Anya, Now

Anya, in her seat in a corner of the Berlint University Library doodled on what was supposed to be her notes for her advanced classical language class. While she and her study partner (who was also her partner in other subjects) Arnold Crowley were sufficiently knowledgeable in classical language, they still held study groups for their peers to better understand the subject. While she enjoyed the company of her friends and acquaintances, this was not how she wanted to spend a Friday night. Especially not when he would be there.

"I know you don't enjoy these study sessions, but can we please make it through this session without veering off topic Anya?" Arnold asked her with a slight joking manner in his voice.

Anya sighed, "In my defense, last time was George's fault for asking Emile what 'Bond Man' was. I mean, who didn't watch Spy Wars when we were kids?" She scoffed at the absurdity that there were people their age who never watched one of her favorite childhood cartoons.

"I barely watched it", Arnold chuckled as he watched her get worked up over it again.

"Whatever," Anya said rolling her eyes, "I always forget that you guys were probably too busy focusing on how well you advance your parents' companies, or gain political power, or whatever else."

Arnold chuckled once more, "Not true, we did other things."

"Like what?"

"Study classical language," Arnold said while glancing at Anya's notes.

"Whatever," she said with another sigh.

"Hey," he said, cuffing her face with his large hand, "How about after this we go back to my dorm, and I take some time to study more?" He said in a low, sultry voice.

Anya felt the blood rush to her cheeks at this advancement from Arnold. Anya read his mind for a few seconds while looking into his eyes. She could see him imagining how he would bed her later tonight, and she was almost looking forward to it.

Thankfully, her telepathy had never disappeared. Although, at this point it was a well-kept family secret (including Becky). Instead, as she grew older, she was able to master this skill, learning the range of her ability, and even how to tune out minds she did not want to read. This helped her ability to be in crowds. This is how she was able to figure that Arnold had developed feelings for her during their final year of Eden Academy, and they had been ignited again when they met during their first year of university.

Anya nodded her head. "I would like that a lot," she said in a tempting whisper. She leaned in for a kiss when they were interrupted by footsteps and a groan that Anya knew too well.

"I know we're a few minutes late, but you two could have waited a little longer before getting all hot and bothered," Becky Blackbell said while sitting in the chair next to Anya.

Anya giggled while her face turned even more red. "Sorry Becky, you guys were taking too long."

"Well, you know this isn't something that is done in a rush." Becky scoffed while gesturing to herself.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, where's everyone else?" Anya asked while checking the grand clock at the front of the library for the time.

"I saw Damian pulling in the parking lot, and Emile and Ewen walking from one of the communal areas. As for Bill, he wanted me to let you all know that he wouldn't be able to make it, and I have no idea where George is." Becky explained while pulling out her classical language textbook from her backpack. It still had the sheep keychain on it that her and Anya got when they were little girls on their first shopping trip.

Just as she finished saying that George Glooman walked up to their table and sat there next to Becky, not saying a word, and pulling out his notebook. "I'm right here," he said jokingly.

"We can wait a few more minutes for the guys, right Anya?" Becky asked.

"Sure, I don't mind," Anya shrugged.

Except, she did mind. She minded very much. She was not looking forward to seeing Damian Desmond again. Not when her heart still pounded just a little bit harder when he was in the room with her. Although throughout their time in grade school they became friends, she would rather not be around him now and his girlfriend of the month. Particularly since she still felt embarrassment about her failed attempt at confessing her feelings to the second son of the Desmond family.


Anya, Then

It was the beginning of the second semester of their final year at Eden Academy. Anya and Damian were in the quaint Forger home's living room. Yuri and Yor were in the dining room having pleasant conversations, Loid was in his old bedroom now turned office with a sleeping Bond. The teenagers were trying to assist each other with homework.

"So, he had both Ostania and Westalis believing that there was a secret hidden in the painting, and there was nothing?" Anya asked Damian with a confused look.

"No, we don't know what was in the painting, that was all speculation." Damian said, shaking his head.

"Then why was it so significant?" Anya asked, eating one peanut from the bowl that was in front of them.

"I… don't really know" Damian said with a laugh while he too ate a peanut.

"I don't get this unit." Anya said.

"It's not too hard to learn the history, I think you're struggling to understand the history."

"Is it that obvious?" she asked, with a shocked look on her face.

Laughing, Damian put his arm around Anya, "Kind of", he responded.

