, but tonight they're so in tune with one another, more connected than they have been in years. When she falls apart, he's already right there with her, moaning desperately against her shoulder as he spills himself inside her. They're entwined in each other in the afterglow; it's a blur of labored breaths, lingering caresses of roaming hands, and lazy brushes of their lips against heated, sweat-slick skin.
"I love you." Fitz sighs into her mouth, he can't get enough of the taste of her.
Olivia lets him kiss her a little longer, eventually pulling away to kneel up on shaky legs. She inhales a muted gasp as his spent cock slips out of her and he helps her rearrange herself, sitting across his lap with her legs to the side.
"God, Fitz –" She huffs out a breathy laugh and caresses his jaw with her fingertips. "You're too much."
"I try." He flashes her the most devastatingly handsome grin, eyes half-lidded.
"And that," Fitz gestures to the expansive, empty plot of land ahead, "That's where my Presidential Library will be built."
"Oh wow, really?" Olivia's eyes drift from his to the miles of lush, green grass in front of them. A surge of pride rushes through her, filling her body with warmth.
They'd taken advantage of the beautiful weather and spent the morning hiking. When they were on their way back to the house, they'd reached the top of a steep incline and paused to catch their breaths when he'd announced casually that he'd wanted her to see something. She'd had no idea that something would be such a monument to his career and the legacy he's building.
"Maybe I can show you the plans and get your thoughts?" He asks with an easy smile, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her into his side.
"Of course, you know I'd love that."
"Another time."
"You know we've got the whole weekend, right?"
"And it can wait. This weekend is just for us."
Her teeth tug at her bottom lip as she bites back a smile; she doesn't argue with him like she normally would, letting herself enjoy their time together because, for the first time in their relationship, they can.
"Okay."
"We're not far from home. How about turkey sandwiches for lunch?"
There's something so adorably domesticated about his question that – to her surprise – she finds herself grinning, relishing the way her heart flutters in her chest.
"What are you thinking about?" Olivia asks later, when they're soaking their tired bodies in a bath together.
A boyish grin pulls at the corners of Fitz's mouth as he answers, "Your tits look incredible."
She scoffs out a laugh, rolling her eyes at him. From the other end of the tub, he watches her fold her arms across her chest with a smirk.
"You're a tease, you know that?"
"You love it."
He locks eyes with her, staring intently at her for a weighted moment. Then he bites his bottom lip and exhales a contented sigh, "Yeah, I do."
It makes her beam, chocolate eyes glittering as he pulls her leg out of the water, gently rubbing her calf to soothe her aching muscles.
"Ooh, that feels nice," She moans softly and sags back, arms sliding up to grip the edge of the bathtub, "You're good with your hands."
"So I've been told." He flashes her a grin just before her eyes drift shut while he works his thumbs into her sore calf.
"Remind me to buy some better hiking boots for next time we're here."
"What? Your fancy Prada boots aren't good enough?"
Olivia peers out of one eye to half glare at him, "They're great. Just not ideal for the goddamn mountain you decided to drag me up."
"Mountain?" Fitz repeats, laughing deeply as he switches to massage her other leg, "It wasn't a mountain, I went easy on you today."
"Uh-huh, sure," She murmurs with a teasing edge of skepticism to her voice, then tips her head back and wiggles her toes at him, "You can give me a foot rub while you're at it."
"So bossy." He grins and does exactly as he's told, getting to work by applying pressure to the arch of her dainty foot.
They're quiet for a while until she hums contentedly, eyes fluttering open to watch him. He only realizes she's staring at him when he swaps to massage her other foot.
He lifts a brow when he registers the look on her face, "Got something on your mind, pretty girl?"
"I just – I've loved spending this weekend here, with you." Olivia states with a faint smile, but there's a seriousness underlying her expression that makes him think she's holding something back.
"It's not over yet, we still have tomorrow," Fitz reasons, then adds as an afterthought, "We could fly back to DC Monday, if you want to. Stay another night?"
She shakes her head softly, "No, you have that meeting Monday morning. We'll leave tomorrow."
"Okay," He tilts his head to one side, studying her intently as he places her foot back in the water. He contemplates digging deeper, but decides to save it for another time and changes the subject, "Wanna order pizza for dinner?"
"You're not cooking for me?" An adorable pout forms on her lips and he can't help but chuckle.
"Goddamnit, you really are just with me for food!" He's pretending to be outraged at her but makes no attempt to hide the amusement on his face.