Anya's heart thumped hard in her chest. So hard she worried that he might feel it.

Her feelings for Damian had made themselves clear to her at the beginning of the first semester, when rumors began floating around about a nightly visitor to the dorm of the Desmond boy. When Anya asked him about it, all he did was give her a wry smile. She then read his mind to learn there was truth to this rumor. Her reaction, instead of being one of nonchalance, was the opposite. She found herself getting angry at just the thought of Damian taking another girl into his dorm.

That's when she knew she liked Damian Desmond as more than a friend. Unfortunately, every time she read his mind; he showed no similar interest in her, at least now he did not. In fact, she wasn't sure she just liked him, this crush felt different than her other ones.

She felt her cheeks get warm as Damian flipped through his history book with his free hand. She looked up at him and gulped. When he caught her staring at him, he looked down at her, worry coming across his face.

"Are you okay? Is it too warm in here for you?" he asked with concern.

"Yes! It is too warm in here! Let me take this off" Anya said with panic in her voice. She began taking off her cardigan.

Damian removed his arm to allow her to take off her outerwear. Once it was off, he closed his book and looked at Anya intensely. Her heart skipped a beat. She wanted to let him know exactly how she felt. She read his mind, and there is nothing to indicate that he is feeling the same thing she is. She sighs mentally, it would be a waste. "He is like totally in love with you!" She heard Becky say in the back of her mind. Becky had said this right before their Winter Holiday break when Damian had given her a gift. Anya knew there was truth to this. She had read his mind their entire grade school career. She knew he had feelings for her. He never acted on them, in fact there was a time when she thought he hated her. Now here she was, having feelings for him, but now she could hardly tell if he still reciprocated them.

She needed to tell him how she felt.

"What are you looking at?" She asked, tilting her head to the side.

"You have a small peanut in your hair," he answered dryly.

She shook her head and ran her fingers through it. "Is it out?" She asked, while Damian began laughing at her.

"Yep. You know I never understood your obsession with peanuts, it's so odd."

"Well, they're good for you, plus I find them quite tasty."

She popped another peanut in her mouth and pondered what they would do next. This was the point of their homework time where no work was done at all, instead they would watch a movie together or play a board game. This time, Damian began packing up his homework and textbooks.

"Where are you going?" Anya asked.

"Oh, I have to head out, I have a… meeting tonight," he said cautiously, waiting for her response.

Anya read his mind again, this time seeing Scarlett Sheffield and what he planned on doing with her at this 'meeting'. She knew it would be pointless to say anything at this point. It was so clear that he did not have feelings for her beyond their friendship. Why would he? They were literally from two different worlds, even her own father once said that she was not up to his caliber.

But then again why should that stop her from pursuing him and letting him know how she feels? Her own father didn't let being a spy stop him from marrying (for real) an assassin from the former enemy country.

"Oh, okay, have fun". Anya said assertively, like she was trying to convince herself that was what she wanted to happen.

"Oh, I will, later."

Anya walked him to the door and opened it for him. As he said his goodbyes to the Forgers, Anya followed behind him, shutting the door.

"Damian, I have something to tell you." She said matter-of-factly.

He turned around, backpack flung on one shoulder. "What is it?"

"I have feelings for you." she said quickly, looking down after the words escaped her lips. Her heart thumped harder in her chest, her body felt warmer, and her stomach began twisting itself into knots.

Then, he just looked at her. She read his mind one last time, "I cannot believe she's telling me this. As if I hadn't already made it clear nothing could happen between us-" she immediately stopped listening. She turned away from him. Tears began welling in her eyes. Damian took one step towards her, with a look of pity on him. One she hadn't seen since they were first years.

"Anya, you know just as much as I do that even us being friends is an absurdity, us dating?" He stressed the last word, almost scoffing while saying it. He took a step towards her, grabbed her arm and turned her back around.

Her eyes were watery with unshed tears and her lips quivered a bit; he hadn't seen her this upset in years. He opened his mouth, then closed it while biting his lip. Trying to carefully find his next words.

"It's okay! I understand, just forget about this. I would hate for this to affect our friendship. I mean, you're right. Us being friends is an anomaly within itself. I'll see you tomorrow!" she said, wiping away her tears and squirming her arm away from his grip.

With that, she closed the front door and went to her room. She sat on the edge of the bed and stared at the floor. Bond lazily walked in and whimpered a bit while headbutting her hands. She let him come up to her bed and lay next to her while she cried.


Anya, Now

"Oh, look it's the Lord and his flunkies!" Becky exclaimed teasingly as Ewen, Emile, and Damian walked toward the table together.

The trio laughed at her remark, sitting at the table to join the rest. Damian sat across from Anya. She felt her stomach tying itself into a knot, albeit a small one. Since her failed confession, they were just platonic friends, at least for the rest of their final year at Eden. By their first year of university, they were more distanced due to their different majors (Anya still being undecided). While she wished they would hang out like they used to, she decided it was better this way, she was able to get him off her mind.

"Well, let's get started. I have some plans tonight." Damian said dryly, taking out his book and notebook.

"Oh, who's the lucky lady this month?" Becky asked.

"Opal Harrington," Emile answered before Damian even opened his mouth.

"We've actually been seeing each other for two months. She hasn't asked about my father yet, and I like it that way" Damian said.

Anya stiffened at the mention of Opal. She was an attractive young girl who was half a head taller than Anya. She had long strawberry blonde hair with green eyes and fair skin. She came from a family that was also a part of the National Unity Party. She was the groups' junior by a year and an Eden alumnus herself. She noticed how happy Damian seemed at the mention of her.

"Ahem," Arnold said, clearing his throat. "We should get started."

Within an hour of trying to study and tutor, they were off topic. Anya and George were gushing about the latest additions to their favorite graphic novel series. Damian was occupied by his homework, Becky, Ewen, and Emile were bickering. Arnold was beginning to pack up his things.

Noticing this, Becky looked down at her watch. "Oh, I guess we should all get going then. It is a Friday after all, I want to watch the latest Berlint in Love," she said, packing her things as well. The others followed suit, saying their goodbyes.

As everyone left the library, Anya realized she left her classical language notes on the table. On her way back in, she saw Damian approaching her, notes in hand. He handed them to her.

"You left these on the table."

"Thanks," she said, grabbing the notes, turning around.

"No problem, you know," Damian began, causing her to turn back around to face him. "We haven't really hung out like we used to, outside of studying. we really should," he finished, with a small smile.

Anya stood there for a moment, processing what he said. She read his mind, "We could get Bill, Emile, Ewen, George, and Becky all together. Watch a movie, drink a few drinks, order out…"

"I'd love to! It feels like forever since we all did something that wasn't school related." She said happily.

"I'll talk to the guys and let you know," he said, and he walked out with her.

Arnold caught up with them as they walked outside. He put his arm around Anya and sent a glare towards Damian. "Back off Desmond, she doesn't want to be your girl of the week," he thought. However, Anya did want to be Damian's girl, or at least she had wanted to. She knew it was a long shot now, but the smallest part of her still held onto hope. The way Damian was now felt so different from the one she knew at Eden, the one she had fallen for.

Arnold and Anya walked toward his dorm, while Damian got in his car. Within minutes they were at the dormitory building for second year men at Berlint University. Much like Eden, this school was grand and old, adorned with classical decorations and architecture. They entered Arnold's dorm and set their things down. Thankfully, there were no roommates for the second years and up.

Anya sat on his bed, while he went to the restroom, "I can't stay too long tonight, my dad is making Hamburg steak tonight and it's my favorite." She called out to him.

"That's fine, I have some class work to catch up on." He walked back into the bedroom, sitting next to her. "You know I'd love to talk more about classical language with you" he said before kissing her.

She kissed back, "You know we don't need to talk about classical language at all." She kissed him again.

No words were left to be said, they began kissing harder. They wanted each other badly. Their hands were exploring each other's bodies. Anya was no stranger to this level of intimacy, before Arnold she had one other suitor, this was after Damian rejected her. All he did was fill the hole that was left in her by Damian. Like what Arnold would be doing soon. It was not that she was using Arnold, she really did like him.

But he was not Damian, no one would ever be. She could live with that. At least, that is what she convinced herself to believe for the past two years.


Damian, Now

Damian watched as Arnold and Anya walked towards the men's dorms. It was always hard for him to see those two together. It was even harder to ignore the pang in his chest anytime he saw Arnold touch Anya. He thought he was fully over her. He tried to persuade himself that he was when they were still at Eden Academy. Even when she finally told him that she felt the same way about him, it was too late. He was over her.


Damian, Then

"I have feelings for you."