She bites back a smile, stifling giggles, "You should take it as a compliment."
"I'm pretty sure I can find a better way to spend our evening that doesn't involve cooking."
"Oh yeah?"
Fitz reaches under the water to grasp Olivia's thighs and pull her into his lap, drawing her into a long, heated kiss. His tongue slides over her bottom lip, teasing her, giving her a taste of what he wants to give her. When she leans into it, he eases back with a smirk because he knows he's won.
"You sure you want me to cook?" He asks in a low voice, leaning down to drag his lips over her neck and chest. His teeth graze her collarbone and he smiles against her wet skin when he hears her inhale a shallow gasp.
"There's not something else you'd rather I spent my time doing?" He murmurs suggestively, flicking his tongue over one of her breasts as his hands squeeze her hips.
"I – uh –" Her brain short-circuits when he closes his lips around her nipple, and her hands find his hair, gently pulling at the damp curls.
"Tell me, Liv." He pulls back when she tries to arch into him, grinning widely because she's already flushed and he's barely touched her.
"C'mon, I want you," She breathes, placing her hands on his shoulders to use him for stability as she climbs out of the bathtub, "We're done in here."
With a laugh at her eagerness, he follows her out, draining the water from the tub.
On Sunday morning Fitz wakes up early, feeling the warmth of Olivia's body pressed skintight against him. His eyes drift open and the sight of her entangled in his arms is immediately overwhelming. After a weekend together with barely a moment spent apart, he's not sure why it hits him now. He slips out of her embrace, careful not to wake her, and lets her sleep in, leaving a note promising to return with breakfast before they leave in the afternoon.
When he comes back armed with croissants and coffee from a bakery in Rutland, he finds Olivia in the library, with the log burner lit. She doesn't even look up from her laptop screen or register his presence until he speaks, disturbing the silence.
"I had a feeling you couldn't take a whole weekend off," He says with a teasing grin, catching the moment her eyes light up when they lift to meet his, "What are you working on?"
"Uh, I'm not working, actually," She utters, giving him a nervous smile and patting the seat beside her, "Come here."
He walks over, placing the paper bag of pastries and coffee cups on the table beside her laptop as she half closes it, hiding the screen. He sits down and slips an arm around her waist to draw her in for a kiss.
"Hi."
The reminder that it's just Fitz – her Fitz – seems to relax her nerves a little and her smile meets her eyes this time. She exhales softly, "Hi."
"What's going on?" He asks, flicking a glance toward the laptop on the coffee table.
Olivia takes a shallow breath, "I decided to sell my apartment. My real estate agent called earlier with an offer; I accepted it."
"Oh," Fitz is stunned, his brows lift in surprise, "You're sure this is what you want? I had no idea you were even thinking of moving."
"I'm sure," She nods, resolute in her decision, "It's something I've thought about for a long time, I was just waiting for the dust to settle."
"But… It's your apartment, you love your apartment."
"I did, but so many bad things happened there. I haven't felt safe there in a long time," She pauses, brows furrowing as her breath catches, "Not since I was kidnapped."
He instinctively draws her into a protective embrace, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead. Then he asks, "So what now?"
"Well," She pulls slightly out of his arms to reach for her laptop and places it into his lap, lifting the lid, "I found a place."
He looks at the screen, eyes scanning over images of a house. With nine thousand square foot, six bedrooms, a private pool in the basement, and an expansive yard lined with tall trees, it's a huge home for one person.
"This is big." He observes quietly as he continues to scroll the real estate listing.
"It's ours, Fitz," She announces in a soft but self-assured voice, "I want this for us."
His eyes meet hers, searching for any doubt or apprehension, but he only finds calm there. He sets the laptop back down and turns to her, "This is fast, Liv. Are you sure?"
A warm smile lights up her face and she takes his hand, lacing their fingers together as she speaks, "I've been in love with you for more than a decade, it's hardly fast."
"It's just… This is a lot." He's not just talking about the price tag, it's a huge step for them – for her.
"I wasn't lying when I told you I wanted to build our life together," Olivia gently reminds him, staring intently at him, "Having this house in Vermont is great, I love it here... But I'm not done working yet, and I don't think you are either. You and I could settle down in DC together, split our time between here and there."
Fitz tips his head to the side and his chest heaves as he takes in a deep breath, then he states, "You're serious, aren't you?"
"You're not the only one who can make grand gestures, you know?" Olivia teases with a small smile touching her lips.
"How long have you been planning this?" He glances back at the laptop screen, eyeing their future.
"Honestly? For a long time it was my secret hobby, looking at houses for us, imagining our future, even when I didn't believe we had a chance anymore," Her eyes drop from his in remorse, it's too painful, too shameful to think about, "But after what we went through this past year – exposing B613, almost losing everything, David –"
She cuts herself off then, swallowing against the uncomfortable lump in her throat. It's only been two and a half weeks, and the memory of their friend's murder at the hands of Cyrus Beene is still raw. He pulls a hand from hers to wrap his arm around her waist, comforting her.
"Perspective is a beautiful thing," She lifts her gaze to his, staring thoughtfully at him, "I realized how much we've missed out on, how much time I've wasted," she pauses, her eyes turning glassy as she continues earnestly, "SoI decided I'm done wasting time apart from you."
Whatever I want.
Her own words ring in her head again and a teary smile tugs at the corner of her lips as she lays a palm on his chest, over his heart.
"I really didn't want this weekend to end," She shakes her head softly, squeezing his hand in hers, "And it doesn't have to, not if we don't want it to. I don't want it to."
Fitz looks at her for a long beat, then grins slowly and finally speaks, "Let's do it."
"Yeah?" A brilliant smile spreads across Olivia's face.
"Yeah, of course I want to live with you," He nods emphatically and lifts her hand to his mouth, kissing her knuckles tenderly, "Just one thing, though."
"What?" She eyes him curiously, watching him place her hand back in her lap to dig his into his pocket.
When he pulls out a small antique jewelry box she immediately recognizes it, feeling tears bubbling up, threatening to spill down her cheeks. She lets out a shaky breath as he opens it with care, delicately plucking out Doux Bébé between his thumb and forefinger.
"You're giving it back to me?" Her voice comes out in a hoarse whisper, tight with emotion.
Almost three years have passed since she'd returned the ring to him, discreetly through Abby, following their bitterly painful breakup. She couldn't keep it; they had no future, no chance of ever making it together, and the meaning behind it was gone. She imagined he'd maybe passed it along to Karen or sold it to a collector.
"It belongs to you, Livvie. Nobody else." He states as if he can read her thoughts.
She offers her hand to him, letting him slide the ring down her pointer finger, back in its rightful place. The weight of it wrapped around her finger is a physical reminder of their love; that despite it all, they have made it. They're going to make it.
"So," Olivia begins as she adjusts it slightly, tracing her thumb along the overlapping bands, "How long have you been planning this?"
Fitz breathes out a chuckle at the way she mimics his question from moments earlier, "A while."
"And you just happened to have it in your pocket?" Her gaze drifts from the ring to him and she raises a brow slightly.
"Not exactly," He hesitates like he's holding back for a second, but then he exhales softly and continues, "When I woke up this morning with you in my arms, in our house, I… I got overwhelmed."
"I figured there was a reason you'd left before I woke up." She states quietly, leaning over to rest her elbow on the back of the couch.
"I freaked out a little...It really hit me, thinking about how I almost lost you, how we almost didn't have this together," With a quiet exhale he looks at her, gesturing vaguely to the room, his stormy eyes thoughtful, "I took the ring to a local jeweler to get it cleaned this morning and I was going to give it back to you when we got back to DC, but I didn't want to wait."
"I've missed wearing it." She says simply, her smile relaxed as it edges onto her face.
He can't resist moving in close, capturing her lips in a sweet kiss that makes her melt, sighing happily into his mouth.
"You taste like pastry," She hums against his lips, letting her tongue drag along his top lip, "Did you eat already?"
He pulls away slightly, chewing back a rueful smirk, "I may have had a bite of a croissant on the drive home."
"A bite?" Her brows raise and she eyes him suspiciously.
"Okay, okay, one croissant. Just one."
"I can't believe you didn't wait for me!" She feigns outrage at him, staring with her mouth agape.
"I got you a pain au chocolat, do you forgive me?" He teases as he reaches for the bag of pastries, handing her a cup with 'French vanilla' scrawled on the side as he takes the black coffee for himself.
"It's a start." Her lips curve with a smile she hides behind her cup.
He gazes at her for a long moment, looking at her with warmth and unadulterated adoration in his eyes, like he can't believe they're here.
"Show me the house again?"
His request only makes her smile brighter.
A/N: Just a quick note, I'll be posting the full/unedited explicit versions of my fics (including this one) over at ao3. The links will be on my twitter olitzmakingjam