I cannot believe she's telling me this. As if I hadn't already made it clear nothing could happen between us to myself. As if I haven't wanted to hear those words for years!" He thought.

"Anya, you know just as much as I do that even us being friends is an absurdity, us dating?" He stressed the last word, almost scoffing while saying it. He tried to tell himself that those were the words that he really meant, but in his heart, he knew it was a lie. What was absurd was her confessing to him now. What was absurd was his response to her. He wanted to take Anya into his arms and kiss her; to hold her and never let go.

He was already on his way to meet Scarlett Sheffield. He had been using these girls to take his mind off Anya. While he knew what he was doing was not becoming of a Desmond family member, but his way of coping. He was not like Anya who could talk to her mother and father about her issues. All he had was Jeeves, and he already knew what Jeeves would say to his behavior. But this was the only way that he could distract himself from her.

"It's okay! I understand, just forget about this. I would hate for this to affect our friendship. I mean, you're right. Us being friends is an anomaly within itself. I'll see you tomorrow!" she said, squirming away from his grip. His hurt panged when he saw the tears welling in her eyes. She went back into the Forger residence and closed the door.

He stood out there for a bit, staring at the door. He wanted to knock it down and let her know- that he did not mean anything that he had just said. He wanted to wipe away the tears and embrace her. But he knew that he could not, he should not. He told himself he did not deserve to be with someone like Anya. He needed someone like him, cold, calculated, only with him for his status. Something Anya was not trying to do.

He let out a deep breath and began walking downstairs towards the car. He sat inside and greeted Jeeves.

"Lord Damian, are you alright?" Jeeves asked with a stoic expression.

"I'm fine," he responded, looking out the window at the snow falling.

"Am I still driving you to Ms. Sheffield's home?"

"Actually, I would like to just go home Jeeves." Damian said, his voice choked up.

"As you wish, shall I call Ms. Sheffield and cancel your, ahem, meeting?"

"Yes, please do Jeeves."

The rest of the ride home was silent, Damian held back tears. A Desmond should not convey how they feel after all.


Damian, Now

He wanted to believe that he was over her. He wanted to be over her. He thought he was. But seeing Arnold walk her back to his dorm let him know that he in fact was not over her. He knew he had no right feel anything negative about their relationship, he just could not help it.

He shook his head, no point in living in the past and thinking about what could have been, he had a date with Opal Harrington soon. One of the very few girls he met that did not want to use him for his status. While the National Unity Party was defunct now that the East and West were at peace, there were still older families of power that revered the Desmond family name, including the Harringtons.

He drove to the restaurant they were to meet at, Élégant. An elegant restaurant that served French cuisine. When he arrived, he saw Opal exiting her driver's car. She looked stunning. Her fair skin was glistening in the evening sky and contrasted beautifully with the black mid-thigh length dress. Her legs covered by sheer pantyhose and accentuated with the black pumps she had on. The streetlights made her strawberry blonde hair almost look pink, just like Her's. "She almost looks like her," he thought to himself. He gave her a full look from head to toe, "you look amazing." He linked her arm with his, walking into the restaurant. Informing the host that they would like to sit at the bar. Once seated both ordered a drink, Damian, a strong bourbon, Opal, a rum cocktail.

"My math class was so boring today! I mean derivatives are already complicated, the professor could at least try to make it interesting" Opal whined.

Damian took a sip of his bourbon and chuckled, "Yeah that professor is on the annoying side, I had him my first semester too. But if you ever need any help with any assignments or with studying, I will happily oblige."

Opal giggled at his remark, taking a sip of her drink, and leaning a bit closer to him, she said in a low sultry voice; "I would like that very much Damian." Her eyes glazed with lust.

"Do you want to head back to my dorm and study now?" he asked, his passion for her burning.

"I would love to," she finished her drink and set the empty glass on the bar. Damian followed suit, paid the tab, and led her to his car.

Within minutes of them arriving at his dorm, they became enthralled with each other. Their kisses were passionate, and soon they found themselves on his bed. He slipped the straps of her dress down and took his shirt off, before adorning her neck with kisses. Opal was one of the many women he had taken to bed. She filled a hole that was left by Anya. He knew he was using her, and she had to know he was using her too (just not for the same reasonings). He still liked her, just not as much as she liked him.

Either way, she was not Anya, no one would ever be. He's been living with that for years.